Yasir Qadhi – Can a woman show her hair to a man who has proposed to her Q&A
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Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. Al hamdu. Lillah. Wa Salatu was Salam ala Rasulillah. He was early, he was so heavy woman with a hammer. But today we're going to have our Rapid Round again, that a lot of people appreciated the fact that we have some diversity, that sometimes we do a longer answer, sometimes we do short and sweet. So today will be the Rapid Round as many questions as we can get done in sha Allah Allah. So let us begin, brothers hold on from New Jersey asks that is meditation, as practiced by modern practitioners allowed in the Sharia? Or is there some overlap with rituals of other faiths. He then says that there are many recent studies that acknowledge that
there's a lot of positive results some, it helps in mindfulness and stress and being focused and well being. So the Islamic ruling on meditation as it is practiced in our times.
The answer to this in a nutshell is that there is no doubt that rituals of another faith are not allowed for us to do anything that is inherently a ritual. And therefore, for example, to bow down in front of an idol, for example, to show servitude to another god, or to do anything that is uniquely characteristic of another faith, another Arcada, another religion that is a symbol of their religion. So for example, it would not be allowed for a Muslim to, for example, wear a cross because that is something that indicates faith that is against our faith. So clearly, anything to do with the rituals or the theology or the specific practices of another religion would not be permissible
for us, it would either be haram at the very least, or it would might even audible or be a type of confidential depending on many other factors. At the same time, that is one understanding at the same time, cultures, habits, cuisines of any civilization, the default is that these are permissible and halal. And therefore, how one dresses, the colors of one's dress, the style of one's dress, the eating, that are cuisines that might happen, the language that we speak, our hand gestures, for example, all of these are cultural, and the Sharia did not come to dictate any one culture over any other culture. So this is something we should all know by now, the issue comes there are some
aspects that are somewhat in the middle, there are some things that people do that are perhaps a little bit in rituals, and perhaps a little bit in culture. And therefore we need to in those gray areas, be a little bit more careful and examine what exactly is being asked about in this particular instance, the the type of meditation, or the origins of this practice might, for example, be with certain strands of Buddhism, there is no question that certain, you know, religions have a type of meditation that is ritualistic in nature. Now the question that I'm asking you, is that the type of meditation that you are practicing? Is it something that is completely separate and distinct from
what has originated from another faith? And that is meant to achieve a type of enlightenment? ie it is a spiritual journey for the people who practice it? Is it somehow related to that? Or is it disconnected from that? So if a person sits down before going to work for a few minutes, and just clears his or her mind up and just focuses on the Day plans out? What am I going to be doing, for example, you know, I don't see any problem with that. At the same time, if you're going to adopt a certain posture and start uttering certain rituals in ancient Sanskrit or whatever, then clearly, you have crossed over to something that is ritualistic in nature. And therefore I would put the
question back to you, and ask yourself that when you're doing what you are doing, is there an element of another ritual and other civil or another faith tradition involved? Or is it simply a means of just cleansing your mind and focusing for the day and making sure that you are better, but let's be prepared for the day. And if that is the case, then at some level, we all meditate, like we just take a moment and we can begin our task and whatnot. At some level, every one of us does that. Having said that, I would also say that the Shediac has its own mechanisms that are definitely far better. And this reminds me your question actually reminded me of Ibn Taymiyyah is routine. Ibaka
Yum, the famous student of his visited him in the early morning, and he said that had been Tamia was sitting after fajr for many hours doing his dhikr and his Quran. And then when he finished, he turned around and he said, you know, this is my spiritual food. If I don't get my food for the day, I cannot be productive for the rest of the day. And so we have our own mechanisms and may I suggest to you that early morning is a time that you
should do your Quran and you should do some vicar you should just sit alone cut off from any, you know, noise, any iPhone, anything just literally sit after Slattery Fajr. Do some Quran, do some vicar, and that meditation, quote unquote, will be infinitely better and actually prepare you for the day spiritually and mentally. And that will be something that will be in conformity with the Sunnah, because that is exactly what a Prophet sallallahu Sallam did, that he would sit after surat al Fajr. And he will do his ADKAR. And this was the practice of many of the righteous. So I advise you to do that. Even though as I said, if you simply cleanse your mind and focus and concentrate in
and of itself, you may call it what you will all of us do it at a certain level, and it wouldn't be permitted to do that. And Allah subhanho wa Taala knows best.
The next question that we have is that actually, in a recent lecture I gave, I mentioned in passing, that a lady may show her hair to a man who is interested in proposing to her and I just passed, I just mentioned this in passing, and then moved on. And I received no exaggeration, at least a dozen comments and emails and tweets and whatnot. Like people were very confused. And they wanted to verify did I actually say this or not? So I am asking this question on their behalf multiple people. And so the question is, what may a lady show to a man who is interested in proposing to her who comes to propose to her? And obviously, this is before the Nikka? And in the presence of her
Muslims? Is that may she uncover her hair and show her without her hijab? Or must you wear the hijab? That is the question.
