Prison Break – Lessons from Surah Yusuf and my time in prison
Channel: Yusha Evans
File Size: 49.55MB
Assalamu alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh
How's everyone are hamdulillah Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah. While early he was definitely a Jamaican woman, well, I'm a bad
Caden, Prison Break. Yeah, sounds like should be on like Sky TV or something like that.
Anyway, we're going to talk about some a few lessons from the story of sort of the use of, for those of you who know me for a long time, you know that I tell you 1000 times, I'm not sure if I'm no scholar, I'm not going to give you any deep, you know, analytical analysis of the Quran or the Hadith, but I try to make things relatable in a manner that I think that can benefit you in sha Allah Jota Ana, taking what ALLAH SubhanA wa Taala has said, what His Messenger lays it out to Sudan has said, and how we can apply those in our day to day lives. That's my mission in life. That's my goal.
Before we get too far into it, how many of you saw my prison tape series on YouTube? Raise your hand
hamdulillah only a couple so you get to get to get to surprise some people tonight in sha Allah, you guys know what the surprise anyway. Okay, most of you know the URL. Let me turn these Instagram comments off real quick. There we go. Most of you know the story of sort of the use of you know, the story of use if you know the story from the Quran. But I want to try to break down a few points that I think have some value and have some benefit to them in sha Allah Who to Anna.
You know, the story where Yusuf had his dream and told his father about his dream that that that the great things were planned for his life and his father
knew his other sons as well. You see, this is the thing, the wisdom of listening to our parents sometimes, right? Yeah. His father knew his other two sons. And he was like, Yeah, you know, his other brothers. He's like, don't tell your brothers about this dream. They're gonna become jealous of you. And subhanAllah he told them anyway. And what ended up happening I'm trying to I'm gonna paraphrase so we can get to the lessons they took him out said we're gonna go and you know, take him in. And we know they dumped him in a week, they found a well through a minute, went back home lie to the Father said a wolf at broke, broke his father's heart to the point that he became blind.
The lesson we learned from this is be careful who you trust. Those who are closest to you can do the most damage. Those who are closest to you are able to do the most damage to you why? Because there is a level of vulnerability to people that you allow in your inner circle and especially your family, especially your family. Family can sometimes be your greatest test. I do counseling on online every single day. That's somewhat my nine to five. And there are so many times where people are coming to me because their biggest test in their life, their family.
That also reminds us of being very, very careful of who we allow into our inner circle, who we allow into our inner circle of friends, meaning people whom you give vulnerability to people who you allow close enough to you to harm you. Those people better be chosen very carefully. Because if you choose those people wrong, it can be the disaster of your life. choose your friends wisely. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, You are the dean of your ASVAB your companions you are the dean of your friends. He also told us very very clearly to be careful about who he chooses friends that the good friend is like the seller of musk and the bad friend is like the blacksmith and I have time to
go into detail about that but it means very, very specifically, be careful whom you befriend careful whom you befriend. Now his brothers thought they had left him for dead right? Totally left him for dead Nakuru. Oh my god Allah they plan on Allah plans Allah has planned and I've talked about that, I think a couple of years ago in this semester about the plan of Allah subhanho wa Taala and how perfect it is for us.
As he was there in hanging in the will, along came some traders from Egypt and they saw Him they went to get some water and they pulled up the bucket. They're like Melissa some heavy water Ray like pulling it up like Man, this water is stupid heavy. You pull it up use I'm saying get onto the bucket. And so what do they do? They take him and they sell him into slavery. Sell him into slavery. So Yusuf alayhi salam becomes a slave.
And as this time in slavery, he is purchased by someone very prominent in the Kingdom of Egypt, the treasure of the man. And he became very useful to him. He loved him, he ended up falling in love with them like you would love a son. He loved he gave him such he wasn't like as if he was a slave anymore. It was as if he was part of his own family. Unfortunately, his wife, Aziz, his wife liked him more than nothing as he said she liked him to the point of wanting to sleep with him. And I'm sure she devised many games in her mind played with him. She tried
To seduce him, and we know that Allah subhana wa Allah said he protected him from this. He refused her, he stayed away from it. There is a reason, brothers, brothers, there is a reason why use a fillet Sudan is praised by his ability to resist the wife of the disease, because this temptation is one of the greatest temptations that can be put before a man. There are three things that a man is greatly tested with in this life, money, power, and with power becomes fame, fame, power, and all that that comes with it, and women. And of those three, the Prophet alayhi salatu salam said, I leave behind me no greater test. After I'm gone, there'll be no greater test for you than the test
of women. So he turned from her and ran and she grabbed a shirt from behind and tore it right. And then when it was found out, this whole commotion took place she she tried to blame him, right, this also is another lesson I'm not going to go too deep into that because you get that I can't put the video on YouTube.
We learned that in a trial of a very famous man not too long ago. Can't believe everything that comes out of every person's mouth. Allah subhanho wa Taala says if someone brings you information, especially someone who's not known to you, not known to you, you don't know this person, they're not someone you know, to be truth worthy and pious and righteous and right. What does it last depend on without a say, verify that information, verify that information and listed in case you harm people unjustly but act on information that's not verified? That is the internet these days unverified information, almost all of it,
but you sit defending himself defending himself and and and as these didn't know what to do. So he asked one of his closest advisors, you know the story, he said, if it's if shirt tore from the front, then he's lying. If your shirts tore from the back, she's lying. And it was torn from the back. So he let it be. But then his wife was being made fun of right, everybody was making fun of her that look, you know, she's trying to seduce her servant boy there. And you know, the very famous story that she wanted to kind of defend herself. So she's out, okay, you think you can resist him? So she had a party. She brought all of her these girls who were making fun of her. She invited them
all to the party.
