Ramadan Reset – #9 Quranic Transformations – Halima Kurghali

Lauren Booth


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Welcome to Ramadan reset with me Your host Lauren booth. This podcast series is sponsored by what handled org.uk delivering services to Syrians in need. My guest today, her name is Halima Kigali. And she is a Korean lifestyle coach and the founder of Quran rehab, and I really want to hear what is the Quran, lifestyle coach, and all about Quran rehab. She's going to be talking today about transformational moments and goals in Ramadan, also about emotional strength during emotional strength from the Quran. So I'm Monica, I said, I work with a lot, how are you doing? Fine. hamdulillah.

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Tell us a little bit about Quran rehab. Well, for me, hub is an institute that I started, I think about five, six years ago now. And as a lifestyle Coach, what I aim to do is basically to help people to transform their lives through transforming their relationship with a plan, because at the end of the day, there is no one that can coach you I better than a lot of panels either, right? No one that better knows our potential, better knows how to develop our lives and how to transform in each area. And no better way of knowing that and through the plan itself. So it's really about helping people to live a life full of color and lifestyle, which is basically where you try to live

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it, you know, peak performance levels, try to live successfully inshallah, in the next three relationship with a wealth,

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I, my higher education in Islamic Studies, so I've always had that connection with the Quran and things like that. And then I also qualified as a personal development coach. And the reason I did that, because I was so fascinated by the stories in the Quran of these high performing prophets and high performing individuals, pious individuals in the Koran. And then obviously, when we learn about the Syrah as well, you hear all these amazing stories about the Sahaba. And how they were all you know, they fully unleash their potential, and they were serving Islam and doing all these great, amazing things, right. And I really wanted to understand how they think, you know, what is their

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mindsets like, how is it they will be able to be so productive and things like that. So that's why I went into personal development. And then I soon realized the power of love with everything that I learned there, that the Quran to these things in a really profoundly beautiful way. So what I started to do was not only showcase how before, and gives us growth strategies and tools for every area of life, but also to teach people how to develop that deeper friendship with the foreigners law so that they could derive those lessons themselves coping with goals during Ramadan, we all tend to sleep more, or at least we underestimate the amount that it's going to impact us. The day to night

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shift, I compare it a bit to having a newborn baby, if you just go with it, the first the first few days, just go with it. Don't try and enforce anything. Don't try and do it right. Don't kill yourself if you get it wrong, because there's no wrong day as night and night as day just go with the flow. But that's me. Now someone who's a life coach will say, day one, you've got to have your agenda set? Well, I would say that even if you don't, that the thing is a beautiful lesson that I found in the poor and that I kind of live by. And what I tried to live by in my life is this idea that we're taught throughout the program, which is that Allah subhanaw taala. He doesn't necessarily

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call the qualified but he qualifies those that he holds, right. So you have all of these amazing profits, for example, like most Amsterdam, when he's given Prophethood it's not necessarily that he feels ready for it, right? Because he he expresses his fear to go to fit around he he asks how he could deliver the message with a speech impediment, etc. and you find the same with Muhammad Sallallahu sallam, you know, when he was given revelation, and he ran back to Asia and he and she took him to waterfall her cousin, just because you don't feel ready. It doesn't it shouldn't stop you from you know, being as proactive as possible and just trying to just take any moment that you

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can and really grab on to it and make the most of it because like I said, I was pantile and wouldn't necessarily call the qualified he qualifies those he calls so you do your button Allah, Allah inshallah he will put the Baraka in all of your actions. Let's let's just touch upon before we move forward with our transformations in Sharla. And going towards the last 10 days, let's just talk for a moment about some of the struggles that perhaps people who are brothers and sisters who might be lonely are having, you know, the kind of negative spiral of thoughts that can make us groggy and lethargic. Something that I think people misunderstand sometimes when it comes to the fore and with

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regards to like emotional struggles that we have because a lot of people that are struggling at the moment whether it's especially with the whole lockdown and Coronavirus, a lot of people that are either struggling with fear as to you know from the uncertainty or they're feeling isolated so they're feeling sad. So we have all these emotional struggles on top of all the fatigue of Ramadan fasting and you know, extra prayers and less sleep etc. And I think that's so powerful if you one thing that kind of holds people back from maybe you

