Taboo – Normalizing the conversation #01

So

and that's how we perceive these topics. We shouldn't discuss it, it's a bad it's something like only a certain people can address it, but not anyone. That's why I learned the lesson. And I addressed my children on these topics from very, very early age to an extent now when we talk about porn addiction, and marriage and all that they don't feel uncomfortable anymore. If those those topics like we mentioned, we will talk about pornography later, but 42 billion people had visited one single porn site in the year 2019 42 billion people have visited one single website on a single year.

So if pornography itself is very normalized and accessible, and super prevalent, why can't we make the conversation around it also normal? Why can't we educate now our children about the harmful impacts of pornography without saying I don't know when the right time comes and the right time believe me never comes. We just say the right time will come but it never comes. Now from the Muslim perspective, the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him have actually normalize these conversation. These conversations from day one, I'll give you a couple of stories. Before we get into it in sha Allah, for example, a man came to the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon and that man was known to be

among the companions, the friends of the processor, and according to our beliefs, as you know, Muslims, the Prophet Muhammad wa sallam said that the the best of all generations is my generation, my people, so this person was one of the best of all generations, according to the testimony of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam that a man came to the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him in front of other people, and he told him, You, rasool Allah, all messenger of God, allow me to commit adultery.

Then Lee Zina, allow me to commit adultery, fornication,

so the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him.

He responded, in my opinion, very strangely, because his job his role, at that time was to educate to tell us what's right and what's wrong to teach, hey, don't you know that it's wrong? Don't you know that it is prohibited? This is the expectation.

I'm a teacher myself in a classroom, if any of my students will go against the class, room policies, I say, don't you know that we you should place your stuff in the folder. That will be my attitude as a teacher. But the Prophet SAW Selim, did not even mention haram prohibited in that whole narration. Instead, he reasoned with the man he told him, I thought law holy omic. Would you like this to happen to your mother? Is this something that you be happy to hear about your mother doing? He said, No. How about your sister said no. How about your daughter? How about your aunt? He say, no, no, no, no. Then the Prophet SAW said I'm reasonably with the man and he told him, other people too, who

didn't like this to happen to their mothers, sisters, daughters and so on.

Ever since the man never committed such a heinous act. So the prophets, but the prophets of salaam allowed the conversation. The Prophet sallallaahu Salam allowed the discussion, he did not shut him up and say, How dare you speak about this in front of me. And he's one of the best of all generations, I want you to imagine this. Sometimes our children come and say, Mama was browsing on the internet, and I saw a picture that is

somehow inappropriate. And as a result, that boy might be slapped, scolded screen that you must have been watching this shame on you. And as a result, that boy never returned back when something serious happened to him. When molestations happen. I'm a counselor and I have seen many people who would say,

to me in a confidential space, of course, that they'd be molested by Quran teachers in the past, and that led them to become addicted to sexual activities, including pornography. Why did he tell the parents because they knew the outcome? They knew the parents don't allow that discussion.

Oh, Mussolini came to the Prophet SAW Salem and she told him how rasool Allah in Allah Allah stuck him in our hug.

Allah God Almighty do not shy away from the truth.

Then she asked her question, she said, do we also as female

and take a bath after discharge take place when we see some sexual dreams or some wet dreams, do you also take a bath? He said yes. If you see the the liquid discharge then it becomes compulsory upon you to take a bath. Again the prophets Allah Salam is allowing these what we call today's sensitive conversations taboo. How dare you talk to this and look at this, the questioner is a female here.

And don't tell me the Prophet SAW Selim was the prophet of Allah subhanaw taala. So, you know, he allowed that conversation, but we shouldn't talk about it today. He was our role model. Allah subhanaw taala God Almighty said in the Quran.

Look at the cannula comfy Rasulillah he also atone Hassan

in the example,

in the example of the Prophet SAW Salem lies a role model for you to follow.

So he was not just talking

out of nowhere, so that you can't come today and say, Oh, he's a prophet, I can you know, we cannot compare ourselves to Yes, he has his status definitely. But his life his entire life was for us as an example, for us to follow. So in sha Allah Allah the main intention behind this workshop is to allow these conversations, because if we don't have them, the problems will keep on coming and we will not be able even to deal with them.