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The Art of Being a Gentleman Lessons from the Story of Musa (AS)

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Yasir Qadhi

Channel: Yasir Qadhi

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Oh to other, it's specially important for the youth to remain young men in the audience. stay glued to your seat. We're going to introduce you to the concept of being a gentleman through the story of the Prophet Musa alayhis salam, what does it mean to be a true gentleman, and we're going to do a quick Tafseer of Sudoku puzzles verses 21 onwards. It is the only time in the Quran where the story is mentioned. And it is an interaction between two non Muslims which resulted in a marriage so pay attention young men. This is the halal mechanism of interaction that if you do it properly and shallow to Allah, you show what it means to be a young man. So what is the story I'm talking about?

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It is surah Allah sauce that Allah subhanho wa Taala mentions that when Musa fled from Freetown he wandered into the valley of Midian Walla Walla, dama Madeon. He came to the Valley of meridian. What are they you own matter men and naseous phone he found the well of Meridian, he didn't have any money. He didn't have any food. He needed water. So he went to the well, and he found a whole bunch of people surrounding the well Uma, like crowds hustle and bustle. Well, why did the men Dooney him ombre tiny tattoo done. And he found two young ladies that were being repelled away from the crowd. They weren't in the middle of the crowd. They were at a distance underneath the Wellman Dooney him

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so they're a distance away from the well, they're trying to get in but something is repelling them. Notice he is examining the situation. There's nothing wrong with looking around you're seeing male and female what's going on? This is the Shetty doesn't say you walk literally blind two feet, you see what's going on. And he sees two young ladies with their flock and something is repelling them or they're not in the thick of the crowd. So he walks up to them all. Amma Hottel bakoma. He says, What is the matter with you? All them are Hotbot coma. Now here, we see as well, that a non Muharram man is approaching a non Muharram lady and engaging in conversation but the conversation two words.

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Not Can I get your number? Not what's your name? Not let me tell you about myself. He sees a bizarre situation. And he says minimal conversation. What is going on? Why are you here? Ma Hotbot coma? Now? What is what why did he walk up to them? Some arola might say that it was strange to see women in basically a man's arena. And this is definitely a very likely possibility that it's not typical, especially when you have shepherds. And you know people that are have a different, you know, way of interacting and whatnot, you find two young ladies in a crowd full of you know, workers that are jostling and shoving and bringing in It's a strange situation. So he's seeing Is everything okay?

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Can I help out and this shows you it is halal, even in this case. And others mentioned another nokta possibility, which is actually very likely. And that is that. Imagine this scenario, where you have a bunch of young men all jostling and shoving together and you have two ladies in the distance, it is very likely that these men were saying things they shouldn't say teasing, cat calling this is usually very common. You know, when you have a group of, you know, workers, men of this nature, just all coming together. And then you have two ladies of this nature. There might have been some inappropriate back and forth. That's why the ladies are not to do done. They've been repelled by the

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manners of these men. So they're not in the thick of things. So Musa alayhis salam comes between them and the ladies as a defense mechanism. By the way, Musa was massive and huge. Musa was muscular and tall, right? So Musa alayhis salam shows what it means to be a gentleman and essentially protects the ladies from what's going on behind. And he says, Why are you here? You see what's going on? I mean, what you know, mahute bukhoma. So he becomes a protector when he sees the need to protect and these are two strangers. These aren't his kith and kin. He doesn't know them but what's going on is not appropriate could escalate to something more so he says, My Hotbot coma minimal,

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what is your issue and concern? And they replied, Aleta lioness, the Hector use theory ah, they said, the two of them they said, we are not able to fleet feed our goats until the rest of the shepherds leave. And by that time the water is gone. What Abona che Han Kabir and our father is a very weak, elderly man. So they're making an excuse. Why are they in the man's world? Again, this was a gendered world back then. Right? This is not where young ladies come. So they have to explain that. Look, we are here we're not

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In the middle of things, because we can't get in the middle of this crowd, you know what's going to happen if we jump in there, and we're going to have to wait until the majority of the water is gone, nothing will be left. And then to explain, they said, Our father is an elderly person. And the implicit understanding is we can't afford to hire somebody. They didn't say that. But it's understood that we only have one man in the house. And that's a very elderly father. He's physically not capable of walking. He cannot come over here we have taken on the job, generally speaking, yes, it is a man's world in this arena, but there's no alternative. Now the question arises, why would

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they respond to Musa in the first place? He's an edge Nebby, he's a stranger. Why would they even speak up? Our scholars say, the demeanor of Musa alayhis salam, his o'clock, the fact that he defended them in this manner, the fact that he approached them in a manner that clearly gave them comfort. He wasn't staring, lowered gaze, acting in a very, very dignified gentleman manner. he exuded a protection, even though they didn't know him, they offered say, You know what, this is why we are here. By the way, what really makes this whole story interesting. Musa alayhis salam was not yet a prophet.

