Moutasem al-Hameedy – The Monumental Tafsir #43 – Surah At Tahrim
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Smilla Rahmanir Rahim Al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa salatu salam ala Ashrafi. Most rains he didn't have Medina earlier he was heavy rain all that long aluminum iron from now on find out when I lived in was ignited a human element of that.
So we continue now we begin a new sewer actually solar,
the solar, of divorce and Shala. Today we're going to see something very interesting. Because generally speaking, we tend to
separate
specific technical rulings from the
Format either, we tend to see them as two separate areas, but Subhanallah so lots of Fallout actually shows that the akhom the rulings
what sounds to us as technical specific rulings are actually so steeped in a nestled in an environment of faith, trust in Allah knowledge of Allah's names and attributes. And also we're going to see a very interesting aspect of Islam which really marks
one of the biggest differences between
the Islamic system of society and court justice and governance in comparison to
what we have today prevalent in the world today pretty much everywhere.
So we start with sort of the dollar by the
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surah Allah Bismillah al Rahman al Rahim here Allah subhanaw taala says
Addressing his Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam and the believers, all Prophet unbelievers when any of you want to divorce woman then do it in a prescribed manner. And do not hasten to issue a divorce as soon as a reason for doing so occurs without paying attention to the guidelines set out by Allah, rather divorced them at a time when their prescribed waiting period can properly start, that is, at the time at the right time for the right data or prescribed waiting time to begin. What this means is that the husband should divorce his wife when she is in a state of purity, that is not menstruating, during a period of purity in which she went in which he has not had * with
her. This is the kind of divorce following which the waiting period will be clear. That is in contrast to a case in which the husband divorces her when she is menstruating. Because the menstrual cycle in which he divorced her will not count and the waiting period will be longer as a result of that. Similarly, if he divorces her during a period of purity, in which he has not he has had * with her, he cannot be sure that she is not pregnant, because the pregnancy will not show at that time. And as a result, that type of waiting period to be observed will not be clear. Allah subhanaw taala has instructed us to keep an accurate, accurate count of the waiting period,
either by counting menstrual cycles, if the woman man streets or by counting months, if she does not Main Street and is not pregnant. Keeping an accurate count of it is a fulfillment fulfillment of the Command of Allah and it also fulfills the rights of the husband, who has issued their divorce and the rights of any future husband, as well as the woman's right to maintenance and so on. If she counts right that she will have a clearer idea of her situation and her rights and duties will be known. This command to keep an accurate count of the waiting period is addressed to both the husband and the wife. If she is accountable, otherwise it is addressed to her guardian and fear Allah your
Lord that is FEAR Him in all your affairs and with regard to the rights of divorced wives do not turn them divorced women out of their houses during the waiting period. rather let them stay in the houses where they were living at the time when their husbands divorced them nor should they themselves leave that is it is not permissible for them to leave their houses with regard to the prohibition on turning them out. That is because it is obligatory for the husband to provide the wife with accommodation so that she may complete her waiting period which is one of his which is one of his rights as for the prohibition on them themselves leaving that is because they're leaving
could lead to loss of the husband's rights this prohibition on being turned out of or leaving their houses last until completion of the waiting period.
Okay, so bear with the technicality. I know this is divorce many people don't even know the rulings that pertain to marriage let alone divorce but bear with jolla bear with me a little we're going to draw some practical lessons and some important conclusions from this. So just be patient and show what had
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unless they are guilty of manifestly immoral conduct, that is any actions that are obviously reprehensible, which dictate that they should be turned out because their actions are so reprehensible that they may cause harm to the household if the woman is not turned out, such as offensive talk and immoral deeds. In such cases, it is permissible for the husband to ask the wife to leave because she has brought it on herself. providing her with accommodation during the waiting period is a kind of consolation and kindness to her. And if she loses that because of her immoral conduct, then she is the one who has brought it brought harm on herself. This is applicable in the
case of a revocable first or second divorce. However, in the case of an irrevocable divorce, she is not entitled to accommodation, because accommodation is connected to maintenance and maintenance is only a right in the case of a revocable divorce, not an error in not an irrevocable divorce. Such are the limits ordained by Allah that is the limits that he has set out and prescribed for his slaves, and has commanded them to adhere to them and abide by them. whoever transgresses the limits ordained by Allah by not adhering to them, and by transgressing them or falling short of them has wronged himself. That is He has caused himself to miss out on an opportunity to follow the commands
of Allah, on which well being in this world and the Hereafter is based.
You do not know Perhaps Allah will bring about some new development leading to the reconciliation. That is Allah has prescribed the waiting period and has made divorce connected to it for significant reasons, including the following. Perhaps Allah will instill love and compassion in the heart of the husband who issued the divorce, so that he will take her back and resume intimate intimacy with her. So that waiting period gives him the opportunity to do so. Or perhaps he divorced her because of some reason on her part, then that reason will cease to exist during the waiting period, so that he can take her back because the reason for divorcing her is no longer applicable. During the waiting
period, it will be established whether or not the wife is pregnant from the husband, one day have approached the end of their waiting periods. That is when the end of the waiting period approaches. Once the waiting period is over. The husband no longer has the choice between keeping his wife or separating from her. Either retain them on equitable terms that is on a basis of kind treatment and good companionship, not by way of causing harm harsh treatment, and not letting her get on with her life. Keeping her with such ill intentions is not permissible or part with them on equitable, equitable terms. That is a separation in which there is nothing contrary to Islamic teachings. And
without trading insults, arguing or mistreating the wife in order to force her to give up some of her wealth, call to witness the divorce or the taking back of the wife to just men from among you, that is to Muslim men of good character because this calling to witness closes the door to dispute and prevents either of them concealing that which he should disclose, and or witnesses give honest testimony for the sake of Allah that is give proper testimony as it should be given without adding or subtracting anything. And by giving it seek the pleasure of Allah alone. Do not pay attention when giving testimony to any relative because of your ties with him or to any friend because of your
love for him. This that we have met
In addition to you of rulings and limits, is an exhortation for those who believe in Allah and the Last Day, for whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day that would lead him to pay heed to the expectations of Allah and give precedence to the hereafter by doing righteous deeds as much as he can, that is in contrast to the one whose heart is devote devoid of faith, for he would not for he would not care about and whatever he commits of evil deeds, or about paying heed to the expectations of Allah because there is nothing to motivate him to do so.
