Taleem al Quran 2012 – P15 143D Tafsir Bani Israil 25-30

Rob Bukom your lord or Alemu, he knows most. He knows really well be my phenol forsaken of that which is in yourselves. Meaning he knows what you're feeling in your heart.

He knows the emotional battles that you're experiencing in your self. How you're feeling when somebody's annoying, and yet, you control your anger, and you bite your tongue. And you only say that which is respectful. Allah knows what you're going through. How comforting

because really, sometimes it happens that you feel so alone,

that your whole family is with you. But your mother she doesn't understand you. Your father doesn't understand your your siblings, even they're not taking your side. What are you supposed to do?

Rob Bukom Arlen will be Murphy no forsaken. Allah knows what is in your heart, what you're feeling, what you're going through.

And then when you're going through the struggle, you know the differences with your parents. You have this guilt also, that I'm supposed to be doing your son with my parents and here my parents are upset with me. I thought this would make them happy. But instead they're upset. Will I ever be able to make my parents happy? Like you'll begin to wonder. Allah knows your intentions. Allah knows what you really want to do. In the corner, slowly hate if you are righteous meaning overall, you are an obedient servant. And yes, it happens. That at times, you are disrespectful to your parents, you say something in haste, because you're a human being perfection cannot be expected from you. You are

only faulty and you will make mistakes in the corner Salia hain. But if overall you are good for inner who can a lil aware being of a Fula then indeed he is ever to the oft returning He is Forgiving towards them. A webbing is a plural of a web who is a web, the one who does ope and Obis to return a web return over and over and over again.

So the one who returns to Allah, again and again and again, then Allah will forgive him. Allah is Allah forward towards him, Allah is forgiving towards that individual.

The fact is that there is no child who has not fallen short in his duty towards his parents, every person, no matter how righteous they are, no matter how good they are, every single human being who has dealt with their parents. There have been moments, there have been times there have been occasions when they were disrespectful towards their parents, or when they upset their parents. Or they did something that annoyed their parents, every person. You and me, every single one of us is guilty of this.

And sometimes it happens that

parents are really telling a person to do something wrong.

Is it possible? Yeah. And then you remember, I'm supposed to sound Wirthlin parents, I'm supposed to be dutiful, I'm supposed to be obedient and my mother is crying because I'm wearing hijab. And if I take my hijab off, then she will be happy. What am I supposed to do?

You understand? There are certain situations in which parents are upset with you because you're doing the right thing.

So at that time, what are you supposed to do you feeling guilty? Allah says Rob bukem Arlen will be my fina fall, Seco. Allah knows your intention? With what intention? Are you being obedient? With what intention? Are you being disobedient to them? He knows. So at the end, what do we realize from here that our heart should always be thinking positively about our parents, we should always entertain positive thoughts about our parents.

Because if our heart is clean for them, then yes, there is miscommunication, there is misunderstanding there are problems or issues. Okay, that will happen. But if your heart is clean for your parents, you have good feelings for your parents, then Inshallah, you will be fine.

You will be fine.

I find a lot of times when we're communicating with other people, we tend to always give them the benefit of the doubt that you know what, maybe they just because they don't know who I am. They don't understand that this was slightly hurtful or anything of that sort. But as soon as it's someone close to us, we tend to forget all of those rules of like common courtesy and just being patient, because we assume that they know what we're feeling. And that's a wrong assumption because nobody can ever understand what you're actually going through except for our last panel that like even the closest person to you will not be able to, you know gauge what you're feeling at that

moment of time. You know, they'll try to understand, but what you're actually going through is completely invisible to them. They

have no idea what's going on in your mind. So you can't assume that your parents who despite growing up, you know, raising you and everything, you can't assume that they know what you're feeling. And so we can just get upset about, you know, at them for the smallest things. And in cases like these, I feel like we need to actually talk to them. Tell them you know what, this is what I was feeling at this point of time. I don't know if it was right or wrong, may Allah forgive me if it was wrong, but you need to explain to them what you're going through. And because of that, they'll return the favor, they'll start talking to you back and just the communication that trust the bond that builds

just from that is astounding, yes. And looking at this, I mean, sometimes it happens that you realize I should be good towards my parents. And then what happens you go home and your mom says something and because you're used to responding to her in a particular way you respond in that way and later on you're like oh my god, what I just do

here I am studying to your son towards your parents and I come home and I'm not doing your son towards my parents, What am I supposed to do? This is so difficult. Know, what does the ayatollahs intercooled masala hain, if your overall good, you do good towards your parents coordinate the best of your ability, then what will happen? When you turn to Allah, you do is to fall for in a hole cannon Hill away, Sabina lafora, that Allah will forgive you. So every time a mistake happens every time you are bad towards your parents, you snap, you answer back, you roll your eyes and you say oh for you sigh or you say something that annoys them? What should you do? What does the IRA tell us?

