Women and Ramadan with Shaykha Rukayya Samsodien
Channel: Irshaad Sedick
File Size: 58.67MB
Bismillah Al Rahman Rahim Al hamdu lillah wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah while early he was Sufi I'm aware that I'm Obeida said Mr. Lee Garoppolo obligato all the viewers I know nobody's doing this yet but you will in sha Allah and to my guests in studio shahada Yes, I'm sadena semana Graco
concert and what I heard alive it occurred to more than 80 shirts you can having me with you this evening we mectron show that it will be beneficial viewing for all inshallah I mean, I mean your blood. I mean, and I was actually looking at the previous post when you are on before it was a year ago. So heilala Feels like maybe a little bit more than a year or less. I'm not sure that's what COVID does. It's just over a year yes Subhanallah but I have been waiting for a long time to get you on the stream with us again because you are one of the leading female scholars in our country and in our city. I know you would like me to say that this spot there but there hamdulillah and I think
that is a lot of benefit to be taken. You know, we have a lot of guys on here. They tend to agree to these things far quicker. But I think there's a perspective that needs to be spoken about when it comes to Ramadan And now ladies so before we get into those perspectives I first want to ask you about your Ramadan how has it been what have you been up to? So heilala this Ramadan I think is one of the Ramadan I can say that doesn't honestly doesn't feel like it's flying by Hamdulillah that has been in the armor. Why do you think that is I also feel like that like it doesn't feel like it's flying by this time Allah Subhana Allah I don't know it was because we came out of COVID and not
really coming out but the measures have eased up and now we trying to do what we usually do in Ramadan. But I think we also tried to do extra now so the time we feel that we lost and the opportunities that we didn't have, and I think the busier we are, we feel like that day we've done something for the day. So I do feel like that person in the Al Hamdulillah doesn't feel to me honestly but it's flying by in trying to do as much as we can
we play in my Allah please pericana time and allow our Afeni be calm, be as nice and steady as it was growing up. I mean, so yeah, that's the one aspect and then also went you know what, all the time you very busy mashallah with good stuff and Ramadan. So tell us a bit about your program. Subhan Allah, I think everybody's busy and I'm no exception. Alhamdulillah but in terms of the regular programs that I'm very excited about, is the fact that I've been involved with the girls, the group and they've given themselves the name or motto Quran
either hamdulillah which is synonymous with saying ALMA to Rasulullah sallallahu
of the Quran, and it's a unifying name, basically, representative of loss of half with girls coming from different schools. Arguably a lot of them coming from Germany, Coco but also from other schools Alhamdulillah we have in making the Rohingya community for a good couple of years and with COVID We had a bigger crowd Alhamdulillah because the machines were not available, especially to the females at the time that they were open. So we've been operating from Lansdowne
upstairs at the palace meat market, right? That's close. That's pretty close. Basically opposite Jabulani is around the corner from Humala right and Al Hamdulillah such a Mobarak place mashallah 10 will institute actually runs from the okay. Even the activities that we've been doing is the Amato Quran goals. The half goals we've been making that all we had hamdulillah every evening, this evening we recited in 19 and 20. And then on a Thursday, Friday and Saturday evening, we've also been making the AMA line Rocheleau since the beginning of Ramadan, Thursday, Friday and Saturday we will be doing to reduce to reduce to use and it's so exciting because we make the ROI hamdulillah
and we finish around about I would say half past nine or so now we finishing slightly earlier because we are reducing our quota to one use. But it's so nice because it's not like everybody just disperses at the end.
The ladies actually like to throw something delicate that's the highlight just throw something down to the ground and put some tees some ladies with designated teammate coffee and coffee also going under and there's no coffee
but I think I should tell him I should put it in order for coffee. And then we have like what was the but it's not really but it was just that everybody's the and it was eating the or whatever eatables are available and chat
Seeing and speaking and just catching up and the girls feel the love and the camaraderie from the aunties and the ladies. And the new Eve is leaving after that leaves about before 10 o'clock Alhamdulillah OPERS nine to 10 and the new Eva staying the most of the high field goals and those who are standing Fukuyama Lael Alhamdulillah, we will stand from Augustine till around about 10 or 12 o'clock some of the 12 but it's so exciting because we do two Jews, so one Jews, student texts and other Jews and other student texts. Then in like four four rock I decide, you know, the entire US to rock art, go to quarter the other to rock art go to go down in the juices, Dan, Mashallah.
It's such a beautiful opportunity. And the mothers and the supporters just love it. And I'm really proud of the goals to be on the second imagine young they are probably these, these youngsters about 1314, maybe slightly younger, up until about in the early 20s wanted to recently got married, but they are the man. And I look at them. And I think about my days of health and the opportunities. You know, the limited opportunities that we had, because it was so few females at the time. 96 and diseases make you feel old. I'm just asking because it makes me feel old. When I think like, Oh, when I was studying first year, we didn't have the NASA thinking I said I'm I'm speaking like that.
So I'm telling you. So besides that, did you latch on being old and feel the feelings they have, we also have Naseeha of the robbery. So I am basically the default Nazi listen. And then we have guest speakers. But if there is no key speaker, I'm giving Naziha. And if they can make it I am right. But to date, every guest speaker that just come, I don't actually know who's coming, right. But the minute he introduced him, we don't know anything, then I look at the guest speaker and then I introduce him. If the whole by and
large, I know these people, it's because I'm old. So I know the background of each of these people Subhanallah we're gonna do a long life is a means to an end all those who are doing good in the community. I mean, this is it's really nice to hear that our sisters have these types of programs article again, when I was studying, you know, for a second year that the sisters always used to struggle and they used to make their own little programs. And it used to always be you know, still fledgling programs, a few people come and so on. But it's really great.