Because divorce may lead to anxiety, distress and grief, Allah subhanaw taala enjoins people to fear him, and tells us that Whoever fears him with regard to divorce and other matters, Allah will grant him relief and a way out from difficulty.
So either a lot of them have to
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a jar along with equally in federal law, a Washington when they put out and lay it out. So
if a person wants to divorce his wife, and does it in the proper manner by issuing a single divorce when she is not menstruating, and does not during a period of purity in which he has had had * with her, Allah will not put him through difficulty. Rather Allah will grant him away out from difficulty and gives him room to resume the marriage if he regrets having issued the divorce. Although the context of this verse has to do with divorce and taking back the life, it is more general in meaning Whoever fears Allah subhanaw taala and constantly seeks his pleasure and all his affairs, Allah will reward him in this world and the hereafter. Part of that reward is that
Allah will grant him relief and a way out from all difficulties and hardship.
Just as Whoever fears Allah, He will grant him relief and a way out. By the same token, whoever does not fear Allah will face difficulties, obstacles and troubles that he cannot find a way out of, or escape the consequences there of this is also applicable to divorce if a person does not fear Allah with regard to it, and issues a divorce in a prohibited manner, such as issuing the threefold divorce and the like, he will inevitably come to regret it and will not be able to escape the negative consequences thereof, and will provide for him from where he does not expect, Allah will bestow provision upon the one who fears him from where he does not expect it. Whoever puts his trust
in Allah with regard to his spiritual and worldly affairs, by relying on a lot to bring him that which will benefit him and ward off that will that which will harm him, and trusting him to make that easy for him, he will suffice him that is with regard to the matter concerning which he put his trust in Him. When the matter is in the care of the self sufficient, the most strong, the Almighty, the Most Merciful, He is closer to the individual than anything else, but divine wisdom may dictate that it may be delayed until the appropriate time. Hence Allah subhanaw taala says, Allah will surely attain his purpose, that is, his will and decree will inevitably be done. But Allah has set a
measure and appointed term for all things. That is He has set a time and measure and matters will not go beyond that or fall short of it. Okay, let's start putting things in con
Next, in order to understand this context of divorce, we need to establish the
the bigger context of marriage in Islam.
So marriage in Islam is something that is highly encouraged. It's part of the perfection of a human being.
It's why the prophets of salaam said
or referred to marriage as someone who gets married
that they have this person has completed half of their Deen, Phil yet tabula have in this filler. So let the person for the other half let them do good works. So marriage really helps you become a better person, a more complete person. So, generally speaking, Islam is it better being single or being married, you're better off being married, male and female, it is something that is encouraged. There's something that is valued in Islam, and that is a source of great reward.
There is some kind of discussion among Muslim scholars is it an obligation to marry or not. And the strongest opinion that seems to be the majority that if a person cannot stay decent, and live a decent life, without marriage, marriage becomes an obligation upon them.
And really, marriage safeguards the person, then the man and the woman, the husband, and the wife.
But the dispute happens when a person is able to lead
a decent life. Without marriage, they say it's, it's at the highest level of recommendation. So at the highest level of recommendation, that means it's just below our level of obligation. And that shows why there is some kind of discussion around the matter why, because
with, with marriage, there is a lot of doors for good open up for the individual.
And for the Muslim woman in general. So for the individual, it's human nature, that men need women and women need men. This kind of closeness, this kind of company, this kind of intimacy is something that is natural to the human being. So a person is incomplete. Without this.
It's very important for the physical well being psychological well being and the spiritual well being.
It's human nature.
And it's human nature as well to do with it. This in the according to the structure of family, the structure of marriage, the institution of marriage, and family. So it's respond, there is a responsibility, there are rights, there are obligations. It's, it's a comprehensive system. And it's a balanced system. And it accounts for all the details and possible scenarios that any marriage can be in.
So you don't have to reinvent some kind of new dynamic of relationship because any kind of dynamic for the relationship between man and woman that humans come up with,
it will just cause more problems than benefits.
Allah Yeah, at the moment, one of our lovely from heavier, Allah created us and Allah knows the ins and outs that are infinite in our lives, and in our interactions that no system can account to really treat every possible situation and scenario, but a divine system that accounts for all the details. Sometimes we can come up with a system that seems to be working short term, but the long term consequences can be devastating.
And humans get happy, too early in any kind of invention, or any kind of idea that they bring about. But they don't see the long consequences. And not only the long consequences, they could be beneficial at the personal level. But at the social level, there could actually be a power for destruction. And we see this in today's world, the family, the institution of the family is broken,
is broken.
