Self Care

Moutasem al-Hameedy

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Channel: Moutasem al-Hameedy

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AI: Summary © The importance of self care in Islam is highlighted, as it is crucial for individuals to pursue their natural tendencies and pursue their spiritual goals. The importance of avoiding evil behavior and giving suggestions and guidance is emphasized. The importance of direct instruction and socialization is emphasized, as it is essential for personal health and success. The importance of learning and practicing Islam is emphasized, as it is essential to learn and grow in a healthy way.
AI: Transcript ©
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RTR Marina, Mejia had the whole Fela Mobley Lella who won a yoke little fella. The Allah wa shadow

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Illa Illa Allah who the whole Sherry Keller was shadow Anna Mohammed and Abdul who Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa alayhi wasallam yeah you heard Adina Allah have got to hottie he was moved on

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to mostly mon

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a Johan Sutopo Baku Mala the Halacha comin FC Wahida will call up I mean has a huge aha with them in Houma region Kathy are on one is

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what? Hola Hola de tous Luna v one

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in hola Hakuna Alikum Marathi Eva. Yeah, you have a lady in law who studied useless law Come on. Come while federal law calm do know back home won a huge lake Havasu there who forgot if the photos are now Lima. And that I do in the upper Hadith Nikita Avila here as well. Have you ever had you had Yun Ebina Mohammed in sallallahu alayhi wa early he was a lamb or shovel or more data to her Wakulla more data to work with that in Allah Allah, all praises due to Allah we praise Him, we seek his aid and we ask for his forgiveness. We seek refuge and protection in Allah from the evils of ourselves and the evil consequences of our own actions. Whomsoever Allah guides, none can lead astray. And

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whomsoever Allah leaves to go astray, none can guide are you bear witness that none has the right to be worshipped. None has the right to our ultimate love and devotion. But Allah subhanho wa Taala alone, and I bear witness and testify that Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam is His servant and His Messenger or you who believe fear Allah as he should be feared and die not accept as Muslims in a state of submission to Allah, all mankind, be dutiful to your Lord who created you from a single person, and from him he created his wife, and from them both, he created many men and women and fear Allah through whom you demand your mutual rights and observe the rights of your kin. Surely Allah is

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ever an old watcher over you, or you who believe. Keep your duty to Allah, fear him and speak the truth, he will direct you to righteous deeds, and will forgive you your sins. And whoever obeys Allah and His Messenger has indeed attained a great achievement, the best words of those of Allah and the best guidance is that of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa early he was sending them. And the worst thing in the religion are the newly invented matters for all the newly invented methods and religion are considered to be innovation and bidder and every bidder is misguidance.

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We said repeatedly, so many times, and we've demonstrated from verses in the Quran and statements from the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam, that Islam constitutes a comprehensive way of life. It provides guidance in the different facets of life, and provides frameworks and foundations for us to live a meaningful, balanced, purposeful life. And that's a great part of the Mercy of Allah subhanho wa taala. The principle that we will explore today that is strongly present in the system of Islam yet, it is very it is tacit, you will find it subtle. And sometimes the subtle principles the hidden principles have more power, like an imam is sharply bigger Rahim Allah says in his great book and

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more I forgot, is a lot of this subtle guidance in Islam, that is not necessarily stated so directly, has so much power because it is everywhere in Islam. And you can read it, but you can when you read between the lines, you can see it everywhere. So the principle that we will talk today about is self care,

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self care and to many Muslims that might seem like a foreign concept within Islam that why would we talk about self care because within certain cultures within certain traditions,

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the emphasis has been on put putting yourself down and treating the self as a pure evil entity, but the reality is not so. The reality is not so you will find oftentimes in the guidance that we have in the Quran and the

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the advice of the prophets

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Hello Annie we sell them you will find there is a lot of direct a lot of directives, a lot of instruction to take care of the self. Because the self is the tool is the vehicle through which we navigate this life. And if we don't take care of it, then it's not going to service. So, a lot of us know the famous story that happened between Sohei a Rumi of the Allahu Anhu and the other companion, I would doubt it that the Allahu Anhu when I saw him, so the wife of a Buddha and she wasn't taking care of herself, like her looks. She was disheveled Her clothes were not in good state. And he asked her why, like, why are you in this state continuously in the state? She said, it's your friend, I

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would doubt that he has no desire in this life. He has no desire, even in his wife. He's so focused on worship. He's so focused on devotion, and probably focused on the akhira.

