Channel: Fatima Barkatulla
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Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam and are sorely left your sisters are Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.
And welcome to another lesson
of the 17 major sins and how to avoid them based on cable cut by air by mom and never we, today we're going to do
we're going to talk about a major sin that
people find hard to talk about this one, you know, like I even had some discussion discussions with Chu.
And when I wanted to prepare for this class, and
even they said that it's almost become like,
a topic that she will shy away from as well, especially in western countries. So Charla, we're not going to shy away from it. Because when it comes to matters of the deen, you know, we don't have a right to, to censor the deen. Right. If you think about I remember one time I was giving a talk to sisters about the hijab. And there were some women in the audience who, who did not wear hijab. He did not observe hijab, right in any way. And obviously, there were some tough things that I was saying, you know, from their perspective, I thought they might get offended, you know, because I was talking about the obligation, etc. And I remember afterwards, one of my dear sisters, sister, Rama
Abdul Latif, don't know if you know her. She's a wonderful sister here in
London, who is $1 bottle M. And really like, I think she's a counselor as well, she's really a wise sister, she took me aside afterwards. And she said, you know, Fatima, when you're, when you're giving a talk, and you're, you're telling people about a command of Allah, then never apologize. You know, she said, never apologize. And the reason why she said is because I remember when I was giving the talk, said, Look, I don't want to offend anyone. You know, I was like, being like, a bit apologetic, I guess. She felt and so she said, Don't Don't be embarrassed, and don't ever apologize, because you're telling them what their Creator asked of them.
You're giving them a gift at the end of the day, right? So
with that spirit in shall,
we shall proceed. So one of the major sins, major sin number 47 is no shows or marotti. Allah zoji her wife's disobedience towards her pet her husband, or wife's disobedience towards the husband.
Now, you know, sometimes you can ask yourself, like,
in our culture, it's not normal to say obedience, right? Like people don't, apparently, even the Christian Church has removed, you know, when when they have a marriage, marriage vows.
They used to be to,
to, to having to hold to something and to obey, right?
Right. So one of the vowels that the wife would give, when she was getting married, you know, that the altar, she would say
that she agrees to obey her husband.
And I think it was Prince William, and sorry, I don't know why I keep referring to the royal family. It's very British of me to do that. But yeah,
it's just I just happen to know, Royal Family trivia.
But also because if you think about it, the elite family in any society, they set the tone for the rest of the society, right? So I remember when Prince William was getting married, they removed the words to obey, from the vows that
his wife, Kate Middleton was going to say, in the church. So you can see that's what's happening in our society. Now that even saying that you are willing to obey your husband has become like, a weird thing, right?
why should it be like, when we say obedience to parents, people don't flinch. Right? Like one of the major sins is disobedience to parents.
Right? Well, treating them not treating them well. But it's also disobedience to parents. That's a major sin. And that's a major sin even when you're an adult. Right? It's
Even a major scene, if you're an adult, if your parents ask you to do something, and it's not her arm, and you're able to do it, then generally speaking, you're supposed to do it
in everything, okay? in every area, but
generally we understand obedience to parents.
When it comes to the husband, people have a problem with it. But they only have a problem with it because they don't understand the balance that Islam seeks to create in society, with the hierarchy within the family. Okay.
And they don't understand the immense responsibility that Islam places upon the shoulders of men on the shoulders of husbands.
Right, wherever a person seems to have a certain privilege, you will see that they also have a higher degree of responsibility, and if
that's the case for the husband as well. Whereas in wider society, husband and wife are being seen as partners now. Okay.
both equally are supposed to be responsible for financial provision.
You know, splitting the bill and all that, right.
At the end of the day,
it's unrealistic because there's no equality at all. How is it equality if husband and wife are both responsible for financial provision, and yet the wife bears the majority of the burden of childbirth, pregnancy, childbirth, and child rearing.
And has to bear the responsibility for financial provision. Like how is that equal?
