Suhaib Webb – Youth Ramadan QA Session
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Upon his family, companions, and those who follow
them till the end of time.
Did you wanna make any announcements right now?
I already made the babysitting out there. Right?
Babesitting is in the other room. And,
It's nice to see everybody.
Next to Masjid Noor, man. Those are the
good old days when you can find an
apartment for a reasonable price.
And,
of course, my my oldest children grew up
here. So whenever I come here, they ask
about people and
check-in. So,
it's nice to see everybody.
Let's do, like, a quick Ramadan check-in. Like,
we've reached hamdu'a the
first, almost week of the month. SubhanAllah. It's
going so fast.
And, you know, the first week tends to
be, for me personally, the one that I
adjust and then after that, it becomes,
somewhat easier.
So does anyone wanna quickly just give us
how you're doing? Just just a word one
word to describe yourself,
how you're feeling. So I'll start. I'll say,
you know, I feel excited, like, I'm excited
for the rest of the month. Alhamdulillah.
Looking forward to, putting in some work
over the next few weeks, inshallah.
How about anyone else who wants to share
some feelings?
One word to describe where you are
in our Ramadan check-in. You want to feel
welcome
regardless of age, gender, ethnicity, whatever.
You
know? Like, one community were made up of
all of these different amazing parts.
Yes, sir.
Feeling blessed.
Feeling blessed. That's great, man. Feeling blessed.
You know, I just had a well, I
didn't have a baby. I watched the baby
be ready, like, to not sleep. I was
like,
edger
for that inshallah. More edger than I would
regularly. So I'm feeling blessed. Thank you for
sharing. Who else wants to share, like, how
are you feeling
in this incredible month,
this month of Ramadan? Yes, sir.
Good.
Can we learn?
You
Makes me shy. So good tired. I love
it. Yes, sir. Inspired.
Inspired.
Yeah, man.
Month's Ramadan, man. It's time to time to
get into the zone.
Who else would like to share quick Ramadan
check-in, one word to describe how you're feeling?
Yes, ma'am.
Optimistic.
Yeah, ma'am. Optimistic.
You know, like the prophet said, who fast
the month of Ramadan with faith and hope,
they will be forgiven.
We ask God to make us of those
people. Yes, sir.
Happy and proud. Happy and proud. And tired.
I get, like, 4 They just follow.
It's like a sun and a vaulad. You
know? Just interesting. It's no. It's a beautiful
thing, but also you wanna be careful, like,
safe for kids. Yes, sir.
I saw some other people. Yes. Yes, sir.
I'm feeling happy. Feeling happy.
Man. May Allah appreciate you.
Yeah. Fortunate. Right? Our own mother lived now
Ramadan. The Sahaba, you know, we used to
ask Allah let us to live to see,
you know, like, another Ramadan.
You know, like,
we won't realize how lucky we are till
we die. You know?
And then the fasting, the prophet said, we'll
we'll be your lawyer,
pro
bono.
You know? Like, in front of Allah,
say, this person left his food and drink.
She left her food and drink
for you.
SubhanAllah.
Then we'll be like,
I'm glad I fasted, man. I'm glad I
got it done. Yes, sir. I am thirsty
for water and knowledge.
Thirsty for knowledge and, for water and knowledge.
You know one of our teachers used to
say,
you should if you really do Ramadan correctly,
you enter hungry for food, and you leave
hungry for Allah. Allah.
You know, sad Muslims are. But, like, have
you heard one bad response?
Like, loving a Muslim is an act of
decolonials revolution.
We don't know one of the now or
the Bay Area, but if you're from the
Bay Area, you know that language. It is
to love a Muslim is a decolonialist
effort that is rewarded by Allah Subhanahu Wa
Ta'ala. It goes against the grain of everything
that's going wrong in the world. So loving
a Muslim is like far.
So the prophet said, you know, that Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala, the most beloved fara to
Allah or the most beloved thing after the
fara, it
is to make a Muslim happy.
So
Yes. I see a few more hands up,
and then we're gonna jump into our lesson.
Yes, ma'am.
Connected.
Connected.
Yeah. It's a great time to connect with
community.
You know? It's not especially after COVID, like,
being at in the masjid, being in Tarawee,
it has a different feel
than it you know, the Zoom stuff.
You know, it's like, well, I think you
got the wrong holiday, bro. And yep. So
I'll be Ramadan.
You can say whatever you want.
Ah, yeah. The the,
in the earth and the the the sea,
and they're asking me, said, so Allah will
not, like,
And then and then, of course, that's the
statement of Kufr. But then Allah subhanahu wa
ta'ala brought his body back together, and he
said, why did you do that? He said,
I feared you.
Allah forgave him. More merciful than the insecure
people online.
You know? So like here, as the sheikh
said, the other hadith of the man who
lost his camels and all of his supplies
in
the in the desert,
and then said,
camel and the supplies, and he said,
So Allah, you are my slave. I am
your lord. And then the prophet said,
He made a mistake out of happiness. This
is important for a psychotherapist, and that's a
different discussion.
Right? This is all emotional health, man.
So he he made the mistake. So this
young man, he said what he said,
out of
out of happiness. So no problem.
Happy whatever.
So, we're gonna take a few moments just
to read from the hikm of Imam
Imam. Sayna Imam.
When he used to see me, he used
to say,
and on a statement
that the prophet
said his
you know is a treasure from the arsh,
and that is
And the prophet
means to say that this statement is the
most beloved thing to me.
Because the prophet
is a person of and
in in a complete sense.
And that's why he said
the most beloved statement is the statement of
He said, what is that said? The one
who says in the.
I mean, the person who when there were
people, they say
they're in the state of dhikr. So this
statement in particular, the
this is and when you have the
right,
the the the year happens.
So, you know, they kinda train translate as
there's no power, but actually is like, there's
no change. Nothing's happening.
Nothing occurs.
Right? And there's no strength.
Except and this is called
except
except.
Nothing happens. And this is the key to
our,
and and that's why it's important to study,
from the Quran because
everything that happens
Everything is from Allah. And we live in
a society that is really
the ethos of society is commodification
and then gain. So we find even sometimes,
like, the gospel, the prosperity gospel gospel of,
say, like Joel Olsteen, this is this is
very counter to, like, an Islamic understanding of
theology.
Our relationship with Allah is not commodified.
Sometimes we meet Muslims, it's it's it's it's
it's normal. It's like Allah hates me. Why
does Allah hate you? Because, like, I didn't
get into this grad school. It's like, you're
not that important, man. You know? Like, you're
not of your own, bro. You just didn't
get into UC Berkeley. You got into Stanford.
Okay?
Got to NYU, not Columbia. It's like, okay.
God hates me. It's like, you're not that.
When he
said,
this verse is sent about the poorest
people in the prophet's community.
Allah says to him, you must be resilient
with them.
Like, be with
And they may have been poor in their
in their bank account, but they were rich
in. Like, make me rich by feeling I
need you,
and don't make me poor by feeling I'm
free.
So Allah commanded him to be with those
kind of people.
So we don't look at our our relationships.
Oh, why?
That's so shallow.
Allah loves me. I got into this grad
school.
Maybe Allah loves me, and he tests me,
so the only thing I have to turn
to and rely on is Allah.
So the hikm
of
is a set of reflections
that has been taught, and the is happening
always in the masjid.
The is always happening for the people.
The,
the hadith,
6 major books of hadith,
always there's a halak of tafsir.
Always there there's halakat of, you know, like,
logic and stuff like this. There's always halakat
of, of course, language. There's always a halakat
of the hikm.
Always.
Like, everywhere you go. The word al Hikm
is from the word hikma. It's the plural
of hikma.
This form like kalima kalim.
Kalima is? You kidding me? I have a
baiti about them and to have, You know,
in his poem.
So it means wisdoms.
The word wisdom in Arabic, you know, it's
a very interesting word. It comes from a
a word which means to stop something. You
know?
Because sometimes, you know, people think means to
be soft.
Like, wisdom means to be soft. But in
Arabic, it's more broad.
It's It's more sort of in-depth.
Lord hikam means a manah.
There is one. I don't wanna get too
complicated because I swear fast I am
too.
You know, one of the old poets said,
oh, tribe of Hanifana, the imam. Talking the
voices before. Right? The tribe of Hanifah, akhimwani
alna'w.
I'm gonna stop your foolish ones.
Because if you think about it, wisdom, it
keeps us from acting stupid.
Right? It keeps us from acting irresponsible.
Keeps us from 2 people. We have 2
judges. Sister just appointed this week,
New Jersey, I believe.
But Haqim is the one who. He stops
people. So is meant to keep us within
the Islamic nomenclature
from anything which is associated with ignorance.
And ignorance is defined as anything that will
lead to the displeasure of
Allah. And that's why say to the imam
Shafi'i,
in his he said the hikma hikma is
soon.
Like the hikmah is the way of the
prophet.
So we're gonna read a little bit through
the hikmah. I may ask you to, like,
stop and reflect next to your partner because
the hiccup is a little deep, you know.
We don't wanna make it too heavy because
got those samosas
in the back,
and we hope that we can get some
carbs in us as we start to enter
into ketosis.
And then he's gonna we're all gonna be
in a bad mood
for a while. So, the
hikm
is about the statement that there is nothing
happening and there is no strength
except with Allah, the good and the bad.
And the text is really what I would
I would like to locate as, like, restorative
theology. We don't talk about restorative theology.
But it is a a the the hiccup
is not a book of the soul of,
like, this is sometimes a mistake, and the
outcome is ihsan.
So the
is learning, the beginning is learning faith, but
the ending is.
We should be careful sometimes when we make
this mistake. And as we go through it,
just in the beginning, you're gonna see how
it challenges you,
and it it's very distilled.
It's a very distilled text.
So the first ten we're gonna try to
read the first ten. That's what he does.
He's not hiding with him? He's not hiding.
Does he not show you that? It's not.
It's not. It's not. Kind of embarrassed to
speak from him. You know, it's kinda weird,
man.
But,
the first ten are gonna talk about the
things that come between us and trust.
Because we have to understand that that trust
in Allah demands that we push into trust.
I don't know the absolute recognizes
is our actions. Lesson for the saint, there's
a lesson for the sin.
Because that that sometimes happens in community. Like,
I've been there. I remember when I first
became Muslim, and I just became Muslim. My
friends were really bad people at that time,
in a sense, like, just wild. You know?
And I remember that Sheikh was saying, like,
tell me who your friends are, brothers, and
I'll show you who you are.
You know, I don't even it was, like,
a week. I was like, oh my god.
And he's like, what about you? I was
like, nah, man. I ain't got no friends,
bro. I'm just all alone in the world.
And then my friends became also underladies. Like,
your friends are wild. I said, yeah. So
I didn't say anything. But sometimes we we
may inadvertently ostracize members of the community by
using irresponsible language that doesn't recognize that sometimes
the sincere sinner is better than a hypocritical
saint by a 1000000 times over.
So there always has to be that door
for everybody to push into
knows how to open the most doors
to Allah
because people come from different places. That's why
when people would come to say,
So ask
Allah
So he begins and he starts with actions.
He says,
he says, your actions
is that
when bad things happen,
you waver,
You slip.
And this hiccup is itching because if you
think about it, there's duality.
For the the the doers of good, how
many of us, like, we we in our
own life, we got blinded by our own
religiosity.
I went to Azhar, and now I'm better
than people.
That's how shaitan plays with me.
Shaitan will come at you. The the the
biggest one of my teachers said, you know
what? The greatest
the greatest subtle way that people who learned
lose everything is?
He said, what is secure?
Areas.
Even though we're.
And when we finish, he would say, what
are you gonna do with what you just
learned?
He's like, what do you mean? He's like,
at least pray to her
or go give charity.
Like, translate it like
So the Sheikh said,
the fact that you trusted who guided yourself
to do this, Allah guided you. So it
doesn't matter if test come, if test go,
whatever, you're with Allah.
Don't get caught up in your laurels, and
also don't think that Allah owes you anything
because of your Ibadah.
That's in Jannah.
The second lesson is for the the person
who struggles, man.
The person who struggles to maintain a healthy
relationship with the iman and may fall into
sin. Allah
caused him to slip a life of faith
and devotion that were kept from repentance. Is
this the idea that we're not good enough?
I don't deserve Allah's free to think about
forgiveness.
And that's why the Quran says
You too. Allah turned to them, so they
repent to him.
And then Allah turned to them by making
them feel guilty. So when you feel guilty,
when you feel bad,
it's a strange usage in Arabic like
He said guilt is long is good as
long as it inspires.
We can cause them
that's not a good thing. Sometimes in marriages,
we may use guilt
in ways that are there's a place for
guilt as long as it inspires,
but not to the point that it wrestles
people's utility from them. That's what sayna Muhammad
sallallahu alaihi wa sallam,
the Hadith
related by Sayid Muhammad Irbidi,
from Sayid Anas that the prophet salallahu alaihi
wa sallam, he,
you
know, chastised his companions to the point that
they begin to weep.
He said,
you know, if you knew what I knew,
you would laugh a little and cry much.
And then he left them.
That narration is in Riyadh
And saying that Imam Al Nawi Rahim Ohola,
he took a lot of Rial Salihin from.
I have gone and checked the whole narration.
The whole narration in Suribidi actually is the
narration in Suribidi
saying that you really came to him and
he said, Allah has commanded me to tell
you not to leave them like this.
Don't leave them despondent, man. Go back. Go
back. Bashirul.
You know, give them good news.
Changes the whole meaning of the haditha. And
say the Muhammad went back to them, and
then say the and the said he placated
them.
So sometimes we have to be careful as
Islamic studies teachers, as imans, as shoo,
you know, how guilt is. One of our
teachers used to say, is like medicine in
the cabinet, and the smart physician is the
like, so it's not in the Quran. The
Quran uses
Tell my servants I'm so forgiving. I forgive
everything, but also tell them I punish.
So there is a balance
between these things.
1 of our teachers said
in So actually
that the person who hosts me, actually, it
means fear, even though I'll use the word
hope
to show that that fear should inspire
hope
The outcome of the figure is hope. That's
something
we can't appreciate, but going to can
tell us, as Abu Hamlet says, Allah will
never forgive me. Allah will never I'm not
worthy of repentance. And that may have been
reinforced
by childhood trauma. So I believe it's very
important
that we partner with people in our community
to address these things.
Shoot. At least me. I'm not trained how
to do that stuff.
So there has to be interdisciplinary
approaches to some of the challenges that face
iman that our iman faces.
Or
bad maybe, unfortunately, like religious teachers, man, who
reinforce guilt in a way that overcame us
and wrestled our utility is not good.
So I rely on my sins instead of
So trust in Allah. Don't worry about your
deeds. You did good, fasal going to sin?
Repent.
Come to Allah. Well, I subhanahu, repentance in
the Quran
is so nice how it's
presented, man. It's emancipating.
It's powerful.
Allah
taught us in the very beginning of the
central role of seeking forgiveness.
He narrates this difference in all of the
other 6 quora.
But made it changes.
If you the way we we have
Adam,
he received,
you know, Adam, he, like, he engaged the
words of repentance.
It's the words who came to Adam and
his
and then Allah commanded the words to push
to him.
So saying that Adam Allah
loved him so much that he commanded these.
Very beautiful.
So the first hiccup, we used to say
about this hiccup is the hiccup,
the hicom of trust,
and the hicom of hope.
Hope for the one who fell into mistakes.
That there's no and he talks about it
later on in the, hey, this is from
Allah and for myself. Of this world
is the individual.
Like the,
the
of this age is the individual. Everybody is
so
enamored with themself.
And that's why it's the age of age
of exhibition. Look what people do on social
media, man. People with their girlfriends on top
of a tower in Dubai, man,
sort of naturalize
to
this weird behavior.
The second thing we say about this hikam
is for the people Allah has guided them
to be on the
is they should be
humble. You used to be like them.
You used to be like those people, and
Allah blessed you, Allah guided you, brought you
to this.
So religiosity
should not lead
to arrogance
and neglect.
It should lead to humility and grace.
And sin
should lead to hope and.
The next hikom
man. So the second hiccup
go fast. That's u shaped.
2nd. 2nd. But I didn't I didn't wanna
read it with.
You know, when I first embraced Islam, I
was a freshman in college, and I met
a brother
in the masjid who was really, really successfully
irresponsible.
And for you, I was like, yeah. You
know, I'm William and just, like, became Muslim
last week, man. See her try to learn
how to pray. He's like, did you choose
a med habit? I was like, I don't
know what the * is going on. She's
gonna learn how to pray, man. You know?
And
and then he told me, like, what do
you do? I'm so young. You know?
When you're young, people ask you what you
do. It's kinda scary.
I said, I'm doing nothing. You know, double
negatives, bro.
I said, I,
I go to college, and he's like, you
let that kaffir teach you?
I thought Kafir was yogurt. I thought Kafir
was
like, Kafir?
And so I said,
he was mad. I mean, and some of
the things he said were good too, though.
You know what I mean? Like, some of
it was good. But then he told me,
he's like, you should quit school, man. You
should quit school. You should go on 40
days.
And he wasn't teaching. Right? So
I went home.
Wow. A PhD.
You know, worked from nothing. Paid for his
own college education.
And,
you know, I was like, yeah. I'm a
quit college, mister doctor Webb.
And my father was like, what?
This is a little bit after I became
Muslim.
He was like, what? I was like, yeah.
You know,
I'm a go learn the dean.
He said, what's that? You know? So I
started telling my father, yeah. I'm a go.
