10k Subscriber LIVE Q&A
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Channel: Fatima Barkatulla
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AI Generated Summary ©
The host of the Q Kia Q Kia session discusses the importance of finding answers to questions in the future and provides guidance on the length of time women typically stay in labor. They emphasize the need to educate young Muslim women on Islam and find ways to make their appearance attractive, while acknowledging the cultural acceptance of Islam and avoiding "horigrams." The speaker suggests avoiding washing dishes, washing clothing, and wearing masks to protect one's body and clothes, and emphasizes the importance of personal care and acknowledging that "horigrams are not something that should just be taken, measured, or measured."AI Generated Transcript ©
Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah.
Brothers and sisters Salam alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh. Those of you who have joined me for this live 10,000 subscriber q&a session, could you please just let me know in the chat if you can hear me.
And if you can see me clearly, before we begin.
Alhamdulillah Thank you.
Thank you for that. Okay, so
this is a milestone for this channel Hamdulillah.
This channel was started a few years ago, I believe. And
really, it was a way to preserve and to share
some of the talks that I was giving anyway, you know, so I was giving talks in different settings, I would usually record them as audio talks
on my phone, on my iPhone, or sometimes the organizers would be recording them. And we just wanted a way to, I wanted a way to just be able to share them with more people who could potentially benefit, and in a way to store them as well in somewhere, and YouTube happened to be,
seemed to be the ideal place to do that.
But alhamdulillah, you must have noticed that recently, we've been
trying to have more consistent content, you know, trying to put more things out there that
Alhamdulillah, I've had the opportunity to take part in things like Islamic QA on Islam channel,
some of the shows that we've that I've been involved in, in eemaan channel as well, the actual series. I know a lot of people really enjoyed that series, as well as the raising believers series. And Inshallah, we will continue to increase and also hopefully, increase the quality of the kinds of things that we put forward on this channel, including the topics,
etc. Another really popular feature has been the shorts, I noticed that a lot of sisters or people have just said to me, if I've met them somewhere, you know, they said they've fade particularly like and prefer the shorts. I think that's because that's the trend at the moment, everyone.
I don't think many people have the patience for the longer videos. And sometimes you just want a short, sharp reminder, right or something short, a short idea, just to take with you without having to spend ages
on YouTube.
So I just wanted to first of all, thank you all for that. Does that come along here and thank you for your
support. Thank you for sharing the videos, thank you for, you know, putting them forward. And also viewing them yourselves. And I'm really open to your feedback. So if there's anything that you'd like me to know, if there's a particular topic that you think I should address,
in sha Allah, I'll be making more of a concerted effort to research and then try to address some of those topics.
So, if you do want to give me feedback privately, you can always email me
the email address is contact at Fatima barkatullah.com. That's contact ce o n, t A C T at Fatima barkatullah. You can get the spelling from this YouTube channel and then.com Okay, and of course you can also engage in the chat. Okay. And hamdulillah So,
you've sent lots of questions in I've actually already got a few questions that have come in via Twitter via different platforms, including YouTube itself. You can also use the live chat function yourself and just type in any questions or any issues anything you'd like to have addressed or discussed in this forum. You know, inshallah Sharla. Welcome all of those. I'm going to try and keep this session to
what time is it?
I'm going to try and keep the session to an hour
An hour 15 minutes.
Famous last words, you know, everyone thinks they're going to do an hour. But when we broadcast time seems to pass very quickly. So I'm going to try and keep it until 8:30pm at the latest. Okay, that's 8:30pm here in London.
And I'll just dive in straight to the questions that have been submitted. And I'll keep an eye on the chat as well. So Smilla,
the first question that somebody sent in.
Okay, I'll do those first. And then I'll go to your live questions. And by the way, you can share this stream with anyone you'd like.
And if they have a question, if there's something you know, that they've been wanting to ask about, they can ask here by via the chat.
If I know the answer, I will try to share the answer with you. If I don't know the answer, it will be an interesting thing for me to go and research and look up because I'm always trying to make sure that, you know, first of all, that
people have the answers they need for the things that they want to know about, especially with regards to our deen.
And also, for my own research, my own interest, you know, I'm very interested in the kinds of issues that
affect people.
So I welcome your questions. The first question I've got here is Salam aleikum. When does a woman in labor stop making her Salah
for example,
if she has an induction and induced labor
a C section, and prolonged natural labor?
Okay.
So, I think the general I'm just going to give general
terms or generally, I'm going to give the answer in general terms.
For your specific situation, you might have to ask somebody, right, in whatever stage of labor that you might be in. But the general principle is, you know, if your waters break, so, at towards the end of pregnancy,
when you're at full term full term means the length of time that the doctors expect you to be at when
you would go into a natural labor, okay, if you're at full term or beyond, and your waters break. So that is the sack of fluid that
carries the baby basically, within the womb. When when that sack breaks, waters come out, right?
If your waters break, and you have bleeding, so you see blood
and you have contractions, so you know that you're in labor. In other words, you have strong contractions, you know, the proper contractions of labor.
Coupled with blood coupled, and you know that the waters are broken, then you are in basically your your, your
postnatal bleeding has pretty much started, right? So you don't have to pray. So in other words, if there's blood contractions, and there is, you know, the waters are broken. Now, if you have very strong contractions, you know, you're in labor, you have very strong contractions, your waters are broken.
And there's no blood. Okay, there's been no blood, like not even a little bit,
then you continue to pray. Okay.
So
you would continue to pray? And yes, you might be in pain.
But you would pray in whatever way that you can. You pray in whatever way that you can.
Many women find a lot of comfort in being able to pray during labor because labor doesn't just come suddenly, you know, usually, it can actually come quite suddenly, especially if it's a second child or more. But usually, you know, tech, there's a build up, it's it starts getting stronger and stronger. Until, you know, you get to the end stages where it can be very, very difficult physically.
But as long as there's no blood
you would continue to
Pray, right. And once you
get to a stage where it's too much, it's very difficult. You could pray lying down, you could pray sitting down, lying down, you know, in whatever situation that you're in, you pray just like an ill person, you know, somebody's ill. And their conscious. They don't become exempt from prayer do they, they will continue to pray their five prayers, but certain concessions can be made for them like they can pray lying down, pray sitting down, try to make will do if they can't make will do they would make they are mom, you know. So similarly, in labor depending on your situation.
