Jumuah Khutbah 05-19-17

The Rila

Monastery you know who want to stop Pharaoh who want to study?

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yo, la Koo Baku, man yo Clary La la la sala de force fosun alima. We begin by thanking and praising Allah, the Most Merciful, the most perfect, the most majestic, the Most High.

We seek His guidance we seek his assistance, we seek refuge in Him from the evil within ourselves and from the consequences of our poor choices.

Whomever Allah guides no one can lead us astray and whoever Allah has decreed will be led astray and unclean guide. We bear witness that there is no one worthy of worship except Allah alone.

And we bear witness that Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is his beloved last and final messenger, our beloved messenger, we begged a lot of shower him with Peace and mercy and blessings and his family and his companions, and all those who follow his tradition until the end of time. Before we begin our topic for today, let us remember to have Taqwa of Allah subhana wa Tada. Let us remind one another that Allah is aware of all of our thoughts, statements and actions at all times, and that we should not let the Angel of Death come and meet us except that we are in a state of submitting

to that which is pleasing to Allah.

of the greatest blessings that Allah subhana wa tada has bestowed upon us and they are so plentiful,

is the blessing

of the tongue.

The blessing of being able to speak,

but even greater and more general than that is the blessing of being able to communicate for communication is wider than just using the tongue alone.

Which is why in the beginning of one of the most beloved chapters of Quran to many of us, sort of Roman man, we love hearing the solo recited at the beginning of this chapter of the Quran, Allah says, insane he created the human being he created you and I

are limited by

a lot taught the human being beyond the ability to express oneself the ability to communicate.

That's how we interact with one another through this process of communication,

and a big part of that is our tongue,

the companion rather than a Jebel, inauthentic. Hadeeth

he says that he was with the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam.

They were on a journey.

And in the morning time, this companion came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and he asked him a very sincere and very important question.

He asked the Messenger of Allah, he said,

the call to your Rasulullah Burnie vrma new agenda where you buried him in and now

O Messenger of Allah, could you tell me about something that will grant me entrance into Jenna and push me further away from the Hellfire?

So just simple but profound question. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told him Lacan, Salta and alim.

You've asked about something so serious, so important.

The Prophet sallallahu wasallam then continued to instruct more

about what we know as the five pillars of Islam

to worship none but Allah exclusively to not associate any partners with him.

To establish the salah too fast to do these occur,

perform hajj, these obligatory acts of worship that Allahu Subhana Allah has commanded us to fulfill.

The prophets lie Selim then wanted to summarize the most important issues for him. He told him I will tell you about what I said. I'll tell you about the the summary the most important of all of it

What is it Islam?

your submission to Allah Oh Allah What do you want me to do? Okay, I'll do it. That's Islam

where I moved to la sala and the pillar or the spinal cord or that which holds up your Islam is your soul or your connection with Allah

with your legend, tsunami, Al Jihad and the most prominent aspect is the aspect of jihad

to struggle and to sacrifice.

And then the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told him

shall I not inform you of a way that you would be able to achieve all of this? We talked about some big things here, five pillars of Islam and jihad, big stuff. These are not easy tasks, shall I not give you a practical tip so you can achieve all of this? And said yes, please or messenger of Allah the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

He said he will call called Kufa, Allah kochava grabbed his tongue and he said, Hold this back, restrain this.

You get control over this, you'll be able to do all of those things.

That simple, yet profound guidance from the prophets that along our idea of Silla, may Allah blesses to follow the guidance of our beloved messenger, you know, the companion even Mr. rude. He said something very interesting. You know, in his lifetime of experiences and knowledge and research, he says, Man, I mean, she in a God will be totally absent. And listen.

You know, my years I haven't found anything more worthy of a long term imprisonment than the tongue

should be imprisoned it should be held back.

That's the essence that's how it should be. That's why Allah subhana wa tada created us to have two Jaws, two sets of teeth and two lips and lots of muscles.