And after they were all there and you know, they were doing their thing cutting things and cutting food. She told him said burrito uses to come in. So when he walked in the room when they do the slice the hands, the beauty that was given to us today, Sarah, and our Prophet SAW Allah had sent him even more so. But he was so beautiful. And the women were after that were kind of like, alright, we get it. You know, I mean, like, bro, you know, I mean, like, this man is something else. He's like a painting SubhanAllah. But after a period of time, the scandal became too great. It was too much scandal going on. And his wife told Aziz that the only way you're going to protect me from this
scandal is if you imprison him, that's it. And so as he's gave in and had him in prison, even though it broke his heart, he didn't want to do it. But he chose his wife, over his servant.
Macro macro Allah so use, of course from his father's house, betrayed by his brothers, fallen into a well dug out of it, thrown into slavery, being accused of sleeping with the wife advisees being found out to be innocent by those who are close around him to now end up he's in prison, right?
But Yusuf is patient with Allah subhanho wa Taala and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said when Allah tests the believer, the believer is patient with Allah and Allah rewards him for his patients. In the prison he was given the ability to interpret dreams, he's able to correctly interpret people's dreams. And two people came to him and told him their dream and one of them he said you will become very prominent the other one you're going to lose your life they're going to crucify you and and birds are going to pick it your head
the one who would become very prominent would come to work for the king and use if the only thing you asked in return for he said, When you get out of here, tell the king about me, you know, I mean, like just mentioned in me to him, like I've got nothing here. I got no one to help me here. Nobody in this land even knows me.
But the man forgot, right? And then after a while the king started have very disturbing dreams, disturbing dreams and started asking people what are what are the interpretation of these dreams? And that's when it the young man remember, it's a panel. I know this kid named Yusuf in the prison who does this? So he told him, there is a man in prison who can interpret dreams very correctly. He interpreted my dream correctly and my friends correctly as well. He's not here with this anymore.
So he said Bring him to me. So use of was sent for in the prison, right? And most of us would think Subhanallah that's it we free right? Most of us we dive out the door as soon as they unlocked it. But what did you say? No, I'm not leaving this without my honor. Because a man's honor is important. You have to remember that mother's Your Honor is important. And your honor belongs to Allah subhanho wa Taala known Allah is dual. He's the owner of honor and dignity. You're not going to get your honor
on these red pill movements and all these guys online and masculinity, your honor comes from Allah subhanho wa Taala that's your is that is your own. He said I'm not leaving this prison without my honor and being proved innocent of those charges but in the king really wanted to know his dream right. So he said, Okay, he brought the women who around you know, as eases handmaidens as they call them her house. And they said no, we don't know anything of this will use of except good. We know nothing Allah reports in the Quran we know nothing about him from good. So then, as these his wife was brought under threat of punishment, telling me the truth about this young man, and she finally
admitted it and said no, I was the liar he was the truthful one. So his honor was restored to him and he was brought any interpretive the king's dreams very well. And the king made him a very prominent member of his kingdom in charge of the storehouse is in charge of many things. And to paraphrase to get to the end, we know that eventually his brothers, they would become a famine in the land and his brothers would come looking for food from the King, and who was in charge of distributing it use if he saw his brothers right.
Recognize them immediately. How did he behave? Most of us? Most of
you need some funa. Like me, maybe he told me the will throw him in prison chuckle. No. Yusuf was wise. Allah subhanho wa Taala had guidance him and give it in him given him wisdom. So what did he do? He helped them. But He also inquired about, you know, a family as you've, you know, your father, etc, this and that. And he said, he's good. He's still alive. So he wanted, he had a plan now use a scatter plan. So what does he do? He takes a valuable piece of from the king and he puts it in their bag of food, right? And then snitches on him and snitches on him. And so they get arrested. They get arrested, and they're asking for help. And you said, Donna, we're going to help you specifically
father comes and they said, give my father give your father the shirt and etc. You know, the story, right? It's father's site was returned to him, his father came, and his dream was fulfilled, his dream was fulfilled.
The lesson that I want to tell you brothers tonight, is that circumstances aren't always what they seem. The last time we talked, I think I talked about trust in the planet, the law, this time, I'm gonna tell you that circumstances aren't always what they seem. We live in an age today. Where real is subjective. Subhanallah seriously, real, what is real and what is not really subjective. What's real to one person is not real to another. What is truth to one person is lies to another. We live in a world where it's upside down topsy turvy, we live in a world where you don't even know what you can believe anymore. You see a video of somebody online, you can't even take that information
anymore. They have deep fakes that are just as good as the real thing. Maybe even better, they might make you look better and your deep fake, then you wouldn't real video. So we live in a world where reality is becoming skewed.
This is where we have to fall back on what we know to be factual without a shadow of a doubt. And the only thing in this world that is factual, with a shadow of a doubt, is the deen of Islam, the deen of Islam, that is based upon immutable evidences that are in the Quran.
Calam Allah, the words of Allah subhanho wa Taala Anna, in the immutable evidence of the authentic narrations and Sunnah of the Prophet alayhi salaatu wa salaam, that's it. That's what the believer has to fall back on. That's all we have. Everything else these days is subjective. It is subjective, and it is hearsay and you should take it all with a grain of salt.
I came to Islam 24 years ago, December, this past December 24 years ago. And I've told my story about how I came to slam many, many times.