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So, so Hebrew, me took note of that, and he realized this is not the way to go. And so I began, Rumi was more knowledgeable than I would have done in that respect.

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And

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there was an AHA between both of them. So Cyberoam, used to live in the house of Abu Dhabi,

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in one part of the house of Abu Dhabi. So when the night came, oh, during the day,

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Abu Dhabi prepared some food for Sahib being his guest. So he prepared the food and he offered it to Sohaib. And so I've said eat with me, he said, I'm fasting.

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So So Hebrew me insisted that Buddha eats with him.

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And we

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finally gave in and he ate, he broke his fast and he ate with Sahiba Romi. Then when it was nighttime,

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so he brought me one wanting to go to bed. But after that I wanted to pray after Isha, he wanted to pray that the young, the voluntary prayers.

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So So Hebrew me said to him sleep, go to bed now. Go to bed now. And the companies respected when someone was even a little bit ahead of them in knowledge, they would respect that, and they would take advice. So he took advice from him, and he wants to sleep. So he wrote me as well went to sleep. When it was past midnight, and the last third of the nights hybrid, Rami wakes up, he makes will do to start praying, damn Elaine, and he wakes up with the data and he says, Now you start now you start praying. So they prayed. pmla, then Sahiba, Rumi gave him an advice, a valuable advice. And he said to him, in Europe, be Canada you can have

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your Lord has rights upon you, Allah has rights upon you. Were in early beta Nikka la haka, and your body has rights on you. Were in the Lika Lika, haka, and your family, your wife, has rights upon you, for earthly couldn't let you have inhaca Give each one that you write, give it give each one of those that you write, your Lord, your Creator,

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your wife, your spouse, your family, that extends to your parents, your children, your siblings, and even

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other relatives.

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And your body has rights upon you. So you have to observe the rights of each one of those and this profound guidance. Then later on, they went to the Prophet SAW Selim, and they asked them about that incident, and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he praised what cyber Rumi said he said, the does the truth.

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And some narrations indicate that these words are actually the words of the prophets of Allah Salam himself, that he said the statement to both of them.

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So this shows that Islam takes care of what we call self care. A lot of people are hard against themselves hard on themselves. They expect too much from themselves. Religiously, maybe sometimes, profession wise, work wise, maybe in the social arena, as well. So some people really take it hard on themselves. And this is against the instructions of Islam against the guidance of Islam. Because in Islam, we have this balance between all of these different facets of our lives, different responsibilities, different stakeholders in our lives. We are supposed to give each one of them the right once you give more right or give more attention on one side, you're going to take from the

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other side, so you're doing oppression on the other side. And that's one of the reasons why the Prophet salallahu Salam says in the

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authentic hadith law I am very little meaning and you will learn AFSA

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a believer should not if I were to translate this literally, I would say, a Muslim or a believer should not humiliate themselves.

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But some words in Arabic are so wide in the meaning.

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And this is why the competitor were puzzled. They said how come a Muslim or a believer humiliates himself? So they asked Acharya rasool Allah wa key for you the loan officer, there as the companion How come? Or how, like how does someone humiliate themselves, the prophets of salaam says you have middle, Amina al Bala Mala to

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the problem says he overburdens himself. He places upon himself responsibilities, expectations burdens that he is unable to sustain and deal with.

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And that's a profound instruction from the prophets, I send them and it points directly to what we call self care. You're not supposed to exert yourself beyond your present capability. Yes, people grow into higher levels of worship, people grow into higher levels of devotion, dedication, and, you know, performance of acts of worship. But when someone starts, or someone has just started should always take it easy on themselves, because the ones who grow into higher levels of worship, these people have been building this over years and years and years and years of devotion. And this high level of performance and this high level of devotion and work comes from love and from there's a lot

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of motivation, there is a lot of passion that where they can sustain it. When someone who's just starting, they cannot they don't have this level of passion, they have to grow into that through continuous dedication. So the prophets of Solomon has given that instruction another Hadith, the prophet Allah makes it clear. And he says, in Mumbai, Salah urban Kappa, wala aapke, the Prophet SAW Selim says about what we call an Arabic el mon bet, album, but is someone who used to take the horse or camel and travel such a long distance without taking breaks without resting. So he wouldn't take a break for himself, he wouldn't give his horse or camel breaks. So the problem says such a person

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would not really be able to cross huge or long distance.