That there's, it's the idea that that's equal is a fallacy. It's a fallacy. So we need to not buy into this narrative. A lot kind of Allah tells us in the Quran, original ko Muna Allah Nisa BMF football Allahu Allahu Allah about will be mad. I'm football I mean, I'm wearing him.
For smiley face smiley had to Barney dad one half ivatan little baby, B Mahaffey, the law. Men are in charge of women, men are the protectors and maintainers of women, sometimes people translated as they are a warm
over the women, because men have been provisioned by Allah over women, the my father Allahu Allah, whom Allah about, because of what the quality is, Allah has given one over the other.
What the mountain football mean, I'm worthy him, and because they are tasked with supporting them financially.
And then Allah says, so the righteous women, the pious women are devoutly obedient.
And they God in their husbands absence, what Allah would have them God.
And of course, this ayah means that men, Allah has made men in charge of women in the family, the husband is the CEO.
Right? husband is the director, if you like, could say the husband is the director and the wife is the CEO. Actually, that's one way of looking at it, right?
the person who the buck stops with is the husband, he makes the final decisions. That's not to say that a husband should never consult his wife.
Of course, a husband should consult his wife, any wise husband would do that anyway, right? Unless he wants, you know, constant,
constant headache. Right? You would always consult his wife anyway, but he doesn't have to. And at the end of the day, he's the I mean, he is the person in charge. And
when you're when you are me, if you might consult with people, you might do shorter, but you make the final decisions. Right? So the husband is the head of the house.
And that's because Allah has given men certain characteristics, just as he's given women certain characteristics, and so men are suited to that role. Allah created men to be suited to that role. And it keeps the balance in the family
and also because Allah has given them the
responsibility for providing for the family.
So there's a huge responsibility and burden on them.
And therefore, because Allah has given them so much responsibility and a higher degree of responsibility,
Allah has also placed,
given them certain rights, and asked us ask the wives to be obedient to their husbands. And God in their husband's absence, what Allah would have them God, yeah, and he, when the husband is away, you, as a wife are protecting and taking care of his well, his children, and of course yourself in terms of the way you dress, who you allow into your home.
And you just conducting affairs the way your husband would want them to be conducted, right, so you respect your husband's wishes, even when he's not there, even when he's not there.
So look, let's talk about some of the husband's responsibilities. Because the reason why we have to mention this is because I think a lot of the time, we've forgotten this. And that's why sisters find it hard to accept that there's such thing as obedience, you know,
when you see all of the responsibility of the husband, you realize, okay, this is fair, of course, Allah Subhanallah is just
some of the husband's responsibilities are to provide the manner to his wife. Okay, the dour, which is something that when you're getting married, you, you can ask for a certain amount as a gift, okay?
And he must give that, okay.
You know, if he agrees, and he's made the marriage contract with you, whatever has been put into that contract, he should be, should be on it, to provide food, shelter, clothing, for his wife's needs, according to what is the norm, right, according to what is the norm, or what he is able to provide? So according to what is the norm could be like, somebody of your
what's normal for somebody of your background to be provided with, right? So like, Okay, if you're from a background where it was normal for you to have servants, okay, as an example, maybe you're like, you know, upper class family, and you had servants or your life, and that's
what you expect. And that's what your husband has the ability to provide, then
the norm for you is to have servants in your house, right.
But if it's not that, for example, then it's not.
So whatever a woman of your background, or a woman from your, of your social status, whatever the norm is, that's what is expected for the husband to provide.
And to provide for all the needs of the children, of course, his children, not to break the terms of your marriage contract, whether it's implicit terms, or implicit terms, meaning things that are only part of the marriage contract by default, for example, like we said, the provision and then also
to be able to have sexual intercourse, right.
So those are the implicit terms. And also the right to have children, for example, you know,
like if a wife wants to have children or husband shouldn't be
stopping them from having children,
or any extra terms that were agreed when contracting the marriage. So maybe when you were putting together the marriage contract, there was some kind of stipulations that were put in there, for example, that the husband would stay in a particular country,
that you would stay in a particular country together, etc, you know, any kinds of stipulations that were agreed in the marriage contract, they should be honored.