Most of you may have heard it. And I'm glad that hamdulillah people don't ask me to tell that story anymore. Because I've told it so many times. Now. It just becomes you can watch it online.
But one thing that I never told people, and I did this off the advice of one of my earliest teachers. He said, Just just keep this information to yourself because you don't want your work to be based upon this. You don't want your data to be based upon this. You want that you want it to be based upon your works and not upon things that you've done or haven't done.
How many of you heard my story about how I came to Islam? Raise your hand.
If you haven't go google how the Bible led me to Islam on YouTube, you'll find about 100 versions Subhanallah but I talked about in my story about how I beat a young man up at the payphone. Right You guys remember that?
Young man would not get off the payphone when I wanted him to and I was a very angry young man and I and I had a black belt in martial arts and that's a very that's a very dangerous combination.
So I very quickly made him get off the payphone. He ended up in hospital.
Two months after becoming a muslim.
At the end of February, I became Muslim December 1990, February 1999. Because I never talked about in the story, whatever, what was the outcome of the whole situation was lifted? Yeah.
In 1999, I had to go to court for this. And this man's father was a judge. He wasn't the judge that saw the case, because that would be a conflict of interest. But he was a judge in the same district.
I went to court, you know, I had just become a new Muslim. And I was trying to learn about the deen where I lived, it was very hard, very hard to learn about Islam. Like, there was just like, there was nobody to teach me about the deen, there was really nothing. I was learning how to pray from books and online. You know, when I was being given books by by Sufis, I was getting books by Shri as I was like, I don't know, what is what here, and I was just trying my hardest.
When I went into court that day,
I thought, you know, I've done the right thing and accepted Islam and Hamdulillah. You know, I mean, I, all my past sins are forgiven, you know, I'm gonna go to this courtroom, and you know, it's all gonna go, so we're gonna go good, I'm probably gonna get like some probation or a slap on the wrist, who knows, I had a decent lawyer. And then you know, I'm gonna go about my business in sha Allah. I went into the courtroom. And the judge had already decided my sentence, before I even got in there, I didn't really matter what my lawyer said,
sentenced me to seven years in prison.
Five of those years will be served in prison, and two of those would be served on probation. It's called a suspended sentence, seven years suspended to five with two years on probation.
And I'm thinking to myself,
this is Lan things are working in this point. You know, this is not this is not really, I was like, you know, Allah, what did you know? What did I do here? What I do wrong? It wasn't what I did wrong. It's what I've done, right?
I went on from February of 1999. To September of 2002, to serve those years in the South Carolina Department of Corrections. Yes, whether you should have been the prison. When I talk about, you know, a lot of times you guys hear me, especially the youth talk about the street life and, and how to be tough and hard. I'm not telling you these things, because I read them in a book. I'm telling you things because I've lived in. And I know a lot of our youth out there running around want to be so called, you know, gangsters, road, man, whatever you want to have it. You know, and I'm telling you, most of you, and I think prisons here in Britain are a little bit more pushy, you know, most
you're not built for real prison, mostly not built for real prison.
So I started to serve my five year sentence. And it became the reason why I do what I do today. I think it was the reason why I was able to continue to be Muslim. In Greenville, South Carolina, how much of my Islam would I really learn for the next five years, or four years, eight months, whatever you want to call it. For the next five years, I spent every single waking hour of my life, in books and in tapes. And in the writings of the scholars every single waking hour. That was one thing that all the brothers who know me for quite a period of time in prison, they're like, if you see you SHA he's got his face. And men don't even know what's going on around him. I had my face in a book. And
when I finished that book, I would get another book and I would order another book everybody else when they got money, you know to spend on commissary and shoes, I spent it on books. I spent it on books I would send out that was back in the day you had to send out mail in order forms of the money order and go up to the prison officers asked for money order to be cut, and I'd sent it off to get books. And I was the one person who the warden actually gave me permission to have more than 15 books you only let out 15 books. I was like 15 is not enough. So he just gave me permission then they then I ended up working in the library. I got a job in the library Subhanallah and then the
library I used to take my stash of books because he gave me an allowance of 30 I had like 70 and I would take the other 40 and put them in my office in the library because the library nobody know the difference between any books in the library. But I would spend the next five years deep in studying the deen of Allah subhana wa to Anna, I would be connected with people. There is a brother that I've known. Ever since I became Muslim. He was the former chaplain for the South Carolina Department of Corrections. His name is Malta history. He was a very close student until this day still is of Sheikh Mohammed say that Edley. I don't know if any of you know who Muhammad said Adly is but if you
do you know he's a no holds barred no games played Imam and if you don't go look up his stuff, masha Allah may Allah bless him. He used to come and visit regularly and give me books and tell me what kind of books and Asha Hadley questions from me and and in correspondence and I used to write back and forth to him. So I spent the next five years of my life in university.
Like Malcolm X said, prison is far better than university trust, but
In prison, that kind of changed a lot of the way I look at the world.
If you know my story about how I came to slam, I told you about the car wreck that I needed last my life, right.
I also nearly lost my life in prison.
But it was due to the hands of another Muslim.
At one point,
the imam who was with us for so long who actually had gotten a
bachelor's degree through correspondence. Through Islamic online university, Bilal Philips just kind of started all that. He, when he left, when he left when he got out, he had been down for like 3540 years and he was my roommate. When he left, they had to choose a new Imam. They had to choose a new Imam, because in the prison system in America, there are especially and I was in a maximum security prison because my sentence was assault and battery have a high and aggravated nature. Like that's one step down from attempted murder. You know that that's it. It was supposed to be attempted murder, but I actually pleaded down to assault and battery behind aggravated nature.
There are two types of people who run major security prisons in America. You have the Nation of Islam, I mean, not the Nation of Islam, the white supremacists, the Nazis, the Neo Nazis, and you have the Muslims. That's it. The Muslims and the Nazis are the two people who make things happen on prison. These are the two most feared group of individuals. Why? Because they stick together, they stick together. That's one thing I learned in the prison system was brotherhood of Muslims of the Muslim community, we watched each other's back, we looked out for each other. If you messed with one of us, you messed with all of us. That's just the way it went. And even though these are two very
different ideologies, the Aryan Nation as well as the Muslims, they mutually respected one another as groups that you know, like we, if we get into it, it's going to be a riot, you know, I mean, we're going to tear this whole prison apart because it's just going to be a couple 100 people against a couple 100 people.
But after an imam left, the brothers got together and had Shura to decide who would be the next few men. And the prison I was at. The rule was, whoever knows the most Quran, that should be the Imam. That's just the way they viewed it. Whoever knew the most Quran should be the Imam. Now there was an old man, there was an old man named Muhammad Elfi who knew the entire Quran he was the Hafiz Masha Allah, he had a life sentence. He wasn't going nowhere. But he did not want to be the man. He did not you know, he was old. He was like, I don't have time for this nonsense. He didn't want to be part of it. So he said no. So it went to whoever knew the Quran most Quran next. So we had to sit in
halacha and tell how many people you know, like how much of the Quran Do you know.
And it comes to fall, that I was the person who knew the most current at the time. So I became the first white Imam, the first white imam of the South Carolina Department of Corrections, it had never happened before. Never.
And that was both a good and bad thing, good and bad thing because within the Muslim community, there was also there was no separate, like community for like the Nation of Islam types. The Nation of Islam is not part of the Muslim community brothers, that you know, right now, they don't believe like we believe they believe that Allah Subhana Allah, stuff for Allah came in the name in the image or in the form of a man named Muhammad, who gave the message of Islam to Elijah Muhammad. So when they say Muhammad is the last messenger, that's what they mean. They mean, Elijah Muhammad, not Muhammad, bin Abdullah, somebody was telling them, but there was some of these factions within the
Muslim community. Those people also believed that white people are the devil that we are from Chevron. And we were created in a lab, from pigs and devils, right. So there was a small portion of the community that was not very happy with me being the winner. And I accepted it, because I was ignorant. Basically, I accepted it because I was ignorant. That's why when people call me like, Oh, would you would you even consider being an imam? No, I did that once. And not doing it again. So one Friday, after Juma I gave a football on racism, because there was some you know, it was coming back to me that these brothers were like, you know, he shouldn't be the man, isn't it? So I gave a
cookbook on racism. And how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam stood up against was the first person in recorded history to have stood up against racism, and said that a black person is not better than a white person. A white person is not better than a black person. An auditor is not better than a non audit, etc. The best of you are those who have the most Taqwa. And Allah subhanho wa Taala says, we created you and nations and tribes and races and colors and languages so that you can know one another. Not that you can despise one another. Could you imagine if we were all created exactly the same? And we looked exactly the same. What kind of what kind of uniqueness? What kind of
uniqueness would be about us, we would all just be like, I'm the same. You're the same, like there's nothing to us. We're very bland. We'd be a very bland species. Like do you can tell one from another. I don't know if it's male or female that's about it. Got to be careful saying that these these two
Anyway, after Juma that evening, we were going to dinner in the chow hall. And I always walked around with the amount of security that we had, there was a in the prison system, there was the Imam. There was an Emir who was security who also had four or five, what we called Sharif's under him who were basically the police. There was an immune of Education who took care of making sure the community was educated there was there was we had it down to a system right? System. And wherever the man went, the Emir of security when like, that was his job, he went where I went, and the brother who was the Emir at the time for me, but he was like six foot three, and about three, he
looked like, like a linebacker in the NFL brother was not not a joke, not a joke.
Just so happen. As we were in chow hall, he got called by somebody else it was it was a very deep plot, he got called away by somebody else said, all you know, this brother needs your help, whatever. And as I was in the mind,
the brother who would do this to me, basically call me the C word, which is like the reverse of the N word. I'm gonna say that because I can want you to put this on YouTube. And as I turned, I saw him coming to stab me. And he was trying to go right here, like he was trying to get me dead in the heart. But I luckily turned quick enough to where I turned and he caught me right here. To this day, he caught me with about this long shank, pierced my lung, popped my lung and was about three inches away from the heart that tried to take my life, because they have a big huge scar right here. And sometimes my cardio isn't what at all, it shouldn't be all the time because I got a puncture, they
went all the way through my lung, one side to the other, and the reinflated in hospital. So this brother tried to take my life trying to kill me, own Muslim brother, well, you know, call that what you will.