The majority position, when it comes to this issue, is that the one who proposes the man who comes to propose for ladies out or the man who comes interested in a lady's hand, does not occupy any different status than any other non relative, any other non Muharram. And hence, three of the four schools. The Shaffir is the Maliki's and the Hanafis. They say that under no circumstance, I think there's one position in the magic is the syllabus or the chapter is but generally speaking, the default of these three methods is that that lady, a lady who is interested in a man and a man interested a lady that before the Nikka, nothing changes, and therefore she is not allowed to take
off her hijab, in that we're talking about obviously, there is no privacy, we're talking about this clearly. They're not alone. They are sitting, let's say in her parents house, and he comes to propose or he comes to talk to her in a public place. And of course, a Bible by unanimous consensus, really, we should say, or the all of the schools say that the the husband to be and the wife to be, they should, you know, visit or see one another in the presence of their moms. This is something that is encouraged by all the scholars that obviously this is something that is now the other opinion or the other cultural habit of not knowing your wife at all. You don't even know what she
looks like until the marriage night. That is something that is gone. Nobody does that anymore. But there were cultural limitations back in the day, that actually it was not uncommon for a person to get married without even knowing how the spouse looks. The Sunnah came and encouraged that the spouse who should see one another and make sure that there is compatibility because this is a lifelong commitment. So there is no major controversy over this. The issue comes that may she take her hijab off or not. So as I said, the default position of the shaft varies and the Maliki's and the Hanafi is, is that no, she should not and she may not she is not allowed to do that. In the
humble the school, the mature position, or the well known position that Imam Muhammad expertly also said, Is that actually she may take off her hijab if she chooses to do so. And they have a position that advocates that she may appear in front of her Maharani there must be a Madam President, her father, her brother, her other relatives are there she may appear in front of the man interested in her the way that she appears in front of her own Muharram so how she dresses in front of her father in front of her brother. In other words, she's dressing basically normal clothes but maybe her hair is uncovered. You know, maybe you know it's not the full jilbab is not on her. She's wearing let's
say a loose blouse, a loose skirt, or a loose shirt and a loose pant how she would appear in front of her own Muharram Mr. Mohammed basically said it is allowed for her allowed, not required, not necessary, she cannot be forced is her choice, her prerogative if she wants to do so that she may appear in front of the fiance to be in such a manner and they base this on a number of evidences, primarily two The first of them is the Hadith in Abu Dhabi, then we'll study my mind and then others narrated by jabot and Abdullah Radi Allahu Taala and that he
said that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, if one of you proposes for a lady, then if he wishes to or sorry, if one of you proposes to a lady, if he is able to he should look at her in a manner that will allow her to then want to give the proposal okay for in STATA and Yamamura Illa Maya drew who in Annika half and your file, if he can see that which will make him want to propose for her, then let him do that so jabber said are the Allah Allah and that I propose to a lady from the unsought. And I would look at her, basically, now this sounds very, very scary and very freaky to when used to translate it. But it translates that I would hide and look at her without the
knowledge of her basically, until finally I saw her and I wanted to propose it, I proposed and ended up marrying her. Now, what this means is that he would not I would have a spy inside her house, what it means is that he would wait outside the house, and when she would come out, and she would not know that there's a man, you know, that's basically interested in her. So he would look at her. And obviously in our times, this is raising alarm bells and spying and whatnot. So the point is that the the Hannibal or the humblest scholars have taken this incident. And they have said that it is allowed to look at her the way that she would be. So for example, if she were to just come out of
her house, and let's say I don't feed the chickens, whatever it might be, you're hanging the laundry, for example, right? So she's not, you know, dressed in the full jilbab, or whatnot. And Jabra, the Allah one was basically looking at her the way that she might appear in front of her parents or whatnot. And there's also an incident of Ramadan, la palabra de la one in which he proposed to the daughter of it, we thought of the Hola, Juan. And he basically also, you know, looked at more than just basically the jilbab and whatnot. And so they interpret this. So he looked at that which might not normally be apparent when she goes outside, and that which might be apparent
only in front of the Muslims, right. So this is an incident that is then taken that the fact that our mobile app did this, and it really Allah who approved or he knew that this is happening. And so they know that this is something that is allowed for them to do. So based on these and other evidences, the matura, the well known position of the humbly school is that when the man comes to propose, or he's interested in proposing that the lady may choose to opt, it's again, not mandatory, she doesn't have to do this, she may appear in front of him the way that she appears in front of her father and her brother, however, she dresses normally. So that is a decent covering, most of her
body is covered, it's loose clothing, obviously, because in our city, it is not allowed for a lady to appear in front different items in suggestive clothing in extremely tight or skimpy garments, this is not allowed. So she has to dress with some dignity in front of her father and brothers. And so that same level, she has to display if she wants to, in front of somebody, in order to basically, you know, if he wants to marry and she wants him to marry her, so she can then dress up and do this. Now. In fact, some of my own teachers, actually, they they said, and I remember this clearly went back and forth in this issue, some of our students, you know, they wanted to confirm they heard this
from our show, that he literally said that she is allowed to even beautify herself, the way that it would be acceptable or normal. In other words, not in a extremely vulgar manner, but you know, just the basic makeup and whatnot, if she wished to do so she may do so in other words, if she wishes to, you know, show herself to be who she is, Judge regularly speaking with a little bit of makeup and whatnot, and you know, her hair and whatnot, this is allowed for her if, if she wants to do so now, again, this is the minority opinion, it is the humbly or one of the positions of the humbly school, the other three generally do not allow this, nonetheless, the text of the Hadith, and also the
incidents are a number of incidents in the lives of the Sahaba that indicate that this was understood and known to them. And so that's why I said it in passing, without going into all these details. But now that people ask so then this is the position that I hold it is the de facto given in most humbly schools to this day is by scholars of this day as well. And there are evidences in the Quran and the Sunnah in this regard. Nonetheless, if somebody chooses to follow the majority position, that is their prerogative and only Allah azza wa jal knows best.