And to treat co wives equally in terms of division of time and finances. Right? Unless a co wife agrees that she doesn't want as much time. Fine, right. But in terms of the moon,
each wife should be given an equal division of time and equality when it comes to gifts and anything kind of financial, right. And also to teach his family the obligatory aspects of the deen
or provide the means to do so.
So one of the Rights of the Child, for example, is that they, the father teaches them for him, right? So whatever provision they can be for that is the Father,
Son of sometimes the wife's responsibilities
are obedience, if the husband asks his wife to do something,
something that is not disobedience to Allah, then the wife should do her best to fulfill that request.
Also to make herself available to him,
do not allow anyone to enter his house. He doesn't want. So she should only leave the house with His permission. And sometimes people misunderstand that. And they think, does that mean like, every time I'm going out, I have to like, explicitly ask my husband, know, if there's, if there's a general agreement between you that you know, you go out for your needs, so that's fine. But for example, you're having an argument, and you want to walk out,
right? having an argument, you feel like storming out of the house,
you can't just do that, if he says,
Do not, do not leave the house, you can't leave the house, that's
basically a sin. Right.
Um, and to serve Him as is considered the norm. So
as in, you know, just general cooking and those types of things.
If it's the norm in your society, for you to cook and, or to do whatever household things, then it becomes part of your responsibilities as well, right?
some points to remember. So this major sin is no shows which is, which can be translated as rebellion, or refusing to acknowledge the authority of the husband. Okay.
the husband is ultimately the head of the family.
And that needs to be understood. And unfortunately, I think it seems that some people from the younger generation don't have not been taught that because maybe because scholars are afraid to sort of say it in explicit terms.
It's politically incorrect or whatever. Right? It seems like a lot of the younger generation that missed the memo, you know, they did, they did, they never really heard that. And so now, when they get married, they have unrealistic expectations of marriage.
And we ended up with weak men.
Right? We need men. And we ended up with women who, who don't get it, don't understand that actually, that hierarchy, if you want to call it that, within the family, is there for the benefit of the family is there for the benefit of each person involved.
If the wife is unhappy with the requests or demands of her husband, then of course, she can negotiate with him right in a decent way.
And if a situation arises, where they just can't resolve it between themselves, of course, she tried to resolve things between ourselves, right? As a husband and wife, you don't need to take every problem outside the family. And in fact, sometimes that's very detrimental, especially for little arguments and things like that, of course, you should try to sort them out between yourselves. But if you can't, then Islam encap encourages us to seek mediation. And mediation is where
you either both go to a person of knowledge, right? or it doesn't have to even be a personal knowledge. It can be somebody from either side, right? So
who is considered
an elder or some kind of a well wisher a wise person right? From her side or from and from his side.
That can be a way of mediating between them.
Or arbitration. Arbitration is more formal in the sense that
the woman brings somebody from her side who it doesn't have to be their father doesn't have to be someone like that. It can be a chef that she trusts or a family member who she feels or reference
sent her well, and cares about her, etc. And then the the, the the husband bring somebody who he feels that way about as well.
And they agree that once they have sat down and explained the issues, whatever those two people decide,
becomes binding on the two.
Do you see whatever they decide becomes binding on the two.
So that's what arbitration is. And then to escalate that even further, like if arbitration doesn't work, then the escalation is basically
you know, in front of our guardi or a chef, right? The Sharia council or whatever, right? But obviously, we want it not to get to that stage, we hope that things can be resolved either between the couple, or
through mediation or arbitration. Right.
I just thought I'd explain the kind of framework, you know,
that Islam gives to a couple in terms of solving disputes.
Now, abhorred IRA are the Alon who reported the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, if a woman prays her five prayers, fasts her month of Ramadan, guards her chastity and obeys her husband, she will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes.
I just reflect on that for a moment. If a woman prays have five, prayer five prayers on time,
fast the month of Ramadan.