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This is all happening. When he is not yet a prophet. He is a regular Muslim. And he was raised by his mother. So we can say this is how his mother raised him.

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The clock right here that he is getting his mother, you know the story. We didn't go there today. But you know, the story his mother raised him, you know, the miracle of Allah azza wa jal bringing his mother back to the palace, if at all, and she's the only Muslim or otherwise he would have been a pagan. Allah saved him by putting his mother as his nanny as his nurse, the wet nurse, his mother comes in, and she raises him the only Muslim in the whole palace of paganism, the clock he learned from his mother, we are seeing it here. He's not yet a prophet prophecy is going to come 10 years later, right now, he's a Muslim like me and you and we see the amount of a clap and dignity, these

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two strange ladies to him. They trust him by giving this information away. Our father is elderly and sick. He can't come here. We can't afford they don't say this, but it's understood. We can't afford to hire somebody. That's why we're doing this job. When he hears this story for Southpaw Lahoma. He took the goats and went into the crowd with the other men there. First of all, Homer he's the one who went now He Allah says for SOCO Lahoma, as if to indicate, as if to indicate that his Nia was so pure. There was no motivation of anything other than to help them out. First of all, Lahoma he fed the goats for them. He had no incentive to show off. You know, every young man knows. You can be the

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knight in shining armor right now. Every even older men might notice to him or her just like you and you'll have the opportunity. I shall save the damsel in distress and in the process, spotlight is on me. But Allah, hints fossa Lahoma they had he had no such intention. His intention was pure. He wanted to help innocent people, young ladies whose father is sick. Even though it's so easy to take advantage of that situation. He didn't do so. And he gives them their flock back notice they trust him enough to give them their flock. What could he have done in three minutes such that these two young ladies they take our flock and go away? Imagine how his luck could be the two young ladies who

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come daily to the watering they they come every single day they have to face the tongues, they have to face the catcalls. They have to face the rotation. Now, a strange man comes and they tell him their story. And they say here take our goats. Can you imagine how Musa Elena would be acting to gain the confidence of these two young ladies, the amount of dignity the amount of we call an Arabic his Shma like modesty how he is portraying himself. The young ladies know this is a gentleman and every lady knows the difference between a gentleman and between an evil person and Musa has won their confidence here take our flock first of all Lahoma then he comes back. And then what? Through

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matola. He turns his back on them and walks away.

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And he won amongst us. This is the time, huh? What's your name? You want to meet for dinner later on? Let's grab some coffee. This is the time you have done the favor. She has to repay it right. But Musa knows how sensitive it is. So as soon as the flock come to Wallah, he literally turns his back on them. Because he knows how dangerous this type of situation is. He turned he didn't do it for them. So called Allahumma he didn't do it for himself. Sorry he did it for them. He didn't do it for himself. He did it for

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them he turned his back and he walks away. By the way later on in the story, the girls praise Musa to the Father. And they say that the best person you can hire is a we Yun Amin strong and trustworthy. This indicates from the idea that Musa alayhis salam showed them aptitude and trustworthiness. When he did the job of feeding their goats. He must have done a tactic or a maneuver with his strength to make sure the goats get fed first, and he must have been trustworthy. Of course, he was trustworthy, he gave the goats back and he interacted with them in a manner that showed how trustworthy he was. So when they describe Musa later on to their father, look at the two

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adjectives they use. Musa was a wee strong and Musa was a mean trustworthy. In that three minutes, Musa can demonstrate all of these characteristics number two, Allah Allah will then he turns his back and goes away and he sits under a shade and he makes dua to Allah Subhana Allah to Allah will call the Rabine Dima and Xanthi Lehmann Hidin, fuckhead era, I am for clear, I have nothing. I don't have a house. I don't have a job. I don't have a career. I don't have a wife. I don't have anything. Right. Notice. When Musa himself was in distress. He's running for his life, right? From the biggest superpower in the world. He is literally running from the army of around literally, literally, the

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most superpower empire. And the single person in charge funtown knows him by name and hates his guts. He's fleeing the world. Where is he gonna go? And he has nothing. If anybody had an excuse to be selfish, and not care about other people, it was Musa Neff, CFC. But no, his mother taught him better than this. Because all of this is from his mother right now. There is no God right now. There is no way right now there is no communication, everything he's doing. This is the clock his single mother taught him this is the reality his mother gave him these manners help the poor, even when you're poor, help the one in distress even when you're in distress. So Subhanallah when he helped