It's a lot if I listened to the program, it's a lot but then I also think that you know what, it may be a lot for me, but for a happy law, you know, people who are studying the Quran, they are going to be performing tarawih anyways, Ramadan is really a time for half a half and half ago to really reap the fruits of what they sow, isn't it? And I mean, they don't really feel like it's a burden or like it's taking much of the time. Subhanallah is very interesting. You say it more than that. It's a time for a half hour and a half hour because the reality is that some people possibly find it strange Why are we having a female's only Tarot we have, but I can tell you growing up, even from
the days of Shafi, so politis, myself and Marlene Murad, DM me testing dodging, we used to do our own Tarot from time to time series as fledgling projects, it just started in it, you know, Dwayne down so the reality was that we found especially in my capacity, I was a teacher for many years as principal and I've always been involved in that field and Hamdulillah I found that with the with the males, mashallah when they graduate from the institute's they always have the annual opportunity to revisit your reading your Quran during the year but that is the time where you really like buckle down in and make sure that you're currently so on that level. And for the females I found that that
opportunity was lacking. So in terms of just Maharaja or revision of the Quran, this is one of the objectives of humatrope Quran but it's also a second very important objective. And that is something which we tried to cultivate during the year and focus on more in the month of Ramadan and that is just the togetherness of the hive girls and togetherness of the hive it goes irrespective of what school they come from, because at the end of the day, we don't want females or students to just be harfield We want them to be a holistic student. It's one thing to you know have the HELOC of the Quran beautiful no have the guidance of of some senior teachers people have gone on and studied a
bit further to you know, give them advice and to to to have some kind of a hand and a mentorship over them and that is really a hamlet something which we are trying to achieve with micro Quran and Ramadan of course being an impetus for that Alhamdulillah now let's excellent Masha Allah. So this takes place I'm gonna ask you to send me the details. I can put it up on screen for our sisters who are perhaps interested or looking for something of the sort but now I
If you want to take a step back from the high tech stuff, right, because, you know, the there are so many of us developing our own wife Subhanallah raising a child, often, often in our communities, women are the home executives, often they that plus they're working full time jobs. Ramadan comes around, and we all have these high aspirations. And lately I also find that, you know, we've all kind of stepped up the game as far as Islam is concerned. So you don't just come with your, with your, you know, I'm just going to grab a quick quick, it's like, where's the bistro going to go to and we're going to read three edges and all of these things. And then there's this person's own
personal hypermobile Quran. But one challenge that I find particularly
moving, you know, when it comes to our sisters is that they they have that, that we have Mills, you know, those aspirations, but then they also have these incredible duties at home that they fulfill so beautifully. In many homes, our sisters take almost sole responsibility of the Buddha and the silver tables, right. And I want to actually ask about witnesses the finds herself in such a position where she would love to undertake all of these projects. She would love to join you guys. But she just can't like she's raising her kids and so on. And I mean, she's going to work also. What What, are they falling short? No, because I think a lot of sisters feel that way. They feel like
they're not doing enough and all they need to do like Shankar Acharya and all these people. So what what do you have to say to them? Here's Subhanallah this an ayah that I love to mention when these kinds of situations are presented, and that is for Takala, Mustapha to Subhanallah mistranslated to Sir, yes,
Inshallah, but taco llama, south, Artem. And it means have Taqwa of Allah subhanaw taala, as much as you are able, within your capacity within your capacity. And, you know, to complement that the problem we see is the support and I am and then Mariela, you Dragoo Kulu loutraki julu, let you know that which cannot be completely achieved, the essence and the main components, primary components, the most important parts of it shouldn't be completely left out. Absolutely, we hear that and I hear that there's a female in the community all the time, the one to do things, but they are not able to do certain things. So we also have to be kind to ourselves, and to realize that, that I Ballard, we
are performing in our homes, and those duties rather, we are performing in our homes, that in itself is a form of arriba. And it's an amazing form of very bad, let's say, an amazing form of very bad, it is something which is part and parcel of bolding the building blocks of society. And
coming to mind, with Gollum I always say they say, a near to toggleable either good or bad. That's Hala with an intention. And intention has the power to change a habit or to transform a habit into an activity better. So you're doing those things anyway. But how are you doing it? Are you doing it with the intention of actually I have to do this anyway, I have to prepare the book, I have to do this, I have to, you know, run to the shop, I have to see to the child, I have to do everything and then he just nicely goes to the masjid oh, we're having that attitude and feeling resentful. Or are we perhaps really looking at what we are doing and doing what the good intention is. And he's saying
Subhanallah heard that if I have a good intention, inshallah Makinia instead of just for me, doing it as a form of habit, and it's my duty and it's my task and responsibility, I'm going to say that I'm doing this and preparing the food insha Allah so that my husband and my child can eat well and insha Allah that my husband can have the energy to connect our OB insha Allah and I will be part and parcel Inshallah, of that because I am assisting him in that very watercolor, you know, just having a different perspective and that is to assist each other in beard watercolor and goodness and piety. And that is just from a perspective of our duties in the home. But also just generally, he doesn't
mean if I can't go to thoroughly the deck cannot attain something of the Robbie Subhana Allah I am for example, in the kitchen, doing the dishes with the intention insha Allah of again, it's not my duty but Allah subhanaw taala to do any dishes, absolutely not one dish. Absolutely what I'm doing this for the sake of the family for the sake of the harmonious relationship, to continue to be insha Allah
ugly bastard government which other shall be that Sakina the tranquility and say that sense of peace and calm of each other and to be settlements each other. If we do that, if we do it with that intention, so really we're getting rewardingly busy doing those, that thing which we are going to do anywhere in the kitchen, and we put the radio on to the Quran, yes, you'd want to be reciting the Quran, but you're not able to do it at that particular moment. It's also an ability to listen to the Quran. Absolutely. If you, for example, done Dharavi he's done put on something maybe there's a translation in the Quran or, or the seed portion of the Quran. There's many things we can do
Alhamdulillah today, it doesn't mean if we can't do that thing that we aspire to, that there aren't other alternatives that we can do. Beautiful. I want to I want to come back to this, what you just mentioned about the things that you can do, because that's a big question, especially around you know, when it comes to time for hate and things like that, then you know, I see our sisters feeling like left out, because they My heart is on pause, or I really can't go to that all week. Now I still got to make Salah also. And so before we get into that, I just want to also sort of identify the fact that Ramadan, as much as you know, kind of Rasulullah saw some Yeah, just the heat of Ramadan
mileage, they do feel it used to strive already in Ramadan in a way that you wouldn't, outside of Ramadan. But this also, this also, you know, knowing what is what is that striving, striving is fasting, fasting is thriving, playing something at night is thriving. Even if we don't manage to do the full 20 reading Psalm Quran is thriving, because you're doing something that you otherwise would not have done, but you're doing it because it's Ramadan, and you want to close behind it, that is blessings. So, I think number one, I also I also like to reiterate the message that says they should not see themselves as not doing it. But if I say that correctly, they should see themselves as being
part of a badass. But then I also want to say to the males, this is very important.