After that, they, after I got out of the hospital, they shipped me off to another prison because they were like, No, you can't be here, you cause you cause way too much way too much drama. And needless to say, after that I every I went to two more prisons after that, simply because they kept moving me the closer I was getting to my release data. And then finally I went to actually, they moved me to a work release prison where you can go out and work during the daytime. That's where I was when 911 happened. And I was the only Muslim there. I was the only Muslim they had no Juma? No nothing. And then after 911 happened when I started, see how people started looking at me, I was
like, bro, send me back into prison prison. I mean, I'm not saying you can't even see me on the streets no more. Because I remember coming. I remember hearing about it on the radio. When we were out. We were out digging a ditch. And I was like, why is just happening? Then I went I went back. It was like maybe four hours after it happened. We went back and looked at the TV all they were showing with the towers coming down and you know, whose face? And I was like, Oh, my goodness, you guys gotta get me out of here, because I'm not going to make it. So am I going to try to do me, I'm going to do them. So I served my time got out, serve my two years on probation. my probation officer
actually hated Muslims, and tried to send me back again. But come to the law. It didn't happen. The judge actually looked at it and saw that it was some bias there. And I served my two years of probation. And I have never been in trouble with the law since well, I have been but not for anything that I've done. You know, I mean, you know, being a Muslim these days, that's, that's a crime in a lot of places. But
what I'm trying to tell you brothers is that Allah's plan is immaculate. And Allah never gives us anything more than we are able to handle when a loss and I have a lot of people come to me in my counseling and telling me that they're in that like, they've had enough in life, you know, like they're at the end of their rope, they, they say, and they even start questioning you does not Allah say that he will not give us anything more than we can bear. And you say yes, he said, Well, I can't bear this. And I tried to explain to them and I'm explaining to you that your decision. And that's based on your own perception of your situation. If Allah has given you a test, it is because he
SubhanaHu wata, Allah knows you are capable of it. He knows you're capable of it. The decision of not whether you decide to stand up to that is up to you. That is a subjective framework that you have put around your problems. When you suffer SLM isn't that well, he's in a dark, well, like, why am I even gonna get out of this? But his perception is that Allah Subhana Allah will, will provide Allah will give me away, he gets out, you know, you think and like when he sees that bucket drop down, you might even think he's like, Oh, I'm saved, you know? hamdulillah I'm saved. Where does he save to slavery? Save to slavery, right?
Does he give up? No, he doesn't give up is subjective to him. That whatever Allah puts in front of you, is for your good, it's for your good. Your job is to find a way through it. Find a way to keep moving forward and having faith in Allah subhanho wa Taala Anna, nowhere in the Quran.
And nowhere nowhere will you find in the Quran where Allah subhanho wa Taala says, to understand him, that in order to believe in Him you need to understand him he says to believe in me and then to work with Allah Allah have reliant trust upon me have rely on trust upon me to walk cool is trusting in that which you can't even really comprehend. You don't really understand it. So use case say that of the will thinking that maybe I'm safe though he's into slavery now. out of slavery he ends up in a very prominent position in the house of Aziz Masha Allah know from he ends up in prison Subhan Allah in prison, he's thinking I said, I'm done. Then Allah gives him the ability to interpret these
dreams which become a catalyst for him to become very prominent in the in the household of the king of Egypt, which eventually allows him to restore himself to his family, etc. But look at the roundabout way that Allah subhanho wa Taala sent him. We us as human beings, what do we want? We live in a world now where we want everything as instant gratification, right? I upload a video 10 minutes later, I want a million views or I'm gonna be like this was trash, right? We're always worried about instant gratification. I hit a button where like we become like primates in our dopamine receptors, we won't we want to hit a button and we want to reward That's it. That's all we
want. But this is not the system of Allah subhanho wa Taala for those who believe this is not the system of Allah.
Sometimes what you want right you asked for something and ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada in his infinite mercy, and his infinite wisdom decides to grant you this. Anybody grants it to you at the end of a path and that path might be up and down left and right thorny branches muck Meyer hardships, difficulties, and then you start crying. Why am I going to this difficulty and Allah subhanho wa taala. Is, is is is looking at you as if you ask for something amazing.
You want is something grand? You think it's just like that's it. We have to get over this instant gratification. Nothing in life that is worth having. My grandfather taught me this is a young man and will Allah He the more I've learned the deen of Islam the more I realize this is true. Nothing that is worth having in your life when you obtain it easily. If is obtained easily, it is usually not worth it. It is using that instant gratification is very short lived. It is a quick hit to the dopamine in that's it, you're on chasing the next high. But those things which Allah subhanaw taala has turned for us as good. They come through difficulty. They come through hardship. They come
through trials, you can go through the story of every one of the undead of Allah subhanho wa Taala from Adam and his test in the garden from Ebro. He his test with his own father, his test with his own people being thrown into the fire. You can go to Na Na Sam, loot na Sudan. You can go to the Waterlase Sudan. You can go to Asa you could just go on and on and on. And our beloved Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, the greatest of men, but they were put through the greatest of trials, the greatest of tests, the greatest of difficulties, but the end of the road is the highest ranks of agenda to for those places that will never be able to inhabit was at the end of their road.
We want the quick and easy way guess what the quick and easy way is the quick and easy way as Jahannam if you want an easy life, chasing after everything that you desire, and just giving in to every one of your wishes and dreams, the end of that road is Jahannam the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that when Allah created hell in heaven,
he sent Gibreel an ECM to go look at what I created. Tell me what do you think? Right? Go look at it and tell me what you think. Jabril went and looked at your hand and he came back and he said,
would you create some he said, if you tell anybody that this place exists, no one's ever gonna go there, did you? You see what that is. Nobody's going there. If you tell him it exists. And then he went to Jana. And he came back and he said, My Lord, if you tell people of this place, everybody's going to enter it. Who's not going to want to go here. Then Allah subhana, WA Tirana took Jahannam and surrounded it with temptations and desires and trials are all of the things that we like the easy, quick hustle of life, you know, all of the things that our our soul desires, he surrounded Jahannam with that, and then he surrounds the Jannah with what difficulties trials, temptations,
oppression, subjugation, hardship, poverty, famine, people turning against you turning on you.
All of these things that are sold tries to stay away from he surrounded gender with that. And he told you real s&m Go look at it again. When Jabril la CERAM went to look at Jana again. He came back he said My Lord, he know what he making it. Nobody's gonna get through that. Nobody's going, it's gonna be empty. Then he went and looked at Jahannam and came back and he's
said My Lord, they all gonna go. That's where they're all going. I know, man, I know, I know what you created, that's where they're all going. So we want as Muslims, we want Jenna, but we want to get it through the path of Jahannam it's such an oxymoron, we want to get everything that we want in this life. And then we want to die and easy death, you know, go, go to sleep one night and just not wake up waking our grave, and our graves, like a big palace, you know, with with all the beautiful furnishings, and then want to go in front of Allah on the day of judgment, and him just to shuffle us along, you know, like, we're going into a football match today, just keep going, mate, you know,
and they want to go to agenda and just have it all. That's, that's what we want. That's not how it works. Unfortunately, that's not how it works. If you want good.
A lot of times Allah is going to give it to you through difficult means to difficulty, you're gonna have to prove your worth, you have to prove your worth.
So when you ask ALLAH SubhanA, Allah for goodness, and you ask Allah for these big blessings in your life, when you ask Allah to grant you patience, get ready to be tested. Because Allah you don't get patients, you don't get patients through ease. You get patients through tests, when they've held me, you know, a couple of times, I've entered a lot of countries, I'm not going to go too deep into that, you know, but I've been pulled into our special, you know, side rooms from for Muslims. And, you know, they kept me for five, six hours on time and behind, they kept me for like, 12 hours, you know, and they kept coming to check on me to see how I was doing right. Like, you know, like, you're
already in there. And I'm thinking to myself, to about I spent four years and eight months in a sale, that was his biggest one of that single bathroom upstairs, right, this is one of the single stall for years and eight months like that, you're gonna beat me with this, it's got a couch in here, there's a problem, I'm good, I'm good. I'll see you can come back like six months, I'll still be
been done this, you got to find somebody, you're gonna break me.
But when I look back on my life, and what I do now, and you know, subhanAllah, the older you get for for those of us in here above the age of 40, you get this the older you get in life, the more you start seeing things in clearer vision, you know, this, these, these things right here become worse. Right? Right. But it's our elders, these things that Allah put in our head, they become weaker. But the overall vision of how we see life starts to become more in focus starts to become more in focus. And we start seeing things as they really are things that are what is really valuable, what is really worthwhile, what is really
something that has meaning to you. And what has meaning to me, is what's going to be here for me, when you put me in the ground. That's it Wallahi that's the only thing that matters. That's all that matters. That's it. Because I'm telling you, brothers and sisters who might be watching, most of us, most of us are not going to be able to do enough good in the life in this life to overcome our sins. Most of us, most of us are not I know me, I know myself. And this is one thing that happens as you get older. The older you get, the more you know yourself. Right? When you're young you you think the most amazing things about yourself. Right? When I was 2025 years old was that was untouchable? You
know, I mean, I had three black belts. By the time I was 25, you thought you couldn't tell me nothing, nothing.
Now the older I get, the more I realize who I really am. The more I realize who I really am, the more my own sin start to haunt me my own shortcomings start to bother me, even sitting here telling other people what to do and what Allah says bothers me because I know me. I know me and I know if I go to Allah subhanho wa Taala with only what I've done in this life, I'm in trouble. I'm in trouble.
So I start to work on things that are going to still be here helping me when I'm gone. This is why I've continued to do Dawa for the past 17 years even though it's not an easy life isn't a difficult life. Anybody who thinks that being involved in Dawa is something that's glamorous or easy or you haven't done it, you haven't done it or you haven't done it long enough.
This is why I involve myself in charity, helping other people and helping projects that I know will still be standing in sha Allah Allah once I'm turning to Dust in the Grave because that is the only way I think I'm going to make it is if enough deeds are collected for me after I'm gone open to the time Allah subhanho wa Taala decides to put in into this world then I might have a chance I might have a chance That's what matters. Nothing else matters. enjoy as much of this life as you want. It's okay. As long as it is halal brothers and sisters, you can have whatever you want from this life. You can build yourself golden palaces in this world if you like if it's permissible and you've
earned it halal, enjoy it Hara Bismillah but know that you're not taking a damn bit of it with you. None of its going with you. There are two there are two things that go into your grave you in your deeds. That's it. That's it and you can amass the whole
All entire world if you want it, the moment you die, it goes back to Allah Subhana Allah to honor
the wealth that Allah created when he created this world. Yeah, it has never changed. It has changed the way we look at it the way we view it, the money, paper, but real wealth will receive real wealth, which is based on gold and silver and jewels. And you know, all of these things, tangible commodities, the same ones are going to be here.
When we die, that we're here when Allah subhanaw taala created this world,
not taking none of it with you. And on that day, all of these kings and great men who thought they had everything the whole world was under their feet. What is the Lord gonna say he's gonna roll up the world like, he's gonna roll up the whole heavens and earth like a piece of paper like this.
And say, Where are the kings of the world now? Where's your kingdom? Where is that you fought about? Where is that you disbelieved in me over where's that you told on your brother about where is that you betrayed one another over? Where is it now? What does it matter?
One of my earliest teachers,
Rahim Allah Tirana, Allah have mercy on his soul, who encouraged me about the our
dear beloved brother from Pakistan.