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Interacting more with the court can actually be a source of positive energy for us it can be a source of emotional healing is because a lot of people that have these ideas that they throw around in our community I think sadly to our own detriment, which is you know, beliefs like you know, sadness and depression it's a sign of low a man, or you know, if you feel anxiety or fear, for example, is a lack of trust and to work on Allah subhanho, wa Taala. And all these kind of things where our emotions are tied to a negative spiritual standing with a las panatela. And this is not the case if you look in the Quran, we find that it's okay to feel these emotions, right? We're just

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human beings and they're just part and parcel of being human. So for example, you look in the Quran and you see iacobelli salaam, expressing his sadness and his grief over his departure with usip. You see, Mousavi said I'm consistently mentioning his fear of going to follow the fear that he's always experiencing. You find Miriam alayhis, salaam feeling anguish and an almost despair, she gives birth, Teresa said herself. So you find all of these examples of people who have perfected that Eman with a loss pantalla yet still experienced deep, more intense emotions. So that if that is yourself, and I would say you know, it's not necessarily about waking up for each night feeling super, super

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powerful, because even healing is a form of progress in itself. So wherever you are on the spectrum, whether you have had an amazing Ramadan, and you just really want to pull up your socks or you're someone who's really struggling and just trying to survive throughout this month, you know, the plan is for everyone. And the plan is there to help you with your emotional healing and to give you as much positivity as possible. So Pamela, how did you come to Islam? Six, I don't know your story. Oh, I was actually born Muslim. Ah, yeah, it My mother is a Scottish River. So my mother okay. Yeah, so that was before. Obviously we were born and before she met my dad and marijan good old mom. See, I

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love to hear about reverb moms. You know what it really touches my heart because then you have give hope for the next generation, don't you? Yeah.

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Where did Where did you feel that you fit it fit in then what was it like growing up as a Scottish revert and your father's from which community? And he's Arab. He's from Libya. Okay, I fitted in either to be honest.

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There was a group of us that actually were all the mothers were English, or Scottish or Welsh Irish. And the fathers were all Libyan. So there were record us on our keys. So we had some type of connection with them. But in terms of the wider community, to be honest with you, I didn't I didn't feel Scottish enough with the Scottish I didn't feel loving enough with the Libyan but I found it I think one really positive thing that came out as a child of

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where my mother is a river hamdulillah I think I learned Islam kind of unfiltered, a little bit less.

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unfiltered, where I've actually got to remove a lot of the cultural aspects that I think some people they struggle with, and they kind of clashed with Islam. So hamdulillah I definitely think that was a big plus. Did you have any resistance to it? As somebody of you know, you have Scottish grandparents? Did they at any point say to you don't have to do this? Was there any tooing and froing? Or had they accepted by that point? The point that we were all born me and my siblings, I think it's just a mutual respect. They were actually they're really respectful. So when they come to Scotland, they'll try to you know, make Hello neat for us and things like that. Or when they come

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down, my mom would drive to the church or whatnot. So it is a very respectful kind of relationship that they have humbler? I think obviously, when my mom first converted, they were a little bit unsure because there was absolutely no Muslims at all in my mom's city.

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And they had the slam was very, very foreign. But I'm delighted I think now it's it's just mutual respect. Mashallah, Mashallah. And transformational Lee wise, we're now on the on the final part of this beautiful Ramadan journey subpanel our brothers and sisters I don't know about you but some of the some of the goals i've i've had to put to one side and I went for the Ramadan legacy, a wonderful folder a wonderful diary of things to do know it knowing see, okay, you plan to fail. You see, she as a life coach, as you probably know, you went in with the wrong attitude misspoke.