And children are growing up with single parents. And that causes a whole slew of psychological issues
and problems. That's why people go you know, get off track and their life, a lot of people it just because of that kind of it's not a natural life. It's not a natural life. Now, yes, divorce is bound to happen, but not in the rates that we see today. And not with the toxicity. And the the the graduates that we see that that that single parents and families seem to be living in. So it's so marriage in Islam is highly celebrated, highly encouraged and Allah subhanaw taala promises so much reward for it. So
opens the doors for a great reward. For example, having children, whatever good your children do,
the reward automatically automatically goes to you a copy of the reward,
a copy full copy of the reward, they get their reward in full, but a copy of that also goes to you. So it doubles, and you'll get a share of
the profits, lots of them says
about the,
it's a matter of no Adam and lemon 30th. When sort of Adam dies, their deeds will come to a halt, there will cease to be there is no more actions, except through three channels, and one of them will lead on salehoo, near the
righteous child of theirs, that makes to ask for them. And scholars say you had the ruler who, because the word of Dora again, we don't understand it very well, these days, we limited to part of its meaning, but it means a bad worship that. So this is why many of the scholars who commented on this hadith, they said, Any act of worship that the child of a person does the father or the other mother, they get the reward for that as well.
Without teat without deducting from the reward of their children. And that's not only limited to your immediate children that runs down all the way till the end of time
with all of your progeny.
So there's consensus among the Muslim scholars that whatever good your children do, if you are a righteous person, like you taught them, you educated them You did well, we don't want to, because some people now is just going to start you know, beating themselves up. No, just if you're a reasonable human being a reasonable parent, and you try your best you do your best. The good that consensus among the Muslim scholars that the good you do goes directly to your parents, as well. A copy of the reward goes to the your parents.
So what could be better than that? Imagine the amount of reward that you get.
So that's a great doorphone good. That's live like one lifetime multiplied so many times.
And this is one reason why the Prophet SAW Allah Islam says to cathodal for in Nemo, bear him be como la mama human, increase in number reproduce,
reproduce, I'm going to take pride in you on the Day of Judgment.
Not pride, like we are a cult, and we are against another code, no pride in the fact that you're Muslim, you, you raise your children as Muslim. These are souls saved by the prophets Allah said and by the mission of the prophets, Allah send them from the hellfire. That's the pride its pride in front of Allah. It's like I feel honored because of that, fulfilling the mission.
So that's one thing with regards to marriage.
Okay, the rewards also taking care of each other. people overlook this thing, you know, when a husband looks after his wife, when he cares for her, when she cares for him,
when he's kind to *, and she's nice to him, when he fulfills his obligations towards her, financially, everything, and she also does the same. That's a great source of reward that has not hollow. That's a great source of reward. And you don't want to miss out on this. This is why the prophets have said and said how Eurocom Hyrule commonly Ali, the best among you are the best to their family, the best to their spouse. And he says one hydrocone idea and I am the best among you to his own family.
The Prophet SAW Selim says the best among you not the best only in this dunya in the sight of Allah subhanaw taala. The best among you are the ones who have good conduct toward their family, they take good care of their family, their spouse, and their children. He specifically primarily is your spouse, your wife.
So that's a great source of reward.
A great source of reward, greater reward than most likely, most of the all of the optional acts of worship, the extra soda that you do, the extra prayers that you do.
Being good to your family takes priority over all of this and thus gains you more reward than anything else. And it's overlooked and we don't appreciate it. And again, that's because a lot of the toxins that have made their way into our system. We don't seem to appreciate these great things. These are you want to live a great life. Be someone who's dutiful to your family.
Well, like you don't have to save like a hijacked airplane. You don't have to save someone who's drowning and in a flood.
People think oh, that's heroism, no heroism is if you are able to treat your family well and take good care of them. That's the highest level of being a
You truly, but you know what
you're not meant today. To do this,
you should stand on your own, you should be an individual. individualism, yes, individualism because you're vulnerable. And then there is a creation of, of a huge ego and false sense of pride when no one can live with another
literally like individuals the way that they are now conditioned by so many different institutions and, and sources of influence is that, you know, no one can live with you and you can't live with anyone.
It's a nightmare.
So people are living alone.
There's no marriage, and marriages fail. And then the the the wreckage behind this is, is children whose future is all, you know, a jeopardy because of that.
That's why Islam holds these values so high. They're so high marriage is so high is so important. You can't have healthy individuals, you can't have healthy society. You can't have that without having healthy marriage. Without marriage being a priority in society, something that is celebrated something that is appreciated, something that is valued, and something that's sacred, and Allah calls me Thunderclan Valley you are this is an agreement. This is a very emphatic it's, it's a huge agreement.
It's a huge agreement, and you should stick to it.
And how does Islam preserve marriage and other rulings as well?
It preserves them through the legal system in Islam. And this is something we need to understand. Because when we look at for example, generally speaking for the modern reader, when they read surah like the sort of Bala they might find some, something's inappropriate.
Why discuss these details? Why do we speak in this manner about women and things like that, you have to realize that you that we are mostly functioning according to a system, then we take something from Islam, or we pick it from its natural context, then we bring it into a completely different dynamic, where it doesn't belong, and then we try to make a judgment around it. You can't do that.
You literally can't do that. It doesn't make any sense because the the the aspects of Islam and Islamic legal
semuc legal system, they function within themselves as they complement each other. So you can't take something out of context and understand you won't be able to understand it, you will misconstrue it, you will have the wrong judgment, the wrong conclusion about it. And obviously that will that will affect the way you relate to Islam.
So
the way Islam are we that's a big difference between the legal system today and the legal system in Islam. And you know, we don't seem to have a legal system, the legal system in Islam as a reality.
Fiona mashallah, she's active along with
Kiva, Kiva. She's okay, she can manage
us through what's going on
she a phone picker.
Okay, so
yeah, so in the the legals in Islam, the legal system is a tool for morality.