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those in distress, Allah relieved his stress. And this is what we learned in the Sharia. In the Hadith, all Muslims who are facing a problem, you want your problem to be solved, solve other people's problems, Allah will solve your problem. We learned this from the story of Musa alayhis salam, you want your problems to be solved, get involved in solving the problems of other people. And Allah subhana wa Taala will solve your problems. And this is actually in the Hadith wala, who founded de mme and Abdul Rahim, Allah will help your problems and can continue to solve them as long as you are helping your brother solve his problems. So how do you do the Prophet SAW Selim and we

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see this in the story of Musa Musa alayhis salam gave to the ladies and he didn't ask them anything, even though if he had done so it would still be done and with a ticket nothing wrong with that. If he had said Dear ladies, I have nothing can you spare a meal? Can you give me some money? If he had done this? It would be halal, nothing wrong, but Subhanallah it's a very sensitive you're a strong young man. These are young ladies. You just be be contented, just do and move on. So he gave them what they needed to do. And then he went to the shade away from them he literally walks away because this is a very dangerous scenario. You are now the knight in shining armor. Their hearts might be

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affected your heart might be affected don't take advantage of it. He turned his back walked away from them and then pray to Allah you hurry up I need some help. Yeah, Rob I am for clear here for clear literally means for clear. I have nothing he literally had nothing. And he said yeah Rob whatever you give me I'm a fucking I need it. Right? So Allah azza wa jal says Fauja to Edo Houma far here means immediately, literally, she went back home, she came back. This is the Allah's answer to his prayer. How quickly Allah answers the prayer, that when you do something for others, Allah will then return the favor unto you so forgot to hit the home item. She understood that one of them

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came back, one of them came back walking with shyness and modesty, she was feeling very shy. Our scholars mentioned when Allah praised the woman who was to become the wife of Musa, he did not describe her beauty. He did not describe her outer garments. He did not describe her length and what not. He described her o'clock with Hyah.

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This was to be the wife of Musa and what was the characteristic that Allah praises from above above the seven heavens? She was a shy lady. She was walking, embarrassed, awkward, right? And again, if you point this out, I mean, please don't take this the wrong way. This is Hello. It's toad.

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We'll be understandable and permissible for there to be feelings in the heart. Nothing's wrong with that, but how one engages with them and how one expresses them. This is where this idea becomes involved clearly Jani This is a very, you know, handsome young man saving the day. It's not true. Now her father's telling her to bring the young man back of course, she's gonna be nervous, she's gonna be you know, and she shows this nervousness. And this nervousness is a sign this awkwardness, this shyness is a sign of iman. This is very politically incorrect to say, but it is what it is, I'm not going to change this idea, because our modern values have changed. One of the most prize worthy

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characteristics of our young sisters should be that of higher, yes, higher is also a masculine trait. Nobody's denying that. But especially amongst women, it becomes even more prized, and that's why Allah praises that in the Quran. So she's embarrassed, she's shy, she cannot look at Musa one of the scholars say she was covering her face with their hand, as she's speaking to him, she's, I'm embarrassed. And she says audit in OB Ruka. My father is calling you notice this is also wisdom. Anytime a young lady has to interact, try to bring in an adult male, even if it's by name, my father is calling you, if she had said, we are calling you it would have been right. But every young man

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knows when you mentioned the father, all of a sudden, you sift those that are serious from those that are players, sisters, I speak to as well listen to this as well. If there is such a scenario and situation where something is in the heart, never ever interact alone. The Father, even by name has to come in. That's very necessary, because it's CIFS. The serious from those that are not serious, in OB DeLuca my father is calling you even though we don't know Maybe she was calling we don't know, maybe the conversation. But you mentioned the father is calling Leah Zika is Rama Socrata Elena so that he can reward you for what you have done. So then Musa and the lady walked

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towards the house. Now, our scholars mentioned, as soon as she walked in front of him, Musa realized this is very awkward. Every again, young man, maybe even older men, you understand there's a lady in front of you, the wind is going to be blowing. You know, it's not appropriate. It's a little struggle for many of us to make sure we're not staring at the situation. Musa understood. So what did he do? He said to her, you walk behind me, and I shall walk forward. And if I'm going in the wrong direction, throw a stone in the direction I should be walking Subhanallah he understood not every man understands, right? You have the lady right in front of you and you're walking behind

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Yanni. It's not a very safe scenario for the gays, right? Musa as a Muslim male not to profit yet. He understands he doesn't want to be in that position. So he says to the lady, he doesn't even tell her tell me even though it is Hana talk, he just spoke with her now. But to minimize, he says, I'll walk. And if the direction is wrong, throw the stone in the direction I should be going a walk in that direction. Subhanallah this shows you the higher and the club of Musa alayhis salam. So he then returns and what goes to the Father. Now I don't want to go into the long details of this controversy. The claim that the father was sure either his Salam Yeah, do you find it in some books?