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But But knowing I wasn't gonna be hard on myself if I didn't achieve them because things always come up in Ramadan. And at the end of the day, we have to work and that's reality too, but with an absolute overflowing love for the evenings. What can we take from the remainder of this time? That that isn't to do with goals, but there's really transformational and will link us to the Quran Do you think each other regardless of where we are, I think that if we really want to

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To try to experience positive transformation, this trauma bond, I think it doesn't take very much other than looking at the very purpose of trauma by itself. And just going back and re aligning ourselves with that, because I know we've become very, very focused on fasting because I think fasting is one of those,

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those forms of a banner that really stand out right, it's very visible. So it affects our sleeping habits, our eating habits, our energy levels, so it's natural that a lot of our conversation revolves around fasting, but so upon likely interestingly, if you actually look into the Quran, Allah subhanaw taala when he speaks about fasting, and when he speaks about Ramadan itself, he speaks of them distinctly. So with regards to passing a Lost Planet, Allah tells us that the purpose of fasting is to develop taqwa. Whereas the purpose of Ramadan itself, the verse well as pantallas specifically talks about Ramadan, he says, Ramadan is the month in which the poor are sent down. So

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what actually makes them avant special is the forum itself. And really interestingly about that verse is that Allah subhanaw taala. In Arabic, he removes himself from the act of doing so inhale, Allah doesn't say that Allah, you know, Ramadan is the month in which Allah sent down the Quran, it just said, the month in which the AMA sat down, which in Arabic, basically the the context in which is written, it should suggest to us that for ourselves, the purpose of Ramadan should be for us to rediscover Allah, subhanaw taala for ourselves all over again, through reconnecting with before and in ways we never have before. And that's just because of the transformational nature of the plan

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itself. So I would say to everybody, you know, when people think about going into the last 10 days, they think I just have to do more, right? So I need to read more and more, I need to listen to it more, I need to study it, these things are great, right to increase the quantity, but I would actually challenge people to increase the quality, I would ask, you know, challenge people to just over the next 24 hours, take one hour, half an hour, 10 minutes, whatever it is, you have, sit with a pen and paper, and just journal for a moment, go away by yourself somewhere quiet, quiet, maybe you've got a nice, quiet, lovely area in your home or your garden or whatnot. And just ask your

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heart, ask your soul, you know, what does my heart and soul really need from the right now? What is it that would bring me the greatest source of joy and benefits in my personal life, because that is the purpose of the poor and it's supposed to transform transform, you and I who are completely different people, right? We're at different stages of our lives, we come from different backgrounds, yet the miracle of it is that it can impact and transform us all. And that really comes down to really seeking out why and how it goes. So ask yourself, you know, is it more connection that you need to look for? And is it more emotional intimacy and substance with the four and is it you want

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more meaningful interactions with more joy and ease is it that you need it to transform certain aspects of your life, really kind of explore your plan heart goals as much as you can. And I would say seek those out in the remaining days of Ramadan because these needs of our hearts are actually what's going to transform your relationship with prayer and to actually become a friendship, you know, long term so that after this 30 days of Ramadan, you still have that consistent with a love for that. Somebody told me that. A really great way to connect with the Qur'an is that when Allah to Allah speaks about the believers, so a you, you are Lavina Ave, oh, you will have believed and then

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says and you'll be rewarded with such and such, make it a duar make it apply directly to us. So when Allah speaks positively about the believers and about those who go to Jenna, you know, you can stop reading so a lot let me be of those people all on let me be of those people feel it, feel the resonance of not people gone past but you right now being connected to Allah to Allah through His Divine Word. Subhana Allah and then when the people of jahannam have spoken about, oh, the man Africa and other must record those who have disbelieved those who are you know, going to be dragged on if at all, please, don't let me be one of those place. People please spare me from that place,

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please. Your Allah, I'm really pleased. And that way, you know, it really lifts it back into our heart. That's absolutely amazing. Tip. Yeah, definitely. I like what you said sister about increasing the quality, not just the quantity. What's the doing of that? Okay, well, what I usually do is I and we have a kind of teach a simple four step process, to help people to achieve those 4am heart goals. Because at the end of the day, you know, a lot of times Allah says in the Quran that he has placed a bet everywhere, right? So the trees outside in the mountains have as in them ourselves have as nosleep has as an area that they obviously have a very vast meaning to it. But essentially,

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it's something that that cools you something that that awakens you something that interests you something that takes you back to Allah subhanaw taala. So if we look around us

