Channel: Tim Humble
Series: Tim Humble - The Muslim Family
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leeuw Alhamdulillah lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Salatu was Salam ala Abdullah he was solely Nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi h mine Assalamu alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.
All praise is for Allah. And we ask Allah azzawajal to exalt dimension and grant peace to our messenger Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, to his family and his companions. This is another episode as part of our short course on the Muslim family brought to you by element rasa Amalia. And in the previous lesson, or the previous part of the course, we had spoken about the IEA. In shorter room, women AR T and Haleakala come in and for SQL as well as Andy tests cuando la wa Jalla Bina Kumar Tiwari in Effie datacolor, a Tinder komiya, to have a current
talking about the signs of Allah and that from among the signs of Allah azzawajal show the power of a Lost Planet, Allah and His might. And his cutter, his decree and his wisdom and his knowledge is that allies are gel created, husband and wife, he created the spouses. And we talked about some of the benefits of that we talked about some of the purposes and the goals behind it to achieve tranquility. And we talked about the love and the mercy that our last panel to Allah puts between the husband and the wife. Moving on from that now, I'm going to talk about an AI in sort of nice app. And this is number 21. And I think this has a very strong or a very powerful message as it
relates to marriage and its importance in Islam. Allah azza wa jal said, what a Fatah Horner Hawkeye the F bar bow will come in about what a husband I mean, come me, Sal Khan, Oliva, Allah said How could you take it back? Either the Mao he is talking about the Mao wakad f Baba will come in about when the two of you had gone to each other it physically matter of intimacy. What a husband I mean, come me, Sal Khan, Holly Eva, and those women I your wife has taken from you a heavy oath, me Falcon calleva, heavy covenant. So Alliance, which are described marriage as a covenant, and he described it as being highly weighty. That tells us that marriage is something very serious in Islam. And it's
not something to be taken lightly, also tells us that it is a covenant, as we said, it's an agreement whereby
the husband has certain agreement things he agrees to in certain expectations, and the wife has something that she she some things she agrees to and certain expectations that she has, and that that covenant, or that contract is not something which is light, it's not something simple, like a matter of buying and selling like lb or Shira. It might go and buy something and sell it and take another one and it's something which is highly it's very serious and very heavy in the sight of Allah and just understand how serious this oath is in the sight of Allah azza wa jal, Allah subhanaw taala used this term meetha, Oliva or similar to it and mythique which is heavy awaited covenant.
For two other things in the Quran. Allah azza wa jal used it to refer to the covenant that was taken from the prophets that was taken from the prophets, that they would believe in the Prophet that was sent after them and they would support him. And that covenant that was a covenant to believe in the oneness of Allah, and to believe in the prophets that our lives are just sent. Allah subhanaw taala use a similar word to describe it. And likewise, when Allah azzawajal took the covenant from Benny Israelite and he raised the mountain over them, and that way at all said Allah subhanaw taala took from Benny Israel, Allah use the same words to describe that also mythical kind of highly evolved.
So this tells us that marriage is something very, very serious and very weighty. It's not something to be taken lightly, and it is me. It is a covenant. So there are expectations on both sides. There are agreements that are made on both sides, and it has to be fulfilled by both people. And it's not just a covenant between husband and wife. It's
covenant between the spouses and between Allah subhanaw taala. And we know this from something which the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told us and we will come to the Hadeeth inshallah to Allah later on when the Prophet sighs have told us that we have taken our wives as a covenant with Allah be with in terms of being a covenant with Allah subhana wa tada and something that is our responsibility in it is towards Allah subhanaw taala. So it's not just a covenant between the husband and the wife, but it's also a covenant between the spouse and between Allah subhanaw taala
in Salta, Nisa, Allah azza wa jal told us what in Clifton Ella Toko suto philleo Tamar, thank you home. alpar Bella camino Nisa Messner Westwood, Arthur robear for in Clifton, and letter it to our heads and Elma malakut a man Oh, come there Lika Edna Terrell, Eliza, whichever said and if you fear that you will not be just with regard to the orphans then marry matabele what you are happy with what makes you happy. from among the women Messner was will as our back two or three or four and if you fear that you will not be just in one or whatever your right hands possess. Here in the eye. What I wanted to talk about is the ruling of marriage. here Allah Subhana Allah said thank you, who