The next question, brother thorofare, called or Zulfiqar from Detroit, he emails and he asks the age old question about silk ties for men. So now we get to finally the question about silk ties for men. Is it permissible or not?
In response to this, our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam he picked up
Gold and Silver. And he said that these two are permissible for the women of my ummah, and haram for the men of my ummah. And therefore, this is the verdict that has been pretty much accepted by the mainstream in the bulk of Islamic scholarship, that silk and gold are not befitting for a man to wear. And that as our Prophet system said, whoever wears silk in this world shall not wear it in the next life. In other words, any you're going to be deprived of something that is far better, why would you not want the silk of Jannah. And so anybody who immerses himself in the silks and that the reason our scholars say for this, this is the wisdom and not the cause. The wisdom is that it is
effeminate, the wisdom that is not befitting the dignity of a man. So again, the Shetty actually does believe in something called masculinity and femininity, and in our cultures and times. This is a concept that is being discarded and thrown out the window. And we're being told that there's no such thing as masculinity or being a gentleman, and there's no such thing as femininity, they're all you know, constructs. And we don't believe this, we believe there are certain characteristics that are masculine, and certain characteristics that are feminine, and the two of them are complimentary. So the point being that of these characteristics, is that too much? You know, getting involved with
the fineries of this world, is not befitting the dignity of a man that it is not something that looks good on a man to be decorated, top to bottom with gold and with silicone of these things. So our Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam said that this is not allowed for the men of my ummah, that having been said, a concession has been given and what is that concession Hadith in Sahih, Muslim Raghu Rama Rama photography Allah one was giving a whole Toba and he said the Prophet salallahu it he was setting them forbade us to wear silk except for two or three or four fingers except for any actual in one version, he put his hand up and he went like this except for you know, a portion or a
patch or a small bit of silk two or three or four like basically a strip except for this it is allowed. So based on this hadith, the vast majority of scholars actually three of the format hubs, they actually said that a small amount of silk that is used as decoration for example the fringes you see so in those days, so you have to realize that in those days, they didn't have these the capability to do these types of dark garments, all of these different, you know, patterns and weave together no, if they wanted to decorate a garment, they would put a patch on it right so the garment would be a base of one thing and then they would take maybe some silk and maybe the embroidery would
be silk Okay, or maybe the patch would be a design and patched on as silk. So the decorations on the garment. So these days, they have all of this already weaved in you can see you know the exotic patterns for example, on this particular on this particular quarter that I'm wearing, but in those days, they didn't have that. So what did they do, as I said they will take different cloths and they would make the pattern or especially what was the most common is the fringes. That was the most common thing back then the fringes of the the cuffs if you recall it in our days we have the cufflinks right in our days we have that in those days, they would have the brocade and they would
have the sash okay maybe at the bottom of the film as well that was also common at the bottom of the long sober the shirt and also at the ends of the sleeves, they would have maybe patches of silk to make it look dignified or beautiful or whatnot. So over the top set except for two or three or four fingers. So based on this therefore, if there is a small amount of silk you know that's for decoration purposes, that isn't shallow to either acceptable now when it comes to ties, the position that I hold and Allah Azza knows best first and foremost, we have to realize that much of what passes as silk. Today is not actual silk. It might there are actually ties that say 100% silk and
what they mean is 100% synthetic silk because you see actual silk which is prohibited is the silk of the silk worm. So there are plenty of you know polyester or you know, different types of of
cloth or material that are different percentages of cotton and of polyester and whatnot and of wool and so they try to make it feel like silk make it silk like but it is not actual silk, the actual silk that is forbidden is a self that comes from the cocoon of the silkworm and of course that type of silk is extremely expensive and it is laborious and painstaking. You know you have to get 1000s of the cocoons of the silk worm and then make from it basically one garment and it takes a lot of manual labor even machines cannot really do that. So what passes for silk in our times, most of it is not silk. If that is the case, you need to find out by the way when you see the garment and it
says silk
What is it synthetic silk all real. So if it is synthetic silk, it is completely permissible because this is like taking a metal and painting it the color of gold and then saying This is gold, well, it's not gold, you can call it golden it is not gold. And what the Shediac forbids is the actual silk. So realize this, an actual real silk tie would not be sold at your average, you know, places for an average sum is going to be an exorbitant amount of money. And you get plenty of polyester and plenty of good ties that are synthetic silk, and it's not real silk and it looks like so, as for actual silk ties, these the very expensive ties that are the name brands and whatnot. The position