Some concessions can be made.
If it's too difficult, in one way, you can do it in another way. But you try your best to continue, you do continue to pray until the bleeding starts. So when blood and contractions are together, then you know that now you're in the
you know, the postnatal bleeding period has kind of started. Right.
I hope that answers the question.
For very specific questions, you know that with very specific situations, I think you should ask somebody when you're in that situation and you should ask them one to one you know, rather than online
in Charlotte,
okay, next
somebody sent me a question. Who do you think was the Mujaddid in the last century? Wow. Who do you think was the Majid did in the last century? And why? Okay, so you know, there is a Hadith that
in which the prophets of Allah what He was salam said
that
if the exact translation is something like
the beginning of every
century let me just look it up I don't want to get the wording wrong
okay, it goes
in English
so it's Hadith from
a Buddha would have Buddha would at the beginning of every century Allah was will send to this almost someone who will renew its religious
religious understanding what it says, We will renew it to Deen right.
And so this person is asking me what do I think is the renewer? The Mujaddid
of this Deen in the last century, and why? Okay. Well,
I think
I lean towards the opinion of the scholars who say that
there can be many Majid one, okay, can be many people who are
you know, renewals of the dean. Okay. And there can be renewals of the dean in different spheres, and in different fields.
So there could be somebody who's like Mujaddid. In Dawa, there could be more God doing in establishing Islam. Politically, for example, there could be more God doing in renewing
some aspect of the sunnah or Muslim life that had been forgotten, you know? So I think there can be lots of different modules out the door.
And I've got some quotes here from
Imam at the hobby for example, he said, Rahim Allah.
What I believe concerning this hadith is that the phrase, someone who will renew its religious understanding should be understood as plural, not singular.
So in other words, the word is a man right in the Hadith, that who the person who
someone who is usually translated as someone who, but you're saying it can be some people who write some people who renew the dean.
And he said that entire Holy slum
in tafsir Ibn Cathy
You
actually die when they hire?
Ibn katheer Rahim Allah says a number of scholars said that the correct view is
that this hadith includes every individual scholar in any given age.
Excuse me,
even get the Rahim Allah said a number of scholars said that the correct view is that this hadith includes every individual scholar in any given age who takes on the communal obligation of conveying knowledge from those whom he met of earlier scholars to those whom him who he meets of the coming generation. As it says in the Hadith, narrated via Marcel is NADs and others.
Among successive generations, this knowledge will be transmitted by the trustworthy and honest who will defend it against the distortions of the extremists and the extremists, and the fabrications of the promulgated of falsehood. So those who go
who become excessive in one direction or another.
And then he says this has continued Praise be to Allah until the current time, and we are in the eighth century, he says, Subhan Allah,
even hijab, Allah says, this does not mean that at the turn of every century, there will only be one, rather, it may refer to a group, it may refer to a group. And this is something that makes sense for the fields in which renewal is needed or not limited
to one type, he says, and it is not necessary, and it is not necessarily the case, that all the good qualities required to bring about Taiji deed. This renewal will all be found in a single individual. However, that may be the case with regards to Omar bin Abdulaziz, he says so, he's saying usually you don't find one person who brings renewal of the deen in every single field in every area. But he says actually, except for Omar bin Abdulaziz, he might be the exception because he says For he was in charge of the Ummah at the end
of the first century, and the beginning of the second century,
as he combines all the good attributes and virtues,
and was ahead of others in that regard. Therefore, Ahmed stated that they used to interpret the Hadith as referring to him.
As for those who came after him, for example, a Shafi Muhammad Shafi even though he had many beautiful virtues and attributes, he was not in charge of jihad and establishing justice. So in other words, he's saying I want to bin Abdulaziz he wasn't not just
a scholarly person. He was the Khalifa. He was,
you know, he was in charge of establishing justice. He was in charge of establishing jihad as well. So he was in Magette, did in many areas where he was like one Majid of that era.
But he's saying somebody like Imam Shafi Rahim, Allah
was excellent in areas, but he was not in charge of things like jihad, he wasn't in charge of establishing justice. Therefore, anyone who had some of these attributes and virtues at the beginning of a century, may be among those referred to in the Hadith, whether there are several such people or not. And he says this, in fact, whole body his explanation of sahih al Bukhari, so.
It can be multiple people, it can be different people, some of those who come to mind. I mean, it's it's, Allah knows best, right? Who he regards as people who have truly renewed this theme.
Right.
And again, it doesn't have to be,
you know, one person and it doesn't have to be in every area.
But I would say some of the people in our last century, who have been particularly you could say they they brought about a type of PhD, they brought about a renewal in people's practice of Islam, or in education, Islamic education, or politically, et cetera, et cetera. I think there were many think there were many. And since somebody has asked me,
I don't have an exhaustive list of all of the excellent people, you know,
from our Alma who have existed in the last century, but some
that just come to my mind
are people like,
Chef Yusuf Qaradawi? Okay, in terms of his alleged deed of fake, right, and his trying to make the deen and Islamic law in particular, relevant to modern times, and adaptable to modern times after there was this huge fit Fisher really like a real
what people have called a type of
attack, you know, on the Sharia and dismantling of the Islamic legal systems
in Muslim countries. Sure useful Qaddafi I think he was one of them which edits of the last century, who really tried to bring back bring about a renewal and make Islamic law relevant and adaptable to modern
Muslim countries, especially. And for Muslim minorities, I think, whether you agree with this fifth or not, right, because he's the was sometimes controversial, often controversial, right?
His effort
is unquestionable. You know, his effort is beyond reproach.
And, you know, may Allah subhanaw taala reward him and may Allah forgive all of our scholars for any mistakes they made. You know, scholars have a very difficult job. Sometimes we can be very harsh, in our judgment towards scholars in our
expectations towards scholars, when actually they're human beings. They're people who will make mistakes, they are fallible, and what they're doing is a human effort. And that's why isn't it Allah Subhana Allah, Allah will reward the scholar, the person who makes each they heard and does his best.