His name was Muhammad Zeki within Shafi I used to not say his name for a long time because he's wiped off the internet for a reason. If you go look for his name on the internet, now you will find barely a trace he was scrubbed for a reason. But anyway, he used to tell me you shall.
Nothing in this world matters. If it's not going to help you when you meet Allah.
enjoy as much of the world as you like it's okay. It's alright to enjoy it. But don't count that as value.
The only things that are valuable to you in this world are the things that are going to be helpful to you. When you have the final meeting with Allah.
I said this on my Instagram story the other night, because as we're moving in this life, we're racing forward we're going Sadie oh, we're just racing along. You know, we have one thing to do after another you have this goal set that goal said if you are a high value man, which you should be, and for a youth you should be a high value man, a high value man knows his goals. He knows his dreams, his aspirations, he's got a two year plan, a five year plan a 10 year plan. He knows he might not ever meet it, but it's there anyway, the plan is there.
You can have all these plans and achieving all these dreams going to one business meeting to another to another to another. But you always have to remember, the final meeting is with Allah. The final meeting is with Allah subhanho wa Taala Anna, no matter what you do, no matter where you go, no matter how hard you hide, we know the story of the man who died in he told his children to burn me and take my ashes and scattered them on the land and on the sea. Why because he even uneven in his state. He knew that the final meetings with with Allah. And the Prophet saw a sudden told us that when he's resurrected, because Allah can put you together even if you turn yourself to nothing.
He's gonna add he asked him, Why did you do that? And he's, you know, good. Well, I did it. I wanted to try to avoid this meeting. This is the inevitable. It is the inevitable. Everything in this life is. As I've said at the beginning, it's subjective. Its objective, even realism today is subjective. The only thing I know for sure is the deen of Islam is true. The Quran is true. And the son of the Prophet alayhi salatu salam is true. Everything else, I look at it with a grain of salt and take it with, with, with with with a little bit of of skepticism, everything.
But one thing I know for a fact, without a shadow of a doubt, I don't know what else I will do in my life. I might not make it home to my flat tonight to sleep. But that meeting with ALLAH SubhanA wa, Allah is Allah. It's the truth. And that's the only meeting that's going to matter.
That's the only meeting that's going to matter. That meeting will determine the rest of your eternity. So no matter what else you're doing in your life, brothers and sisters, make sure that you are preparing yourself for that meeting. Everything else in your life, keep chasing after it. I'm not telling you to give up on your dreams. I'm not telling you to give up on trying to become successful or trying to become wealthy. All of that is good. Go after it. You cannot help people from a position of weakness. This is something I've been trying to explain for 10 years now, you cannot help the rest of the world from a position of weakness. This UNMISS should be in a position
of strength, that is how we will be able to help others. But while you're doing all of that, always have that in the back of what should be in the front of your mind. But somewhere, it is pegged in your reality that my final meeting is with Allah and that I must be getting ready for I must be getting ready for that meeting because it is inevitable. This is how the NBA like Yusuf alayhi salam were able to go through all of the difficulties in life that they went through that the test of being thrown in the world betrayed by his own brothers. And one of the other wisdoms, we find is that when he was given power over his brothers, how did he treat them? He treated them with
kindness. He treated with him
gentleness, he treated them with mercy. The same way our Prophet alayhi salatu salam upon Mecca set for a select group of people everybody else, let it be. This is power. This is real strength. This is somebody who sees the bigger picture in life, not somebody who's in it just for the for tat, tit for tat.
Yusuf was a willing to forgive his own brothers who literally betrayed him to try to kill him. We want Him to forgive our own brother, or sister or uncle, or father or mother or whatever, over the smallest of slights,
the smallest of slights, we will disconnect, and this unite family for the entirety of our lives. And then we wonder why we're in such a weird position that we're in in the world today, that there's so many of us, but we are least respected than we've ever been, since the time of the death of the Prophet alayhi. Salatu was Salam, I would say we're in some of the weakest positions we've ever been.
And the Prophet sallallahu Sallam foretold this, he said this, he said this, he said, There will come a time where wolves will gather around you, and invite themselves to feast on you. Like you would invite someone to come to a banquet. And you'll be, you'll be like the form of the sea, like the form of the sea. And there'll be wine and be placed in your hearts. And they asked the Prophet alayhi salatu. Salam will it be because we are small in number like, because it's not a whole lot of us? Because to them, they're thinking, bro, if there was enough of us, take over the world, you know, 313 and bother. Like they like we don't need numbers. He said, No, because even you'll be a
lot. There'll be a lot of you. But you'll be like the phone with the sea.
And what Han will be placed in your horse and he said, What is one, he said Humber dunya, Akira automount, you'll love this world so much that you will be you'll hate to die. None of us wants to die. None of us wants to die. We know that's not what we want when I'm projecting. But the fact is, if Allah subhanho wa Taala decided today is my day. Let's go. That's it, we let's go. But until then, until then, I'm going to continue to try to do the best with what Allah Subhana Allah has given me, because he's put me through one thing after another after another after another.
If you haven't seen my YouTube series, the domestic violence tapes, just go watch it. I was tortured by my stepmom. My mother abandoned me when I was three years old, just left me at my grandparents house and I didn't see her again until I was six. My father would remarry. My stepmother who was my mother's sworn enemy in high school.