It's based on morality, the legal system in Islam is based on morality, and saw that a polyp is a very beautiful opportunity to get into this point. Because look at all of these technical details that Allah talks about. And in the Quran, generally, Allah doesn't talk about technical details. The Quran gives guidelines in general. But when it comes to the family, and that shows the importance of the family, matters of the family, you will find that Allah talks specifically about details. So there is no room for interpretation.
No room for interpretation, rights, and rulings are crystal clear. No one can mess with them.
There's no There's no leeway for you to just change rulings that are stated clearly, with a clear definitive text by Allah subhanaw taala you can't do anything, you can't change them. This applies to marriage divorces, and Marriage Divorce and you will find it also in in the laws of inheritance. These are very sensitive matters and any issues with them will jeopardize the family. And and Allah doesn't want to give this a chance
and do something else that shows I'm going to return back to the legal system and what it is predicated on
Allah Subhana Allah the Prophet SAW Selim tells us about shirvan that share binds sets his throne on water, right.
Then he sends
his troops around for you will see rejoinder
to corrupt people.
Then they come back to him someone says I made this one this person still I made that person commit Zina, I made this person eat libre i made this person kill that person.
ShaVonne still listening. Then comes a person and he says for October, you know, there was a was LG, I split a husband from his wife, for your old Oh Shaybah. And
she says to him, You are the man.
Come sit near me. And he sits him right next to him on his own floor.
way, shape and knows how to crop to humans.
He's the master of corruption.
You want to learn how to corrupt human beings take a course with shaper.
Yeah, he knows. So why does he celebrate the separation between husband and wife. There is a Hadith that is attributed to the Prophet SAW Selim but it's not authentic. And there is a little bit of issue with the meaning as well the scholars had a criticism
with the meaning that observable, halali illallah and Tala that the
the halal that Allah hates the most is divorce. It's inappropriate. Allah doesn't what Allah makes something Khaled. Khaled doesn't detest it.
Allah if Allah dislikes something, okay, if Allah hates something, and it's evil,
it's evil. And Allah would set the rulings against it.
But obviously, divorce is discouraged in Islam. So
as you can see, divorce is the sort, meaning when it's impossible, it's impossible to have a healthy family and
live together.
And the benefits of separation outweigh the benefits of staying together, or staying together creates more harm than separation, then Allah loves this option. That's why Allah allows to Allah.
And you cannot see Paula without, again, the Islamic legal system, the Islamic legal system, as we said is based on morality,
is based on morality. So the ultimate guideline, the deeper dynamics of Islamic legislation is morality, good and evil, they maximize the maximization of good minimization of evil period,
short term long term older force.
Whereas the legal system here
is not based on morality. So if you want to understand the legal system, this is why, you know, we don't have legal training, and we're not sorry, we don't have more training here. In Islam, children are taught morality, and the principles of morality, morality, and the application of morality from a young age.
Parents, most of their
the rearing of the child is based on what teaching the child moral principles that are in line with federal law, the teachings of Islam, establishing justice, with a child establish establishing nobility, establishing
generosity, establishing decency,
and all of that stuff. This is what child in raising children this is what it means in Islam. So this is an integral part of Islam.
And this is the driving force behind human behavior, not the legal system. And that's the mistake many people do. Today when people trying to get married, you will find the husband, he sits the wife down, she sits him down. They make a list of their rights and their obligations. And it's a mathematical process. Right? It's just like you're sitting with a lawyer, literally, and she's like gonna hold you accountable, you're gonna hold her accountable. I'm gonna catch you at every mistake.
And with every issue, we go to the Guardian, we speak to the Imam
and so on and so forth. This is a transaction This is not marriage, and no marriage survives by that. There is always the scholars with everything in Islam with business with the marriage with all dealings in Islam, there is a HELOC. And there is
a HELOC take precedence.
And they come from the same source so they are compatible. But when do you resort to an account when there is disagreement, and we can't solve the problem and no one is willing to make a concession or a compromise.
Okay, we have to take it right. How can I say we everyone has to get the right exactly without any Generosity without any Grace without any forgiveness. You
So it's hard nosed kind of approach to things. That's when you take the legal issues. So anyone who tries to that's the problem with people approaching marriage today, trying to say, oh, yeah, Islamic marriage. So automatically they go to the books, what is my husband's obligations, she makes sure he knows each one of them. And he commits to all of them by the letter.
He does the same.
Most likely this marriage is not going to work. Most likely this life is going to be *. Why? His marriage and this is what it's called. This is called a difficulty or Barbet fatigue. Okay. It's more like a principle. In fact, in the area of marriage, the scholars say
a common Nikka Emma Alamosa?
What
am I let's call him at all Helen Moshe ha.
With a marriage, the attitude the overall attitude is what? Grace, forgiveness, generosity.
With dealings transactions. The dominant attitude is what?
Justice and everyone gets the right.
clear cut.
I'm not happy with this condition. Okay, how can we solve it?
You owe me let's say, for example, let's say $300.
You give me 270. You owe me 30. Still,
you know, but let it go. No, that's not how Islam that's these are not the etiquettes of transactions in Islam. It's not how it goes. Now, if I say you know what, I'll take 250.
I don't want that 50 Keep it, that's fine. That's good. And that's great thing. But it's not the basic rule, that's you go out of your way to do this. Why? Because no marriage can survive with this kind of transactional approach, like we are in the market, and competition. And it's like,
I either eat you or you eat me, like I eat your right or you eat my right, you will not in a war that sets the tone for a marriage to be more of a warzone. And this is how it's going to be everyone is going to be watching the other, trying to catch them at fault. Try to catch them red handed. And when they do that, they are not going to let go them and they're gonna make sure they put you down. No marriage works like that. If you do this, you're not a good husband, you're not even a good human being. If you do that you're not a good wife, and you can't be a good human being and you can't be a good father, you can't be a good mother with that kind of attitude. So in Islam, this is what it
goes missing. Always.
o'clock versus the,
the term of the last resort, they are the guidelines in the background. But the way people deal with each other is by the clock.
