Friday Night Etiquettes Class – December 18, 2020

Daood Butt


Channel: Daood Butt

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AI: Summary © The speakers discuss the importance of privacy and safety for those who are not members of the Muslim community. They stress the need for acceptance of Islam among minority groups and setting up parents properly. The speakers also discuss the use of language in interactions and the importance of responding to social media messages. They stress the need for understanding and setting up habit with oneself.
AI: Transcript ©
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Rely on Delilah mean or Sawa to LA he was set up while and to be here to carry him. I didn't get a lot of solder to attempt esteem. From the shock nice Audrey were Sidley Emily Ragnarok. That Emily Cerny of Gabor Kohli, my brothers and my sisters sent him already come to LA, he will work out.

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I hope everyone is doing well in sha Allah, Allah.

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Today is the 18th of December Friday

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in the year 2020, and one of the brothers was joking around with me on the way out after sada he was saying, you know, martial law is one of the one of the other brothers is talking about age. And then the other brother, he goes, humbler, you know, you're still young until you start seeing the white hairs come out. And I said, Well, you don't realize it. But you know, underneath my mask, everyone's wearing a mask, you can't really tell but somehow I already have some white hairs in my beard. And so I was like, how about I'm already there now, like, there's, there's no going back. And so we have the law, it is what it is, and this year, and I was telling him, you know what, when this year

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finally passes and shot, a lot of data and the pandemic goes away, and things slowly start to resume as they were, and hopefully our even gets stronger, we come closer to a law.

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You know, when we all have to remove our masks, I think we're probably going to feel a sense of satisfaction keeping that mask on. Right, it's it's been hiding a lot of us and who we are. And, you know, it's been, it's been a huge part of our lives for the last year, which is a drastic change. But I know for some people in whatever part of the world they live in, you know, they wear masks all the time. And so what seems abnormal to us is something completely normal to others. Alright, so we're gonna continue our class, it is eight o'clock, I usually like to stall a little bit as we start up, because, you know, when as soon as we go live, people get a notification and then they

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stop doing what they're doing and come on. So Hello, we're live, we're going to continue in sha Allah And remember, we were learning about etiquettes, morals, values and etiquettes and we do continue that today in sha Allah as well.

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So, today's topic is giving set m So, we were in the chapter of senem salutations Greetings, you know, giving set m to one another. And so, today's topic is starting with the set em towards someone who is not Muharram for us. So, for example, if we think of it in the context of a man or a brother, you know, giving them to someone who he is not Muharram for someone who is if we could use the term foreign to that person, and what we mean by foreign for those who may not know is that nicly you know, a man and a woman are not permitted to be together alone, you know, in seclusion or dating or anything of that sort except that they are held for one another that they are permitted to be in

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that you know, situation together. And this can mean you know, a person with his you know, this use the use the men as the example. So, the men with his wife, the men and his sister and his mother and so on basically all the people that we covered in the past in our fifth class as being held on for a person

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so now we look at giving sentencing a set Mr. equal to a Muslim sister who is not my home for us, or for a Muslim sister to give send them to a men who is not to my home for her.

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And so we see that the scholars actually differ on this. And it's because they are citing with caution, right, they are basically being cautious. They're trying to be careful. They're trying to encourage people not to you know, open the door of shape on or not to give shape on the opportunity to even knock at that door. And what we mean here is that first off it is this dynamically permissible for you know, us to give sell them to others in general right to other believers, right. So when he gives them you get sent up, said Mr. eleiko, Santa Monica, Santa Monica, Santa Monica, right, or SMRT come up with law or as we learned a set Mr. La come to LA he will but I kept. Now

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that's fine and dandy, but when we when we look at giving them to someone who we are not Muharram for, or,

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you know, someone getting sent them to someone who they're not Helen, to be around in with the question there is, well, is there a harm that could come from it? And this is where some of the scholars say no, it is not permissible. And then some scholars say it is permissible. The ones who say that it is not permissible. They're saying that because they want to avoid a fitna. They want to avoid something that could possibly arise from two people beginning a conversation with each other. But now we need to ask ourselves this question.

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If we

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I live in a country or in an area where Muslims are a minority there, right? There's not many Muslims around. And this was something that I found we dealt with a lot as a Muslim community in the last year two or three from now, right, is that we are sometimes being targeted, right? Muslims are being targeted, you know, whether it's in the media or by people on the street, strangers that are passing by, and it gives a sense of security, a sense of, you know, safety to anyone, whether men or woman who's walking by and feels that someone else is a believer, and would be there to look after that person in the case that something may go wrong or happen. And so when you're walking by your

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Muslim brother or your Muslim sister, generally from an Islamic perspective, it's permissible to say, a set mRNA and I would say that in the current context for us here in Canada, it is encouraged even more for us to give setup and to say senem allowed for a number of reasons. First of all, you want that sense of security and safety and, you know, comfort knowing that there's other Muslims there are other Muslims around you, that should there should there be something that goes wrong, or that happens, you know, insha Allah, the Muslim will be the person that will stand up to help you and assist you.