that I hold is that it comes under this exception that honorable photography Allahu Anhu narrated from the professors and that he forbade for a silk except for two or three or four fingers. Now again, some people say oh the the tie at the bottom is more than four fingers. Subhanallah it's not you don't have to be that literalistic The point is that an embellishment or a decoration, that is a strip this is something that is permitted. And this is the position that I hold that a pure silk tie actual silk tie would come under this because it is a strip and it is meant as embellishment. Now somebody says it is a separate strip. The response is that the technicalities here I think are
you're getting lost in the point here. The point is that what is forbidden would be a silk shirt, let's say okay, a silk suit, let's say a silk jacket a complete silk jacket. By the way, if there is a percentage of silk in it, you know a shallow less than 30%. For example, this would be permissible because the 30% a thorough thorough, thorough look at that would be where we get problematic anything less than 30%, it can be overlooked, because the majority would not be silk. But if it is a pure silk tie, in my opinion, it does not come under the prohibition in the first place. Nonetheless, if you felt that it did, it is your prerogative, in which case you follow the other
position and choose other ties in that regard. As for this notion that the tie itself is not allowed because it is a symbol of Christianity with what not this is a myth that has no basis in reality, in the sense that nobody ever wore a tie that was meant to be basically an indication of a theology nobody had has done that and it is not done anymore. So this is complete mythology. So it is completely permissible to dress like the cultures of your time and place as in fact our Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam himself dressed and dressed up in accordance with the culture of his time in place, and I've said talked about this in other lectures, when our Prophet system dressed up,
according to what culture was dressing up. It was the culture of pre Islam. It was the culture of the Arabs that were were existed before the coming of Islam, our Prophet system did not change the cultural statements, he did not bring a Fashion Revolution he did not do that. So when he dressed he dressed like the people of his time, when he dressed up, he dressed up like the people of his time. And this indicates that the default as if no claim says the sooner the real sooner is to dress like your own culture dresses as long as it is halal. In other words, the outer has to be covered. And you know, this material has to be halal and what not otherwise, culturally speaking, you should
conform to your people as much as possible as our Prophet solicit him did. And then also as the OMA has done throughout all of our last 14 centuries, wherever Islam went, the peoples of those lands, when they embraced Islam, they might have modified their garb they might have changed certain things, but in the end, they dressed like their own peoples and that is why the Muslims of Nigeria mashallah they have their colorful, you know, ways that they dress the Muslims of Indonesia dressed the way that they do, right, the Muslims of Afghanistan, the Muslims of Pakistan, they have their dress codings right. Nobody said Oh, that is a haram dress code. So now that Muslims are in western
lands, and Muslims are in America and England and Canada and whatnot, we may dress like the people that we are living amongst completely permissible, but we have to make sure our outer outer is covered, we have to make sure it is loose, etc, etc. And the position that I hold and Allah knows best is that ties are completely permissible even if they're made out of silk because they come under this notion of an embellishment that is a little bit you know, just a strip this is exactly what is the goal of this concession given? Actually, if you look at it the sash that would have been at the bottom of a garment, that sash would probably have more silk than a simple silk tie and it
was overlooked and allowed and so Allah azza wa jal knows best.
The next question we have brother Musa from Singapore mashallah Subotic Allah beautiful country beautiful lander a little bit tighter to move around in but tall buildings and mashallah great cuisine. Brother Musa from Singapore emails stating that for specific reasons he doesn't want to mention that he has made
of his mind to never have children and he wants to get married. Is it permissible for him to get married without informing his wife to be have this intention? Okay, so can he get married without telling the lady that he does not want to have children? The response to this, obviously, we know that marriage is a strongly encouraged sunnah. And it is one of the goals of our Sharia and really, of humanity, and of the goals of marriage is to have family and children and Malou well known Xena to hire to dunya One of the pleasures of this world is to have children. And in fact, it is a natural desire in almost all of mankind, Muslim and non Muslim, you know, doesn't matter, the desire
to have a family and to have children, it is ingrained in us now, you are not telling us the reason which is fine, that's your prerogative, you are saying that you do not want to have children. If you have a medical condition that precludes you from having children, it is obligatory on you, it is wajib on you. This is for male and female, both men and women listen to this carefully. If you cannot have children for a medical or biological reason, you are not allowed to hide this fact, from your future partner, you are worried about who's going to marry me, I guarantee you Insha Allah, Allah, Allah put your trust in Allah, you will find a partner that might have the same issue as you
Subhanallah there might be a man who cannot have children, and a lady might be barren, and she's worried who's going to marry me who's gonna marry me, and so Subhanallah the two of them will be connected together, and they both know that they cannot have children. So you cannot hide this fact, because this is a type of deception, and you're going to deceive your partner, if you do not mention this, this issue. And our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, Whoever deceives us is not other. So it is not allowed for you to hide a medical defect to the medical defector that is problematic to the marriage, and you must tell your spouse to be Now suppose you are medically fine.