This is why the Scholars actually they have in their books, they have a camel Bojo and they have a hullabaloo
they have a colorful boy. They have the manners in which you deal with things. This is why if you take a stand mathematically, you don't Why do you are carrying
that this is more of interference. Why from the legal system of the day.
The legal system of today
is
what is so hard nosed is so difficult to deal with. And it literally like it puts you back to the wall.
So you have you sign an agreement with someone, right? Let's say you sign a rent agreement, and some emergency pops up. Right? And you need to three more days.
Right? What's going to happen
you'll have to pay your full month or you will have to leave or I'll call police or whatever.
Like okay, this is like a difficult situation emergency. I didn't that's it, I don't know you
know, whatever loss you have to pay for that.
And you might say Yeah, but you know the landlord they have their own of obligations and commitments. Yeah, take that that carries over from one level to the other. The same thing, this is how the bank deals with the landlord.
This is how everything goes.
Okay. So the legal system here is and who sets who sets the rulings? How are they decided? The legal system sets the moral tone for society. anything illegal seemed to is deemed to be shameful in this society. If you are outwardly do something if you do something illegal outwardly, you know,
people will not tolerate you.
People will not tolerate you. They will see you as an outlaw
renegade
as a troublemaker.
And who sets these rules?
Human beings, human beings set these rules, they set what's right and what's wrong, based on what?
Based on a philosophy, what is the philosophy, it has to do with the dominance of the state.
The dominance of the modern state, a modern state is the new god that is being worshipped. The advancement of the state in terms of its power, in terms of its capitalistic progress, finances, economy, and so on and so forth. And its dominance over the individuals. That's the ultimate goal of the legal system.
That's the ultimate goal. That's the guiding
principle for the legal system, whereas it is so so there is no, there is no moral cushion around it. There is no moral environment for it, it doesn't grow within a moral environment. What's right, and what's wrong is decided based on what? Based on arbitrary principles that are chosen by a specific type of people, right. And these specific type of people, there is a lot of influence on them, the ones who make the law, the legislature, the one in the legislation, legislation, how do these people get picked?
By elections? What affects elections the most? And this is something that's well known in political theory, what is it capital,
money,
corporations.
So that sets the tone for the legal spirit of the society. Whereas in Islam, it's the other way around.
You have divine principles of morality that you live by. And one of the systems that support it and establish it is the legal system in Islam.
Part of that is what you see or hear when it comes to marriage and divorce.
When it comes to marriage and divorce, so this is why if you take the systemic legal system, try to understand it with a modern mind. It doesn't make sense. Why? Because it doesn't function on its own. It functions within what within an environment of moral principles. And among the best of them is grace. The concept of gracefulness, which is Alfred, Alfred, that there is idle, idle is justice you take what's yours, I take what's mine clear lines, we draw a clear line between us. And football is ungrateful and generous and forgiving.
And this grease is the you know, relationships, smooth them out.
So, so this is how it works in Islam. This how the legal system works, in some sense, a drastic difference. It's a drastic difference. And if, for some reason for some contingency, you happen to break the law, for a genuine reason that is in line with the morality, the absolute morality of Islam, you are forgiven. And that's a concession. Another interesting aspect of the legal system is that, you know, the legal system today is so elaborate, is like infinitely expanding every day. There is more legislations, there is more regulations, there are laws, there are bylaws, you have to govern everything, and there's everyday new situations and new configurations of situations. And you
need to keep making laws and laws and laws and rules until, you know, no one can keep up with the laws. And this is why if you just need to defend yourself in the court system, in a very simple case, what do you need, you need a lawyer.
And it incurs you know, huge amount of finances. And if you don't know the law, if you can't speak the language of the law, right? And it's so beyond the normal, normal human being. And your opponent is able to, you know, get a lawyer or their their lawyer is paid by
somebody or something. Right? You have no chances and your case is going to stay in court for how many years? sometimes four or 510 years. Right. And sometimes you're innocent, and you have done nothing.
In Islam, it's not like that. In Islam, the legal system is the language of the people.
People understood the language of the court, and you didn't need a lawyer. This is why lawyers are a new invention.
Yeah, Muslim, any Muslim who had an issue, there was an issue. It's within a few days, it's completely sorted out. Everyone takes the right everyone goes their way is done. You don't pay any fees. You don't pay any lawyers. And you can defend yourself. You and the and the judge speak the same language.
It's the language of the Quran. The guidelines are clear.
Was very simple issue. People defended themselves without an issue. And even sometimes the governor would stand before the judge. If someone complains about them.
No lawyer not
They have no superiority, they have no favoritism, nothing was so simple, so straightforward. There was no technicality, there was no legal technicality. And even if someone needed if a case was complicated, and it needed some feel like it was complex, in terms of the judge, it's the obligation of the judge, to educate the people who are, who are in this case was in or involved in this case, and make sure that they make an informed judgment.
How beautiful was that?
And there is no, like, two months, one year, two years, five years, 10 years until, you know, the cause, you know, you get, you get the hearing, and then the revision and, and more hearing and more witnesses and so on. No, it was all done in the in the matter of a few days, and it's over, and everyone gets with their own life.
But it was all done in principle, and there was always reconciliation would be given priority, and so on and so forth. We needed to put this kind of introduction in order to, for you to know, in what context, these rulings apply so that you understand them, we put them in the natural environment. So they make sense. Because if we don't know that environment, we just going to project it, you know, what we don't, and that's extreme that lacks that's foreign territory for for Islamic legal system. It doesn't fit in there.
