Channel: Navaid Aziz
Navaid Aziz covers the concept of romance, and how Islam encourages mutual kindness and love amongst spouses through a study of certain portions of the seerah of the Prophet (SAW).
Bismillah R Rahman r Rahim in Alhamdulillah hinomoto who wants to know who wants to stoke fear of
the human Shuri and fusina woman say tiama Nina, Maria de la who Fela model Allah.
Allah, Allah. Allah Allah Allah Allah hula hula Shadi color, wash, Mohammed Abdullah Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa seldom at the Sleeman kathira.
one of the toughest jobs in show business, in particular. And even more specific than that, as a comedian is that being a comedian, you often come up after other comedians. And at times, you'll be placed in front of comedians who are better than new and funnier than you. And they're just much more entertaining. And such as the art of speaking. I mean, our times, a lot of it is just about the entertainment factor. And relating this to what's our situation and event today. You know, we just heard a marvelous talk, a beautiful reminder by our beloved share from home initiative, Hafiz and Allahu Allah. And I was thinking to myself, you know, I don't know how much more I could say to keep
the crowd entertained, they've already had 40 minutes, they haven't moved. They're getting restless, they're getting tired. And I recorded another situation that as I was growing up, I was really into basketball, basketball was one of my favorite sports. And even up until this day, I tried to follow it whenever I can, more specifically during the finals. And you remember in the year 2000, before I went to Medina,
Vince Carter was the up and coming superstar of that era, you know, his ability to dunk and get high up in the air was his big talent. And if you go back to his most famous dunks, they all come from that slam dunk competition in the year 2000. Where he did that 360 dunk, he started off behind the backboard and came out in front. Now, everyone remembers Vince Carter. But does anyone remember who came after Vince Carter. Now, the person who came after Vince Carter could have done just as good of a job. And he could have done dunks, which are even better. But the hype was surrounding Vince Carter. And just for those of you who don't know, exactly, Jerry Stackhouse, he came after Vince
Carter. And you know, he tried to the best of his ability, but everyone remembers Vince Carter. So this is a small, I guess, comparison, you could say, with show business and even in the artist speaking, that it's usually the person who has the most hype that is remembered. And this is an attitude which I think a lot of people need to change. Now, with all due respect to all of our speakers, we should not be coming to lectures for the sake of entertainment, but rather there should be Islamic motives behind them from these motives is to increase our demand from these motives is to gather in the word in the houses of Allah subhanaw taala, and to increase in our worship. So these
should be some of the motives and entertainment should not be one of them. So those those are just a quick couple of words, I wanted to share with everyone here today. That having been said the topic, as was mentioned, was love stories from the Prophet sallallahu from the life of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam, or in other words, was the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam romantic. Now, as I was researching this topic, if you look at the word romance in the dictionary, you will come up with 12 different definitions from those 12 definitions that you will see, the vast majority of them deal with emotions of the heart, and emotions of the heart to such a degree that the mind
plays little or no role in them. And now, if you look back into Western civilization, or history, there was a period in time, which they called romanticism. Now, what could possibly the what could possibly be the relationship between this period in time and the term and word romance? If you look at the historical context of this time period, when did this period of romanticism take place? It was after the Enlightenment in western civilization, and the spirit of enlightenment, enlightenment led to the Industrial Revolution. And during this timeframe, everything was about science. Everything was about using your mind. Everything was about proving everything with your mind, and
empirical evidence. So people were getting fed up of this, especially the artists and the people who are specialized in literature. You can't be a good literalist, you can't be a good artist, if you're just using your mind, but rather, it requires passion. It requires emotions from the heart. So then, Araya arose this group of people who said that we're going to do things no longer from our hearts, no longer from our minds, but rather from our hearts. And as you see in history as a whole, every time there's a reaction and this is one of the laws of
Every time there's an action, it results in an equal or greater reaction. And this is what happened. And this this period in time came to be known as the period of the romanticists. Because they refuse to use their intellects and just persistent on using their hearts. So now, when we say was the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam a romantic to say that he was one who didn't use his intellect is insulting and degrading to the Prophet sallallahu wasallam. So this would be an incorrect terminology, but to say was the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam loving towards his wives? Did he show affection and mercy? And did he show kindness to them? Then indeed, as Allah subhanho wa Taala
says himself, that in the Messenger of Allah, you have a great example. Now, who is this great example for? Is it for the Muslims only? Is it for the people who come to the masjid? Is it for the people who seclude themselves or is it for all of mankind? Allah subhanaw taala described him as a mercy for all of mankind. But in this particular ayah, where Allah subhanho wa Taala says that he is a great example. Allah subhanaw taala goes on to say, for he who hopes in meeting Allah subhanho wa Taala. And he who hopes in the last day, and remembers Allah subhanho wa Taala much. This is how Allah subhanho wa Taala ends of the ayah was the Corolla kathira. Now, as we mentioned, as our
Brother Mohammed Sheikh mentioned, the story of Abu Dhabi, Allahu taala, knew that he was a companion of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam who was persistent and consistent in his worship of Allah subhanho wa Taala, sometimes to such a degree, that he would leave off the rights of his family. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was an example not only for him, but for all of us here as well, that there is a time for worship, there's a time for your Salah, there's a time for fasting. And at the same time, there's a time where you spend with your family, where you take them out, you take them out to enjoy nature, you take them out on experienced filling trips, and you just
spent quality time with them. And this is what we see from the Sunnah of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So this having been said, our discussion revolves around the love stories are the stories of kindness are the stories of affection that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam partook in towards his wife's. So in hearing the stories, not only should we be marveled at how the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is a great example for us in worship, and in character. But at the same time, is a great example of a person who takes care and looks after his families, and is very loving as well. So if you want to learn how to be affectionate towards your
wives, and your families, and you want to learn how to love, then you need to look no further than the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam. So for those of you who may be married, this will serve as a reminder and a way, or a means to increase the love amongst you and your spouse. And for those of us all, and for those of you who are not married, then this will serve as a way to prepare yourself as to what you should expect. So now some stories from the time of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam.
Or, actually the stories from the tongue of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam, where he showed affection towards his wives, or many. And I think before we actually get into this, we need to actually define what the word love is, if you look in philosophy, you'll see that two questions often arose amongst the philosophers. What is the purpose of life? And how do you define love? These were two things that were commonly asked. Now, again, you know, a lot of people may think I'm bringing a lot of secular science into this, but secular sciences can help us understand Islam, and likewise, Islam perfects our secular sciences, as well. So when you study conflict resolution, or
when you study advanced mathematics, they have something called Occam's razor, meaning a philosophy or a theory that says that the best answer is the simplest. So then here we have the philosophers trying to define love. We'll give you paragraphs and essays and doctoral thesis on what love actually is. But you need to look no further at the greatest of lovers, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, in two simple words love is to be thoughtful and considerate. And you will see that even though there are different levels of love, and different types of love, they all have around the they all revolve around these two key characteristics, being thoughtful and considerate.
So you look at a child and the mother. The mother cares for the child and tries to protect and provide for this child to the best of her
ability. Then you look at the husband towards his wife, as our brother Muhammad mentioned that the wife and being considered and showing his love, he often offers to wash the dishes and take out the garbage and take care of her other needs and necessities. These are ways that we show our love. And this love is something that is mutually reciprocated. So that having been said, let us take examples from the life of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam, where he showed and expressed his love.
Now one of the most clear signs from the from the life of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is, as we all know, when we love something, we always refer to it, and we always talk about it. We love Islam, thus we implement it, and we are not ashamed to show it and we're not ashamed to talk about it. This is everything else. When you're really proud of something when you really love something, you'll always be talking about it. So take one example from the seal of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, where the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam selected Amara Nagas the illustrious and noble companions of the Allahu anhu to be the leader of one of the expeditions. Now
to be a commander chosen by the prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is indeed to be amongst the elite. So I'm going to be the last of the lowdown on who he thought that he has reached this great level in the eyes of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam. So while the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is sitting, during the time of the expedition, he comes up to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and says the art of sola, inform me, who is the one who is most beloved to you? Or who do you love the most? To which the Prophet sallallahu wasallam says, You know, I shouted Allahu talana She is the most beloved to me. So I'm gonna ask he gets a bit distorted you know, he's
thinking, Okay, let's go no Christian, maybe it was a solemn will say my name now. So he says, You're a Sula. This is not the type of love I was referring to, but rather tell me who is the most beloved of the men. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says, her father, meaning avacado de la hotel and who, now it would have been very easy and simple for the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam to say that it is Abu Bakar but rather to show the magnitude and the great love that he had for I shall have the Allahu Tanana he said her father, meaning the father of I shall the Allahu Tanana. So this was one of the ways that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam showed his love for
eyeshadow, the Allahu Tanana. And as we know, she was the most beloved of wives to the Prophet, sallAllahu, alayhi wasallam, that she was always a topic of discussion, and every, everything that he thought of revolved around her to such a degree that if he was asked whom he loved the most amongst the men, rather than saying abubaker his name, he said, the father of my beloved. So this is one small example. Another example. And this is where we get into the discussion of being considerate and thoughtful that one of the ways that this is truly established, is to reflect upon how often do you actually think of your wives? How often do you actually think about your spouse?
And this applies both to the brothers and the sisters, the brothers when they are at work? How difficult is it to send an email saying, honey, I love you. And for the sisters, when they're at home, when they're baking, how difficult is it to bake a cake or to bake a muffin that says I love you on top, it's not very difficult at all. But our loves being so busy and being diverted from the plots of shaitan. And from the whispers of our enough's, we don't take the time and we don't have that will to put forth that extra step of showing affection towards our spouses. So, let us take take a look at some other examples from the love of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, towards
Another example of which the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam showed his love openly and you know, love is not something that we need to be embarrassed of. It is something we should openly least speak about. You know, in a lot of cultures in a lot of societies. The concept of love is taboo. Meaning it's something that you only discuss in your houses or in very discreet places, but in Islam, that form of love which Allah subhanaw taala has made permissible, it is open and easy for us to talk about. And this is one of the wisdoms behind the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam marrying many wives, you know a lot of people may come and they will ask, why is it that he Prophet
sallallahu alayhi wa sallam when he died, was married to nine wives, you know, was it that it wasn't that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was filled with desire or what was the reasoning behind this, if you studied the seal of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam easily you can come up with 10 different solutions, but at the top of the solutions or the at the top of
The reasonings is that in order to preserve how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was with his wives, you needed a lot of witnesses to it. If you had one wife, how much could she possibly narrate about this man, she could speak but she will eventually forget. So this Allah subhana wa tada in his divine wisdom, and in its in his infinite wisdom, granted the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam permission to marry this woman, so that we 1400 years later will know how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam cared for his wives and loved his wives and took care of them. So getting back to the issue at hand, hiding love, this is not something we have to do. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi
wa sallam openly showed his affection for his wives. Now, how did you do this, not by hugging them and kissing them in public, nor mentioning lewd things about them. But rather, when he mentioned the praises of people, he would praise his wives. And when he mentioned good characteristics, he would mention the good characteristics of his wives. And when he was asked, Who was the most beloved to him, he did not shy away and say, you know, the most beloved to me is my mother, or my father would drive there he was bald and proud, and he said that it is my wife. So this is something to keep in mind. Now, this having being said, the companions are the Allahu taala at home. They always wanted
to be on the good side of the Prophet sallallahu wasallam and always get the favor of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So one of the ways they would do this is that they would constantly give gifts to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, from them was made from them with milk and dates and other forms of gifts. Now everyone knew that the most beloved wife to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was I shadowed the Allahu Tanana. So what did they do? They thought that, you know, the most beloved wife is Isola della huzzah Nana, so when we gave him gifts, while he's with her, this will increase his joy, and it will increase his happiness. So this is what the
companions or the Allahu tanenbaum did, that the night that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam had with I shall have the lowdown on how this is when they would give their gifts hoping that the prophets of Allah when he was sent them would prefer this companion over the other due to the amount of the gift or due to the expense of the gift or anything other than that, and for some people, it was just due to the fact that when you relate something with something good a to isn't of itself becomes something good. So the I the night with Isola de la hotel, and I was suddenly beloved to the Prophet sallallahu it was send them so they thought that if we give it to him on this night, he'll
love it even more, and he will show his appreciation even more. So the companions are the Allahu Allah when they did this, the other wives complained of injustice, saying that the Arizona law that why is it that during I shall the Allahu taala and has night, you get so many gifts, but during our nights we get nothing. So they sent Fatima, the daughter of the prophets of Allah when you send them and Fatima first of all the complaint of the wives towards the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam said that indeed She is my beloved, do not say anything over meaning that I shall allow Tanana has a very special place in my heart. So don't you dare criticize her or say anything that is not
befitting of her. So thus far, Tamara de la hatanaka heard this and conveyed it to the other wives, then, almost selama of the Allahu taala came with her complaint. And as this scenario goes, almost selama complained to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was with Ayesha that very day.
So now I shall have the Allahu taala hears this complaint. And this is natural for any woman and any human being. That when you hear a complaint being said about you, you will have this word to respond. But I shall have the Allahu Tanana being the wise and being the mature for her age, she withheld herself and let the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam deal with the situation. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam stayed silent and gave I shall have the Allahu Tanana look to from which she understood that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam wanted her to defend herself. So I showed her the Allahu taala and he defended herself. And after she was done, she described the
scenario. She said, I spoke back to almost cinema in such a way that we saw the dryness from her mouth, meaning that she was in a state of awe. She was in a state of shock, and her jaw just dropped and dried up. So I showed a doula who Tanana was able to defend herself. So this is another example from the love of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam that he openly showed it and did not hide it. Now from the examples of the tie between, again describing the love of the Prophet sallallahu it was selling for eyeshadow, the Allahu Tanana is the example of Masak Masak was a famous
Imam of Hadith and when he would narrate Hadith, he would say, from Oman, meaning from the mother of the believers, I shall do that I shall the daughter of acidic visa, deca and masina. The one who preserved her chestatee Athol Hara, the pure. This is how we would speak about Isola della hota Langa. Now the description just didn't end over here. But rather he went on to say, Habiba, Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam that amongst all of the good characteristics, the final praise he would mention is that she was the Beloved of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. So again, the love of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam for I shall the Allahu Tanana was
something which was very, very well known. Now one last example about I shall have the Allahu taala and that is the example of almost selama or the Allahu taala and her she was another wife of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and another one who taught the successors and the companions about how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was in his house. So we have a hadith from Mashallah the Allahu taala that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam would kiss her in Ramadan. So when the companions and successors came to almost send them out of the Allahu tanana, they said, and they asked, Did the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam kiss you and Ramadan? And to which she
said no, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam kissed and preferred I shall the Allahu taala on her alone mean that she was the only one that was kissed from the wives of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam were indeed he could not resist himself from her. So even the other wives, as jealous as they were, as generous as they were, recognize the love of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and the favor that he gave a shout out the Allahu Tanana. And with these last couple of minutes, let us reflect upon how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam actually dealt with eyeshadow, the Allahu Tanana. Now these examples, they may not be directly applicable to our lives
today, but make analogy upon them. And you will find many ways to show kindness and love towards your wives and busy lives either. We'll try to take a few examples before we end off. So now take the example of how did to your mom become legislated for us to move as we know, as a form or a way of purification that we do when we do not have water? How did it come about? And it will love itself is another love story. One day I showed Allahu Tanana was with the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and he himself sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was present, and they were returning back from one of the expeditions. And during this journey, I shadowed the Allahu Tanana
lost one of the necklaces that she had. And as we all know, jewelry something beloved to every woman, Allah subhanho wa Taala naturally created this love for ornaments and beauty and a woman and thus we love them even more when they have these ornaments and forms of beautification on them. So I shall have the Allahu talana when she launched this necklace, she said to you the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, Yasuda, Allah, I have lost this necklace, and I have misplaced it. Now, this is the first point that we can stop at. And Dr. Allison from most men. And you know, this includes all of us are very harsh and very rigid towards their women and towards people in general. When they put
their minds to it, they're set that they have to live up to the schedule that they have set. So when we go on journeys, you know, the wife's like, I want to use the bathroom, you're like, you can wait a bit longer, and you're at home, you're hungry, your wife has to eat as well. But you're like, Honey, I'm hungry. Feed me now you can eat later. We don't have patience towards them. We don't have this gentleness. Now take the example of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, he's with his companions coming back from an expedition. Everyone is hungry, everyone is thirsty. Everyone is in a state where they don't feel natural. You know, you're away from home. It's not like our journeys
today where they're quick, and we have all these luxuries, but rather you ride riding through the desert. Now in this very scenario, they were in a place where there was no washer, so they were in a time of difficulty. So I showed the law hotel and I knew that Abu Bakar her father would come and represent her and she would get very angry. So nighttime came and I showed her the Louboutin and her was visited by a father and a worker represented her and got very, very upset, saying how could you prevent the companions of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam from traveling back to their homes after this great expedition for the sake of a necklace. A Jewish eyeshadow. Allahu taala just true.
Ain't quite and heard what her father had to say. So now, as you mentioned, there was no washer over here. They didn't know what to do when the time for Silla came. And then Allah subhanho wa Taala revealed the ayat of tmo. So behind the reasoning of revolution behind this noble and beautiful Aya was another love story, that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was generous and kind towards Ayesha that he knew that she loved this necklace. So he stopped his heart care of and his whole expedition to search for this necklace of eyeshadow de la hatanaka. Salaam time came, there is no water. And thus Allah subhanho wa Taala reveals the ayat pertaining to tm. So this is just one
example. Now, as we mentioned, the such examples may not be applicable to all of our lives. But the lesson that is to be derived is the concept and wisdom behind kindness, love, mercy, and being considerate. So now How hard is it for us as men to open the doors for our wives? How hard is it for us men, that before we go home, after a long day of work, that we fragrance ourselves with something nice, and we use the miswak. And Firstly, our breaths, and we come over here, and we look nice? How hard is it to do these things when they only take a couple of seconds. And likewise, for our sisters, if you want to increase the love in your marriage, then know that it is a two way road. The
what you give is surely what you will get. So put love into your marriage and find unique ways and dynamic ways of expressing your love. Now, I times you may be surprised with putting on perfume and putting on makeup and dressing nicely. But at times, you need to find other ways to please your husband. As we know we live in modern times, times are changing the ways that the women used to please their husbands in the past may not be enough anymore in some marriages. So you always have to be creative. Always be researching on ways to keep that love and to keep that spark in your marriage. Be considerate of the feelings of your spouse and be in Allah hits Allah, Allah subhanho
wa Taala will place that consideration and will place that love in the mind and heart of your spouse as well. That having been said, We ask Allah subhanaw taala to increases in our love for our spouses and increases in our love for Allah subhanho wa Taala and His messenger who not only was an example for us in a better and more my life, but also an example for us in how to treat our women and as the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that the best of you are those who are best to their wives aku colada stock Roma honey welcome Melissa muslimeen Subhana Allah Hama will be Hambrick a Chateau La Ilaha Illa and istockphoto tubo la
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