Mental Health & apostasy
Channel: Ahmad Saleem
File Size: 26.17MB
For those of you that are
connected to any forms of communication that isn't does, we posted for this particular hotbar. And the one before, an unusual thing, we posted the title of the book.
And the purpose for that title, or the purpose that why we posted that title was that the topic was of such importance that we wanted the community to be aware of that title so that people that are struggling with this particular condition can show up to the football and find and seek help. And the topic is none other than mental health. Every single one of us, either is aware of somebody that is struggling with it, or trying to conceal it while struggling with it, or that have been affected in some shape, or form. And this, this type of disease, which is not tangible, it's not a cut on your arm or a broken bone. It is there. But you may look at the person who say mashallah you have
full, you're strong, you got muscles, but then internally, the person may be going through a lot.
Recently, you know, you know, almost a year ago, a very famous community activist sister
involved in masjids, everybody was aware of her, she decided to take her life. Five kids, nobody could imagine that somebody of that community involvement, somebody who was in the face of she was she was there for every single thing that that community needed. And she was the face and the lead volunteer for every single type of activity that community would, you know, attempt to do in the masjid. But despite that, what ends up happening is one day, we lost her.
So today's topic is going to be a little bit rough for some people. And I want it to be raw. Because for us to be able to realize the importance of this topic, we must go through some roughness. And the purpose and the way that I've structured the hotbar is I'm going to take you through a journey
from CR to today. And hopefully we can relate and correlate some incidents where it's very obvious that it's not a phenomenon that we are struggling with today.
It has been around for a while. It's just it has been quite quiet and codified. And now we have a name for it and every type of illness has a name for it. And that's just happening today. But it has been around for a while, once upon a time but also Allah Allahu alayhi wa sallam he was walking and mustard in those days did not have doors. It was open and had a boundary but there was no doors per se and as he's walking from an angle, he gets to see one of those hobbies he is in the masjid. And this is no time to for you to be in the masjid in the middle of the night. So Rasul allah sallallahu Sallam see someone fled when he entered the Masjid. So he finds that it's a woman modeled the Allahu
Allah and he's in there. So and he is sitting on the ground, and his facial expressions are off a person who is in extreme stress and Rasul Allah, He recognizes the state that the sahabi is in and he says and asks and initiate the discussion. And he says, Yeah, Obama,
why are you in the machine when it is not time for Salah?
So he responds back, he said yado sort of lump
sum the law why the sender
lover the lazy matinee movie.
Let's see much person explained that and I'll tell you it says sadness has claimed on to me.
So that's the image basically means that it has like last and it has become like it has become part and parcel of Me.
Well as collect me Do you need and my financial burdens and risk constraints has made life really constricted and heavy for me.
So Rasool allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam What did he tell them? He challenged
You are a Muslim, you have Eman, you read Quran, how can you have this?
No. Many times we find many of the Imams that deny the existence of this are people that do not understand this type of ascension. They will say oh it's not possible Mashallah. You're connected to Quran to ask you do a DA and Mashallah. Everything's gonna be okay.
Man, if we recognize it as a sickness, like if you read the Quran to ask yourself, can you break your arm?
Can you break your neck? Yeah.
Can you get into a car accident and die again? Likewise as mental illnesses and mental sickness and mental health, so rasool Allah says, Shall I not tell you of a DUA?
Shall I not tell you if a dua that will get you out of us?
So what's the guy that he tells him this is a dua that we are required to read every single day in our morning and evening, a job which is Allahumma in the I O do become an alarm me when I was no husband, I seek refuge from sadness hasn't and have anxiety.
So he teaches him that a he recognizes that he has both hands and hasn't he has sat anxiety and depression, but then teaches him that your cure you will have to seek Allah's help. First and foremost, likewise is the case for any medicine, you can take a Tylenol, you can take an Advil, but if Allah does not decide for that Advil to cure you, then it will not because she is only in the hands of Allah subhanaw taala.
Taking care of means is our responsibility. So at that particular moment, he's recognizes the fact that this Sahabi is going through a difficult situation. Similarly, my gyfer was the one he passed away. After being an IV senior and comes back one year later, he passes away. Why does he tell the Sahaba he says the Sahaba take care of the family of Jonathan.
For very they have been inflicted with a calamity. You should bring you home, they're gonna be preoccupied with it. They won't have time to take care of their food and other things. And that's why Rasool allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he took the kids of Jaffa, Allah Juan in his custody while they were recovering and breathing. This is the reason why Islam when the husband dies as a hobby he or she was there as a hobby came to him and said, Your father passed away. She says in the law, he was in 90, you're on your own, then that's how he says your son passed away. She says,
Roger, and then this hand says your brother passed away she says in the law, why 90 Write your own. But then when does hobby said your husband passed away she lost
it she could not hold it anymore.
