Social Justice – Episode 28 – The Rights of Extended Family

They were selling robotic arm Dakota silicon Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam. And he was he was sent him to Seaman Cathedral. So last week we talked about the framework for understanding the rights of the spouses. And this we've sort of been talking quite a bit or at least the last two helicopters have been about the rights as framed within a family setting. So the parents, the children, spouses with each other, and then it sort of becomes everybody else because it gets really complex after that, whether you're talking about in laws, uncles, aunts, stepbrother, stepsister, stepmother, stepfathers, cousins, and then if you're Palestinian cousins, cousins, cousins, cousins, it's like

100 of them on each side. And everyone's got a bunch of cousins, and you have all of these different people that get involved in the discussion of who is family and what does that come with? And what are the rights and responsibilities and regards to those broader extended families. So somehow, a lot tonight actually turned out to be one of the most beautiful halaqa is in preparation, at least I found it to be as such as when I was looking through the material and the content.

Because it really shows how Islam broadens that scope of mercy and compassion and love. And I personally, just really enjoy the narrations in this regard. I know that I told you guys that there probably wouldn't be class tonight, I thought I would be out of town. So hamdulillah I'm still here. So I appreciate those of you that came out. So we'll start in Charlottetown. And we'll try to frame this from different angles. We're trying to look at this through different angles. The Hadeeth we'll start with is a hadith narrated by be thought about the title. And it's really beautiful. And it's also tragic.

We've all heard of the martyrdom of Hamza or the Allahu taala. And on the way that Hamza Alon who was killed and Hamza was a beloved man so the prophets lie some the prophets lie some cried over Hamza, like he cried over nobody else. The sister of Hamza came running to the to the battlefield to see his body and she cried and cried and cried and wept over himself on the line. So he clearly occupied a major position in the hearts of those people around him in the hearts of his family members. And usually, what do you think of Hamza you think of Hamza the warrior, but he was a little the Alon who clearly was a very beloved man, to his people. Now, you don't hear about the effect of

Hamza's martyrdom on his family on his wife and his kids. Right. And that's just usually because those things get lost in the stories and the epic battles and in the tales, and this had these addresses what happened. It's actually a tragic scene that after Hamza law, the law tada and who was killed, the daughter of Hamza ran after the family of hams little the Alon who meaning his cousins and Ben Hashem basically ran after bento, Hashem crying, she pursued them crying, and he is the narrator. So it obviously is related to Hamza, how is it related to Hamza?

Ali is his nephew, okay. His father of a pilot is the brother of hamzat of the law. So I need the law and who is the nephew of Hamza? So as they're dealing with the aftermath of the martyrdom of Hamza and the way that Hamza was brutally killed, the daughter of Hamza comes running after the family. And the first person she comes to his ID, she recognized the love of God. And she went to Ali and Adil the Allahu taala. And who took her by the hand, and it's a very emotional scene. And on the low side, I'm told Fatima, his wife with a loved one who is also related to Hamza, of course, because she's the daughter of the prophets license. I don't want to lose you guys. I want you to

just appreciate the gravity of the scene and how everyone's got a connection here. Ali is the nephew of Hamza. So this is technically his cousin, okay. Fatima is the niece, the grand niece of Hamza, because Hamza is the uncle of her father, Muhammad Sallallahu wasallam. And they're married to each other. So they both obviously have a deep connection to this child. So I need on the lower end, who emotionally he takes the hand of this girl and he says to Hamza, I'm sorry. He says to Fatima, his wife that take your uncle's daughter, meaning that this is that she's coming home with us. Basically, she's our responsibility now and we're going to take her in. So Fatima picked her up,

then they don't have Ethan all the time. And we also stake the claim, and he wanted to take care of the daughter of Hamza Zayed was the adopted son of the Prophet sly salah and also paired off with Hamza when they migrated to Medina. So when they migrated in the Prophet slicin impaired people off he made them brothers, so they felt a connection to Hamza and Zaid said, let me take her in. And then Jaffa.

