Divorce A Last Resort & Proper Procedues to get a Divorce

Yasir Qadhi

Date:

Channel: Yasir Qadhi

File Size: 43.87MB

Share Page

Related

AI: Summary © The transcript is a jumbled mix of disconnected and disjointed statements and phrases, making it difficult to summarize as it appears to be a jumbled mix of unrelated and disjointed statements. The conversation covers topics like divorce, the importance of maintaining marriage properly, and the importance of following protocol. The transcript also includes references to Islam and sh lit Shlyc, as well as a discussion of the Shattan of Allah.
Transcript ©
00:00:00--> 00:00:10

In the board as as nominees, one of the things that all of you requested one of the things which were on top of the list was endowment, how can epic become self sufficient? How do we become self reliant?

00:00:11--> 00:00:52

We have announced many times that overall our expenses in a year or more than $2 million, that is our expenses $2.2 million per year. So alhamdulillah for almost 18 months, the board has been working very diligently with many community members that have come to love we have reached another milestone and inshallah we will provide you details on on Sunday, but Alhamdulillah Inshallah, with this investment that we are going to make, we are going to generate a significant amount of income inshallah for Epic and this is going to help us a lot as we look at the self reliance, so inshallah inshallah you know, we will provide those details on the Sunday we will have a PowerPoint, we will

00:00:52--> 00:01:24

give you details because this has been a lot of work that has gone into it, so, it's important that we let you know, all the details, what is the ROI, what is the investment all of their stuff Inshallah, so just in sha Allah Wait, and come on Sunday inshallah and so this way we can let you know what's going on. So with that, I think that's pretty much Oh, yeah, one more thing. We have as you you may know, that from a youth perspective, we have a science lab that happens every Saturday, there are close to 20 students who are participating and believe it or not, this is Subhanallah they are learning so much if you're here on Saturday, you can see they're playing with machines and all

00:01:24--> 00:01:32

of this stuff and now they're going to inshallah go into these competitions. So please make dua for them and then shall we will have more details in coming weeks

00:01:39--> 00:01:47

Oh, yes, it's Sunday. I'm pretty sure yeah. So exactly. So Sunday after Isha, we are going to go over the endowment and what we have Inshallah, so Salam, aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato.

00:02:24--> 00:02:27

Salam Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

00:02:37--> 00:02:41

Allahu Ecobuild Oh like bow

00:02:44--> 00:02:45

oh

00:02:48--> 00:02:58

oh

00:03:01--> 00:03:02

should you

00:03:05--> 00:03:10

know all

00:03:14--> 00:03:14

I should know

00:03:25--> 00:03:31

all

00:03:34--> 00:03:38

tried to earn more high murder was

00:03:46--> 00:03:47

shot to earn

00:03:48--> 00:03:49

more home

00:03:53--> 00:03:55

on

00:04:10--> 00:04:11

hi

00:04:47--> 00:04:48

Hi y'all

00:05:00--> 00:05:00

Hi.

00:05:37--> 00:05:40

All like well

00:06:03--> 00:06:50

Alhamdulillah bless it be He who created life and death and in whose hands is the Dominion. He alternated the cycle of the sun and moon and blessed us with different seasons. He created us male and female and through marriage legislated their union, and he blessed us with children and family as a source of love and object of affection. So Praise be to Him who sent down the Quran as a guide and illumination. And may Salah 10 Salam be upon the one who shall be resurrected on the praiseworthy station as to what follows ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada reminds us to be conscious of him and when he says in the Quran Yeah, you hola Dena, Armando taco la haka to otter, wala, temotu Tuna,

00:06:50--> 00:06:51

Illa, anti Muslim when

00:06:52--> 00:07:45

they are Muslims. One of the topics that is rarely discussed, some might even think to be taboo, is the topic of divorce. We have spoken about marriage and the blessings of marriage and the techniques to preserve marriage. But it is also important, even if people do not like to talk about it, that we discussed the reality of divorce because us not talking about it does not change the reality on the ground. Divorce rates in our community, and in the broader society around us are skyrocketing, reaching unprecedented highs. And the fact of the matter is that many many Muslims end up doing divorce in an improper and hasty manner and then they ended up regretting it. So it is best to have

