Family – Part 4

Hacene Chebbani

Channel: Hacene Chebbani

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Difficult Issues in the Quran

Episode Transcript

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Santa Monica

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hamdulillahi Rabbil alameen wa salatu salam ala Shashi mousseline, Sina Mohammed who are early he was so happy he is

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so shallow continue with this topic which is difficult

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family issues in the Quran

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and we will finish inshallah, tonight the topic of Sora to know or what is called the slander of Asia of the Allahu Allah, we still have maybe a couple of hours to talk about and then we move to a different story. So, last time we stopped,

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I am maybe 23 in which Allah subhanho wa Taala said indeed those who falsely accuse chaste and aware and believing woman

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cursed in this world. This is a very small loss, Mandela is talking about a major sin here. They are cursed in this world, and the year after, and they will have a great punishment. So Allah subhanaw taala is warning those who accuse the chaste an aware and believing woman staying at home, you don't know what's going on, people are talking about them outside and falsely accusing them

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Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam confirmed in his sooner that it is a major sin one of the actually he called it when he said in the famous heading Eastern evil, a separate animal because

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he said to stay way avoid the seven great destructive sins, or the seven deadly sins. And he started with the shark.

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You know taking a partner or associating a partner with Allah subhanaw taala and he mentioned magic, killing an innocent person, an innocent soul and he mentioned some other no sins and then at the end he said Cthulhu Sonata Luffy Latin minute. So it is one of the seven destructive sins which is accusing or falsely accusing the chase and aware believing woman. And this hadith is found in Sahih al Bukhari and Muslim to it is agreed upon. And then the next idea, he said, Oh my gosh, how do I lay him alsina to him? What ad Zulu be McAndrew, Yamato. He said, actually, their tanks will witness against them, and their hands will witness against them and their feet will witness against them.

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They will be a witness for what they used to do. So people will be disputing with the last panel to Allah in a different Hadith we know that the person will will refuse to accept any other witness except himself and Allah

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will say yes, you want to witness from yourself and then he will not stretch I will place a seal on his mouth, and then his body parts will be talking and it will be witnessing against him. So Allah subhanaw taala is telling us about these people who will who are accusing him you know, chaste woman, and Minato huffy. That's how I shall do de la Juana. You know that so deep dive into su de la one of the most beloved wife of our Prophet Mohammed says among his wives in a he used to have a great relationship with Alisha. His wife is his honor. Erica Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and sell people are talking about her and her story till today.

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And then in the next aisle, as I said, you may even you are female. Whoa, whoa, Dina homeowner, where animal anila what happened with Ruby that day? Allah will pay them in full. They're deserved recompense for what they did. And they will know that it is allows perfect injustice. And then at the end of the story, Allah subhanaw taala told us in Surah in Isaiah 26 a very important principle for everyone every Muslim should be concerned about this. And he said here alphabet will have a theme. We'll have the funeral hubby set. What by immaculate baby Ivana Lita, Yvette. una una me Maria kulu boryspil Carrie. So here there are different translation of this ayah one of the

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translations is that even words are for evil men.

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And evil men are more subjected to evil words and good words for good men. And good men are an object of good

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words those people are declared the those people who are declared innocent of what the slander is say any those those innocent people, those pure people, the latter ones, were

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I mentioned here at the Buddha that Allah subhanho wa Taala is declaring them innocent of what the slanders those who accused them falsely and then said for them is forgiveness and a noble provision for those who are innocent. But most of the translators translated this idea in a different way. So, there are basically two translation here. Most of them, they said, the principal corrupt woman, for corrupt men, and corrupt manner for corrupt woman, just as good and pure woman for good and pure men,

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good and pure manner for good and pure woman. And then, at the end of the the second party said on account of the purity, the latter are innocent of all that evil tongues, impute to them for them is forgiveness and a generous provision. So, the owner may hear this advice, basically, purity or impurity is either prescribed or actually attributed to people. So, there are a few people, people who are not pure, they are people who are corrupt, or they are this purity or impurity is ascribed to actions and deeds. And I love No Chi ma said, you know, this, I actually includes all this stuff.

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So, there are few people and their actions and their statements are pure, because a pure actions and pure statement would come from good people, a pure people, right. But if someone is filled is not a pure, he doesn't have a clean intention, then his action and his statements and his deeds will not be pure. So proclaim Rama to La la, he said, You know, this is should include all these statements or all these devices. And this is what will allow revolutionary research, the only the famous professor, he said this is the right translation or interpretation of this ayah. He said evil speech is more suited to evil people. And good speech is more suited to good people. And he said what the

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hypocrites attributed to a show the Alola is more suited to them. And she is rather more suited to innocence. So these are the awkward or the, you know, the opinions of mufa ciruit, about this ayah. But this is a warning, actually, to all of us.

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To every Muslim, every one of us should be concerned about this. Why? Because the owner decided, you know, based on this idea, we have to watch what we say.

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And that's why we have the Arabic saying could enter in Bhima V on the Whoa

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there is a famous Arabic saying kulu enter in V Murphy and the which could be translated their vessel filters what it contains. So what comes out of your mouth actually it is an indication of what is inside.

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So you have to be careful. And there is a famous saying in English, he said what is bred in the bone will come out in the flesh.

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So we have to be careful about the language we use. People will not people don't know what is inside your heart, but the moment you talk

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and you interact with them. And the way you address them the way you talk to them people will have an idea about your personality. So this is something that we have to pay attention to. That's why our solar system said McKenna you know belay with the overlocker failure coherent, earlier smart is that whoever believes in Allah subhana wa tada and the last day, then let him speak in a good way. Or if he doesn't find anything good to say, let him be quiet. Let him be silent is better for him. It's better than taking the risk and saying something that doesn't please Allah subhanho wa Taala and you'll be taken to account for it on the Day of Judgment.