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Also, I feel that we should be giving to them out loud and to each other, even more so than in other places on earth, mainly because we are small in number, and we're small number, but

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the more we resist giving sem to each other, the more we feel isolated, and the smaller we feel in terms of numbers as well. And so when we give them to one another, you meet another Muslim you say a Cem or they come you're not doing anything more and you should not do anything more should not walk by and say said Mr. alikhan. How are you sister? How's everything today? Mashallah, you know, you're looking really good hamdulillah your hijab is matching your you know, it's matching your your clothing, and that's matching your shoes, and that's matching the sky, the sky is beautiful today, look at the sunset, you know, the sisters like, you know, you're going at it right? Oh, it's not

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supposed to be that way. You're walking by someone and you say said Mr. Nikam, you have to remember that in your mind, in your heart. And on your tongue, what you're doing is you're seeing a door out for that person. You're saying a stellar medical May the peace and blessings and safety and security from a loved one who owns peace, right? The one who owns that safety mean, may he shower his peace and safety and blessings down upon you. And so you're making $1 out for this person to be safe and to be protected under the one who owns that protection as well, not us. We don't own that protection. We are not in charge, you know, we may try to do something, you try to move your hand

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and all of a sudden it doesn't move anymore because we're not in control. Right, the loss of Henry Tana ultimately is in control. And so when we think of Allah azza wa jal, I said, I'm

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the one who provides this, you know, goodness and greatness and all that's good out there and must handle water and, you know, is who we should be thinking about when we give them to someone else, and not be thinking about what that person is doing, or what that person is wearing, or where that person is going? Or what you know, the makeup and the matching and the essence of the perfume the brother is wearing. And you know, the beard has done up nicely and so on and so forth. No, none of that should matter. In fact, we should be thinking of a loss of Hannah Horta no taala when we're giving set out to someone else that Allah has blessed me with the ability to give set them to

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another person and that person is a blessing from Allah subhanaw taala to receive my setup and remember the rights of the Muslim upon another is that you respond to the Senate as well and so when someone says said Mr. La come to you as we learned in the prep in the past weeks right is that they will respond to your spam also

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so from that angle when we look at it as us Muslims here in in Canada for example or in any other country out there

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where Muslims are minority

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why feel shy? No that's that's another point that I want to touch upon why feel shy?

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You know, why? Why are we shy? To say the name of Allah subhana wa Tada. so others can hear the name of the last panel which had you know, instead of Muslims walking to Muslims, one by one, so, and the other ones like they say, so now I don't know. I don't know. This is talking to friends with that person just say sometimes or what do they say? Oh, maybe they're not Muslim. They didn't they didn't say it right. Yeah, they're not a Muslim. Just just respond like anonymous, right? Why they come? Right. No, you know, you, you're greeted with set em or

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you see another Muslim. Greet them with

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sent out and we'll talk about greeting the non Muslims shortly right after this and Shabaab attack. Okay. So we're talking about the Muslim meeting the Muslim and getting set up.

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In addition to that, my brothers and sisters,

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we should have good thoughts of each other. Like there's one thing for you to be the one who's getting sent out to someone else. But if you're walking by someone, or that someone is walking by you, I should say, and they give you send them have good thoughts of that person. Don't think like stuff that allow you know, we're at university and, you know, a sister walks by a bunch of brothers and she says, I said, Mr. Eddie, come to the brothers and the brothers alike stuff at all. Look at his sister, you know, she has no higher

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she has she she gave Muslim Selim and the Muslims are saying she has no higher she has no modesty.

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we as believers in Allah subhanho wa Taala should feel honored that we have that opportunity to give Selim to one another. Right? That we are greeting each other with the greetings of the believers that came from the time of Adam Allah has set up

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a greeting that will be given to us upon entry into paradise.

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All right, sat down.

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And then the Baraka of Allah subhana wa tada and the Rama of Allah subhana wa Tada. Yet Muslims turn around and be like stuff but a lot of this sister She has no hair she's not modest. Right? Just to watch show off just to try and look good just to try and you know, be someone who, you know is eloquent in your speech? No, we shouldn't judge the other person. And the same thing my sisters when a Muslim brother walks by you know one understand that this brother who's saying send them to you, first of all, we have to have a personal one, right person oven Why? Because when we have su oven, which is negative assumptions of others, okay, when we assume something of someone else that is

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negative, we have to understand the prophet SAW longer it he was selling Thomas as well as Allah Subhana Allah, that the majority of what we assume are nothing but false tails are nothing but lies right.