00:07:45--> 00:08:35

a frank discussion and a hotbar or two or maybe more than this, to remind the Muslims of the reality and of the rules and of the etiquettes and of the warnings in the Quran and Sunnah about this aspect of divorce. It is undeniable, dear Muslims that our religion has legislated divorce in times of need for a necessity. However, the default ruling is that divorce is not resorted to it is and the very least mcru the very least it is discouraged. And in a hadith which scholars have disputed is is it authentic or not? Some have said authentic, some have said so how have you said this? In any case, we find it in our books. in Allahabad hallelujah in de la autolock. The most despised of all things

00:08:35--> 00:08:53

that are permissible is divorce, the most despised. Some say this is a Hadith some say so Hobbes said it either way, it's in our tradition. It's allowed, but it's despised. It's an exit that you only resort to when there's no other way out. And

00:08:54--> 00:09:42

the reality that every Imam and chef and community leader will tell you is that so many families have been destroyed. And how many children have been deprived of a loving parents and families simply because of the hastiness and the anger and the arrogance of one of the parents generally speaking the Father and that is because it is also undeniable that in our Shetty, the husband has the right of divorce, it is in his hands. And there is no question this is the default ruling. But just because he has that right. It doesn't mean he must invoke it at every time. With right comes responsibility with privilege comes a sense of responsibility. And the fact of the matter is that so

00:09:42--> 00:09:59

many of our men have not displayed the responsibility that is befitting of this institution. You know if you read the verses about divorce Surah Al Baqarah Surah Tala, if you read the verses, verses about divorce, you will find so many times the phrase teleca hoodoo doula.

00:10:00--> 00:10:45

The follow up these are the lines of Allah do not transgress them when they yet I do the life of government officer whoever goes beyond the lines of Allah has wronged himself seven times in the Quran about divorce. Allah tells the husband's fear Allah fear Allah fear Allah. Why? Because Allah azza wa jal is telling the husbands they are responsible. Yes, they have the privilege. Yes, they have that right. But with that privilege comes the maturity, the wisdom, the responsibility, in fact in the Hadith and Sunnah dibny Marja, listen to this hadith dear Muslims, our Prophet sallallahu are they he was setting them became irritated at how some men acted irresponsibly. The hadith is an

00:10:45--> 00:11:29

empty manager. He said, What is the matter with some people? My Babu acquirement listen to this yell Abu Dhabi who do the law, they are making games out of the religion of Allah, they're playing with the *tier yellow baboon the Arabic word used is to play playing with the Shetty out with the odor of Allah. They say I divorced. I take you back I divorced I take you back. Our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam called this playing games with the *tier. Brothers husbands men pay attention. Yes, we have the right of Talaq, but to invoke it, to use it as a sword over the marriage to always make a mockery of it. The Quran and the Sunnah, says this is transgressing the rights of Allah

00:11:29--> 00:12:13

Subhana Allah to Allah. Divorce should only be done with thoughts with process, it should never be done spontaneously. It should never be done in an argument. It should never be done in a state of anger. In fact, we learn and all of us know this hadith we learn. Hadith isn't Behati that our Prophet saw some said every day IBLEES sets his throne somewhere on the waters and he sets forth his minions, he sets forth Shayateen to do their evil bidding. And when they come back, and they say I've done this, I've done that he doesn't pay attention to them, until finally one of them comes back. And he said, I continued bothering one couple until they ended up in divorce. IBLEES stands up

00:12:13--> 00:12:59

and hugs him and says this is the one that has done something this hadith is in Behati dear Muslims Shavon once your marriage to break up Shavon is actively engaged and making a small thing much bigger, one common to be at the end of the world. This is shape on the anger that you feel towards the spouse, the father or the mother of your children. The extreme hatred that might come despite the years of love. Realize this is the catalyst shaytans waiting for and as soon as shaytaan finds it, he will jump on it pounce on it and make it much bigger. The hadith says that the police is talking to this entity this Jin the shaytaan is saying I continued harassing Mizzou I continued,

00:12:59--> 00:13:43

it's not a one off. It's the lifelong goal of iblees he wants to see our marriages break apart because he knows when a marriage breaks apart, the children suffer the children suffer, society suffers, he knows this. So what does he want to do? Continuously Shayateen come and they try to cause a small situation to be much worse. And therefore if shaitan wants your marriage to break, the Shetty wants your marriage to succeed. Remember this point che thorns is the one that is happy when a marriage breaks up. The Shetty has laws and institutions to try one's best to maintain that marriage and our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said Hadith isn't Oh Buddha would that whoever