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Miss Allah subhanaw taala salam o Latvia.

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So as a conclusion here one as a conclusion, what we learned from this story that patience has a sweet,

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sweet fruits. Patients will always have sweet fruits. You are always a winner when you are when you are patient. Allah subhanaw taala will be in your sight.

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Allah subhanaw taala will be in your side Allah subhanaw taala will support you. Allah subhanaw taala will declare your innocence when you are patient.

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And also SN

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and the example of aboubaker is a wonderful example of

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you know going that extra making that extra mile for the sake of Allah subhana wa tada and you know what I'm talking about the his behavior

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What he did to his cousin, the same cousin who accused he used to receive who was poor, and he used to receive financial support from a worker, and yet he participated in this evil talk. But yet Allah subhanaw taala

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invited abubaker to forget about his sin, forget about his mistake.

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You know, I want to give my hope but today when I gave me hope by today, I told people in my hotbar, that you know, we have the freedom to ask Allah subhanaw taala for anything when you make dua, except there are two restrictions. There are two restrictions in our you cannot ask Allah subhanaw taala to help you commit a sin, this is the first restriction you cannot otherwise it will be a major problem he cannot ask Allah Subhana Allah helped me to be a sinful person can do that. And the second restriction is you don't make it do it against a family member.

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Because this is

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a tribe? No, I got people after the hotbar telling me I can't they have done too much evil to me. Family we're talking about family members. I sell still you can use has to be alone I'm a rookie you can use other us be it's difficult. I cannot tell you are you seeking a fatwa from me? You want me to tell you go and make against your family members. Even if they took your money to heal property, I mean, they are family members of the end ask Allah Subhana Allah to give them hidayah so the bring the restore your rights, and they give you your money or they give you your prior your you know, properties or whatever they have taken from you. Or they ask for your forgiveness, if they hurt you

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in any way or shape, but don't make do against your family members. They are at the end your family members. So you can say has to be alone I'm in working. Although we do amudha in a line the Love is a bad if you feel that you are the victim of evil plots. This is an indirect statement asking Allah subhanaw taala for protection. This is a dose of the

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armory Illa in the lava serum. To whom?

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min

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min Alif around in which surah describes mentioned

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surah Robert, do you know the number of the

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4444 this man believed in musala SLM secretly, so there are people around found out about him and they wanted to kill him. So he made that to beautiful.

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armory. Illa Allah a trust and trust over affairs to Allah. Well for the Armory in Allah. Allah has even been a bad Allah subhanho wa Taala a seeing of his servants he sees that he knows their about their plans. Let's find out Allah is not often he knows about their plants. He knows about the strategies he knows about their plots.

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So for kahoolawe who

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see it mama Kuru Allah subhanaw taala protected him. He provide Allah provided his protection, here comes the importance of dariah. What, but you need to make dua in the right way. So here we talked about summer, we talked about this. And these are the great lessons we learned from the story of Asia and what else is new than maintaining a good opinion about other people maintaining good opinion about your family members.

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As soon as SLM was a little bit we said confused. He was asking his family members making Matura with them. But he never mistreated Arusha. He did not mistreat Ayesha for 27 days, he didn't open up this issue with her. He knows that she was sick. She was not feeling well. Didn't want to even though he was it was a very painful experience for him and his salad was set up. Imagine the only people outside talking about your wife is not something easy. This is what he had gone through what he had somehow and he was ill

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and he was extremely patient. But this is her son of London. He knows he knew he was just talking, asking because he was a husband at the end he was a human being and he had to talk to his some of his family members asking for their opinion and their input. But he had a good opinion about Asia and their parents to their parents did not react in the wrong way didn't overreact so they had a good opinion about their daughter. Now Susan year one is something that is distract destroying our family relationships. It's very it's destroying

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suven presuming, making wrong assumptions about our family members and friends and, you know, and trying to interpret this

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statements are interpreted in in the wrong way. This is something that we have in our family life, you know, communal life. You know, someone would say something in a Muslim in a gathering, and you feel like me, he may be talking about you.

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Talking about your method and for example, I'll give you an example. This is a complaint that I got for a couple of times, someone who decide not to buy a house through the mortgage. He didn't go to the bank and get a mortgage, even though he's working and he has as a full time job, but all his cousins go their houses through the bank. And the way they get together, they get together, he's the only one who is renting and all of them own their houses. And someone told me what lies very difficult you feel like they're making statements like they're hitting you with missiles.

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No, he could be right these people could be mean it could be trying to encourage him to, to go to the bank and get his and buy his house, buy something that he cannot handle. It is really difficult. So then you have to have several regenda is not cheap.

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Jana, Allah, Allah tala Alia if you own Gemini, you have to sacrifice. You have to be patient. I know when your family members are talking about the achievements. What kind of achievement buying a house through a mortgage is not a great achievement. I mean, anyone who has a full time job can go to the bank and get a get the house through the mortgage rate, the conventional mortgage and talking about conventional mortgages. But when people start you know talking to each other about it and then hinting to you that you could be a failure or you're not successful businessman or you are not you didn't achieve the American dream.

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No, owning your house, American Dream tell them I want I want what, what kind of dream you're looking for

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Jana,

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the divine dream.

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I'm looking for something else, the promise of Allah subhanho wa Taala. Anyway, but we shouldn't exaggerate. They could be any someone in our family in a gathering, he could be talking about his achievement without intending to hurt you. He's just talking about his achievements. If you didn't, if you are not able to make the same achievements, you should be a moment that Allah subhanaw taala Castleman arzak, Allah subhanaw taala has divided the risk between people, some people are wealthy and rich. So people are not but they say the most important thing. People who are making money are they making money in a halal way or not? This is the this should be the most important thing for you

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in your mind as a moment, if they're making it in Halloween should be happy for them and making dua for them that will bless their wealth, and bless them, bless their families, and then these will

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come back to you in a positive way. Because the last pantalla will send an angel,

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this angel will make a draft for you. And to you the same when you make a do especially when make a draft for your brother or your sister, or your cousin when they are not in front of you. When it's not in their presence. They don't know that you are making draft for them. And Allah knows that you are sincere in your job because you're not doing this dr to please them. You're doing it because you love them. And you want to bless their wealth and bless your family. So this is very important.

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So personal one maintaining No, I don't want to it's a very important, you know, subject to animate any good people having this idea or holding this principle that everyone is innocent until proven guilty.

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So very famous, very famous saying right? Everyone is innocent, until proven guilty. So don't try to look into the intentions of people and trying to make inclusion, jump, jump to conclusion and try to come up with a conclusion. The brother method passed by today he didn't offer sell and maybe he was busy. Maybe he was thinking about something else.

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Don't try to build the story on it. Don't build the story on it. He was busy. He was thinking about something else. Maybe he had a family issues thinking about the conversation that he had with his wife or something. So given the benefit of of doubt,

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time will move to another another subject which is Parent Child relations in the Quran. And we will start with a talk with the story of Ibrahim Allison.

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The story of the brain Elisa Lam is a beautiful story. But it is a difficult one when it comes to his relationship with his father. Majority of firmly

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believe that his father was not a Muslim. His father was a Catholic and he was making idols. It was actually making it

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and selling them

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making idols and selling them in the market. So and Allah subhanaw taala told us about, you know, this difficult issue or this conversation, beautiful conversation that took place between Abraham and a seller and and his father, and most of the time and he said his father, his name was Azur because Allah, Allah mentioned his name in Surah chapter six. But in Surah, Miriam, Allah subhanaw taala told us about the way Ibrahim Ali Salah was addressing his father the way he was inviting him to the deen of Allah subhanho wa Taala. And then I must tell I started this story by saying in Surah, two, Miriam was called Phil kitabi Ibrahima in who can assist de carne nebia. So this is the

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beginning of the story, Allah subhanaw taala telling us that Ibrahim was a great man. He was a man of truth, and a prophet alayhi salaatu wa Salaam is currently Abbe De Lima taboo mala is well, what are you? What are you?

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So he said, mentioned when he said to his father, oh, my father, but they're also really mad. He said the right translation here should be Oh, my dear father. Why? Because Ibrahim was saying, Yeah, Betty. He was not saying Yeah, Abby. And there is a difference between here Abby evety. We'll talk about it here now. But he told him he had Why do you worship that which does not he does not see and does not benefit you in any way does not benefit you at all. It's a stone. So basically, you are worshipping a stone.

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This,

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you know, this conversation or this incident.

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This scenario could be repeated in at any time. Okay, we have people, Muslim brothers who accepted Islam, but their parents rejected them or rejected their faith.

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Or they didn't agree with their choice. The decision that they made, he became Muslims now.

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Sometimes the same in the same family, they get to different different reactions. One time it was in one in one province in Canada in a different place. And it was a sister who accepted Islam. So when she was told that she needs to wear hijab, she was worried about you know, going out for the first time wearing the hijab, because she grew up in the neighborhood. And she knows everyone in the neighborhood in that place. She was she was it was very difficult for her to you know, to change suddenly changing would

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look like a Muslim man walking the street. So what happened is,

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I was told by the reaction in the same family the reaction of her mother was very different than the reaction for her father. And her sister, her mother, she became more Christian now. She's talking about the church and going through the church and you know,

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holding tight to our Deen should go back to our Deen and learn about Jesus and everything. That was the reaction of her mother. She rejected her. Her Deen our her choice. And she was not happy about the decision. Her daughter made. What was the reaction of her father and her and her sister. Father, as he said she was talking to them about the hijab and how difficult it is to go outside for the first time wearing the hijab, in a neighborhood where you know, everyone

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she grew up in that neighborhood. And her father told her

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and her sister, were willing to wear the hijab, the father is saying, I'm willing to wear the hijab, and go outside with you, to support you.

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So Panama, there are nice people, the only there is a poor thing is the decision of his own daughter, even though he did not accept Islam. But he said I'm willing, willing to wear a hijab and go outside with you as a sign of my support. So anyway, and his brothers and sisters who accept Islam

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goof Yeah, some of them. Some of them, some of them find it easy Alhamdulillah and they get acceptance from the family members, but some of them are rejected by the families. And they find it very difficult actually to stay, to stay within the same family or to keep actually a good relationship with other family members. But the last Hallo to Allah has given us some guidance here and we need to pay attention to it. And it applies to those new Muslims. And it applies to those who were not practicing the dean.