Yeah, so again, with marriage, there is a clear structure create a clear hierarchy for the marriage. So the husband is responsible.
And again, it's not seen as power, power is all of this the way looking at looking at it as power. And that's it's offensive to me, that someone has a level of authority over me, we have to be at the same level of authority. And this is why you know, no one's getting married. This is why marriages are broken.
Allah created us and He knows what's right for us. And there is no offense, it's just the big ego that again, our culture today builds in every one of us. So we have a big ego and we're not willing, but only we're not willing to, you know, accept any authority when it's in the household.
But when it's in the, in the corporation, in your employment,
you will accept all authority, and you won't question it. And you will always say Yes, sir.
No questions asked. I'll do what you ask of me.
Work from home, you know, work here and work overtime at home. Yes, sir. Clean the washrooms Yes, sir.
Make me tea. Yes, sir.
We know that. We know that. And there's a lot about power. There is a lot of power games. But you know what, that's not offensive. That doesn't injure my ego.
Why? Because I'm professional. I'm on my way to whatever, whatever whenever.
And you know what's happening, people are just getting older and they are living by themselves.
People are getting miserable.
And you wonder why there is a lot of mental health issues. Why people there's depression what people are struggling what people are committing suicide.
Any question? What people killing their children?
And you hear incidents every now and then. Yeah.
So again, the thing is,
this is this is a common feature today is that there is so much arrogance about you know, the way of life that we live, and when we're not seeing the amount of damage that it's creating. But we just simply have the guts to criticize everything else without even knowing how it functions. That's a very, that's not an innocent attitude by any degree.
And it's important to catch ourselves doing this. Okay, so
So in Islam, the, the one who's in charge in the family is the man this is what the Quran says, will literally tell you
and this is what Allah addresses the one who's in charge. But again, people will say oh, but but that, you know, there are men who abused their wives. Yes, these are not men.
And man who abuses their dependents their wife, their children is not a man
is not a man. And in Islam and this you might you might say Oh, but there's a lot of that. Yes, because we are the product of our times our times there is no moral education. Look at the surah Tala What does Allah speak all the time? Well may yet tequila Ah, hello, Maharajah askin Owen. I mean Hi through Second John.
What Atala Rohan little no Yoko la hin, Allah says, Allah is warning that you don't mistreat them. You don't take advantage of them. You don't abuse them. You don't put any pressure on them.
To take a ransom to make them give up any of their rights. And if you do that, they are not your opponent. Allah is your opponent. That's what Allah is saying.
So the legal system comes you might say oh,
By the legal system gives the man authority, that means he's going to abuse. Again, that's when you take Islam out of its context.
Islam builds the base course it sets the base course for that, which is a moral, the moral character, and that marriage is a noble thing. And that when you are a husband, it's a responsibility and a great responsibility and the way for you to enter Jannah, what the biggest way for you to indigenous take care of your family and treat them well with dignity, never abuse.
That's what Islam says. But again, there will be that, you know, minority of men within this good context with this moral education, where the whole again, the whole, the whole social fabric creates that kind of connections and exercises this kind of powerful, powerful influence, to be a dignified human being and treat your family with dignity and honor. Because if a man abused their, their wife, for example of their children, you know, they were, they would receive a lot of heat from society,
around them from their brothers, from their sisters from their family, and they wouldn't be able to live a normal life. This is why it was extremely difficult. A whole society, you know, is tight together, that it protects its own members, it doesn't allow her husband to abuse the wife
doesn't allow the wife to abuse the husband doesn't abuse children, when they get older, to abuse their parents. It doesn't allow them to do this. The degeneration happens, you know, in the last few, you know,
started last few centuries, but it is sort of accelerated exacerbated in the last few decades. And that's what we have witnessed, but we don't know. But this is why we need to read our history. And we need to read the detailed history about social life and about how people lived with Islam. So Now someone says, oh, with this level of authority, a husband can abuse their wife, that's because you are applying this in a modern context, no, in a context where it doesn't belong. They can't it's extremely difficult. And if someone does that, you know, there is the legal system.
There is the legal system, and no one can get away with abusing their wife or abusing the children. No one in the legal system of Islam, with that social fabric. And that justice system, no one can get away with abuse, no one.
So that's how we deal with abuse. But if you just help get everyone to have a very big ego and not accept anything, and they can't live with anyone, no one can live with them. How is this even good for anyone, because people need marriage. People who are married and that's in studies, it's known that people who are married, generally speaking, they live longer, they are healthier, they are happier, and so on. And they are wealthier, and so on and so forth.
It's It's human nature, we need that.
We need that as human. That's the That's the natural context in which we live. It's an anomaly for someone not to live within a family.
So you know how far we are from human human nature.
So this is the context in which the surah really speaks. So this is why Allah addresses the prophets arson, and the husband, and specifically the men here. Why? Because
the burden falls on them.
That in case a marriage is not working, that you're going to do it gracefully, and with dignity and without causing any harm, giving
your divorce see all of her rights and making sure she walks out of the marriage with her head. Hi.
That's how it goes in Islam.
And this is probably one of the reasons that you're not today, if someone is divorced, it's very hard for her to get married. No one wants her
in the past, at the time of the prophets of Salaam and many years afterwards.
a divorcee would be more likely to be married than a woman who's never been married before. There were sought after.
The most sought after they were appreciated for their experience for their maturity in life.
And probably, again, for for other reasons we don't know about.
Because that's the system we didn't live in, we just get to read about it, we get if we get to read about it, we hear about it if we get to hear about it. But a lot of a lot of us have just fancy ideas far fetched from the reality of that system, where we are doing a lot of projection from our times and just applying Islam, trying to see how Islam would apply or how a specific, you know, elements of it would apply in a completely foreign context where it doesn't belong with the dynamics are not compatible. And then we say oh, you know, but that's problem the way Islam addresses this issue. And we speaking like intellectuals like we know what we're talking about.