matar Bella cumin and Lisa Marie, who do whatever you are happy or whoever you are happy with, from among the women. So Allah subhanaw taala commanded us in the ayah to marry and we know that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam also commanded us to marry we come to the next ayah ally xojo told us in Salta Nord in a number 32 lanky hole am minko masala hain I mean a baddie Kumar in equal in Kunal fukada Ione himolla, home in family while la who was here on early Eliza gel he commanded us and he said, marry the unmarried among you, as well as the righteous from among the male and female slaves. If they are poor, Allah will enrich them from his virtue. And Allah is worse here on
adding allies or gel commanders to marry. And we know that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam also commanded us to marry in a hadith of Anna Sidney Malik he said Robbie Allah one can also lie sallallahu alayhi wa sallam mia modelbuilder way in her need to go back to the Navy and shader. We are cool tozawa juluca dude and wallowed in NEEMO Cassio B como MBR yom al qiyamah. The Hadees narrated by Al Imam Ahmed was declared so here by my bad
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and as rhodiola when he says that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam used to command us to get married. And he used to forbid us from celibacy, where a person deliberately or consciously stops themselves from getting married. In other words, it's not because they just didn't have enough money at the time or they couldn't find the right person up until now, but they consciously and deliberately chose not to get married. And he used to forbid celibacy with a strong prohibition navy and shady Dan hughster strongly prohibited and he used to say marry the one who is what dude and while he would marry the woman who is loving and will bear you many children, for I
will boast of your numbers before the prophets yarmulke gamma.
Actually, this tells us one of the purposes of marriage and that's another reason why I included this hadith right here is that first of all, it tells us the importance of marriage and again, it emphasizes the command of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam to marry and the prohibition of celibacy and a person trying to get near to Allah by not getting married, he mentions all of those things, but it also tells us one of the purposes of marriage is to have many children. And it also shows you that if the Muslim family is right in terms of the husband and the wife and they are upright and righteous, then inshallah they will have children that are inshallah to Allah, upright
and righteous, and that will be a cause for supporting the Muslim nation they own of Islam, that they will become bigger that they will have a larger number. And of course the ones that the Prophet size Sam is going to mention their numbers, they are the righteous Muslims. So it shows you about the importance of you know, striving to have righteous
offspring. But who is the one then that it is? Or what is the ruling of marriage in Islam in terms of the ruling as it relates to fit?
Is it obligatory? Is it recommended? Is it permissible? Is it disliked or forbidden? Or does it depend on the person? So this is where the scholars, they generally say that the general rule of marriage is that the general
where marriage fits in for most people is that it fits in the category of animals to have that which is highly recommended. However, it can become obligatory for a person, it can get to the stage for a person where it is obligatory for them to do so. And that's why I'll code to be Rahim Allah to Allah. He mentioned a very nice definition of the one that it is obligatory upon them to get married, he said Elmo Stockley and ledi er hafele dot Allah, Allah NFC where Dini he, he said, the person who is able, and who fears for his religion, and himself. And that can also, by the way, refer to a man or a woman, a person who is able, and who fears for a harm coming to themselves or
their religion, that can only lie or interfere with alika and who elaborate as a witch, he said, this person, the only way that they can remove that harm from themselves and from their religion is to get married, then there is no default disagreement. There is no disagreement to lie your telephone fee will Jube act as which it is not, there is no disagreement that it is obligatory for that person to get married. So if we say that in a general sense, the ruling of marriage falls under the muster head back to the things which are recommended. But we say that it can easily go into the logic, and particularly in this day and age that we live in today. In this day and age, where we
live in today, who is it that can say that they don't fear for a harm for themselves, or for their religion if they don't get married. Now, what I really liked about the definition of a quote to be here is that he said al Mustafa, you're the one who is able, because some of the scholars mentioned similar similar expressions and similar things. But when they mentioned these expressions, and these things, not all of them mentioned, the one that is able, in reality, this is essential, it's essential that the person for it to be wajib upon them, they have to be able, they have to be able otherwise law you can live alone. Epson Ilsa Allah doesn't burden a person beyond what they can bet,
but a person who is able to get married and they fear for a harm for themselves or their religion, and the only way for them to remove that harm from themselves is to get married and that is the person that we say that it is worship upon them to marry. And it goes outside of just being among those things which are most to have or which are recommended. Marriage is one of the sunon of the NBA. And as probably a lot more and narrated in the NFL, I mean as Harbin Nabi sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, as virgin Nabi sallallahu, alayhi wasallam and Emily he facil.
