When Anger Creeps

Mohammad Elshinawy

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Channel: Mohammad Elshinawy

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AI: Summary © The importance of staying silent during busy times, not speaking during prayer, and milk use is discussed. The use of blood for fear of loss and control is emphasized. Jesus experienced feelings of sadness and eventually lost control, leading him to become angry and become upset. The speaker emphasizes the importance of acknowledging anger and not letting it happen, as well as the history of the Prophet sallua alayhi wa sallam's actions.
AI: Transcript ©
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Isn't this isn't Islam after reminding myself I knew the Taqwa of Allah subhanho wa Taala

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and welcoming you all back on another blessed day another blessed Friday in his house, thanking Him for having guided us to this place and guided us to this moment.

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We all know that the best of guidance in all respects is the guidance of the Prophet salAllahu alayhi wasallam.

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Whether we are in good times or in times of difficulty, whether we are pleased whether we are angered

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and with regards to anger, in particular, one of the priceless points of guidance that he turned our attention to some Allahu alayhi wa sallam is the importance of going silent when we become angry. He said Alayhi Salatu was Salam either validly but I do come fell Yes, good. When one of you becomes angry, he must keep silent.

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He must give himself pause, take a deep breath, just don't speak. And of course of the wisdoms of this guided guidance is the fact that you don't want to say something or do something that could possibly be not very fixable.

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And so many times in angry in anger we do and say things that are so hard to fix, sometimes seemingly impossible to fix. But perhaps another great benefit of this guidance of staying silent and taking a deep breath and a step back. When you find anger creeping up on you, is the feeling of anger. You deserve better than to get as angry as often. The believer is supposed to be slow to anger and quick out of it. This is one of the ways to do that. Many times if you give yourself pause, you might realize that there isn't anything at all or not very much to be angry about in the first place.

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You know, similar things remind of one another the Hadith we covered last week of Abu Hurayrah the Allahu Allah and the bowl of milk, there is a very similar Hadith to it.

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Inside Muslim, I'll knock that evening last word of the Allah who answers me and two friends of mine, we reach the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam so exhausted, so fatigued, that our hearing and our sight was gone, meaning we couldn't even see straight we couldn't we were this oriented from the hunger. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam took us home with him to his family to stay beside his house for a while for a few days. And at that time, on that rare occasion, he had three milk goats, goats that could be milked in his possession. So he said to his wives, let us share this milk with our guests.

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So the milk was prepared, extracted from the animals and each was given a share of milk and they all drink.

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And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam would come home at the end of his, you know, arduous labor is day every night and split the milk with us. He says he used to enter and when he would answer he would give Salem in a way that if you were asleep, you wouldn't be awakened. But if you were awake, you could hear him just audible enough a courteous Salam. And then he would enter his mouth, Rob, you would go into his apartment, pray and then come out and drink his share of the milk. And this repeat it. He said and then one night he came home late at night, he salatu salam he didn't come. And we had all drank our share and his share was waiting for him. And so shaytaan came to me

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and look that says and said to me, Listen, what are you waiting for the Prophet sallallahu I didn't set him as late. The unsought of the medina ins must have hosted him. And if they hosted him for sure they were generous with him, they probably fed him a full meal, right? He's not even going to notice that there's milk waiting for him. And if he notices he's not going to want to drink it, he's not going to notice this milk. Just go ahead, you know you're not full. That says, and so I drink his milk. Alan salatu salam. This is very different than the previous Hadith where he's giving milk to people and preferring them over himself. This is him, having given them and they take his share

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as well. Ali, his Salatu was Salam. He said as soon as the milk settled in my stomach shaitan came back and shaytaan always does this and made me regret what I did. And I found myself saying what in the world did you just do that you just drink Muhammad's milk now he's gonna come home not find the milk pick up his hands make do it against you and you're finished duniya laughs era your worldly life and you're here after all done.

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Your ruin shaitan always tells you it's no big deal commit the sin and then as soon as you commit the sin he tells you what it's a huge deal. Don't even try getting forgiven. It's, it's over. May Allah protect us from His snares and his plots and his schemes. He says and I had this little

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Will shirts with me that barely covered my whole body. My two friends went to sleep that night. I couldn't sleep. It was cold and I'm thinking about him coming home. What's gonna happen? Ultimately he came home. He gave his gentle Salem, he entered his room. He's watching him. And then he comes out and he uncovers the canister or the bowl or the jug. And he finds it empty.

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And look, Dad says so he looks up at the skies and he picks up his hands. So I said, Now I am finished. It's over.

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And he said, sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Allahumma alto a man of Imani was slim and Sacani Oh ALLAH feed whoever will give me food in this hour, and give drink to whoever will give me drink in this hour.