God your chastity, meaning don't have any illegal sexual relations
and obeys her husband. She will enter Paradise from any gate she wishes. And this this habit has been classed as a Hey,
if you think about that, that's a gift. You know, that's a gift to women. It's a gift to women.
Put it up on your fridge, you know, as a list as a checklist. Am I keeping up with these things?
I'm not the only one who also said the Messenger of Allah sallallahu Sallam said, If a man calls his wife to his bed,
obviously it means for sexual intercourse or some kind of sexual
you know, relations, and she refuses, does not come.
And he spends the night angry with her.
The angels will curse her until the morning.
So panela. So you see this hadith immediately makes that a major sin. Right?
Because if the angels curse somebody, then that is a major sin. Right?
And it shows you the immense kind of
importance of realizing that as a wife, you
you're actually helping your husband to stay chaste, just as he is supposed to be helping you to stay chaste. Right? Why do we get married, one of the reasons is to
be able to have a loving marriage, a loving union, but also a sexual union, right? In a Hello way, in a way that is pleasing to God, pleasing to Allah, and to be able to have children. But we can't diminish the fact that an important part of it is to be able to have sexual relations and to express ourselves sexually, right?
So here, this had these really spells out for us that as a wife, if your husband is calling you, even if you're busy doing something, okay.
You should respond.
And this is why there's a hadith about, you know, not fasting, voluntary fasts when your husband is present without asking his permission, because when you're in a state of fasting, obviously, you can't have sexual relations. And that kind of puts a barrier between you and your husband. But you can obviously you have to do that in Ramadan. Okay, that's a must. But outside of Ramadan, when it's say
non obligatory, fast, then you should ask your husband or generally get his hand
Mission, you know,
so that if he does want to have relations, he can do that.
And it's not prevented through you fasting.
And remember that's both ways like even both ways in the sense even though the there's no Hadith that explicitly says that there is a greater degree of responsibility
mentioned in this Hadith, generally speaking, you know, the prophets are seldom told men off who would fast all the time and stay up all night praying and neglected their wives. He criticized men who did that, right?
points to remember that it's both the husband and wife's moral duty to fulfill each other's sexual desires. Right? It's not just the wife's duty, it's the husband's duty as well. Right to the best of their ability. This doesn't mean, okay, that the husband can force his wife. Unfortunately, I have heard dad sometimes talk about this concept of
terrible to talk about it. But this idea of marital rape, right, which is an unfortunate term really, you know, it's a very Western term. I wouldn't personally use that term, but meaning
a wife being forced,
coerced to have sexual intercourse by a husband. And sometimes I talk about it in a very ambiguous way. I think it's very clear that the Sharia there's no evidence in the Sharia that a husband has been allowed to force his wife, force his wife to have sexual intercourse. against her will, however, listen carefully. This is it's a it's a nuanced point that I'm making, right? However, it is the wife's moral duty.
To not refuse.
Can you see the subtle distinction in that?
That Islam does not
permit a husband to force his wife. However, because a marriage, the marriage contract itself is a type of consent. Okay? It's like a general consent, isn't it between you both that you can enjoy each other's company and intimacy? Right? That's the whole point of a marriage contract one of the main points, right? So because of that, it is the wife's moral duty to not refuse her husband, just as it's the husband's moral duty, okay? If his wife has sexual needs, that he meets those sexual needs to the best of his ability, and he doesn't neglect her, right?
Um, but, okay, if she reviews, if she refuses to have intercourse, or to respond to his advances
with a valid reason, then
there's no sin upon, right? If she's in pain, for example, or she's ill, or she's got some other reason, okay. Only a,
quite a brutish mountain, right would force a woman who
is ill, for example, or, or try to even, you know, coerce a woman who's ill to, to have relations with him, right?