And then rasool Allah He was witnessing and he said Subhan Allah, the position of a husband, by use the word by that the one that she gave her heart to the position of that person in the heart of the woman.
Another time as a hobbyist she was crying over the grave of her son, the sole allah sallallahu Sallam let her believe she was going through that but then finally she said, Yeah, I'm not Allah or slave woman of Allah. Fear Allah subhanaw taala did she say stay away from me get away from me in a can mean that's the word she used to also Allah Allah Allah, Allah wa salam. What did he say? Don't you know I am nothing. I am the Prophet. How dare you talk to me like that bit of delay you should have here. I'm going to meet Godfrey. He let her brief because he recognized that she hasn't recovered from this anxiety or depression of a loss, which is a real thing in our society, and in
our lives. We can't hide it. Even Allah subhanho wa Taala recognizes that but Rasulullah sallallahu said
when you go through Quran, when Allah subhanaw taala he says what after dinner Allahu Allah says yah, Muhammad Oh prophets of Allah is Allah indeed we know.
I never you will be a percent drunk, that your sudden your chest is constricted, you are feeling an act like constrict meant when your chest BMI a good one, with the words that the kuffar using for you, or you want
whatever the tactics of Islamophobia that were installed by used by the Quraysh it was causing anxiety to Rasul Allah and Allah recognizes that, that you're feeling that your chest is being constricted because of the words of these individuals. We were alone in another Hadees wondering Allah subhanaw taala says
you are going to inflict death on yourself through emotional risk constraints, emotional depression. That means that when somebody he gets into such an emotional storm, that that emotional storm eventually kills him.
Why was it so Lulu having this emotional storm
that is a football on its own? That was because he was worried about the OMA and
that was his biggest worry. What put Rasulullah sallallahu
Did you send them? What would place him in depression? Was the fear that you and it would be here? And would we have our state of Eman? Are we going to have connection with Allah? Are we going to have connection with those one? Those was those were the concerns that would bring depression. But what are the concerns that brings depression and anxiety and mental states, mental illnesses on us are completely different.
And we're going to talk some about that some of some of them today.
Before we do that, to understand
the root cause of why we're having a lot of these issues today in our society, we need to first understand the gravity of what we're dealing with.
What is the gravity of this mental health illnesses? And how is it impacting our society, and the Muslim community, and I'll talk about certain things related to community. So for example, you know, the Canadian stats, they mentioned, that one in every five person is going to be impacted with a form of mental illness in one year, I one in five over here, with an era span, you are going to come through a situation in your life where you're going to have the sickness, it could be in form of anxiety, depression, phobias, multiple forms that it can take. Those are very preliminary early stages, but you will be impacted with it.
And there are signs that you can see in your lives, when you're unable to concentrate, when you're not able to focus on something, when you're always distracted. When you don't feel your heart, you don't find your heart into doing something, those are just high level signs. But we are all going to be impacted in one way or another through the circumstances, our lives. In Canada, the lead the third leading cause of death.
amongst children from the age of 10, to 29, is the suicide rate Suicide is the third leading cause amongst the youth from the age 10 to 29. And 90% of these are directly related to clinical mental illnesses.
The child was showing signs, but nobody was taking care of that. And we'll talk a little bit more about that. And females, ironically, are twice as likely to get this as opposed to men.
for one suicide, so if you were to take somebody committed to committing suicide,
the stats of how that person eventually ends up taking their life or like, is just so crazy. So for every suicide, what they have found, is that the person had at least five self inflicted wounds on their body.
So they went in, they cut themselves, or they hit themselves with a hammer, self inflicted wounds. So for every suicide, successful suicide when somebody takes their lives behind that is, on average, five attempts of at least five attempts of self inflicted wounds. And if you were to guess, how many attempts before he succeeds, it's over 20, between 25 to 35 attempts of suicide, before he finally gets he or she finally gets to pick their mind.
So that means the signs that this child or this person is displaying are very obvious.
But then we are in a state of denial. Because we don't want to call it mental illness. We don't want to call that and we're going to talk about some of the reasons why mental illness is not dealt with within our community specifically. And the reason for that is many times we have attached something called cultural shame to this
you know, cultural changes. Stigma what is going to happen.
From San Juan Channing Carrera, who's going to marry you
know, don't Ebola.