To hold back to that one tongue.

Abubakar all the longer and the greatest man that the sun ever rose upon after the prophets and messengers, he used to grab his own tongue and you say ah, hi, Raja Nila worried. You say this is what got me into so much trouble. And that's Abubakar speaking.

How much trouble has this tongue got me into

as we are coming close to the month of Ramadan. And we talked about discipline and restraints and improving ourselves and growing. One of the aspects that is often discussed is controlling the tongue controlling our speech. And

that's very important, but it's a huge topic. There are so many different aspects and facets to controlling our tongue and our speech. And what we say is very important.

And the topic is much bigger than the amount of time that we have together today. Unfortunately, I'm sure you'd like to stay for a very long time.

But we won't do that.

But let us just focus on one aspect of communication.

And that is, you know, oftentimes when we think about protecting the tongue, we think about holding back from saying curse words, or insulting or backbiting, mocking. All of that is valid. All of that is very important that we hold ourselves back from that. And I'm sure we've all heard that reminder before and we should hear it more often as well. We all need it. But there is an aspect of communication that does not involve cursing.

And it does not involve saying any bad words and it does not involve insulting anyone and it does not involve backbiting, none of that.

It involves being sensitive to the one you are speaking to.

Having what they refer to in the topic of emotional intelligence as empathy. putting yourself in that person's shoes, choosing your words carefully, choosing the best possible words what only nasty husana say the best of words. You know, best and even caffeine he says if your own said to me a nice statement of praise, I would say it back to him.

Say Allah doesn't command us to just say good say the best person or the most beautiful of words.

adapting our communication and our method of saying what we want to say or getting the message across so that it is appropriate for the listener.

Because that's what the prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam used to do.

Allah subhanaw taala in the salon

wants us to be very cautious and careful about how we use this blessing. This blessing of speech and of communication.

Mail if you do mean Colin Illa de Yachty bonati The law says not a single sound or a statement that you make will go unrecorded, there is someone there record

It

there's someone there recording it, you know in the famous story in the sea a lot when there was a rumor being spread about the wife of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam many people fell into the trap of just spreading that rumor, even though they were not the origins of that rumor, or they may not have been confirming it, but they were just sharing what they heard. Allah subhanaw taala revealed powerful verses and sought to know what the Buddha who haina well who are in the law here Aleem.

You belittle this

just hearing something and passing it on no big deal. I didn't say anything wrong, no big deal. It's a problem. But Allah says, with Allah, it is great, it is serious.

Oftentimes, it's not that we say something bad, or rude. But it is in the manner of which we say it as one of my teachers used to say, it's not about what you say, it's how you say it.

And that can hurt people.

And if someone is hurt, and they go back, and they complain to Allah, what's going to happen to you and I on the day of judgment? How are we going to respond to that complaint that has been recorded in our record?

You know, we come from particular cultural backgrounds, or specific experiences in life that have shaped how we joke, for example, or the things that we find funny, or the things that are very normal for us to talk about or to ask people about.

We live in a society where people come from a variety of different cultures.

From a wide array of different life experiences, everybody is coming here with their own story.

And so we shouldn't communicate with people thinking they will perceive things exactly as we do, but be sensitive to them.

That's how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam communicated. First of all, he was welcoming us to smile at people. Smiling is one of the forms of charity, cannabis use, and very rarely, he would be seen as angry those times are specific times we can count them on our hands and fingers. Those times when anger was seen otherwise, he had a pleasant demeanor and he welcomed people with a smile.

He used to give his attention to people the profits or send them if somebody was communicating with him, he would turn towards them.

face them.

He never belittled anyone, a young girl would come and grab him by his hand and take him to the further side of Medina. And he wouldn't know what it is exactly that she wants to show him but he would follow. And it might be something so trivial, but he gave her that time. And some may say you are a prophet, you are a messenger, you receive revelation, you're a teacher. You are a leader of the state of this community. You have delegations to meet with you have wives and children you have companions. So much work to do you have time to go follow a little girl. Yes, he made time.

He gave people his attention.

Especially when we live in a day and age where

you know, we call it FaceTime. But really it's our own face. Quite an ironic choice of words, wouldn't you say?

Where our human interaction has become so few and far between and when it does happen? It is of such poor quality. But that's not how the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam was, he spent time with people he recognized what was special about them, and he catered his behavior according to that. He used to stand in front of the companion and say Abu Bakar or him oh my god almighty avocado most Merciful of my own is Abu Bakar. The most intense of the laws of alloys are among the most knowledgeable of inheritances I Li the most knowledgeable head on how long is the one most similar? Teresa is up without? How did he know these characteristics and these dimensions of people's

personality because he gave people time and attention. And he mentioned nice words of praise about them.

I'll give you some examples of things that we've mentioned before nothing new. We've all heard this before in previous culture buzz.

How many times has someone new to Islam come to the masjid and because of the way they were spoken to or the way that they were dealt with, they may never have come back to that mustard again. You think Allah is not going to ask you about that on the day of judgment?

And perhaps they might have left Islam altogether. May Allah protect us all, and grant us steadfastness and guidance.

But sometimes it's that behavior. It's that demeanor.

Certain people have a difficult time getting married, for example. Allah knows what issues they're going through what challenges they are dealing with. And we come to archery, we make them feel bad about it. But maybe they're not giving you their whole life story. These are real complaints. This isn't made up hypothetical situations. these are these are actual

Examples of real life things that have happened in our community here.

Are we speak to someone or we may say something that we think is a joke, no big deal, but it can cause hurt to that person. We have to choose our words carefully. We have to deal with people in a way that makes them feel comfortable. The profits a little harder, send them set with a backhoe, a portion of his leg was exposed. Omar came in he came he stayed in the same manner. But when Earth men entered, he sat up and pulled his gloves down. Isha was perplexed. She said, Why did you not change your position when I'm okay, but I wonder if man came you changed, he said, and I started measuring to Stephanie Meanwhile, America should not have hired from Amanda America from him.

Meaning This is something specific to his personality. Let me adjust my position. So he will be comfortable in my presence. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam always wanted those around him and with him to be comfortable.

So that they can be themselves and so that there can be good quality human interaction, positive communication, you know, the poet, the Wise poet said was a nun was so cool to Salama.

Even

in a gym to add a suku TV, Martina cadena de la mirada can mean Carrie mattina because Sasha Darren babila is wise poet said

forbearance is beautiful, and remaining silent is safety.

So when you do say something, don't be destructive with what you say?

How many times I have regretted I have never regretted staying quiet but how many times I spoke up and then regretted it. And how many words could be just a word or a few?

made the one who uttered them were the one who heard them cry for many, many years.

May Allah subhanaw taala protect us protect our tongues grant us the character of Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam raised our rank and status while collaborating with a comfortable unraveling. Whenever anyone here can be my female it was the Korean hakima automata scenario. But still federal law However, a commonly cited Muslim including the midfirst of Euro in a hula For ye

hamdu Lillah wa

Salatu was Salam ala Mallanna via VEDA

Allahumma salli ala Sayyidina, Muhammad in Africa, Allah Sunni Kenobi me wherever early he also should be here was seldom at the Sleeman kathira.

We are talking about protecting our tongues, protecting our speech, choosing the best possible words, also choosing the best possible possible methods of communication, interacting with people in a way that makes them feel comfortable, and in a way that will not hurt them or cause them any pain.

And this may seem like a bit difficult to achieve. Somebody might hear this and say, Well, you know, I'm only a human being What do you want me to do? I'm supposed to learn about everyone's little inner workings and secrets. That's too much. Or do you want me to just be a hermit not talk to anybody, so I don't hurt anyone's feelings. No, neither this nor that.