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And his horse or his animal would not be able to carry on the journey would collapse, it would collapse in the middle. So the prophecy says, This person who's so much in rushed to reach high levels or to get to his destination so quickly, so he doesn't take breaks. And he doesn't allow this kind of self care to himself and to his camel or his horse, he's not going to cross a long distance, he won't hit his target. And he's not going to give a break to his horse or his gamble, when it would not be able even to recover would break down. And this is something similar if someone keeps running on their car without servicing it without checking the oil and the engine and the other

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things, and they keep running on it, it reaches a point where it's gonna break down and probably the damage is irreparable, where they have lost the car for good. That's it, they have to scrap it.

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That's exactly the example the Prophet SAW Salem is giving. And this matches what we're talking about about self care if we do not care about ourselves, if we do not give ourselves selves breaks, if we do not

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listen to what our buddies and our our capability is saying to us communicating to us, we would be overworking ourselves. And this means we're going to reach a point of collapse, a point of burnout, a point of probably there's a point where there's no return, where we can fix ourselves. And that was essentially the advice that Sahiba Rumi gave to a Buddha early in Lahore and Houma that this is something we have to observe self care. And looking at the Muslim community in general, we don't take we don't really generally speaking, we don't take good care of ourselves. Actually, a lot of us see this in negative light, we think, Oh, you're giving your lower self or the evil side of your

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desires, you're giving it much more space. But that's not true. Because Allah subhanaw taala talks about the self. When I've seen woman as a worker for Alabama or Georgia how Taqwa Allah subhanaw taala created the self and Allah offered it both ways, both both potentials, the self has the potential to go on the right side or to go on the wrong side. The self is mere potential. So you have to preserve it. You have to nurture it, you have to service it, you have to look after it. And this is the nature of people the rock

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People who want to do a lot of good, they want to offer a lot of service. They want to do a lot of worship, or they want to help others to a point where they bend themselves, and they lose themselves in the middle. That's not

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like in line with the instructions and the general framework of Islam. It's not in Islam, we are supposed to take care of ourselves. And the prophets are seldom In another Hadith points to the fact that this is a rule in this life. This is how things run, we all have ups and downs. We all have times where we are enthusiastic and have so much passion and energy, but there are times when we don't feel like doing anything. And that's okay. There are people who blame themselves for these low times for these quiet times. They see themselves guilty. They associate shame to this must be something wrong about me that I'm unable to keep pushing myself hard. No, this is how we humans are

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designed. Everything in this life has high time and a low time and you have to accept it and deal with it. And you have to this how you have to go through this life so the prophets of salaam says in a hadith.

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It's collected by Imam Muhammad from Abdullah and possibly Allah who the prophets of salaam says liquidly Hamelin Shirwa will equally share what Inflectra the prophets of salaam says for each action for each act of worship.

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And some scholars, some of the commentators on this hadith they said basically, sometimes it can be also interpreted as for each person, there is a high time when they are enthusiastic, they have so much energy they want to they want to do so much. They want to do so much. So this is Shiva. This is a high time when you're motivated, and you feel unstoppable. You just want to do more and more and more and more. But then the prophecy is Adam says we'll equally share what Inflectra before each high time, there is downs as well there is lower lower points where this motivation and this passion fades away. And it takes a dip and it goes down.

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Then the problem gives guidance. The prophets Allah gives guidance in that sense how to treat these things, how to treat such low times should I keep pushing against myself and exerting myself even when I don't feel it even when everything in me is screaming? I can't handle this anymore. I keep pushing myself. The prophets of salaam says Femen cannot for terlato Who? Isla Suniti *wad Nigeria of Africa. Woman cannot Fatah to who Illa URI Danica de Halak. So the Prophet SAW Selim says who whoever has his low times, in accordance with my sunnah he still maintains himself within my sunnah within my guidance, the guidance of the Prophet sallallahu sallam, then he has succeeded, he

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has made it, he has made it but whoever during his low times, breaks the rules and exceeds the limits. And the sorts of gives up on the guidance of the prophets of salaam this person has lost it and he has destroyed himself. What does this mean? This means basically, during the low times, what you should do is preserve the minimum and that is accepted in Islam. Still do the obligations. I'm going to record double the Allahu Anhu he actually has a statement that explains this then inshallah I'll share with you in the second segment of this hotbar Apollo Holyhead, our stuff for Allah, you were looking for stuff

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and hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa salatu salam ala Sayidina Muhammad in Valhalla, he was so heavy in my bed. So I'm audible bla bla bla Allahu Anhu says in that he had the he NuForce a cabana and what it Bara, he says for these cells on that he had to heal OB for these hearts, there is high times when the heart wants to do more when you want to do more. When you have compassion and motivation.