They will put you on drugs. You will be like a zombie. Those are words that the parents and adults would use to tell if the child said you know is having real issues, know how they're gonna know hemmed in a bit and just you know, go and read surah baqarah and Surah Fatiha seven times everything's gonna be okay. Right? We don't do that when she breaks he or she breaks an arm. But we do that for mental illness because what are people going to say? That kicks in and then the child lives in denial. So we make his expressing that he has an issue he or she and then we deny it? No, no, there's no issue. Like what is what is missing in your life, Masha? Allah, Allah has given you a
car, you have a house, you have a dining table, I'm giving you food, best breakfast, we're going having steaks, what is missing in your life? You know, when we were kids, and then you tell them the story.
I used to walk 10 kilometres you know, I didn't have a car you tell all the stories irrelevant?
That's very very that has that anecdotal and it doesn't help
denying that makes it even worse. So they actually found that the people that were at the verge of suicide when they actually interviewed them. They said what propelled you from one attempt to another to commit like So you kept multiple attempts to kill yourself what propelled you? They said every time somebody that I guess everyone hands somebody tonight, what are the Habib's who was talking about this, this incident that happened in in Texas with a sister, he said something and I quote him he's my teacher, you know, she acid and says something so beautiful. He said, that sister did not take his life that did not take her life, because she lost hope and Allah.
She took her life because she lost hope in humanity.
She lost hope that no humans are there to help her.
So her only hope was Allah so she ended up saying, let me take my life and go to the one that I can actually hope that I will have something there for me.
And then what was really sad is if you were go and read the comments that were mentioned, on the story, like you know, on Facebook itself,
the type of comments people were making, I really loved was leaks and as on the hurt
what kind of humanity have we want to note
that somebody due to their pain has decided to take their life?
And we are worried about the fact who's gonna pay to NASA? Is she even allowed is her body even allowed. Can we even do also to her?
This is pinnacle. And there's little words that can describe this type of sentiments from Muslims.
When Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was asked to shroud the leaders of Rafa team the leaders of Morocco you don't even have Kevin.
I believe in Obi even soon. What did Hassan Allah said he's the one who slandered his wife Rasul Allah, his wife, Aisha Allah Whina. When he came he said he we don't have govern Rasul Allah took off his shirt. So going there
he knows he's gonna have to be nosy is not going to be accepted in the eyes of Allah.
Then he even decided to prey on him. Oh my God, Allah monkey don't do that. What is his actions telling us humanity? We are first humans. And sad that we don't feel the pain of the other person.
Next, the number one leading cause amongst the youth in the Muslim these are these are stats for Muslims. The number one leading cause amongst the Muslims is social comparison. That leads most of us to have anxiety and depression.
motional libido No, that person has a sudden became doctor what are you becoming?
What are you going to become? I remember sitting and having lunch at a neurologists house, where design express that he wants to go into fine art and the Son and the daughter, the neurologist in front of everyone on the table rebuked him and he said if you do that, then you will no longer be my son.
This is something I witnessed with my own ears and eyes.
Do you think that child is going to have that person who was 18 at that time? Or 17? Is he going to have any form of mental mental illnesses? Yes. He's not feeling accepted.
Recently, I dealt with a situation in Saskatoon, where a brother where a father very, very rich father decided to cut off all ties from her daughter who was in last year for last year law student because she expressed
her desire to marry a man from Iran from
that person was a international student. And he she called the fathers that I'm interested in marrying her. And he cut her off completely for that.
And then the mother called me.
And then we were we were we were long story short, that sister went into depression because of white social comparisons. Oh, my daughter made that made it to a doctor, how can I marry my daughter there was another sister that came to me in the center right in the center. And she's from the Arab descent. And then what did she tell me? She's like, I'm hungry. Like you know my son is getting married, you know? hamdulillah but you know the system
has existed and Subhan Allah what how are you talking?
Like she was like happy but sad at the same time.
Unlike my son, who was Arab did not choose an Arab.
I, this puts the child and the person in, in, in clinical depression sometimes, if it's not treated,
then this whole cultural gap and identity crisis. So there's a huge difference between the sort of religiosity that we hang on the heads of our children, you know, like, so one parent calling and saying, My daughter doesn't wear hijab.
So what are you going to do? Like, how do you know this? Because I've been following her.
MashAllah waterfree times, the father is like, so free. So and then he has like the whole timetable for Isaac, you know, in the first class, which takes it off. Second, you actually puts it on third class, like he was describing in details.
Right. And many times when you force a child or a daughter or a sister to wear hijab for you, she's not wearing it for Allah subhanaw taala. If she is finding it, a difficult task to put on a hijab,
then forcing hijab on her as a father, how long is that going to last? As long as you lost.
But what is required from the father in that situation is not to put that child into pressure, and then onto your identity, because she's not feeling that.
And then she goes to high school, and everybody's making fun of her. And many times, these are the sisters or these are the type of brothers who eventually ended up having identity crisis and said, you know, we just want to leave this night. Because it'll make sense to me at all.