What should you do? seek forgiveness from WHO? First of all Allah subhanaw taala. And then with your parents make up somehow or the other in one way or another.

And sometimes it happens that your parents tell you to do something in your life, for example, study something, pursue a particular career, and you don't know if that's really good for you, and your heart is not really into it, should you just do it, because they're telling you do as taharah

ask Allah for guidance, look around, discuss with them communicate with them, like, for example, some parents did, they're just convinced my child should become a doctor. My child should become a doctor. I mean, some parents believe in that, from the very beginning, they've been looking at the child as this is a growing blooming doctor, you know. And as soon as you're about to go into university, that's what they expect from you. But they don't understand that you're not that good on, you know, in your science subjects, you have an average of 60 something. So at that time, what do you need to communicate with your parents, but if what your parents are telling you is okay, when

your counselor even tells you, yeah, you can go ahead with this, you can give it a shot you can try. And in your heart also you feel like yeah, I might be able to do it, then why disobey your parents just for the sake of disobeying them?

Why? If what they're telling you is not wrong, it's okay, then listen to them. And you know, what, when you will do something just to obey your parents, and also, when you've been doing istikhara, and you see that it is practical for you, then inshallah Allah will give you success. He certainly will make you successful. And then I've experienced this, I remember when I completed my old Of course, of course, you know, in high school I had fallen behind. And my mom, she basically told me, there was about six months left for the term to be over in school. And she said, you know, this December, when you have to take your exams, do this, this, this and this.

And I'm like, I don't think it's possible. She's like, No, just just get it over with just finish it. And like, I don't know if it's gonna be possible. She's like, No, do it. And I did it just because she told me honestly, that's the only reason why I did it. Otherwise, I would rather party and have fun. Seriously, but I had to do it because she told me to do it. And Alhamdulillah I have no regrets. Because I've handled the studying, it was so easy and exams, everything. And I got all straight A's Alhamdulillah. And I think one of the main reasons is because I listened to my mom.

Because you know what, we don't have much life experience as much as they have. So sometimes what they're telling us is based on their experience, they see the potential in us.

And we don't see the potential in us.

So, if they're telling us to do something good, why not do it? There will be Baraka in sha Allah. But if they're telling us to do something bad, bad either for our deen or our dunya it's really something that is not correct, then what should we do? communicate with them? Tell them what your fears are. Tell them why you think it's not okay for you to do it. educate them on what you feel and what you have found out.

Speak to them, and then inshallah hopefully they will come to terms with it. Communicate

Our problem is that we don't even communicate or when we do communicate, we become angry. And when we become angry, there's no way that we can communicate property. So anytime it happens that we make our parents upset, what does Allah subhanaw taala tell us for in no candidate aware bina lafora turned back to Allah do Toba do is the hall that Allah will forgive.

And in the previous saya where the DUA is mentioned, what does that tell us that parents are those people for whom we should be making dua?

Because if Allah is telling us say call Rob Burnham, Womack, Mr. biani, Sileo, then what should we do? Make the offer our parents?

Alright, so this dua in particular, does everybody know this, though, make it regularly. Make it regularly. And especially as women, I think the strike is very, very comforting. Because you know what, there comes a stage in your life where you want to be with your parents, you want to help them, you want to have that capacity, financial, physical, that freedom, you know, to be able to help and support and serve your parents and take away their problems. But you can't. Why? Because if you go to your parents to visit them when they're sick, you have to take your three children with you. And they will say, Please better stay home, keep your kids there, because when they come home,

my blood pressure goes even higher. So there you are crying in your home, you want to look after your parents, but at the same time your hands are tied, what do you do? A bit humble might come out of band, it's

not that ham Houma Come on, obey any Sileo make the store get used to making the store every day, they deserve, it

just kind of makes me think about how girls when they get married, they have to move away. And guys, they don't necessarily have to. And guys, like they don't really have to like, after having children and all, like, stay with them 24/7 The way a mother has to, so they have the opportunity to come back and make amends or whatever if they've been bad to them in the past. But for a girl, the only time to serve your parents you have is like before you get married. And after that, it's like you know, so consider miss call or whatever, really. So when you are with your parents, that is the time to do your son.

It's not money to live.

I kind of have a solution or somewhat solution for if you have a problem talking back to your parents in a way. It worked for me. And I kind of suggested to other people, my friends.

I had a problem wherever my mom might be arguing with me, I would think like she might say something like, she thought I did something. And I would say no, I didn't know it's arguing, raising my voice. And instead of arguing back, because whatever was in my head, I would say in my voice even if I didn't want to. And instead I started doing dig into my head. It's kind of less fun, less fun with trying to like, get the thoughts out of my head instead of saying, What's my head? Through my. So sometimes just listen to your parents, you don't have to answer. You know, for everything. You don't have to respond to everything. Just listen.

Slowly. The one thing I did want to mention is that you shouldn't outright say no to them. Because I did do that once and my mom asked me to do something. And I was like, No, I'm not going to do it. And well, the consequences weren't good.

But I realized that even if you don't agree with them, or you don't want to do something, there's a way of doing it. You know, that doesn't hurt them.

I just want to share for those girls that you know, they get married and they move away from their own home. If you're fortunate enough to be in the vicinity, like in the same home as your in laws, your parents in laws. That also is, you know, a really excellent opportunity. Like I've been witness to new brides moving into their new homes a few times. And one that I wanted to share was it was in the month of Ramadan. And this woman she was newlywed, and she lived with her in laws. And there was just a difference in expectation between the mother in law and the bride. The bride wanted to go for Turabian the mother in law expected her to just you know, clear up after dinner. And they had you

know, crosswords and they were very upset with each other. But Alhamdulillah I saw the new bride she that same evening like maybe within half an hour of that argument. She came back and she was humble and she asked for forgiveness. And this was many years ago And Alhamdulillah I've seen that the relationship between mother in law and daughter in law is so good now and the mother Mom like she praises her daughter in law, like wherever she goes. And I'm thinking that was like a crossroads. It could have gone two very different ways but the girl

She did humble herself and she is reaping the benefits of it like years later and it's really good to see him. The thing is that barons are people who are closest to us. If we cannot

communicate with them properly, if we cannot have a good relationship with them, then forget about having a good relationship with anybody else.

Seriously, if you cannot work on improving your relationship with your mother, with your father, then how can you be on good terms with your spouse? How can you be on good terms with your other relatives or other acquaintances? Not possible because parents your son is the greatest compared to anyone else's Air sign on you. Their love for you is the most compared to anyone else's love for you.

Only I just want to say one thing like mother's heart is the softest heart in this world

as like it was like when I came here my mother is in Pakistan and I worked hard so much so every day she called Don't work too much look at your kids don't like I feel this thing. Mother's Heart is the softest time if child gets hurt the pain What mother has it nobody can have it she feels it she feels it

we have to complete the lesson

what Auntie the baba haka who and give to the close relative his right who are the close relatives, those who are related to you through blood primarily. And then by extension, also through marriage. So they'll CORBA those who have some close relationship with you. Give them their hug, give them their right, give them what they deserve from you. Like what?

Being good towards them, maintaining ties of kinship with them, spending on them in their time of need, honoring them, respecting them. These are all rights of relatives and relatives. I mean, this includes your brothers, your sisters, your parents, your children, your spouse, your in laws, your cousins, your uncle's, your aunts, your grandparents, right. So give them their help, be good to them, spend on them, when they are in need, honor them, respect them, and also give his Huck to one miskeen and the poor oneness Seville and the traveler, for meaning people whose needs are not fulfilled. And they don't go on begging from people and the traveler. And what is the hook of the

traveler hospitality? Because sometimes we think if somebody is visiting well, they're very well off Michel, they can take care of themselves. They can rent a car themselves. Why should I have to drive them around everywhere? No, they deserve hospitality. So give the traveler his help. What are two beds, the tub the euro and do not spend wastefully to bet data Vera is from bear there are bigger business seed we've ever seen that picture of a farmer you know with a whole handful of seeds and what does he do? throws them scatters them. So from this tip deed is to scatter seeds to spend to basically scatter mooloolah is also used for children, little children because so many mashallah

that the spread everywhere, right? So the need is basically to spend how a lot without even thinking $1 here, five bucks here, 20 bucks here, 50 bucks here, $100 online $50 In a check. And at the end, you're like, Oh, I'm going in debt. This is the lead that all the money is just spread thrown here and here, here here here without thinking spend wastefully and in particular to lead us to spend in wrong ways in the ways of sin. Because when a person spends in a halal cause, like for example, a person goes and buys a jacket for himself because he needs it. Then you know what this is also something for which a person will be rewarded for. If a person goes and buys food in order to feed

himself, his family, you will actually be rewarded for it. It's written as a charity. He's fulfilling a halal need a halal wish. But if a person is spending his money on haram on sin, then you know what, he's literally burning his money. It's as though you are burning your money in fire.

So we'll have to be at the top of the rock. Don't do that. Don't waste your money. Now notice how the beginning of the Iowa has mentioned give to the relatives, the needy, the travelers their rights, and if you want to fulfill their rights, what do you need money?

Because what is the right of relatives that for example, you call them you speak to them, you visit them? If they're in need you spend on them. When can you do that? If you have money, but if you've been eating out every day, to Morton's breakfast and McDonald

was lunch and dinner somewhere else. And every other day you feel like having a treat. And for a treat you buy a cookie here a cookie there. What are you doing? You're wasting money, a lot of it. And then at the end when you think about, oh, I think I should go visit my parents because I haven't seen them in five years. All tickets are so expensive. I can't travel. Why? Because you've been wasting money on Timmies. Right? This is the

one I had to buy 30 Euro. It doesn't mean be stingy, so stingy that even though your head is hurting, and you need a coffee, and you're shivering, and you're so cold, you're like, No, no, I'm not gonna buy coffee from Tim Hortons. Because it's 75 cents more expensive than making coffee at home? No, come on, it's okay. Don't be stingy. But at the same time, spend wisely, because your money is going to go. But you might as well spend it in ways which are good, which are actually going to benefit you in this life and also in the afternoon.

But remember that given to the relatives or rights doesn't just mean spending on them. Because sometimes we do give very big gifts. But our hearts are full of

animosity or grudges.

We will invite them. But then as soon as they leave, we're like

no, this is not RTL Corbacho. What does it mean? Keep in touch, look out for their needs. If they're in need, help them if they're sick, visit them if they're struggling financially, assist them if they're in need of Dr. Oz make dua for them, when they die, attend their funeral, if their children need help help their children watch out for them. After the Corbett hacker who in the mobile didn't, but don't do it of the why because in the mobile during indeed those who are wasteful, those who waste a lot of money. Who are they kind of one a shell thing. They're the brothers of Shell team, Allahu Akbar. If a person wastes his money, he's spending it in ways of sin, then he's becoming like

a brother to shape on. Why? Because a brother is like his brother.

So why is such a person called brother of Shavon because he is becoming like shaitan he is supporting the cause of shaitan because a brother supports his brother right? And who is shaped on what kind of che upon only rugby, football, and shaytaan is ever to his Lord, ungrateful God for a very, very ungrateful, being rejected of Allah's favors, that Allah subhanaw taala not show many favors to IBLEES Of course, Allah honored him, you let him be in the company of the angels Allah created him. But yet, how ungrateful is shaitan so when a person wastes his money, and he deprives himself of doing good, in reality, he's being ungrateful. Allah gave him risk, so that he could do

something good with it, he wasted it, he deprived himself off, doing good. So as a result, he's being ungrateful and he's becoming like a brother to shaitan what immaterial Londoner own home and if you must turn away from them from from the needy from the relatives from the traveler, meaning you're not able to help them financially you're not able to spend on them. So you have to refuse due to lack of means ibbity law while seeking Rama to Mira big mercy from your Lord meaning at the same time you want that in the future, hopefully, you will have inshallah enough money with which you can spend on the needy with which you can spend on your relatives you can go and fulfill their rights.

Hopefully, in the future you expect ease financial ease, Mira big from your Lord or Joe how you expect it, you're looking forward to it. Then in the meantime, while you must refuse them, then don't be harsh to them and don't cut off from them and don't avoid their phone calls in their messages in their emails know for Cola, who cola may Surah keep in touch with them and say to them, a word that is may sue may sore from use one that is made use of meaning one that is easy, easy for a person to hear and easy for a person to accept, meaning don't say harsh words to them. Now, first of all, this is what does it imply? That if you are able to spend on your family, on the needy on

the travelers, you have the means then what are you supposed to do? You have to you have to spend on them.

Unfortunately now, the way we live is that each person is living his own selfish, closed life that I don't know about them and they don't know about me.

But the fact is that just as parents and children they're supposed to look out for each other brothers and sisters are supposed to look out for each other. Likewise, relatives must look out for each other if someone is in need financial aid, than what is your duty as their relative spend on them.

But what if you can not fulfill your own needs yourself? Because sometimes it happens. It's just because you're living in Canada, people think that you've got a lot of money. Alright? And they expect mean relatives in another country, they will expect some big gifts from you, or many visits from you. They begin to expect such things from you and you get annoyed that why is it that you're telling me to get detergent? When you get detergent in your own country? Why are you asking me to get all these fancy chocolates when you get these chocolates in your own grocery store?

You get annoyed, you have the same shoe store in your own country, and you're asking me to buy shoes for you and bring them from here. And if I don't you call me

something.

So it is frustrating, it is upsetting. And at the same time you're struggling to pay for your kids education or your own education. Or sometimes it happens that just because you start working your parents or your relatives, your siblings, they expect you to take a share of you know, for example, expenses of the house, right? So all of a sudden people they begin to expect from you but they don't realize that if you're making money, you're paying off your debt.

Or you are paying for your education. They don't understand. So it gets very difficult. What does Allah subhanaw taala tell us that if you must turn away from them, and you hope that inshallah in the future when you will have more money you will spend on them than for the time being, say to them good words, because Colomer often are my favorite don't hire humans are the cottony at Baraha. A good word, guide speech and forgiveness. It's better than charity that is followed by injury. So don't hurt them with your words. Rather, use good words. If you cannot give anything you can at least give love. You can at least smile you can at least say something polite. You see how important

words are with parents use good words with relatives who can get very annoying. Again, use good words. And also mean just because you can always travel back and forth to a different country to visit your relatives. That doesn't mean you don't speak to them for five years for 10 years. Cola cola may Surah Come on, you can WhatsApp them, and you can send them a text message and you can maybe call them on Viber which is absolutely free. Right? So say good words to them just because you cannot visit them. It doesn't mean that you cut off from them. cognomen cola may Surah what are the general here the coma Hello Latin Ilana quick, don't tie your hand up to your neck. What does that

mean? If your hand is tied to your neck, can you do anything? So this is an expression for stinginess that don't become close fisted. Don't become stingy. This is one extreme. And what's the other extreme? Well, Adam super hot do not extend it. colobus, what is best to stretch out your hand. You know, when you open up your hand, and you stretch out your arm, whatever is in your hand, it's going to fall, what's going to stay in your hand nothing.

So I'll add them super cool little buslee

Don't keep your money all to yourself, nor completely deplete your and exhaust your bank account so that you've got nothing left because if you do that for the Kuroda, then you will remain Maluma blameworthy. Whose fault is it? It's your fault. Massoud who was Marsel. insolvent, regretful tired. So again, where spending is encouraged, what are we told, spend wisely. spend on your relatives on the needy, but be wise, don't become so stingy that you give them nothing. And don't become so generous, apparently, that you've got nothing left. And then you're accumulating interest? Because you haven't paid your credit card bills. Because if you do that you'll be Maluma who is Milan who's

low mister meaning who's blamed who's blameworthy? It's your fault. You will blame yourself. People will blame you. Your parents will blame you and my soul who is my soul passing or hazard is to be regretful to have tired eyes. Meaning you will be regretful you will be sad, over what was done and that brought you no benefit you will be worn out you will be in poverty in Lubbock, indeed your Lord yep SUTA Liske. He extends provision for whom he may Usher for whoever He wills work did and he also restricts it. Allah is Razzak whenever he wants he can give you a lot and whenever he wants, he can restrict the risk for you. This is in his hand in no can a very bad do you have your embassy or

indeed he is ever of His servants have been aware. Bus lead seeing meaning he knows in what stage of life, more money is good for you. And he knows in what stage of your life less money is good for you

because some

times, we wish we hope if only I had $10,000 I would do this and this and this. If I had this much money, I would do this and this and this, you know what we would do, we would spend so much that we would have nothing left.

Allah knows. So accept his decree, and whatever he has given you how much ever it is, use it wisely. Don't hoard it. Don't spend all of it on yourself. And don't spend all of it on your family, or your relatives or your friends. There should be a balance moderation. That's the key. Be moderate. Spend a part of your risk on yourself. Spend a part of your risk on your family. Spend a part of your risk in the way of Allah.

Be moderate, don't go to extremes. In the following I add some more commands have been given with respect to dealing with people. Let's listen to the recitation. Welcome. B Murphy. fusi come

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