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Teaching your children to learn Quran and build a strong Islamic identity

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Haleh Banani

Channel: Haleh Banani

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Episode Transcript

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One of the most important things that you can do as a parent is instill the love of Islam and the love of the Quran in your children. You know, our goal was not simply to get our children to memorize or on, we want it to them to have a very deep connection and to feel that sense of having a strong Islamic identity. And I have a special guest and my mission first of all is to teach parents how to instill the slob and my very special guest is my son keti Mira baby, and he is Mashallah 18 years old, he memorized the Koran Mashallah Tabata Kala last year, and he is now on a mission to carry the torch and to to help children have this connection to build the Islamic identity. So,

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welcome kitty. So Aleykum Mama,

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we need to get to hold on a second. It's so nice to have you here heading on here. Mashallah. So you're now 18 and you're studying? What is it that you're studying? Now? The law I'm studying biomedical engineering in sha Allah, my goal is to become at the forefront of the prosthetic scene. And you know, just do a lot of families that Mashallah, that's wonderful. Now, tell us a little bit about your whole your experience of of memorizing the Koran what, you know, what was that? Like? Oh, you know, how did you guys found a great sale, Chef Muhammad Hamza, we must Allah He, he was amazing. First of all, he was super encouraging. He was an even though like, you know, he's Egyptian

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and he's older, right? He was he didn't like teach in the traditional Sauer was like threatening and discouraging and all that stuff. He taught, you know, with love and compassion. And, you know, I saw that sometimes he would get up after like, I memorize like a certain amount we'd get up when we played like foosball together or something. And I gotta tell you that your mom had little something to do with that.

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I had a talk with him, he is an amazing man. Mashallah, may Allah reward him. And I just, I had a talk and Baba and I had a talk with him and said, we only want to use positive reinforcement, we want it to be a very pleasant experience, because there is the traditional way of teaching and, and you know, and we just wanted it to be all like a very pleasant experience. I'm so glad that

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and it was a cool show, he would write on his like the

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motorcycle and

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leather jacket.

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Mashallah, so how important do you think that it is for the youth right now to have a strong Islamic identity? Well, it's, it's crucial actually, like, a lot. I see a lot of people, a lot of people that I know that go to that went to Islamic schools and grew up in a religious household. And the second they go into college, the second they have this freedom to paddle a lot you like, they go down a very different path than you'd expect. And it's all because they don't have that strong Islamic identity. They're not confident in their religion, they're not confident, you know, being different standing out from the crowd. So you know, they they go and they make mistakes, they have

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fun, and you know, they do things that they can't take back. So how do I support a lot, and it really has to do when you're, when you're, when you have that strong Islamic identity. It's not so much about you, you don't care about like necessarily fitting in You are God conscious, you want to do the right things. Exactly. Like you, you realize the importance of holding on to Islam, you know, and making sure it becomes like a guiding light for you making sure that everything that you're doing is to please Allah and to follow Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and it's just, it's without that, you know, you you make so many mistakes. That's true. So it's about having that sense

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of confidence and also being a leader, right? Because you need to feel like I can stand out and something your grandma my mom would always say is, you know, being different is a is a good thing, right? You don't necessarily have to just blend right in and out for the right reasons. Right.

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So how do you feel like that the knowledge of the Quran has helped you How has it been a guiding principle for you? Well, you know, some how to love

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You know, understanding the poor and just took took my Semak identity to a whole nother level. Because, you know, you see a father that you know, you tell me about them like you see a fall go completely astray that leave the dean that hates them. And it's because they don't truly understand it and understanding the court and ended up doing for me is made me secure in my beliefs. How do you know I would go in Uber rides or you know, whenever I couldn't get rides from driving? Yeah, I couldn't drive myself for those 10 hour week prayers.