Even if he gets the result wrong, even if he gets the answer wrong, if he was sincere, and he does his best,
he will, if he gets the answer, correct, he will get two rewards. If he gets the answer wrong, he will get one reward. Right. So we have to be very careful when we're overly judgmental of scholars. But I think Chef Yusuf al Qaradawi, if you just look at the volume of books that he wrote, the amount of work that he did, you know, and and not just writing books, or writing books is, is a big deal. Especially relevant, useful books, books that are useful to scholars, but also the effort that he put into actually building relationships with different
you know, cross country relationships, establishing alliances setting up scholarly bodies.
There was countless work that he did, masha Allah, so I think you should use fancourt Tao is one of them. I think Schiphol and Bernie was one of them. Rahim Allah, you know, he caused, again, like, some of these figures that I'm gonna mention, you're gonna find them controversial, but
you know, it's very rare to find a figure in history, who's actually done something of value.
That isn't controversial. You can't please everyone. And, like I said, I believe that these individuals did their best in their times. So I think Chahal, Barney, one of the things he did was bring about a tragedy, a renewal of people's
value of Hadith, and also their value and their referral. They're going back to looking for what the authentic son that was, you know,
again, whether you agree with all of his conclusions, or you know, everything about the movement that kind of was attached to him or not,
regardless of that, I think his effort in hadith is a very commendable effort. And I think that what it he definitely did was bring about a movement that caused Muslims to, instead of just taking for granted what their parents had taught them and what culture had taught them.
It forced them to actually go back and say, Well, what did what do the sources actually say? Right?
Sometimes that
It was not a good thing, especially for ordinary when ordinary people who had didn't have a clue about the Sharia went and looked back and tried to interpret the Hadith, etc. But by and large, I think,
I think a lot of good was brought about,
you know, by his through his efforts,
and Allah Subhana Allah knows best.
I think
people like Malcolm X could be regarded as a type of magentic because,
you know, he,
he brought about a renewal of
a huge swathe of peoples of people in America. Their interest in the den and brought them literally brought them to Islam. Right. And it's not just him, there was other people as well, but he was a figurehead. He was definitely a figurehead of that.
Um, I think
I think Dr. Farhat Hashmi. Right, I think she is a type of a person who's caused the pages deep in the in
definitely for the Asian subcontinent. Women in the Asian subcontinent
who would not have considered looking at the Quran, you know, they did not think of the Quran as something that they would want to study or they would want to be interested in, you know, especially middle and upper middle class women in the Indian South Indian subcontinent, Pakistan, India.
I'm not really sure about Bangladesh, but generally in the Indian subcontinent and, and people of Indian origin abroad, right.
She brought about
a type of movement that caused 1000s
if not more, you know, if not 10s of 1000s of women to
open up their grants, and actually study the Quran from cover to cover
and fall in love with the Quran again, you know,
I think that was a type of renewal of the deen
I think Chicama de that was a Mujaddid in Dawa,
you know, in the post colonial era, when Muslims had been, psychologically and ideologically bashed by the colonialists and, you know, in the kind of the inferiority complexes that they had, as a result of
the post colonial era, being impressed by modernity being impressed by the modern world and, you know, the secular Western world.
I think he,
being an English speaking person, brought about a tighter movement of our, you know, and gave Muslims a newfound confidence in rebutting
the Christian missionary efforts to discredit Islam and to impose or promote Christianity. Right.
Yeah, so I think shakaama did that was a Mujaddid. And our, I think,
I think Maududi was on Mujaddid. I think
there were many people who I think were machete dune. I think I said enough.
I think in the Western world, somebody like
Cher, Hamza Yusuf is a Majid
because
I know that he his efforts, especially in the 90s, from, from what I understand,
caused another renewal a huge renewal of Muslim interest in studying the deen, you know, literally
hundreds of us, I believe, left Western countries to come abroad, to study Arabic to realize the heritage that we had that we we didn't realize that we had, the Islamic heritage that we had.
And he gave us this kind of window into that whole Islamic past and the richness of Islamic knowledge. And then in establishing an instance
tuition and seeking to establish an institution based on Islamic ideals, etc. I think that's a type of pledge deed. Right.
And I think
I know that some
scholars have even written articles, or at least one scholar, I know has written an article about
or Wuhan of
Turkey being a Mujaddid of our times, because, you know, when Turkey was,
had sunk into this secularism, right, and it seemed like there was no way out, there was no way out for Turkey. I mean, their language had been decimated. You know, their Turkish language used to be written in Arabic script. But, you know, Ataturk, and everything that came after him.
They dismantled their language, and they couldn't read the gravestones of their own ancestors. Because the language was taint change into a Latin script.
And, of course, hijab was banned. For God's sake, you know, it's fun to live in a Muslim country was no longer a Muslim country. And somebody like or the one came and brought about a type of touched it, it will, it is definitely a tragedy, right, and a renewal of the deen in that country.
So
I think there are many, many
people who we could mention, right. And they might be doing in a particular niche. They might be doing a particular locality.
But the main thing I think, for us to focus on is
what are we doing? What are we doing to be
to cause the renewal of the deen in our times?
Isn't that really more important question? Are we part of the problem in our times? Or are we part of the renewal of the deen the fact that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam told us about this?
It shows that renewal of the DNA is a good thing, obviously, right? renewal of the DNA is a good thing.
So I think the question for us is, are we part of the problem? Or are we part of the solution? Are we causing helping to causes a renewal? Are we backing the people who are causing the renewal? Or are we causing more harm in causing the Muslim ummah to go backwards? Or to be to sync?
I think that's a more important question for us all to reflect on an answer. But yeah, it is definitely very interesting to think about.
We've had some amazing figures, in the last century, many who I haven't even
mentioned, you know, and in different locales in different places. And I'm very proud of the fact that are almost in our mob, we have so many talented people, and we are seeing a type of collective islamic awakening, you know, without doubt, it might be slow, you know, might be very gradual. But we're definitely seeing a type of Islamic Awakening
in sha Allah, and long may it continue.
Onward and upward in sha Allah. Next question.
Um, what steps do we take in raising young Muslim women in the West who are proud of Islam and confident in its framework?
How do we safeguard them from the confusion of academia, woke ideology and its branches, et cetera?
Okay, I think
and Allah knows best I'm speaking from my own experience as a mother and somebody who talks to young people a lot,
especially teenagers, and people at university.
I think
we've got to bring our children up,
explicitly understanding
who Allah is
feeling a strong connection to Allah, understanding
the stories that Allah subhanaw taala has told us in the Quran, you know, the parables the stories that Allah shares with us in the Quran. They are all stories and parables that really build a person's Aqeedah. They build a person's understanding of Islam and the fundamental Islamic beliefs and the Eman increase our Eman right, I think if we spend the first part of our children's lives, helping them to
feel connected to Allah. And that's not. That's not only by telling them by lecturing them now, it's telling them the stories in the Quran making sure they understand and take the lesson from the stories in the Quran. But it's also taking them out in nature,
showing them the world, and giving them an appreciation for where things come from in the natural world. You know, I don't think any child any person who goes out who's ever, you know, done Moon spotting, or, you know, been to a beautiful place and seen a sunset, or he starts to even, and try to understand the stars and astronomy and things like that, and is in touch with nature,
beautiful scenery, Allah's creation, I don't think such a person can fail to be in all of ALLAH SubhanA, Diana's creation, and in all of Allah.
And too many times in our times, we are so disconnected, and we just, and our children are so disconnected from nature, you know, cooped up in a house on a screen. They're basically like,
a type of
Is it a cyborg, or an Android, you know, we have basically their phones and their tablets. And these devices are like an extension of themselves. Right, and they're literally sitting at home.
Lost in these in this fake world. When the real world is out there,
the real world is out there, they're not they're not getting to experience it. So I think we've got to put in the effort to take them out, get them away from those screens, get them into nature.
Let them have a sense of all of Allah Subhanallah Allah's creation, and then make sure they know that stories from the Quran, make sure they pick up the lessons from that. And that takes engagement from you as a parent, it's not going to happen. By chance, it's not going to happen through school, even if your child goes to a Muslim school, in a school is not going to make sure that your child has has a true emotional, strong connection with Allah.
It can help but it's not going to do that work.
What we'll do that work in sha Allah is you spending plenty of time with your child at different stages, whatever is going on in their lives being there, as the background, commentator to their life, you know, somebody who helps them to see whatever is happening in life
with the right mindset.
And we as parents have a huge influence in that, don't we?
So, I think building those foundations is very, very important. I think, discussing with them the challenges and any issues and questions that come up at school.
And addressing those things explicitly not beating around the bush.
Not being politically correct. The time for political correctness is gone. You know, I have moms desperate mom's calling me once in a while. Okay, not very often on Hamdulillah. But once in a while, saying that their daughters are telling them that they want to be a boy.
They want to be a man or they believe that they are a man.
Right? Muslim, practicing Muslim families.
The time for being politically correct is gone. You can't be politically correct with your kids. You got to tell them it like is theirs male versus female? No, boys and girls, boys do not wear girls clothes and girls do not wear boys clothes. You know, maybe when they're very, very little. It doesn't really matter, right? But as they become, as they approach the age of tummies I'm used means the age of about seven, when they can tell the difference between right and wrong.
Right? It can be less than seven even depending on a child and children develop differently. Some children very short very quick.
But the age of 10 years, which is about seven
at that point.
No, you know you're a girl. You don't dress up like a boy. You're a boy you don't dress up like a girl. We'd be clear about what is male and what is female
in a very positive way, right? We help them embrace and understand who they are. We help them to understand.
Allah subhanaw taala has infinite wisdom we can't understand unless Jonathan has infinite wisdom, but we help them to try to understand the wisdom behind some of Allah subhanaw taala has
laws
Why the why behind things, you know, it's not enough just to tell them what to do, they've got to have an appreciation for the why
addressing issues as they arise,
I think for fathers, you can't underestimate your own presence, and the love that you give your daughters, and the impact that that has on their psychology.
You know,
so many sisters and women who are successful, who are happy,
have had
male figures in their lives, and especially their fathers, who were pivotal to that pivotal in building their self esteem. Okay. Now, when I say building self esteem, I don't mean encouraging or helping your child to become self obsessed, okay, or self aggrandizing. Because I think that can also cause problems, of course. But what I mean is to feel secure, to have a secure sense of self, very important, and
fathers have an immense role to play in, in that by giving their daughters attention.
And time, you know, and love.
Okay, also mothers, you know, helping your daughter bit, first of all, being a great role model for your daughter, right? Helping your daughter to understand the hijab, for example, understand the different rulings of Islam, hijab is just one example. Right?
Help them to see what is broken in society.
And the reason why I say that is there's actually a generation of girls who grow up,
not really reflecting very deeply about what is really going on in society, like what people call freedom, is not really freedom, you know, the type of shackles that still exist, or that exist.
Especially in an individualistic
society, such as ours.
I think there's a generation of girls, who don't see that they only see the wider society as being very free, and full of freedom and home, and family life and religion as being restrictive.
But that's because they've got the wrong framing, right? They don't really know what's actually going on out there. They don't, they can't see the hidden things are quite naive, in that sense, often. And so we as parents have got to make sure that they understand what's going on. And sometimes that means showing them the nastiness of the world, yes, or explaining it to them in an age appropriate way.
Because otherwise, they can have a very idealized view of the outside world. And then they contrast that with their life that they've their particular any challenges they're finding in life, or maybe boredom, or whatever it is that they're finding, and that outside life looks very alluring.
Right.
So I think we've got to be that we've got to help them to see what's broken in society, and the solutions and the beauty of Islam. In contrast,
I think also taking your daughters abroad, making sure they go to Muslim majority places as well, going on Umrah, things like that, it really helps to build a person's identity and sense of
belonging, you know,
it's really hard to be a minority, and to always be the odd one out, think we have to appreciate that. And we have to appreciate that. Especially girls, the fact that we observe the hijab,
it means that
that natural sense that a lot of young people have of just wanting to blend in just not wanting to stand out much, you know,
wanting to fit in.
Sometimes that option isn't there for you if you are a Muslim girl growing up in a country where Muslims are a minority.
And so Subhanallah you know, if our daughters go through that, and they are successful and they stay strong, in sha Allah, let them know that the reward for them is greater. Because anytime there's something that you do that is more challenging for the sake of Allah. Of course, the reward be greater too, right.
But we have to realize that we have to realize that day in day
out, our daughters go out there, especially if they're mixing with in like general state schools etc.
Or basically a non, a non Islamic environment. They're constantly feeling like they're going against the grain.
And so we've got to also provide them with settings. First of all, let them know that it's okay to be different.
And there's a beauty in difference as well, you know,
but also let them be in environments where they are the norm,
where they're not always the odd one out. And I think one of the ways to do that is to take them to Muslim countries, take them to visit their family, abroad, etc.
And, of course, bring them up with an Islamic education alongside any other studies that they're doing.
Okay, there's this phenomenon I've noticed of, of girls,
or young people,
suddenly, like not really having discussed or thought about Allah subhanaw taala, and his existence and, you know, different aspects of pizza, and then suddenly being thrown into a philosophy class at a level
and just being thrown by everything that that's taught to them. Because it's, it's not because the philosophy is particularly sophisticated. It's because it's the first time they've ever heard these ideas.
And they've never,
they've never themselves thought about the counter arguments.
We'll never been exposed to them, I would preempt some of those things.
Not all of them, okay, there's no need to address things that haven't arisen.
Except
be able to talk to your child about the existence of Allah be able to talk to your child about their gender roles, all of those elements in a very wise and excellent and compassionate way, but in a rational and robust way, right, and equip them to be able to articulate those things as well. I think all of that is important. May Allah subhana, Allah protect our children. And of course, the daughter of a parent is very, very powerful. The death of a parent is very powerful. So never underestimate the power of your own lab. Next question.
Why do some
FIP schools say organ donation after death is permissible as long as they are being used to save other person's lives?
What is the actual ruling on donation of organs after death? Yeah, there's there are a number of factors from the I believe the Islamic FIP, Council, etc. Let's say that, you know, if somebody has passed away,
and
then, you know, organ donation, especially to save the lives of other
people, you know, on the Muslims, especially, is
makes organ donation.
permissible.
Okay.
And I think when somebody is if somebody is living and they want to donate an organ, I believe there are some
kind of details to that, if it's not, if donating that organ is going to harm that person.
To the extent that obviously, it will end their life and it's not allowed. If it's if donating that organ is going to remove a very intrinsic part of life for them,
then it wouldn't be allowed. So there's certain rules, you have to look into it depending on the specific situation that you're facing. Right.
But yes,
there are a number of factors in that regard.
Okay, I've got a question here. I had a question regarding babies. At what age should we stop changing our children
changing our clothes, or start covering our older in front of children in front of babies?
Okay, so generally, it's the age of discernment, we said to me is the age of 10 years 10 years is like I said, it's not puberty. Puberty is you know, when certain signs come like, for a boy, his voice becomes deeper. hair starts growing pubic hair,
or even beard, hair, you know, hair on the face.
And, or he has his first he has a wet dream, you know, that's one of the science right? Um,
or if they reach the age of 50. And that's puberty, right? For a boy, for a girl, puberty is a period essentially. Or you could say the age of 15. You know, if she hasn't had her period by them
from the age of 15, you can
pretty much consider her to have reached puberty.
But for
before that there is an age called the age of 10 years. Okay, the age of discernment. And it means when a child can,
has the sense to know the difference between right and wrong.
And usually the scholars say about the age of seven. So definitely, by the age of seven, you should not be changing your clothes in front of your child, you know, being in a state of undress in front of your child is not, right. And you should start by that age encouraging them to be more private, because at the age of seven, you know, they should be knocking on the door to come in, if they want to come into your room, they should not you have to train them to knock and wait.
When they're given permission, they can come in, at the age of seven, they shouldn't be sleeping in the same bed as somebody else. Okay, except if they have separate beds or separate coverings. So it's as if they're separated in the bed, right.
And so at the age of seven, certain things kick in, don't they? Now, scholars say that, another rule of thumb you could use is if a child is old enough or clever enough to be able to describe you to other people. Okay. So if you were in a state of undress, and they could describe you, to other people describe that state of undress,
then that means they're old enough for you to now be more careful and not be showing your aura
in front of them.
I think that pretty much explains it.
So when your child is starting to notice, in other words, right, when they're starting to notice nakedness,
when they're able to articulate and explain it or talk about it.
Yes. And definitely, by the age of seven, it's actually before that pretty much that they're clever enough to be able to uni, notice these things.
But the age of seven is a definite cutoff point.
I think
that should
be the point at which you know, that actually, you know, my child is getting a bit more aware now, but curious, her, it's time to start covering in front of them and start encouraging them not to change in front of you as well. You know, of course, there might be times where you have to help them up until they get older, right?
Having a bath and things like that.
But you want to start empowering them to be able to clean themselves, right? So that
by the age of seven, they can start doing that themselves.
Okay.
And the second part of that question is
regarding bridal and baby showers, are they inherently haram? Well, okay to throw
or attend. Thank you. Okay. So I believe a bridal shower is when you have like a party for the bride before she gets married. Is that what a bridal shower is? And I believe a baby shower is when you have a party.
Just give me one second. I need to lift my chair up. Okay.
Okay, so the question is about bridal.
Showers.
Are bridal or baby showers allowed? Are they inherently haram? Or
is it okay to throw or attend them?
As I said, a bridal shower is I think, a party that you have before a wedding, I think for women.
And
so for the bride, and what is a baby shower is a party that you have
in anticipation of your baby being born. And people usually bring gifts and you know, it's just like a celebration of the fact that you're gonna have a baby in and of themselves. Those are not haram things to do, you know?
Because they're not attached to any religious element
and all
So they're not like a recurring annual thing, right? They are
a party for a cause for an occasion. Now,
with regards to baby showers
I would say, instead of having a baby shower, why don't you have an app for your car.
So an epic a party, which is basically once the baby is born, sometime after the baby is born, you don't have to do it immediately. Because sometimes it's hard to do that. But as soon as you can have a party, you know,
we usually make a sacrifice, don't we,
for a pika to sheep.
If you have a boy, one cheap for a girl, and you sacrifice that you
have that meat cooked, you know, into a pullout, or whatever it is that you want, and have a party where you feed people that food and you invite them and then they can bring you gifts. Obviously, let other people arrange it as, as a mom, you're probably going to find that hard. But it gives something a joyous occasion for everyone to just meet, to obviously fulfill that sunnah. And then also, to bring gifts and whatever it is that you want, right? That is nice that a birth parent likes and that families love.