But you are not certain Do you want to have children are not you are flirting with the idea for whatever reason you had a bad experience as a child you want to have, you know what not so realize that, you know, you should not be so adamant in this regard, maybe you will change your mind, maybe she will change your mind. Maybe when you're 30. You know, right now you're 2025, maybe when you're 3035, your biological clock will feel differently. So don't be that certain about an opinion that you hold at a certain stage of your life. And if you are fairly certain that you really do not want to have children, but you're biologically normal, what I would advise you to do is to open up to
your spouse to be your fiancee at that time and say, You know what, you know, these are the reasons that I'm not really eager to have children. And you should know that now realize that even you cannot be certain even you do not know how you will feel after 10 years. So you yourself should humble your own opinion, this is if you are medically fit, if you are not medically fit, it is watching for you to say to your wife, to be if you are medically fit, but for whatever reason, psychological reason, you don't want to have children, I myself know of a number of people that they felt this way when they were, you know, in their 20s or whatnot. And then once they got married, and
you know, their biological clock, their maturity, they see everybody else they feel a need in their lives. So I would ask you as well to humble your own self, and to realize maybe you will change your mind. Nonetheless, if it is something that you are fairly certain on, you should not conceal this from your spouse to be but also be humble in your wording. And say, you know, I really am discouraged to have children for such and such reasons. And your wife might say you or your wife to be might say, Don't worry, Inshallah, when we get married, I will convince you otherwise. And she'll feel confident. But even in this case, you should not hide it. Because again, this is a very
important factor of marriage, and the majority of mankind wants to have a child. And so your wife might be eager to have a child very early on. You might say, no, no, no, I want to wait a few years. And it is helpful to wait as you know, maybe in another q&a, we'll talk about this, but birth control is had no problem and to do that for legitimate reasons. So the point being that you should not conceal this intention, if it is a strong intention, if it is just an idea you have, we all have ideas here and there. And there is no need to share everything if it's not going to affect your partner and, you know,
maybe you yourself will change your mind early on. Nonetheless, something that is fairly certain should be shared. And then it is up to her what she wants to do with this knowledge, whether she will try to change your mind whether she will risk it whether she will say I'm not interested in such a husband, but you should not deceive your spouse to be and you should be very clear about your expectations. And this will be better for your marriage. Why would you want to conceal something that might be detrimental? You know, you think that you're going to trap the lady wouldn't know it on the contrary, you're gonna make her miserable. You think that once she's in the marriage, then
everything will be fine. No. Anything both husband and wife to be anything that might be problematic later on should be brought up as early
as possible so that that damage is minimized and that inshallah Tada you can work together to solve that issue and Allah Subhana Allah knows best.
Brother Dalits from Kashmir, emails, masha Allah, I'm very happy we have our Kashmiri brothers and sisters watching May Allah is prompted to make it easy for all of you. And he says that he got married. And now his parents are having issues with his wife. And his parents are strongly pressuring him to divorce. And his parents mentioned that even Omar rhodiola, one was told by his father hon hotdog to divorce his wife, and he ended up divorcing his wife. And so now the parents are bringing this up. And he is saying, is he sinful for not obeying his parents because he wishes to remain with his wife? The response to this is Pamela, where does one begin? This is one of our
biggest issues and problems when it comes to marriage is the inlaws of both sides, sometimes they interfere too much. And parents want to live their dreams through their children not realizing that their children are no longer children, not realizing that two children are now adults, not realizing that they themselves would never have accepted such interference when they were at that age. And this is how to look. This is the bane of humanity. You know, as the saying goes, every you know, mother in law, at one point in time was in fact a daughter in law, right. And yet, when that table's turned, a lot of times, it changes. And the same goes for father as well, that every you know,
father in law was at one point in time a son in law, you know, but Subhanallah This is Allah's clarity and in our, our weakness of humanity. Subhanallah how quickly we forget that when we are in positions of weakness, we think and act differently. When we get to positions of power, we forget, and this is the general rule. It's not just a father in law, mother in law, it's even when it comes to politicians and kings or princes or rich versus poor that we forget how it used to be. And now we get a sense of arrogance and pride and whatnot. So this is our weakness, we ask Allah's forgiveness. Now, the sun is saying that the parents are putting pressure that obedience to the parents is
obligatory. Indeed, obedience to the parents is generally obligatory, no question about that, however, generally, not unconditionally, our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, there is no obedience to a creative being, when it comes to disobeying one of the rights of Allah subhanho wa taala, you have to realize your husband, that now you have the rights of your father and mother, and you have the rights of another lady that you have married, that is called your wife, you cannot ignore any of these rights at the expense of the others, you have to balance all of these rights, you have to balance them, you cannot neglect the rights of your parents, but neither can the rights
of your parents infringe on the rights of your spouse, because each one now has a hack on you, shareholders, even Taymiyah he says in his famous book, the errata famous book of principles of fiction, what he has chosen, and fellow Maxim's he says, it is obligatory on every person to listen to his parents, whenever it does not involve a sin, even if the parents are not righteous. However, listen to Ben Taymiyyah. This is when they command the child or the son to do something that will be beneficial to them and not harmful to him. So when the parents say that we don't have anybody to help us, you know, bring food to our house, you know, it is obligatory for the son or daughter to