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in the world today, and we look at friendships that we have with people, right? So we see some people we have really deep friendships with, we have very deep connections, we feel a relevance to them. We feel emotional intimacy in our relationships with them and friendships, where some people are merely just acquaintances, right? Or some people even have a dislike for so. So kind of like we were just to look at the A yet in the friendships that we human beings have with each other, we'll see that naturally, that there's a progression, there's certain phases that we go through in order to develop that friendship, it doesn't just happen overnight. So if we apply those phases with our

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relationship with them, we can find ourselves building that type of friendship as well in awkward and relationships itself. But it primarily starts with asking yourself, what is it about which aspects of friendships are very dynamic. So by asking yourself, which aspects of my friendship Do I really need to build this form of on so so for example, some people might be at the beginning stage, and they just need to feel that connection, they just want to feel like Allah subhanaw taala, when they read the four, and he's talking to them personally, or some people might feel like they want to feel a las pantallas profuse love for them through the plan, or that they want to feel moved inside.

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Some people want to go to the bar and not feel like it's a chore, or it's difficult, they want to find a joy and a meaning, you know, meaningfulness to it. So it's really about identifying when you are in your friendship with the poor and to begin with, and really look at how a friendship actually develops.

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And really try to buy that. So for me, I know that I teach this in over 15 hours training, by the way, so it's going to be very difficult for me to just summarize it here. But to give you a very quick summary, I would say this four step process is to realize that you can't live up for an lifestyle. So whether for an is part and parcel of your everyday life, without living with it daily, so building that habit, finding the time for it, finding the the ease, and the meaningfulness of the quality. And you can't do that without loving for an hour. And you can't love for analysis, you know, the plan. So this is the four step formula to really know about the Quran. I want to say no, I

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don't mean, we start by seeing how many sources it have. Is this a madonie? Or a, a makansutra? or things like that it's more about knowing the very fundamental nature as a miracle. Hello, do you experience it as the greatest miracle of Allah subhanaw taala? Does it move you that way. So I would say this is the first step in building a friendship with the person. And once you do that, you're naturally going to develop positive feelings for it. So this is where you start building a love for the poor. And then once you start learning how to practically love the poor, and then it becomes easy for it to become part of your daily life, it becomes easy to make the time for it, and to start

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personalizing your interactions with it. And then once you do that, it's much more easier for the poor and to start transforming different areas of your life.

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At the end of the day, last month, he does everything with wisdom. And he selected Arabic, right. It's like they say, you know, there's a saying that quote where it says, you know, if somebody sent you a love letter in a language, you didn't understand what lengths would you go to translate that and to understand what it's saying, you would make that effort, right? Because this is somebody you love to the same case that we should make an effort to learn Arabic for sure. because number one that's going to help you to understand it better. Like I said, Allah pantalla talk of the miracle is the Quranic language is what was made many, many linguistic miracles in the poor, and you can't

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really appreciate from the English translation. But saying that, that doesn't mean you know, the poor animals for everyone, Arab and non Arab alike. And this is why I said to people, you know, the fact that people struggle, and they think that they have to study Arabic in order to get their heart goals. That's the mistake that people make, just by achieving your academics is of the Quranic sciences mean, you automatically in and of itself, achieve those goals and you don't have to be an Arab speaker to achieve them. And that's something that I advocate for and we have a lot because I've actually coached people who have memorized the entire plan cover to cover and they are

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beautiful to our muscle, a lot of watercolor that they can find, they don't feel an emotional connection with it. Or people who have studied the Quran, Mashallah to very high academic levels that have confided in me and told me, You know, I don't really feel its relevance to my life. So it goes to show you that the heart and the mind and emphasizes this so much throughout these pages that the heart and mind are two separate entities and we have neither

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of our minds and needs of our hearts and our culture at the moment, sadly, it focuses a lot more on the academic sciences and feeding the intellect of the mind. And like I said, this is not a bad thing, because we need to understand the world around us and, and understand the hereafter and learn all the sciences or, you know, to read in Arabic and tafsir. And, and heaven are normal for and is a really important and that part of our relationship, but they do not have in and of themselves, feed the needs of our hearts directly. So this is something that Allah Subhana Allah, He makes it clear to us that they're two separate entities with two different needs. And so I think it's really