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I Uber everywhere, right. And I would talk to driver after driver and like the conversation would eventually lead to them. And they would say something like, you know, in the end, we're not really sure who's right. And I can confidently say, I know what is right. Because I, you look at the miracles in the quarter, and you look at how its worded, how beautiful everything is and how there is no imperfection, no matter how hard you try to search for one. Uh, you know, it makes you not have a single doubt in your mind. Mashallah Tabata Cola, that's so critical. Because if you are, if you're not strong in your faith, if you're shaky, then you can be pulled in any direction. So what I

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want to hear is, how are you carrying the torch? What do you what is it that you want to do you country? Because I've always said add value, right? Yeah.

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Every time after school, right, was good about today, what was bad about today? And how did you add value? Yeah. How did you add valuable correction? I wouldn't say what's bad about it? Was there anything not so great? Yeah.

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But and then I would say, how did you add value? So I want to know, how are you adding value to the to the community? What is it that what what is it that you're offering? Well, you know, I'm the law, I'm offering online and in person called an sessions, to teach the future leaders of our oma the, at some point and Islamic Studies, and, you know, to overall be like an older brother to them, and help help inspire them. And, you know, try try and do a role model. So I think that is wonderful. And you've already done this, you've been doing this now for the past year, you're with Tell me a little bit about the experience that you you have, and how did you It's an amazing experience, I have this

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this one amazing family, Mashallah their children, they, they already had a connection to the dean when, when I first came, and they were telling me they were worried when I was going to come, they're going to have a old, you know, traditional script, Fresh Off the Boat.

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Not nothing wrong with them. But you know, with younger kids, they're their ages. Like, when I first started working with them, they were nine and 11. So they were worried about that they saw me walking in and they were so excited. And you know, what, every day when I come to their doorstep, I'd see them running to the door, they have a little baby sister to that be like, brother, can

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you build that connection, you build rapport, you made them relax, because really, I mean, if we talk about the psychology behind learning, effectively, you really have to be relaxed, you have to be happy. And when you are when you are happy, then that's when your mind can really absorb the material. When you are fearful when you feel like oh my gosh, I'm going to be punished and there's going to be negative. I mean, that's just that shuts down the mind. So I'm so glad that you So what kind of approach Do you use when you're teaching the kids? Well, like I said earlier, I, you know, I try and be like an older brother to them. I, you know, I start off the classes, not by saying,

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alright, let's get to work. I start off the classes by asking them about their day, their weekend, you know, things that they're interested in, introducing them to like books and it's actually have a student right now that just finished an entire book series just because I recommended it wasn't even something that necessarily was expected of you, but you encouraged them to Yeah, read more.

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And, you know, doing that and being able to bond over, you know, just their everyday activities that makes them excited to come and talk to me.

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friend and a friend and a big brother and it's just, it's very, it's very rewarding whenever they're excited to come and learn.

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Because I know they're not here just for the quarter an hour younger, it's hard to just be there for the end there to hang out with me. And then the end comes along and

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they're more receptive Oh important to create a positive association to the whole process. Someone is asking, Is this my son? Yes, he is.

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This is my second son. Mashallah Tabata Kala Kadeem, and and now you're offering some online, online classes, right, you're doing in person. And, and now since you know, COVID you're doing online? Tell us a little bit more about that. Yeah, so we just we get in a zoom call every day we follow a schedule, and know what happens. I'm still able to keep that connection. It's obviously a little bit more different. Because you know, we're not right there face to face. And

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you know, if kids kids aren't used to like being on the screen, maybe they're, it's a little bit harder to be for them to be receptive. But 100 let you know with you know, with my positive attitude, like what I do is I

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I do this thing anytime they like memorize an idea or like they say the job correctly or something like that, I'll put my hand up to the camera, they put the head up to the camera and give my clients

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but you know, something to address about the online you know, some people will tell me Oh, I want to do it in person with you and, and I said, you know, what is just as effective, you don't have to be in person, you can have your reach to the whole world and you can help anyone. And it's just it's exactly the same thing. The sense of like, what the information that is passed on so I'm really excited for you that you're doing this and we have Antti Suzanne Mashallah witnesses beautiful upbringing and implementation of everything that is being spoken about May Allah bless and protect you heavy bkt

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you continue to be an inspiration for us and everyone around you. I love the joy you bring to everyone you encounter. Mashallah, just like a Lafayette. And that's so sweet. Well, it is it's, you know, it's wonderful. I'm proud of you for what you're doing. And I do want to definitely encourage everyone who wants their, you know, you want to have your kids learn that we're on but in a positive way, right. Because, sadly enough, I have a lot of clients who come to me that have had some negative experiences, unfortunately, either. It's strychnos, either, there are other things that happen. And you know, a negative experience and learning that we're on from someone can totally turn

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a person off from the dean. I mean, and so it's so critical to choose someone who is going to use a positive approach, who is going to be encouraging. So this is wonderful. Let me know if you guys have any questions for Kadeem? Well, you know, the dream.

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Dream? Yeah, what are you gonna say? You know, like, it is it's zero risk, right? Because like I do, I do a first free session, you know, right, if it doesn't work, because, you know, some students have different learning styles. Some, you know, I don't want you guys to, you know, spend time on me if it's not being effective. So we have our first free session, we see how it works. We see if the, the kids love it, you know? And if it and if you guys are happy with it and install if you are then No, we just continue working together. So you're having that one free trial for the for the parents, try it out, see if your kids connect their learning. Well, I think that is that's great. And what is

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how do they How do they sign up for this? How do they sign up for this? Well, hamdulillah I have a website. I don't have a website.

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I now have a website. I don't know, is it gonna like is there like a place where I think we are posting it now? Right now. So one sister Sister Nancy is saying how do we sign up and here we go. So this is the link and you know, we just want to help this. The oma we want to help instill the love of learning the love and building a strong Islamic identity because that is going to be a way that you can help your kids withstand temptation. Yeah, protect them from you know, just going astray. They need to be proud of who they are. Yeah.

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All right, any any other questions, Kitty and can my son join your class?

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By shoot, if you go to his website that was just posted, you can sign up to take the classes you can sign up for the first a free, free class, and then you can see how it works out and then sign up for more classes. inshallah. Let's see Hello from Lake View area of Chicago. Well, good. It's nice to have you here. Thank you, Kenny. And how fun to do to you, Mama.

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Yeah, it was nice and we can, you know, we can do you know more more sessions like this and you can share maybe some of your insights, some things that help you, if you were to give advice to first let's give an advice to the parents as far as like those who really want to pump up their kids about the dean, what would you What would you tell them? Well, you're the expert on this, but I'm gonna, I'm gonna try

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to pump your kids up for the dean, you have to, you know, Mashallah, you did an amazing job at this moment. And really, I owe it all, to you, I owe everything that I'm doing to you and your efforts and hamdulillah like,

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thank you, I'm

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really, really, it's been amazing. And the main thing that, you know, encouraged me to love the Quran and love Islam is, you know, just the constant, the constant positive association, right? When we would finish the law, what would we do immediately after we'd get a read going for?

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You know,

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when I would recite, you'd have the women and family gatherings, you'd have me like, recite, you know,

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like, the first part of Sudoku Rockman

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encourage you to build that celebrate and lead. Yeah, I would have you always like be the mom, you know, yeah, you'd be mad when I was like seven or eight.

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Right? You know, it's the constant positive association with a dean that really influenced me how to be to love Islam and the Quran. And I think for any parents that, that you know, what one takeaway that I would take from this amazing, you know,

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the amazing, like, chance of being raised by you,

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is, um, is the positive association that really works. It really helps. It's really effective. Excellent. At this, okay, sister, Nadia. So I'm on a call saying, how often are the lessons and how long are the lessons. So a right way, depending on like, what your availability is, right now, I have a family that we work five times a week for an hour, 30 minutes each student.

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I also have a family that I work with 30 minutes, two times a week. So it's according to your availability, I usually do around 30 minutes per student, because once it starts going over, that they start to pay attention, they're not going to retain the information. So yeah, I usually do 30 minutes a student. So that's like four legs, and how often in the week is just know how available you are. Okay. And sister Suja is saying, Are there age groups or age limits? So, I mean, I generally would put, like, the age limits at like, I wouldn't teach below five, even five is kinda young.

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Cuz, you know, it's a lot. It's, it's not really where I thrive. And you know, I thrive in teaching students from ages like eight to, I'd say, like, 14, I obviously can go higher or lower. And I will give that give it a try. Right now. I'm teaching a couple of five year olds, so and that's going great. But it's, it's

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five and older. Oh, yeah. Five minutes. Let's see. This is any lessons for kids to build confidence and self esteem in Islamic manner? places to sign up for classes such as above?

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What is that to build to build confidence and self esteem This is something that happens from very early on from very early on, not belittling the kids not named calling, not making them feel ashamed, you know, giving respect and honoring them, right. There's a lot that can be done in building the self esteem and that that in itself, I could go on for an hour on that one.

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But for now, we're gonna keep that and we have. Let's see, sister semina sings upon Allah even we are crying sister Holly and we have Auntie Shireen on here

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Mashallah awesome mother and amazing son Love you too so much. We love you as well, Mashallah. And someone else was asking.

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Okay, did we address everything? I believe we did. Well, any it saying any group classes for tween boys weekly lectures, I think that would be a great, great idea. We've been trying to encourage him to do it, so that you know you can affect more people. And so if you have maybe if you have a group of young boys that you could gather, then we could definitely

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Consider that and even if it's just to build that you know Islamic identity or have someone you know to just to talk to sometimes it's very challenging the things that kids are going through these days. So it is very important to have kind of a big brother someone you can trust

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So tell us a little bit about your you had the weekend summer school teaching, right? What what I taught my muscle Ah, it was it was a great experience that hamdulillah I I was able to learn a lot right beam Hey, Mashallah. I would highly recommend beam you know, to anyone who's looking to put their kids in the class Mashallah, it's, it's a great opportunity for the kids, the people who teach there, they're amazing. Mashallah, so, yeah, definitely look into beam if you're in the Dallas area.

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Sorry, all of you in the UK, no other place. Alright, so what was your experience, like there to come to LA, I, really, one big thing I learned was, how to how to appeal to a large group, it was good because, you know, I first started off going off the textbook and, you know, never go off of a textbook is always came knocking over me. You know, it was they were not having it. So not having I decided, you know, I'm just gonna look over the textbook at home, and I'm just gonna see the gist of the lesson, I'm just gonna teach from the heart, right? And martial law when you teach from the heart and when you you know, talk about how things apply to them and ask them questions, really gets

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them engaged, and that really helped helped me know develop my private tutoring skills, because when you are able to appeal to a class of people aging from you know, in like five years differences, right, class of 20 different age groups, different age groups, girls and boys, all coming from different backgrounds. You know, when you have to appeal to a large group, when you go to one person to private tutoring, you know, the skills that I got from that became like a lot more enhanced, great. So I am able to, you know, it's a lot easier.

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It's a lot easier to relate now, right? Because I had to relate to a large group, it might be able to relate to one person so much easier. hamdulillah wonderful, wonderful. So we can look into doing group sizes as well like a group of sha Allah

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but I I'm more just one on one tutoring inshallah maybe in the future I'd love to look into teaching multiple kids at once. But I find especially with memorizing the court and doing one on one you know, I was thinking more like if it's let's say building Islamic identity that's all be done in a group of classes. Yeah, that kind of Islamic classes that can easily be done in a group

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All right, well, this is why you know it's been such a pleasure it's been a pleasure

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Well, we should do this more often and saw a lot Oh, I want that so sweet sister Nadia say man like grant you better can success brother kitty.

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Thank you sister.

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Kudos to your mom and dad for raising you so much ally feel very proud watching this Oh, that's very sweet Mashallah you know, we want to be able to

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inspire you and to encourage you that it is possible I know we have a lot of forces going against raising our kids in Islamic manner but you know if you do it with love you do it with humility dude with compassion rather than force and anger and frustration you're going to really be able to see great results inshallah inshallah. So check out my son's website and sign up for a free class.

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Nice having you here. Nice being here and I look forward to teaching all of your kiddos inshallah. inshallah, take care. All right, Mama, you have a good mindful heart session.

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Take care.

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Bye