Ramadan & Desires #02

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Quran Weekly

Channel: Quran Weekly

Topics: Ramadan

Episode Notes

Wisam Sharieff & AbdelRahman Murphy uses a few verses from the Qur’an to give advice on controlling desires during Ramadan, and staying consistent throughout the year.

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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This audio is brought to you by Muslim Central. please consider donating to help cover our running costs and future projects by visiting www dot Muslim central.com forward slash donate.

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Salam alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh, who were by

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praise and thanks are due to Allah subhanaw taala who gave us this chance. I praise Allah subhanaw taala for giving me the opportunity to be Muslim. I praise the last panel Darla today for having the chance to have friends of praise Allah subhanaw taala because I live in a time when the world is beautiful.

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When trees and plants are green, and when people they smile when they see you. I pray the last $100 for being alive in 2011. And I pray and I ask Allah, Allah to make me amongst those who meet the people who are listening to these broadcasts. If you all think we're just talking to a screen, I've tried my best to imagine and picture where you all are at right now. Whether you're watching this now or you're listening to a recording later, I know me and Murphy would like to kick it with you sometime in sha Allah and you know did to get to know each other. But I praise and thank Allah subhanaw taala for the soul and simple fact that before we even start a rubber band prep that there

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is an opportunity and a possibility on the day of judgment that I could meet every single person whose voice

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is not I can't hear but every single person who can hear my voice I pray that we get a chance to meet in the big judgment and then when you see me and if you never met before holla at your boy and say Yo I listened to your Ramadan prep and that's what hamdulillah what got me good blessing to get to dinner and inshallah I would be honored to meet everyone and I think their money be ready to do that too. I'm downvote let me know where when inshallah inshallah by the third tree in the second Jana will all hook up inshallah we praise Allah subhanaw taala immensely for everything he gave us. Today we isn't enough our approach to the topic for Ramadan PrEP is going to start based off of the

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famous ayah that we all read and inshallah myself and brother of the ramen habit Allah Allah protect him and increase him and all that he is doing for all he has done for the community in Dallas. And what he now will take his talents towards Knoxville in sha Allah, Allah bless him tremendously there and it's the community in Knoxville listening, y'all took one of our boys so inshallah take care of him as long as y'all take care of him inshallah we'll all be happy inshallah. inshallah, for today's approach, pretty straightforward. We want to be able to speak about Ramadan, and its preparation, but maybe from a different angle today. So myself and brother of the man would like to start by

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opening up the floor to questions after we prep you with what we'd like to do. So what we're going to lay the groundwork with is a left Pernod Allah's strongest ayah in the Quran about fasting for Rue de La Nina shade banyuwangi

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nila euro new Rafi

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you have levina Amani gudivada in Kumasi.

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Oh you who believe Oh VIP club, the only group that Allah subhanaw taala talks to directly and refers to them as people who believe in him. Oh ye who say we believe in Allah and who are madly in love with the food Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Oh you believe a prescription has been prescribed for you? Good, diabolical Muslim. So the prescription reads, fasting has been ordained for you. But everyone knows that Tylenol isn't the disease. And Tylenol isn't even the cure to the disease. It's a medication that highlights some of the effects of the disease. gudivada como slamm Oh, c'mon gudivada Xena

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bombing calm. And this is not a this is not some brand new Zoloft medication that no one has ever taken before. This is not some FDA not approved. Let's try it and trial phases, medication but this is the medication that you have. We all need to take and the generations before us. Were prescribed to take it but let's keep it real guys. Not everyone. Not everyone took the medication. But the purpose of the medication large lampoon themselves

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so that with a little

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bit of effort we could obtain duck was consciousness of gods. So God has prescribed upon us an exclusive group of Muslims too fast as it was prescribed to the people before us, and let's face it, not everyone took that advice. And the purpose is so that we will with some effort look at the word Lala, it's with a little bit of effort, we will be able to fear God's punishment, have holes in his mercy, and be conscious that he and his attributes are going to be what guides us throughout our lives. Now, that's where we're going to start off today, I want you to remember, fasting is not the purpose of Ramadan. The purpose of Ramadan comes in the is just to is right after that. As you can

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tell, fasting is different medications. handling all is just what you swallow. What you want, is to be better is to feel better. And spiritually, we won't feel better until we connect with a loved one to honor the one who created us in the first place. So let's keep it real when we say fasting, Ramadan is not about fasting. As a matter of fact, Allah didn't even call him about the month of fasting. He called it in is 200. As you will see just two three eyes after this. Sha Rama born and levy was the larvae Hill for

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shawarma barn and the data feed on the trauma bond is the month of the Koran. And if you really want to pour that gold into your body into fill your heart with the diamonds and the gems of gold, and then clean out that box, make sure you Lysol down that garbage can make sure you license down that box rather. And you make sure it's clean so that you can put the best and most pure thing and aroma bond is a little odd. And hold on is about preparing ourselves by fasting and fasting if it doesn't cleanse us. If it doesn't clean us up, guys, then you all know, there's no point in the fact that we're doing. So let's go ahead, I'm going to turn it over to myself. And the other one we're going

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to talk about is 14 azzura. Ali imraan. I have 14. So early on if you want to follow along with us. Take a moment and then go ahead and put that that I have in front of you. But others might have that in front of you. Or do you have it with me as well. And for those of you who are watching on the cron weekly videos and shallow after this is put up, you guys can go ahead and look it up on cron.com in number three or number three again and number 14.

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Awesome. So we have a

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shout out to the current week week.

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Oh, that's what's up definitely are on weekly all day all night on weekly for blurting out me saying the email address of that brother and go on weekly Alhamdulillah for being around, even when they went through their ups and downs and some some of their employees got sick and whatnot. But they stuck to it, man. So we're on weekly all day all night from the law. And I'm glad I'm not the slide up with the with the ayah right now.

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Okay, awesome. So we're on Item Number 14. Myself and brother of mine want to set the stage here. We want you to all realize that a lot of panel data sets such an iron number 14 of serata in Milan, that's the third Surah Fatiha Baccarat and then the third one is going to be sort of a name on where Allah subhanaw taala tells us Do you

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see her Boucher? How

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do you know I didn't ask beautified for mankind. Now let's keep this in mind. Allah is calling the world beautiful. And the world things that are in this world are going to be beautiful guys. So let's not think of the world as this idiocy dunia filled place and cars are are disgusting. And you know the beautiful things of this world. It's all hot. No, God is saying that it's beautified. And now brother of mine and I were just gonna kind of go through the categories of what Allah subhanho wa Taala referred to as beautified loo united Nazi hobo showers that for mankind has been beautified their desires are going to lean towards you are going to be attracted to and by the mind. Am I

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correct? Is that five things or six things?

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look like? 12345? Yeah, five.

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Awesome. So we've got five things, the United Nazi hobo chahatein and, Mr.

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Guy, that's all you

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know, I was gonna say that, you know, it's five or six things the to kind of set the stage how to do some, you know, metal protected intro trauma.

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The interesting part about this is that a lot of us tend to sometimes take one of two stances, which is that we read this idea, and we kind of just read quickly over it, and we maybe put this eye on someone else. Or the other stance is that we which is the correct stance is that we look into it and we reflect upon the eye and see which one of these we have. A lot of times how it was when I were talking about this earlier actually, a lot of times when

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People are trying to reflect, especially in the month of Ramadan about the problems that they have and the ways to fix these problems. We try to look all over so we go to like Oprah, we go to Dr. Phil, we go to all these places. But what better place to look from the Quran as Sam said that this is a month of the Koran, right? So we look in the Koran we find out last month, I don't know if has, like highlighted some of the top desires and perhaps obstacles towards him, that human beings might have. In fact, he's telling us actually, this is what you're going to feel, right. So sometimes we may not even know the problems we have. That's why the beautiful that love fatale did this is

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because he says listen up mankind, these are the problems that you might have. And so this idea kind of highlights them for us to take a deeper look at ourselves, and look in the mirror and try to fix ourselves.

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Exactly. And it's not about us being wrong, but it's just about us realizing when you've got a zit on your face, if you don't recognize it, if you don't realize that it's there is not going to go away. So we have to realize that Allah, Allah beautified and made an enjoyment of this world, do you remember he refers to it as an enjoyment? Do you know did not publish or working in a Nisa he was Bernina we'll find out for you the Macondo in a survey will fit what one cradle muscle woman it will, an army One Health. And now, we're gonna break this up into a few things. But if you want to prepare for Ramadan, let's start from the right from the get go. trend we know we're not supposed to

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eat, and we're not supposed to drink and we're not supposed to take part in sexual activity with our spouses. Now there's a really strong point here. When you don't eat and you don't drink automatically, your desires, your desire to go kick it at the beach, or your desire to go watch a movie, they decrease, because your body's needing the regular food and drink that it gets. So all of a sudden, you'll find that your desires decrease. So one of the things that we want to start out here with Ramadan PrEP is start from right now the week ahead, start cutting back on what your eyes might wander towards. And we all know exactly what I'm making reference to. And I'm sure we have a

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couple of examples that will just what, what does this word women mean? Are we just not looking at women on the sheet? Or where do our eyes intertwine more with women? I mean, let's face it, Johnny Depp has got a new movie coming out. He's all that and a bag of chips. So

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true, right?

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So what we're trying what a lot of kind of floating our attention towards is undoubtedly the fact that we have to control our attention towards the opposite gender. Now, if you start doing that one week before, was that means cutting your eyes away from what you look at naturally. Or when you look at something you say, Oh Allah, I ask for protection from it. You don't say a stop for law? You don't say oh my God, oh, my god curse that? No, you say Allah protect me from that. Oh, Allah protect me and guide me from that which you made beautiful, but I want to control myself. I think brother of mine and I were talking about what is burning? And the second group of that which we are

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inclined towards, towards we're attracted towards each other. The one you want to take this one? Yeah, I mean, it would have been in the literal transition or translation, as you said, probably some sons, right. But as we were talking to our good friend and teacher, both you know a mentor, both of us know you're my mentor, my teacher, but kind of a mentor of both places. You have the Nasr Django project, and I think you guys are going to hear him on Saturday, next Saturday, I forget what exactly but inshallah he can keep an eye out for his discussion of overland prep, Comm. He let us know that you know, what to watch for how to use the knee and he doesn't just literally need your

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son's right. So yes, human beings, we do desire children. And you know, you see that families, sometimes they, they boast when they have a lot of children, you know, one of one of our good friends, you know, he has a lot of kids and he kind of like boast about it. And he's very proud about it, and something that, you know, people should be proud about. But what also, as some of the scholars have put on the highlight here, this word is that Allah subhanaw taala is not only talking about like sons, but also talking about generally just had that feeling of being part of a bigger group, right? Because we have a big family when you have a big honden, right is my indo Pak friend,

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say, when you're part of a big family, you feel you feel good, you feel great, you feel it's something that we desire to be part of a larger group. And so the last part here is saying is that like, in mankind inside of our bodies, men and women, we have this desire for the opposite gender, as well as the desire to be accepted amongst large groups, right? We want to be part of something that's bigger than ourselves, whether it be our immediate family, our extended family, or just our home users, our boys and you know, four sisters, just our girl who we hang out with. And so what's my father here is letting me highlighting is that this, this desire is, is natural, it's healthy,

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it's good for you. But as was the topic was almost seen that in the month of Ramadan, the focus should be less about other people and more about ourselves. And so we're, as we see this as part of our heart wants to be part of a larger group. Maybe

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for the month of Ramadan, we can kind of like step back a little bit. And instead of like constantly calling or hitting up our boys or our friends or some like that, or if we're hanging out, you know, the girl sister hanging out with the girls, you know, instead of like always hanging out with them and trying to like chat them up online on Facebook and everything, maybe take a few minutes or even if you can just like cut out a large percentage of your time from what you'd normally hang out with your with your posse. And and, and turn towards yourself and focus on your relationship with Allah subhanho wa Taala.

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Excellent, I totally agree with brother of mine. Everyone knows this concept of bonding of having children and I want you to think of it more like an entourage. You know, you say the bigger the star, the bigger the entourage, the bigger the posse. So, in this month of Ramadan, why don't you take the days before Ramadan. So this is prep. Number two, we're going to start guarding our eyes. And, guys, I don't know any other better way to tell you this. I'm in Southern California right now and I'm speaking to you from the Bria mall. It's one of the bigger malls of the 57. And I'm sitting in the parking lot. So I'm not going to tell you it's easy to capture what your eyes shouldn't look

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at it's it's not easy. I'm sitting here talking to you about one Nissan was burning. And I'm literally going looking left and right to try to control myself. So it's not going to be easy. But the second thing that we have a week to prepare for is go ahead and send out that little Facebook message and be like hey, to all my all my friends and everything the month of Ramadan is a month for for self reflection. So if you do hit me up and want to go out and hang out, maybe grab coffee, I might say no. Two out of the 10 times, I might say no nine out of the 10 times because I'm trying my best to read a hole or I'm trying my best to hit one of my goals, to pray for prayers in the masjid.

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I'm trying to get to my goal of memorizing hobbies or spending one hour every day in the morning and one hour everyday in the evening with my mom and my dad. That's my Ramadan resolution. So this concept of having a posse fan is going to be there, but it's a month of reflection. Allah gave us 11 months to literally have a great time and stick together and you get blessings for hanging out with your friends after a shot in the masjid. It's a blessing. But in this month, it's the month between you and Allah subhanho wa Taala and how do we know this? That it's between you and Allah? Does anyone know what the blessing for passing is? How many blessings do you get? And I was destined to

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just answered yourself but ability you know how many blessings you get for passing

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a law

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Exactly. It's one of the only let is one of the only acts of worship that God doesn't specify what you're going to get. It's so huge it's so amazing that it's between you and Allah. So let's keep this Ramadan intimate and personal with Allah and I'll take the next point that can come in this week. Let's try to control our eyes don't just stay stuck to the law say Ruby law he ministry Pani regime, and I'd like I know this is being recorded. So one of the draws that is read was read by the companions when there was a time of difficulty of their thoughts if they had a bad thoughts. This is for sisters and brothers. The da da is ooh Billahi min ash shade Bonnie men to the law he was sued

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he is a sound narration that this law was read. And if it's being recorded, you can record rewind that and play that back a couple of times. So control what your eyes are looking at by using this law. Remember that you won't have to surround your friends by yourself with your friends constantly. Don't show up to the salon, we only to hang out with your boys in the back and drink tea or sit with their girlfriends and talk about what you're doing on a day to day around. Guys. If you don't want to play the full 20 sit down and take a Koran and read take a test. Sit down or just sit down and say Allah, I might have messed up this year in English or in whatever language Evonik whatever works

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for you. Just keep it real with Allah. The next point is men and women of this world were attracted to money cash to gold and silver to big medallions to I'm literally just walked out of the coach store with my wife and we're looking at a $600 purse. Let me tell you where they go by notice or not first, but it's the world it's bling bling in the code sign is a big see that gold. So Allah subhanaw taala reminds us and heaped up treasures of gold and silver. And as every rapper always says, and I think as Rebecca Black said in her new song, it's all about the paper. I don't know what that white goes talking about all about the paper but I'm going to tell you this much. A lot has

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made this for us. So if you're working in Ramah bonds, and you have a job, you can cut back. If you're trying to spend money, cut back on what you spend on this world and start giving one cup of coffee a day one $4 Coffee

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Coffee, it is good to start across one extra thing that you do a day, maybe brothers don't go out and get a shape up four times in Ramadan, get your shape up once. Or maybe, maybe just let your beard grow. And what you would spend for $12 or $60 to have your shape up does it be given in the path of alignment? You never know what what Allah will bless you for, for making that sacrifice in the month where you can constantly give to you. So if I can just kind of jump in on this one, guys, if Allah is telling us guys and gals, if Allah is telling us that money, cash millionaires and the pursuit of gold and platinum teeth, is going to be a difficulty for us in this world. How can we

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rationalize listening to constant music that's telling us I live the life by the crab and watch people take all night? How can we do that? I'm not really sure. I think it would be best if we left the concept of gold money and cash. And also the people that call it to call us towards it. Maybe I'm being too old school of the month, you can jump in in the middle, if maybe I'm pushing the envelope on watching MTV and VH. One during the month of Ramadan. I don't know how I don't know how cool that is.

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I don't know man, I am younger than you not by that much. But I kind of agree with you on this point is that like, Listen, we all have to understand too is that like whatever we listen to, and this isn't a discussion about whether or not music is Hello, um, that's not for us to talk about right now. But we're not gonna jump into that. But I think that what we're trying to get at here is like whatever you listen to, whatever you're putting into your heart, right, your heart is like this room. And it has a lot of doors, right? One of the doors is like your ears, one of your eyes, one of your mouth. And so whatever you are allowing to go into your heart via your ears, your eyes, you

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have to realize that it's going to stay there and your heart, what does it do physically, it pumps blood to the rest of your body. And so whatever you let into your heart spiritual needs to be pumped out to the rest of your body. And so when you allow or when we allow ourselves to see that things or hear bad things. It's not just going to be the end of it right there. These things will grow into us, they will become part of us. And so when I was dealing with a lot of youth and my old machine, some kids I love very much I still love them a lot and I keep in touch with them. But they were just obsessed with Wiz Khalifa man and with Khalifa you know, Milan got into some Charlotte chick chick

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was,

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you know, we sleeper right. Like he all he raps about, it seems like he's just smoking weed. That's all he talks about. Right? Yeah, well, okay. appelman Well, like the old school, right? Like, we sleep, like he talks about, like, you know, rolling paper and all this kind of stuff. And these kids, man Subhanallah, they just like, they would show me like Yo, brother Murphy rolling paper, I'm like, yo, that means like, not quite. And like it would just be them. And then when I when I would kind of explain to them like, this is what he talked about, they wouldn't really feel and this is the scary part. If they wouldn't feel bad about it, they would just be like, oh, okay, like, and

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then we kind of grow onto them. And later on, they might actually start smoking it. So this kind of a long explanation, a long discussion. But I just think that basically, if there's one month out of the year, that we can just limit what we listen to, you know, and try to just like, try to limit it and ask yourself the question, like, if the problem of homelessness on them was listening to this with me, right? If we're just like, chillin in my bedroom, and the problem was there, and I put on this, like, my iPod on the stereo, like, would I turn it off? What I feel embarrassed if the song came on in front of him? That's really the question want to ask yourself, you can go into all the

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thick ruling color on black and white. But ask yourself the question, right, if a problem 100% I'm the man who loves you so much. And it's so much for all of you and I right, like so much blood, sweat and tears just to get this message, right? And then, you know, if he was with us, and he or we were listening to where he'd be happy, would he smile? Or would he be a little bit disappointed and want us to change? If the answer is the second answer about this appointment. And maybe for the month of Ramadan, we can cut it out. And by cutting it out, we're realizing when check yourself, you're doing a spiritual detox, you're getting whatever is inside of your heart cleaned out, like

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with some troops of the capitalist time said to put in the good, the good things that you want to put in pure things control well, later on.

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Exactly. I actually, I can almost hear some of your listening to us and saying Oh, so you want us to not listen to music, even though we're gonna listen to it after Ramadan. Hekia if there was a month to pretend, guys, remember when we were little, we would pretend to be a doctor. We used to pretend to be human. And I would run around my house with a with a paper towel rule and say I have a part I would run around. And only one of you are laughing you're human as a joint. He wore his furry underwear on the outside and that makes him a superhero. So when we played dress up as a young kid, we played it and played and we pretended and what we pretended to do when we were younger we became

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when we were older. So anyone who is right now saying man, I'm not gonna be two faced, I'm not going to be two faced. As a matter of fact, all of us are where 100 faces a day. Right now when I'm talking to you. I'm talking a certain way. When I walk into the mall and say ask my wife. Hey, the talk is done. I'm going to talk a different way does that make me to face No, I think it is a month to pretend

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I'm going to use the word pretend to be religious and say Allah I'm pretending to be religious. So can you make me the way I'm pretending? It would be the month of Ramadan guys, and I will quote you on how to use with su de la Sol along with some of the greatest human being to walk the face of the earth. The human being who when we see his name, our lips pucker, because when we see him we would have kissed him will hammer do Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, you know You like that one? I know you like that one. I like that one. Write that down. And what Facebook quote Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, when you make dua, when you lift your hands to ask God for

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something, you should cry, cry and say Allah, I really messed up, I need your help. And the Hadith says, If you can't cry, and your our hearts have become that hard, then pretend make a face. As if you're crying. Make a face as if you are saddened by what you've done. And Allah subhanaw taala will accept it as if you were as if you were as if you were crying and asking him for help. So sisters, maybe if you were a certain type of clothing outside of the Ramadan, use your chance. You are that treasure you are that angel that Alex panda sent to the earth, wear looser clothing, pull that cloak over your head, guys, you know that this is the month of Ramadan and maybe you you're a heart you

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know your mad heart and no one can disrespect you. But let's let this month be the month where someone actually can say, Yo, what happened to him? Yo, let someone say it's Ramadan. Yo, it's Ramadan. One of my friends and I won't take his name. He's a very he's a published artist right now. He has many, many records. And he told me one, when he first got into the rap game, he said, someone saw him in a club in Ramadan. And someone walked up to him. And they stepped on his shoes purposely. And he said, Bro,

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I wish you didn't do that. And it goes to what you're gonna do. And he said, I'm not gonna do anything. And everyone's like, yo, yo, what happened? And someone from the background in the crowd, another Muslim guy in the club said, it's Ramadan Yo, is going to keep us cool. Even the most hardcore people, at least it's a month for someone to say it is possible. What's going to happen September 1, September 2, God knows. But all I know is that have August 1 to August 30. And I'm going to make it happen to you guys. We have to pretend guys I'm going to go to a drink more. I'm going to pray more. Yeah hecky I'm going to have the test be out on my iPhone I have an iPhone does

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the app I'm going to be saying Swan Allah. If you want to play the part that look the part you want to be a baller and wear a rubber band on your wrist and fly your shorts if you want to be identity, then look like a suit alone.

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jump in here real quick and just give a little bit of reverse of this.

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I want to I want to ask you real quick probably sound like is there a definition? Is there like a Is there like a definition of what being religious is? Or is it just kind of like is it open? Like how do we how do we determine what being religious is? Is there like a lot to be religious? Do I have to I have to wear a white belt and grow big beard or like a sister doctor like we're like all black a job all the time. Like what is religious?

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I like that. I think I was a little vague on that too. Let's start with the number one definition of bitter of suck while religiousness in the Koran is knowing that what you're doing is right. So guys, if your heart tells you the other 11 months of the years, I shouldn't backbite and you shouldn't be backbiting if you know you shouldn't lie to your parents being religious is following the religion. That your heart Your knob says, you know this is wrong. I shouldn't be watching this. The first step to religiosity guys is before you grow your beard before you put your job on, is do the things you know that are right. Don't lie, don't cheat. The first thing is morality. But other brother of mine,

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I have to say, you can't play the part unless you look the part. You can't be walking to the muscle with super tight jeans or sagging your jeans on the ground and saying, Well, I'm religious in my heart. So the first thing is, Be true to yourself. Don't lie to yourself. If you know if you feel uncomfortable watching something, then don't watch it. If your heart says I shouldn't have lied, I shouldn't have listened to those words. They don't listen to it. But number two, the candle cannot burn. There can't be a light on top of the candle without giving off heat. You know I mean of their mind, you can't walk up to a candle and the candle be like I won't burn you. But I'm just going to

00:29:20--> 00:29:55

give you light. Everything has to give off heat if it truly is lit. So I would have to say this is our chance. We all know what religiousness is. We all know beyond just being a good person, but it also has to do with looking the part and I don't say grow your beard or automatically put on a burqa and cover your face. I'm not saying that. But we all know that we cannot bump it up a few notches. And we know what feels right. We know what feels right when we have looser clothing, when we have covered ourselves correctly. When we look at that person we think is religious and we kind of try to act like them. What do you think of them? I think I think it's very important. I think that like

00:29:55--> 00:29:59

what we said earlier about like the heart is whatever is inside of it is going to be matter.

00:30:00--> 00:30:22

unify in the body. And so like someone who can't be like a true, like, you know, Allah tells us this is kind of like a self gaze like imagine like if we all had like immense amounts of taqwa. But then we didn't like really like dress properly or talk properly. And by the way, external appearance of being someone who's close to God is not just clothing. It's also the way you talk. It's the way you walk, right? And sort of

00:30:23--> 00:30:53

describing the service of men. He says what he says they walk modestly. They spend modestly, they talk modestly, like everything they do. He described so many external factors. It's not just like, oh, they were white, or doesn't have big beards, and they was, you know, to jump shade a lot protecting Michelle. I love Jason, by the way, so it's important to remember that and I think you're right, helping with sound like we should definitely step it up a notch. Now, does that mean that again, you're gonna have to like flip the switch? No, that means that take it up some steps right? So for example, like brothers who who shop at a BB get for your T shirts, Mashallah we know that

00:30:53--> 00:31:22

you're a gym, we know that you work out every day. But maybe you show somebody that you can just wear like a looser buttoned down shirt, that covers your outer that covers your out your area that you know, when you pray, we don't want to see anything, you know, I'm saying it's like plumbers are at work when when brothers are praying and T shirts. So just make sure that you cover everything, sisters, sisters, if you're wearing tighter clothes during the rest of the year, like I said, maybe a couple of times, you know, during Halloween, especially and during the evening, or during the day or whatever, wherever you're going, just wear like looser clothing, inshallah, and try to take steps

00:31:22--> 00:31:54

towards that, again, it's very important to move towards it. I think religiosity I think that what happened was Sam was saying is that religiosity is, is a personal thing, but at the same time, we're told what it is, right? So someone can come and tell you, you're not religious, that's not their job. But we can tell ourselves that we're not religious, we can tell ourselves. So we need to look at the example of the Prophet so sometimes, and and measure ourselves against that example, inshallah. And then we can see ourselves coming closer to God and that way as well. And also, another thing during Ramadan, which is the complete flipside of this kind of discussion, is don't

00:31:54--> 00:32:24

judge people, right? A lot of us have that issue where we look at people, and we say, Oh, my God, like, outside of Ramadan, they were like, they were drinking, and they were partying, and now they're not, oh, my god, no, if that person is changing for the month of Ramadan, be there for them, right? applaud their efforts, like, dude, buy them a gift and be like, no, we're so happy that you came out of that, or, girl, we're so happy that you stopped doing that, because we don't want to push them back to where they came from. Right? If someone is coming to their Ramadan, Ramadan, like a rehab clinic, right? Well, it sounds like it's like a clinic for people who have problems, and all

00:32:24--> 00:32:46

of us have problems. So we all show up in Oregon with our problems, and we're trying to do rehab ourselves spiritual rehab. Imagine that someone checked into rehab, and they were like, oh, you're not really trying to get better. And they push them out. Oh, well, I'll try to get better. But don't don't ever be that person. Don't ever be that person to try to push someone out of Ramadan because they're trying to come in and they're trying to fix themselves and so be there for each other. We all need help we all need to help each other and that includes not judging one another.

00:32:47--> 00:33:21

Other How can you say that again? Man, I that we have example, bro, that it took me back. And you can you say that again? While they actually are doing you're going to give credit to you. And you're after a loss of autonomy? Because you because like you said like the word macaron is prescription right. It's a cure for that we have Ramadan is not just some sort of month, but rather siyam. Fasting is like a medicine for the problems that we have when you take medicine when you're sick. So we're all we all have spiritual problems. So last month, I was saying what take this take medicine takes Liam. So when we pixley. And when we take medicine of fasting, Ramadan actually ends up being

00:33:21--> 00:33:47

like this hospital, this clinic, this rehab clinic, where 11 months out of the year, we have these problems that we're trying to fix ourselves. And so we all show up to the clinic together, we all pray together, we break fast together, we fast together, we do all these things together. And that's exactly how we have clinic is not that I haven't experienced. But that's exactly how it works is that you have to work in groups. And so don't ever push anyone outside of the group because they're trying to get better. And if you push them out of the group that you might have to answer for why they didn't get better.

00:33:49--> 00:34:28

panteleimon. And on that note, both of them are mine. And I want to say something to you guys. And it's probably not going to be the most popular thing. But you have to realize one thing, if I'm going to go to an exclusive restaurant, if I'm going to go to a basketball game, I have to realize there were people at that restaurant at the stadium before I was so when you decide to go to the masjid and you get there and someone older looks at you and says, Why aren't you wearing Hijab young lady? What's wrong with you, brother stop talking in the back, stop texting. You have to realize out of the 11 months, the 11 months that Ramadan wasn't around, those older people were in the machine

00:34:28--> 00:35:00

the whole month, fam. So all of a sudden you decided to become religious and now everyone has to jump on board with you. It's not gonna work like that. The world is going to give you a little bit of a tough time. So if I can for myself as the oldest person here right now I'm just going to say can you give the moms and dads the aunties and uncles the Armisen and Mama's a little bit of break, if they give you if they roll their eyes at you or they look at you up and down. smile at them. It's a month of fatherhood, it's a month of charity for all of those years.

00:35:00--> 00:35:37

You did whatever you wanted, whether you knew it was right or wrong, you do whatever you want. You can't show up to the machine and be like, yeah, accept me for who I am. It ain't America, it's the images. So the people in the machines might not, they might not have exactly the same concept that you do. So the same way I know we're talking about making the step and not listen to music, but no one is going to know how much you're doing except a loss to allow my test with the uncle saying, Get out. Please don't talk in budget. Don't talk to just smile. I want you to smile as soon as you hear their voice. As soon as you hear the artist saying Oh, oh, why did you wear this? Why do you look

00:35:37--> 00:36:17

like this? Just smile, shake their hand to insha Allah and trying and if you could all repeat it with me right now to say in sha Allah, I am trying. So that will help you. I mean, I mean, so those are the few things that we wanted to bring up. And the next to the next two points of the IR are very straightforward. And that again, we're reading it number 14, we're going to end up here have their money. Okay, can I kind of wrap it up here? I'm good. Go for it. And then we'll wrap it up together until at the end go for Okay, nope, no problem. So we got the well branded horses and horses of Hi Mark. I mean, Allah subhanaw taala telling you made beautiful in this world are all of

00:36:17--> 00:36:56

the things of this world and well branded horses. What is the icon for a Ferrari? It's a standing stallion, Allah subhanaw taala knows that we love these things. So I'm going to give you my Ramadan resolution after this. And that is my Ramadan resolution, because I watch a lot of YouTube clips on, you know, the audio. The excuse me the automobile section. I'm always checking out which Ferraris coming out or what cars coming out. I Ramadan resolution is going to be to tackle this one. And that is going to be I'm going to try my best not to watch the automotive section of YouTube or waste any time on YouTube at all because I'm a big I don't got a TV to watch because I'm traveling, but I

00:36:56--> 00:37:06

watch a lot of clips on YouTube. How many of you saw that ridiculous clip of that lady? I'm on the toilet. I'm on the toilet. I'm like that was ridiculous. But I still watch. My point is

00:37:07--> 00:37:39

there's some weird some weird clip bro. No, my point is I'm trying to tell you that. That's my Ramadan resolutions. And other one and I will tie up here the other two things are cattle and land. The food loss and low audio Sallam gave us a reminder of how much to eat. What do we do with cattle? We farm the land which we eat from or we eat the cow. So yes, food is going to be exotic. And brother of the month I was just telling him that I was introduced to a professional trainer. But the other man his name was Ray Han

00:37:42--> 00:38:14

what's what's it? Oh, Ron Jalali? Yeah Rehan Jalali? Yeah, I just met him yesterday and he was like, Oh, you know, he's gonna be giving a talk in our mustard on July 30. This Friday, talking about the importance of eating healthy in Ramadan. Some of us have them and you can tell me if you agree some of us actually end up gaining weight in Ramadan or eating more food because we eat double during our time am I wrong? Oh, it's totally the truth everyone and Ramadan that's the time where we gain weight rolawn is like the anti Jenny Craig Ramadan is like

00:38:16--> 00:38:29

instead of like shoving You know, I'm saying like, Ramadan is crazy. It's like that, you know, because it's not like that because it was made like that. It's like that because we make it that way. And so I think the reminder you're giving us great is that tone it back right self discipline, that's excellent.

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self discipline. That's all we got to do. A lot behind Donna reminds us to eat less to control what we want to eat when you break your fast is all I recommend. Hear the other ones have a few days, a little bit of milk and then go Primavera. Don't delay your don't eat a whole bar and then pretty much grip and then have dinner because then you won't have any thoughts. It's always a few days, a glass of milk, maybe some juice. Those of you who you know want to get something like to eat but don't make the first thing you eat when your stomach is empty for 16 hours of fried things because your body is going to absorb it immediately. To try to wait brother Ray Han was saying try to stay

00:39:11--> 00:39:38

away from the dried food especially when your stomach's empty he fried food the other month of the year. And the last thing is to land and that is to acquire more and more land. I think the best part of us pilots ended up here he says that he cannot hire to do all this may be enjoyed in the in the life of this world. You can enjoy it in this life. But what more were in the war? No.

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But with a loss are more beautiful spouses for us guys and girls in general are more beautiful and more loyal posses in the hereafter are more beautiful golden silver and the cups of Jenna will be like a less printed dollar pointed out in four places and they'll put on will be like crunk cups

00:40:00--> 00:40:39

Little wait a little, there will be beautiful diamond and Emerald encrusted gold cups. So we can drink wine. And we will have better Ferrari's better bodies and Jenna with a better food, massive land. All if we act according to what Allah, Allah wants from us, it's time to get ready for Ramadan. And inshallah we'd like to open up. Sure, but a man wants to. And then a few closing points on what we've been talking about. Yeah, I think deserve a fair Hello sound like I'm you, you really would This is when we were talking earlier today about what to talk about I was at a blank and you were just kind of like you brought this up and I was looks upon alum and it hits, it hits it on the

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head, right, as of last month, it always does. Like, it's always perfect. And so I really appreciate and I'm sure everyone else does. So I want to thank you on behalf of everyone else. I know you're busy, and you have a lot of work to do over there. And so Cal, you know, a lot of you know, Jim tanning and laundry get done judicial reference takes care of inshallah, but I really appreciate you doing that. And it really benefited myself as well as I think the rest of the audience, just kind of a reminder, and I took this from some of my teachers about Ramadan. And I know we signed about this, let's meet earlier, but I just want to kind of reiterate it is that what's interesting about Ramadan

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is the the, the objects or the things that Allah spawn, tada takes away from us, right? So if we ask yourself, like, what are the things that I lost? My father says that we can do during the daylight hours and Ramadan? The answer are a few things. But the biggest ones that we know are three things, right? It's food, drink, and intimate relationships with our spouse. What's interesting about those things is that and I asked you all this question, obviously, rhetorically, because you can't answer it right now. But are those things normally permissible for us during the daylight hours during the 11 months of the year? The answer is yes. We can only do what we can, right without right. We can

00:41:46--> 00:41:58

eat all we want. Yeah, we can, we can drink all we want. And we can enjoy our spouses, you know, wives can do their husbands and vice versa. All they want, right. In fact, we get good deeds for doing these things. Right. So what interesting is that what why does start we're gonna say,

00:41:59--> 00:42:32

Yes, I agree with you. Definitely. Right. So what's interesting is that, why did the last month Allah choose these few things? Right? There's two reasons that the scholar stay right. None of the first one is very motivational. The first one is something that I think that if we hear it, it'll really pump us up. And that is this a lot politics away things that are helpful for us, he takes away things that are normally permissible for us to make to enable us to prove to ourselves that we can definitely stay away from the hot tub. Right? staying away from a lot of things is very difficult, because we're used to having them we're used to them being permissible, but when a large

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quantity takes them away for 30 days, and no one comes near food, right? Even the Muslims who even even you know, it's there, some of us will maybe we don't pray, right, some of us will miss prayer regularly. With there's one thing make sure we do to Ramadan, if we don't eat, we don't drink and we stay away from things, there are people who are addicted to smoking. Chainsmokers, right. So So and my closest friends actually are like addicted to cigarettes during Ramadan, during the daylight hours, they do not pick up a cigarette. And that just shows you that if you can stay away from these things during the daylight hours, then during the other 11 months of the year, you can definitely

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stay away from everything else. So if we have these mistakes that we make, if we make a mistake, let's say that I backed by, or I cheat or lie or steal, or let's say that someone you know, albula, they look at pornography, or they talk to people they shouldn't be talking to where they're dealing, because they shouldn't be dealing. If you can stay away from these few things electronically, it's proving to yourself, that you can definitely stay away from the other things during the rest of the time. The other thing is beautiful. And this is gonna take a little bit is gonna take like 20 seconds, but you got to stick with me. The other point is that when we're eating and drinking,

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right, we're satiating our body, we're taking care of our needs. Now, if we hold back from that food and drink, that we are no longer taking care of those needs and those desires and we feel a feeling of hunger and thirst. Now, when you have the feeling of hunger and thirst, hunger was when you get hungry, you get thirsty. Can you ever tell your stomach to just like shut up? No, no, you can't. Right? You can't it's it's impossible. Like when you want to buy a Ferrari was on you tell yourself No, not right now. To have every day. Yeah, even felucca right every day. So we have these other desires. You can stay away from them. You can tell yourself you can convince yourself say no, not

00:44:08--> 00:44:15

right now. Right you are today I went to the store and I wanted to buy something I told myself No, not right now. Six months is your interest? No, not right now. Right?

00:44:16--> 00:44:49

When you're missing food and drink, you can't tell yourself No, you can't say be quiet stomach. You can't. It's just going to keep bothering you and bothering you. So how does that relate to fasting and how does that relate to taqwa being close to Allah? Allah subhanaw. taala is showing us here that in the same way that your stomach cannot keep bothering cannot stop bothering you. You can't tell your stomach to be quiet. This is the same amount of reflection that we should have towards a lot. Your stomach cannot stop thinking about food. Your stomach is constantly re thinking quote unquote, about food. It always wants food and drink during the day. We're supposed to equate that

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that hunger and that thirst to how hungry and thirsty we are for a relationship with God. That is what's supposed to motivate us towards Allah. We think we're fine, man. I'm really hungry, man. I can't wait hold star

00:45:00--> 00:45:31

They were supposed to really also think man I came with agenda. I really want to be with the Prophet Muhammad was adamant that hunger and thirst is supposed to motivate us towards closeness to God. So when you have that feeling of hunger and thirst during the daylight hours, and you feel man, I can't wait to have tar. Also say to yourself, actually see these this phrase, I cannot wait to Agenda I can't wait to be alone, because that's what the hunger thirst is pushing towards. So I really I hope all of us in Sharla can benefit. I know that I myself benefited from probably some awesome explanation of the ayah and also from being able to just hear from him and hear his quote on

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recitation. I know that Irvine is going to be very lucky to happen there inshallah. So anyways, I hope that we can all benefit from each other and the recordings and YouTube inshallah, thank you to cron weekly for putting them up and I guess right now who was on we're gonna open it up for some q&a.

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Definitely, inshallah. lafonda bless you and everyone who was here, again, Knoxville, if you can do your best to take care of my family. I would greatly appreciate it inshallah. We are definitely undoubtedly, all the speakers who travel and speak and stay away from their family members for a while they become each other's family. So please take care of my family members, I would really appreciate that. inshallah we turn it over for a question and answer and leave on that phrase that if you can stay away from the halau things, if you can stay away from housing, food and drink and whatever Allah has made allowed for you during the 11 month, if you can stay away from it for the

00:46:23--> 00:46:40

month of Ramadan, then you will be able to stay away from haram things. A hookah lounge won't look so fantastic. Come September 1. If Allah subhanaw taala keep asking for his guidance. I'll talk to you all soon. inshallah. If there are any questions about the law, you can explain how we will do that.

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So inshallah we'll switch gears to some q&a right now. Obviously, there's, there's some interesting ones, which I won't mention, but the ones that I can at least read over the phone, I will do that in sha Allah. There's one gentleman,

00:46:55--> 00:47:04

one lady from Houston, one Solomon from from California asking the same question. They're new Muslims. Their family thinks,

00:47:05--> 00:47:26

you know, the family didn't mention if they're supportive or not supportive, but they basically said that the family thinks fasting is going to be too hard for them. This is their first Ramadan, should they go go ahead and fast? Or, you know, telling their family which which may cause some sort of a rift? Or should they go ahead and fast without telling their family but you're supposed to be honest in Ramadan? So please explain this a little bit.

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of their mind, is it okay, shall I started? Would you like to take down, please?

00:47:35--> 00:48:22

Okay. Hamdulillah, Allah is the Greatest Knower of everything clean and pure. But there's an both sisters who are sisters who are listening to this question. This is not relative. obedience to your parents is of the utmost, Allah subhanaw taala even points out in Surah lokman, I am number 12, through 19. In is 16, specifically 3116, that even if your parents encouraged you to do wrong, and they're non Muslim, to deal with them, or for Nia now to deal with them the best of fashion. Now, sometimes the best of fashion means to be polite in the truth. So tell them I agree with you. My first one, Milan can be pretty tough. How about we do this, I'm going to start fasting for the first

00:48:22--> 00:49:01

three days. And if you want to, you can join along with me. But if it's too tough, don't worry about it, and we'll reevaluate it in three days. Now, what you need to do is keep asking Allah throughout those first three fasts, Allah give light on my face, Allah give me energy, give me strength. So your family will actually perceive you to be more energetic and more healthy. So that is the first answer to your question. The second is, maybe there is an actual truth in what your parents are saying. I don't know whether the two of you, maybe you have your parents know that you have a medical issue. Could be a stomach issue could be in anemia, it could be many things. So I'd like you

00:49:01--> 00:49:29

to evaluate your own health as a step two, and listen to don't think that your parents are non Muslim doctors. That's why they don't want you to pass. Maybe there is a reality. And in that case of law says and not too fast, that a lot doesn't mean you're fast. If it's going to make you sick, the person who dies from fasting dies, a disliked a disliked fast. If you're not meant to fast, it's going to make you sick. So first things,

00:49:30--> 00:50:00

play in a polite tone with your parents and say, I'm going to try it out for three, four days. And after the fourth day, if you do feel if you do feel good, tell them I feel healthy, and I want to keep doing it. You know that and they will see that you gave it a little bit. Secondly, check your own house and God is the greatest Knower of everything clean and pure. But also talk to your parents put this fast. This is number three, say on the third day they say no, we still don't want you to do it. Tell them look there are five obligatory things in my religion that I

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Have to do. Now even if they tell you Okay, you can do these other things, you can go to the mustard every day say I agree with that. But these are one of the things that God has asked me to do. And then quote the Bible, we fast during Lent, quote the Torah we fast on on the day before the Sabbath or the day of the Sabbath. So, fasting has been a part of our Abrahamic culture for over 4000 years. And, but don't be challenging. Just remember, you're still their kid, you didn't you became Muslim to the world around you, you're still just you to your parents, you're still the person who they change the diaper. So don't get too rational or don't get too challenging. Please try to do your

00:50:44--> 00:51:09

best as God says in the Quran is 16 to 31 deal with them in the softest of fashions and deal with them or Sahiba Huma dunia now hufa, I can't even give you a translation with softness, love, compassion, and remember that they will come around eventually, they may not come around immediately in the beginning. I hope that answers your question. And Allah knows everything that's

00:51:11--> 00:51:12

like for her.

00:51:14--> 00:51:15

There's a lot of questions about

00:51:17--> 00:51:37

viewing the opposite gender. So there's, there's questions about what's permissible. You know, obviously, we're supposed to lower the gaze. But let's say you know, you're in a classroom, you're with a professor, there's somebody that comes over your house to fix the AC or the cable. What can you look at? And what was the practical advice there was to balance their

00:51:42--> 00:52:21

other hand, I will only say one sentence, and I'll let others take care of the more technical aspects. Look at someone as much as you'd feel comfortable someone looking at your sister or brother. Even if it's your professor, look at her as long as you would feel somewhat uncomfortable someone looking at your sister if she's a professor, and what am I very close, my sister's friends very close. And she's like my older sister therapy. She's a professor in book in Baruch University. If someone was looking at her uncomfortably I would feel uncomfortable. So look at the opposite gender as you would feel comfortable, someone looking at your family members, and there's actual

00:52:21--> 00:52:56

Hadith and Quran to discuss this. But let's take it back to the heart for a second. Look at someone or the AC guy or even the girl in your accounting class, or someone in your high school. Look at them as much as you would feel comfortable someone looking at your sister or brother. And that's for as long as you would need the booty, the guru, the necessity to talk them like Hey, what's going on? I need this. I hope you have a good day. Thank you so much. You don't need to be a hard nosed. I can't look at you. You're forbidden. You're an infidel. Don't be a dork. Be polite. And inshallah look at them. As long as you're you would feel comfortable. Come on looking at your brother or

00:52:56--> 00:53:01

sister, but of the other brother of the Romans knows better about these classes.

00:53:02--> 00:53:05

I think I don't know why no better at these things. Without no joking.

00:53:06--> 00:53:11

Do you deal with the youth more? Like everyone knows more about looking at women?

00:53:13--> 00:53:50

Excellent. That was a great answer. I think that, you know, it's these questions like these kind of kind of confuse me a little bit because I know we do we have a kind of a legal code in Islam that we live by, right we have Islamic legal rulings that we live by. But I like what half of the Some say that isn't the conventional view here for anything where there's like, can we bring a law back into the into the equation? Like, as Muslims were like, we're focusing so much on like, coming with a timeout timer was caught on? But like, can we can we talk about God for a second? Right? So yes, we can if I mean, if I told you right now, if there is proof that I'm so and so said that looking at

00:53:50--> 00:54:25

women is permissible as long as you want? I mean, will you go do it like knowing that, you know, it's not going to be good for you? So let's, let's take this logic law, and let's contextualize it with God, right. So for example, we know that we are not, we are not permitted as men or women to stay or to look at the opposite gender lustfully. And that we need to do it as a means or as a as a necessity to get things done right, for example, but ask yourself the question like you're asking us the question now, like what is permissible? What is impermissible? Ask yourself the question like what is permissible isn't permissible, right? For the purpose of some sort of specific conduct, ask

00:54:25--> 00:54:59

your heart, what do you feel, unless I finally gave human beings the amazing ability to be able to kind of like, have the, the inclination towards good right, the physical laws we know, in Islam, we as Muslims have this innate desire to be pure and to be good, and that's called the physical. So ask yourself and stuff to come to ask your heart as the Prophet for themselves. Whether or not you think it is good, right? And along with that, and this is I'm just repeating with my son, my teacher, Sham messaging, who said, along with that also teamed up with a local email if you need to know the legal aspect of it. The answer I just gave right now was for all the people who already know the ins and

00:54:59--> 00:54:59

outs of the legality. They

00:55:00--> 00:55:31

I just want to hear it right. But if you if you don't, if you honestly don't know the legal aspect of it, like what Islam says about looking at the opposite gender, then go ahead and go to someone that you trust, a learned person that you trust, whether it be a scholar or speaker or an email, and ask them, you know, what is it? What are the Islamic parameters of looking at the opposite gender? And at the same time, ask yourself the question like, what would a law be happy with? Would he be happy with me just staring at this guy? Or staring at this girl? Right? All these people, brother, Brad Pitt, you know, staring at him all day long? No, you got to put God back in the equation and

00:55:31--> 00:55:32

ask your heart and Sharla

00:55:36--> 00:55:37

does like a long fade. And

00:55:39--> 00:56:22

moving on to the next question, though, there's many great questions coming in like the one we just like the one that the two speakers just answered. And other one that I'd like to throw out there that I think is relevant, is there's a mother talking about her child, she's in middle school, her daughter's in middle school, and her daughter's gone to Islamic school all her life. But, you know, she was bought an iPad, as she shows by an iPod, I'm sorry. And the mother expected that she would have on there or on and she's and whatnot. What the mother discovered on the iPod was was not that she discovered something, source of music and whatever else may be on there. She's mentioning that

00:56:22--> 00:56:28

she had been going to Islamic school, you know, what else can I do? How else can I keep my kids on Islam?

00:56:31--> 00:56:35

The the how to resolve view. And if I take a stab at this one, all yours.

00:56:36--> 00:56:44

Okay, I'm about all mine. But, okay. This is something that I was actually having discussion with someone earlier today, the Islamic school fallacy.

00:56:46--> 00:57:27

Islamic school is not going to raise our Muslim children. Islamic school is not going to, it's not going to teach them the ins and outs of their faith. Islamic school is simply an institution, which is meant to preserve what is already there. So the home the family, parents, moms and dads, and brothers and sisters are meant to build the the the fundamental Muslim in the children, the child, right? They're meant to build the love of Allah, the love of the Prophet, the level following the the, the Islamic school is just going to preserve what is already there. Right? The farm school is not going to add or a money are not going to add or take anything away. Right. So I think what's

00:57:27--> 00:57:31

important is to number one is to not expect that Islamic school is going to

00:57:32--> 00:58:09

protect your daughter from Justin Bieber. mailonline like guide him, right? Never say never, he might never say never. The second thing is that the Islamic school is not going to change. A kid or a son or daughter was put into summer school as like a rescue mission, right? Oh, my God, my son or daughter was caught baiting this guy or girl, I'm going to put them to Islamic school and hopefully they change. No, that's not going to happen. What needs to happen is honest, and respectful conversation with our children. Right? So we need to speak to them, not as if they are our peers, but as if they're adults. If you look at any kid, especially you said, you know the questions that

00:58:09--> 00:58:11

middle school right, I'll go Middle School.

00:58:13--> 00:58:43

Yep, sorry, I was on. Yep. Middle School, okay, middle school kids, they have this desire to be treated like an adult. That's why whenever a middle school kid gets treated like a kid, the complaint they always give is Why do you keep treating like I'm a kid? Well, the answer is because you are a kid. But as parents and as people who are older, older boys and siblings, we have to understand that they desire to be treated like they're independent. And so treat them like that. they'll realize that they're not independent, but begin to treat them like that. So have a good conversation with your daughter asked her what are the things that you're listening to? Maybe go to

00:58:43--> 00:59:14

go to a lyrics website and say, Can we read the lyrics together? See how bad the lyrics are? Or if they're not that bad or whatnot, and go through them and ask her, don't tell her what she's doing is wrong. let her tell you what I'm doing is wrong. Let her say mom what I'm doing is wrong. Right. So go to the website, read lyrics with her listen to the song, listen to the songs have her understand that you need to treat her with that level of respect for her to make that respectable decision. Otherwise she's not going to do it. And also as well make sure that the company she's hanging around with is good people make sure she has good friends make sure that you know you're making life fun

00:59:14--> 00:59:47

for her in Islam is not just some boring thing. Make sure that you're able to have some good Muslim company for it to be surrounded by And last but not least make an offer make an offer all of us inshallah but also at the same time don't don't consider this to be like that your your daughter's beyond hoping that it's all over with no she listens to music. It's over with no, you know, kids go through phases, people go through phases. Some of the greatest companions of the puppets this level was alcoholic and murderers. So be thankful that your daughter's an alcoholic and a murder. But also don't give her like you know, don't cut her loose and say okay, she's done with no either for me

00:59:47--> 00:59:49

that her support for her, but also encouraged which was good.

00:59:53--> 00:59:59

Thank you for that answer from the law. I've actually seen a lot of kids that they I was teaching fit.

01:00:00--> 01:00:03

The same mustard for the Refine Murphy was

01:00:04--> 01:00:36

was youth director and unfortunately, Knoxville, Tennessee, still it away from us. But anyway, something a lot better. Whatever is better for the farm Murphy and the communities and right now, in any case, I was teaching some kids sh T. And it was really interesting to see that if I treated them, like like they were, you know, just some high schooler, it would really have an effect on that day's the class that they wouldn't really participate with. If I treated them like they were adults. If I empowered them, they were all about the class.

01:00:38--> 01:00:41

So moving on to other questions.

01:00:42--> 01:01:17

There's a question. There's questions about motivation. You know, how do we keep ourselves motivated throughout Ramadan? day one, we're very good, they do a very good, they, you know, 19 we don't know what we're doing anymore. Is this still Ramadan? So how do we how do we keep ourselves motivated? And along with that, if somebody wants to keep motivated, somebody at that level, where they're from the laws are motivated and want to keep focused on the bother, then there's other things like istar parties that are being invited to that they don't necessarily want to go to how do they keep away from that? So how did they get motivated and they're motivated, how do they keep away from things

01:01:17--> 01:01:18

that will keep and get them away from motivation?

01:01:28--> 01:02:08

Outside of phenomena so first thing is you have to surround yourself by constant activity. Did you notice that and again, you can look at this conveniently but Allah subhanaw taala knows that the human being that word Baris, right, we're naturally weak so he didn't give it a month of Ramadan. He actually broke for the month of Ramadan into into three parts. So start focusing activities because by the time the 10th day of Ramadan comes around your attention, and your ability has dwindled away. So what I would recommend that you do is break off the month of Ramadan into the three parts and we know it's forgiveness, mercy, mercy, forgiveness and protection from the hellfire. Am I wrong there

01:02:08--> 01:02:08

below?

01:02:13--> 01:02:20

mercy though immersi spent the first 10 days of Ramadan reading the IRS about you know Quran about Allah, the tour

01:02:21--> 01:03:07

and and surah Hadid are 57 spend the first six is the just talk about Allah spend the first 10 days of Ramadan just praising Amar a rough man Rahim. The next 10 days asking for forgiveness, reading surah Ali Amman in Surah Nisa an ayah 2627. When Allah subhanho wa Taala says, you read the Lord, will you be enough comb that Allah wants to make things clear, he loves you, he wants to forgive you. And that's why he created this. Again, I'm kind of fast forward into it, but change up the activity. And the third part of Ramadan, start to confess the sin. First protection from the Hellfire means a lot I lied to my mother in law or law. I was disrespectful to my friend and I said

01:03:07--> 01:03:47

these words, and then ask for forgiveness from them. So change up the activity number two, and I'm not plugging anything I just heard about this online called radio Rama bond. They're all British. They're all Scottish. God only knows if you'll actually be able to understand them. But I thought it was really cool. Last year for 30 days. Radio Rama bond, I think is.com dotnet. They broadcast to the Internet, and they're in Glasgow, throughout Europe. And it goes throughout from run. So just like you want to stay focused. You want to get into the zone, you listen to the radio, you listen to Dr. Ford, you listen to different avenues. Listen to a radio station constantly talk about glenavon.

01:03:47--> 01:04:13

And the third level I'm going to have to tell you is constantly listen to talks on Ramadan. If you can look up the word, the benefits of Ramadan, listen to Dr. Assad. Dr. For most deductee has some toxic no mine is defined as it i'm sure myself and others mine will be doing on the benefits of Ramadan, keep looking them up and keep you have to keep refreshed. So change it up, keep your activities changed up and keep your activities

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varying throughout the three grades from Oban, that would be excellent. And if you don't mind, I'm just going to leave a final word for the Auntie who was dealing with her daughter. Remember, this is the exact advice that my mom did with me. Don't keep any secrets from me. It was my mom's whole thing. And when I did once in a while, keep something from her. She sat down and said we're going to listen to this song together and encourage you to read the lyrics and that's the right thing to do. My mom chose to go a little bit more guerilla style. And we sat down and she said do you think this is okay? And I was like No, ma'am. Do you think this is okay? No, ma'am. And then when she was done,

01:04:49--> 01:05:00

she never said stop listening. She just let me say this was incorrect. And back then it was move this and shake that nowadays it's a little bit more. So what I would

01:05:00--> 01:05:22

Like you to do in Scotland is remember that your child is not going to jahannam because of one thing. And everyone goes through phases. And when you were younger, we all listened to what we listened to whether it's Bollywood or let our own costume, whatever it was, we all listened to it then to help the children understand for the long term, not correct the one state long term and very up your Amazon.

01:05:24--> 01:05:34

Yeah, and I think that just to add on to that point, because I had this issue when I was younger, as well. And even up until this point, I think we all do is like we all might get burned out during Ramadan, one of my teachers,

01:05:35--> 01:06:09

he told me that Ramadan, the first 20 days is a preparation for the last 10 days, right? Because the last 10 days, the last 10 days of Ramadan, hold something which is more precious than, you know, as they say, at three years, or 1000 months, and the last one doesn't look on, right list of causes. And so the first 20 days of Ramadan is kind of like the beginning part of that marathon race when you start jogging, or start running or working out. You don't just start sprinting right away. Or if you're lifting weight, you don't start lifting as much as you can right away. You go slowly, you build up right. So the first 20 days is going slowly and building up. Right You don't stay up all

01:06:09--> 01:06:41

night on the first night Ramadan, praying, praying, praying, no, you build up slowly. The point is, you want to get to the last 10 days of Ramadan in your strongest you don't want to burn out by 20 days. You want to get the last 10 nights in your strongest form where you can perform the best where you can make the most prayer the most and inshallah hit that night that will come there because that's really what we're aiming for. We're aiming for is that night little called the whole of Ramadan is amazing and beautiful. But there's a call there is really what we're aiming for in inside the Muslim Ummah as well. So you're the first 20 days as a preparation as a primer as a an

01:06:41--> 01:06:55

appetizer, so to speak, right as a spiritual appetizer for the main course was less than nice inshallah. And I hope and I asked Allah, that he allows us to make it through the model. I'm about to make it to it, to make it through it, and allow us to see the so called the control and benefit from it. I mean,

01:06:59--> 01:07:44

I mean, thank you for that answer. Moving on to some, some fifth questions. And if these questions are something that you would rather have somebody else answer just let me know. And we can move on to other questions. Three questions that came up. And they came up in different wordings, again, and again. When are we supposed to start fasting? What age group? That's number one. Number two is, if I, you know, if I just started praying, or if I started praying about a year ago, and before that, I didn't pray at all How do I make up the missed prayers? And number three is to call for sisters. You know, brothers set up tents in last 10 nights of Ramadan in the massages. She she's read into

01:07:44--> 01:07:56

Imodium that volume and i said i'm also used to take a pick up so can woman take it off? So again, what age do we start passing at? 10? Can I make up prayers and how, and it's a copper sisters.

01:08:00--> 01:08:13

I think I think I would I would personally be more comfortable if Hopper was entered? Or if she shook up the mouse or answered it later on. If you guys asked these questions to him later on inshallah, then he can answer it. Yeah, I'm not I'm not a multi modal.

01:08:16--> 01:08:30

I take the same stance, but my lab did not as encouraged me to stay practical in these things and try so that these questions should be written down. Listen to mine, I've done lots of talk. If you just started spraying, then you should you should try to

01:08:32--> 01:08:39

just look at it this way. Man, if you started a brand new job and you were making millions of dollars, you'd be like, Hey, I just started Can you just pay me less?

01:08:40--> 01:08:55

You know, you know that if you could, you would try to do your own. And fasting is not going to be that tough to space it out. It's like not eating lunch and having a late dinner. My recommendation is to try even if you just started and how do you make up the myths there's

01:08:56--> 01:09:40

a lot of data has given mankind. So now sometimes we look at the extra prayers that we do. During the day. Like before the heard the noon prayer, there's four or two to pray. Sometimes we look at that as a burden. Those are the ways for us to make up our prayer. That's the number one thing that you'll have that if you do have the Mr. Rogers and Zohar, pray the two. So number four fudger credit to voluntary prayers before pleasure so that you can so that it can be added up to your account for the ones that you missed. Finally, and you guys I want all you guys and gals listen to this carefully. Eric app or the seclusion in the mustards is not mandatory for women, a B erotica, for

01:09:40--> 01:09:59

women in the time of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam was done in their home. It was done in their homes and you can see I'm sure you'll be waiting for narrations of the time that it was done in the mud. And that was when there was proper supervision of their of their spouses. And let me just I'm going to go all the way out there and say this

01:10:00--> 01:10:41

It was also the time of etiquette of the Prophet from Mario solemn right now we're still dealing with whether we've heard your job or we shouldn't wear his job, then they covered themselves and the relationship between men and women is very different. So if you quote to anyone and women stayed in erotica or season mustard for that many days, it was a different time. And there was a different sense of self respect. No one said well I want to pray up in the front. We do live in a slightly different time era take up as my family did it when I was younger my mom still does it till today and I'm sure of their mom's mom has is always in a state of worship of Allah Allah and that is

01:10:42--> 01:10:58

staying at home finding a room finding seclusion reading Quran there and that right there is your job that's right there is your Jihad being controlling herself and staying at home and Allah knows best I would react these questions to a grand jury scholar which will be on Monday Abdullah

01:11:01--> 01:11:05

that's right Monday traveler okay to have an officer and Allah knows but

01:11:09--> 01:11:40

there's some there's some questions around this clarification almost five six questions came in like that you were talking about you know what when you when you're trying to do something act like like like you want to do that thing for example if you want to be religious in Ramadan at least act like a religious so people are asking questions that at least five or six came in. You know, is this acting Is this right? You know, are we are we lying to ourselves and the whole pretending to cry pretending to be more religious? Can you go over that just a little bit more?

01:11:42--> 01:11:48

quickly just cut I know it's disrespectful, but I just kind of want to cut in because I think that I understand where the misconception is.

01:11:50--> 01:11:51

All yours.

01:11:52--> 01:12:26

Okay. I don't think however, was a mistake, pretend. I think he did he maybe verbally think pretend. But how do we sound Are you meaning like, try it out? Like Like, don't basically like, like, play the part essentially, like, try it out. Don't pretend in the sense that you're just gonna, you're just doing it for fake reasons. But try it out. Right. Like if you want to start wearing hijab, try it out on the lawn. If you want to start praying five times a day, try it on Ramadan. Is that what you're talking about? That is exactly what I was talking about. If you guys don't like the word pretend, which I remember I said like when we were little. When we were little. We were pretending

01:12:26--> 01:12:46

we're doing make believe. If you're going to try something else, try it out in Ramadan. I there was a great TLC TV show where a non Muslim girl tried wearing Hijab for three days. Was she pretending No, she was just trying something else. But I'm saying if you're going to do something 100% give it in the month of Ramadan. That's all I can say.

01:12:49--> 01:13:25

And remember, if I would say Remember, if I was Satan, I would play the card. It'd be like, hey, this guy doesn't know what he's talking about. You don't want to be too fazed. Looks a pawn doesn't want you to try the sweetness of Mr. Trey bond doesn't want you Satan doesn't want you to feel like wait a minute. I don't feel pressed when I wear a job. Wait a minute, I don't feel bad when I go to the mustard to pray. shavon doesn't want you to feel that. So he's telling you, Oh, look at that guy. He's two faced, he was at the lounge last week. And now all of a sudden, he's you know, he's not acting so hard. It's the way shape on plays his game guys. I am I'm actually going to stick by

01:13:25--> 01:13:38

my word of mine was very polite to rectify my statement. Now I'm going to say pretend I'm going to say a lot. I'm protec as a hadith says, make the face that you're crying. Pretend you're crying make the face that you are. So that's my recommendation.

01:13:42--> 01:13:57

And solid. This is the last question. And after that, if you guys have any closing remarks, please go ahead and follow with how to wrap up in the next four minutes here. We've gone a little bit over our time. The question is, how can we practically balance you know, work, school.

01:13:58--> 01:14:11

Oftentimes, sometimes if we have a project at work, or if we have something due at school, we're thinking about it so much, then we forget about Allah, Allah. And this is not to remember a lot. So can you give some practical tips on how to balance the two.

01:14:16--> 01:14:51

I only have one short tip. So I'll just say it and then I think however, we can give the rest of his tips on what I'm going to work on personally and take it take it for just that is I want to my goal for this from the bond is that when I see anything, I want to be able to remember a lot through that thing. So I know that maybe I won't be able to do it all the time. Like just when I wake up for you know, just when I wake up not you'll look at the ceiling and be like oh, Allah gave me a feeling. But my goal is to be able to remember a lot a lot more than I do normally. So when people ask me, How do I balance from a bond? How do I balance

01:14:52--> 01:15:00

you know, fasting in Ramadan in school and work. I think the best advice that I can give is that when you are in those other places

01:15:00--> 01:15:31

Maybe Maybe you don't feel like you're doing worship. So for example, you're at school, you're in a philosophy class or math class or English class, you might not feel like you're worshiping a lot at the moment, there's two things you can do, you can just make your ticket, you can just say, upon a lot, a lot more for gala, Satan or Mohammed, or at thunder, la, la, la, la casa de la, or, you know, there's a lot of couples who are a bit awkward, pifan II, there's a lot of little drop, Vicar you can make. That's one point. The other point is just to think about a lot. Just have them on your mind. Just think about him. Just think about all the things that you're learning and how that

01:15:31--> 01:16:05

relates to Allah, that's gonna be my goal. inshallah, personally, is to really just constantly think about last month, I had him on my heart and mind as much as I can. You know, Dr. Shara Osman, who lives in order from Allah, Allah have mercy on him who was one of hospital times teachers. He once said that the reason why I lost my father called the verses in the book as as well as the existing nature around us, as are the signs around us is that when we see the signs around us, we're supposed to remember the verses in the book. But when we read the verse in the book, we're also supposed to remember the signs around us. So it's a never ending cycle. And when we're walking around the Earth,

01:16:05--> 01:16:09

we're supposed to remember the reminder in the verses in the book, and also vice versa as well.

01:16:13--> 01:16:15

My closing remark is,

01:16:16--> 01:16:32

how to stay focused. My apologies, Abdullah, how to stay focused the great book by Mr. James Wright, I believe it's called goals, have a daily goal, my goal, my goal personally, is I would like to say a lot monthly, yada, yada.

01:16:33--> 01:17:11

Come out for laser Allah Ibrahim awada. de blah, email. Me The Majeed that's my personal goal is to say that 500 times a day during Ramadan, so whether I'm at school, whether I'm at right now, a con is playing in the backyard, and I'm sitting next to two, not so masculine men who are putting eye makeup on people in the middle of the mall. And I'm still gonna make this my goal, if I was here in Ramadan, then I would still make my goal to hit those goals and say, Make certain a certain number of times. And that's going to be a tremendous thing for all of you is make the goal wake up in the morning, look at the ceiling and say, Yes, a law, you put that ceiling there, that's why I'm

01:17:11--> 01:17:48

protected. And that ceiling is going to be the reason why I'm going to say somehow the law will be handy 300 times today, I'm going to read half of the way to focus while you're at work. To make it clear to the people around you, someone comes around and starts talking about the dirty things they did that weekend, feel free to tell them know what today I'm fasting. They publicize how much they drink and how much they had a great time last weekend, you publicize, I'm fasting. So I really appreciate you telling me that but during a time of fast we don't eat or drink and we control our tongues and what we talked about you don't have to make a pervert, you can we control our tongues

01:17:48--> 01:18:27

and what we talked about. So the first step is to make a goal no matter where you go. Throughout the day, I'm going to hit my goal, I'm going to say such and such deker this many times, I'm going to say the largest many times. And last but not least, try not to involve yourself in activities. Try not to go to the mall. Let me tell you the reason why I brought my wife today is because I'm about a week away. And I'd rather not get into. I'd rather not come to the mall at all. But work in school is a place that you have to go. But we can't take each other's examples. But I can only say this man told me this a long time ago and I'll tell you myself, when I was fasting this new in the hospital

01:18:27--> 01:19:06

when I was fasting they knew in high school when I was fasting It was a public with something that was public for band together and say the Muslims are fasting and don't tell them you don't have intercourse a we keep away from lewd talk. We keep away from Shake what your mama gave you. We keep away from these things because it's not godly. Use the word God as much as you can. When you tell and turn to someone and say, God bless that makes them realize, wait a minute there, there's a God that could last me. So try your best and takes a lot of confidence. There's 800 people in here, maybe 50 of you feel confident about your religion, but the rest of you want to feel confident. So I

01:19:06--> 01:19:44

would say that you stay focused and bring sweets in on the first day of Ramadan, bring sweets in the first day of Ramadan. And then when someone offers it to you could say I'm sorry, I'm fasting bang, the rest of Ramadan is done. Sales at Kroger and food town just went through the roof. And we're all happy. So that's my advice and Sheldon, I just wanted to say does iClicker integran weekly and I cannot thank them enough for putting me together with a colleague a friend and someone who I look forward to speaking and communicating with very soon in sha Allah, mad love for you and your family. And I pray that we get the opportunity to work together again xocolatl and Quran Weekly, and May

01:19:44--> 01:19:52

Allah subhanaw taala make all of you blessed. At the end of the day no matter how many talks you listen to the only person who is going to make this Ramadan unforgettable as you

01:19:55--> 01:20:00

thank you so much both of you does icon located on to all of our listeners and viewers.

01:20:01--> 01:20:13

to our sponsors to everybody that speaking so far and and Jesse also Burgess is going to speak tomorrow. Make sure you don't miss out Yasser burgesses session tomorrow. I would say

01:20:14--> 01:20:27

everything that I've learned in my life about how to be humble, if not everything, a lot of it is from chef Yasser and he's just such an amazing person every time I sit with him every time I listen to one of his

01:20:29--> 01:20:38

something, some recordings or YouTube videos is just always a boost for me. Half of the song, Brother, do you have anything to say about chase after and then returning tomorrow?

01:20:42--> 01:20:48

I will, I will be in to listen tomorrow to Yeah, I'll be I'll be listening astrology cows overdose is one of the few

01:20:49--> 01:20:51

people that I've met in my life who

01:20:53--> 01:21:05

I can always ask a question without fearing and thinking about me or anything differently. He's someone who is very loving. He's a very fatherly figure Michelle also really enjoy having him as my mentor and teacher.

01:21:07--> 01:21:27

And he's totally awesome. Tune in tomorrow and Charles same place Ramadan prep.com slash live and bring in all your friends and family and try to like get the word out for us as well and share it in the reward in sha Allah. I'll just end with this and one request. Half is awesome. If you do have time, we want to end with one of your famous artists inshallah.

01:21:30--> 01:21:40

There's rengay and salsa Mamba behind me, so I'm gonna actually walk outside they want me to make blocks. My wife has given me the eyes of not in the middle of Macy's. Hang on, guys.

01:21:45--> 01:22:04

While he's doing that, I just want to let you guys know that inshallah the recordings, the audio replay will be available in about half an hour at the same page that you're on right now. And then also the YouTube video recordings that are video. A lot of video requests are coming in each holiday will be available by the first week of Ramadan, not too happy

01:22:06--> 01:22:07

about

01:22:09--> 01:22:23

whether you raise your hands or you don't recognize one thing that Allah is there, whether you make dua with us or say amin or not recognize that Allah is the one who created us, who gave us the decision to make the law or not a law human

01:22:24--> 01:22:26

being just

01:22:31--> 01:22:33

hanging out, clean.

01:22:37--> 01:22:38

You

01:22:41--> 01:23:20

Hannah, can you come to me? No one mean, a lot. We ask for your mercy and your blessing. We ask that we could at least acknowledge how great you are. All we ask and beg that we could be amongst the people who realize that you are the source of our ease in life and you are the source of our happiness. You're the one who makes us laugh and you're the ones who gives us happiness? Or are we asked to be amongst those amongst those who you have blessed with the ability to be thankful. Allah we pray and ask that those who put this together Allah you bless them. And those of us right now 800 or 8000 who feel an inkling in their heart to do what's right or Allah make us do what we know is

01:23:20--> 01:24:02

right. All those of us who has misconceptions or took something from this talk away that wasn't meant to be that people wouldn't put hours and time together to do Oh Allah. Make those misconceptions float away. It will make us real people, or that make us amongst those people who are true to their souls. And we don't lie. Don't lie to the people around us who don't lie to you Allah but most allow, we beg that we don't lie to ourselves. Make us real people who Allah make us people who accept the blessing of Ramadan, and bless our parents, or loved the moms and dads who went out of their comfort zone to listen to young speakers or love Give them gender. The mom the dad, the

01:24:02--> 01:24:37

Auntie who found something awkward on her child's iPod or love bless both of the books, the daughter and the mother or not let us be real people. Let us be real Muslims. And let us submit to the dean La Ilaha Illa under panic in economic inequality mean my request I have asked nothing from anyone and after a man has not asked for new I asked before you put down the phone say before you click off before you click x before you stop doing what it is that you're doing now. Repeat after me once La ilaha illAllah Muhammad Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

01:24:38--> 01:24:56

I mean dramatic a mirage I mean don't put down the phone or click off until you have asked a lot what you need. Collective do is wonderful but no one no one knows the benefit of individual better than a lot take 10 seconds ask whatever you want from Allah, for he listened to us right now. So the handle like

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