00:13:43--> 00:14:23

spoils the mind of a lady until she divorced his her husband, that man has nothing to do with us. He decides to disassociated himself from such a person. That Hadith primarily applies directly to biller May Allah protect us to an evil man who is seducing a married lady to marry divorce your husband and marry you. Our Prophet system said anyone who does this he has nothing to do with us lace Amina he rejected or negated that person being a part of the God fearing Ummah, anybody who strives to break a marriage and that is why when Allah mentions Blackmagic, when Allah mentioned Shayateen, when Allah mentioned said, What is the one example that Allah gives in the Quran, you

00:14:23--> 00:14:59

further you're gonna be here by now, Marie was Og, the number one goal of the magician is to break the bonds between the husband and the wife SubhanAllah. All of the shayateen are working to break our marriage and Allah is telling us beware, Allah is telling us be careful of them, protect your marriage and do not resort to the end which is divorce unless you have no other option. Now in the previous clip, as I mentioned a little bit about advice about keeping the marriage together. Today I'm going to talk a little bit about the exit because we need to know the exit. Just like when we boarded the plane, the safety features are given and the exit service

00:15:00--> 00:15:39

head and we ask Allah refuge, we don't want to go there. But if we need to, then it is best to follow the exit protocol properly, we need to know the protocol if and when the emergency happens. And that is why I will go over very briefly the necessary protocols, or else when we need to do it, who is going to teach you unfortunately, all too often, nobody cares to ask about the procedures of divorce. And I say this bluntly and clearly, in planning a divorce. One should even require more planning than in planning the marriage and thinking about divorce, you should think twice about divorce more than you thought about whether you should get married or not to this individual.

00:15:39--> 00:16:20

Unfortunately, people are hasty and they don't think properly and they do not follow the Sharia. What is the methodology of the Sharia? What is the guideline of the Sharia very briefly, first point which is in the Quran, the first point dialogue between the couples directly if there's something really bothering you, about your spouse, about your partner, don't keep it bottled up, try to have a direct dialogue. And we spoke a little bit about this in the last clip. But point number two if that's not working, then get the help and the advice and Mushara have family and friends go to those whom you know, your cousin's your brothers and sisters, your uncles and aunts, your family, friends,

00:16:20--> 00:17:00

go to them and explain the situation. If your knee is to solve the problem. It is not backbiting to talk about what's happening in the household. And if you're Nia is to gossip, Allah knows the difference. If you're Nia is to solve the problem. There is no backbiting and if your knee is to gossip and to say bad things, Allah knows your Nia and in the incident of the if the famous story, our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he asked the advice of two people that he trusted about what should he do in the marital situation? He asked the advice of Zaid, even Hadith and he asked the advice of Ali ignitability. This is Nabil Laura seul. Allah salAllahu Alaihe Salam, he's calling

00:17:00--> 00:17:38

Zaid, and then he's calling Ali. And he says, What do you think I should do about this matter? It's a personal family matter. And he's asking the people whom he trusts if this is Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, where are you? Where am I? There is nothing wrong, your manliness is not hurt. When you ask for help from other people, ask advice of your family and friends. Do you really think the situation is that bad? Is it salvageable? What advice do you give me that stage number two, stage number three, if it gets beyond this, the Quran is very clear as well for battle hakam and Allahi. Wa Hakim in Alia, the two the two of them should decide on an arbitration Council, each one

00:17:38--> 00:18:16

chooses one person, this is not a chef, this is not an Adam, this is not this is a family friend, a wise relative. This is somebody who knows you, the wife will choose one, the husband will choose one for both who had come in early he will come in earlier, anybody whom you trust and has wisdom doesn't have to know advanced laws of Sharia, because human life and the touch river of marriage doesn't require books of flick, it requires years and it requires white hair. And it requires living through life. You choose a person of wisdom and intelligence, and the husband and the wife choose each one that they think will be more sympathetic to their cause. And then these two, these two

00:18:17--> 00:18:51

adjudicators, these two people sit together, firstly, with only the wife, then with only the husband, and then they come together as a family. And as many times as they would like to sit there should be allowed to sit as many questions and then according to some of them, I'd have a listen to this. I'm just giving you the opinion. I'm not saying it's right. According to some of the mud hubs, what these two judges decide what these two arbitrators decide, it becomes obligatory on the husband or the wife, when the arbitrator, for example, says to the husband, you must do this says to the wife, you must do that, then it becomes obligatory because they're trying to solve the marriage.