So if she does have a valid reason, and she can say no, right? But the The point is that it shouldn't be like an arbitrary thing, you know? And so morally, she would be sinful, if without a valid reason. She refuses. Okay, so I want you to bear those two things in mind that yes, it's morally a sin. She's sinful with a lie, Annie, for refusing to have or refusing to have sexual relations with her husband. without a valid excuse.
Okay, she's morally sinful.
But there's nothing in the deen that says that a man is allowed to force his wife to have sexual relations. If she has a valid reason she can refuse and vice versa, right.
It could be the other way around as well.
You know, some of the all of my talk actually about how you know, even the husband
He shouldn't neglect his wife, and there should be a minimum sort of sexual intimacy between them. Right? He should try to maintain that, because the wife also has sexual needs.
Now, although I'm mentioning that I don't want to diminish this major sin, because this major sin is about the wife, right? It's major sin is specific to the wife. And there are other major sins that you will have noticed in katolik, about her that are, you could say, are specific to men, right?
Because men hold those roles, for example, the judge, right, the unjust judge, etc, that's going to be a man.
So, you know, these are just basically the major sins are mentioned, sins that are mentioned with some punishment or some promise of curse or something like that attached to them right?
I will have a man who narrated that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, it's not permissible for a woman to fast when her husband is present, except with His permission. So this is the SU Parag, retrieved fast enough feel fast, not an obligatory fast,
or to allow anyone to enter his house without his permission.
So if your husband explicitly says to you, I don't want
such and such to, to be inside my house, okay. I don't want you to be alone with a man for example, that shouldn't be happening anyway. But for example, right?
You should, you've got to listen to that.
Even hedger, explain this. And he said, this hadith shows that the husbands right over the wife are more important than doing voluntary good deeds, because fulfilling his right is obligatory, and that which is obligatory takes precedence over voluntary act. So look, as Muslim women, we should view this as obedience to Allah. Right? If you're, if you're obeying a lot, it means you're getting rewarded anyway, you're getting rewarded for being your husband.
that is in and of itself a good deed.
So in sha Allah,
you're not losing out, in other words, right? By listening to your husband, or being Yasmine.
Before we move on, I like to see if anyone has any
questions or comments about that. So we might be able to fit in another two, actually, because I don't think we need to go into a lot of detail with these ones, but
making images, making images on clothes, walls, things that are in the house, right.
Another translation actually says making images on clothes, walls, stones,
coins, and all things, whether it be in the wax, paste, iron, copper wool, or anything else, I don't know where they got that detailed translation, because the actual book doesn't say those details.
But maybe it's part of the explanation.
Anyway, the point is having statues, a person making statues, making sculptures that are of living things,
that is a major sin, right? I'm making images of things that are living also is a major sin, having images of living things on your walls, right, you should avoid that. Because the angels don't enter a house that has that.
Even Abbas reported the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said every, every maker of graven images will be in the hellfire. Every image he made will be given a soul to punish him in hell.
Even a bus said if you must do so, make images of trees, whatever does not have a soul within it. And like we could we could link this sin to the fact that
it was because human beings started making images of
living things, right? And then sculptures of living things that they then went down path of idolatry, right. You must know the story of how
the first shark started to happen, right? Because if you think about it, ultimately Sam he must have been sorry, not he must have been he was you
He was a Muslim, right. He was a Wahid, he believed in Allah alone, and his children as well, and his children's children. But at some point down the line, something changed, right. And so the story goes that
I believe it was, in one of the generations after other money center, many generations after the money center.
When the pious people passed away, right, the elders, they passed away. The people, that generation that was left behind was very distraught, very distraught, and they thought, you know, we need to remember our elders in some way, they were so pious.
And of course, chevonne came to them. And he encouraged them with that. And he said, Why don't you?
Why don't you create some likeness to them, right.
And so they, they did that they did that, they created something that would remind them of
that dead person who had passed that person who had passed away who was pious, and, you know, led them to making statues.
And then, eventually bringing those statues into their place of worship, right, where they used to worship, Allah alone, said, let's just bring those statues into our place of worship, we'll keep them at the back. But when we see them, they'll remind us of our pious forefathers, our forebears, and it will make us better worshipers of Allah. And so they did that. You see how shaytaan works by stealth, he never gets you to do a sin.