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What it does well and and there are times when your heart turns away and doesn't feel like doing anything.

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So he explains that kind of high time and low time. That's what Bob has acknowledged. So he says,

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for either acapella for who have been in our field. So when you have this motivation and this passion to do more, you're driven, you have the strong drive, to do more, exert yourself in more voluntary actions because you obviously you've done all the obligations, you want to do more so often more for the sake of Allah. So basically ride that wave. It's a natural wave within yourself, that takes you more to Allah. So do more, do more

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what either at the ballots who have been following, but when the heart turns away and doesn't feel like doing any things, make sure that you stick to the obligations and you'll never fall short of them.

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This explains the Hadith. Basically, it says when you

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During your low times, you cannot push yourself anymore. Make sure you never miss any of the obligations, at least you reach the bare minimum in Islam, you'll never go beyond, you'll never start, you know, missing salah, you don't miss a fast and Ramadan, you don't compromise on an obligation. You don't do something that is haram.

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So that's what it means. So keeping that. So recognizing this pattern in this life and know ourselves is a very key element in how we manage ourselves to remain on the straight path and towards what we call self care. Because when paying attention and being responsive to that nature, is part of self care that I realize I cannot push myself now anymore, because if I do, I might be causing some irreparable damage. And people have pushed themselves so much this these people end up as at extremes. They end up as extremists. As people who go to certain areas where the prophet Salam never instructed is why you have those extremists in Islam in different directions. And in different

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aspects of the religion you find people going into, you know, acts of violence in the name of Islam, acts of tech fear, expelling Muslims out of the realm of Islam, you have people who go to extremes in considering people to be more tidier, and innovators. And you have people who go to extremes in watering down Islam completely. what Islam is no longer has any identity, it's completely watered down. So people go to extremes, when they do not observe this natural flow of this natural pattern in themselves. So they don't manage themselves. They don't take good care of themselves. Another aspect that shows the prophets Allah send them really took care of this, what Abdullah nama Allahu

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Anhu said, he said Kana, Rasulullah sallallahu he was sending me to her willona building.

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The prophets I seldom,

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if you look at his life, around 23 years, being a prophet and a messenger, and look at the Hadith of the Prophet salallahu Salam,

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really, the Prophet did not say much, he did not say much within the span of 23 years, but these words are profound Jalama al Kelim, they have so much wisdom and so much meaning within them. So how was main instruction of the Prophet SAW Salem mainly by example, mainly by example, even look at the prayer of the Prophet SAW Selim. How did he mainly instruct the companions to pray? He said solo come out of a Timon yo Solly pray as you saw me, pray Hajj, the same thing the Prophet and said, What do I need mana seeker come take rituals and the acts of hedge from me by observing me. It's very like exceptional incidents when the Prophet Salam had to explain to someone how to pray

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verbally, directly. So the prophets of salaam will teach the Companions by example, this is why we have a sunnah and fairly Yeah, the acts of the prophets are cinema, huge part of the Sunnah of the Prophet Salam is a description of what he did, or how he behaved in certain situations, not only direct statements, why, because the prophets of salaam knows that these cells, these hearts are not always receptive and ready. So this is why keeping a lot of instruction, giving a lot of instruction to people direct instruction, direct instruction makes people bored.

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Makes people tune out of what you're saying to them. They expect you always to give them instruction and advice and advice and advice, they actually stop taking you seriously.

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So that's why a lot of the guidance in Islam is meant to be transferred by means of example, by means of role models, by means of socializing by means of personal connection, where the person start to pick up with things rub off on others, the good things. And that's why we need to get environments in order to teach our children and help them grow. And this is why parents, we shouldn't be just teaching our kids merely through direct instruction. We shouldn't be role models, we should be examples. And this means we should spend time with them. Because if I'm absent, my kid is not going to learn anything from me. If I'm psychologically and emotionally absent, even when I'm

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at home, I'm not with my kids, my kid is not going to learn from me.

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They're going to spend more time playing video games than the time they spend with their parents.

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They're going to spend more time with other kids in the school and outside more than their parents. So they're going to learn more from these people because these people don't give them direct instructions. A lot of the instruction there is hidden is tacit is indirect. So by means of socialization, they learn a lot. They pick up a lot of the stuff that we don't want the stuff that kills their hearts and ruins their souls.