figure out how to bring food to them, if they cannot go outside how to take care of them if he's able to do so this becomes watch, because this is a benefit to them, and there's no immediate harm on him. But when the parents when the parents command something that is harmful to the son or daughter in this case, and there's no benefit going back to them immediately. In this case, it is not obligatory, to listen to the parents, the parents are not unconditional. They're not our villa walking gods or whatever they say you must listen to know the parents have a reasonable right of obedience. If it's becomes unreasonable, we do not pay attention to the parents and therefore, if
they are asking for something unreasonable. And generally speaking, generally speaking, the parents getting involved in the marriage is unreasonable. This is the default, this is just the default. There might be some exceptions. Sometimes a spouse is very abusive, and the other spouse doesn't see and the parents and relatives are all saying to the spouse, hey, you need to get out you need to do and you want for whatever reason he or she doesn't see this. So that's a different thing. But the default is that the reasons that the parents have or not, who cares if the parents don't like you know, the spouse is the marriage is going to take place that has taken place there might be children
involved. It's the two that are living together that actually have to deal with the primary repercussions of each other. So if a third party if an uncle and auntie parent comes and says I don't like you know the spouse
Okay, you only visit once a week, once a month, once a year. It's the two of them that have to live together. And therefore, they do not have to listen to the parents in this regard. In fact, as for this issue of Ibn Omar, and I'm going to Hatha Rhodiola one, this is a famous famous incident. Indeed it did happen. But you know, Imam Muhammad, in a humble was asked about this exact issue, that a man came and said that my father wants me to divorce my wife, and my father is quoting Omar about his son had been unwell because it did happen, that would have been a hot tub, you know, had an issue with his daughter in law, and we don't know the details. And even herbal basically was
basically the process of sided with the father and said to divorce here. So we don't know the details of that. But there is no doubt that that reason must have been an Islamic one. Not that I don't like the lady, there must have been an Islamic reason that for whatever reason, Ramana was not seeing the issue at hand, and therefore he was told to divorce when email Muhammad was asked about this exact same scenario, a man came and says, My father is quoting me or Omar, he basically said to him, when you have a father like our mobile hotspot, then you listen to him basically is them paraphrasing, like your father is not limited Mahatama the level of knowledge and Taqwa and Eman
that your father has cannot be is there is no comparison. So when your father becomes a member of no hottub, then you listen to Bob to divorce your wife. Otherwise, if we were to open this door, dear brothers and sisters, no marriage on Earth would remain because it is the default in our human weakness. It is the default Subhanallah that parents are not satisfied with the spouses of their children, even if they have chosen them by the way. Why? Because they think my son deserves better my daughter deserved better. This is their own standard. And he this is human nature, right? Oh, we were better than this. You could have had somebody or she could have had somebody better Subhanallah
it's not your life to live anymore. It's not your life. One of our biggest problems is parents interfering in the marriages of their children, thinking that their children are children, they are no longer children. They are now full fledged adults. Once they are married, they're standing on their feet. It's not your business to interfere. Yes, if there is genuine harm, or an unemployment character or something of this nature, you should explain and explain the reason explain the reason that this is harmful to you to your health, he or she is abusing your he or she is doing something that is not good for Islam, you know going behind your back and doing something that's going to harm
you, etc, etc. Explain your reasons, and then bring other people involved as well. Don't just say I don't like the girl, I don't like the boy, he's not good enough. That's not your business to decide. Now the marriage has taken place and it is their life to live. And therefore, dear brother Talat, you do not have to listen to your parents, when it comes to this issue. It is not obligatory to listen to your parents, when they're asking for that which is unreasonable, or that which is harmful to you and to your other obligations. And Allah subhana wa Tada knows best.
We have
sister, unknown or unknown, asking that she would like to purchase a dog to protect their house because she said she lives in a large house somewhat isolated from other houses. And at times her husband travels for work so she would feel safer having a dog on the property. So firstly, Is this allowed. And secondly, she read a fatwa that even if she were to get a dog, she cannot purchase the dog with money because of a hadith that you cannot purchase the dog with money. So how can she get this dog? And I'm going to add another question here as well. Sister Rena says that she has a special needs child. And the doctors have said that a trained dog would help this child. What is the
ruling on that? So the answer is that we are all familiar that our Prophet sallallahu he said, I'm strongly discouraged owning a dog that is strongly discouraged. And the hadith is Bukhari and Muslim that our Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that whoever acquires a dog or whoever owns a dog that he doesn't need for his cultivation, or you know, for his
sheep that basically shepherding right, so basically, the dog is protecting the the sheep or the dog is protecting the land or something that whoever does not have a dog of that nature. Sorry, whoever acquires a dog, not for those reasons, then every single day, the amount of good deeds, like the level of clear author, the amount of copyright, some have said the characters like the mountain of words, some of the smaller or larger, but basically every single day, a large amount of good deeds will be diminished from the good deeds that he is doing. So basically, we are strongly discouraged. And this is the position of basically the vast majority now. Now, a lot of people obviously this is
not the remember, this is the rapid q&a today. So I'm not going to go into a lot of detail but a lot of people are confused, though.