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And he decided to practice start practicing the dean they came back to the Dean of Allah subhanaw taala and they start going to the masjid and learning about the deen. But while their parents are

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other family members are still holding some secular views. And they're worried about, you know about the new activities or the new direction their children are taking. Some of them some of the parents that are Muslims, that they don't pray, they don't come to the masjid. And they think that going to the masjid might might, you know, might actually

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affect, you know, the children in a negative way. And they become like, extremists or they become terrorists, or there are many parents who have these concerns. Muslim, I'm talking about Muslim parents, I'm not talking about non Muslim parents, Muslim parents who don't understand the religion,

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who don't have knowledge. And then when suddenly with them and the whole family is secular, they don't practice a deed. And then they got a man or woman who now started learning suddenly or Fatima, they started learning about their Deen, they're going to university now participating with MSA with their activities and then they telling their parents you need to start to praying and doing this and that and that. So you know, parents are concerned. So now how to maintain this balance between concern of course in the wrong way they should be happy. They should be happy that their children are coming back to the deen and they are praying and they are learning about the deen of Allah

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subhana wa Tada. But it is a situation that many of our brothers and sisters find themselves in and they have to go through this struggle. You know, how do we maintain this balance between Islam

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being committed to Allah subhana wa Taala and between difficult, you know, parents, so how do we deal in this, you know, with this situation in the most beautiful way? We're looking for the most beautiful way the guidance of the crown.

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Because we agreed before right? The best guidance is the guidance of the Quran should go back to the Quran and learn from the guidance of Allah subhana wa Taala. He illustrated is giving us a principle in Surah lachemann Allah, Allah says in Surah Rahman and this is a general principle. What in tjahaja Allah unto sharika be melaye Salah Kabir Mo, Salah Tutera Houma was a Hebrew Murphy dunya maruka. So last minute Allah is giving us

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a clear instruction. Now here clear guidance. And this guidance is composed of two

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elements, the first element, Allah subhanaw taala said but if we endeavor to make you associate with me that if which you have no knowledge about, they are inviting you to worship an idol. They are inviting you to become an atheist, inviting you to leave abandon the prayer, inviting you to abandon the Quran to disobey Allah subhanho wa Taala telling you, this Islam is not good for you. We don't want you to go to the masjid. We don't want you to be to mingle with those, this bearded man or nano, Sister, don't wear our daughter, don't wear the hijab, don't do that and so on and so forth. So Allah subhanaw taala is saying latinautor Houma, you cannot obey them. If it involves if this

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obedience involves the disobedience of Allah subhana wa la parte de Lima gluten, FEMA, Seattle

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Musleh De Lima, la tollemache lupane FEMA, Seattle as a region, there should be no obedience to the creation, if it involves the disobedience to the creator to Allah subhanho wa Taala. But the second element is very important was our dunia. meroofer

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but he said Allah, Allah say, but keep company with them in this world, in appropriate with appropriate kindness. So let's, let's talk about my roof. My roof is when we talk about my roof we talk about good manners. We talk about kindness we talk about the world mouth is a general term that includes everything that is good, that Allah Allah is pleased with. And Allah subhanaw taala is happy with this is how Allah Spanish Allah wants you to treat your parents

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and we're talking about non Muslim parents here. I want you to pay attention to this. Because the problem that we have in our in our times here one,

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there are many youth who when they find

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their new

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you know,

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they discover their religion again for the first time and they become the start practicing the deen of Allah subhanho wa Taala. The problem is some of them become very judgmental

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because their parents are not practicing

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They become very judgmental. And they forget that last week, last month, or last year, they were not practicing.

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They were like their parents or their or their sisters and their brothers.

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We were not praying. We were not be reading the Quran. But the last panel to Allah has blessed them with guidance. So instead of becoming more humble, instead of humbling themselves to Allah subhanaw taala and ask Allah for help to guide their parents, and tecmyer family members with Sheva with Rama with mercy because they should be concerned about the well being of their parents, like hear the story of Ibrahim alayhis. Salam, we will This is our main topic today is he was concerned about the well being of his father.

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The way he was approaching him and talking to him. So he was talking to a machinery key and someone who was who is not Muslim. And this is the opinion majority of scholars, there is a discussion here, there is an opinion of a minority, a minority, small group of scholars, then the guy who was having this discussion with Abraham was not his father. It was either his grandfather or or uncle. And he said, Actually, the parents Abraham's parents were Muslims. And they proved that they have Rahim Salam in Surah t Brahim included them and he's asking for forgiveness, praying to Allah to forgive him, forgive his parents and forgive his forgive his the rest of the money in the believers in Surah

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Surah Ibrahim. So these are this could be a proof that his parents, his own parents were Muslims. That allowed him we don't have a clear proof that his parents were Muslims. And we have no information about the mother of Ibrahim Alayhi Salam in the Quran. But this is the majority of scholars majority of whom have seen this actually, this conversation was with Ibrahim alayhis salam and his immediate father, his own father, he is real or biological father, it would if we would call it him this way.

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So the owner Murthy said, you know, the the point here the magic word here, the magic word is to maintain a balance between having an excellent because a lot of regulators talking about my role here. What sahoo Murphy dunia Maru. Maru is a very strong word. maintaining an excellent relationship with your parents, but at the same time giving priority to your relationship with Allah subhana wa Tada. And it should be clear, right? I know it's easy set. It's easier said than done. I know that. I mean, theory is always a beautiful theory is always easy to talk about and explain. When it comes to real life. It's very difficult. I know. Especially when you deal with someone who

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is extremely difficult. I know a father who did did not like his his daughter when she wore the hijab. She didn't he didn't like it. He didn't want her to wear the hijab, in the airport, she was traveling, and he came in he tried to remove the hijab or the scarf from her head, she was crying and then when she started crying, he left the airport she was traveling, anyone don't travel with this.

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It's very difficult. People sometimes come come to you know to the massage it with this issues. And we always tell them, there is no magic solution for this problem.