Jaffa, even a bit Olive the brother of Addy also said, let me take her and he said she is my uncle.

My daughter, and I have the greatest right to her. I have the greatest right to her. Now Jafar is the brother of it right. And Jaffa so that makes him his nephew as his nephew, but Jaffa was also married to a smart vinter mace, a smart vinter mace, who was the sister in law of Hamza bin tourmates is the sister of Selma intermix the wife of Hamza. Okay. A smart interface the wife of Jaffa is the sister in law of Hamza so that would make her related to this girl How How would she be related to the daughter of Hamza them cheese Herman maternal aunt. Okay, so Jennifer says, I have the greatest right to her. And when Jennifer on the line has said that in the prophets lie, some

said that the prophets, the prophets lie, some saw that the prophet SAW some ruled in the favor of Jafar because he said, I'll holla to women Zilla till he said the aunt, the maternal aunt is like the mother. The maternal aunt is like the mother. So it's best that she goes with the family of Jaffa and a snap vinter mace. Okay. Now, the reason why I start with the paddies is because this Hadeeth obviously comes in the context of custody. And the context of you know, who has the right to an orphan, if a person is if a child is left in that situation, but there's so much more to it than that. Why did the prophets license specify the Harlem For example, we start with the Hala, the aunt,

and particularly the harlot is the maternal aunt. Okay, the maternal aunt, the scholars mentioned that this goes far beyond custody, that the profit slice and I'm recognized something within the aunt and the special connection that someone should have with their harlot with their aunt. And so that would be Rahim Allah. He said that the aunt shares the status of the mother in kindness in bill in a column in honoring, and insula, which is in keeping the ties connected.

The art shares the status of the mother in bill which is kindness, Chrome, which is honoring her, and Sylla, which is keeping close ties. So how long my aunt visited me from Philly, my maternal aunt visited me from Philadelphia a few weeks ago, and it was it was really beautiful being in her presence and I wish I would have sort of read up on this before she came, I probably would have appreciated her visits so much more, although I knew this had teeth. So this is this is what the scholars mentioned, Bill, which is obedience and kindness, it kromm, which is honoring and Silla, which is maintaining the ties. And then there's a beautiful Hadith from Eben Amato, the Allahu

taala. And who were the prophets lysozyme was approached by a man who said to the prophets lie Selim that I have committed an enormous sin. Now, you might remember the Ibis story with the mother, right that I've committed a maid that he killed a man and even our bus

omocha hate, is your mother alive? And he said, No. So he told him just seek forgiveness from Allah subhanaw taala. But here is this is possibly where that message that methodology comes from. This man says to the profit slice, that I've committed an enormous sin is forgiveness. haleem and tober? Am I going to be forgiven from Allah subhana wa tada the Prophet slicin said, Hello, come in. Do you have a mother or the law? He said no, by the head. laka min holla? He said, Do you have an aunt? He said yes. So the prophets lie Selim said, So show her that bill that you would have shown to your mother show her that kindness that she would have shown to your mother. So the Prophet slicin

actually directed him to the maternal aunt. And there are many different extensions that we find from this, that are issued on the Allahu taala. And how, what was what was her kunia corneas or something or about something. What was her cornea?

Omar Abdullah, why?

Do you know?

Anyone know? Isola Bella Ron has named her Kenya was Omar Abdullah.

But she didn't have a son named Abdullah. And the the context of that is that she said to the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam that she was, you know, she that she kind of wanted to Kenya that she wanted to have a Kenya she wanted to be something, you know, and it was common in that time to give a kunia to someone about something or on something the father of or the mother of, even if they didn't have that child, or even if they hadn't given birth to a child like if you intended. So for example, in some cultures, it's common, or the oldest son to be expected to name his son after his father. So he's already about this, you know, he's the father of his father's name, right? That's

kind of given to him at an early age. So it shouldn't be allowed to complain to the Prophet slice and this goes back to marital rights. He complained to the Prophet slice Allah that all of her friends had Kenyans but she didn't have one. So he talked about emotional rights the profit slice I'm just go Are you serious like this make one up. He actually gave it thought. I'm sure he has a beautifully spoke about this in the

past.