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But it is completely wrong. I'm sorry, but it is wrong. Chronologically doesn't make any sense. There is no shave at the time where Musa al Islam. I know this is what you have heard. I know it's very common. But it doesn't matter if it's common. It just doesn't make any sense. There's no evidence for this. In fact, it goes against everything we know Shall i is a different era, different time different place. Shipe has nothing to do with Musa alayhis salam is not sure. It was just another man, another man in the town of Medina, in the valley of Medina. So further Majah who then he goes to the Father will Casali Hill cos he tells him the whole story. Surah Al cos sila Hill

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costs us this was close to the apostles. Ha Silent Hill costs us he told him the story, right? What story of his upbringing how Allah saved him how his mother was his where he learned as a clock from he was in the palace. If at our fair, I was trying to kill him. That's why he's here with no money, no job, no career, no wife, nothing. So then all of a sudden light bulbs are going off and everybody else's head, right? We need this guy. So called da Huma, the lady that was going to become his wife, although this document. The Quran is referencing the same lady, the one of the two of them, the one that's going to become his wife. She's the one that's walking back. She's the one that suggests

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again, fathers understand certain feelings are halal. You don't have to criminalize if they're existing in the heart

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It's not anything negative. This is the real world. In the time of Musa we see this you don't think is gonna happen now the point is not the feelings are valid. The point is what we do with those feelings. So the lady the young lady says, Yeah, but this dude who, oh my father, why don't you hire this young man? Why don't you make him somebody that's permanent, you know, in our lives, the father understands what is going on. And so the father says, I have an offer for you. He understands his his daughter in the end of the day, when the daughter is speaking up and saying, I want this young man, you know, to be hired by you. It's understood what's going on. And so the father says, I have

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an offer for you. I have an offer for you. I showed Mary you one of my two daughters again, the same one, I showed him Are you one of my two daughters, if you work for me, 10 Hey, Judge Andy 10 You know, for a unit of time, some say it's a year some say it's 10 months, whatever it might be, right? So Cemani 108 And if you do 10 That is even better for you. And this shows us Subhanallah the Rama of Allah azza wa jal how one small act of feeding goats literally changed the entire life of Musa alayhis salam he didn't have a job a career a wife a roof overhead has he got everything everything so I joke Oh young men go feed some goats water inshallah and then make dua to Allah Zota Okay, or

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you can feed people water as well point is help people out right so she said hire him. Now notice what What words did she use? She said in the higher Minister Jakarta Alka we you Amin. The best person you can hire is the one who's strong and qualified and the one who's trustworthy. Again, I go back to this point. How did she know Musa is kawaii and Musa is Amin, in that five minutes of interaction. And in the walk back to the house, Musa has shown how trustworthy he is. He's not staring at her. He's acting like a gentleman throughout the entire time. If you can act like a gentleman with a lady, you are far more trustworthy with money and with property. If you can be

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trustworthy, where the young lady you can be trustworthy with anything else. And she knows this. And as for Covey, he must have shown his strength when he's feeding the cattle when he's giving the water to the you know, the goats and whatnot. She sees this as a strong and trustworthy man. And she says this is the best person you can hire. And the story goes on. Hold on. So the summary of it is very simple brothers and sisters, there's a lot of talk these days about masculinity and about being a gentleman Subhanallah look at the story of Musa alayhis salam look at how he interacted with a young lady. Look at how he showed the love of the Muslim. Throughout the story from the beginning to

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the end, we noticed a dignified interaction and there was interaction by the way a lot of young men run away and never interact well. I mean, I'm not saying that's wrong but that's not the Musa way as well. When there's a need you must interact when there's a need you speak but with what is minimal mahatva coma two words and when there's a need to help you help out and then you remove yourself from the scene and whatever interaction you do remember Allah subhana wa Tada is watching you. And with this insha Allah to Allah we make dua to Allah that our young men and women they exemplify and embody these o'clock that Allah subhanaw taala protects our youngsters from going left to right in a

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stripe Allah subhanaw taala grants them right your spouse's spouses that will be a comfort of their eyes and a coldness of their heart. We ask Allah subhanaw taala to protect our children from all philosophers from all Zina from all evil things we ask Allah subhana wa Tada to allow our children to grow up to be strong Muslim men and to be a high up filled Muslim women and to find marriage from within our own faith and community and tradition. We ask Allah subhana wa Tada to grant them righteous spouses and to grant them beautiful offspring which Allah will continue to live under Zach Mala Farah said I'm not going to lie about our culture

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