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Of course here you need to because you have to be very careful. At the end is your father at the Auntie's your mother, you have to be extremely careful when dealing with them. Even if they are harsh. If they are difficult to deal with. They are still your parents, you cannot exchange them. You cannot divorce them

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cannot. They're your parents. So you have to be extremely Allah, Allah say, you have to be extremely careful when you deal with your parents. And here as I said, this is a very good example because Abraham is dealing with a father who is not Muslim. And

00:34:21--> 00:34:26

is saying even if they tell you you have to make sure and may cover

00:34:27--> 00:34:59

you don't listen to them. That's okay. This is clear. Right? What's up Hey, Boomer, dounia Aruba. Making a balance, making a balance between your relationship having an excellent relationship with them. And at the same time, giving priority to your relationship with Allah subhana wa Tada. This is very important. So the remedy says even if they invite you to disobey Allah subhanho wa Taala you need to refuse in the best way you refuse

00:35:00--> 00:35:03

Use in the most gentle manner.

00:35:05--> 00:35:51

Ooh, this is this is very clear here. Allahu taala Adam, and I'm repeating myself just to emphasize this, this, this point here, because we don't want you to treat your parents with attitude, even if they have a different ideology. Different method invite you to practice a bit, or they invite you to make an offer or do anything. Don't treat your parents with attitude, your parents or your parents. You can tell them, debate with them. Ibrahim is debating with his father here debating having a debate or discussion with his father. This is wrong, what you're doing is wrong. I don't believe in that. I'm inviting you to a better way, which is still believing in Allah subhana wa Tada. So there

00:35:51--> 00:35:57

is nothing wrong with having a debate with your parents. But it has to be done in the most beautiful way.

00:35:58--> 00:36:17

So I told you the normal usage of this media, when you address your parents, Father, you say Abby, but Ibrahim alayhis salaam, used the abiti a different term. And they said the term here is replacing Yeah, and motor column. The Yeah, here the pronoun was the first person.

00:36:18--> 00:36:33

First Person Yeah. So and here the he said that it is used for a reason to show that you are addressing your father in the best way, addressing your father with respect. And at the same time, it is an indication of closer relationship

00:36:34--> 00:36:51

or in the indication of intimacy, that you have an intimate and close relationship to your father. So you're not someone who is, you know, a stranger and talking to your father, I'm concerned about you. I'm concerned about your well being. I'm concerned about your your future.

00:36:52--> 00:37:04

Everyone should be concerned about our future. All right. Is there a future that we all hope that the last shala would make us happy? And allow us to go to Jenna Bismillah to Allah and meet him.

00:37:05--> 00:37:06

So

00:37:09--> 00:37:24

when when it comes to debating and having a debate with your parents, there are many parents who don't like it, when their children argue with them or debate with them. They expect them to say yes, all the time. There are Muslim parents who are like that.

00:37:26--> 00:37:34

Sometimes Sometimes, yes. If your child is debating having a useless debate with you

00:37:35--> 00:37:35

know,

00:37:37--> 00:37:38

is trying just to play game.

00:37:41--> 00:38:23

Using using something you know that he's not honest in his debate or argument will, that's okay. You can tell me I mean, I don't want to have this conversation. But there are parents who do want to talk to their children about some methods, some sensitive issues, some problems that are taking place in this community in this in this society. I mean, it is a society. Like my family, I have some parents who came from overseas, and they find it difficult to, to discuss some sensitive issues that are very common in this society, a child will go to the school and talk to his friends or his friends will talk to him about methane. You know, you know what I'm talking about? illegal

00:38:23--> 00:38:45

relationship between methane men and women are Indian, some parents will find it very difficult to open up the subject to their children. So the child will come to his dad, because he's innocent, is learning these things homeschooled? I don't have to talk. They said no, don't talk to me about this. This is something that he learned from back home. I mean, it worked. In the old days.

00:38:46--> 00:38:55

Our parents would not discuss these kind of issues with us, right? But here, here, if you don't talk to your child, what will happen?

00:38:59--> 00:39:24

You, you're telling him go and talk to you about it with other people. And you don't know what kind of message he's receiving from other people. What kind of message he is receiving from a non Muslim teacher? What kind of message he's receiving from his classmates or friends, right? So you need to be an active parent and either and try to absorb your pride. Forget about your old culture.

00:39:26--> 00:39:35

I'm not saying forget about the dean. No, there's a difference between culture and Dean. Because I'm used to discuss these issues with the Sahaba.

00:39:36--> 00:39:48

before saying something talking about something sensitive or subtle, as I said, and we said in the law, hilarious that a minute, don't do this and this and this. Allah does not shy away from the truth.

00:39:49--> 00:39:55

This is a mocha deema an introduction that I am I'll be talking about something embarrassing, pay attention here.

00:39:56--> 00:39:59

And then he would say Allah in Allah

00:40:00--> 00:40:08

less than a minute. Allah does not shy away from the truth. Don't do this and this and this. I don't want to mention these examples. They are not our subject today.

00:40:10--> 00:40:31

But one time on one occasion, he said Rahim Allahu Nisa al unser lemmya. Ma hahnel hyah Minta alumi udimi hinda. He said, may Allah have mercy on the woman that Ansari woman, higher modesty and China's did not prevent them from coming to the Messenger of Allah and asking about some sensitive issues.

00:40:34--> 00:41:18

Even though the head higher in the community of the Sahaba, they had modesty higher was a sign of Eman, right? In the in the community but because this is our Deen, we need to talk about it. We need to learn it. There are people who, you know they have been doing things in the wrong way for years. And they didn't know that this is a major sin. I don't want to tell you about these things but didn't know that there was a major sin because didn't have the courage to come to the Imam and talk and ask about it. But there are some people handler they come and ask, they learn about their Dean in a private they ask about these sensitive issues. So you either now we don't have an excuse. Even

00:41:18--> 00:41:25

if you don't want to talk to the Imam about it. You have the internet. Even though you have to be careful. We're learning from the internet.