The brothers, you know, we shouldn't have an expectation that that's your duty, especially if you're in the Shafi mother because technically, it's not that you don't want to get into the thick of it, yes, but don't ever take your wife or your mother or your daughters for granted in that they just supposed to be making some more says and frying pancakes and so on for bukata. And for you, they are actually sacrificing of their own time and doing something that is a form of sadaqa for their family. So I'm not discouraging it. But I'm also saying show a bit of appreciation. And try your utmost you know to make things easier for your family.
Some ways that I can think of immediately, which is I think worked Alhamdulillah as far as miles household is concerned, and why and don't expect stuff all the time. And you don't have to have cookies every night, right now on number two. Don't expect that only your wife or only your mother or your daughter has to make either you can also help Okay, or you can also go out in your hard earned cash that you're always bragging about to your family. Take some of that and actually make it easy for them if you can afford to do so of course, but try to stay stick to the basics the minimum because Ramadan is not a month about eating. It's a month about taqwa and Quran and a bad eating
should be like a by the way thing Allah Allah Al Hamdulillah we also don't want to on the night of optibike pasa discourage people from from enjoying themselves hamdulillah So in that spirit right what are the Ramadan experiences that you've come across of women now how do they those who actually manage what what type of experiences have they have they shared with you about Ramadan and yourself as well you know you also make sacrifices.
Melinda before get to that question and I just some clarification the but I just want to say as you spoke for the Mel's, I'd love to speak to the females just one quick point. And that is you know the cookies and the pancakes and everything. I can say one thing in terms of speaking to ladies they are very very happy to do all of that for the family. They are very happy to do that. They're happy to be in service of for the family that is that was behind Dallas created a woman. I think the only thing that they really want and desire from the the spouses is just gratitude alone depreciation save that thing is the even if there's nothing else that really gives them that strength and the
desire to continue to show show was just madness. On behalf of the it's excellent. You know, I'm always easy to be living in this PC age. So I don't I don't dare to speak on behalf of the females and say things like what you just said now but when it comes from a lady, that your perspective, you know, it must be respected as such. The moment the male may say something like that in the majority of
Ladies, I'm not speaking for the nominees but that's the general feeling that I receive when I speak to ladies. All they really want is that appreciation now Alhamdulillah Molina in terms of the experiences of ladies talking about experiences of ladies who are able to go to Toronto, yes, yes. How do they manage and what do they gain out of it? I can tell you mashallah that they have an amazing experience for sure. And hamdulillah Look, obviously the masjid Alhamdulillah go to the masjid that that also takes place in terms of the females and then the I can speak from my side in terms of where I've been making religiously and that is at the 10 really Institute with the Amato
Quran girls. What's really beautiful about that gathering Molina is it's not a masjid. Now. So the ladies come and they stand for taraweeh and for those who are not able to stand with that time of the month, they still attend and they sit at the back
and beautiful listen to the Quran Alhamdulillah and they just they in the gathering and they just listening to the goals and in the listening to the Nasi Hi insha Allah. And now the thing even the last thing that's coming up Alhamdulillah whether they are going to be attending or we were just sitting and listening to the Quran, we also began going to run a book Inshallah, okay, I'll be doing a book Ishaku Quran it's a poem in sha Allah about Salah in encouraging those to make Salah so those are the kinds of things that the ladies I was hesitant to do it because my plate was quite full and when I just mentioned that they like said no Malama you must do it the ladies are really really
Subhanallah hungry for to do something extra in the month of Ramadan I can't help but think of your of your beloved mother Leia haha and she you know since those years she did this exact thing we she gave guidance in light to the women of our community and it's great to see that you following in the footsteps all increase you and grant I place in Jana.
Both are pleasant. I mean, are you saying your father's or himolla mother was the one who was more out in the community but nobody really knows much that my mother before she taught who is strictly listen with my father yes Alan was the one who used to talk a lot but he was always a student of different Allah Masha Hanif was in the Caribbean.
So she always check her work with him. But she was more the public purse arrived at G IG they normally say Behind every successful man is you know, these above or women but in this case or handle. I also I just wanted to ask again that question. So
method and a woman comes and she she has a regular lifestyle, perhaps she's working perhaps she's a home executive, etc.
Now, they certain times in the month we they can't do certain things, right? I've seen many questions of this nature. And people answered it in different ways. I'm very keen on hearing what's your take? I mean, you've also mentioned now that at your program, women come and they sit and they listen, it's not the Masjid. But what's your take on
the best way that a lady could spend that time? She does want to do it by that she doesn't want to see the month of Ramadan going by Subhanallah some sisters say they don't they're not able to fast for like 234 Ramadan's in a row because mashallah, they've been busy with pro steroid procreation, so they're making the Omega strong
motion now they find themselves in that state, what what advice do you give them Subhanallah so these are the questions that come to me from time to time. And the one thing that is common among all women, is the fact that they feel that I'm doing enough and they feel like they've been good Muslims and they've been good means and they're just not, they're not really meeting, you know, the requirements, they have put for themselves in the month of Ramadan. So, I say particularly to those women who are unable to force whether it be from Mises or having had a baby, etc, or whatever the case might be, particularly with regards to means is and this is this is the common
time where we are simply not able to recite, able to do force. And I tell them Subhanallah, you beating yourself up so much about the fact that you cannot force and you focusing on the fact that you cannot force but you losing sight of the fact that in every field book, we will speak about, you know, those who cannot force or didn't say yeah, who more or less high yield, for example, it is haram upon her a woman who's has a high yield to force in the month of Ramadan. But we must take a step back and remember what does it mean when this is haram? It means that if I do that thing, I'm going to be punished. And if I don't do that thing,
because of obedience to Allah subhanaw taala I'm going to be rewarded hygiene hygiene. I
Never, ever ever thought of it in that way. And I mean, I've been I've read it. I've taught it that I've never actually thought about that. You see, that's why I said I want to ask a female's perspective on this. All the women ask you many questions, so then your brain has to work Subhanallah they so passionate about the deen that you need to allay the fears. So this is the thing and I tell them things like you know Allah subhanaw taala says in the Quran, yeah, you already know how to Allah how to Rasool O believers, obey Allah and obey His messenger. So by you know, by you wanting to force but knowing that you cannot fast even though your heart is breaking too fast, do
not force out of obedience to Allah subhanaw taala. Now, at that point when you submit the newer Muslim because Islam Muslim means you submit. So that is in itself a form of very bad because we do not be
disobeying Allah subhanaw taala and opening yourself up for punishment if you just went to Rite Aid and fasted, so, but you're not fasting with the intention of obeying Allah.
Give yourself some credit. So you're getting your word for that as well. Inshallah, IG IG, iG. Okay, so that is a very beautiful perspective, that never ever occurred to me that you're not actually being deprived. You're fulfilling anybody from a different perspective? Shall so okay, that's level one, right? That's a paradigm shift. I think for many people to first accept that, you know, this is the condition that Allah subhanho data selected you for and are selected for you and you are abiding the by play. And then
what else can we do?
You know, if you want I can tell you quickly that we've got some comments. Yes, the Russia and misperceived Bismillah they're raising energy during the next Imam Shafi I mean, and we've got since the Tasneem can saying Masha Allah beautiful topic, moms often feel depleted and not being able to reach the goals. However,
something I can feed myself with is remembering the reward of feeding the fasting person. And in the end, we feed whole families. May Allah reward all of those striving moms women greatly and accept all of our efforts? I mean, I mean, I mean,
just to continue on that vein, I think
we understand the concerns of the ladies in particular when they're not able to force but we need to also look at the bigger picture. And that is that fasting has been instituted and it is a it's something which is obligated upon us by Allah subhanaw taala to facilitate the video objective of Austin, and that is La La Quinta tacos and that is to attain piety. So fasting is one of the means that Allah subhanaw taala is in the month of Ramadan and the very objective rather forcing to attain piety. So if you're not able to force for that particular reason, that doesn't mean that we should completely lose sight of the objective of fasting and try to aspire to that even while we are not
able to force mashallah Han Allah. So what is Taco? A taco is many things, one of my favorites, and I'm sure you know more than one of the my favorite definitions of fasting is what Ali Rhodiola says about fasting and it says, it is a whole phenomenal journey. You know, fearing Allah subhanaw taala in a healthy manner, when I'm a little bit Tenzin and to implement the laws of Allah subhanaw taala Weill Cornell Carnera to be locally and to be content with a little while is Dr. Deadly O'Meara Hill and also to be perpetually prepared for the day of departure, to leave this dunya so while you're not able to force to focus on those kind of points, what what am I doing in terms of creating a
healthy respect of Allah subhanaw taala when you say, fear of Allah wouldn't mean the fear that you have for a lion, dog, right, the reverence that you have Allah subhanaw taala that reverence and respect that to lead you not to,
to overstep the boundaries of Allah subhana that being one of the objectives of fasting, while I'm not able to force what can I do in my life to work towards that Subhanallah Tenzin you know, we we live in and that is to implement the laws of Allah Subhana Allah or other people meet the book of Allah and live by.
So So what can we do in terms of that? So hang on, we're looking at the many ratios and stories of illustrious predeceases speaks about how they used to memorize an iron they wouldn't continue to memorize the next until they implemented that either. So why come to be even unable to fast for example, look it in I am looking at the meaning of that. You know, Allah subhanaw taala says in the Quran, you know,
be kind to each other be good do period
It'll be good your neighbors excetera. What can I do in terms of implementing that? Even if I can mostly that in the days that I'm not making Sona Subhanallah, I have fulfilled one of the objectives of fasting. So fasting was supposed to lead me to that, but if I'm not able to fast, okay, so try to implement that Subhanallah that's beautiful. One cannot be locally and that is to be satisfied with a logo.
In our lives, even if we have a lot of wealth, there's always something that we want more. So during that time, we am unable to get to have what I want to just a force, what do I need to make solid with and not only a solid with but have contentment and conviction and complete peace of mind, a hunger that is enough for me. And then the last and probably the most heavy and important, and that is to be perpetually prepared for the day of departure.
You know, while I'm not fasting environment able to do that, how can I instill in myself that conviction that at any time if Allah subhanaw taala wants to take me I will be content, I will be satisfied with also behind the garlis decree. So it speaks about Arcada even in that in that line, and how we this many things we can do Milena to get us to that level besides fasting, or we can sign ourselves up for the cause with it with a teacher. We can, you know, read a book in terms of fasting the virtues of piety, we can ponder and reflect upon it. We can read the translation of the Quran we can read some Tafseer of the Quran. We can read Hadith, there's so many things we can do. I'm not
discounting the fact that you want to force we want to force every human goes through that. Right but also when Rasulullah sallallahu says why should they are not crying when they were on hygine Austin
she was supposed to make power she's supposed to off and you asked the FST did you pick a meaning that that word meaning ever become a new means is higher? And she said yes. And Rasulullah sallallahu said that this is this is che this is something that about cateva Hula, hula Allah Banette yet it's something which Allah subhanaw taala is written and prescribed upon the daughters of either meaning is something which Allah is decreed for us. So as much as anything, this is one of the last points I want to make. As much as we want to do that thing. You must remember that this is something which Allah has decreed. And by us being sad and heartbroken that is a human reaction, but
in coupling it with contentment and satisfaction for Allah subhanaw taala That in itself is very bad because we are satisfied with Allah subhanaw taala is degree versus
being unhappy with Allah subhanaw taala so this would obviously not be not be a positive reaction from our side. ajeeb mashallah, that's really inspirational. I mean, I don't experience those things but I feel personally as well you know, we we sometimes limit the pathways to Allah subhanaw taala like we don't we don't think of Khasra to to kill hive anymore. Now he's got a whole chapter on that modernize it. I must demonstrate something you must have. So yeah, the abundance of pathways to goodness. In fact, that's one interpretation, even hudgell Ellis Kalani one of the interpretations he has of the doors of Jana is opening Ramadan and the dosa Johanna close one of the interpretations
is that it's not literal, but the pathways to Jana are so many of all the pathways to jahannam have been restricted. Because I mean, it's Ramadan, every good thing is happening.
And Allah Yeah, and I also think that in every good thing you do, it's multi fold. So
it's like so it's like everything is on a discount. It's like Black Friday, every day for a month.
I think also, one of the the things that I mentioned last year in a podcast was that so many people are so keen and this is a great role way to have a great enthusiasm to have like what can I do to make this Ramadan the most? It's a very good Rockabye to have. But I think based on the Annette Hadith codici, in which Allah Subhana Allah says Maya Takara boo Ilya appdb che in Ellerbee mafia rato a slave doesn't draw close to me with anything more than what I Allah have made compulsory upon that servant and then be now after you know then with extra things that come second
so I was thinking like, instead of looking at what more can I do, I think a very good point to start is what can I not do? You know, what can I What can I save myself from so hear me out? Yeah, I don't want
HPC but you go and go to all AMA and if I stay away from the huddle a or because sometimes people don't consider, you know, that series that I'm watching, or that movie that I'm watching, or that music that I'm listening to, I mean, look, we don't want to get into the nitty gritty of all of that. That's not the purpose of the discussion. But at the end of the day, you know, the same code is in there that you're not supposed to be and especially not in Ramadan. So if you just manage to get back on that, even if you remain neutral and you don't like have any extra I bad that to the point where you feel like oh, this is a you know, solid Ramadan, I still think that one would
benefit tremendously. And sometimes, you know, for non scholars, non students of Deen, who are not necessarily accustomed to environments we TV is is sort of a taboo or a music is sort of a taboo we know TV in Ramadan no CDs in Ramadan no movies in the Ramadan no music in the Ramadan City get a person you know what I mean? Like I think in in many households it's such a normal accepted thing that people don't quite perceive the harms they have outside of Ramadan and inside of Ramadan is like the same right? I mean, what's the harm in in that and you could argue you know about the details and what they're watching and so on. But I honestly believe that if somebody is worried
about what they're doing in Ramadan cut back on the on the stuff that you're not supposed to be doing. That's a very interesting perspective Malina let's actually like in terms of practically martial law, that's that's so true. And I'm just thinking of what am I say about this that's completely in line with what you're saying? And in terms of this month being the month of tequila, tycoon and one of the things that people focus a lot on in this month is deskah, no purification of my daughter, Masha, masha Allah Allah granted
she makes my test gear to survive while I'm sure every every every child does that for the business Mashallah. But you know, Marlena speaking about that in a practical manner and then coming back to the month being a month of Tascam Subhanallah and then what you mentioned about cutting out the haram for you focusing on the excellent you can't do what what is actually in your ability. Now Allah man say this thing in Tanzania, the holy Kabbalah the holy, that means, you know, read you saw a reduce of of vices before imbuing yourself with praiseworthy
can be a ye first stopping worry. So behind Allah Subhanallah SubhanAllah 100% So, what that means basically is before you start imbuing yourself with extra qualities of goodness which is great and praiseworthy, but how is that going to gel with useful having all these negative qualities jealousy anger, hatred, malice, you know, going out of your way to be ugly to people but then you want to do extra good the extra good is good but remember that's extra the Soccer Soccer absolutely the hydrometer doing all the wrong doing It's haram that's that's blameworthy you opening yourself to sin raises the good that you doing X rays only opening yourself to extra reward now one of my
teachers one of my teachers had a very nice example he said that your sins is like the holes that you punch into the bag and then the bag gets filled with all this hate with let's say with this
but all that is just escaping because your sins just draining out like you patching Quran by jankura Now you go sit in your watch that series in your mind is just a series it's not pornography it's not this it's not that but the some imagery in the the some language in the the some storyline you're not supposed to be indulging in now you you punch a hole in your bag Okay, now the next morning you wake up you feel like
I don't feel close to Allah anymore and you wonder what happened to the Jews that you butcher the night before? I think it's a very it's a very important point for men and women alike you know to take Ramadan as a time to cut back city TV if you know plug it out. The way a millennial exactly what you're saying it doesn't even mean doesn't necessarily have to be that series as any haram in it. It's just that in its essence is a distraction. Yes. So if you watch so much of it, you don't actually realize that you you actually auditing your heart to heart is actually becoming dead inside he doesn't realize it because it's a perpetual state. But if this month of Ramadan, you either cut
back or you just like completely go go cook go cold turkey and often Ramadan. You actually did it religiously for 30 days. They say that it takes 21 days to form a habit. Whether you are going to be you know, having a high yield or not during that time, you know, doesn't mean that you are going to fall back to those guns you can steal from other good, exactly. So off
to 30 days it's really difficult to switch on this series and start watching it and feel good about yourself. Yes, at the beginning you're gonna feel amazing as we go through that feel bad now we push ourselves to feel bad I'm gonna do it anyway until you start feeling good again and so you start feeling less bad and less bad. And then to the point where it's just like it's normal and that is why Ramadan comes every year Subhan Allah did try to ask renewing those intentions renewing in sha Allah all those those efforts but obviously with the hope that this Ramadan we're going to continue with that.
During the Allah Subhana Allah is so mercy for it's it's just hard to describe it's hard to perceive we blender and blender and blender. And it was so hard to to know that look at that, that that is it. The very nature of doba is not like a one stop shop. It's perpetual you know you're always gonna have to turn back to Allah and when you look at every year we say you know this Ramadan I'm going to make a difference I'm going to make a change. I'm gonna you know, so for for that women those women who have aspirations to leave Ramadan with something you know, they hope nobody's thinking that they're going to be only I just from one Ramadan oh my god, I can't even it's possible it's possible
teach me a secret
but they want to walk away with something you never see.
No, no go with something. And what how should one approach that how do you how do you as a woman, I mean, I suppose it's general as well but as a woman, what type of growth should women sort of expect and aspire to in Ramadan? Bearing in mind that some ladies again they Yeah, Imam Shafi Do you have them so betcha in they also like oh I'm not butchering two times in ELI I'm such a bad person. So managing expectations with all how what's a manageable so the aspiration to say okay, after Ramadan you can achieve something like this within or after Ramadan do to keep to keep Yeah, it's Malena it and this discussion that we had I think
we should aim for realistic your expectations. And every person knows themselves you know, they'll be doing it also Rasulullah sallallahu wasallam about those things that he needs to do if he does the five pillars well as Alicia and I don't add anything else to that and the whole Jana I'm again to intergeneric Subhanallah so I think the lesson in that for us and just generally is maybe don't focus on lofty aspirations first look at our lives now and see we may fully showed in terms of alpha ROI in terms of what I need to do mmm my four five Salawat religiously you know, am I off to the fire Salawat fasting comes once a year. Okay, hygiene once a year fine. beyond that in terms of my
interactions, am I being good to my parents? Am I good being good to my neighbors Am I being a decent human being am I doing what is followed upon me just that if I'm not if something is lacking the then let us first fix that sort of thing I share sometimes obviously paying for 5g or not worrying about acid because I'm at work in Russia home lead my resolution for Ramadan be that often Ramadan I will not miss a final Salah Adji and then beyond that make up for the salah that you must and if all of the royalties in place all of the royalties in place then exactly like you said Malena instead of wanting to do thin good things focus on one or two and let it continue for the year yeah
yes and then come the next Ramadan you add something else no and something else but the basics are the ya know that that's wonderful advice really I think a lot of these a lot of height happening in the world as far as what Muslims are doing in our country I think we are so we supposed to dress in Cape Town as well. We've got so many programs and so many groups and everybody's got their own height happening but if you must try to do everything they can yeah Rob I don't think I don't think anybody would really be able to end it and to put so much pressure on yourself. We're saying that as mentioned Hadith EURion Lee you shed that Dino I don't Allah NFC Allah Allah who nobody can even
make the deen intense and difficult upon themselves. The dean is going to conquer you and so many people
are afflicted by West Vasa right we shaytaan uses your A Bader to make you feel inadequate and it's like you're doing a bad app but now is my will do right now is the spot on my arm let's not wait or it didn't didn't make didn't make the near right in you standing intact virtually haram for two hours alone. No, no, hello. Not wait, wait, start over again. So it's important
and to manage your expectations and that I think it's such a wonderful bit of advice to give you know is your basics in order you know you want to aim V but you didn't even fix the foundation down here. And men do this the same I think this is very general
Am I making my five sale as I tell people I gave a quick bow on this one's I say the only one thing the sahabi comes to the profitsystem and he says like the Dean has become vast, there's so much to do and so on. Just give me one thing to hold on to if I do that, you know, be saved. And then the profitsystem told him you know, never let your tank dry of the remembrance of Allah. And then I see you look at that now. Okay, now we ask what is the most the most perfect form of remembrance of Allah Salah. So if you focus on only salah, nothing else, like literally you still doing haram, you still, you know having to carry it with whatever business you're busy with. You're not covering your
hour properly. You're not, you know, sorting out your engagements between gender interactions. You're not so but you worried about your Salah every day five times a day. Fajr the harasser McRib Aisha and you focus on that to the point where you start doing it, then you do it on time, then you do it at the beginning of its time. When you do it with who then you learn what you're saying and what it means. That sila in nassarawa tenha, annual fascia you will learn that Salah is going to bring you right so if you if you if detrimental if the female by the Allah hoobie begin with what Allah began with men. Allah doesn't make our lives tougher as he doesn't make our lives difficult
for us. On the one hand, yes, Allah both the believers lives and the wealth in exchange for Jana. But what does that mean? What is already a new asked for you from you on a day to day basis? maxilla
mixolo And you know, Malina the fact that we can make that all we
some of us go every evening some of us go many evenings most evening some of us go some evenings, but most of us go for an evening with two Yes, so that in itself was the first night in the Tunisie with me.
So even that in itself was a listen to asset if I can make my five Salawat Ramadan but gotta go away and make another 20 rockhard from time to time then after Ramadan, I can definitely manage five Salawat today because Subhan Allah that is a listen. So just to mention now I just something that the thought of Marlena and that is speaking about those people who for whatever reason cannot force whether it is the woman or someone who's ill or breastfeeding whatever the case might be, you know the famous Hadith that we hear in Ramadan and if somebody makes you upset too angry, you must just say In Islam we they said verbally with in your in your heart, you said in Islam, and you know they
didn't look at that hadith why is that hadith so paramount in people's minds in the month of Ramadan, more so than outside of the month of Ramadan, we if somebody makes them angry, they'll just say what they want to say. Because in the soil in tying into Lala Katakolon that you may find it so that you might attain piety, because part of piety is restraining yourself from saying things which are ugly. So whether you are able to force or not force that is a major form of variability can also work on Russia And subhanAllah you know that as well as the fact that um, so that is in terms of your time. And then another thing that you're not able to do even as a married couple and that is to
have relations during the day and the one of the hadith of Rasulullah sallallahu, which is mentioned in Mahalia Melissa and prohibitions of the tongue of famous work, which is studied generally in the month of Ramadan, we Rasulullah sallallahu Sallam says, we ever predict or save God's two things, or two things that is his tongue and his private bots, I will guarantee for him Genja will generally be guaranteed for Subhanallah tie that into the month of Ramadan, that the MSA who even considers and counts the deeds of his tongue among his deeds will be saved on the day of Korea. Yeah, so Subhanallah just looking at you can't force but that's such a major part of our deen our tongue that
the head that that are forcing is tied to Assange in the saw him if somebody Subhanallah some somebody makes us angry. self restraint is definitely so that's something that we can you know, really also focus on and work on and that is something which we spoke about earlier. Instead of focusing on the extra things, the basic things is not to be ugly to people not to backbite not to salon, do not to gossip, so rid ourselves of the vices and then bolt I have to go into you into slander and gossip I have to go the try to posture from social media also, you know, like, like really, if
you on social media, that's the thing I was about
unless you know you're doing something good, like you posting something good or you reading something good. But if you're going through that infinity pool with the thumbs getting exercise, and you're just swiping, swiping, swiping you better off just doing nothing go sleep rather, you don't have anything good to do and you feel like doing something bad, rather good sleep. So I think that, that in the Hadith, it says, Isn't it that no normal slot in my bed
forcing person is bad? Now. I want to ask the viewers if you do have any questions for Shakalaka, you have a few minutes in which to ask inshallah we are going to be closing of soon. And in the meantime, I would like to ask with regards to da I'm very passionate about people making da da Mahal. i By that I mean we should all be passionate about da it is the essence of worship. I find that, in my experience is purely anecdotal, I find that women are often
moved when I when I make a dua in English that they can relate to.
And I'm not saying anything special, because it's basically what we asked for in Arabic, but I say it in English so that people can understand that we actually having a conversation with Allah. Right? It's not, it's not like some magic dust that we you know, abracadabra, or what's this reporter who does that? We think it's actually speaking to Allah. How, in your experience, how do you how do you advise about how do you advise women to go about making dua How should they see do so that they can relate to do more and in a more personal manner, so differently even in terms of Da
Subhanallah, as communication between yourself and Allah? So, whether you're making Salah again, because I think this is one of the points that is coming to the fore more and more or not, you know, there's something with the east, some of the East some common features, you could say, between salah or we endure it is some form of communication with Allah Subhan. So, in terms of dua,
I think we observe first the etiquette of dua because we are essentially besieging Allah Subhan darlin imploring us Allah subhanaw taala if something so like we just sit down and we start making dua to us all the things shopping list, so Han Allah said, like you want something from your, your neighbor and just like knock on the door, like you know, I need you I need eggs and I need sugar and I need you know, I need your Can I use your microwave, you first say, you know, how are you? Nice to see you so you do this today and I hope you well you know, what can I can send you this some kind of intro. So we first have an intro was Allah subhanaw taala we praise Allah subhanaw taala because
Allah subhanaw taala call quote Allah by the name that we are imploring Him for Yahweh, Herb, yam and Nan Yaffa. You know also Allah subhanaw taala by His names to bestow upon us that which we need so, and then also in terms of just the sitting and this the seating, the seating rather, of the drive. Also the ladies whether you are able or not
the last portion of the evening, before
fudges Allah, you know, being awake that time asked Allah Subhana Allah, that the time Allah subhanaw taala does sins and Allah is mercy, the sins that Allah wants to give in Allah Subhana Allah wants to respond. So also taking opportunities, taking opportunity, and rather taking advantage of those those times, I think, and then also to have positive expectation of Allah subhanaw taala and a positive opinion of Allah subhanaw taala that whatever you ask, it will come to fruition because that's one of the criteria of dua being accepted that the
rules or laws continue to be accepted as long as the servant doesn't ask, When will be accepted. They don't have doubt in that.
And then I love the poem of Imam Shafi regarding to it sums up the importance of dying the power of Darius and I love quoting the CC's that has the OB dua with his daddy. When I did the DB mas on there I do I see him will Leila. Wallach in Lucha Emma doon will Emma.
So Hanalei says do you mock analytical dua whilst you do not know the true power of DA, the Edward Knight
doesn't miss its target, but it has a distance to travel, but even distance will surely come to an end. So
you know, to have to make that to hire but don't expect the DA to materialize today or tomorrow. I believe that you know, making the DUA that the Doha will be accepted and will be materialized in a time that is perfect but Allah Subhana Allah Subhana Allah I
I think that's so profound I would I want to latch on to it. We are doing the story of Nabi Brahim and etc, etc. So, in the story we come across the incident whenever Abraham moves to
Brighton mark this but on his way passes through Mr. And these tyrannical king, this king, he takes the women that he finds fanciful and he just takes it for himself. If they're married, he kills their husbands. So now Abraham says Now Sarah is actually my sister. And what do you mean if I was like she's my sustain Islam, okay. But the point that I wanted to get to was that when the king took Sarah had assets, Islam, and they will firstly run they say she was a paragon of beauty. So it takes her and he wants to now assault and he approaches her and she just turns to align she makes dua Subhanallah and he gets a seizure, he can move
and then he says, you know, play to low delete me go and then she plays to Allah and Allah letting go, and then he does it again in Mexico again, and he gets a seizure. And she makes a letting go how many times in a row?
Look at the relationship she has with Allah Subhana Allah. Firstly, it's astounding that they call it a paragon of beauty, but she's also a person of taqwa, vn it's astounding that she plays to align instantly. In our response to the natal people. Do you also realize that she was struggling to give birth to to have a child do you realize that she was under she was undergoing tremendous pressure. We she wanted so much to have a child Allah didn't want it to you she has the power, the power to make dua, Allah Granta, but Allah doesn't just grind as she sees fit. Allah Granta aS II sees fit. So it doesn't mean that because Allah is not responding to your door, or whatever serious, sincere,
earnest to it, that you have anything spinal, it's just not. Don't think that you know, Allah has abandon you, because it's just that he knows that right now, that particular thing, he knows better when ended up in Milan. And I think like, I don't know, if we just go all over the place. Alhamdulillah but just speaking about that, you know, one of the criteria that you that I live by and I think every Muslim loves by but it really gives you that calmness of spirit and just to be at ease in every Fe he's given me didn't mean to say no more than that amazing is the feel of a believer Amarula while that all is a phase or good, whether he finds himself in you know ease or
difficulty this either opportunity for giving gratitude thankfulness or for for being after for having sober you know, between two patients, but irrespective all of that is something which is good for him, but we make dua, we make dua, but while that is happening with it something you know, that is bringing about us being thankful or being patient while that is happening, we must believe that it is good for us. And as long as we believe that it is good for us and we make dua for for for for ease insha Allah then Allah subhanaw taala will grant us what is what is perfect by him and we must trust in His plan. I mean, can I ask before I get your closing comments if I can just ask you if
people want to reach out and they want to know more about the programs is the any contact information that we could share? Remember this is going to go online and social media so if it's a number one email address or website, then that would be great. Give I'm just opening inshallah tickets I will give you the numbers of those who are in charge I'm going to give two numbers in short, okay. The one number is Sister of My Jacobs Okay, um, her number is 0797019090 That's again is 0797019090. And then also, her sister is also assisting her sisters isa Jacobs they are doing more so the admin the mashallah number is 082340 double 395 Okay, so I'm just going to add those
numbers onto the screen. Please do my contact if you're interested in the tarawih programs and the OMA humatrope
I'm really proud of them. I'm so proud of the martial law. I feel like they're all my children. And you know, having seen them coming from a leaf but
going to the first US five Jews in our standing foot are all we're fearless, committed to the Quran.
Having grown so much but maintaining the humility and the desire to pursue, you know, subhanAllah and the sciences and other fields but despite
Every every growth that they're experiencing the lives still being committed to the Quran, it's amazing to stoning Allah increase them and accept from them and granting overheid and Baraka. Any closing comments and social Musa Africa, I think just shook Ranger Zealand to tamale enough for having me on a. And I think what I'll end off with what I started, and that is for women specifically during the month of Ramadan, these times that we feel we could do more. And besides that, we feel like we should do more. But we should remember, we should be kind to ourselves. And we should have enough energy to first see to ourselves and in our family. And then beyond that, for
Takahama Satara to, I think have that as a mantra in your mind. So to say for Taco llama Satara to have Taqwa of Allah subhanaw taala as well as always asked us in the Quran in the month of Ramadan, but must Satara as much as you are able now. We know our duties, but we do it
not because we have to do it, but because we want to be part of the building blocks of society. And we want to have a a constructive Muslim society and community and we are very much the backbone of that as females and Allah subhanaw taala we must believe it all the orders for that. And we can only do what we can do so for Taco llama Satara to
have Taco as much as you can. And then remember my lady Roku Kulu loutra Could you know that which cannot be completely achieved Should not we shouldn't leave it out completely to what we can. So insha Allah because Allah subhanaw taala to keep us in force in the month of Ramadan and to allow us inshallah to still continue to reap the benefits and the fruits of Ramadan. And most importantly, do not be you know, a one month wonder, sha Allah try to take something beyond a month of Ramadan and I say that to myself. Firstly, inshallah instead of doing a lot of things in the month of Ramadan and then leaving Ramadan with the continuation of nothing, try to focus on what can I take out, I'm
gonna do this, I'm going to do two things one thing and I'm going to be consistent, right, a hydro llama, one called the base of these that which is consistent even if it's a little so the month of Ramadan is about working hard in earnest LEUs but also continuing with something of that along the year. Mashallah. Chaka Khan for joining us in studio it is an honor and privilege to have you. I'm sure as I have that the listeners the viewers have enjoyed it and if they can benefit that's more important. We pray and make the others Allah Allah grant you and all of our sisters, all the height and Baraka, in this month of Ramadan and beyond, and especially for the Hatfield knights who are
working so hard and tirelessly, but enjoying it at the same time and having the time of the lives pray Allah grant him all the hate and baraka and accept from all of us. Xochimilco Hara Alikum rahmatullah wa barakato.