Season 2 Ep 14

You're listening to the productive Muslim podcast, season two episode 14

Assalamu alaikum productive Muslims. Welcome to the show. I'm your host me for America and I am here with day 14 of the pre Ramadan bootcamp. In this episode, I'm going to be speaking to you about dealing with negative and discouraging people. So how can you have a productive Ramadan when people around you unproductive or even discouraging you? Because the thing is we are social beings. And we tend to get cues on how to behave or confirm from those around us, even those, even when we don't believe what those around us are doing are right. There's actually a famous psychology experiment that shows the danger of this behavior. And I will put that in the show notes of this episode. And

the Show Notes for this episode is productive Muslim podcast.com slash s to e 14. That experiment illustrates how we do things even if we do not believe they are right, just so that we can fit in with everybody else. So you might want to be productive and you know, it's the right thing to do. So you want to eat healthy, exercise more, be more spiritual and get more things done. But you may face a parent or a sibling or a spouse or friend that constantly puts you down and says you can't do that you're not good enough. And what can you do? Now here are three steps I have here to help you deal with such person.

Sara Monica, listen to Matt Ferriss found a productive muslim.com Hey, if you enjoyed this episode of the practical tips within it, that I think you'll enjoy a production model an online course. This is a one stop course for all the practical tips you need to overcome your Amazon challenges. For example, how do you manage your sleeping with bond when he is so late is toda so early? How do you manage your time a bond between work family and your spirituality, how to build good habits in Milan and destroy bad habits due to Milan that lasts after Ramadan, how to manage your work and your work colleagues, and so on and so forth. Check out this practice online course on productive Muslim

academy.com. That is productive Muslim academy.com. Thanks.

Now the first thing is to understand the underlying reason for this person's negativity. Now surprisingly, a lot of the times that a person is negative comes down to a person being insecure. What I mean by that is, for example, they don't feel respected or they don't feel loved or they feel bad things are going to happen to them. By understanding people's underlying reason for negativity, we can be able to empathize and actually step ourselves away from what they're saying, and not take it personally and just see that what they're saying is just a result of how they see the world and how they interpret things. Now, the second thing is to have compassion. What I mean by having

compassion is don't be judgmental of the negative person. See, don't try to put them down or let them have it or give them back their medicine so that you can make your point rather try and have compassion and understand why they are being negative. And the underlying reasons as I spoken earlier about being negative. Now when you have compassion to a person who's trying to put you down, you'll actually feel better about yourself and won't feel the pressure to conform to what they're saying.

Now, the third way of dealing with negative people is to take responsibility for your own productivity. Because let's face it, at the end of the day, you make the choices. You make the choice on when you want to sleep you make the choice on when you want to wake up what time you want to eat when you want to pray, when you're going to read Quran or when you're going to work and etc. By just knowing you have the choice and you are responsible for your actions is very empowering, because that way you know that no matter what happens, no matter what he said, you can control how you behave. Now you can control your choices. So as long as you're moving in the right directions

towards Allah subhanaw taala and he's pleasure and mercy then we shouldn't be affected by a negative person's comment. Another key lesson in all of these tips is to be mature and wise when dealing with a negative person. You know what's right and you know the impact that you have in your dunya and earlier when you stay productive and proactive. You see a negative person's comment might be disheartening, but it shouldn't ruin your plan and choices completely. Moreover, being a part of a community of learners and people who are self developing like we have in the productive Muslim Academy, or even as you're commenting in these show notes of this pre Ramadan boot camp, you're

hopefully surrounding yourself with enough positive people to help you make the positive changes in your life and overcome any negativity.

So as I close off this episode, I want to leave you with this

Hadith that you may have read below but try to reread it, try to hear it again with the above concept in mind.

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, the example of a good companion and a bad companion is like that of a seller of musk and the one who blows the blacksmiths bellows. So as for the seller of Musk, then either he will grant you some or you buy some from him, or at least you enjoy a pleasant smell from him. As for the one who blows the blacksmith's balance, then either you will burn your clothes or you will get an offensive smell from him. And this was narrated in Al Bukhari and Muslim so that ends off today's podcast. Before I close up I want to ask you, did you do your three daily challenges? If you've completed them or you've not completed them then let us know in our show

notes. And the show notes again for this is productive Muslim podcast.com slash is to iE 14 centrala I will speak to you all again tomorrow. Until then, work hard and be sincere