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And so, the majority of what we assume is nothing but lies. Therefore, what this means is that we should not be assuming things of others and when we do, we are probably wrong. And when we do assume something of someone, we are probably wrong. Why? Because Allah subhanaw taala the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, we learned this in our Deen, right? So

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don't assume that someone is up to no good when they give you sat down. Assume that this person is giving you sent them because they feel content and also we want to let you know I'm a believer, and I'm greeting you with the greetings of this door that I'm showering upon you as in a blessing you with in fact you're asking a lot to bless that person with you're not blessing them with you're asking a lot to bless that person with that right with the blessings of alarm that peace and safety and so on. And Baraka, Allah subhana wa Tada. All right, so that's regards to getting sent out to someone who is not my home for us, right? Someone who is not technically family.

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Now we look at what is the permissibility of giving senem to someone who is young like a child. So an adult giving senem to a child. And I said no Malik are the longer and he narrates that the prophet SAW longer and he was solemn said, Sorry, you married saying and who can AMC marital Sula, he's on a longer and he was sending nsmb Malik or the lover and he was walking with the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. Okay. And as he's walking with the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, they passed by a Serbian a child, right? a child who's young for similarily him.

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So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he passed by these children and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam greeted them with Salah.

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Now, I know some of you are thinking, Wait a second, we just learned last week or the week before that the youngsters should give senem to the elders. Right. But that is who should start, like out of the morals and etiquettes that we learn in our Deen, who should start the setup. Who should say a set Mr. Eddie come first. Right instead of what a call center who starts with a set Mr. Annika? But here we see the prophet SAW a lot more. I think he was sending them beginning and saying a set em or I may come to these children. Is that wrong? No. It's part of Tobia. It's part of Tobia and it's also part of softening the hearts. Right. And so you'll notice when you see a child and you see them

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like oh, Santa Monica, how are you? And sometimes you'll see adults where they just like okay adults mixed with adults and teens.

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There's a mix of teenagers. I'm glad I just saw a bunch of teenagers ganging up on an uncle, a brother who's about my age, probably younger than me, you know, but I call him an uncle just for the sake of it.

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Because he's teenagers were like, you know, all standing around him and the probably like friends of this brothers son. Right? And so you know, the standing around and I'm like, Guys, guys, come on, man. If you're gonna gang up on an uncle, at least you got to be like six feet away each, right? So you got to have your distance away from this uncle. So you can't really beat up this uncle. And we're talking about it lightheartedly. Like their friends, they know each other right? So they're talking come to LA. And so

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you know, it's part of developing a good relationship with the youth and with the children that are out there is that we see some of us humbling ourselves and showing some you know, softness and kindness to the children that are around. So when you see children, the prophets all along, it was so nice to see children he would greet them he would talk to them he would speak to them nicely. You know, he would, he would show them love, you would show them love. And what happens there is that they learn to first of all love the deen they love the people of the deen right? They see people who are religious people who have some sort of morals and values that are divine that come from Allah

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subhanho wa Taala they will no love those people. And when I say love, I mean they're drawn closer to them, they want to be around them, they want to they want to be like them maybe right because they're, they see the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in those people. And so they're drawn closer to them, and they want to, you know,

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spend some time with them, or chill with them.

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And so this is a element of learning how to teach morals and etiquettes to those children that are around in our society. Now we look at

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a specific topic.

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a person who's mature,

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give sell them to a child,

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a child, give xlm to someone who's mature

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for hell yajirobe rod descent M. and Ethan, is it compulsory to reply to the cnm? in those two cases, or not? So if there's someone who is mature, someone who's older and adult, gives them to a child, must the child respond to the Senate? And in the second scenario, if a child gives selam to an adult, must the adult respond to the setup of the child? Because a adults are at a higher level, right? You know, they're like so much better than children. So, what is the answer to it?

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either send them a valid one. So if someone who is mature and adult, give CLM to a child, okay.

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It is not compulsory for that child to respond to the synonym of the adult. Why? Who knows? Who knows the answer to this. So let me say this again.

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If an adult gives CLM to a child,

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it is not compulsory or not necessary for the child to respond to the celem of the adult. Why?

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Who knows? Just guess, take wild guesses at this right? try and figure out why. Why is it not compulsory for the child or not necessary for the child to respond to the Senate of the adults? Why do you think

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Come on Come on. That's what your chat session or your chat section is for, you know, the comments. Type it in there. I know you guys type of really fast, right?

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Okay, maybe the child is not aware of the etiquettes

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because he's not accountable or duty bound until he grows up. Okay. Anyone else? A third person maybe.

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Although there's so many of you on and no one wants to guess at this one.

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All right. So Jamie agrees with Abdullah Camilla. Manal says,

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By child Do you mean someone who's younger or child like before puberty I mean like a child before puberty. Okay, child before puberty.

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Give them grace. And maybe they didn't hear

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You okay, because the child

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is young and still learning. Okay. It's not Wajid. Any tips or hints. All right?

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Well, you guessed it, you got it. I wouldn't say that, you guessed it, I would say that you applied the knowledge you already learned.

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If a child is not of the age of maturity, right, they haven't reached that level of maturity, then they're not held accountable for their actions. Therefore, the child

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does not have to technically respond to the setup of the adults.

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So it's not compulsory for the child to respond. Is it good for the child to respond? Yes. Is it preferable for the child to respond? Yes, of course. Absolutely. But should we get really angry and upset if the child doesn't respond? No. Why? Because the child is still the child. The child is still the child, we should ask the child or remind the child, right say I said said um,

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said I'm already gone. Hello, I'm here. Right? Sometimes you come home and say set up and your family just doesn't care. Like hello, how are they come here? Oh, why don't you come Sam didn't even know you came in. Right? And so so have a lot, it's important for us to understand who we are talking to. And if it's even compulsory for them to respond. Now let's take the second example.

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If the child gives Selim

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to an adult,

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does the adult have to respond to the child?

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I'll answer for you. To save time. Yes, okay, the adult does respond to the sap why First of all, the adult is receiving set out, even though they're receiving setup from a child, they're receiving setup. And it's the right of another of another believer and other Muslim to have their setup responded to. And so the adult responds to the setup. Okay, the adult responds to the setup of the child, not only because they you know, it's the rights of the other person, but

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because you want to teach the child that you have to respond to the setup. So if children come home and get set up, and their parents never respond to their setup, and then when the parents come home, and they give some time, and the child doesn't respond, the parents get upset right away. They're like, you didn't you didn't reply to my son. And I said, said I'm already come to you, how come you don't reply? And a child who's clever will say, but that you never say said, You never reply to our send them anyways. And the father says, Why don't have to your children, I'm an adult? No, you should, you should you receive the center. And so you return the center, okay, you receive the

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setup. So you return the set up, because it's the right of a Muslim upon another right? that the system is responded to when they give it. And also because you as the adult want to teach the child some morals and values and etiquettes. And so you want to respond to their sent them so that they can learn about the importance of replying to send them. Okay. And so, you know, a lot of the time when we're talking about our Dean or learning our Dean, we won't dissect these things, right, in general conferences, or talks or lectures or clip was, you know, you just mentioned something we should get sent out. But usually, we don't look at it this way. We don't like break things down. And

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that's the beauty of having these classes that sometimes we can break things down and try to understand them a little bit more in depth and make us think make us think a little bit more you know about how things are happening.

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Okay, the next topic that we'll discuss in Sharla is

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giving selam to people who are awake, in an area where there are some people who are sleeping. So for example, you come home or you walk into a room, and

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you know, some of your children let's say you have two children sleeping in a room right two brothers are sleeping in the same room or two sisters sleeping in the same room. And you know, the parent or the adult comes home goes upstairs sees them to set them or icon, should you say send them so loud that it wakes up the person sleeping because it's your right to have your senate responded to? Or should you not say send them or should you say send them quietly and silently. So the answer to that is if you walk into a room or you're in an area where some people are sleeping, you should give senem in a way that the people who are awake will hear your senem and reply to it. But the

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people who are sleeping will not be disturbed by your setup

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and a beautiful example

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is if you go for hedge and you're sharing a hotel room with other people, right, other people who are not family to you, usually there's always this clash, right? It's like all men, you know, this person snores and that person bangs the door and this person comes in and just says I'm out loud, and that person likes AC, and this person hates AC. And that person likes to eat in the middle of the night, and this person has to wake up every two hours to take their pills. And that person is coming and going and getting Uber dropped off. And you know, all this beautiful food coming and going from the room, and the other person doesn't shower properly, and then this person makes a mess

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in the bathroom. And that person does this, and everyone has their own thing, right? Every single person is different. Everyone has their own sort of, you know, ways that they're used to doing in their personal life. Now you go for Hajj, and you're sharing rooms together. Okay, you're sharing a hotel room together. And you have to live with each other for the next two to three weeks. Right? You're going to travel and buses together, you're going to sleep side by side and Mina, you're going to be in a hotel room. So Pamela, all of these things that I'm telling you actually do happen when you go for Hajj people are like, you know, they're just kind of a lot. There's so many things that

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you deal with so many different kinds of people. So

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are so many different habits that people have, I should say.

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And so what do you do? This is where like I said, if you walk into your room, let's say you go for Hajj, and you went to the gym and you come back and you're going into your room, you open the door quietly, right? You go into your room. And you see two of your roommates are sleeping, and one of them is awake.

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And you look at that when you say

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and you say it in a way that's quiet enough, just quiet enough for him to hear. But so quiet that the other two that are sleeping, don't even hear it like they're not disturbed by it. And we see that this happened during the time of the prophet SAW whether it was Sunday,

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I will make that as what are the alaba. And he said we used to reserve for the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam his share of milk. Okay, so they used to keep his share of milk until he would come. And he would come right, he says, and he would come at night and offer greetings in such a manner as it did not disturb those who were asleep. And it was heard only by those who were awake. So it was heard only by those awake. So he gave senem so silently, that the people who were awake, were able to hear it and to respond to it. But the people that were sleeping, didn't even know that he had entered the room. Right? didn't even know that he had entered the room.

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And so, you know, that's the way that we give setup. Now someone's asking right can it be done in gestures and not using our voice? Remember, we said set em should be given with our voice we should say I said Mr. La come. And one of the topics that we're going to look at very shortly is getting set down by gestures only right?

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All these gestures that people give, right? And so No, that is and somehow you'd be surprised as a Habib, someone who delivers a Juma hook, but you'd be surprised how many people during the clip bow they're like, oh, we're not allowed to speak and they're just sitting there doing gestures non stop. It's like, Come on, guys. You're not even supposed to be giving gestures at each other. So

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we're gonna look at that shortly and shot a lot of data, but generally the setup is supposed to be given, you know, verbally out loud spoken, okay? It's supposed to be spoken. All right.

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The next topic that we will look at is shot long to Hana.

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How it is not from the dean to

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giving salemme to the non believer. And what we mean by this is actually saying a Salaam or alikhan. So we don't greet a non Muslim with a Salam or Aleikum because that is the greetings of the Muslims. Right? That's the greetings of the Muslims as salaamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatuh.

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So the answer there is, can we you know, walk into I don't know anonymous Sims office, for example. And they're sitting there and you say said Mr. Icahn. No, because that's not a greeting of the believer to the non believer. That's a greeting for the Muslim to the Muslim right or the believer to the believer. But what we can do is,

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is say something like Good morning, how are you? How's everything right? something other than

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Salam or aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. Okay, so yes, the Muslim can begin greeting the person but we don't greet the non Muslim with a set Mr. And Aiko, we greet with. Good morning. Hello, how are you? How's it going? How's things? How's family? What's up? How's the weather today? You know how just the other day one of the brothers was saying he's like, Canada's an awesome country. Anyone can have a conversation with anyone. All you need to do is talk about the weather. So how's the weather outside today? Oh, it's freezing cold? What's the weather like outside? It's not too bad. What's the weather like outside? You know, it's like, you feel awkward? You're in an awkward

00:30:37--> 00:30:40

situation. No problem. Your bail out is

00:30:41--> 00:30:48

weather. Talk about the weather, right Canadian weather. It's like a hot topic. So does the Muslim

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you know, begin greeting the non Muslim with SNM or anything? No, because that's not the salutation of the non Muslim widow with a Muslim right.

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Now what about meeting someone who's non Muslim and they give you center? They the non Muslim gives the Muslim center. You know, if the non Muslim rocks into a Muslims office, or the Muslim walks into a non Muslims office, right, the same example we use before you walk into an office that's anonymous and like, Hey, how's it going to like oh Salam aleikum. Right. What do you say to that person? Well, we see that hadith of anessa been Malik de Lago and where he says the prophets, the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said,

00:31:37--> 00:31:45

he does send an early commanded Kitab for pulu while a con if a non believer or someone from a who keytab

00:31:46--> 00:31:52

Jewish Christian says a seller morality come to you then respond to them by saying why they come.

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And upon you, right? There. They're saying something, they might think they're saying something or they might have an idea of what they're saying in Arabic, maybe they don't speak Arabic, but they heard Muslims saying it. So respond to them by saying and upon you, right? They're saying a door upon us and you say why they come and upon you, right?

00:32:13--> 00:32:13


00:32:16--> 00:32:59

What if you hear a non Muslim? Or you have a friend who's non Muslim or a family member, relative, a neighbor, someone who's not Muslim, but when they give you some m, they pronounce it? 100%? Correct. They say a set M or LA con, or a salaam aleikum. Right, as best as they can. Right? Or, you know, it's kind of like we just put a little bit of effort into it, it's so easy for everyone to try and to learn different languages. We just need to like sort of tune our ears and tweak our tongues to it. And so if there is ever a time where a non Muslim comes in and doesn't say a Cem, why they come like what was done to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. Right, like a curse me, may you be

00:32:59--> 00:33:42

poisoned kind of thing. If someone is saying something nice, right? They're anonymous. Um, but they're, they're trying hard to say a set m where it can properly should we respond to that person with why they come? Or should we respond and say why they call the center? Well, the scholars actually differ on this in the case that a person says this lm property right, they say the centum property. So there are some scholars who say, if they say the senem properly, then it is permissible for the Muslim to respond with ya commerce center. Okay. However, the majority of the scholars say no, because of the presence of that heads that we quoted earlier of onus and bid Malik are the one

00:33:42--> 00:33:58

where the prophets on a longer Eddie he was seldom said, if you're greeted by someone who's, you know, not a believer, then you should say, why they come, then because of that Heidi's we should act upon that Hadees. And if someone says Salaam Alaikum, even if they're pronouncing it properly, we say why they

00:33:59--> 00:34:25

said, and upon you, right? They're saying something nice, may you be blessed, and may you be blessed as well. Right? What our definition of blessing is, is slightly different than their definition of blessing, no problem. But you're saying that to me, and upon you, right. And so that's what the majority of the scholars say, with regards to send them to the non believer, okay to the non believer. Now, we look at another topic.

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What if you come into a room?

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Or there's a gathering or a meeting, right? You come into a room, and there's a mixture of Muslims, and Jewish and Christians and polytheists, right? idol worshipers, whatever, Moshe Cohen, right? You come into a room and there's a mixture of Muslims and non Muslims. Can you say send them out loud? Should we as Muslims say sent on to the entire congregation. Sometimes you'll notice

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A meme or someone is invited to do a lecture somewhere. And there's a group of people in front of the congregation in front now might be a dinner or wedding or something. And there are Muslims and non Muslims. Is it permissible to say SLM or na come to all of them? Or should we just not say sent him because hey, there's Muslims and non Muslims. This is where islamically we are encouraged, as was the practice of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam before but though, right, he, you know, went to an area,

00:35:34--> 00:35:36

the area of

00:35:39--> 00:35:51

Bernal had it, it never has an edge. And you know, when he got there, you know, there are Muslims, non Muslims, Jewish, and so on and so forth. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam gave Salaam to everyone.

00:35:53--> 00:35:53


00:35:54--> 00:36:37

that's evidence that is permissible. If you enter upon a gathering or a group of people, and there are some Muslims, and some non Muslims, then we can say set them because our intention is to give them to the believers. And then to say, Good morning, how are you? How's everyone? You know, hope everything is good? You know, Greetings to everyone. Right? So you greet everyone, but you say sent me specifically to Muslims that are there. So these are basically just etiquettes that we learn about our Deen about giving Salaam how to give them when to give, send them what to say when send them is given to us how to respond to it, and so on and so forth. I did see some questions going up

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there in a few different places. I'm going to ask you to hold off any questions for more minutes and shut up? And then I will answer those questions shot a long time. So remember, the intention is to basically give setup to the believers that are there, the Muslims that are there, and to say something nice in terms of a greeting to the non Muslims that are there as well. Remember, as Muslims, we have to be presentable. Right, we have to be presentable.

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And the last thing that we'll look at, because it sort of ties into the topic, I didn't really want to touch upon it today, I wanted to end where we just finished, you know, with what we just finished discussing, but I'll end with with something else. inshallah. Tada, let me just write this down December

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18 2020.

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Okay, so the last thing that we'll take for today is the permissibility of giving selam.

00:37:35--> 00:37:36


00:37:38--> 00:37:44

an ishara, right, a gesture, you meet someone that Muslim, they're far away.

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Right. Or like my African, you know, friends, in Medina, what they used to do is some kind of love whenever we meet each other, or they'd see us from far away, because our buildings are far, sometimes you're on your balcony. And you know, your friend is on his balcony and in a different building. And we used to see each other and the Africans, they go like this, I go like, this is like their way, I'll just do this. It's like their way of getting set up. So I want to go, right. And so we just go to Santa Monica. And then you'll see some people where they go like this, right?

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And so how is this something that's permissible islamically, it's only something that should be done. In the case of a necessity or in the in the time or the opportunity that you don't have, let me rephrase is only permissible or only should be done. When you don't have the ability to verbally say Selim or you don't have the ability for the person to hear your setup. Right? Maybe there's a gathering that's going on, you don't want to disturb the gathering, it's a meaning a conference or something and you see someone someone makes eye contact with you in the distance.

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Right? So you move your mouth still, you say sit down with your mouth, but you you will gesture, use your hand to gesture, or did you know, as a symbol I'm giving you set up? Right? You raise your hands and mRNA come right and that is something that is permissible to do only in the case of a necessity. Remember, we should not try to take away that verbal statement of senem because of some other reason, okay.

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And we should give senem

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verbally, as much as we can whenever we can, except in the case that we can't. Okay. So, you know, like I said, sometimes it's like this, some people will go like this, right, which I'm not really a fan of is kind of like What's this? Like? What's up, man? You know, for me, it's more like said Mr. decom. Right. And remember this This in itself, in some cultures, some customs is I have nothing to harm you. I come with peace, right? I come peacefully. I have no weapon in my hand. There's nothing. My hand is open. Right and free of that.

00:40:00--> 00:40:42

any harm to you send mRNA unless you're going to slap them. That's a different story. Right? But send him article and that's that right? Africa send money. How are you? Right? Is to do this is to go over their heads and I'm learning right? From the law. Every culture has their way. But we should still say send them out loud. Why? Because a solo or le con 10 has a net. I sell Mr. Le camara to 120 has entered a cell Mr. La cumbre de La Habra, Ca 230 has a net. Okay. And yes, Abdullah said he had some some people, you know, this is the integral, right? greeting when I come into most of our homes like to guru

00:40:43--> 00:40:52

Wiley como Salaam to YouTube at Google. My name a to grow. Okay. So it's kind of like every time I come in the masjid, there's always some brothers like

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yes, Netflix to YouTube.

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So hot a lot. So that's all that we're going to take for today. We'll open it up for some questions. inshallah, if anyone has any questions, Allah subhanho wa Taala make it easy for us to continue to learn the deen and to understand the small little, you know, aspects of this Deen that make it so beautiful, and make us as believers shine. Really when we learn these etiquettes and we learn about Islam we learn what's right and we stay away from what's wrong and you know, stay away from what the prophet SAW long I didn't send him didn't do and we try our best to even go out of our way a little bit to do what Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam did. That's where the Nur comes into our lives.

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That's where we begin to shine. That's where Allah subhanho wa Taala you know, polishes us up, we're becoming polished. Right? And we shine and we glow. And that's, you know, the beauty of this Deen unless we try to make it easy for us.

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Okay, so questions. I answered all of these inshallah.

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All right, let me see what's here.

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Is it wrong to say Santa Monica instead of Santa Monica? de la hora capital? A, so Sr. afreen? Or Efrain? Are you asking if it's wrong to say, said Mr. alikum. When greeting a Muslim, like from Muslim to a Muslim? Because if that's the case, then no, it's not wrong. But you only get 10 rewards. Okay, like I just finished saying. So if someone comes in and says I said Mr. Icahn,

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then they're only getting 10 rewards for their setup. If they say said I'm already familiar with the law, they're getting 20 rewards, and they'll get full rewards if they say I said, Mr. Eddie come out to LA he will got a category. That's 30 rewards for saying more than saying less. Okay.

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Um, what did you say before the north part before the north part? I don't know. What did I say before the north part?

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What was I saying? What was the saying was saying these are small little things little etiquettes that if we learn we implement in our lives, you know, it brings out the normal within us. I don't really remember what I was saying just before that.

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Maybe someone else can can remind you. I think that's pretty much what I was saying. When people type out there, send them on WhatsApp or Instagram, it is necessary. Is it necessary that we type out the reply or can we respond verbally, although they won't hear it? Okay. Very good. So it's encouraged that we respond to someone send them when they type A said Mr. Lee, come on, you know, social media, or they're messaging us on Instagram or WhatsApp, for example. It's encouraged that we respond to their senem with Senate.

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Now, one thing that and I spoke about this, I think two weeks ago, what really bothers me is when people just right like SLM was Okay, so now you want me to respond, why they come? Listen, I'm going from too long ago, but I can't and all you had to write was SLM. Or someone writes sit down as a lamb or Sal AM. It's like, okay, so would you like me to say, well, Sam, because I would love for you to say a set mRNA come and say that to me, right? Say so that, you know, I am also receiving those blessings, not just like, peace. Yeah, peace, do you too. But I want more than that, right? I want to send them or

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at least at the very least, and so I encourage everyone if you're going to be writing send them to someone on social media that you do not write send them I made this a habit with myself. And I could probably count the amount of times in the last 2345 years maybe that I've written send them only write I usually write a salon where they come and respond, why they become a center. And if they you know write more than you try and respond with the full sentiment as well.

00:44:55--> 00:44:59

Now, is it compulsory or can we simply just respond

00:45:00--> 00:45:30

You know, with the question that's asked, so if someone types outside Mr. alikom, I usually say what Alec was set up. So when I'm reading an exam, I can set up right, and and just move on. So don't assume that the person did not sometimes people write to you and like, somebody from shift can ask you a question. And I'll write back because I get like 100 emails, you know, or messages and stuff like that, more than that, in a day get over 200 300 in one day. And you know, people send me a message sent. Oh, can I ask you a question?

00:45:31--> 00:45:53

You just did. You just ask me a question. You're asking me a question with a question. Or you're asking me if you can ask me a question, but you just did. And so sometimes I'll just be like, yes. Or please do, or Bismillah, right? And they'll reply and say, I stuff that a lot. I said, send them to you, and you didn't reply to my set out.

00:45:54--> 00:46:13

Now, you're just wasting my time. Right? Now you're just wasting my time, I understand that if you gave them to someone, then they probably responded to your setup verbally, which is even better, why they come set up right? Now for you to say, set them can ask you a question. And then the person answers your question. Right.

00:46:15--> 00:46:46

But you don't care about that question. You're going back to Okay, now you it's like, you know what, you're just wasting my time. Like, I don't even want to answer your question now. And so so Pamela, you know, we need to, we need to be understanding of each other. And you know, what, when they do ask a question, I will answer it, right? I will, whenever I have the time and ability, I will. And I know some of you are probably going to message me now and be like, I asked you a question six months ago, you never responded to me. I know. I get hundreds a day. Sometimes I don't get to answer it today. And I get busy The next day, and then it gets bumped down. If I didn't answer it today or see

00:46:46--> 00:46:53

your message today. It's going 200 messages down tomorrow. And if I don't get it tomorrow, it's going another 200 messages down by then it's gone.

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There's a rare chance that I'll respond to it. But the question there is, should we type out the full senem? Yes. And when I say the full set, um, I mean, a salon where alikhan is sufficient. Right? And then if someone wants to say why they come sit down, they can't or why they come I said I'm gonna have to look around ecommerce similar to like your cattle, they can, okay.

00:47:17--> 00:47:30

Some people get frustrated when we don't take out some response and they make us type it in full. Okay, so I just finished answering that. How about some people put hand on forehead and say a dub?

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dub? Is that permissible? They put their hand on their forehead. What do they do like this?

00:47:40--> 00:48:17

Well, if that's their culture, and this means that um, then then, like we said, that could be used from a distance when you can't hear or there's no option except to do this right. I see some brothers they come in and they're like, you know, you standing like just after also today a brother was walking out. I think it was also one of the prayers you know, brother was walking out and he went like this and I guess is because you know, Salah finished want to be quiet. We're still in the masjid area, you know, so he just went like that and I was like, Sam already come. He's at Quantico center. And then we just went on our way, right? So say setup, there's nothing wrong with saying

00:48:17--> 00:48:18

setup, okay.

00:48:22--> 00:48:37

truehd Nair said I'm going to LA con la como selam. Metal, ye overcast. Chinese Muslims can't say it properly. They say salia Lee Kong okay Mashallah.

00:48:41--> 00:48:46

It's a hydro thing and on head. I had I had a Chinese classmate

00:48:48--> 00:49:11

who was gone was awesome. I had a Chinese roommate for a few months when I was a student in Medina, is a graduate from the faculty of Hadith. And his pronounciation was super super good. His Arabic was polished. I saw lots of Akuma alright shift of the Roman liability. We have circled the Roman on here by the way, guys, if you didn't know check out the Roman ciao.

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If you respond to send them when they come with Salaam or alikum Is that fine? No.

00:49:22--> 00:49:29

So we learned that if you if you respond to someone Salaam you should say y la como seller. Okay.

00:49:30--> 00:49:35

Si y la casilla. We meant that last week, I believe we can go back and watch those videos inshallah.

00:49:36--> 00:49:43

All right, I think that is it is you're applying from the law instead of an hamdulillah sin

00:49:46--> 00:49:49

is replying hamdulillah to sell them.

00:49:53--> 00:49:55

If you're just saying ham, the law

00:49:58--> 00:49:59

is it the same

00:50:00--> 00:50:05

has a little bit of a lesser value to it. Al hamdu Lillah right.

00:50:06--> 00:50:12

Has has more value to it you could say if we were to just simply answer that, okay.

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All right, that's all the time that we have for today. And all the questions that I see came out to where answerde does not come a level higher than for attending about a cup of coffee calm. I look forward to seeing you all on Sunday for our essential fit class. And that will be at the same time eight o'clock pm fic and we're going through the chapter of marriage shot a lot so I'll see all of you there and we'll catch up soon vertical low FICO, or some level or send them all about account and Amina Mohammed why that it was it was a limb, which is a qumulo Hayden said Mr Alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh