Reflections – Desiring Good For Your Former Spouse

Sulaiman Moola

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Bismillah he was salatu salam ala rasulillah his sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was that we all talk about justice. And of course, if justice can reign on the earth, then there is meaning to life. When said naramata, the Allahu anhu was resting beneath the tree, and

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a diplomat had come to me and said, Now I'm only allowed one angle. And he asked the people in Medina, where is your leader? So they said, there's the outside, just resting beneath the tree, and said, Now I'm early olana obviously had this ambience around him and had this all around him that you would be gripped by the all, although he was clad in a simple dress, there was nothing lavish or flamboyant, or there was no palace to the ameerul momineen. But just his presence itself was so inspiring. So when this diplomat came and he seen said naramata, the olana resting beneath the three he said three words he said at Delta for a min de fer named while at Delta for a min for named Omar,

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you have executed justice in its true form for a mentor. So you are peaceful and the citizens of you, of Medina, a peaceful for nimitta, so you can sleep so peacefully and in so much ease and comfort. But it's very difficult to advocate justice when it involves their own right. So you could say no, no, you know what justice needs to be meted out, and they must be no nobody's above the law. And they will face the full might of the of the law and all these slogans we can turn, but the day my own partner or my children or my sibling or my associates, then how many of us can execute the justice and that's what the Quran calls us to the loo be just one hour Allah and forsaken a will

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Wiley Dany will carabin be just even if you have to confess you are wrong, or you have to admit that your parents are wrong. And Allah says in another verse of the Quran, that while I uh, god man, calm Shannon Coleman, Allah en la de leeuw, let not the hostility or the belligerence, or the antagonism of a nation provoke you to injustice.

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In a like manner, we all speak about kindness, kindness is good kindness to your parents, to your children, to your siblings, to humans, to fellow creatures, to animals, etc. But how many of us can display kindness to someone with whom we had a hostile relationship? Someone who was a foe to us someone with whom we have difference of opinion. And where I'm going with this discussion, I want to share with you a very rich tale from the Quran, and that is kindness to your former spouse. Wow, have you ever heard of someone speaking, everybody speaks about kindness to your wife's kindness to your parents kindness to your in laws, but our faith also teaches us to be kind and caring to

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someone who you were previously married to? Of course it ended. So the fact that it was dissolved it cannot leave a very pleasant feeling or flavor or you know, or, or atmosphere, within the family circles, etc. And I'm referring to none other than the deal of Xena vintage yahoshua the Allahu taala Hannah, so she was the cousin of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Her initial name was Barbara for some mahana bu sallallahu wasallam zeyneb nobody's allowed him then give it a name Zainab candidate middle mahadji karate Oh, well, she was amongst the first people that had migrated. So the Prophet sallallahu wasallam tones a number of the alarm on ha that I want you to get married

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Tuesday either the Allahu Allah speaks about this in great detail in the 22nd Jews of the Quran, Zainab Ravi Alanna expressed her reservation and she said, No, I'm not comfortable. I'm not too sure. I don't think I want to wet him etc, etc. Now, there was a stint of slavery in the lineage and the ancestry of Zadar, the Allahu anhu. And that was also wrongly brought upon him. So the number of the Alanna had her apprehension, that probably our lineage is not compatible. We're not on the same page, etc. Allah revealed the verse in the 22nd Jews of the Quran in Surah Al Azhar wama con la Mola, Mineola, Amina Eva Kabbalah hora pseudo Emraan, a gonella, Julio Tommy Emery him, it is not

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befitting of a belief in male or female, that when a line is gonna be decreased, something for them to

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Ask concession time choice. I'll get back to you know, when our line is maybe decreased then the spirit of a believer is compliance, like Allah describes the companions in another verse of the Quran in situ in Surah to Luke in the 18 Jews in America Anna Colella, meaning either Doru Illallah. He also de Kuma baina, whom a guru semi I know that when they invited they oblige, so she retracted her reservation. She obliged, and the marriage between Zainab rhodiola and the cousin of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam and Xavier the Allahu anhu, the former adopted son of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam was solemnized But fate had it such that after the marriage was performed, shot at Hekmat

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Allahu Allah, Allah tala for crusade was a net Phoenix rahima

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that things were not compatible. So there were feuds there were arguments, there were differences of opinion. And can you imagine how challenging This is because a number of the olana I had my reservation, I did not want to wet the man from the inception, I was on the backfoot the Robinson alarmism encouraged me and I obliged and unseen to my young brother and my young sister they often they are girls that had a very clean slate or a boy who had a very clean slate, and then they got married and unfortunately they had to contend with challenges and then they start asking themselves questions, but I did not date I did not go I was not, you know I did not perpetrate any act of

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promiscuity or any crime. Why have I been subjected to challenges in my marriage? So the wisdom of Allah subhanho wa Taala we will never be able to comprehend. Look at look at look at the outcome in the life of a number of the Alanna. She had her reservation the prophet SAW some exalted the verse was revealed she are blind she got married, the marriage was rocky the marriage was turbulent. The prophets Allison would say to say that the Allahu anhu as the Quran says, I'm Sacre la casa de COVID de la, la casa de COVID, 13 la, just keep your wife and don't divorce her and don't dissolve it and just hold on. And the profits a lot isn't what tells enough, just persevere, just endure back and

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forth, up and down. But internalize them realize now it's just a matter of time, and this union will be dissolved. So in his heart, he said to himself, if this marriage gets dissolved, then the only way I can mend the heart of my cousin is by me reading her, because she took this bold step against her own choice. And she waited for my likes and my desire, and she respected my sentiments and faded such that the marriage is not taken on it's just been turbulent and rocky from the word go, what the phrasing of say Kamala Hall MOBA de Shanaze. And Allah says this year what took faith enough say, and you concealed within yourself, mala who MOBA de which, that which allow is going to reveal,

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however, the Prophet sallallahu wasallam had one apprehension. Now, in the custom of the Arabs, if you adopted someone, then it was viewed as your actual son. So he his wife is viewed as your daughter in law. So it was a taboo in the Arab culture to when the former spouse of your adopted son, but Islam came to put an end to that particular myth that existed because in Islam, forbidden for a man to marry is the daughter in law of his son that is born to him from his loin. As the Quran says, What hyla no abana a como la Vina mean a Slavic look at the beauty of our faith. Look at the holistic nature. forbidden for you is the wife of your son who's born to you from your loin. And he

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was not born to you from your law is not your own son. He's an adopted son, then his former wife is not your daughter in law and you can read her. The marriage was then dissolved. The lab was given during the period was over. And then Allah subhanho wa Taala made it such that the Prophet sallallahu wasallam gets married to the Nevada law. But now understand this year when the prophet SAW some intense marrying his cousin who's the former spouse of Xavier the olana. Do you know what my brother and my sister, the Prophet sallallahu wasallam sends her ex husband Xavier the alarm to sign up and say Stella, Zainab, I am proposing to her my word. So you have Zaid, because generally

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when the marriage breaks up, then each party feels you're not going to get better. Well, okay, let's see where your daughter gets. Let's see what your son gets here. You had the best you couldn't value it. Tough luck. You can dream wish, hope and fantasize you'll never get another woman like this. You'll never get another man like this. Yeah, that's these are the notions we have. And it's difficult to wish well for that family. Often we put blockages

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In hurdles in prospective proposals that come people say, Listen, you were married to so and so I intend getting married now don't ever get married to her or don't ever get married to him. Of course, if they are married complaints they need to be addressed. They need to be addressed more how to foster a new goal. The Prophet sallallahu wasallam speak when a woman proposed said two men have proposed to me so the province alarmism said no more are we are these are the issues with him that he has absolutely no financial, you know, stability at this time, what I'm about gentlemen, and with regards to Abuja him, either it could mean he travels a lot, so he will not be around, or they could

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be a fear of some type of physical abuse. So the prophet SAW some caution that particular Sahabi and not to marry either of the two in the proposals that had come to her. So if they are merited complaints, it is correct for you to address it, but just to be malicious, just to be nasty, just to be candid. No, that's not the teachings of Islam. So yes, either the olana goes to the number of the olana. And he says a machete as aina ozanam. I've come to give you glad tidings and the narration says as he comes, she's humbled, she is shy, she turns around, and he says, I've just come here to give you glad tidings in the Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam yabuki, the prophet of Allah is

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proposing for you. So the scholars of Hadith right for her that they beloved me my water had been a who have been as a club, despite the differences despite the marriage broke up. The Prophet of Allah sends him there. He has amin al hikmah, Anima jacobina, zol, Janie, mina frattin, was enough in some metadata in La Jolla, Tucson, yakun Romanian ministry. And so gentlemen, after that, despite the feuds, the differences, the arguments that families might have, and marriages might dissolve, that does not give you the license to inflict harm on your former partner or spouse or family, you should still continue in the spirit of benefiting them and bring in good to them. And that's what we learn

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from this great incident. And the comfort for Xena and the comfort for you my sister, that look at she oblige. She obeyed. And then her marriage broke up. But then Allah substituted her with the greatest of husbands. You cannot compare the pain she had to contend with the honor that Allah conferred upon her. And in addition to that honor that she waited the greatest of humans she used to boast to her co wives and the other spouses of the Prophet sallallahu send them and say to our Isha that you're dead, Abubakar, where did you end to have said that you're dead on top of the olana Where did you but my marriage the Quran says that Allah wedded us, as the Quran says, Phantom cavas

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I don't mean a whopper on the virginica, Haleakala Hakuna, meaning

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that after they'd had divorced we wedded the messenger sallallahu Sallam to say No brother your loved one Haha, so that the believers do not encounter any apprehension or reservation if they choose to wed the former spouse of their adopted sons because they can take comfort from the fact that even the prophets of Allah Allah will send them delete. My message is continue being kind, be it Friend or Foe beat your spouse or former spouse, but you know what's the best part? The more you bring good to others, the more divinely good will fall in your lap.