Friday, about you know how the Prophet slicin listen to a shadow of the alarm hotel, this huge long story and he he weighed in very thoughtfully he didn't just dismiss it or like yeah, whatever, just do whatever you want. The prophets lie some listened to her. So the Prophet sized them said, Well, how about I give you the kunia of Omar Abdullah because she was the holla of Abdullah and his debate. She was the maternal aunt of Abdullah Mrs. obeyed Abdullah and his obeyed. His mother was who has a lot of you, Beckett, a lot of history here and refreshing your, your understanding of the prophetic biography. So because of that she was called Omar Abdullah, the mother of the loving is

obeyed because she was her collar. So this really further reinforces the notion that own and harder that the mother and the aunt are interchangeable, okay? They're interchangeable. There's another so that's regarding the maternal on some of these in regards to the paternal uncle

gets really specific here maternal aunt and then paternal uncle now we know that it's your mother than your mother than your mother than your father right? So the first right goes to and Hala first right goes to maternal aunt after the holler comes that the paternal uncle, where do we get that from? It's in regards to a hadith that's or to a hadith narrated about an advance for the Allahu Allahu Allah bus, the uncle of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam, the paternal uncle of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, every time an Ibis would enter into a room, the Prophet slicin would stand up, he would kiss him on his forehead, and he would sit him down on his right side, and he

would say, Hi there, I'm me, Heather. I mean, this is my paternal uncle. This is my uncle, Samantha feluda feluda he beat me so whoever wants to boast of an uncle. Look at my uncle, the prophet sighs I was making a bass feel good. And an Ibis felt bad. He said, The opposite of love a messenger of Allah. I don't deserve for you to say that. I don't deserve for you to speak of me in such high regard. And the prophets lie Selim said walima akoto Honda will tell me what appear to be will unwelded the Prophet sighs I'm so why should I not speak of you in such honorable terms and honor you in such a way where you are my uncle, you are the leftover of my father, but clear to me. You

are what's left of my father.

And he said, Well, I'm Weiland, and the paternal uncle is like a father. So the prophets lie. Some said the maternal aunt is like a mother. The paternal uncle is like your father. And he said this in another Hadith by the Allahu anhu, which is also authentic, and it's also in regards to the Prophet sighs I'm sorry about that. So I'm Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, we're in our ama luxury sin with a D o min sin we are be the Prophet size himself, versus the uncle of the Messenger of God. And indeed the uncle of a man is the equal of his father, or from the equal of his father. Okay symbol is refers to the equal of the Father. So first you have the Hadith, which mentions the

maternal aunt, and says that the holla the maternal aunt, is like your mother. And then you have the paternal uncle is like your father and that's why the prophets license sometimes was referred to

as the son of doubleton will tala was the uncle of the Prophet slice on them. But in cultural terms and societal terms, sometimes they would call him refer to him as the son of a mobile pilot, even though that, you know, he wasn't really his father. So the scholars actually mentioned the order amongst the uncles and the aunts just to show you, you know, how specific these terms were, that the first person after your parents that deserves honor is Hala is the maternal aunt, then comes

the paternal uncle, I know that you know, you guys are thinking mama chacha, all that stuff. That's really confusing for someone who doesn't speak to do by the way. Like I had to figure out why I'm getting called mumble and getting called Chacha and getting called different things, right. But in Arabic, it's am or HUD. Okay. Comes Salah from the maternal side. I'm from the paternal side. So first comes your father, your maternal aunt, second comes your paternal uncle. And then the scholars that continued they said, then comes your maternal uncle, then comes your paternal aunt. Okay. Why because the mother takes precedence over the father in terms of in terms of showing that love and

showing that honor. So they they actually some of them actually went in that, in that order behind all of these ahaadeeth. Obviously, the beauty of these ahaadeeth is the hidden reciprocation that's yielded from this extended family system.