00:41:27--> 00:42:08

You have to find the right sources. If you want to learn from the internet, you have to be careful. You ask about you know the credibility of some websites or Canada and then you can learn from them. Or Masha Allah, you can contact any scholar, get his phone number, or send him an email if you don't want directly to talk to the email face to face. There are people who don't mention their names in the email, and they send an emails about some private issues. And they don't tell you who you are. We don't need to know. They don't mention their names. And they don't maybe they create an email for that for that purpose in your email for that purpose, who that you know, for that specific question.

00:42:09--> 00:42:23

So you don't know them. You don't know their image, which is fine. And we don't want to know people, but at least people have to learn about the methods of their D. So why did we come back to Annie? Okay, fair inshallah.

00:42:24--> 00:43:04

Oh, talking about pregnancy, we're talking about parents and having a discussion with their with their children. So some parents, they don't like it if their children want to have a debate or discuss the matters, which is fine. As long as your children are polite. As long as your children are showing the due respect, they're respecting you, you talk to you in a nice way. That's okay. You can open any discussion, talk to your children about any subject. Actually, they will feel happy, they will feel that you are gonna respect them. And you respect their opinion, and you're willing to listen to them will allow to allow when it comes through obedience to our parents. The ruler man

00:43:04--> 00:43:16

mentioned a very good example a very good principle here. They said they said well, insana thought Well, today he he raised in Mercia, what in Canada first?

00:43:17--> 00:43:41

About the parents were in Canada fancy painting. Where the female fee human factor lahoma. Well, Aurora, so they are giving us some guidelines because then from the Quran and the Sunnah, about what kind of what is in obedience, when you need to obey you are we have to, actually you have to obey your parents, listen to them, and when you don't have to listen.

00:43:42--> 00:43:47

So they said the person is obliged to obey his parents in matters

00:43:48--> 00:43:50

often that are not a sin.

00:43:51--> 00:44:04

And he cannot disobey Allah subhanaw taala while we're obeying them, even if we are they are sinful people, and your parents are not praying. They are not. They are sinful people.

00:44:05--> 00:44:20

They are not good practicing Muslims. You need to obey them. But there are two conditions. What are the conditions, we said in matches, and this has to do with matters that are beneficial for them. They need help

00:44:21--> 00:44:23

with something that is beneficial for them

00:44:24--> 00:44:26

and not harmful for you.

00:44:27--> 00:44:42

They're not asking you for something difficult, you know, spend money on you or money that you cannot afford. They ask you for a favor, for example, something that is beneficial for them. And it doesn't harm you here you have to obey your parents. You have to listen to them.

00:44:43--> 00:44:49

So we're not talking about religious matters here and your father is telling you Hey, you need to pray for your own time. This is out of the question.

00:44:51--> 00:44:59

Because this is obvious will allow my uranga right. If your father tells you, you need to wake up for Salah to visit me You can

00:45:00--> 00:45:36

You if you don't listen to him you'll be disobeying room first of all, Allah subhanho wa Taala. And secondly, you are not listening to your Father who is concerned about you He wants you to pray for sure on time. So we're not talking about these methods all sudden you need to pray a doctor you need to pray to her you need to say the truth you need to have, you know, keep good company with people, you need to be humble. So they're asking you to do something good. To follow the core and follow the sun. Now, we're not talking about these issues. We are talking about issues that are confusing source of confusion. They are confusing to people who don't listen to me the parents here are not

00:45:36--> 00:45:46

they're not clear. They're not obvious. They're not talking to you, to you about Salah about Zakat about Hajj about they're talking about something, for example, a matter of this

00:45:48--> 00:46:27

worldly affair or worldly matter, they need some money, they need help with something, if he wants you to do something, and it doesn't harm you, it is beneficial for them, and it doesn't harm you. So here you need to listen to them. Otherwise, you can have a debate with your parents. And you cannot you can argue with you, you can refuse or have express your different your your views in an in a very polite way. Well Lota Allah Allah. So Ibrahim la sala, when talking to his father, he used the power of word of reason and the power of knowledge

00:46:29--> 00:47:03

to debate with his father, so he told him, why do you worship that which does not he does not see and doesn't benefit you at all. So he is now inviting him to what he is his common sense. This is a stone, it doesn't help you in any way. It doesn't see it doesn't talk. Why are you worshiping this this thing? And then at the end, the next I said, Yeah, Betty, in the project any minute me mail me, Attica, Attica Serato. savvy. And this is another difficult matter here. Because he's telling you his father,

00:47:04--> 00:47:12

or my father, oh, my dear father, indeed, there has come to me and knowledge of knowledge, that which has not come to you.

00:47:14--> 00:47:20

So follow me. So the son is telling to his dad, follow me. It's a very difficult matter a

00:47:22--> 00:47:23

big problem.

00:47:24--> 00:47:26

But this is the truth.

00:47:27--> 00:47:45

You know, this is what happened to you, Brian, we received revelation from Allah, he received Ye, Ibrahim knows that this is the only way of salvation is to believe in Allah subhanho wa Taala maintain to heat and follow the path of you know, monotheism, he cannot keep quiet about it.

00:47:46--> 00:47:51

And he has to convey this message and it has to be conveyed, it has to be conveyed in the best way.

00:47:52--> 00:48:17

And where many parents find it difficult to admit that their own child, you know, have received more knowledge and skills. They have spent time raising him, teaching him or teaching her. And now the end is assuming the position of a teacher. He's telling them what to do, or telling them what is right. And what is wrong.