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important as well. And I'd like to see a bit of a shift in our culture and culture and short one, that's what I'm hoping for, and rehab will contribute to in the lab is the shift in opera and culture where it becomes more balanced, and you start really thinking about fulfilling the needs of our hearts as well. Because when we don't have those needs of our hearts felt, you'll find a lot of people begin to question whether they can find it in this religion, right, and you find people leaving Islam because they we need this naturally, to have this emotional connection, this relevance, all of these things that I said, identified as rare and how it goes, we need them from a

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lot pantalla, three to four. I've heard it described like this, and that and it really resonates that you can of course, Allah makes access to his word in your own language. And there are there should be hotbar in your own language happening that will explain aspects every German every Friday. And of course, there'll be talks in your own language in your own Masjid, and online. But as long as we stay distance from the call, and then it's a bit like snorkeling now snorkeling, you just float on the water, it's beautiful, you feel good. And you can see down below, there's so much going on, and you're on the top of the water. But when you learn Arabic, when you really get to know and that

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each word in the Holy Quran has 6789 more depths of meaning than it does in our own translation, which is somebody's idea of what it's supposed to look like. So it's at one removed from the divine book. So we're also we're at a distance we're in the next room, guys. That's the truth of it. And what we want to do is scuba dive in Charlotte, if we get the chance, all of us make the door Oh Allah while I'm living in this dunya let me know your book, as you reveal, as you had it revealed to the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him, let us let us get that closeness because then we can feel close to you and change ourselves and be better and be loved, you know, and feel that love So, so

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scuba diving is when you go deep into the water and you're surrounded on all sides and you're in a whole a whole new world. That's how it's described by people who know, the Quran in its original. When I said that, obviously you can achieve for ad hoc goals, I'm only just trying to, to emphasize to people because I know a lot of people when they're starting out in their own relationship, and they struggle with the Arabic language because it can be quite complex for some people that have this heart and they just think that you know, maybe this is not meant for them or whatnot. And the case is that it's just a matter of encouraging you know, like I said with the heart and the mind the

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last pantalla he connects them but he says they're separate entities so we need to feed both inshallah on every page there is something that's talking to me today and to you today. So it's it's divinely put together. But what really is striking me this rabbit down on the door. So Pamela Talk to us a bit about the doors and and how to connect with those in charge? Well, I think the beautiful thing about the lies in the problem is the fact that they're coming from they're not just do as I was fantastic placement most of them are actually do as made by the best of creation, the MBA and the righteous souls. So what we find is that, you know, as human beings, we all need role models,

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right, as part of our genetic makeup, we need people to connect to people to aspire to be like. And interestingly, almost half of the entire forum just consists of stories and stories of the past. And they primarily deal with, like I said, the righteous souls and the ambia. And our last panel tally, he calls them Asana offers the best of stories, because they deal with the best of creation. So when we look at their lives, and we we see, you know, detailed for us all the different struggles that they went through all the different, different situations they found themselves in and how they consistently tend to have lost talent, whether that was making drought because of their health, or

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because of their children, or because of the enemies that they face, or because of the slander or whatever it might be. And we see all of these different types of data and then pulling on a lot of data and how well what kind of Allah, he responds. It's phenomenal. And I will say that my favorite set of verses with regards to this when there's hardship and then pulling out a lot if you look at the end of sort of MBs self was fantastic. He's mentioning each individually, like many, many profits and the struggles that they faced with and how they turned back to Allah Clinton and they making these choices.

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And Allah immediately after each verse immediately before mentioning the next Prophet, who mentioned how he addressed that need of that of that province of Panama. So it's just very, very profound. And the fact that it's through human beings like ourselves, rather than stating different dyes, it gives a different dimension to as well because like I said, we need role models, right. So the fact they come from human beings who went through struggles and we can connect to in our own personal life, it just paves the way to make things easier, right? It paves the way to show us that drama is the key, because the Quran itself is a way for a las panatela to talk to us. But that is a way for us to

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talk. So I want to use these Quranic ayat. And this one really touches my heart because our Lord, let not our hearts deviate from the truth. After you've guided us Subhanallah I don't know which of the which of the MBL would have would have asked for that, or the, you know, needed to get the people to have his people to ask for that. So Pamela, the but that for me, as, as someone who, you know, was not long ago, was absolutely ignorant about Islam, about the truth about the reality I was reading sobre el Hajj today. And Allah to Allah says, because I am the reality several times in that one surah because I am the reality, the rest of this is only a reflection of our last reality.