This idea that it's all one family and that's why, you know, with the prophets lie Selim, you see that as he grew up, you know, due to the the poverty of

a multilevel multilevel his uncle needed help, basically distributing his kids amongst his nephews, his older nephews, it was an entire support system in poverty. So, you know, I needed the law on who was raised by the profit slice on them. Because even though he was his cousin, because it was a full time job to take care of my little brother, basically, so and he was brought in sort of like a little brother, because I will thought it was like a father to him. And, and Jennifer was taken in by Alabama, so Jennifer, technically was raised by a bus, not by autonomy, because it was that understanding that we all have to sort of take care of our own. And this, this sort of refers to the

way that the profit slice and M saw that extended family taking care of one another showing that love showing that honor, to the maternal aunt, to the paternal uncle. Now, why a lot of the scholars tried to talk about why the maternal aunt, why the paternal uncle first, because the person who's going to be most like your mother will definitely be if you have a father would be the maternal aunt, the person who would be most like your father would be the paternal uncle on the profits license spoke about it in terms of custody and a house that a person is being raised in, then, obviously, the goal is not just to provide from a financial perspective, but also from an emotional

perspective, as well, that, you know, that that the love that would be shown and the character so that there isn't such a radical change in a person's life, it's best to stay than to the maternal aunt, who could somewhat replace if you will, not replace but but take over for the mother and the paternal father who can take over for the Father, and maintain that type of of love. And somehow, you know, I, you find this in some of the, not too long ago, in, in Palestine, I'm just giving this example and Philistine because I'm very aware of it, the way that they would deal with a sudden death of a father. It was expected of the brother, the paternal uncle to sort of step in, right, and

he would marry the widow and take care of the children because he was supposed to then assume that role of fatherhood. So that extended family was meant to be one of support, not one of headaches. All right, not, not for the sake of making your life crazy. And piling on. I say it takes a village to raise a child. Well, this is how it works, right? Everyone sort of comes together puts their hands in. And you can also see that there's a stake in the entire family in the children that are growing up that I care for the success of my niece and my nephew, the same way that I care for my own son and my own daughter. Also when it comes to grandparents, also we find in the *tier. The

grandparents are like the parents, right. So you refer to them as well as father and mother and the inheritances as such, in some cases, the love and compassion is expected to transfer as well that the grandmother could be like the mother, the grandfather, like the father, as well. So this, this refers to the overall

the overall consumption within the Hadith of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. And then the scholars talked about cousins and Amato, the Allahu anhu mentioned that the closer the cousin is the more right that they have upon you. So these were things that were to be thought of, in every situation. So what does this mean in terms of, you know, the benefits of an extended family system?

That they that they that they spoke about? Okay. Well

first and foremost, it means that in regards to marriage, on two families come together, they also share their resources they come in and they try to both contribute to the human economic and and an emotional resources at the service of the newlywed couple and this is something we saw from the Prophet Solaris and I'm I haven't started with in laws yet for a reason. All right. When I do the alongside of Daniel and Fatima, or the allow Anna had a dispute, okay. Think about this. The prophet SAW his son comes home, and his daughter Fatima, his daughter, and Fatima was not just any dog. I mean, Fatima was the heart of the Prophet slicin. He loved his daughter. I mean, he adored Fatima so

much that it was I mean, it truly is, in and of itself a magnificent story, the way he treated her the way he honored her. He didn't just call her the queen of Jamaica. He treated her like a queen in this world. I mean, he used to sit her in his spot. He used to hold her hand. He used to kiss her all the time. He He used to say whoever hurts her hurts me. Whoever loves her loves me. It was all Fatima Fatima was the Prophet sly, salams little girl, and he comes home to Fatima and he sees that she's crying and he says Where is it? And she says, you know, we had a fight and he left

All right, he didn't leave to go, you know, somewhere in Mexico where people would go when they get angry or something like, he went to the masjid. So that's a good place to go if you're upset.