00:48:18--> 00:48:55

Is it possible? Can it be accepted? So the Quran is telling us Yes, it's possible. And the story of Ibrahim alayhis salam is a good example. And the School of Life will tell you it's possible. There are methods and children who became highly educated. And they had to teach their parents at an old age. They told them what is wrong, what is right. But we have to do it in the best way. This is the this is the magic word here. The approach is very important. Because Ibrahim alayhis salam did not focus on the ignorance of his father even though we know that his father was ignorant. If you look at you finished at

00:48:57--> 00:49:04

Abraham's father was very harsh with him. He said I will Sonia if you don't keep quiet, I will stone you get out from my house.

00:49:06--> 00:49:18

That was the reaction of his father, right? But Ibraheem alehissalaam did not focus on the ignorance of his father. He didn't tell him, you know, you are an ignorant person. You don't know what you're talking about. He didn't go to school.

00:49:20--> 00:49:25

didn't grow up in this society. He didn't know what we are going through

00:49:26--> 00:49:39

you because you came from a different culture or entertainment. So Brian is lm is telling his father here that this is telling him about facts, simple facts. He's not being judgmental. He's not trying to be

00:49:40--> 00:49:47

he was not judgmental at all. He's not telling you you're ignorant you are this is this. This is, this is what I received from Allah

00:49:48--> 00:49:58

laka j and E mineral India fit in a jar and Himalayan Allah Subhana Allah revealed this knowledge to me, and they have no choice I have to convey this message to you

00:49:59--> 00:49:59

because the last time

00:50:00--> 00:50:00

Allah says

00:50:02--> 00:50:07

in Surah two Shara and there are theoretical akabane.

00:50:08--> 00:50:34

And they warn you the members of your own family. And this is what we are supposed to do we start with our the members of our own family and our This was Abraham is doing it started with his father. So you cannot leave your family in dark. You know, you know the you leave your own family members, and you start inviting people, people will look at your family and say, you know, you should start with your family members. If you're doing that, oh,

00:50:36--> 00:50:57

this makes sense. I mean, as you start, but you can do that a lot. But sometimes, you know, sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn't work. We have the example of your brain with his father, we have the example of new with his son. This is the opposite. Here the father is a great messenger of Allah subhana wa tada Muhammad a sinner. And one of his children decided to,

00:50:58--> 00:51:05

to stay as a Muslim, he did not believe in Allah subhanaw taala, he had four sons, three of them believed in the message of nor La Silla.

00:51:07--> 00:51:10

Yeah, fifth, and ham and Sam.

00:51:11--> 00:51:22

These are three sons. But one of them decided the fourth one decided to not to believe in the in the mission of his father and not to believe in the message of his father. And he died as

00:51:23--> 00:51:25

he died as a cover.

00:51:26--> 00:51:41

So this is another example if we have time movie, maybe we may talk about it. But I think this story of Abraham is, it's a it's a beautiful example, when it comes to this kind of relationship between parents and children. And they call a generation gap.

00:51:42--> 00:52:22

The way two generations interact with each other, and they talk to each other. So if the son got some knowledge, he was blessed with this knowledge. And he thinks so he believes that he's on the right path. He's following the Quran and the Sunnah. He has the right, this is the conclusion of my, my, what I'm trying to say here is in conclusion, he has the right you have the right to invite your parents, you should actually invite your parents, family members, if they are not, if you believe that they are not praying, they're not following the right path. They're following a different ideology. But you have to be you have to do it with respect. You do it with, with manners with good

00:52:22--> 00:53:07

manners. You don't judge your parents, you don't hurt their feelings. You don't try to attack them. So Abraham was not attacking his father at all. It was just explaining, asking him questions and explaining it to him, that he got the knowledge that he himself did not receive. And then he told him Yeah, but he lashed out with the shaper in Shavasana. Can many I see? Oh, my dear father, do not worship Satan. Indeed, shaitan has ever been to the Most Merciful, disobedient, and their own mid said Why is why was Ibrahim Allah 17 in his father that you are worshipping shaper, when he was not in reality worshipping Satan, was he worshipping Satan? He was worshiping was worshipping idols. So

00:53:07--> 00:53:33

why is he talking about Jaipur? They said the owner they said but everyone who disobeys Allah subhanaw taala, or makes chick, actually in reality is listening to Shay thought following the path of shaitaan or worshipping Satan. And actually it was, you know, what shaitan his knowledge about JSON, I think was found in every, in every generation, we're allowed to add Adam, because who face chayton

00:53:34--> 00:53:35

in day one,

00:53:36--> 00:54:01

Adam, Adam Madison and Hawa. And I think I will latch on to Adam Adam, for sure pass this knowledge to his children, and his children pass this knowledge to their children and so on. So human beings have known about the evil parts of shape throughout generations. That's why I mentioned when Ibrahim alayhis salam is talking to his father about JSON, we assume that his father got some knowledge about JSON.

00:54:03--> 00:54:35

So he's trying to tell him that actually you are not worshipping these stones, it is shaitan who is who are you are the victim of his of his evil plots the victim of Satan's evil plot, this is the reality. You are not worshipping these idols, you are worshipping Satan himself. And here it becomes you're trying to, you know, to bring to his attention, the greatness or the seriousness of his of his practices. of his ways. This is what you are doing.

00:54:37--> 00:54:43

And that's why that's why when we go to hatchett one when we go to Hajj, one of the best

00:54:44--> 00:54:45

acts of worship

00:54:46--> 00:54:59

is to throw in hajj through those stones. And many people do not realize they don't know the wisdom or the beauty actually of this act and they become very angry in the start.