I'll learn all day long. I'm a learn,
become like
a Pablo.
You know? It's gonna be, like, amazing man.
And so my father's old school, and I'm
generation x, which means we got physically assaulted.
So I I said,
he said, my father's Sheikh.
He said to me,
who's gonna pay for this? Then he says
something to me which fits this hiccup.
He said, you know what? You're not a
religion. You're lazy.
That's true. You're you're a bunch of lazy
people.
So you might be able to tell a
lot here in the second, hey. Leave congress
and case managers.
I don't mean that in a bad way
because it's just a lot to take on,
man. Like, it's emotionally very draining. It can
be financially threatening.
It it can be psychologically,
challenging. And if you're older and you're married,
it can threaten your relationship. I mean, it's
a lot to it, man, if you have
older children.
So I believe, like, there needs to be
a case manager that what questions do you
have for me?
I remember as a lady, Guatemalan woman, her
daughter became Muslim. She was very young. She
came to the mosque
and she met me. And then she was
like, I'm, you know,
I'm scared, man. You Muslims, man.
I was like, I get it. I understand
what you've what have you seen about Muslims.
What she saw, of course,
was bad stuff. Then I said, what do
you want for your daughter?
She's like, I want my daughter to go
to college. I was like, I want your
daughter to go to college. Then
she invited me to the house for food,
and they lived in they lived in, like,
the projects. You know?
And so I I was after hookah, I
had on the cut cool and everything, the
Esar outfit. So I went to the projects
then, and, we had the black beans and
rice. Let's get vegan. And,
then after we ate, she said to me,
you know,
Diablo?
Do you know the devil?
And so I said,
no. I'm trying to get out of it.
You know?
A lot of that Diabolo stuff.
And then she said, because Diabolo
is here
in her house. So I was like, I
just signed up for this man. Let
me go back on Facebook and do some
posts and feel good about myself.
And she's like, I invited Shay. I invited
the priest,
but everybody here, they they did the water
cross, everything, but the diablo just
gets
stronger.
So she's my
and then I swear this is true.
As soon as I
said,
she looked at the door.
I said, really? I said, I feel good
about myself. You're like, okay.
So what you have seen, boy?
Do some different people. I don't care. You
do it. Let's do it. That's my honey.
So
and then I said to her,
do you believe in the one that made
it made it leave? She asked, and then
you should
take.
She's a.
The whole the whole the whole thing right
there from the big pot of black beans.
She took.
They did conversion into Islam.
You facilitate now you're engaged in real work.
So the sheikh, he says and this happened
to me. So when I first and that
her daughter also, when she first became well,
she's excited, you know, hamasa, you know.
I
used to have to tell her, like, easy.
Yeah. I'm a bring my whole Quran. I
was like, just just do Fatima, man. Just
Fatima.
Take it easy. And this also applies to
people who come back to religion. You meet
people sometimes in the middle of age who
suddenly come back to religion, and they just
wanna go so fast,
and they destroy everything. So
he says,
Just haram. Get rid of this. Get rid
of that. Get rid of that. Get rid
of that. That's the Like
you like you like you peel the orange,
you wanna peel your life. And the sheikh
said, be careful of that. When you first
find that religious
kind of zeal and that's why sometimes religious
people turn us off because Imam Wadi Muhammad
is a great metaphor. He said religion is
like alcohol. You drink too much of it,
you're compromised.
Your mind no longer works.
Right? So he says,
Says you wanna peel everything away from your
life, but Allah
Allah puts you there.
Allah puts you there. That's why sometimes when
new Muslims don't tell them, leave everything. He
said to his brother, he told me to
leave everything. I left everything, then a year
later, he found me, my friend. Like, man,
tell me what happened to you. You just
disappeared. I made Tajid.
But maybe I should have made Tajid tearing
everything apart.
You you wanna peel everything away from you,
but Allah gave it to you. So again,
Allah gave it to you, so you didn't
give it to yourself. So appreciate it if
Allah gave it to you. Be patient. There's
hikmah. That's what he's saying. Because oftentimes when
we become religious, we get zealous and we
say,
That's what he's saying.
Don't do that.
Don't just recklessly destroy everything. I remember,
and god bless my mother, man. That woman,
boy, she she went through it. I was
20 years old. Wild. You know?
I came on, so you gotta take down
the pictures.
There's no more music. Get rid of those,
you know, Simon and Garfunkel records, shit in
the sixties. No more Doobie Brothers, that's haram
2. You gotta start my mother actually would
go to to the the bizarre online or
telling you that you shouldn't do, you should
do, and that is what listen to the.
That's why you find oftentimes the the most,
you know, aggressively new religious people or the
most passionate people, they're anti Ulema. Because what's
the job of the Adam? The Adam is
to keep you balanced and centered.
That's why I say to Aisha said, we
used to be angry at the prophet because
he used to order us to do what
we can handle. We wanna do more. We
should get mad at him. We wanna do
more. And the prophet said, command the people
to do
command them what they can do. That's why
has a whole section
on
what is offering.
Alright? That there's no.
You shouldn't ask people to do something that's
impossible. Let me give you an example. He
said, like, if you said to someone, Al
Razi says, if you said to someone,
know, go into the heavens and bring your
water.
So Al Razi says, asking people to do
things that are is beyond their
Then he says,
because that meant, what's the pedagogy over there?
I was like, I don't know. They're supposed
to be hanging out. You're right, man.
Drinking some who else, man. Have some goat.
My father's like, what? My father said, at
least if you went and studied at a
reputable Islamic institution, I will respect
this ridiculous
ID.
I'm gonna say that, hey, you know, all
that
you the opposite is when I went to
Egypt, I never told you this. I lived
here. You guys supported me when I was
in Egypt. I was in Egypt, man, and
I remember I saw the show at Office.
I saw it in Egyptian.
I saw Michael Scott.
I was watching The Office. They were like
my age. Pam and Jim, they were like
my age.
And Shaitanya was like,
man.
You ruined your life. You came here to
study religion.
All your friends, they have start ups.
They live in, like, sometimes a whole week.
Subhanahu, they have money.
We used to consider, like, Michelin star dinner
was kosher.
175,
you know,
pence.
We got it. Now it's more expensive. I'm
I'm I'm a test economist.
So,
I remember I started thinking, nah, I should
quit. I should leave the SR, you know,
because I'm broke. I have nothing. I have
my kids. I have no savings. I have
no career. I'm not in an office like
Jim and Pam.
You know?
And then I was like, this is Shaitan.
Shaitan wants you to get that you don't
even need. My apologies. Like, Allah puts you
in a place where you didn't need those.
That's what he's saying. You didn't need all
that. A lot of put you in place
where you have what's sufficient. You have sufficient
wealth. That's ethos. It's there's no contentment, man.
Like, online, there's no contentment. You find influencers
who are Muslims, I deal with them sometimes
on spiritual issues. Man, they have, like, not
all of them, but a lot of them
in there messed up, man. Even though they're
very successful because there's no end to it.
They want more and more and more and
more. They're never satisfied with themselves.
So he says,
You won.
He said, be careful of that
Be careful that if you do that, it
may take you from
2 sides of religiosity. 1 is, I'm new
to the religion and I have a lot
of zeal. I'm studying it. I'm just like,
I'm lit. I'm ready to go.
The other is I'm religious,
but things are pulling me away from it.
I remember I was here. I'll give you
a great example. In in this community, it
must ignore,
Oh, the 5 year stories it must ignore
what on Saturdays with the cream cheese and
honey.
And this brother came, so I gotta talk
to you, man. I need to talk to
you right now. This brother's a very successful
executive of a company that we can't mention,
and none of you know him. He's gone.
He's not here anyways. He's like, you know
what, man? I wanna move to, I wanna
go I wanna go to, like, Mauritania.
His brother had, like, 5 kids
that were all under 6.
Was like, you wanna do what? He's like,
yeah. You wanna quit my job. I'm I'm
doing nothing for the dean, man.
Like, you know, I'm not doing enough, like,
stuff for. I was like, but
you I know what you give to the
community. Like, I know how you support. You
are doing good. You don't need those SFABs.
Stay here. That's what he's getting at.
The 3rd hiccup, as we, inshallah, tried to
wrap it up, we might not finish all
10 of them,
Deals with perhaps one of the most difficult
challenges we all have in a society that
amplifies the important role of the individual,
and in fact creates, as Ibn Taylm says,
the chronic sense of illusion about how strong
we are.
If you ever go to the gym, especially
on January 1st. Right? Go to the gym.
You see people trying to lift more than
they can lift,
and they start that way.
Because they're, like, delusional, man.
So
he
says,
I mean, I have to marry this person.
I no. You don't. That's not your answer.
I have to get into this grad school
when I was in competitive teaching. I have
to go. I have this hat oh, I
have to have my kid go there. I
have to this this. He says listen to
what he says in the hikm. He says
competitive passions, like, your hot passion
is never going to pierce
the fortress of Allah and Qadr.
You
can't do it.
Because it's not
Just because I'm passionate about something doesn't mean
it's right. So then how do I come
to a conclusion that my my passion
is correct? Number 1, I learned
as much as I can about the issue
that's causing this.
It shouldn't be a what? Like, I think
this is gonna be good for me or,
like, you know? No. You have to learn,
like, istikhara. The first thing you should do
with istikhara is learn as much about the
issue as you can. So your istikhara is
informed. The same thing here. Why are you
passionate about it? They did a a a
a few years ago.
They I think it was the 10th year
anniversary of the iPhone. Right?
And, they asked people in line, like,
when was the last time you got a
phone? They're like, oh, last year. Not last
year. I have the latest one. It's, like,
so awesome. IPhone 9. It's the best phone
ever made.
It's all really cool. So then, like, why
are you here?
And, like, oh, this is the iPhone 10.
They're, like, can you tell us one of
the
advantages of purchasing this new phone that the
iPhone 9 r doesn't have already?
And why? They're like,
nope. Nope. They cannot
quantify or qualify
what encouraged them to make this decision.
So a passion is good if it's informed.
But it doesn't mean it has to happen.
So the first I should learn about it.
Can I accomplish this or not? And the
4th I should resign myself to whatever Allah
has decreed. So he says,
your competitive passion is not going to pierce
the the the guarded
fortress of Allah's decree.
It can't be how much time do I
have, buddy? Pretty much. Oh, really? So we'll
we'll make we'll make a few quickly. Everybody's
okay? Yeah. Alright. Alrighty. Well, awesome.
Freaking amazing, man.
You guys passionate?
Yeah. Alright. You can't you can't break down.
The next
is perhaps one of the biggest challenges for
people, and Imam Ibn Hazem actually says very
beautifully,
which don't read it. But it's not necessarily
the religious goal of people. A biological goal
that they'll never admit, he says, is to
achieve pleasure and and reduce
And, actually, what I've noticed with Muslims
is when they're stressed out is because they
actually think they can be one of the
sifaats of Allah.
Like, it should be used as a psychological
analysis.
Like, my kid
had to get into NYU. Right? Who are
you?
That's not yours.
Now why can't I make this? Because you
can't make.
So what I've noticed with Muslims in this
of course, they're still Muslim. I'm not saying
they're not Muslim. It happens
before people, man. Is sometimes we get it
twisted,
and we don't understand our true limitations.
How smart is the person who truly knows
his limitations?
That's why I'm saying
that in who advised you
loves
you. Who flattered you, cheated you? Man, how
many how rare is it that you could
you know, one of our teachers, she's saying
to. If you can find someone to advise
you, you should pay them.
You should 1099 them.
Not people do that, life coaches.
But even someone that is an interlocutor,
someone that will actually tell you, like,
Like, I sincerely love you. Like, this is
what you should do.
Hey. Arguments with can you really legitimate because
of your love for each other, you can
negotiate
trauma and differences
in a way that maintains the love of
the marriage.
We don't like that. We always wanna find
people that make us, like,
they don't tell us about ourselves.
So say the will he said, you should
you should
relieve yourself from trying to plan everything.
What it means by plan everything is the
outcomes.
You should stopped trying to plan outcomes. Just
do your due diligence. Just work hard.
Make effort. Yourself a break from trying to
do plan the outcome.
Because what's been done for you, you can't
do for yourself.
Cannot, Allah.
So one of the best ways we can
deal with anxiety is to understand and appreciate
limitation. And the irony is usually, we have
anxiety about things we can't control.
Leave it to Allah. Before we do everything,
you know Allah. The last one, inshallah, before
we break for,
iftar, my life's up to, inshallah. I appreciate
you guys. I know it's hard to listen
this long, man. And it's a heavy topic,
and I'm trying to just skim through it,
sort of get little points here, here, and
there. Then I'm going from the dome too,
which is always terrifying,
the book in front of me. But the
next hiccup
and this is perhaps one of the greatest
challenges for religious people.
We said there's this duality,
as well as people who struggle.
That is the unanswered
dua.
That can come between us and trust, especially
if my relationship with Allah is commodified.
I was I was religious all Ramadan. It
was like, I I avoided bad stuff. Then
after Ramadan, I made dua or.
That's too towards Allah's like that. What kind
of husband it would be? What kind of
wife it would be? What kind of father
it would be? What kind of kids it
would be?
So the sheikh is
And you've been like, y'all Allah need this.
Y'all love the graduate
school dua, you know, the married dua, that
one.
Yalla, please. And when people are sick, we're
begging yalla, please. That sincere dua.
He said don't allow the delayed response with
that kind of
dua cause you to despair.
So beautiful in Arabic.
Don't let it be a cause of your
despair.
Because Allah guaranteed you an answer.
We know the hadith. People always say, dua.
Cause you to despair.
He guaranteed you, he will respond to you.
In
a time he wants, not the time he
wants.
The answer will be there. People say,
don't don't worry about that.
So Allah is always hearing.
He hears everything.
So it's not that your wasn't heard,
It's the one who has the hikm
and the wisdom and all power
chose not to answer in the way you
want because he knows more than you.
And that's why our teachers say that the
true sign of your tawhid is how you
act with the dua.
Like, how do I really affirm tawhid is
my action with dua? So it says,
but Allah guaranteed you a response.
And what he chose for you,
not what you chose for yourself.
So how do we come to grips with
that? Patience and resilience and du'a. We're just
gonna make it quick. Shalom can come back
and go through the hiccup, like, you know,
like but we do have discussion groups take.
But one of the greatest tests
for people is their health.
We're the health of others. And so the
prophet said there are 2 blessings most people
lose out on. The second one from right
health
and every time. He said, 5 before 5.
What is your health before you're sick?
He says is is Arabic is very beautiful.
He says, either
if he opens up for you, which
which
means
sickness, tests,
hardships,
difficulties. But the phrase is it meaning,
and you have to pay attention to this
as we finish. And this is something I
hope people who are not able to fast
here, and even sisters who are menstruating here,
or breastfeeding or pregnant here, and you walk
out of this like,
I'm good.
I'm so good.
If Allah
in in our theology, it means an opening.
Yeah? Like al Fatiha.
But traditionally, I heard from one of our
teachers years ago,
is it means an opening is a victory.
Inna,
we gave you a victory. And what do
we call the dua when we pray, the
opening
dua?
The dua of seeking fat because salah is
a victory on your house.
So here he he locates tests in our
health
as a victory to know him through tests
and difficulties.
Do not despair
if your deeds be chemotherapy. I went to
visit him. May Allah bless him, his hair
was falling on. He's like, man, I gotta
fast, bro. He's like, no, man. You don't
have to fast, but, like, he's like, no.
No. I I have to. I have to.
This is wrong. Like,
Because the prophet said
that in Sahih Muslim, that for people who
regularly did something but were kept from it,
they get their orders though they did it.
Actions are wide in tissue. Then he said,
The only reason that Allah allowed you to
experience this difficulty is because he wanted you
to know him.
To know Allah through adversity.
I'm gonna hear your voice.
He wants you to know him. Now every
time we heard this Haikon, we would say,
what? It's like, know him through harshness, like,
a harsh situation.
And he says
but specifically on the test, the difficulty, the
illness,
And the actions
are what
you is what you gave him.
And he said, how can you compare what
you would give to him to what he
would give to you? What does he mean
that when we're sick and when we're ill,
it's an opportunity to know the grace of
Allah? Because a person who's sick and ill,
their intention for a per every day, 10,
15 questions from breastfeeding mothers.
It's already a very hormonal challenging pregnancy,
destroys the body.
We should tell them, don't worry about it.
It's just a big deal.
Make it up later.
So this is what he's getting out of
this hiccup.
That and I'm not looking yet. Allah wants
you you get it?
Whereas if I actually fasted, I fasted and
fasted William Webb.
I'll take capital Khalil Ibrahimani any day.
And that's when the hadith of the prophet
relayed my imam, you would imagine.
He said, salallahu alayhi wa sallam that Allah
subhanahu wa ta'ala says to the malaika,
record for those kept from doing come between
us and trusting Allah. The last of all
was the illness because sometimes why is this
happening to me? Why can't I fast? This
also applies to sisters who can't, like, because
of menstruation, breastfeeding, and other things, are not
able make the intention, you know, if I
call the issue anxiety.
And before that, we talked about what
the idea of passion
in the very first hiccup,
the challenge of deeds. So the first ten,
if you go read the hiccup, some translations
unfortunately are not very good. People wanna use
big clumpy words. We know in the academy,
we hate that. Just use simple words to
translate it, man.
But those first in hickem are those things
those things that keep me from trusting in
Allah. So that's
We're gonna turn it over now to shave.