You went to the message of the prophets lie Selim, the prophets lie, Selim walks into the message, and he sees it all the time I'm laying down, and the profits license immediately diffuses the situation, he doesn't yell at him or curse him, you know, just because you you upset my daughter, you made my daughter cry. There's a sense of justice. And there's a sense of treating him like his own son. He walks up to the 11 home, and he starts you know, he picks him up and he starts patting the dirt off of him. And he says, pull me over to rob set up a father of dust, to rob this dirt. So sit up a father of dirt instead of

an ideal of the law on who was laughing the Prophet Sly Stone was laughing with him, like, come on. Alright, enough of this, go back home now. He didn't open, you know, he didn't open it up with the idea of the law. I don't say, Tell me what's on your mind those types of things. Or how dare you make my daughter cry right now and how he didn't make a judgment on the case. He didn't treat it wrongly. But it's like, you're my son. She's my daughter. And you both need to get get together and put this behind you. And so the profits license immediately defuse the situation I need to be alone. And so that became my favorite nickname. Alright, I want to rob the father of dirt instead of an

even me Father, I will tell you that he said it became my favorite nickname, since the Prophet slicin called me that that day. So it was endearing the way the profit slice, I'm trying to solve the problem. A lot of times when families get involved in marital dispute, they compound the issue and suddenly become possessive once again, and my daughter and my son starts to fall back into but we see from the spirit of the Prophet slice Allah truly becomes once my son marries, that's my daughter now. And once my daughter marries, that's my son now, and we, you know, we support them as a couple. And we try to make sure that we bolster their marriage, and we and we keep them together,

instead of leaving them to their own or immediately retreating back with our own child when things go wrong. So that support system is there, in the spirit of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. And it's interesting, some of the scholars also mentioned that

with the extended family, when you have a family, climate's when you have multiple people around, invested in different children invested in each other's welfare, that it also creates an oma like feeling, the feeling of community. And that feeling of community is nurtured. And that's the opposite of individualism and egotism, and everyone sort of resorting to their own self interest When, when, when when, when families come together, and they all try to raise their kids together, they try to raise their families together, and they're invested in one another's children. They also mentioned obviously, the benefits of

in regards to the mother, obviously, it's not did not prohibit a woman from working or from having a career, even in those early days. In fact, her earnings belong to her. But if she was a mother, having that nuclear family, or having that extended family, allows for some support system, for her to be able to take on multiple tasks at times. So that's why it would be encouraged as well.

And then finally, you know,

the idea of avoiding alienation old age,

alienation, old age, that many times in a hyper individualistic society, as everyone takes care of themselves, and only worries about themselves or worries about their own children and things of that sort, then there is a great chance of alienation and people, you know, dying alone. But this idea of people, you know, being together, taking that if my if my cousin, or if my brother doesn't, if my cousin can't take care of his father than his father's like my father, my cousin can't take care of her mother than her mother's like my mother. So that attachment actually has serious implications in regards to treating our elderly when they grow older, because sometimes the immediate children don't

have the capacity to take care of their own parents. But when you create that family like structure, then you make sure that everyone is taken care of and no one is left alone towards the end of their lives. This is something that we find within the poor and as well in the eye of age and one of the parts of the job.