We inserted these classes over here, and this is not a fusing classes, foundation of atheism, what leads our children to become atheists. You should come in here some of the questions these youth are asking to the chair.
I do not believe in an uncreated Creator.
These are the questions of choice of you know, you the parents that are bringing your children here. These are the questions yesterday I ended a call from Michigan, where the father was talking about the same thing is that my son doesn't believe in Islam. I said, Well, why do you believe in Islam? Because he's like I was born Muslim. My that answer is not acceptable. And Allah subhanaw taala, because Allah says in the Quran, fat lemon,
you must have certainty that Allah is one.
And then when we push this cultural dogma with the cloud and shroud of religion, that our kids get confused.
And they have real issues. And
so be very careful between what is cultural and what is religious, to people marry, a sister walks into the glass office, that office, she walks in, and she says, I am married, I have done. My mother prevents me to go and spend the night with my husband. Why it is not accepted in our culture. It is not
like Oh, sister who told you that?
And then what happens to these kids, they go into this depressive state because they have a right which is being denied for no reason, except that comfort of that parents cultural beliefs and local tag, what will people say, nowadays, online leanness, I followed all martial law.
This is not what we need to be worried about. We need to focus on our children for this very reason. And I'm going to end this one. But this very reason Hamdulillah, we were able to sign an agreement with a certified counseling Muslim counseling center called Honey center. They have agreed to be on site, they have a counseling office over here, where we're going to have mental health specialists, psychotherapist, that will be here at least 10 hours a week. And so if you go to our website, you will be able to get all the information. And Hamdulillah we already had pieces yesterday. And their responsibility Center, which is now is they're going to decipher because not every case can be
handled by a che che
we can do that. So their job is going to be to do triage. When a person comes in, they have a genuine case of clinical depression and stuff, they will treat them because they're certified and licensed and they have religious background. And when they realize that the issue has nothing to do with mental disorders, it's more to do with faith and Eman, and they have to go to jail, then you will pass them on to either shahada exam or over the other.
So change the use of this opportunity for those of you that cannot afford it. And genuinely you can prove that you're not able to afford it and you need it, then that service will be provided to you for free. But for the others the rates and everything are on the website, but it is something that we wanted to offer to the community. Specifically if you are a young person under the age of 30. And you are dealing with any of these situations and you're finding that it's very difficult for you to talk to your parents or to ask to have a lending ear that somebody can listen to you then that would be a very good resource for you to reach out. Go to the website there are numbers there.
Go there Pokhran appointment and you will have them here at least 10 hours a week they'll be here and in shot a lot what? Well the way I see it in the last week were for like the therapist comes in and like line for people that are sitting there she doesn't have any time. So the way it's going I think we might end up actually increasing the thing down the road, but it's a resource that you have please make use of fist
spillover from the low salatu salam ala via Vida NNPS Allah subhanaw taala the two grandsons their ability to understand our deen we asked Allah subhanaw taala to to elevate our Eman. We asked Allah subhanaw taala that he connects us to the true love of rabbits of Allahu alayhi wa sallam, we ask Allah subhanaw taala to the love of prophets of Allah, what do you send them supersedes all other love in our heart? We asked Allah subhanaw taala. The T enables our youth to go through these difficulties that are suffering and maintain their Eman. We asked the last monitor that he maintains are in mind and maintains their health. We asked a lot smarter than he grants the parents ability to
actually recognize the challenges and be the support that the children need to be so they can flourish in their lives. We asked Allah subhanaw taala that he grants the abilities to all the masajid around North America and around the world, this ability to serve the OMA that way they were supposed to be we asked Allah subhanaw taala these machines that were meant to be hospitals for spiritually sick turn into hospitals for spiritually six not clubs for pious people. We asked Allah subhanaw taala that this Masjid over here enables other youth and gives them this empowerment that they're able to lead such causes not only in mustard, but in their local homes and communities so
that the site could be spread. We asked Allah subhanaw taala that Allah gives the authorities the Canadian Health System, the ability and the tofield that they're able to deal with this because they're also struggling with these challenges and it's lack of funding that's there. And in the end we asked Allah subhanaw taala to enables every single one of us to connect with Quran the source of all clay, we asked Allah that He makes us understand Quran in the end I would like to remind you that we are few months away from Ramadan less than two months away. Please make your intentions pure These are the months months of project and Shabbat are the months where you connect with ALLAH
SubhanA wa Tada you increase your recitation of the Quran, you increase your fasting, so that we are better prepared for Ramadan. You had started Allah who are commonly cited there must have been a little bit
of salt, because a lot of
should Allah Shinola?