And it's narrated that some of the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, they asked some of the wives of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam, one of the wives of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam about what the prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam used to do in secret meaning when he was unemployable, what he used to do at home when he was not in front of everyone for call about boom, letters A word UniSA will call a bar boom.
What color bar boom, la lfu rush for hammy de la ha what a snare it he will call mirboo Aquaman corluka work either lacking knee or solely What? What also more often will act as a word UniSA feminine Raja and suniti felly semi knee and the Hadith narrated by Al Bukhari and Muslim some of them said when they heard how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam used to be with his family and how used to be in secret and what are all of the acts of worship that he used to do. Some of them said I'm never going to get married.
And some of them said that I'm never going to eat meat.
And some of them said I will never sleep on my bed in other narrations that they will fast every day and they will not miss a day that they will pray the whole night and they will not sleep when the Prophet salallahu it was
selam heard of this, he praised Allah. And he mentioned the praises of Allah. And he said, What is the matter with some people who said this and that, rather I pray, and I sleep.
And I fast and I break my fast and I marry women. So whoever turns away from my son is not one of me.
We learned that marriage is a Sunnah from the sunon of the NBA and it's from the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. And that turning away from it is not something praiseworthy, not something which Allah as he loves it, the person who says I will worship Allah, by turning away from marriage, or by not giving attention to the marriage. And that's all sorts of analyzed, not just about not getting married, because maybe a lot of people who are watching this may be married, perhaps even the majority.
But it's also about the person who turns away from their marriage, turns away from the importance of it and says, I'm worshiping Allah. I would rather be spending my time worshiping Allah and they don't give attention to it. The Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is that he would pray. And he would sleep. I mean, he would pray some of the night he would sleep some of the night, some days he would fast other days he wouldn't fast and he got married. And so that shows you that there is no good in turning away from marriage, in order to get nearer to Allah, or disregarding it or considering it to be something insignificant in comparison to no other ways or other means of
getting near to Allah subhanaw taala. So from this, we learned that it is a means of getting near to Allah and it is something which is important in the sight of a lion it was important to the Prophet sallallahu it was said
in another Hadeeth, the hadith of Abdullah even he was rude or the Allahu anhu man the Hadith in Bukhari and Muslim. He said, Call Elena Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, Jamar Shara Shabaab many Stata I'm in como el de at affiliate Azur, which, for in what are called bully boss or Sonali Forge, woman, Lamia still there Finally, he be sewn for in a whole level, which
is another Heidi generally encouraging marriage and also telling us some of the purpose or one of the purposes behind marriage and also looking at those people who are unable to get married as well. So as we said, this is the Heidi throughout the live animus road, Ravi Allahu anhu. That he said that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to us, all group of young men, yeah, Marcia Shut up. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam directed this hadith towards the Shabaab towards the young men. And the scholars say the reason for this is that they are the ones that it's felt that this advice would be most important for them. This advice goes to all of the Muslims, but
it's the young men that the prophet SAW Selim, he directed this advice to because it's most likely going to be those who are unmarried, who are maybe thinking Should I marry? Or Shouldn't I marry or group of young men, whoever of you is able to do Alba? Now Alba is a word the scholars differ over some of them said it is the physical ability to get married, to be able to have the physical abilities to get married. But the majority of them said here, Alba is the financial ability to get married. So whoever view is financially able, affiliate has a wedge, let him get married, wherever a view is financially able let him get married.