Sort of neuro diverse 31 Allah subhanaw taala mentions, the houses of your fathers or the houses of your mothers or the houses of your brothers or the houses of your sisters and the houses of your father's brothers, or the houses of your father's sisters or your mother's brothers or your mother's sisters. It's all sort of spelled out and it's insinuated that you will frequents the homes of your extended relatives and you will always be together. And a lot of dimensions. There's no blame whether you eat together, eat separately, or when you enter each other's homes that you give that you give Salaam to one another. Obviously I just paraphrase the idea because a very long i 31 and

sort of didn't work or a lot as a gentleman

I'm calling from shuhada. Harold COVID notes is quarterly Benny Hinata. Remember de cada una de la Ilaha. Ibrahima ismar ito is hack Illa Hawaii, Donatella Hama Simone. Allah mentions and sootel Baccarat verse 133. Were you witnesses when death approached Jacob? when Jacob said to his sons, what will you worship after me? So he's talking to who? His children, the children of Yaqoob, the children of Jacob, and they said, We will worship your God, and the God of your fathers Ibrahim and is married and is happy. Is this marry a father of jacoba? Is he his uncle? He's his uncle Jacob is the son of Isaac, son of Abraham, but they included is married from the Father, the fathers of their

father, right, that is Marian and his half, as well as the grandfather, Ibrahim, it is salam, we worship one God and we are in submission to him. And Allah mentions it in regards to charity. Okay, well, that's a matter and I hope he he that will koruba will the aterna Wilma second, Alonzo JAL mentions that they give first and foremost to their relatives that will Cordova. So corba is a spectrum, closeness, how relative How close are they to you. But you start with your relatives when you give charity and you look to those that are within your extended family. And in almost every book of Zechariah. They mentioned that the greatest right starts with those who are closest to you

when you give yours a cup. And those who are closest to you means even within your relatives, when you find people within your relatives that are poor, that you start with them, and you try to take care of them as well. And allow similarly medicines and sort of the better the team and the nakaba. Looking towards the orphan have close relations. We saw a practical example of this. In the first leaf we mentioned today, in this in this situation of the daughter of Hamza that looked to the team and democra look to the orphan of your own close relatives of your close relations. You also have the generality of the Hadith about maintaining the tie the ties of kinship. And a lot of times we

don't want to take on the extended family because we feel like it might reduce from our provision and it will increase our responsibilities. And that's why the prophets lie. Selim said, Whoever wants to have his list expanded, His provision expanded, and his life prolonged, let him maintain the ties of kinship. Whoever wants to have his list, His provision expanded, and his life prolonged, let him maintain the ties of kinship.

He also mentioned Salatu was Salam that Allah azza wa jal has said, I am a black man, I am the most compassionate, I have created the womb and derived a name for it from my name, while him which is the womb comes from a black man the womb. So if anyone maintains the ties of kinship, then I maintain connection with him. And I cut off anyone who cuts them off that refers to the extended kinship as well that which is made connected to you through the womb that you try your best as well, to extend first to your blood relatives and then those that come afterwards. What else do we see from the companions on how they actually live this concept, another beautiful scene, a beloved Amato

the alongside and who was on route to Mecca, and he was riding his he was riding his donkey and he encountered a bed when men model the law and he says, Are you so and so he asked him, you know, are you and he mentions his name? And the man says yes, Amaro de la no gets down from me Norma gets down from the camel. I'm sorry, the donkey. It gets down from the donkey.

He takes off his turban. He puts his turban on the man. And he says, right, take this donkey and keep the turban on your head.

You know, you can imagine is just as random and seemingly random and on the way that he just stopped and he sees this this bedwin man walking and he says, Are you so and so on? He said Yeah. And he said, You know, he just takes off his turban puts it on his head gives him his donkey and then now he's walking and Abdullah and dinar

was with him. So his, you know, you imagine you're riding with with this man. And then all of a sudden we're walking and he doesn't give you an explanation as to why he just gave away his turban gave away his his riding animal. So I'm loving the nod looks at him and he says, does offer Allahu Allah He said, May Allah forgive you. So these are Bedouins, they're simple people, the guy would have been satisfied with a lot less than that. If you would have just given him like a few coins or given him some dates. He would have been happy he would have been satisfied and been on his way and thanked you. Right? It's like you go, you know, the homeless man that stops you at the intersection.