I think it's better to put your effort into having an a pika afterwards, then to have a baby shower. And one of the reasons for that
is I've actually seen people who have a baby shower or a very big baby shower, everyone turned up, brought lots of gifts, in anticipation of the birth of a particular baby of a particular sex as well. Right. So basically, if it's a girl's like pink, people just bring pink things. If it's a boy, and they already know, then, you know, everyone brings blue things, usually, and then
sadly,
that person had a stillbirth.
Okay, so their baby passed away,
just before birth, and
then they were left with a house full of
gifts and reminders, you know.
And I think that's
pretty sad. You know, I think that probably made things worse, in a way. So
I would say it's better and it's the sunlight to have a party after the baby's born, right? Have a gathering after the baby's born feed people invite them and in a way when you've just had a baby, it's really nice to have to meet people know to have that opportunity to have your baby celebrated the birth of your baby celebrated and, you know, for people to give to us.
So, yeah, I think it's better to do that, rather than have something before and you don't even know if any inshallah the baby, everything will be fine. But you don't really know what will happen, you know, so
why not wait until afterwards and do it and fulfill the Sunnah of FIFA as well.
And Allah Subhana Allah knows best. Now I will go to your questions in the chat. And I'll only answer the ones that I can.
Okay.
So I think in which age would be the best from an Islamic perspective to send your children to nursery.
I don't think there's a
when you say Islamic perspective,
I can give you my motherly perspective on that one.
Or my perspective, having researched
children and child psychology.
I think the longer a child can stay with their mother, especially and with people who love them, especially in the early years, the better.
Right, so if the longer you can hold off them being looked after by
x, external agencies or, you know, nurseries or child minders, and things like that,
especially for extended periods of time.
I think
that benefits the child, you know, being able to be with their parents with especially with their mother.
If you after the A I think if you read a book, there's a book called raising babies, it's not an Islamic book.
But it's written by a psychologist Steve Biddulph. And one of the things he says in it is that before the age of three, it's not a good idea for children to be looked after by somebody who doesn't love them, who doesn't have natural love for them, you know, like a parent or grandparent cetera
for extended periods of time,
and then he says, after the age of three, it should be not not be for extended periods of time, you know, not this idea of morning till night thing going on, you know, daycare,
not this idea of long periods of time for maybe a few hours, something like this, if if need be, okay.
So I would say make it part time, if you are going to do it, and make it as minimal as possible.
Because these precious years of these years are very precious, and these precious years, you're never going to have them again, it's very intense. I know, it's very intense that period of time.
But it's also very precious.
And the investment you make in that period of time, and if you allow your wife to be able to have that freedom to be able to spend her time with the child with children.
It will pay dividends. No.
So, don't be in a rush. Don't be in a rush.
Hope that makes sense.
And sometimes people use the example of, you know, the fact that children at the time of the Prophet sallallahu, when he was selling were fostered by somebody else, you know, even as babies.
And they say, well, that's like the nursery that's like daycare. But actually, it's not. It's not like daycare.
And I'll tell you why. It's not like daycare,
because the women who used to look after those babies,
who were not the babies, mothers,
they used to breastfeed those babies. Right? They used to breastfeed those babies,
it means they become that baby's mother, right? They become like that baby's mother, they have that same bond, and that same love, or a similar love to the love of our mother, they've literally putting the baby to their breast, you know, and that's literally what babies need physical contact, eye contact, that proper kind of attention and love, as well as the mother's milk or the human milk, basically, right?
It's completely different, it was a completely different system to being looked after in the nursery by a stranger who's paid the minimum wage, you know,
it's a completely different thing. So you cannot equate the two.
If in our times, we had women who are breastfeeding those children and became their foster mothers. In other words, you know, the mothers of Radha as we call them, then that would be different.
That would be different because those children will be getting what they need from those women. But in our times, it's not like that,
you know, so
we got to be more careful. We've got to realize that children need love and the love of somebody who loves you naturally is different to the care of a stranger or somebody who doesn't have natural love for you. You know, it's not the same. There's something different about it.
And it affects the child's development and their brain development.
Okay.
Yes, sir. Hamdulillah 10 10,000 Already
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So I would encourage anyone out there who is watching this or is going to watch this afterwards when we put it up.
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Okay, another sister is asking. I'm British and converted to Islam this year, wearing the hijab Masha Allah may Allah bless you, sister wonderful. May Allah make it easy for you.
colleagues in social work are very critical saying clients forced to wear hijab
won't feel comfortable
cultural appropriation etc.
Oh,
really Subhanallah how to respond?
Um
I think that's really unprofessional of them to say that, you know,
first of all,
that's pretty unprofessional, you know, a person's personal choice and what they do in their personal practice. He's got nothing to do with the clients, you know, if you if what you're doing is legal, if what you're doing is a good thing, and fine, is it's permissible, and it's allowed by the law. What What harm could it bring to a client? And What business is it of a client? In fact, I would say, actually,
people will probably feel more comfortable with you, especially people from ethnic backgrounds, would actually feel more comfortable with you,
being somebody who's observing the job, and they will probably feel more trust towards you. Now, there's a huge problem in especially in the UK, of ethnic minorities, not trusting the authorities, not trusting the police, for example, not trusting social services, etc.
You wearing the hijab actually gives them a signal that
if especially if they're from a Muslim background, that you're
basically like them, right. You know, you have this camaraderie with them, you have this sisterhood with them. So
I think it's the opposite. I think you're adopting the job will make them feel more comfortable. And anyway, it's none of their business. At the end of the day, it's none of their business.
What you choose to do,
right?
I'm assuming that you wear the hijab in a decent way, you're not like,
I don't know. I mean, we have people nowadays, who have blue hair for God's sake, you know, I don't feel particularly comfortable around people with blue hair. But
I see their choice is not harming me in any way. I'm not going to say anything to them, right?
You wearing their job is a beautiful thing. It's a pure thing. Don't allow anything that anyone says to make you feel uncomfortable about it. And like I said, it's none of the business is your choice. cultural appropriation. We don't believe in that nonsense as Muslims. You know,
we when we became Muslim, when our ancestors became Muslim, they adopted the culture of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Yes, they kept Esper aspects of their own cultures that were congruent with Islam. But they changed every element of the culture that was
incongruent with Islam. Right?
They obeyed the prophets, Allah Salam, they operate obeyed Allah. And that became the first consideration. And then they adapted elements of Islam that were allowed to be adapted to their cultures, right? So you see Muslims wearing hijab in different ways, as long as the parts that are supposed to be covered, are covered, is considered valid, right?
So I think
I think you just need to stand your ground. Be quietly confident,
ignore the noise, you know, and if you have to, in a very professional way, let them know that it's inappropriate for them to comment on
your attire. Right.
And that actually, it's not cultural appropriation that becoming a muslim is something that Muslims celebrate. And we encourage and we welcome people to become Muslim and to adopt the Sunnah of the Prophet salallahu Alaihe. Salam and the the culture if you want to call it that of Islam.
So I think yeah,
you might want to have a quiet, send a quiet email to somebody in your department to say, Look, you don't appreciate comments on your attire, and that actually people have got
no business commenting on it
and making you feel uncomfortable.
Okay, another question.
How do people treat you in public when you're wearing hijab versus niqab?
Okay, so most of the time, I don't wear the dip up in public
Okay
I think in the UK, the hijab has become normal,
especially in London in the big cities, observing the hijab, so covering your hair, and being a visible Muslim, you know, covering your body, etc. It's normal. There's areas of London where nobody would bat an eyelid. You know. In fact, in the whole of London, I don't think anyone will do better eyelid if you're wearing if you're observing hijab, in other words, the the scarf and long clothes or a bio, etc.
exposing your face enhance.
And with the niqab, I think, again, there are areas in the big cities where
it's very normal, as well.
But
there are also areas where it's not, and where sisters could feel quite uncomfortable and be made to feel uncomfortable.
So it's definitely harder to wear the niqab than it is to wear just the hijab.
And when you go outside of the cities, I think it's even harder in villages or rural areas. You know? So
I think I've answered your question. How do people treat you in public? When you're wearing hijab versus no cop?
Yeah, and within the club, I think sometimes people feel entitled to
comment, you know, not not really to your face necessarily.
But for example, if I'm on camera like this, and I'm, obviously I'm wearing a niqab
on a video, for example, people will feel
they can attack you for wearing the niqab. Right? And you'll typically have comments from people saying, you know, why are you covering everything, this is not from Islam, or just ignorant comments, people feel that
you wearing a face veil means that you're not not really a full human or something. And so they can talk to you in that way.
So that does happen sometimes. But, you know,
again, we have to, you know, have a phrase, it's called selective deafness.
We all have to exercise selective deafness. Selective deafness means you don't have to, you can choose not to listen and allow every view every thing that comes into your ears, or that you see, to
penetrate your mind, you know, and to actually have some place to stay that you can ignore, you can turn a blind eye to certain types of comments and certain types of commentary.
Okay, another question, I have two kids,
when I'm going somewhere, it's very difficult to wear long hijab and cover my face. Is it a sin? What do I do?
If you can't, if you feel that you can't cover your face due to some, I don't know, danger or something you feel, then at the very least, you should be covering everything except the face and hands.
And you know, wearing loose clothes that are opaque,
not see through and that are not tight, and they are not
full of embellishments themselves.
And do your best to do that, you know, do your best.
That is what is obligatory. At the very, very least.
If you must, you should. If it's too difficult, you should ask somebody to accompany you, if I don't know where you live.
And be careful that it's not just something in your mind. You know, sometimes we think people are thinking things about us, when actually they're not.
We think or you know, shaitan makes us imagine and be scared or something that doesn't really is not really there.
For my master's research, I interviewed so many female convicts.
And one of the questions I would ask them when I was interviewing them is you know, how did you come to Islam? Tell me your story. And it was a great excuse for me to hear their conversion stories. And you'd be surprised at the number of times
sisters would say, I used to see Muslim women wearing hijab. And I really admired them. I secretly admired them. I never told them but I secretly admired them. I grew up with Muslim girls. And they used to wear the hijab, and they seemed so elegant, and then they seem so dignified and so protected. I used to secretly admire them. Okay. So sometimes we have an inferiority complex, we think people are viewing us in a particular way. Okay. And that people viewing us in a particular way is not a reason not to wear the hijab, by the way, it's not a reason not to obey Allah.
Right? If it's the time for prayer, and you've got to pray, and the only place to pray is somewhere where people can see you, you pray.
You don't.
Unless you, you're in a place of real and present danger, right?
If it's just in your mind, that maybe people are gonna judge me, but that's not a reason not to pray, right? We've got to be made of stronger stuff than that. So be careful that you're not just imagining that it's too hot. You know? And, rather than focus on the fact that you're pleasing Allah, that you're obeying Allah and that Allah Subhana Allah will be pleased, and we'll have you back
Oh, yeah, this brother, yes, I actually had your question, written.
Question about speculations, especially in the context of business and markets as compared to horoscopes. So, in one of my previous videos, I said horoscopes, you know, checking your horoscope is haram, right? It's not allowed to do that. And we don't believe in astrology.
Right.
And we shouldn't be checking those things. It's a bit like
what the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam prohibited people from right. So you'd say is going to soothsayers going to people who are psychic, apparently psychics and people who say that they know about the future, etc. Right. And so brothers ask you about speculation. My understanding is that speculation.
So generally, speculation is not allowed, right? Speculation just based on nothing, right. But usually, the speculation that you're speaking of in finance
is based on statistics, isn't it? So if it's probabilistic knowledge, that is based on some kind of statistical evidence and Statistics has a statistical basis to it, you know, is based on trends is based on
information, actual data, then it's not the same as horoscopes, right? It means that it has it's, it's more like probabilistic knowledge, right.
So hope that makes sense.
A person who wants to perform Hajj but is unable to do it,
due to financial problems.
Do you know of any foundation that will help with money so that the person can perform Hajj?
I know that there are some organizations in the UK that help converts to go on Hajj.