Here, again, financially able, and maybe we can talk about this in more detail later on. It doesn't mean that necessarily has to own a house, in a car. And, and, and, and have a huge, you know, highly paid salary and highly paid job and a big salary and so on. That's not what it necessarily means. But it means that the high he has enough to be able to fulfill that responsibility to fulfill that act, that agreement, and he will we can call it that Misuk that covenant, to be able to fulfill it properly, and to be able to say that he actually fulfilled the conditions of marriage properly. That is what is meant by Alba. Now, here we have two extremes. We have those people who maybe don't give
any, any attack or don't pay any attention to this to the issue of this. They say well, Allah subhanaw taala will give me soil
and maybe those people might fall short in their requirements. I they don't think about the money that they spend upon their family. They don't think whether they have any whether there's any difficulty for their family or not. So that is one side of it. But the other side of it are those people who keep on delaying and delaying
And delaying marriage until it you know, a point which will never ever come or which may never come, which is just keeping on adding more and more requirements. And likewise, the parents who add those requirements for their children, they say, don't get married until you have this, don't get married until you finish this, don't get married until you have at least this much don't get married until you have such and such a possession or such and such for example, you you own your own house, and you own your own car and you have such and such amount of money. This is all an also an exaggeration and something which is not from the religion of Islam. Rather, the religion of Islam liking
everything is worse off, it's in the middle, there Yes, a person has to bear in mind that they have enough money to be able to fulfill the expectation and the needs of their family. And those expectations and needs differ from person to person, they're not the same for everybody. So if you marry a princess, then you need to be able to provide her with a palace. That's the simple reality of it. But people are of different levels in terms of their expectations, their financial expectations, and what they need, and their you know, their needs, and so on. So ultimately, this is something which differs from person to person, but it is given a counter in Islam, that the man can
fulfill the basic requirements of getting married.
Fairly it is or which let that person get married, let that person get married. For him now who are God elbasan. Because this is going to be better in helping that person to lower their gaze, while our sun will enlarge. And it's going to be better in protecting their private parts. That is what is two purposes or even if we want to gather it together into one purpose and call it chastity, one of the major purposes of marriage, to achieve chastity to achieve the fact that the husband and the wife no longer look at, or nor have no desire or no need to look outside of their marriage to fulfill that those needs that are Lost Planet Allah has created them with.
So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told us here that a person who gets married will help them to lower their gaze and it will help them to be people who are just women Lem, yes, Dr. Farley, he was sown. And whoever is not able because there will be people who are not able because the Prophet sighs I'm said minister, I mean CamelBak whoever Have you has the ability, whoever who is able. So that means that there are going to be some people who are not able those people find a song let that person fast for in a hula hoop, which this will be a means of cutting off their desire. So a person says I'm finding my eye you know, sort of wandering from place to place I'm not I'm not
protecting myself in that regard the way that I would wish a person says failure does Oh, which let that person get married. And then he says but I can't get married because the moment I'm in my circumstances are such that I can't get married. Then if the person is in that situation, finally he assumed Islam gives him an alternative and that alternative is too fast. And that fast will be a way of protecting that person and it will be a widger cutting off, it will cut off that person's desires until such a time that they are able to get married inshallah to Allah. This is something that Allah azzawajal also told us about in the Quran. When Allah azza wa jal spoke about the characteristics of
the believer that fly home you know, one of the things that ally xojo told us about insults and what mean on it is number five, well levena homely Fuji him have his own Illa Allah as well gee him Omar malakut, a man or home for in Hawaii Romero mean
those who protect their private parts except from their spouses, or the ones that their right hands possess, and they will not be blamed for that. So that's another evidence for one of the purposes of marriage being to achieve that chastity and being to provide a halal alternative to that which Allah subhanaw taala has made Haram in that regard, the last Hadees that we're going to look at the Hadees of Aqua even armor, or the Allah one and this hadith in Sahih, Al Bukhari and Muslim that he said Kala Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in a Sheltie and you will be Mr. Hillel to be healed for which he said that the most deserving condition for you to fulfill or the most deserving conditions
in some of the narrations for you to fulfill are those which make the private parts hollow. Not just really shows us the seriousness again of marriage, and the seriousness of these conditions. And the short It comes with the record the rights that it comes with, and the record
agreements that are made between husband and wife and how serious and important they are in Islam, we're going to conclude the episode with that Hadith or even an early Allah and and in the next episode in sha Allah, Allah we're going to look at the characteristics of the husband, those characteristics that we should try to embody in ourselves and that if a person is looking to get married if there is a sister looking to get married, that she should look for in a husband, or that the sisters family should look for in a husband so we've taken it from a comprehensive sort of viewpoint and try to look at the characteristics that should be there within the husband inshallah
tada that's what a lies which had made easy for me to mention and aligners best wa Salatu was Salam ala nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi ajmeri
as salaam alaikum. If you're enjoying these videos, and you'd like to keep up to date with all of the courses we're going to be running, make sure you head over to am [email protected]