But rather a balance

of the ways of attaining good communication. Two things that you can

apply starting today.

You know, in a presentation that was given here in this semester, many years ago, about communication, there was a principle that was given, which is that the point

is not as important or rather the person is more important than the point.

And how many times we have a message that we're trying to get across, or a point that you're trying to make, but in the process of pushing it forward so aggressively, you end up ruining that relationship. How many marriages have come to an end? How many projects have seen failure? How much time and wealth and energy has gone to waste because of our poor communication?

Our poor choice of words of our poor choices of how to get our message across and in the process, we lost that person, we lost that relationship we lost trust.

What kind of a community will we be? If there is not trust between us if there is not love and good communication? That's not a community.

And we're trying to build a solid community here.

So remember that principle that the person is always more important than the point that's why the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says, I promise, a beautiful house in general, for the one who leaves arguing even if they are right, but I'm right. I know you're right. It's okay.

House in general is worth more than you being right.

Your relationship with this person is worth more than you being right.

That's number one. And number two, they say, it is not possible for anyone to attain good communication, and good people skills, except if they spend more time listening than they do speaking.

It's very simple. The more time you spend listening to someone, the more opportunities you have to learn about them, and what matters to them, and what they are struggling with. And then you can cater your speech. And you can't do any of these things without number one, having genuine care and concern.

The prophets that I send them was with the believers all for him, very merciful and gentle. It was not aggressive or harsh, but you have to be merciful and gentle and listen, more than you speak.

And finally, in conclusion,

everything that we have said here today,

and all the etiquettes and add up and manners of good communication did not only apply to communication that takes place in person, face to face, no, but not our imagination restrict this discussion to only that. But any means of communication, whether it is over the phone or over text, or especially nowadays, as we are dealing with this thing called social media, all the adverb of communication apply to social media as well.

Oftentimes, a person just feels they're typing something, they're not actually communicating with a real person. So I can just say something. I can just say whatever's on my mind. I can be hurtful. I don't care what anybody thinks. This is my opinion. I'm entitled to my opinion. No, no, no, no. That's not what Islam says. You are not entitled to your opinion, you are entitled to your opinion, and you are entitled to express your opinion only when it is good and beneficial and positive. If it's not, you are entitled to.

That's why the prophet SAW Selim said McKenna, you'll be lucky to meet Ron Smith. Whoever believes in a lot in the last day, say something good, or stay quiet. Not too many options, nothing to be confused about, say something beneficial, contribute in a positive way, or just stay quiet, then there won't be any room for regret.

Finally, in conclusion, let us remember that this tongue and this ability to express ourselves and communicate is a huge blessing of Allah, there is so much potential for good, you can make someone feel so good with the tiniest and most gentle of words. So let us use this blessing in a way that is pleasing to Allah and not in a way that will earn us the anger of a lot or that will earn us a loss of relationships, and a loss of good strong community bonds between us. Before we close we do have our usual family Friday night program tonight at 8pm. It will be honored to join you all we're talking about what we can do to attain the love of Allah for ourselves. And this Sunday, there is a

cow workshop with Chef Mr. Farmer to cover the importance of as a cat all your FAQs about Zika and how to

pay it how to distribute it etc will be discussed this Sunday from 10am to 1pm. Here at the masjid, everyone is encouraged to attend and benefit from these programs. May Allah subhanho data granted sincerity and successful banality and dounia Hosanna Hosanna wa Pineda now We ask Allah for the best of this life, the best of the Hereafter, and to protect us from the torment of the hellfire. binotto fusina taqwa How is a Kihara and Romans aka a by the law in the law what a big

winner and if you will among kariobangi you will come to Allah. Allah Quran with Kuru la Lima Angelica cocom. remember Allah He will make mention of you wish guru who had any I mean he was he has it can be grateful to Allah He will increase you whether they could Allahu Akbar the remembrance of Allah is the Greatest Allahu Allah momento scenario and Allah is fully aware of what we do.