00:18:51--> 00:19:33

This is stage number three, and that is the hacker man or the two arbitrators and ALLAH SubhanA. Allah says in this context, when he gets to that very end level, if the two of them want reconciliation, Allah will bring reconciliation about it's impossible that you pass this level, unless it has gone red, red red zone has been reached, you cannot pass this level, except holla. So it looks like the marriage is over. In which case, if both judges if both arbitrators say you know what this marriage doesn't seem to be working, perhaps divorce is better. If that is what is said. Then there is still one final step and that is the step of istikhara never, never, never undertake

00:19:33--> 00:19:59

any major decision of your life without praying. istikhara dear Muslims, Allah has blessed us with salatu istikhara you get a job you get an offer to move to another city, you're thinking of marriage, you're thinking of divorce, anything significant in your life, pray istikhara over this and do not undertake any decision without praying istikhara if after all of this, you feel that it is better for the both of you to part your way.

00:20:00--> 00:20:44

And then the proper procedure for divorce is to be followed. I'll talk about the procedure but before we get there contrast to this long procedure with one argument over a petty thing, and then the husband says Talaq, Talaq Talaq contrast this, how many steps must be followed? And then you look at people they say, Oh, I saw Paula three times. What am I going to do now? Are you planning to know but she says something I got angry. Divorce is never given spontaneously, never. Divorce is never given in a state of anger. You think about it and you plan it. Allah says in the Quran finised Tada Padalka, once they have decided sure there as the as a means to make sure once they know they

00:20:44--> 00:21:24

want to divorce, it's never done in haste. Unfortunately, the majority of our divorces are done in haste and anger, unplanned and spontaneous in a moment of swiftness, which they then regret. Oh, what did I do now? I said, divorce Subhan Allah, Allah gave you a responsibility and Allah gave you a MACOM and you abused that like the prophets Allah said I've said playing with the religion of Allah yella buena will do the law. Nonetheless, once that decision is reached, and the both of them decide, you know what it is best, we parted our ways. Still, there is a procedure to be followed because still, Allah says there's a chance I might work a miracle. Allah says in the Quran, there is

00:21:24--> 00:22:07

still a chance you have to follow the procedure. What is the procedure? Dear Muslims, the Quran has not one not to a dozen verses about divorce. Think about it and read these verses. There is an entire chapter called Sudha Tada a chapter of Tanakh Have you read these verses? Have you understood the significance? Do you know the procedures in the Quran? Yeah, you Hannah B you either Pollock Ottoman Nisa, fatale ohana. Lyrid that they know absolutely. Allah is telling the Prophet SAW sent him and through him all of us. Yeah. Nebby if you want to divorce your women, divorce them in their proper times. It's not spontaneous. You don't just get angry and divorce, divorce them in the proper

00:22:07--> 00:22:49

times. And then you count there is what is the proper time. The proper time is that you wait for if she's in her monthly cycle, it is not allowed to do divorce for obvious reasons. during this timeframe. Emotions are different hormones are different. Don't know divorce can take place during that timeframe. Also, if you have been intimate with your spouse, you cannot divorce your spouse during that timeframe of intimacy until the next cycle happens and she finishes the cycle and then she takes a full bath. How is this hastiness compared to how is the hastiness of Muslims compared to the verses of the Quran divorce is never done spontaneously. The Quran tells the Prophet system wait

00:22:49--> 00:23:32

and divorce in the proper time Ibn Abbas said the proper time is you wait until the next cycle comes. If she doesn't have a cycle if she's whatever reason you wait one month, you wait until the cycle comes and you do not touch her. And then she does the hosel and then once she is pure and if you're sure you want to do it, then you give one divorce. This is the divorce of the Sunnah. This is the divorce that it should be done with contemplation with thought and you give that one divorce and then there it starts there it How long is there it does three cycles or three months if she doesn't have a cycle. And during those three months during those three monthly cycles, the Quran is very