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And look that says so I jumped up. And I wrapped myself up with that shirt. And I went for the knife to go slaughter the end of goats because the goats, there's no more milk you don't milk a goat twice in one night. He said and I went over to the goat, I found that it was replete like the other which we just emptied suddenly is filled again. And then I went to all three and all three were full again. This was once again another support and honoring for the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam a miracle that all three of them have been replenished. He says and so I put the knife down. I went I got the milk jug and I filled up the milk jug. And I brought it to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi

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wasallam. And he said to me

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you drink Did you drink? He said, Yeah, rasool Allah you drink. He said, so he drank Ali Salatu was Salam. And then he said to me, how about you? Aren't you going to drink? I said, you drink out on Salalah. And he drank again. And after he drank and he had his fill, I began to laugh so hard that I fell over on the floor.

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Like I was thinking that I'm ruined. And now not only am I not ruined, he made that for me. I like it. Salatu was set up instead of being angry and making against me. Why Why? Why didn't he make dua against him? Why didn't he become angry? Allah He salatu salam, think about it. Someone took something that is rightfully yours. We do this all the time, who took my whatever, right? He's not sure Allah He salatu salam that someone had taken it, right. He's about to be sure. And that is about to tell him the story. I paused in the Hadith. He's not sure. And he's also not sure that he's not gonna have food or drink tonight. Right? He feels in control. By his reliance on Allah. I'm

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asking Allah, it's not over yet. So even if it's not that worth getting angry over anger, by the way, comes from fear of loss. You fear that you're stranded, you fear that you've lost control, you fear that you're desperate. But the believer is humble. Maybe things are not as, as they seem. And the believer is confident he has his trust in Allah subhanho wa taala. I don't have a reason to be angry. Or even if I do, it's not that big of a reason. Let me just focus on finding some food or drink for myself.

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So after he falls on the floor, laughing the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says in the highlight, so as you can see that something's up here, like, why are you laughing? It's so funny. This must be one of your mischiefs like, You're up to something, oh, look at that. And he says, ya rasool Allah, this happened and this happened and I thought that I was going to be doomed. And then you actually made that for me. And he said, This is a mercy from Allah that Allah, you know, gave us two rations of milk from the same goats in the same night. Why didn't you wake up the others to drink with us? He said, Yeah, Rasul Allah, I don't care so long as you got to drink. And I got to

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drink from where you drank. Whoever drinks or doesn't drink after that is irrelevant. It's a nonfactor.

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May Allah subhanho wa Taala give us the character of our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam help us be collected and humble in our anger. Help us be restrained in our moments of tensions help us be of those that are pleasing to Him always slow to becoming enraged quick to coming out of it. Whenever anger does creep up on us. Allahumma Amin Aquila Holyhead, that was the frolla Ali Emily welcome.

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Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam ala Milena via bada Chateau La ilaha illallah wa Hodesh, Eddie Gallagher shadow and Mohammed Abdullah, who whenever you who are sort of coming back to the initial point of the hotbar that moment not with our prophets, Allah Allahu alayhi wa sallam who is perfect in his character and the gold standard that we all measure our actions and our statements by but for normal people like us and you who are climbing up that ladder of trying to ascend that mountain of, of good cloud of good character. What do we do to behave this way? Disarm

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arm your anger by staying silent by holding on taking a deep breath asking the question, what exactly happened here? Have I confirmed it? Why did it happen? Maybe the person is excused. This is priceless advice when you are angered just

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hold off. You know one of the educators speaking about children, she said, once very beautifully, that nine times out of 10 If you get to know the backstory of why this child has disciplinary issues, why this child is misbehaving, you will not be angry, you will be heartbroken. And this is not just children, actually it is adults as well. I remember clearly, reading an article for brother in 2015 is still floating around on the internet. He says I remember my first job as a flower delivery boy, first day on the job just out of college, just wanted to get some money, put some gas in the tank

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until I landed my career position or start climbing on my career path. He said, I went to my first customer and I gave her the flowers. And you know, I had my statements ready. I hope you're having a good day someone's thinking about you something along those lines.

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And how's your day doing, ma'am? And she just coldly said to me, I've been better without a smile anything. And she just took it and closed the door in my face. He's I was so upset. He says like, you know, the she thinks she's better than me. Because I make 750 an hour. This is what he's saying. Is that why?

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He said and and I found that I had another opportunity to get back at her because she had another delivery in the next day or two. So I took the flowers and I'm heading over to her house.

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And she opens the door, same grim face.

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And so I give her the flowers. And I tell her here, sign here. That's it. She signs and I leave.

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And then another opportunity. Another article, I was fed up with her, I was so angry at her, she would open the door, I just basically stuffed the flowers through the door and walk out don't even make eye contact basically.

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He said I was just boiling for days. And this is what I mean when sometimes it's not really worth all of this. He said days later, I'm reading in the local newspaper that there was an accident in this neighborhood where a woman may Allah protect all our children. She found her child in that driveway under the garage door. And the neighbors came and she was with them screaming my baby, my baby and they're all lifting the garage door up. And by the time they pulled the child out it was too late.