Observe so cute, I want to have dogs, etc, etc. Look, sometimes we do not understand the wisdom of a Sharia ruling. And sometimes we do. And in this particular case, the max that can be said is that maybe because the saliva of the dog is considered not just by the with only the saliva of the dog that is not just, this is the strongest position as for the body of the dog, the hair of the dog, this is not just but the saliva of the dog, wherever the dog licks, you cannot prey on that, or wearing that if the dog licks anything, you have to take that garment off and wash it, or wear another garment or whatever. And if the dog likes you, you have to wash yourself at that place
before you pray obviously otherwise, before that time, it's not you don't have to immediately go and do that. So the point being that some people say that, why can't we have the dog and the response is Allah knows best really, we do not have a specific reason. Maybe it's because of the images of the saliva, Allah knows best, whatever it might be, whatever the reason might be. The Quran has clearly allowed one category of dogs and that is the dogs of hot hunting. It is explicit in certain Merida that
Allah azza wa jal says in the Quran, why Lemina to Alamo Nima Allameh, Kamala and mocha living in Alamo Mala, that the faculty member I'm second Alec worthless Mullah here today he that the dogs that you have that you have trained to hunt, you may hunt with them, as long as they you mentioned the name of Allah and then you may eat from what they have caught for you. So the Quran is explicit that hunting dogs are allowed, when you have hunting dogs, you will be around them, you will be training them, they will be jumping all over you, they will love you as dogs do. And this is the Quran allows this Okay, so we have to be careful here that, you know, we have to be careful about
not going to extremes when it comes to the issues of dogs, dogs, by their nature are loyal and they're loving. And the fact that you're going to be training a hunting dog means it's more loyal to than to anybody else. And this is expressly allowed in the Quran. So a righteous man can have multiple dogs for hunting, it's not a matter of life and death, it's a matter of just pleasure hunting, you don't have to have hunting dog isn't just a matter of life and death. So the Quran allows a dog for a reason. And the sooner allows it for other reasons. And that is, for example, agricultural, you know, protecting the agriculture, you know, so making sure that it's any predators
that are going to harm the prey, or harm the crops, you know, any animals that come and also the shepherd dog, right, so the person who has a lot of sheep, so the dogs basically help in gathering the sheep or whatnot. And once again, these dogs will be like all the dogs that we know, in our times, like the the loyalty of dogs, the love that the dogs have, they're going to be jumping up and now they're going to be looking the master this is the way that it goes. That's the way that you know, every single dog is under Sharia and the Sunnah allows for that to happen and considers it to be permissible. Now, based on this, a number of Allama have said that this means that anytime there
is not even a hija but there is some benefit, because see, again, hunting dog is not something that is a matter of life and death. I mean, if you really needed to you will go you know, shoot it with a bow and arrow if you want it to, and you don't have to be starving to go and get to a hunting dog, you can have a hunting dog for sports, you can have a hunting dog as just a passion like you just want to it's not something that you have to be dying or a very dire situation. So, if it is allowed for all of this then many aroma and this is the majority position have allowed having dogs for any legitimate need. The famous chef is called Iraqi, he says in the three the famous commentary he has
that our shafr scholars they said that it is allowed to acquire a dog for anybody who wishes to hunt or anybody who wishes to guard vegetation, basically plantations and cultivation or anybody you know, who wishes to use as a shepherd dog. So, these three then he said, Our mother has deferred for any other reason, a fourth reason, for example, to guard the house for example, right and you know, or for, you know, other types of purposes. And some scholars of our men have said it is not allowed because these three are mentioned explicitly. However, the majority said and this is the correct opinion that you make a knowledge about these three and any Hajer anything that is needed, that a
dog can help you with you may acquire a dog for that and the Shaeffer is called a 40 bushel beanie as well. He says that it is allowed to acquire a dog for anybody who will use it to hunt or anybody that will have any type of
protection that is going to be for the cultivation or type of the animals and it was then also allowed to train a puppy or a dog so that he can then be of benefit to the to the master to the to the owner. So all of this is very clear.
and therefore based on this, if you feel that a dog is going to be something that will give you because again, the dog is, in many ways, far better than an alarm, because it has a human, it has a sense when a human is coming, and it's going to bark and scare the person, you know, and it has other benefits as well. And therefore, if you feel that a dog is something that will help you, and definitely the other sister asked about a dog for a child of special needs, there is no question, you know, a seeing dog for a person who cannot see, or a person might have a type of, you know, issue maybe ADHD or whatever it having an animal will make that person calm or whatever it might be,
there is no question that this is more important than a hobby of hunting through the dog. So there's no question that in such a circumstance, dogs would be allowed. And of course, a seeing dog or a dog that is for a special needs child will be inside the house. And therefore all that should be done is there should be one area of the house that is dedicated for the Salah, and the dog should not be going over there. And before you pray, make sure that you're closing your hands or do not have any of the saliva other than that really you should try your best to not have it inside the house for the protection dog but in case you need to and in case there is a hydra for this, make sure that
there is an area that is definitely pure to pray in that and and you will be allowed to have that now the other question that she asked is that she said that she can't she came across a fatwa that even if the dog because apparently she's been reading, the first was an understandably she came across one that said she cannot purchase the dog she must somehow acquire it or train it. And you have heard correctly there is such a fatwa. In fact, this is based on the Hadith of the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam, which is whatever Heidi, that the prophecy is Neha and therminal Kelby he forbade the price of a dog, okay? What does this mean? It means that he considered it to be, he
considered it to be something that should not happen, you should not give money for a dog. This is the interpretation of the majority, that you should not purchase a dog with money. And this is the standard position of a number of schools. This is the position of the Shaffir ease and the humble is the majority position within the school there are dissenting voices. And by the way, every time I give you a school, realize that you will always find within that school one or two or maybe more scholars that are disagreeing on giving you like the default or the main. So the shafr isn't the humble is by and large. They said that they took this literally and they said even if you need one
of these dogs that are allowed, you need to either acquire it from a previous owner that no longer needs it and he cannot sell it to you. Or you need to get an untrained dog as a puppy and train it yourself or have somebody come in pay and train it because you're allowed to pay the trainer. But according to these two schools, you cannot pay for the price of the dog itself. And they again base it on this hadith that he forbade the price of the dog now. The other two schools the Hanafi school they said that the dog is basically an animal that you it's a beneficial animal in other circumstances like all other animals that can be bought and sold. Just because you cannot own a you
know dog doesn't mean you cannot buy, buy and sell for a legitimate reason. And the Maliki's as well. They said that any dog that can be acquired legally can be sold legally as seeing dog or a dog that's a protector dog or any dog that is now trained to do something that actually allows right so whatever the shitty allows, it should be allowed to buy and sell it. That's the Maliki ruling here. And this does seem to be the stronger ruling, especially in light of the Hadith and Sunnah and Insightly as well. There's an authentic hadith that a Prophet sallallahu wasallam Nihon therminal, Kelby illogical, misleading, he forbade the purchase of a dog except for a hunting dog. So the
exception is in the Hadith itself that a hunting dog may be purchased and sold no problem. And therefore, to conclude this question, you may purchase a dog for any legitimate reason not just those two or three mentioned in the Hadith, any reason that is a reason that makes sense that is going to make your life easier for you, seeing dog anything of this nature, a protection dog, anything that will help you in your life and to make it easier, it is permissible to acquire such a dog and it is permissible to purchase such a dog with money as well. The only thing that we said you have to be careful about the issue of the nature of the of the saliva of the dog, and Allah subhanho
wa Taala knows best.