00:23:32--> 00:24:14

clear Surah Tala read it loud to Khadija who name in Bucha Hiner wala Regina, neither should you Oh husband's expelled them from their houses, nor are they allowed to leave the houses. Unless Xena has a criminal law whether you are the biller, in which case obviously we don't expect the husband to to to do that. But otherwise, if it's just an argument, if it's any other issue, Allah is saying to both husbands and wives, you're not allowed to live in separate houses. Now obviously if that does happen, the divorce is still valid but you've contradicted the Quran you've contradicted explicitly command of Allah for three months listen to this and how many of you even knew the search that we

00:24:14--> 00:24:59

see what is happening in our society for three months? The husband and wife according to the Quran, need to live together in the same house under the same roof? But without any physical contact of the romantic kind? separate bedrooms okay, but the same house, Allah azza wa jal is testing you, you really think you can live without each other you really think you want to be away from her prove it for three months interact like an Adobe, but within vicinity. And if in those three months, one romantic even a kiss anything happens call us the divorces cancel handler the marriage resumes. This is an intended consequence of that three months because Allah says in this context, that I love

00:24:59--> 00:25:00

Allah you

00:25:00--> 00:25:36

Ready to buy the dollar camera, maybe Allah will bring something new. Maybe Allah will soften the heart. Maybe Allah will bring a new state of love between the two of them. You don't know in this three months when they see the exit doors open, and they know that they can walk through, you do not know what's going to happen to the psychological state of either one or both of them. Maybe they will realize that the pros outweigh the cons. Maybe the issue of the children may be this may be that so in these three months, neither is the husband allowed to expel nor is the wife allowed to leave while you're Regina very explicit, then if these three months go by, and still no

00:25:36--> 00:26:24

reconciliation has happened. In this case, they parked their separate ways, and she may marry another man and he is free to marry as well. This is one divorce. Another problem that happens unfortunately, and I have to be honest here. One of the main reasons for this misconception is the foolishness of the dramas that we see in our Muslim cultures of the triple divorce. A triple divorce is against the Sunnah by unanimous consensus of all of the scholars of Islam. It is haram. It is sinful. All the scholars unanimously agree. This is not the way you divorce. Unfortunately, some of our dramas and soap operas and whatnot, especially of certain countries, they make this issue like

00:26:24--> 00:27:05

common and people don't understand this is not normal. It is not the norm. It goes against the Sharia. The Sharia calls this Talaq victory, the innovated the rejected divorce, you're not supposed to do this. And if you do this, you are sinful. And then the scholars differ. You know, many men have say the three equals three have been to me and others. They argued the guy is sinful, but three equals one. That's a whole different debate. I've given a longer q&a about this, but the point being by unanimous consensus, this is breaking the produce of Allah and you are making a mockery. A man came to him in a bus and he said open a bus. I divorced my wife 100 times 100 times Ibn Abbas said,

00:27:05--> 00:27:42

As for the three of them, they are three and ask for the 97 then you took the book of Allah as a joke and you made fun of it. Another person can even Abbas, you said oh, we've been a bus. I divorced my wife, the number of stars of the sky. Ibn Abbas became so angry, he goes he started mimicking him, you have not a bus, you have a bus, you make a fool out of yourself and you play with the religion of Allah. And then you come running Yamuna Abbas, you have not been saved me, I cannot save you. You did it yourself. Now again, why did they even Abbas say this because I have made a policy that three equals three and this was the majority opinion, however, had been told me and

00:27:42--> 00:28:22

others they have a different opinion. I don't want to go into the filter discussion here. The point being by unanimous consensus, this is not the proper way of divorce, triple Talaq is not done in one sitting, it's not done, never ever, it should never be done. If divorce is to be done, you give one thought doc, after all of these procedures have been followed. And even then, if you take the wife back, it counts as one but out you still have two opportunities. And then if it happens, again, you have one opportunity. And then finally, at the very end after three, that is the final end if in case by the way, the three months go by and the husband wife separate and then after a few months,

00:28:22--> 00:28:57

and they're both single, they want to get married together again, no problem. And the Quran says very explicitly to the wealthy of the woman, the Quran says do not prevent her from marrying her ex husband. You have no right if she has decided that they want to give it another try. And they both want to come together with a new nigga. You have no right to stop them. And this happened in the life of the prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam that a brother, his sister got divorced and then the man came to propose again and he goes You embarrassed me You humiliated me? I will never give my sister to you. You will divorced her once. I'm never going to give her to you. Allah revealed in the

00:28:57--> 00:29:35

Quran. Surah Baqarah Fela Tao guru Hoonah do not prevent them from RE marrying their husbands if they both want to have a fresh start. So it is haram to do that as well. Dear brothers and sisters much can be said time is limited. i The positive said and memorize this. Whoever follows the Sunnah when they do the divorce, they will never regret it. Whoever follows the Sunnah procedure that I have outlined, then that is the proper divorce and you're not going to regret it. May Allah subhana wa Tada bless me and you within through the Quran, and may make us of those whose verses they understand and apply halal and haram throughout our lifespan as scholars forgiveness who was will

00:29:35--> 00:29:37

ask him for his love of food and the ramen.