Just like that, you know, if you're a pious person, he doesn't just get you to do a sin like that he will, he'll just make certain things your way you away slowly. And then they would bring
the images closer and closer to the front, right? With each generation, people forgot the purpose of those images of those statues, and then eventually,
those statues would end up at the front of the masjid or the place of worship.
they began to worship those idols, instead of calling Allah started calling on those idols. Right? This is exactly how shirke came about. So we believe as Muslims that
it wasn't that human beings were
polytheists. And then they became monotheists. As you know, some, I don't know, anthropologists seem to think it's actually the opposite, that human beings were first monotheists and then they became polytheists.
Over time, and
you know, anthropologists might say, well, there's no evidence for that, like, we have images and we have idols.
And then eventually,
we have evidence that people became monotheistic. But the point is that you can't have evidence of monotheism, right? By definition, because monotheism means that you don't have statues, right? So that period of monotheism was there before. It was there before the polytheism. And the reason why you don't have so called evidence of it, or it seems that there is a is because there is no evidence for people worshiping one God, right? Because they don't have images. That's the whole point. Right? So
this is how she came about. And it could be that this is the reason why, you know, Islam is so strong against
And you can see, you know, people do worship statues, people even, they idolize people, right, to an extreme. And even some people when they put images of the chef in the house, you know, I've seen people put an image of their chef in the house. And you think,
like, why are you doing that? It's got that same connotation, hasn't it? The pious person? I must have an image of the pious person in front of me to be able to, I don't know, somehow feel pious or become pirates. No, it? Yeah, it's actually diverting your attention away from Allah towards somebody else.
Don't do that. You don't need that. It's better to have an idea of Quran will have, you know,
things that will remind you, of Allah Subhana Allah that I'm not other human beings.
It's better to have that.
Now photographs are not the same. Okay? I don't believe photographs are the same as,
as images that are made by hand, or drawn by hand, or shaped by hand, right? They're not the same, because a photograph is like a mirror image of real life. And nobody is actually
shaping that and making that right. So photographs don't come under that same category. But of course, it's difference of opinion regarding whether you can actually display photographs or not.
I would have would just avoid it. There's no need to display photographs. You know, keep them in a in an album or something like that.
Okay, let me see if there's any questions.
Okay, yeah. So what about when children are told to draw images for schoolwork?
So my, our policy in our family was that
just as the Prophet sallallahu, alayhi wasallam allowed children to have dolls, right? We know that children had dolls and in his time, but they would have been quite crude, probably right?
Not like, very perfectly formed. Okay?
Just as the Prophet sallallahu Sallam allowed children to have toys,
while a child is young,
from my research, and the opinion that I follow is that it's okay for them to do drawings, right. And it's okay for them to just allow them to explore and be free to a certain extent, right. But as they start getting older, you want to make it clear to them that what the rules are, and for them to stop, you know,
again, books, for me that would be similar to similar to toys. You know, a children's book is basically like a toy, if you think about it, they treat it like a toy, you know, something for their entertainment for their i think it's it's fine, you know, while their children up to what age?
I mean, look,
definitely, by the time they're adults, you want you want them to stop. But even if there's an image in a book, okay, it doesn't mean you can't have the book, just cover the image, right? I mean, like, you know, as they get older, when they have teen books, the front cover might have
some painting on it or some picture, you could just cover it, right? That's something it doesn't mean, we're not going to have that book in the house. It just means cover it in some way. Right? Change it or cover it.
Like I said, generally speaking, when it comes to kids, the rules are a bit relaxed. Okay, so
let the rules be relaxed. But if it's not necessary, well, I mean, there's no point. putting things on walls, really. I mean, it's okay, especially if you can encourage them to draw scenery, trees and those types of things to put on walls, flowers, objects, and fine if it's people just avoid it, you know, but if they really want to, I wouldn't really make a big fuss out of it. Because again, it's like having toys right in the room. It's like that.
So I hope that's
helpful. I should have reported that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam entered the house while there was a curtain with pictures on it. The color of his face changed. Then he grabbed the curtain and had it torn into pieces.
The profits on our salon said, verily, among the most severely punished on the Day of Resurrection are those who make such graven images. And you can see what happened to the Christians. Right? What happened to the Christians?
Probably because of their legacy from the Romans, right?
And you know, the Romans, they were just obsessed with imagery, right?
paintings, imagery, all of that. Just look at the Sistine Chapel, right? Michelangelo's Sistine Chapel and you see, there's literally a painting of God, an Adam and
Satan, and you know what I mean? It's like,
what's going on? You know, like, there's an old man with a long beard. And that's Scott.
And you can see what happened to the Christians. Right? They and again, even amongst the Christians they had was because some Christians didn't agree with that, you know, they removed that they, they were iconoclastic and they, they wanted to remove all of the imagery, because they saw it as a bid our sir as a bidder in their in their theology. But then others were. No they wanted the imagery. You can see what's happened saints, images of Mary Jesus, Jesus is a white man with blue eyes apparently. Right?
So basically they just created God and Jesus and all of the people who they worship well they revere in their own image. White people hate Subhan Allah and you must know that
the famous story of Malcolm X when you know when he confronted a Christian pastor
and said, You know why, why is Jesus? Why is he white? You know, you're getting us to worship a white man you're basically getting us to worship a white man because you believe God is white.
And you know, he made a point that that was used as a way to get basically Africans right? Or African people have Black Heritage to worship a white man right? And then what happens is is seared into your mind that this is the ideal right? If you're literally worshipping a white man, who you think is God will God son What does that do to your psychology? You know,
anyway, inshallah I'm going to end with that one.
So next time
we'll carry on and then we'll also go on to this which is um, when somebody dies wailing you know, wailing and what are the limits to that crying and wailing what is the port what is the difference? We'll go into that because wailing and saying certain types of statements when somebody passes away out of lamentation is a major sin
Yeah, okay, so this is the said this is asking about look, we've kids pillows in different do they cases okay? Just avoid it
you know, I didn't I didn't used to like my children to have animals on their clothes. personally.
I just felt uncomfortable with that. Just avoid it. Why Why do you need to do that there's so many clothes nowadays. All different types
all different types of themes. You know, if the entire football team you could do that you could have that or you could have anything, you know, any other interests. So I think our role as parents, isn't it, that we were always trying to steer them towards something positive, right? If they're steered towards something negative or something that could end up being negative, you're just trying to gently show them not shut them down, but to say, hey, look, look at this option is better.
And I'm just gonna end with one last funny story, which is when my kids were younger, so my husband supports Liverpool right? football team.
And so so did I as a young person, I already cared that much to be honest.
And when my sons were younger, because I wanted to avoid them wearing a T shirt that said colesberg on it right? Or that said standard charter which is like a I think it's an investment bank or some kind of banking thing right?
When my son got into football, I bought him an arsenal t shirt. Okay, because the arsenal I think it said it dad, right? I forgotten what it said. But see that that's how connected I am to football. But whatever it said it was something decent, right? And so I felt good that Okay, my son is wearing a football kit that has something decent return on it.
But unfortunately, the legacy of that has been
in my family.
There are like four different Deaf football teams being supported. And my husband blames me until today for his son's not supporting Liverpool. So anyway, I just thought I'd share that funny story with you. Though I had a good intention. I wanted to avoid my I didn't like to see my flesh and blood. You know, my pure children. wearing something that has that is a logo over
Have you know like a
beer company or a bank or something right? And of course my husband agrees with that. But I think he wishes that
I hadn't put my kids in in another team's shirt.
does not come out here and says sisters with that I will leave you. So panic Allah home ob handig eyeshadow Illa Illa Atlanta stuff we will go to blue lake. See you next time.