You give them $1 you give him 10 he'll be happy. You don't have to give him 100 right? It doesn't. So it just didn't make sense to him. Why did you give him all that? Why did you treat him that way? And I'm loving our model the allowance data and he said that this man's father

was a close friend of my father.

His father, the man's father, was close to my father. And he said, I heard the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam say that one of the greatest acts of kindness is for a man to kindly treat the loved ones of his father after his death. So he actually was living that Hadith where the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he mentioned in the abattoir. And yes, theological, Allah would would be prophets. Why Some said from the greatest acts of kindness and obedience to your father, is that you continue to maintain kindness and connection with those who your father loved those who are close to your parents. And so that was even Omar who actually narrates the Hadith. He heard it from the

Prophet slicin directly and he was a living example of that. We see that with the prophets license and the relatives of a digital the lavon. Right, the family and the friends of Khadija, after Khadija passed away long after she passed away, every time a gift came to the Prophet slice of them, he cut it up into portions and he sent it to the friends and the family of Khadija or the law of Taiwan. And every time he heard the voice of the sister of Khadija used to say Allahu Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, he would run to the door because her voice sounded like the voice of his deceased beloved one, Khadija all the love and honey always used to gift her with something he would

give everything that came to his house, to the friends and the family of Khadija, or the Allahu taala. And there is there is a practical application of this, that when your parents pass away, especially, you know, some how to reconnect with their friends, their close ones, their loved ones, and to just show them appreciation. Now, it's so easy to just send someone a message, send someone a card, let them know that you're thinking of them, to maintain that relationship to maintain that connection out of love for them. And this is something that the Prophet slicin I mentioned to us in a broader sense. So how does this relate what about the Hadith about inlaws? So I'm going to read to

all of the Hadith about inlaws. Are you guys ready?

There are no ahaadeeth biomass. So what's the conundrum here?

This is where typically in laws becomes, you know, burdensome, and it's tough for people to deal with their in laws, and what are the rights of the in laws and things of that sort. Technically speaking, they're not there, they're not actually listed out. So no, you can't tell your spouse that my parents are like your parents. They're not like her parents. And they're not like his parents, they're their parents, you should honor them out of respect for them and treat them with love. And you can show them that love and that's a son and excellence on your part. That's excellence on your part. That's love on your part. If the prophets lie, some honor the relatives and the friends of

Khadija will be allowed. What does that say about how we honor our spouses, parents or their brothers, their sisters and their families, as much as we possibly can. So all of that is in the realm of sun. And you could look at which is excellence in showing love and showing compassion. You can look at that in two ways. You could say, 100, I don't have to do anything for my in laws anymore.

Or you can look at that and say that every single moment of kindness and love that I show to my in laws is a means of getting close to a loss of hands out, when I honor my mother in law, like my own mother, that is a means of getting close to Allah, the means of bringing me to my closer to my spouse, whatever it may be. Those are all means by which I draw closer to my Lord and closer to my Creator. So the incentive is there. And then beyond that, truly just thinking about all these ahaadeeth What does this really mean here, what's what's at the root of all of these things that the prophets lie some taught us to do? When you love someone, when you truly love someone, you will love

those that were beloved to them, or that are beloved to them. You show love and respect to those that are beloved to them. So for example, the Prophet slicin I mentioned love me because of your love for Allah, and love my family because of your left for me. So we love the family of the Prophet slicin because we know how much the Prophet slicin loved his family. So we love them because we love the prophets lie Selim. We love the prophets lie some because we love Allah. Right? So when you love someone, you honor those that are beloved to them as well. And that doesn't have to wait until after they pass away. That's while they're alive as well. And that's a means of showing that love to them.

And that's a means of showing that desire to come close to Allah subhanho wa Taala and Allah knows best so May Allah allow us to always fulfill the rights of our kinsmen of our of those of those who are close to us, our relatives, and those who are beloved to our relatives, and May Allah subhanaw taala make us lights and joy to our communities and to those that are around me