We're on a roll of q&a about animals. Let's just do another animal question here as well. Sister Iran from England says
my cat has been diagnosed with a type of cancer and the vets are saying to euthanize him for his own
own good. I think our sisters perhaps a young sister, she's saying I love him a lot. And I want to be with him in Jannah. But I also want what is best for him. So am I allowed to euthanize him? And will I be with my cat in Jannah? So our sister Iran is asking the painful question of euthanization. And then the theological question about Jen and pets in Jana. The response to this question is that it is completely forbidden in Islam to torture animals for no reason. It is haram. It is sinful to torture animals for no reason. We all know the Hadith of the lady who went to jahannam because she starved her cat to death for no reason other than she was a nasty person, okay. And our Prophet
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam cursed the one who tortures an animal. Our Prophet sallallahu sallam said that anyone who takes an animal as a target practice, this is something that is sinful and haram, we do not tie up an animal like it is done or even like is done in some countries, they do a bull fight and they, you know, kill the animal for entertainment. This is completely haram and it is one of the major sins of Islam and our Prophet sallallahu wasallam said hadith is a necessity, that whoever kills even a small chickens, little bird, even a small bird, or much less a bigger animal without just cause Allah subhanho wa Taala will question him on the day of judgment about that is a
threat that he will have to answer to Allah directly for killing an animal without any just cause. They said, O Messenger of Allah, what is it just cause he says that, if he wants to eat an animal, he may sacrifice it, and then you know, eat it, he should not just kill it, and then let it on the side of the road for entertainment, that's not something that is allowed to do. So the hadith is very clear that any animal that you're going to kill, there must be a reason to kill it right? Based on this, you are saying that your cat is basically suffering is going to die very slow and miserable death because of cancer, and the doctors are saying to euthanize it. In this case, there is a reason
you are not torturing, you are not wanting to inflict pain. The sanctity of an animal is not like the sanctity of a human. This is the key point here right? We are not allowed to use this ruling on a human being because that is murder. A human's life is not the same in the eyes of Allah is that of an animal, we do not bring about life and death for human beings, we leave it to Allah subhanho wa taala, there is no mercy killing when it comes to human beings. However, when it comes to animals, they do not occupy the same level of Kurama of sanctity of nobility, as that of human beings. And if the owner of the animal out of mercy for the animal wishes to get rid of the misery of the animal
and take the life of the animal, then the Sharia or I should say the majority of scholars give that right I know there's always dissenting voices, but the majority of scholars would give that right because it is the right of the animal owner to take the life of the animal for illegitimate cause our chakra attainment, he said in his fatawa, that an animal if it becomes sick, and it is not one of those animals that you're allowed to eat, let's say a donkey, and you are not thinking that it's going to be cured. There is no sin if you kill the animal, because to keep the animal alive is actually spending extra time and money and it's going to be painful to the animal. There's no point
in doing that. So if an animal is killed, that is terminally sick, there is no sin in this and as for the animal that can be eaten, then it is permissible to actually expedite Of course in this case, obviously in the cow is slightly sick or whatnot, you will expedite and then eat the animal as long as the meat is not going to be obviously spoiled rotten because of that disease. And of course other scholars as well. The famous Maddox Maliki scholar, a dead deer, he says in a shot of the Masada hurry, he said that it is allowed to sacrifice that which is not eaten such as a donkey or a mule. If it falls sick and it is about to die, then it is allowed to do that. In fact, he says it is
encouraged to do that in order to save the pain on that animal. This is a classical scholar in you know, medieval Islam. And he is saying that when the animal is sick and it's about to die, it's in pain. It is recommended to get it out of his misery and to expedite this process. And so in sha Allah Allah, you are encouraged in this case, the doctors have said that it has cancer
So you are encouraged in this case to eliminate it from his cancer and you know these days they have such a humane way of euthanizing. It's not like in those days in those days it was a knife and that's how they would get rid of it. In these days. It's much more humane and the animal not feel any pain. And as for your question about Jana, dear sister in Islam, our young sister in Islam, you work to get to Jana and inshallah when you are in Jana Lahoma Yasha una fi ha they will have whatever they want in Jana. So all of your desires and all of your hopes and all of your wishes will be satisfied in Jana. And this animal of yours will be with you. The goal is we have to make it to
gender we have to work to to to get there. May Allah subhana wa Tada make us of the people of Jana. And with this we come to the conclusion of today's q&a, and we'll continue Sharla next week Zachman LaFell salaam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato what Gorillaz fi fee a Yamin
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is now really Haley Mani dunkel what, long hour Oh, and Lancome e lady to show