So that so that's that's a problem.
The other very important point here is that look at we said Allah subhanaw taala speaks in the Quran speaks in general guidelines and then the Prophet SAW Selim said, Look at salah, did Allah tell you how to pray salah and the Quran? You stand up recite
Surah Fatiha another solar than Allahu Akbar Maria Croco Subhanallah big ugly, semi Allah, anything in the Quran like this nothing no details about the Salah where are the details, Salah is what
after she had attained is the pillar of Islam, the main pillar of Islam, right, I'm going to do in the province of Salah, the main pillar in Islam that holds the the building of Islam holds the weight of the building of Islam. And with that, then
the first thing you will be questioned about Quran doesn't tell you about the details. Why does Allah talk about divorce? The difference in our situations in divorce, the times of divorce, what's correct divorce was not correct, how to give them the rights, how long they should live in the house.
Why? Because Allah doesn't want anyone to play with them. And you want to interpret that it's clear cut, because this is a very sensitive matter. And it could get very bitter, and it's already a very stressful situation. So there's no need to make it more stressful. And we know that anyone who goes through divorce these days, they're ruined. They are ruined. And there is a lot of like funny cases. Haunting fun is the right word, but a lot of tragedies in the courts. People are ruined children are ruined. people's career and future and finances are completely done for life.
It wasn't like that.
It wasn't like that at all. It was everyone would walk up with dignity and everyone would get their rights and everyone would get a new chance in life.
And no one would walk away with bitterness. This is how it worked. So Allah Santo through these winnings, make sure that this is what happens but look at most of the endings of the verses or word just let's go over the endings of the verses
Yeah, Allah says that Audrina first verse letter delete Allah, Allah, you had this rather than the camera, you don't know Maybe Allah will make something happen, and it will change.
So when you divorce them again, I don't want to go into the rulings. We just read them with the translation. So that sort of gives you an idea. But Allah Subhana Allah says during the rate that the waiting period of the woman, she stays in her house, Allah says latoken Johanna Minwoo ut hinda Allah says it's her house, who provides the house you provided. Allah says as long as she lives in the house, it's her house,
that you want them in booty hidden, he didn't say that. You want them to come and booty Hannah, from their houses, their homes.
So Allah says, Last 100, Allah, Allah, your little by the delicate block, she stays there. So hopefully, maybe the marriage happened in a moment of anger, moment, frustration, of frustration, whatever. Now you have time, say three months, three, about three months, you can visit that again. Think about it again. Think about the long term consequences. Sometimes we work you know, we act based on impulse.
So Allah gives you a chance and you know you you have two chances before the third time that says she's divorced for good.
But you have chances. And this is why a man should not rush to divorce and to pronouncing divorce at a whim should be very careful with that. So Allah says, look at our Allah help guides us morally, and practically to deal with the situation. And this shows me that morality is extremely practical. Morality is not just some aesthetic aspect is not for Beautification and decoration. Morality is practical, in essence, is practical. It captures the deepest dynamics of this life lattre de la la la la cumbre in t take it easy, be patient you don't know things change. And I personally have seen people come for divorce and give it two three weeks and then and they were like they were so adamant
to get divorce two three weeks and I said oh great glad we did go through a divorce.
Humans we change we go through phases, right sometimes something overtakes us and anger you know resentment etcetera. But we go back to our combat our senses is different. So it's important not to act on a whim or in a in an in a state that is not good for you to make long term decisions. Verse number two, Allah says
that indicates that the community will behave and carry with me no reliable human.
Who is given these these commands and these guidelines
Those who believe in Allah and the Last Day, because that that should be the reason you abide by this even when you don't like it, even when you think it's a disadvantage. You have to commit Why are you dealing with Allah? Allah doesn't say you're dealing with your diversity. No, you're dealing with ALLAH, so don't mess with Allah. That's a protection for her.
And it's not just an empty protection because if you mess around with that, the whole fabric of society as Islam builds it, the whole legal system
is not going to give you any space to do that. You're not going to get away with it. You will be held accountable, you will pay for it.
When we get to Pilla, Hydra Loma Raja and whoever has Taqwa to Allah subhanaw taala, Allah is gonna give him a way out or give her a way out. So Allah says, if you are just trying to abuse the other person, take advantage of them, make it hard for them, thinking you're just, you know, avenging yourself, or you're just making things easy for you, you can a little more cash squeezing a little more benefit out of them. You think that's good for you, Allah says one way yet to be lived alone. Even if it's very tight and difficult for you act with Dakwah do the best act in the best ways, Allah will give you a way out. Don't be you know, held captive to the immediate dynamics.
Tap into the bigger the greater dynamics of our Allah runs this life.
You do good Allah will bring your way out.
So don't don't work it out only mathematically. We are assuming Hey, today I tested and Allah provides for that person, the male and the female, from ways from sources they never expected
when we get a worker and Allah even worse, but whoever puts their trust in Allah to run their affairs, so you do good. You do what Allah tells you to do you behave the way that Allah tells you to behave, even though there is temptation to behave in other ways. But you know what, what holds you back? One of them is that I entrust my affairs with Allah. I know what Allah tells me to do is the best even though I don't see how it's going to work out to be good for me. I'm just going to rely on alone. That's how it works. That's how but now if I can, you know put you in trouble, I'll put you in trouble even if it means I lie I twist in the court. You know, you see unbelievable
stuff.
People just want to destroy each other, ruin each other. The amount of anger resentment, that's because of what
you know we're not we're not living by how Allah subhanaw taala told us to our hearts are so poisoned.
In Allah valuable and Rahim Allah will bring his decision to effect what Allah decides will happen.
But Allah is Allah controls this life. So don't worry, do as Allah says, Trust Allah subhanaw taala and things will just go well for you.
But God Allah when you condition, Allah subhanaw taala has made an appointed time and amount for everything that Allah on his creation. That's the best Imam as Ali says, Lisa fit him can feel min max and min maca. You've been telling me it confirms this. He says that's a good statement.
People say if he only were different if we only were different, what they are saying the Muslim scholars I see, you know, what Allah brings about is the best version possible version of reality for you, within the purpose of what testing you, somebody might say, Why Why doesn't love make everything rosy? That's not what this life is created for. That's an agenda. Allah created agenda for that. And Allah created people for that. And he put them through the test so they make it there. So don't expect Jana here. But the best version of re of possible reality Allah brings it into your life. Lisa bill in Canada
there's nothing better than what Allah brings about.
So rest assured that all of your theories about how the world should work or how your life should be. All of that is deception. You don't know what's you know the problems that are in that you just don't know about them. So trust Allah.
Woman yet the biller is allowing me to hear your straw and whoever has an axe with Taqwa Allah will bring ease to their affairs.
You see, this is how you discuss what fatigue issues very critical, delicate, sensitive for key issues with what Aqeedah
This is why you can't take free code filter with our data without without test Skia what does that need to do impure it does this get your heart and nourishes your heart conditions your heart, purifies your heart grows your heart. So you are conscious of Allah you are connected to Allah you are obedient to Allah you are loving of Allah. You turn into a graceful, beautiful, decent human being.
That's what actually that does. When you approach it well not approach it just for polemics and discussions and fights. That's not what it is.
done for when you internalize it in that way,
then you can deal with it. And you deal with Victor you deal gracefully.
You don't deal with the clock mathematics and then it works well. So, this is how thick the you know the the strictness and the, the sharp edges of flick which are very very clear and and very precise, is tempered by the gracefulness of happiness and the beauty of the heart of a believer. They go they go together, they go together this is why they are connected in such a way
and this is how we should approach Islam as we learned approach the Quran as we approach as we learn it approach the Sunnah as we learn when people don't do that people become what police agents right starting to police everyone else or you know, you shouldn't be wearing this color. Where's your hair cut like this?
This color of your socks is no good for Salah and this and this and you pleasing people
and just you making off putting for people to you know even to practice Islam or to be around in the masjid.
So and again, that's that's a gray violet violation against Allah. People think oh, it's okay to be strict. No, you are violating the limits of Allah, you're committing crimes. No matter what you call yourself, you are committing crimes.
Yep. Okay, so sorry, we needed to put this context it would help us understand why these details are mentioned in such a way and how to understand them. Otherwise, it's easy, it's very easy, you know, just take these things out of context, apply a modern context to them and then be puzzled by Why does Allah says these things in this way? What is why Why does it have to be like this? Why does Allah talk to men about this issue? Why not talk to women about these issues? Yeah, these are questions that come from you know, a lot of programming that you need to revisit and you need to question we can take a couple of questions to Sharla before
we continue next week with the Solar Beam
two questions and hopefully they are relevant
brothers
I know this this topic
almost every day on which topic this one yeah divorce
Okay, today's society
is not only
after
you mentioned that one
applies to my painting and that is
to say they never been taught how to do the issue
why did it what is the possible
that's what the ones that are
official returning generation
getting
this society from
Okay, can I summarize the the brother says,
How can we educate the younger generation on the proper understanding approach of Islam rather than let them you know, ingest all of this stuff, which is not helpful. Well, if you can come up with a way that you know,
it's a source of frustration.
It's like again, this is
the Arabs they say in a cat or Johanne What can I do like you opened an old wound?
I don't know a lot I don't know. I wish I know. I wish I know.
You can see I'm talking a lot but I'm trying to compensate. So that's why you see me going on a tangent here and there but I know talking doesn't do much. Hopefully it does a little but that's the that's the best I know so far. Like, sisters. Oh, there's a question here. So smell.
So no need to answer this in public because it's sensitive. But what I would say to this is to ask this question, this is Blackmagic. This is Jen.
Don't go there at all. It's not a matter of being sinful or not. It's a matter of that's going to ruin your children.
Question
You guys, same department, so I need to give someone else then I'll come back to you if any sisters
have asked you one
quick because they have to go there that
is the only good deed that goes to the parents.
It depends if, if. So, again, we just said it, but we didn't want to go into the explanation. The good that children do goes to their parents, obviously when their parents are good. So when the parents are bad,
and you have an influence, generational influence of evil that runs through the family, what do you expect to happen?
You kick started a cascade. So obviously
that's the general rule.
Mandara Hill Illa Hunan, Canada whom, mythological Tabby, Rahu mercury and Yonkos on uranium shaver, woman Illallah that in Canada, who
is moment, Pamela via learning for Sudanic I'm in utter mayhem, Sharia,
whoever the guy invites to, or guides or causes guidance and good, then he will get the same reward as those who get influenced by him or her
without reducing of theirs. And whoever calls to his guidance to evil brings about causes that cascade, right, then they will get the same sin as the people who get influenced by that without taking from the center of those people. So that's the general rule.
So that means Be careful, because it's not like you if you're not a good parents, you get away yeah, I'm not get I'm just okay, I'm not getting so many great rewards. No, you're probably getting if you're a bad influence, and if by default, if you are not a good influence, you are already a bad influence. There's no way in between. Okay, so Allah Azza Messina, Muhammad Ali. He was hard to hear Jimmy