00:55:00--> 00:55:23

Things shaytan is not there. It's very symbolic. What is this? What is the exploit? What is the wisdom of this, this act of worship, you're one, you're making the statement by doing this, because this is the place shaitan came whenever I salamati to obey Allah, Allah, Allah, Allah fulfill the command of Allah subhanho wa Taala and sacrifice his,

00:55:25--> 00:55:32

his son. And this is what this is, that was a great test for River Valley Salah, imagine sacrificing your own son,

00:55:34--> 00:55:50

your own sign your own son, your own daughter. With this, you take a knife and sacrifice your son. So that was the level of obedience and submission that Abraham and a solemn had, he was willing to do that. She

00:55:51--> 00:55:59

knew that Abraham is willing to do that that means this man will be will be successful, the most successful person on earth.

00:56:00--> 00:56:27

Because you are showing here he was showing here the highest level of submission to the will of God. So I am willing to submit, say, this is what you want me to do here Allah, I'm willing to sacrifice my son, if this is what you want, for you sake. So that means everything is out of my heart. There is nothing beside you. In my heart inside my heart. This was Brian, this is the this is the statement Ibrahim was trying to make.

00:56:29--> 00:56:52

And he was serious about it, Ibrahim Allah. And Allah knew that Abraham is serious about it, and he's willing to do it. And that was one of his tests. Because that another difficult test when he had to leave, first of all before that, when he had to leave his own wife and his own child in the middle of the desert, in a barren Valley, plantlets Valley.

00:56:53--> 00:57:06

There was no cargo, no water, no food, no people there, and he was commanded to do it. And he did it at a center. But alas, rewarded him and his family was blessed with Zamzam.

00:57:08--> 00:57:13

For the last 4000 years, people have been drinking Zamzam and it's still they're

00:57:14--> 00:57:16

still there, Samsung, to me is a miracle.

00:57:17--> 00:57:27

To the you know, look at the location of the Kaaba and the place of Zamzam and the mountains that are surrounding that place. It should be a dirty water, but it is pure water.

00:57:28--> 00:57:35

No one got affected. I don't know anyone who said they want to make a mate has your camera and brought Zim and I got sick.

00:57:36--> 00:58:13

I felt that the water was not a pure something. I've never heard the statement in my life. Anyway, we're talking about Abraham Madison. So in that moment, Ibrahim La Silla shaytani knew that Ibrahim is you know is about to offer great or making a great act of favor that almost had showing his submission to Allah. So, he wanted he at that time he wanted to make was was trying to make worse was trying to stop Ibrahim from the Vegas hotel. So when we go to Hajj and we do we throw these stones, these you know, Paul's Chetan is not there.

00:58:14--> 00:58:22

But the message the statement you are making you make all the Hajaj make your Allah I am dissociating

00:58:23--> 00:58:34

myself from shaitan and making complete dissociation with shaytaan. I'm separating myself from shaytan and coming back to you.

00:58:35--> 00:59:03

Coming back to you Allah and submitting my will to you, your Allah and that's why aerosol assassin himself and has Unum abroad like Salah who jazza on Illa agenda he said that the perfect Hajj, mcgroove Hajj that is that has no sins no mercy and no disobedience and it has no reward except Jenna there is no reward for it except gentleness Allah subhanaw taala Angelina mean allysian

00:59:04--> 00:59:46

so in the next is Ibrahim Elisa Lam said yeah, Betty in the a half a year masakadza bone, mineral man, Fatah. Khun Alicia Pani Walia in the ahafo, I am worried about you, I am worried about your safety is what I'm worried about. I'm not debating with you for the sake of, you know, arguing or debating or because I want to, you know, to prove that time, right and you are wrong, because this is something that, you know, that happens is very common people with, you have a debate with them. And you think of all the things that you are trying to prove yourself, right, and that's it. This is your purpose, this is your attention. So Ibrahim alayhis salam said this, what I'm worried about,

00:59:47--> 01:00:00

I'm worried about your safety. And then he said at the end, of course, as I told you, Abraham's father, he said he told him if you do not desist, I will surely stone you and leave my presence.

01:00:00--> 01:00:03

Get out from here. I don't want to see you. I don't want to live with you.

01:00:04--> 01:00:06

The last

01:00:07--> 01:00:18

statement before leaving Abraham said Sailor Moon Alec, stuff hula carabiner How can I be happier Peace be upon you. I will pray

01:00:19--> 01:00:22

to Allah subhanho wa Taala to my Lord to forgive you.

01:00:23--> 01:01:12

So asking, you know, offering Selim to his father, and promising him that he will keep making, asking Allah subhanaw taala making data for him, asking Allah to forgive his sins. The older man he said he stopped making dirt for his father, after he his father passed away. And he knew that his father passed away as a mushrik. There are some odema that Abraham nslm will actually disassociate himself from his father actually on the Day of Judgment, when he finally will when he will find out that his father will be in Janda Villa hotel. But they said he kept on making up for his father his whole life even though he did not live with him. Because Abraham La Silla left Iraq and he went to

01:01:12--> 01:01:46

Palestine stayed there. Palestine was headquarter, the headquarter of his tower, but he's not moving. He kept moving around in the area. He went to Egypt. He went to Mecca for a couple of times to visit his wife and his, his, his child is married and he said he was going that area in the middle east making Dawa, inviting people to the deen of Allah subhana wa Tada. So we know that he did not live with his father, but he kept making dua for his father Miss Allah subhanaw taala and he will feel canaliculi higher to Allah. Allah Subhana Allah, Allah Allah, Allah Allah