Sadullah Khan – Courtesy of Listening

Among the most basic of all human social

needs

is the need and the desire to understand,

and more importantly to be understood.

And the best way to understand people is

to listen to them.

And listening

is, of course, an essential element

for effective communication.

After all,

listening attentively,

and responding appropriately

is the basis

for good conversation.

And also,

it's the foundation for

respectful communication.

Do remember though,

listening is a simple task,

but it is a complex skill.

That's why very few people really listen.

Very few people

really listen.

And therefore, we don't always get

what the speaker intended.

And therefore, very often, our responses are not

always appropriate.

So it's a simple task, listening simple task.

But it's a complex skill.

Because

it involves hearing attentively,

with a desire to truly understand what the

person is saying.

And

if you were to respond,

that you would respond in the most appropriate

manner.

Now as we continue

our series,

duroosh amikah minasiratin

Nabawiyah.

Profound lessons from the life of the prophet

Muhammad

We reflect on an incident

that indicates the prophet's attentiveness

in listening even to those

who may be opposed to him.

We don't even listen to our own parents,

or our own children, or or friends, or

workmates.

But here the prophet's attentiveness

even to someone who oppose him.

Early in the mission of Rasulullah

at a time when preaching the message of

Islam was increasingly

difficult,

and where opposition

to Islam was also on the rise in

Makkah at that time.

In that period,

the Quraysh felt it necessary

to send someone to seriously speak to Prophet.

It's he's their cousin of course, he was

also of the Quraysh, his uncles were in

charge, many of them.

And they wanted to

ask him to stop his preaching of his

message.

And they formally counsel, a group of people

who decide,

first of all, to try and stop him

but also to analyze,

is he, why is he

attacking so many people?

Like,

is he a poet maybe, a shayid? Is

there poetry in what he does? Is he

a magician maybe? A sahir?

Is he a sorcerer, a kind?

Or is he just making rambling of things

that bamboozles people? Maybe he's majjoonu 'Abdu Bilillah.

Maybe he's not mentally

sound.

So they identified a person by the name

of Ubba bin Rabi'ah.

Who was a leader of the Quraysh.

He was the father of Hind, bin Utba,

the one who chewed the liver of Hamza.

And of course the father-in-law,

Abu Sufyan. Hind was the wife of Abu

Sufyan.

And this 'udba' bin Rabii'ah was an extremely

wealthy man, leader among the Quraysh.

Politically influential,

internationally well connected,

well traveled. In fact, he had stood and

spoken in the courts of the major kings

and rulers of that time. He spoke in

the courts of the Roman emperor at that

time and even the Abyssinian king in Ethiopia.

So he's a man of

distinction.

So Othba

was commissioned by this group to speak to

the prophet to try to subdue him

and also to check out

is there something wrong? Or is he a

poet? Is he a magician? What is he

doing? So Utba arranged to meet the prophet

salallahu alayhi wasallam made the Kaaba

to convey the concerns that the Quraysh had

about this Islam that he brought. For example,

one of the things.

Islam was a religion preaching against the idols.

Now

people from all over Arabia came to worship

the idols at the Kaaba.

That gave the Quraysh prestige. It gave them

honor. It gave them political clout.

It brought a source of revenue for them.

People came to Makkah for that.

Now this islam was affecting their religion.

More than that, affecting their politics. And most

of all, affecting their revenue.

So Ubba

engaged the prophet salallahu alayhi wasalam at the

Kaaba. He warned the prophet

The Quraysh may take up their sword against

you. They may fight you.

Now this is the part. And the books

of Sira documents,

Muhammad

The prophet listened to Utba very carefully

without interrupting him once.

Without

interrupting him once.

And he gave Utba all the attention till

Utba had completed what he wanted to say.

The prophet then asked him,

Are you now done, oh father of Walid?

For

Audba.

Are you finished? Do you say what you

wanna say? So Audba said, no I'm

I'm done.

Then the prophet said, first

it's okay, now you listen to me.

Audba had to say yes because the prophet

listened to him very attentively. He didn't interrupt

it.

And now the prophet said, Will you listen

to me? He said, Okay.

And the prophet said,

This is the revelation for the most compassionate,

the eternally merciful.

A book whose verses are well expounded

in pure Arabic recitation

for those

who know.

Conveying good news and admonition,

yet most of the people have turned away

from it without really listening to it.

Most of the people

have turned away from it for

own.

Just listen to him. And the ayah where

he ends it, and people don't listen to

what the Quran is saying.

The prophet did not go into some kind

of argument,

insulting him, you mushrik, you kafir. Which we

would do nowadays.

Or undermine his question. Who are you to

question me? What kind of question is this?

The prophet responded with the best proof. They

wanted to know what was he really preaching.

So he didn't say anything. He read the

Qur'anic verse. He read from Surah Fusilat.

And

this response

stunned Audubah.

When Audubah returned to his people, he's also

eloquent, he's a leader, he's met kings by

the way, he traveled all over the world.

He's not some disorderly guy from Makkah, he's

a big boy.

He's at the top branch.

So he goes back to his people and

he reports to them and he says,

By God, I have heard something today the

like of which I never heard before.

I've heard something today the like of which

I never heard before.

By God, I swear I swear, this is

neither poetry

nor sorcery, nor a touch of magic.

From this incident,

we learn

to listen carefully

to what is being said before responding.

Otherwise,

you may not know exactly what you're responding

to.

Remember,

respect also begets respect.

If you do not have the decency to

listen to others,

how can you demand the right to be

heard yourself?

So, listen carefully.

Respond

appropriately.

That is the art of effective communication.

And this was exemplified

in this incident

of our beloved Prophet Muhammad, sallallahu alaihi wa

sallam, with an opponent

who came to check him out.