00:29:47--> 00:29:59

hamdulillah all praises due to Allah, the One and the unique. It is He alone that we worship, and it is His blessings that we seek. He is the Lord of the oppressed and He answered the door of the week. You

00:30:00--> 00:30:41

Law is in the hands of the man. Okay, what if the woman for legitimate reason wants to leave the marriage? legitimate reason she has to follow the same steps, direct contact, get the family involved, get arbitrators involved. What if she has a reason and the husband doesn't agree that everything is fine. What should she do then? For the woman, the opportunity of breaking the marriage is called Hola. And that's different. It is reported in a cyber hottie that the wife of sabotage and ice came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and said O Messenger of Allah, my husband, sabots. Listen to this. I have nothing to complain about his Dean, or his o'clock. But I find myself

00:30:41--> 00:31:19

on the verge of being an ungrateful person, and I want to divorce I want to break up. Now footnote here. There was a personal issue between Sabbath and his wife. And when Sabbath approached his wife, she just felt this is not the man she wants to be intimate with. She's saying I have no problem with his Deen with his o'clock. But I just can't be a wife to this man. For whatever reason she felt this way. Now the fault is coming from her. He's not doing anything wrong. She's literally saying I have no complaint. He's a good man, good Muslim, he treats me well. But I just can't be with this man in that manner. I want to just break away. So the prophecy isn't without asking for habits without

00:31:19--> 00:31:54

going to him. Because in the end of the day, a wife is not a prisoner. A wife is a free lady. A wife has the same dignity and the same karma and the same respect. True, the Talaq is in the hands of the man. But it's not as if he if he doesn't want to call us the marriage is never gonna end. She went to the Prophet system, she gave a legitimate excuse. She goes, I just can't be with him in that manner. He didn't verify what else are you going to verify. But he did say you must give them a hardback. Now, it's not his fault, you must give them a hardback. And she said, Okay, I'll give them a hug back, I'll give her a she gave her a very expensive garden. So the Prophet system gave her the

00:31:54--> 00:32:29

hula. Now, the whole lot cannot be done without the husband's permission. And if the husband does not give permission, then the wife should go to the Islamic court. And the Islamic court will see like the Prophet CISM saw, if there is no Islamic court like in America, or what not, she may go to the local Imam that has been trained and knows when to give hola and when not to give Hola. In the end of the day, it is true that the woman the wife either has to give get the permission of the husband for the hola or she has to go to a higher authority. And then that authority will look in and the whole lot can be given or maybe not something else can happen after that. But the point

00:32:29--> 00:33:02

being that we have to be very clear here, a woman is not a permanent prisoner. It's not the way of the Sharia. And if a woman really wants to leave or whatnot, in the end of the day, if all of the procedures and protocols have been followed, then the books that say she cannot remain like a prisoner, it is her right to do that as well. And of course, this is especially the case of viously if there's abuse taking place or something of this nature, in which case we can jump over many of the steps of the husband is physically abusive, and he is not stopping. If the husband is doing things that are uninstalling, then obviously we don't expect her to remain in that household and to

00:33:02--> 00:33:51

suffer more abuse until she leaves and the topic of abuse is a sensitive one. Perhaps another day, I will give a topic or talk about that point being brothers and sisters, there are options. And before we finish up, we have to be very explicit. Going through a divorce, after you follow the proper protocols does not make you a bad person. There should be no stigma about divorce. A divorce see should not have a negative connotation. In fact, the majority of the Sahaba were divorcees the majority of them and we know of dozens of incidents of Sahaba and Sahaba. That are Jannetty people and they ended up in divorce. Just because you ended up in divorce doesn't mean you're a bad person.