And she went on subsequently torture me. For the next 10 years of my life and aged five to the age of 15. I spent the most of that time locked in my bedroom being tortured by her while my dad worked two jobs to provide and he did not know really know what's going on. And he didn't believe it. There's a long story behind that with children who are abused and why they don't speak up and why they're not believed, etc. But I went on from that to then, four years later, being incarcerated for five years of my life. And then when I got out of prison, one thing I told Motorola here, because I saw moto soubry, about a week before I got out. And you know, for those for those five years I spent
in prison, there was a lot of brothers who came and went and came in when if you know what I mean? The recidivism rate is very high. Like there would be brothers who were, you know, like, mashallah, on the deed. They get out of prison. And two months later, you Siemens, Charlize, and I were like, Oh, are you doing human or, you know, men dunya got me again.
I saw that happen too many times too many times. There are some people who go to prison, become a Muslim, in prison. And then when they get out, they leave it right there at the prison gate until they come back again. Why? Because in prison, Muslims are protected. They're a protected class. You know, I mean, like some other classes today, we can't mention that, again, I'll put the video on YouTube. But there are certain classes that you just don't mess with. And Muslims is one of them in prison, and will tell you to came in he's like, brother Lucia. Because they first they called me up the ramen. You know, I mean, because I talked about how Allah was merciful to me when I became a
Muslim, before becoming to prison. And there was very few people that they admit there was very few people you meet in prison that were Muslim before they went there. Except for now, there's a lot of political prisoners. But anyway. But when I found out that when I read the puzzle cell anemia, and I found out that the person who my mother named me after Joshua, she named me after Joshua in the Bible, there's a whole book called Joshua. And she said, I named you after that prophet.
When I found out that there was a prophet named Joshua in the in Islam, and he's mentioned in the Quran that by name, but his name was usara. So my name is Lucia. Let's say that's it. That's my mother gave me that name. And I'm sticking with that name. But he told me St. Lucia, I don't want you to become another one. Those people we see back in six months. And I told him I said, this is a one and done for me. Allah has given me a chance. Allah has placed me here for five years so that my Deen can become sound, and I can learn. I probably learned more about the dean in those five years than then then I've learned in the subsequent 18 years after and I've traveled all over the globe
because you have nothing but time
Believe it or not about time, that's what a beautiful thing about prison now nobody got time right I had another good time.
I said brother matar here, I give you my word and I'm gonna go out there and I'm gonna make something of myself and I'm gonna do something for this Dean. I'm gonna do something for the deen of Islam because Allah has given me so much. And to this day, me and him still conversate on a weekly basis. I used to travel around with him all over the United States. His health is quite bad. Now he's had surgery on both of his knees. May Allah subhanaw taala give him shifa and sha Allah, but he's always called me he's like, you know, I give you respect, because not only did you do what you said, you're going to do, but you did it on the most grand scale that I've seen happen. And you did
it all without, you know, using your prison story and all of this, like I didn't want my, my journey my life to be the reason why you listen to me. I didn't want my life and it to be a prop that made people I want it to be about the dean. I want it to be about Allah subhana wa Allah and His messenger. And it was not until 2020 that I put out the prison tapes and the domestic violence tapes to let everybody know that yeah, you bro you should have been to prison. I was abused as a child, etc. So on and so forth. That's why things mean so much to me. That's why my the youth means so much to me. That's why mental health means so much to me. That's why kids means so much to me. Because
I've seen what happens when it all goes wrong. In our youth. Why you don't those streets are not for you. Prison is not for you. It's not the place. Yes, I learned so much about my Deen there but don't don't do that. Don't say oh bro, you just said we can learn about the deen and prisoners go rob didn't come. Don't do that. Don't do that. You have plenty of opportunities. This was 1998 We didn't have the internet like you have not like it was it was a different time. Now you have plenty of opportunities to learn about the deen in Greenville, South Carolina, I didn't have a whole lot of opportunities. But Allah subhana wa Ana decided to put me in a place where I would have no choice to
bring a place where I would have no ability, but to seek him out and to seek my religion and seek my deen and seek knowledge. So the lesson from Surah Yusuf is two things for me. Number one, never give up. Never give up. It's not over till it's over. It's not over till it's over.
That is one thing I'll tell you. And I can say that with some with some
little bit of power behind my chest because I've lived a life proving that it's not over till it's over. A young man who was being abused by a stepmother being told he was never going to be anything being told he was trashed day in, day out. Having this drilled into his brain every single day, failing in school, getting into trouble being very angry. Normally, you know what that path ends up. That's the path that people you see they become psychopaths. This is how they're lifestar people will become mass murderers or serial killers or do crazy things. But Allah subhanho wa Taala his infinite wisdom and mercy for some reason, I don't know, I don't know chose for me to have a
different path. So it's not over till it's over. Do not ever give up. As long as you do not give up you will win in sha Allah to Allah because Allah says part of the helmet minimum, that the end of the road of the believer is success. So never give up. And number two, number two, your life is as you perceive it to be your life, your situation, your condition, your struggles. Everything that you go through is as you perceive it, you can perceive it to be horrible, or you can perceive it to be something that is part of Allah's mercy and a part of his plan. Because the Prophet alayhi salatu salam said, Allah is as you perceive him to be, Allah is as you perceive him to be. That means that
the way we view Allah subhanho wa Taala His mercy is His wrath, all of that the way we balanced that is the way Allah subhana wa Taala is going to
seem to us and that's the way we're going to find him. And that's the way we're going to live our life. So it's not over till it's over, never give up. Never give up and your life is what you make it and as a believer, it should always be good. It should always be a station of goodness. Shama Jota Anna BarakAllahu li comm Jimmy and was Salam Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh