Returning Back to Allah

Hasan Ali


Channel: Hasan Ali

File Size: 34.38MB

Episode Notes

This lecture was delivered at the Youth Tarbiyyah Conference 2014.

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hamdulillahi Rabbil alameen wa salatu salam ala nabina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi.

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Wa on your body.

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Yeah. Latina Manohla Tilikum, Luca mala

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me, friend Danica

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probably try to find a pool or

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a hot attorney,

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body, Lola a heart any

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body being for

00:01:06--> 00:01:07

me no fault

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of your own law who have sent either

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one law hobby rule be met

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by the respective brothers and sisters Assalamu alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

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My brothers and sisters just want to say a part to you first.

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And I want you to follow me through with this.

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And as I say this, just concentrate on the words that I'm actually saying

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what I'm actually saying and realize what it is that I'm trying to convey to yourself.

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So I didn't really realize

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that it would happen to me like this.

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I didn't realize that it would happen to me like this.

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And I didn't realize that it would be so sudden.

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And I didn't think it would be like this.

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And I didn't think that my dreams would be over so soon.

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And I didn't think that it was myself. That was the one to leave.

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And I just couldn't believe it. That's so sudden, so quick.

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At a time when I wasn't really prepared

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when I was in the time of wanting to enjoy the rest of whatever I wanted to do.

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And all of a sudden, it just took me

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by surprise.

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And I stood there

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with my heart in my mouth.

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And I looked into the eye.

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And as soon as it was on its way I knew the time had come.

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And when it came

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I woke up. I woke up.

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I the individual inside, woke up.

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And it wasn't

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it wasn't me anymore.

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My body froze.

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My whole hands, my feet.

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They were chilled.

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I felt

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like a fundable going through down my spine.

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And I just looked with mouth wide open.

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And I thought to myself, this is a

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and as I was thinking about that, I thought what is it that I can do?

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And as I froze there, and I knew that this thing had come straight through the wall

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and right at me

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and stood before me just a few yards.

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And I knew it couldn't be

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it couldn't be a joke.

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It was true.

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But what is it that I could do?

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And I wanted to scream

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but I couldn't.

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Because it was me. Not my body anymore. It was me.

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This body I realized was really not mine.

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And I was within it all this time.

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And I was the person controlling the body.

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And I knew that one day This had to happen. But I never knew that it would happen like this. And I wanted to scream, but that's what the body does. But I'm no longer the body.

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I am the person inside.

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I've been the person inside. And it all makes sense right now. And I look around at the other people who are in the room, as they're all looking at me, and towards me being so shocked. And I realized that all the people who are my own blood relatives, and the very people who, who I knew all my life,

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I didn't see

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more of their bodies than I saw themselves. For now, I looked and looked at every family member around me. And I saw that they too, have got bodies that are being leased to them,

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bodies that have been leased to them. And my body was also a lease. And the lease has now or is about to expire. And I realize that right now, if I say to Allah, Allah,

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I really, really, really am sorry, sorry, is too late. For the one who has seen parts of the afterlife, and the one who has been woken up by the arrival of death.

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That person has got no way of saying sorry to Allah anymore. For Toba is only accepted. Repentance is only accepted before one sees death itself. And as I stood in this room, and the pain took over my body,

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and I've always been a healthy person, I've always eaten my good foods or my nutritious foods. And I've always had my good vegetables and my you know, I've always stayed away from those things that will corrupt the body. And I've always done exercise, but death sees none of that.

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It's time when it's time, it's time. And I wish right now, I could get myself

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a few more moments. And I really want to do something.

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And as it starts to walk towards me,

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and I start to feel the shivers down my body. And my convulsions take place. And I start to shake my body shakes, and I'm about to drop onto the ground as a healthy individual, when the time has come. any excuse is a small excuse for God to take anybody's soul, which is the real self back to the real world. And I realized that this moment that is all fake around me.

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And the fake world around me disgusts me. And I look and I see my family members who are around me, and I see each and every one. And I only can feel sorry for them for what have they done. But that's not what takes over my mind. What takes over my mind in a flash is my entire life. And I look back. And I think to myself, what is it that happened to me? For I allowed the gifts of God, the very things Allah gave me as a bounty, and the comforts he put me into, and the wonderful moments I had. Those were the very things that made me move away from Allah. They should have brought me closer to Allah. But they took me away from Allah. And I look back and I think to myself, damn, what did I do?

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And I can see across, right across my life, and I see so many nights that I spent in playing games, on my console games, on my box and whatever I had a laughter of my friends. And I did enjoy those moments but done. Those moments are not going to help me right now. No, are those friends going to travel with me right now? No. Is any one of them

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To be with me right now. And if they were to see what I'm seeing, they would run as fast as a zebra from a lion for rottman qaswarah. And if I could do it right now, I would run as fast as I could. But I can't, I'm frozen. And this body is frozen. And the moment that I've seen this thing come towards me, I know it's game over. And I think back and I see the many moments that I spent on the couch, in front of the TV, and on the internet, and in my hand, the smartphone, and Dan the smartphone, damn the smartphone, damn the smartphone. But it was difficult for me to waste time always on the couch. But it was so easy for me to waste time, when I've got that thing in my pocket.

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And I carried it around. And all those texts that I sent, and the emails that I was with, that had nothing to do with my era, nothing to do with my afterlife, nothing to do with Allah and His Messenger, nothing to do with a reminder about who I really am. And my destiny on this earth. All of that, to me is like dust in the air. On a sunny day, when it's when the rays of the sun come through the window, and you see dust flying, and dancing in the Omi moments flash in front of me, like the dust in the rays of the sun, then nothing for me. And I look back and I think, wow, that moment I had when I first met her, and I saw her and her beauty took me and I thought I needed to be with

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her. And the moments I spent after that trawling through precious time to try and just get a glimpse of her to try and take a photo of her to try and speak to her. And then finally, after a long period, we did get together. But the days I spent with her those days without nikka. without marriage, today is me. In trial,

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I am to be summoned in front of the King of kings. I'm about to travel to a court, nobody can escape. I'm about to go in front of angels that took every single thing down. And now it makes sense. All the relatives I see on their shoulders. On the right shoulder is an angel. And the left shoulder is an angel. And as I grass my last moments, I see anything they are saying, and they're calling me by my name. And those angels are writing every act they're doing and everything they are saying. And I see my two own angels, wrapping up their books, for this is my last moment that I've got. And it makes sense to me right now that everything of this world that I've seen is nothing but

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will turn to

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dust, pure dusts as you take into the ground. that lovely, lovely room that I can see. And the hundreds of pounds that I've spent decorating this room, what decoration, dammit, I should have been while decorating, remembering a law. And it is only those things that I take with me of Allah and His messenger. And what they told me to do, that will be with me right now. And I regret the moments that I've spent arguing, arguing because I wanted to prove myself to be better. And I regret those moments that I spent trying to show or impress my friends. And I regret those moments that I spent on the earth. What I wanted to be seen by others, as someone who's got authority and clout. And all

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I did that because of this body.

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And then this body, because this body is not even mine. And I spent so much time of my life for this body.

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And all of that is going to come back to me right now and I'm thinking right now, what is it that's called to travel with me for my bank right now with the few good 1000s of pounds

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I put, it's not mine, it was never meant to be mine. And the clothes on my body, which I wore on my wardrobe in front of me, all of that is going to be taken by others after me, and death comes walking towards me, and it reaches to me.

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Who am I, I am the real person, I am the soul. I thought I had a soul, but I was wrong. I was the soul. And I had a body. And as it takes me, and I feel the coldness of my own body, and I come out of this body, and I see hundreds and hundreds of angels all around, and I see a complete different world. I long no longer see buildings, these buildings are there, but they mean nothing to me. What I see is I see actions of people, I see people, when they do good, it changes into a, a thing, which will see them in the afterlife, as I'm being lifted from my body. And I'm going and I'm being elevated towards another world, my real world, my real home, I say to myself, I forgot. I forgot the

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moment that the angels had brought me just yesterday, they came with me to my mother's room.

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My mother's womb. And I remember the moment so clearly, how could I forget when they took me from the station or all of the souls and they bought me into my mother's room, and into that little fetus of this body that I have now expired.

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I was blown into it by an angel. And I became like a, that fills the vacuum of a balloon. That's all I was in this body. I was that a I was that soul. And that was me. And I remember the moment I spent in the womb, and all I knew was a law. All I knew was a law. All I knew was Allah. And Allah fed me and allotted did give me a wonderful time in my mother's womb, no matter where my mother went, no matter how she was, whether she was standing or sitting or lying, or reclining. I was always perfectly fine in that room. And I should have realized that in itself was a miracle. How could I survive in there without actually having any oxygen of myself or without having any real food? It

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was all supplied to me right inside my body through my belly button. I was I was provided that and how much of a fool could I be that when I came on this earth, I first remember I cried, and I heard the event, I want to hit the event. It was just like yesterday, it was a last words. On Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar was said to me, I calm down, realizing that you know, everything is alright, I'm in this real world, this new world, this was a new world. For me. Everything was different. And I got so used to the world that I forgot my home. My real home, I forgot about it. I got used to the heat of this world, to the light of this world, I got used to the humans of this world, I got into

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the competition of this world, I started to have education, and a lot taught me. And as I grew up, Allah gave me strength. And that very strength today was the one that has been the greatest enemy of mine, from my own body strength, my intelligence, strength, my money, strength, my financial strength, all of it started to move me away from Allah. And this is it now. And as I'm elevated from the body, and as I go up, it all makes sense. Everything that the Prophet said,

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Everything they said was true. And now I leave the body. And as my body collapses onto the ground, they think that I just had a heart attack. But you guys that are listening, I'm telling you that a heart attack is only an excuse for God, he can burst a vein in your body, he can turn a cell around, he can make you stop breathing, he can break your spine at a at an instance of a second. And for my excuse, it wasn't harder, and some go because their cells die in their body. And others go because they have got tumors in their body. And others go because their lung has collapsed. And others go because the livers have failed them. But all of this is just excuse for God to take you back to the

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real world. And each and every one of us has to go but now I have to face my challenge and what is that?

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I've been just taken out of this body and my family full on to the body.

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And they check the pulse. And I think, what's the use of checking my pulse, I'm not even there. I'm not there. And they find no posts, and tears flow from their eyes. And they start to cry. My own brothers and sisters and parents and others around me, I was a young person. And I didn't realize you'd be so sudden, I thought I had another 3040 years of life. But I never knew that all of a sudden, just because of the rare problem in my body, which God put in my body that the heart suddenly collapse, and nobody saw it coming. And now I'm out of the body. And I'm being told to go back to the body from I will reach my destiny, I come back to my body. And now I'm inside, and all I

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hear is crying. And all I see is people coming to visit my dead body. And they take my body and I can still feel it, but I can't move it anymore. And they put my arms together to my sides. And they put a sheet over my body. And I can just I can see everything. They've got a sheet on my body. And it's all over my face. But I can see right through it. I can see through buildings, I can see through through ceilings, I can see through humans, because I'm a soul. And I was always a soul. And all death was a transformation of me going from one world to another. I never died. There's no such thing as death. I only transform from one world to another. And that's what death was a soul it was

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and now I breathe a different breathing.

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My body is not breathing, but my soul knows only Allah. Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah, just before I came to my mother's room, all I knew was Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah. And right now I'm a I'm a soul again, all I know is Allah, Allah, Allah. But guess what, right now those Alas, those La Ilaha laws, those Alhamdulillah those are La La Paz, they can't do anything. Because the angels have gone from my side. They don't write any more deeds for me, for I am now pronounced on the earth den. And in the skies alive. I have been revived and alive, but they think I'm dead. And as they put a cloth over my face, and they start to straighten my body, they take my clothes off. And they have me

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completely stripped down. And they've got a cloth, a warm body to hide my naked body. And then after that, I can only see people walking in, and crying, and crying and talking how I went. And they talked about my youth and the tokra my my small life that I had on this earth under saying how beautiful I was, and then saying how wonderful I was, and I can hear it all day. But you know what, it doesn't matter. What matters is what's going with me. None of these people are going to go with me. All these people crying over my dead body don't realize that I am alive. And I wish I could speak to them. And I wish I could tell them wake up fools. Wake up, stop breathing, for I was

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dreaming a moment ago and now I'm awake. But they don't they can't listen to me. I can scream as loud as I want. Only the angels can hear me. And as they take my body from where it is. And they lift my body. They take me straight to the muster.

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And when they take me every moment, or every time the tire is going over a bump. I can I have flash memories of my own life. And as I'm going and the windows besides me have got the trees that go past it. And I can see the building go past I think what a what a deceiving and deluding world. And as I'm going past I see people, people wanting to get the best cars but I see cars metal now. They're only metal, they're going to return to the earth. And I see people wanting to get big buildings. And I think what crazy people What will you do you can't even live into that. And one day that's going to become dust. All I see is dust dust. I will the humans I see they're all dust around me one day

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they're going to become dust as well. And as I take me into the mall, and they take me inside, they start to wash my body

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and they wash me all over. My eyes are closed. eyelids are closed but I am fully wide eyed, open and awake.

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And I hear them. And I hear the comments they make about me. And they tell me, they want to lift my head. And I want to put my back up, and they put me back down. And I'm still inside here. I just can't move his body. But I hear every single sound. And I think what was that all about? I spent a lifetime a lifetime looking after my body.

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I used to grow my body, and this body is a waste is the waste for me today is a waste. What did I do? What did I do, and these nails that I've got

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and the and the feet that I've got, and the toenails that I've got. That's it. It's all cold is becoming hard. On my body already within three minutes of death, my brain died.

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Oxygen was deprived from here and it died. And within another few minutes already gases are now coming up in my body. And that's what makes me smell foul. And they're washing my body. If they keep me alive for longer, they will smell such a smell that they will not be able to bear me anymore. That's what it was. Was that my body was that it? Was that it? And as they wash me,

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they move me up so that it does anything in my bowels it comes out and anything in sodomy comes out and it comes out and they wash it away.

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And what I'm thinking right now is forget this. What is to be of tomorrow. So they lift me, put me on another tray and they dry me. And then they put the cloth over me three pieces, one around my navel around my waist, another one around my shoulders, another one all the way around. And then the tie the two ends and they think I can't see them. And they think I can't hear them. But I can see everything and I can hear everything. And then they take me to the masjid into the main hall. And as the Imam starts to get ready all that's going in my head is which Salah did I miss? Which Salah did I miss all my Allah? Oh my Allah, but now it's a no avail. I had such a comfortable mattress because

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of that I missed my father prayers. And I because of my work I delayed my answer prayers regularly. Yeah, Allah, Allah, but I can't do anything right now. And because of my because of my smartphone, I was lazy on the couch, and I delayed to Asia. And sometimes I prayed it and sometimes I missed it. And because of my WhatsApp and because of all these other things going around around technology, I had little time for the Quran, with the Quran with the Quran. If only I could read the Quran, but nothing would be of any avail. And the smiles when did I smile? How many times or smile? How many times are good to summer? Oh, that's a very good memory. I was good. Yes, yes, I gave them gifts.

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Yes. Well, that least that should come with me. Oh my Allah worried about the moments that I was horrible. And I was crew, and I raised my voice. And I started to shout unnecessarily. And I was horrible to those people who were about the moments when I was there. And I just wanted the attention and I wasn't thinking of Allah, Allah will happen to me. And these thoughts will be of no, well, what's gonna go with me is the main question. And as the man has said, his Salah, and he gets someone gets a congregation ready. And they're back to read my janaza prayer. All I can think of is I hope this prayer is the one that forgives me. And I look around to see how many people have come

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to my janaza prayer. And as they finish my janaza prayer, they take my body, they uncover my face, and everyone turns around, and I can see them one by one rotating and looking at my face. And they have got tufts

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in their mouth. And they say in nearly ledger in Eldorado and my closest kin

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they get hugs and they cry and they miss me but you know what? I wish I could wake them up. I'm not bothered about the tears. I'm not bothered about them. Right now about the missing me. I'm bothered about their future. I want to warn them the way death came to me. I wish I could warn them but it's too late. And they carry me on the trolley all the way across the carpet into the into the house. And once they put me into the house, the door closes and that's it. You know what? I'm not even going to see the greenness anymore.

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I'm not going to see the blue sky anymore. I'm not even going to see cars anymore. You know, all my life I died to try and get good cars all my life. I wanted to have good shoes and good clothes and all my life. I want to have big buildings. You know what? You know what? Right now, I'm going to be the same as every single soul, I only get three and a half feet.

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On one way, I only get so many feet the other way. And that's it. That's it. And as they take me and they take me out of the coffin, and right now they're at the graveyard. And they're there on their shoulders. And I'm thinking to myself, no, no, no, is that a is that the last time I see the blue sky, and the last time that I feel the oxygen of this earth, but you know what I have to go. And as they lo me because my body is decomposing. They lo me I can see the walls of my own grave towering above me. And they put me on to the surface of the grave. And once they put it there, the greatest tears now come to my own Kim's eyes, and they cry, and a couple of them they crawl out of the grave.

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And then they say mean ha ha Lacuna Coil. We had Marie Dooku woman, Hannah, Tara, I'm thinking it's me now in the grave, how many graveyards I went to. And I did that to others. While I still didn't take the heat from the graveyard, how many lessons I could have taken from all the graveyards. But I didn't do that all I've been reduced to now is a grave myself. And they drop the first soil and the next bit and the next bit and the next bit. And as they drop it and drop it and Rodney is getting darker and darker and darker and darker. And all I can think of is

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this eye these eyes of mine, the sockets have dropped. That dropped into the sockets. And I'm thinking what did I see with these least eyes? What did I do with this lease is? What did I do with these leased hands? And the leased feet? What did I do with what Allah gave me for a few moments on this earth? And this earth? It stinks. Everything on it? I wish I wish I never ran for it. I wish I never chased it. Because today, those very eyes have dropped into the sockets and either roar the soul have to answer how I used those eyes. What I see Yala those things I saw. I wish you have forgot. And I wish you have forgiven me forgiving me for unlimited away because I don't want to face

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you. I don't want to face you anymore with his eyes, that I've used these very eyes in his body as about to rot and I saw those things. Yeah, a lot of his tongue in my own mouth. And the things that I said, and the moments I spent Oh, how many times have Vica? Did I do how many times I'm done. Let me put the flash.

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I'm so lucky. I did Vicki there. And then and that night, and that day, and that moment, and here. And I listened to a few lectures and that yes has is there anymore? Is there anymore? anymore anymore? How many degrees you have? How much? How much do I have? How many moments don't really think about a lot. How many times do I attend Salah? How many times did I was I good? Haven't done very fast. Who Where are these? Where are they?

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What about the moments that I didn't do the crap in LA. I know those moments went to waste and I should have taken heat. It was the most simplest thing I could do with the most reward today. All I needed to do is as I'm going through the dunya through my thing, all I need to do is keep my tongue busy. But did I do that? I've got huge regrets in me. And as they fill the soil up, all I can think of is their footsteps above the ground. They're going to leave me right now. They're going to walk away. And guess what? I can hear their footsteps

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and they cry and they make a loss. And as they're making the footsteps away. I know before the last person takes the 14th step away from my grave than the two angels are going to come and ask me those questions. And I need to think what is it that I've got to say to them at this moment? What is it that I can say? Yeah, Allah, Allah Yama, Yama, Yama, Yama is so doc yeah Allah Ya Allah but guess what? Allah Allah life only he has mercy. I see. No

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I don't see my friends anymore. Those fans will laugh. But they're going to go to their graves. And I'm in mind. Those friends that tweeted me, they're gone. And they'll carry on tweeting above about my deaths. And they'll say things good things about me that that said, they'll move on in life. Within a few months, they'll find better friends. Within a few weeks, they'll replace me and I'm already gone, but my memories will be replaced and my next of kin, what are they going towards? They're going towards my bank, towards my money's towards my wardrobe towards the things that I owned, but I didn't own them. I realized that right now. I'm not least me. My life. He leaves me my

00:35:53--> 00:36:13

body. He leaves me my closed he leaves me my property. He leaves me the roof over my head. He wasn't even mine and such a fool I was thinking that this wouldn't happen to me. I wish I wish. I wish I could go back

00:36:15--> 00:36:40

and the only thing on my mouth is Rob build your own Rob Rolo, please, please, please let me wake up from this dream. Please let me wake up from this. Let me go but Allah I will show you I will show you you give me a moment. And I'll show you how I can spend all of it and this is my These are my words that are in the Quran. I read this parada to keep in Surah Morocco surah number 63. Allah azza wa jal said in the Quran.

00:36:42--> 00:36:44

Allah Dena Amanullah to leave

00:36:49--> 00:36:49

the Quran

00:36:50--> 00:37:15

are you who believe Do not let the things that you are attracted to the things that you are inclined towards in this world. Don't let those things make you go away from the vicar and the remembrance of Allah, or you believe Don't let your children in particular take you away from the vicar and from the remembrance of Allah, Mama, Daddy Kappa hula

00:37:18--> 00:38:10

and those of you that will do that and will be heedless of my remembrance, then they will be the losers in the end, when merasakan give away and make channels for all the things that I've given to you all the gifts of bestowed on you give them away your time, spend it on others for my sake, your money, spend it on others for my sake, your health, whatever it is that you can strive for, spend it on others for my sake. And if you do that you will have something here I mean, oddly, I had a cool note before a day comes when death arrives to you, fire pool and you will say and these are my words that I'm saying right now. Allah said in the Holy Quran, and I should have taken heat for your pool

00:38:10--> 00:38:15

or biloela haunt any

00:38:17--> 00:38:52

body less one of you gets to the time of death and says to me, oh my lord or my provider who provided me all of these gifts who provided me us who provided me beauty, who provided me intelligence who provided me education, who provided me friendship, who provided me money, who provided me status, who provided me with the links I have, who provided me leadership who provided me with this with everything that I have on this earth. Oh my Lord, my provider, Lola. Hello Tony.

00:38:54--> 00:39:04

Cody, have you only decided after showing me death that I've got a little bit of an extension. Just give me a few more moments.

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For some data I will show you a law I will sacrifice everything for you. My property is sebata my bank hola vt Sokka My money is self calm. My clothes are saga calm, my whole life will be sadhaka I will give everything I own in this world away. And for me a minute solid clean and I will show you how much of a pious person I can be our largest do this for a moment and I will prove to you how different I can be. And Allah says this no matter what a cinema either.

00:39:48--> 00:39:59

And when the moment Arise for anyone that Allah will not delay it by a single moment, while mavo hobby the meta Malou

00:40:00--> 00:40:54

And Allah is well aware of the actions that you are performing well aware of the actions that we have done. Oh my God, if I had, if I take in heat, but it's dark, it's dark. And that's it. See, I never see my mom and dad again until the dead gentlemen. But I don't want to know them anymore. I want to know if I've made it. I want to know if, if I've done the right thing. And all I see is regret over the moments I wasted. And if I could go back there, I would throw away that technology. If I would go back there, I would stick to a timetable. If I would go back there, I would change my life. If I went back there, I will say to my friends, you choose, you choose for me to be happy in

00:40:54--> 00:41:34

the grave of sad in the grave? What do you want me to do? And they'll say that they want me to be happy, and I will turn around to them. And I would say to them, then let us spend some time for Allah, I would say that to my friends, I wouldn't care. I wouldn't care who would boast around me and say that I am being a whim at this moment, I wouldn't care. And all those moments I spent trying to get attention out of things, forgetting what attention, we're all equal. In the next world. We're all to be reduced to dust, and to a grave that is so dark, and cold. And now, as they've taken the 37 step,

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and the 38 step.

00:41:40--> 00:41:42

And the 39 step.

00:41:43--> 00:41:49

I know now, I can see two lights that come towards me.

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And it's them

00:41:52--> 00:41:53

nucky Mancha,

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they've come, they're coming, I can see the light, the 14th step has gone. And the afternoon. The one who looks off, the graveyard has to close the gates. And my family can no longer stay aware or they have to, they have to distribute everything that I had. And all the land that I had abroad is all this. And they're going to take it but you know what? I don't even care. I don't care. All I care about is me. I care about myself now. And I did others other things for others. And what did I do? Well, the moments that were spent without anything in the shower, er, they were a waste. Yes, I get rewarded for buying food for my family. And I will get that reward, I get reward for working

00:42:49--> 00:43:30

Yes, I earned the livelihood for my family, because it was something I needed to feed them with. Yes, I got reward for that. But these are not the great rewards I'm looking for one. So bahala lot today, one Alhamdulillah. If I could do one more, you know what you just send me back. And I will sit there all day. And I will just say Subhana Allah hamdulillah night and I will sit there all day. And I will try to read the Quran. And if I can't read it all day, I will try and read as much as I can. And I'll be up and down using my tongue just remembering a lot. And I wouldn't care about anyone because you know what, none of that will come from my help. today. No one exists today. The

00:43:30--> 00:44:14

only one exists is me and Allah and that's it. That's it. That's all is reduced time to. And Allah did say that I would come alone, but I never knew it was like this. Why they come to come tomorrow? You know what, after two generations, nobody's even going to come and care for my grave. After my grandchildren just about see me. That's it. two generations. And that said, the third generation won't even know my name. And I'll be here for a good few 100 years and what did I do for 60 years or 40 years? What did I do for 30 years? What do I do? I was out there and I was trying to get the best of this world and Allah all along said that this world is a delusion.

00:44:16--> 00:44:17

And I didn't wake up.

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My body heard it. My ears heard it. But I didn't wake up.

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And I wish I had that moment. I wish I thought and as the light comes comes comes comes comes towards me, comes towards me. comes to Atlanta here.

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And I wake up in my bed. The alarm is going off.

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I'm in my room.

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I'm really here.

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sweating all over,

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sweating, my pillows wet.

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And I get up. I think I'm here. I'm hamster in this vault. I'm here. I'm here. I've just had an experience, like no other.

00:45:21--> 00:46:00

It was gonna be that vivid. And he cannot let me move. Ya La, La La La La, la, la la la, la la la, I'm going to do, I'm going to go to the mercy I'm going to do, I'm going to read no further, I'm going to change my life. Today, I'm going to be different person today. You know what, I am going to now now use my smartphone as I should do, and I'm going to cage it. And it's going to have its own time. I'm not going to get bothered by my friends. I'm going to tell them about this dream. And I'm going to tell them you know what, you guys just get on man. I'm What? I can't believe this is happening. I cannot believe once I tell my family members, I will tell them how real it was that I

00:46:00--> 00:46:50

just suddenly had. I was there. I was gone. I felt everything. And today I brought my life back. Yeah, a lot. The first thing I will do is to record tober to you. And I'm going to return back to you. And here I am. Law upon tears, tears flowing through my chest down my face, tears, tears. I'm lucky to be alive. And who cares about those argues and who cares about stress. And who cares about me trying to do extra hours? I don't care. I don't care. I know what it is to die. And I'm going to go to the zoo today. And I from the bottom of my heart, I'm going to say to the Hon Allah, Allah, Allah Subhana, Allah, Allah who wants to stay there for three hours. Today, seven, no nine no 11

00:46:51--> 00:47:27

I'm going to say that I every moment of the salon enjoy. And guess what I want to make with all those people I wanted to make up with. And all those people I was horrible with how to I want to say so to them. I want to really from the bottom of my heart, I want to say so to them, because I know what it is that I just saw death in my face. I went to my grave, and those lights, those lights came I never realized that it was daylight. It was the dorm break that was gonna wake me up. And I didn't realize that. But today, today, I'm so lucky and I'm gonna change my whole life, my whole life is gonna change. And even when I'm sitting at the dinner table, I'm going to do Vicar, because I knew

00:47:27--> 00:48:03

that that was the most precious thing, the most easiest thing you can do. And every day I'm gonna have code and every day never going to miss my prayers. I'm never going to delay my prayers. I'm never going to be bad to anyone. I'm never going to miss any of that. And I'm going to do my best to go to sleep early wake up early and do my dad did in the night because I saw in the AFI that I was worth a lot of money. A lot of money man you call it money in this world. I'm telling you right now that's the acuras money that's the money of the era and we need it I wake up and return with me to Allah azza wa jal and change your whole life and forget about the fame and forget about everything

00:48:03--> 00:48:47

else. Everyone tells you. Whatever they told me is nothing is worth nothing. You I only see dust. I see dust. I see papers of certificates of land. I think there's dust and I see lands and people are fighting over it does. I see people trying to go for the next property I see does, yes, I do want to earn this world. But I'm going to be careful right now. I'm going to be wise man, I'm just going to earn as much as I need my family needs. And that's me done Brother, brother, that's me done. I want to spend the rest of my life as much as I can. For my real world. Because I am I am on lease time. And this body of mine is leased, and I don't own it. I will never have it. It's nothing. Yes, I'm

00:48:47--> 00:49:27

gonna groom it as I used to do, but I'm not gonna forget that is just fake. Its fake. It's a shell. It's going to decompose and I felt those maggots inside the grave. And you know what, man? You know what? I'm not going to be fooled again, not gonna be fooled again with the people around me and trying to deceive me and take me away from this. I'm not going to be fooled with the movies that come out and all those things. I've tried to distract people. I'm not going to be fooled anymore. I know my Allah and that is the only one that matters to me right now. Because all of you, all of you, family members and friends and everyone I've known you will not travel with me, nor will I travel

00:49:27--> 00:49:37

with you. And that's my thing that I've returned to Allah and I'm asking you to return to Allah is up. No Hype bla bla bla me