00:33:51--> 00:34:32

Sometimes two people don't get along. Sometimes it doesn't happen. Zeynep and zayde. The both of them are the people of Jana. They couldn't get along they ended up in divorce a snob into the bucket and Zubaydah Brunel awam look at these two names. Zubayr and one of the how are you how are you of the prophets on the cousin zubaid and a smile the sister of Aisha look at their honor their cut them their status, they didn't get along. Eventually they end up in a divorce. There was no stigma attached, and the notion of a divorce see carrying a negative stigma. This is 100% cultural 0% Islamic and sadly, it is the women who carry the brunt of the stigma. For some reason the men seem

00:34:32--> 00:34:59

to go away scot free, even though it needs to be said that in most cases in most cases and every chef and Imam knows this it is the husband who is more at fault. And yes, in some cases no doubt the other gender is at fault as well. And usually both genders have done something to get to that situation. So there should be no stigma attached to marriage and so many divorce and there are so many Sahaba who went through multiple divorces and remarried over and over again. Unfortunately we have a problem in our

00:35:00--> 00:35:38

times by thinking a widowed lady or a divorced lady should not be touched and our Prophet Sall Allahu Allah. He was selling them married so many ladies. All of them were widowed and divorces, except for Aisha, think about that all of them were widowed and divorces. He didn't think there was any stigma in that. Another issue brothers and sisters is that divorce should be amicable as much as possible. It is said that one of the tab your own. He was contemplating divorce, his friend came to me said what what is the problem with your wife? Why are you divorcing? And he said, Do you think any man exposes the dirty laundry in his own house? I'm going to cover up what's going on? I'm not

00:35:38--> 00:36:14

going to tell you. Then after the divorce happened, the man came Okay, now can you tell me what's the problem of your wife? He said Subhanallah she is no longer even related to me. Why would I speak about a woman who is an Obeah from me. This is the a HELOC of divorce. certain problems we're not talking about abuse by the way, but you know o'clock the issues or anger or whatnot, no need to spill the beans and expose the laundry. You cover the faults of your believer if this is the case with any two than how much more so about husband and wife as much as possible. If it's a personal issue, no need to tell everybody and badmouth the other party. Sometimes marriage does not work out.

00:36:14--> 00:36:54

And the final point brothers and sisters is that one of the most amazing rulings of our Shetty. Allah says in the Quran, if you're going to let them go, and if you're going to give them a divorce, then Allah says one material one parallel musi Ricardo, who will add more criteria for the rule. When you give them a divorce, and they're about to leave, gift them a gift. The rich person should give a gift that is worthy of him and the one who doesn't have that much money. Let him give a gift that is worthy of him. Can you believe you are divorcing, and Allah says you have to give a gift or husbands This is our *ty I compare this with how it actually happens in our society with all of

00:36:54--> 00:37:33

the vulgarities and the drama and this and that. Compare the Quran and the Sharia with the reality of our lives. Even when you're partying and it didn't work out. Allah says to the husband, if you're rich give her a rich gift and if you cannot afford give what you can afford, but you must give something to the lady that you have divorced Subhan Allah just to cleanse anything just to try a new start and then Allah subhana wa Tada says in the Quran, that we're in Yetta Farakka and if the two of them are going to split up Johan Illa, who could Allah mince it? Allah will take care of each of them from His bounties. Don't worry, divorces, problematic divorces, troublesome divorces painful we

00:37:33--> 00:38:11

all know this. But Allah says if it is done properly, and if you reach that stage where you're heading different ways, Allah says, Don't worry, I will take care of each of you. And by the way, the famous verses that we all read woman yet tequila Yoda Allahu Maharaja where women hate hula. Whoever puts his trust in Allah, Allah will provide a means for him from a place he didn't expect. Do you know these verses are unsuited to Talaq and they come right after the verses of Tanakh. It is as if Allah is saying, Don't give up hope or divorce or divorce. See, don't give up hope or widowed lady, don't give up hope or one who has gone through a traumatic divorce. Do not give up hope. Put

00:38:11--> 00:38:51

your toe what could in Allah and Allah azza wa jal will bring about a new set of affairs woman yet what can I do Allah He who will has smooth this is occurs after the context of divorce, Allah is saying, Don't worry, I will take care of you. So keep your spirits high. Put your trust in Allah subhana wa Donna and husbands and wives try your best. Try your best to maintain marriage if it is not working out, follow all do these protocols. And if at the end you decide to part ways do it properly and if you do so, then you will do so with a clean heart and with no problems on the day of judgment if you don't follow the Sunnah. Then as the prophets of salaam said you are playing with

00:38:51--> 00:39:30

the book of Allah and playing with the Shetty of Allah and we seek Allah's refuge from ever ever doing that Allahumma indeed, aminu Illuminati I barely know me them but you love Africa. What a Hammond Illa for Raja wala Dana Illa Kadota, while Maria von Illa Shia feta, well I see Ron Illa your Sarita Allah ma fildena What is one in the Lydia sub Hakuna Iman, what a teacher I feel Kuruvilla Zilla Lilina Amanu Robina in Nicaragua Rahim Allah Houma is a Islam and Muslim in Allahumma Israel Islam are well Muslim in Allahumma, Ariza Islam on Muslim in Allah Houma and Aradhana are other Islamic seminaries who unfortunately have been FC which outed me Roho feet at VT

00:39:30--> 00:40:00

yah yah yah as he is rebirth Allah in Allah to Allah Amara compatibly embedded BBFC within NaVi Malacca the Odyssey was hailed as a become a Yoda an engineer were insane for kala Azim according Idema in Allah Hamada could also Luna other Nebby Johanna Deena am and will swallow it he was sent the Moto steamer Allahumma salli wa salim roboticle Well, and then of course with Mohamed the he was so heavy on marine paper the law in the law Jota Allah yeah motivated idli what exactly what you tell you the Cordoba wayang

00:40:00--> 00:40:08

manufacture I will warn carry well Buffy you're either coming Allah come to the Quran, the Quran Allah Allah Allah Allah the Quran, wash Korea Sidra come what are the quiter Allah Akbar welcome is Salah.

00:40:20--> 00:40:23

Long Lycopodium long like above a shadow

00:40:24--> 00:40:25

wall

00:40:27--> 00:40:36

Mohamed wants to know more how you know sauna do for y'all and further for the governmental solder to build your bomb

00:40:37--> 00:40:41

Allah along like long like mobile

00:40:44--> 00:40:50

more still tend to do a lot of work

00:40:56--> 00:41:11

Alhamdulillah here robbing me in Ramadan you're robbing Maliki Dean E. Kana wound on one

00:41:12--> 00:41:12

canister

00:41:13--> 00:41:31

thing. It did not set off on Zoom was stalking sled on COVID-19 I'm Johnny him on eating Malgudi on him model morning.

00:41:33--> 00:41:34

Me

00:41:37--> 00:42:17

what Dini was a 2120 Seni no Hi Jenna Bernardin Amin. Loco hottie O'Connell in Santa Fe Sun Ito calling zoom out Adana, US fell as feeling ill Latina man who I mean Oh Sonia hottie follow whom Urgell don't know on your own. I'm known. Farmer young caribou, Calabar doing being dean Erna you sound more hooby gammon ha Kimi Allahu Akbar

00:42:23--> 00:42:25

semi Allahu naman Hamidah

00:42:28--> 00:42:32

along come

00:42:38--> 00:42:39

along who I Cubone

00:42:43--> 00:42:45

along

00:42:53--> 00:42:56

along

00:43:00--> 00:43:23

Alhamdulillah here healed I've been on Amin or Ragna Rahimi Maliki a woman Dini yuck and agua de want a kindness dying in the no sleep at all it's one of them was dumping mostly at all it's on Latina and I'm gonna eat him on eating and mobile boom behind him Why don't balling

00:43:25--> 00:43:26

mean

00:43:27--> 00:43:45

either no soon long he was in fact, while at 1.0 Nephi Dean is here FY first bit Behanding on our beak I was still fiddling in

00:43:49--> 00:43:50

along with them

00:43:56--> 00:43:58

semi Allahu naman Hamidah.

00:44:02--> 00:44:04

Along

00:44:11--> 00:44:13

along uncover them

00:44:17--> 00:44:19

along like a bone

00:44:25--> 00:44:28

along

00:45:04--> 00:45:09

center more than kumara Mattoon more

00:45:10--> 00:45:13

a Salah more income water

00:45:14--> 00:45:17

all.

00:45:50--> 00:46:06

Salam Alaikum just a reminder on your way out play at least a $20 for Majida operation inshallah. We still have debt. Zilla count in its active. You can still donate through Zell cash check or sell operations at Epic mooji.org salon.