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He said so I learned a huge lesson that day. Just take it easy. Give people a break, have some compassion. Some people are probably suffering far greater than we ever realize. Don't get angry. Sometimes when people are angry and trying to contain themselves. We cause them to erupt and then we become counter angry and it starts a vicious cycle. It's not worth it. just tone it down. You know the Prophet salAllahu alayhi wasallam very beautifully. And this is, you know, perfectly justified anger had he expressed it la salatu salam when he came to Medina, you know, they hadn't all become Muslim. A few tribes became Muslim. He would walk around giving Dawa to people still, you know, he

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rode once with Zaid or the Allah Who until they got to a group of people socializing. The narrator says Muslims and Jews and pagans idol worshippers. And when they got there, you know, there's a little bit of dust stirring in the ground from the ground because the animals taking steps. And so Abdullah had no obey. Even he said on the head of the hypocrites. He basically makes a scene he becomes overly dramatic and he makes a scene and he covers his nose and he says you're killing us and don't bring this dust over here and what brought you and and so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam took the higher road, ignored it and began to recite to them some of the Quran to preach to

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them to call them to Allah azza wa jal. Abdullah had no beat again, intervenes and says, Listen, man, there's nothing better than what you're seeing. If it's true. He says it cannot happen. But don't come and interrupt our gatherings with it. You go sit in your house, and whoever wants to hear about this Islam thing will come to you.

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And so the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam took it did not reciprocate calm people down that we're about to get into a brawl because of his brazen disrespect. You know, there's certainly room for anger here. There is room for valid criticism here. But the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam did not act right away at all, actually. But in that moment, he didn't act and he proceeded to the house of sad didn't obey that one of the leaders of El Medina.

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And he says so sad no more. I

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A brother in the privacy of his house, did you hear what he said to me in front of all the people? Did you hear what Abu Bab just said? And he says Abbottabad the father of Bab, which is a way you respect someone, and he did this in private after the man insulted him in public, he was still giving him regard without an audience. And so sad didn't are bad. And this is the point of reference at ya rasool Allah cut him a break. This man was just agreed upon to become the king of Medina. I was and the hustlers the two drives that just became Muslim and believed in you and told you come into Medina to be our leader and unite us from the infighting in the strife and the wars that have

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been happening for years between us will unite under your leadership. They had just said that to Abdullah hidden obey.

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And they were preparing his crown. They were arranging the pearls and the jewels to put on his crown. He was about to be king, until Allah blessed us with you coming to Medina

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and did the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam give him that break he gave him that break and many more after that his thought was set up.

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And so the backstory if you give yourself time to find out it is very helpful. You know when I'm good luck no be insulted. The Prophet SAW Selim so much more. Years later, treacheries. Later, he still when he died, buried Abdullah Hypnobabies in his own shirt, the head of the hypocrites and Omar objected. And some scholars by the way of Islam, interestingly, they said maybe this was because Abdullah had NewBay gave a shirt, donated a shirt to the prophets uncle when he was taken as a captive in the Battle of bed that and so one for one fair is fair. And katabi said no, absolutely not. He did this out of hope, even though the guy was unjustifiably angry, even though the guy was

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just malicious. And all this out of hope that Allah would have mercy on him out of hope that he could work him through his anger work him through his resentment, because there was a backstory.

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And so let us try to operationalize this reminder with everybody in our life. You know, many times they say our children are like this, like if you just knew why they were acting up, they were just desperate for some praise, maybe desperate for some attention, desperate for a sense of security. That's why they got you so angry by lying and so on and so forth. May Allah forgive us all right, for jumping to conclusions, not noticing these things, our spouses, right, just give each other some room the benefit of the doubt, you know, turning on each other all the time with that maybe there's a backstory. Maybe someone had a bad day, maybe someone's having a chemical imbalance. Maybe someone

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was abused at work, maybe and maybe there are many maybes and they're extremely likely. So may Allah azza wa jal help us memorize this this line. When you are angry, be silent, give yourself room, be charitable, be generous, with that comfort of yours with that guard that you have up lower. It's for people, that is part of generosity. And Allah loves those who are generous. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to us in Allah hija Why don't you hate Bill Java, Allah is generous. He loves all those that are generous, meaning every form of generosity may we be worthy of His love. Subhanahu wa Taala May Allah love us

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and make us of those that are loved by those that love Him and loved by those that he loves. And may Allah help us love those that are beloved to him, and love every action that will earn us His love and guidance to the best of character none can guide us to the best of character but him and avert away from us the worst of character and the ugliest of character. None can avert us from it, but him Subhana Allah Allah, Allah Who Medina aliaksandra fluc Laya Delia Ksenia Illa and also with Anessa Yeah, like also before Anessa Yeah, Illa and Allahu Medina. Where have you been? Are gonna hug them and you hit buco, Bakula family already buena Illa Hogback. A gel hooked back. I had baleen I mean

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and Festina one fusina Amina ALMA will bury the Alabama, three la humulene misdemeanor, Philomena and Muslimahs. When we need me nuts, I hear immuno Mohamed Anwar is female Barna well if he moves Alana Warhammer Sultana waffly Dana and even Medini Nyan Maulana wa sallahu wa sallam Guevara, kinda b&m Muhammad wa early he was on the edge nine

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a low IQ but a low IQ