I don't know them by name, I could look those up. But
I personally don't know any organizations that help people to go and hedge who have financial problems in general. And you should know about I know it might not be
a nice answer for you. But
if you can't go on Hajj because of financial problems, and I just not obligatory on you. Right, one of the conditions for Hajj to be obligatory upon you is that you have the means to do it. Right.
You have to be able to go there, you have to have the ability to go there and one of the ways of having ability is the means of course the money. So as long as you don't have that money, it's not actually an obligation on you to go on the Hajj. I know that's no comfort because obviously as Muslims we want to we yearn to go on Hajj.
But I just thought I'd let you know that just in case.
But I'm very sorry, I don't personally know of any
organizations or foundations that help people to go on Hajj.
If anyone else does, you could always
leave a comment and maybe help the brother.
Sister Asya is asking is it compulsory to wear niqab as a revert Muslim sister
Okay, there's a difference of opinion record regarding the niqab. Okay, regarding covering the face.
So, the opinion that I follow, I'm just going to share that with you. And that is that the niqab is not obligatory, it's highly recommended. It's a good thing.
It's an it's an act of worship, but something you know, if you do it for the sake of Allah, you're rewarded for it, but that it's not obligatory. Okay. Bye, you don't have to follow my opinion, you don't have to follow the opinion that I follow. I would encourage you to do your own research.
There are scholars who consider it to be obligatory
because of verses of the Quran that they interpret to include the face. Right.
But at the very least, it is
recommended. It's a good thing. You know, so,
of course, I would say to you, if you have the inclination,
the fatherly, you know, you should
wear the niqab, if you can. It's not obligatory, as far as my research goes.
But I would say in general, to all sisters out there. I think all of us should have a niqab in our wardrobe.
Okay. Every Muslim woman should have enough have in her wardrobe. And that doesn't mean she has to wear niqab all the time. But on their time sisters when you're wearing makeup, or something right.
And you're going out those times you should definitely be wearing makeup. Right.
should wear the niqab if you're if you've done something to beautify your face, right? In other words, like if you've if you're wearing makeup, because the whole point of makeup is to enhance
to draw attention, actually, you know, to those features of your face. Right. So I would say, wear the niqab. If you don't wear it all the time, wear it sometimes.
You know, at least wear it sometimes. Maybe when you're working closely with men, you could wear it.
But I actually do encourage sisters, for everyone for all of us to have a niqab in their wardrobe. Because there are times when we should wear it.
Okay.
Why do some fix, say organ donation after this permissible as long as they were? I think we've answered that question.
Okay, you're asking why The reason is that
one of the morality of the Sharia, one of the purposes intents and purposes of the Sharia is preservation of life. Preservation of life. So sometimes, there's a huge shortage of certain organs.
And if we had those organs, human life could be saved.
Like in the UK, for example, there are situations where
you need
a match of an organ, right? Somebody is has some kind of organ failure.
And they need a match and it has to, and usually a person of the same ethnicity or something like this
is more likely to have a match an organ that will match and not be rejected by that person's body.
And so that's why, you know, scholars said, you know, because there is this need, and preservation of life is one of the
intents and purpose of the Sharia. Okay, although we don't like to tamper with the human body, after somebody has died, you know, the ISIL is we don't tamper with with the human body. Once somebody has passed away. We like to be very delicate with it, you know, treat it with great respect and dignity. But because of this need, and the fact that it will save people's lives, and that there is a shortage.
You know, they gave the fatwa that it's allowed to save people's lives.
And of course, it would mean you do minimum tampering with the body
as possible.
So that's kind of the thinking behind it.
Just like a locker and for your daughters, I really appreciate them. I really appreciate your daughters Magdoff for me,
Allah Subhana Allah guides me
Salam o alaikum, in the follow up to your detailed answer to me on Twitter, if my mother,
oh, okay, if my mother disapproves of a Muslim girl on the grounds of nationality and threatens to
Outcast me, never talked to me, can I still marry her?
Yeah, Allah, you're, you're putting such a big responsibility on my head.
Any of,
of telling you whether
you should suffer the risk, your mom's upset and rough.
Yeah, Brother, I will say to you that,
please do your best to bring your mother round, you know, do your best to keep your mum on site.
If at all, if you can, at all do that, then do that.
Try different means.
And I'm afraid I can't really say more than that, you know, I'm not going to say more than that.
Because
it's too great a responsibility to be quite frank.
And I think you have to,
I have to know your situation and a much more personal way than to just be able to say something about it like this, you know,
on the internet,
but I told you the general rule, and the general rule is a man can get married. Without his parent's permission. It's not, it's not obligatory for him to get his parents permission. I'm not encouraging you to do that. But I'm saying that as an adult, as a male, you
can get married. And especially if you feel that you're gonna fall into haram.
And I'm not, that's not just an exaggeration, but you actually feel you will, then, you know, it could even be obligatory for a person like that to get married, but at the same time, okay, you should know that your parents want the best for you.
Even if they're being they seem to be being unreasonable.
If you lose their trust, if you lose that relationship with them, okay?
Just remember, you might regret it.
Because even if you do get married, you're a different country, et cetera. Especially when you have a child etc. You know, you really want your parents around. You need your parents support. You, you need your parents.
But please do your best to try to bring your parents on site. At least one of parents, you know, she can't bring both at least one of them.
And
try in the best manner you know, to plead with your mother, etc, etc. Okay.
And I'm just gonna leave it at that. May Allah subhanaw taala help you in your situation.
But don't take your
even your, your parents unreasonable nurse, if that's a word. Okay.
Don't take it too lightly. Because,
you know, sometimes when we're young, we think certain things look attractive. And they think, and we think they seem really good and positive. And they might be initially.
But sometimes our parents know certain things about us, for example, when it comes to culture, that actually,
later we might come to appreciate. And think you know, what? Yeah, I was a bit hasty in choosing to marry somebody from a different culture. Because it caused because I'm much more cultural than I really think I am, you know, or the clash of culture is too great.
So,
culture is not something that you're supposed to completely disregard. It's something you have to negotiate and be prepared for if you are going to
marry into a different culture and marriage in general is a negotiation, right?
May Allah subhanaw taala help you? I think you should seek advice from
brothers in your area in your locality. And I think you should go and meet your mom and maybe take some someone wiser and more knowledgeable. Do