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So the Prophet saw him recognize this so

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as Abdullah Mossad said, the person I'm used to seek opportunities and or seize opportunities to teach us and give us more ever more either as a reminder, just like the squat bar, or just like Halaqaat

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where there is direct instruction and there is a reminder about Allah subhanaw taala, about this life and about the hereafter. So the prophecy used to seize opportunities, not instruct them all the times when he saw there was a good time to give an advice, he gave that advice, but he wasn't continuously and incessantly just instructing people do this do that don't do this, don't do that it wasn't the case wasn't the person I'm always always educating in that sense. But through his example, through his presence, that was a great part of his teachings. So the point behind this hot bond, the point here is that Islam does done guide us to self care. And self care means basically,

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that as we pay attention to external phenomena, what we see with our eyes, what we hear with our ears, when we touch, and smell and taste, we also have what chicken Islam, Tamia calls a silly button, we have not only external sensory system, we have an internal sensory system. And this sensory system is our feelings. Sometimes you feel you can't take it anymore. Sometimes you feel I can't pray anymore. Like, I don't feel the pride like I prayed to or for like half Tamil lady, and I want to do more, I want to push myself. But something inside me says no, like, I don't feel it, I don't want it, it's getting just too much. You should listen to this.

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Obviously, a lot of us will do away with this thing saying this is shapen. What do you might want to experiment, it could be shaytaan. Yes, it could be shaitan, trying to drag you down. But it could also be that you have just done enough within your capacity.

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And every time you want to push yourself, just push yourself a little bit, just a little bit. This is how you grow a little bit at a time, just small steps ahead every time. So we should always pay attention to whether we find within ourselves some kind of zeal and drive and motivation to do more. And we should use that to do more for the sake of Allah to learn more. But when we find that ourselves want to relax, when it takes some time back, or some time down, we should give ourselves that but it shouldn't take long. Because these are times of recovery. These are times if you're learning now you're figuring out what you've learned in your in your sort of internalizing it. And

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these downtimes are times for rest. They're not wasted time, like imaginal came from and they're just silicon, he says the person should always have a keen sense of what the heart is telling them do I want to go forward or want to take a break. And he says, If you within your breaks remain within the boundaries of Islam and the instructions of Islam, this is not a wasted time you still moving forward, because this is a time of recovery. This is a time of internalizing what you've learned and what you have done. Because you're now preparing yourself to move. So you need to make everything settle in order to move on to the next step. So it is a step forward. Although externally

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on the outside, it seems to be some kind of a time wasted, but it's not. But if you don't pay attention to that is going to backfire. And you won't be able to sustain what you do this why sometimes people who push themselves too hard, what happens to them, they end up leaving everything altogether, or they end up going to extremes. So this is a balance that we have in Islam, it's part of our self care, we should observe it follow this in matters of religion and in matters of life as well. In matters of socialization, doing Oh, a lot of socializing socialization, too much too much. Doing a lot of sacrifice for the sake of people is not healthy, it's not Islamic, when you sacrifice

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yourself just to give more to others. That's not, that's not the case, there is a balance there. The same with your work. The same with even voluntary work you do whatever you do, you should seek that balance, where you have a balance between what you give, and what you get as well because you need to get something in return to help you grow and sustain what you will give. So this is something very important. I believe we have to have an Islam. If you read through the life of the prophet Salam, you see it present there, but you have to have a keen eye to read between the line lines and see this.

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So that was the point in the squat bar. And I think I think each one of us should really take that seriously. It's easy, and it's very helpful. We need this time to help ourselves recover and it's not against, you know, Islam and taking care of ourselves. Sometimes I would withdraw and not give not because I don't want to give but I just want to grow higher. I want to go grow to the next level where I can give more so I need that break. I need sometimes to withdraw the good that I do. So I can do more good. It sounds paradoxical. But that's the reality of life. Allama Philomena, we naturally Muslim a Muslim atta here in Malta Loma Linda the Northern Ireland slough and Alfie

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Emelina with a bit of dominance on alcohol mill caryophyllene caffeine, alarm fildena. Very well. Idina? What do you mean the home Hakuna Halina alarm IBM you had the material knowledge geography article Intel? Luffy Lomasa yedek. Well, you're a mineral

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Phoebe Kitab because from Nigella Zuleika sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, Alon McWhinney them so by fina minimal meaning and if equally McCann olam FMD might have also not all the home wife of Elohim Do you know what Eman Allahumma salli wa salam and abductor what I saw the camera hammered in early he was a happy woman about home BSN and you know your median Subhanallah because I've been hesitant on my cell phone or Salah mo Selena when hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen