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The Fiqh Of Intimacy Part 6 – Foreplay A

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Habib Bobat

Channel: Habib Bobat

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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Yes, the feeling of intimacy. And let's start off by doing a recap of the previous program. Last time we spoke about personal hygiene, and we mentioned that it is imperative that both partners are meticulous when it comes to personal hygiene. And we said that you don't want to get intimate with your partner, and then be put off because of some hygiene issues. Maybe there's a bed smell or there's a foul smell emanating from the mouth, or a smelly body, etc, etc. So we said that human beings are attracted by beauty, and naturally they are also put off by unpleasant scenes and unpleasant sites. So therefore, the prophet of Allah Salallahu alaihe. Salam has also emphasized

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that we be meticulous in this regard. That was last week's discussion. Today, we are moving on to another discussion, and that is foreplay. And this is part of our preparations. Now for plays extremely important for both partners. It's important for the husband. And it's important for the wife as well.

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Why? Because it prepares the mind and the body for relations.

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Right prepares the mind, it mentally gets you into that mode. And it also prepares you your body. That's the most important thing it prepares your body for the conjugal relations, and it leads to a pleasurable union. So foreplay is a very important ingredient when it comes to intimacy. Now, although foreplay is important for both spouses, it is more important for women. And that's because of the differences that we have within the men and within the women. Allah subhanaw taala has made us different.

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A man gets aroused much quicker as compared to a woman.

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To put it in simple terms, professionals describe it in these words, that a man is like a light bulb, switch on and above is on. But for a woman, it's different. It's not like that. She takes time. And she's like a stove you're on. And you have to wait. So there's a difference within the men and this difference within a woman. And we need to keep that in mind. It's extremely important. So a men feel that if I'm ready, she's ready. Well, that's wrong. That is wrong. And many times it's seen as being selfish. It's seen as being self centered, and you are only worried about yourself. So it comes across like that to the wife. So it's important that the husband spends time in allowing his

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partner to get herself mentally ready, and to get herself ready physically also, in terms of a body. So just keep in mind that a woman takes longer to be aroused. She needs time, and therefore the husband needs to be considered. He needs to allow his partner to warm up. He should take his time in helping her get ready. And it shouldn't be only about him. An intimate moment like that can cause friction between husband and wife and it can cause resentment between the two spouses. Resentment on the basis that the wife will say you only worried about yourself. You are gratified, you are satisfied. Your need is Fulford Yukon. What about me? So it's important that the husband does not

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overlook this. Now let's look at the Sunnah of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in this regard. And let's see what the prophet of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam has advised us led to our era Illa welcome utter hamina Sha what the misnomer attacker like a lot this will curb in for all in this hadith is telling the Sahabi that oh my companion to not begin conjugal relations

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until she has experience desire, like the desire you experience

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less you fulfill your desires before she does

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get the profit of allies guiding the Sahaba he's telling him

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don't just get into it. Allow your partner to prepay for the moment allow them to get ready. Otherwise what will happen is that you will fulfill your needs and she will be left unsatisfied. So you're the profitable lysing lead to a clearer her lead to occur in

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menasha with the Mysamma attacker, Kayla just a bit harville for all allow her to also get ready for the occasion.

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In another Hadith it is mentioned that the Prophet of Allah sallallahu Sallam advises to have a sin that do not come close to your partner except with a messenger in between. and here the messenger is referred to as foreplay. So if we look at the Sunnah of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi Salaam, we find that the Prophet of Allah Salallahu alaihe salam has encouraged the partners to keep each other's needs in mind when engaging in conjugal relations.

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Now, some people think it's against the grain of Sunnah, to engage in foreplay. They think that it's against the teachings of Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and they think that it's inappropriate. They think that it's not encouraging. So now, but I think they are mistaken, if they have to just listen to the above words of Rasulullah, sallAllahu, Alayhi, salaam and other Hadith, most definitely that person, he or she will change his mind and his outlook towards this matter. As we find that it is a clear cut son of Rasulullah sallallahu. They sent him to engage in foreplay. In fact, the mom No, you're absolutely right. That foreplay and passionate kissing before relation is

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an emphatic Sunnah. And it is this like to do otherwise. So keep in mind that foreplay is important, and it's even even more important for the wife. We live it here today. And in the coming program. We will discuss some of the areas of foreplay, and some of the common questions that people always ask that we'll address in the coming program.