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Because without Allah there is no reality. take that on board, if we can take that on board Bismillah to Allah, when we pick up the Holy Quran, that none of this exists without Allah.

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Right? Allahu Akbar, and that he has chosen for us this day to pray. We've been given this gift we woke up this morning, and it was Ramadan.

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And this is why we always cry at the end of Ramadan rites and Pamela have been because we don't want it to go because we know we were chosen to have that one. And with time, like COVID, sort of have a lot of them with hundreds of 1000s being hospitalized and 10s of 1000s dying, and people that we know having lost parents, they they have been chosen to go to the next realm. But we have been chosen to wake up for or stay awake for fragile this morning. Our Lord impose not on us that which we have not the strength to bear, grant us forgiveness and have mercy on us. You are our protector, help us against those who deny the truth. You know, the thing about Quranic dwellers brothers and

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sisters is their multi layered and multifaceted it's it's never just one thing. It's not just Janice alpha DOS, it's don't impose that which we can't bear. Let us be able to cope with whatever this dunya throws at us. Grant us forgiveness God, that's huge. You know, I've really messed up again and again. But grant, have mercy on us. Please, please let us into Jana. Please. Let us center Jana, you are our protected, calling our law by one of his names help us against those who deny the truth. Right? Everything's coming at us. All of you know, anytime we put out something positive on the internet, off it goes again, so tantalizing are closing thoughts. closing off from what you said

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yourself about the power of God is

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phenomenal when you look at the guys, because first human beings you know, we make God the things that we want things that we think are good for us when there's the dads not for and they just remind us how limited we are that there are things that are good for us that we don't even know that are good for us. There are things that we we sometimes forget to make the app or that we know that are good for us, but we simply forget because we're human beings. So it really does just extend your scope of understanding a bit more. And it really just humbles you just puts you back into your place of I am deserving of Las pantallas My Lord. And this is what's so amazing about about Ramadan, and

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that is the fact that we get to be engaged with the Quran. And the Quran itself is the best means of attaining a connection with Allah, tala. And that's what is ultimately all about. It's about revolutionising our relationship with Allah subhanaw taala through engaging with the poor and in ways that we never expected that we've never done before. As we move forward, I think first and foremost, just, you know, forgive yourself. You know, we asked the last panels Allah to forgive us all the time, but sometimes we don't forgive ourselves. And what actually holds us back is our own regrets and our own guilts that we carry forward. So a lot of us may be feel like you know, what is

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18 days already pause. I didn't do X, Y and Zed or I could have done better and these things are only going to weigh us down moving forward in order to sprint and run. You're going to have to unload the burden, right. So now moving forward, I definitely say to people, you know, we're in those days seeking forgiveness, ask

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for them. So start by forgiving yourself.

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To give yourself what you haven't done, Allah gave me another

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another remaining amount of days.

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Like I said, just when you're moving forward now and you're focusing on your relationship, or just personalize it as much as possible, I love Samantha, He created us all so differently. And you know, this is even reflected in the fact that I was Clinton on the Day of Judgment. You know, we have that heartbeat that some people will enter through the gate of charity. Some people enter the Apollo or hedge of forgiving people, why are we told these things because all of us are different, right? There's certain forms of a bear that we find easier, and whatnot. And the fact that I lost my father, he created us all different. He said, there's a beauty in it. It's also to facilitate as

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well. So with the poor and the poor and can facilitate for all of us, we shouldn't try to limit the transformation before and commit to our own lives. Thank you so much for that system, Allah to Allah bless you. If you've enjoyed this podcast, please take a moment to visit or tandoor or book UK to support Syrians in need.