Having a Magnetic Personality
Channel: Mohammad Elshinawy
File Size: 18.27MB
Episode Transcript ©
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All Praise and Glory be to Allah we thank him and we seek His help and his guidance and his Fletcher and his forgiveness and we seek protection with our love from the evil whispers within ourselves and from the awful consequences that could result from our evil deeds. For whomever Allah azza wa jal guides, none can lead astray and whoever Allah Tabata Calots it leaves a straight and uncut ever guide. And we testify that no one is worthy of our worship and our devotion and our love and obedience in the absolute sense of those words, but Allah and Allah alone, without any partners, the true supreme King, at the Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was in truth without doubt,
His Prophet and his servant and His messenger and the best of his creation and the seal of his revelation, and the most beloved of the slaves of Allah to Allah. After welcoming myself and yield to the house of Allah azza wa jal and reminding myself and you with the Taqwa of Allah, to live a life that is dutiful to Allah to Baraka, with the Allah consistent with him, loving in our submission, and submission, submitting in an expression of love to him subhanahu wa taala.
My brothers and sisters, I mentioned to some of you recently, and briefly that I used to have a friend that used to be the most successful person I've ever seen in Dawa, one on one conversations about Islam and people would come by night and by day to the fold through conversations with him. And he would give that out to anything that moved basically, we saved the chair moved, he would speak to it, like he was always on edge waiting for an opportunity to find an inroad to tell someone about the treasure that is Islam.
And one time he came to me and said to me, I had a very interesting conversation today with my neighbor. Outside of his building, he said there was a woman that was clearly devout to her religious tradition. Southern Baptists are known by their attire, longer skirts, big bonnet hat. And she was an elderly woman, he kept talking to her about Islam, and she just stopped him. She said, Listen, no matter what you say, it's not gonna work. Don't try. There's no point I'll never buy it. You will never persuade me to become a Muslim. Do you know why?
She said, Because Jesus speaks to me at night. He comes to me, and He speaks to me and I have a one on one connection with him a personal one.
And so he didn't want to sort of like engage directly and tell her about how ridiculous this is. to base your faith on a voice you hear in your head, right? Like it is intuitive and natural. And we already should know that there is a God, there is a supreme being there's an almighty, but how do you know that voice in your head is actually the voice of God or a voice from God and angel or otherwise? So he said, there would be no point in trying to tell her this. Let me just show her. So he left her alone says a dead end. And he came back to her a few days later. And he said to her, you are right. I believed in Him. And He spoke to me to Jesus spoke to me as well. So she got very happy
for a second until he sort of showed his cards. And he said, but he said he didn't know you. He said he never spoke to you before in his life. So she got very upset. And she said to him, you were not speaking to Jesus, you were speaking to the devil.
So he said to her lady, one of us was speaking to the devil. How do we figure out which one? We cannot base our fates in nothingness like this invoice is in the dark. But what's so interesting, and perhaps the greatest reason why I remember this story is that even this very thoughtful demonstration is very patient strategy still didn't work. She still didn't become Muslim. She still did not give up. That's religion.
Why? Because this was her religion, the religion of her community, the religion of her parents, the religion of her upbringing, the religion of her society, the religion of her environment. And that is the takeaway, that what we are Allah created us as human beings as social creatures, meaning we want to connect with others. We want to belong to groups, we're social creatures. And so what we've been socialized on what society has sort of put on us, is very hard to shake off, very hard to shake off. And that is why from the great wisdom of the Quran, is that it turns people's attention to this all the time.
Every time we sent a messenger to them, Allah says, Paul, who in our
Ummah, they say, We found our forefathers following a certain tradition. We're not going to break away from this collective this community, historical, no, we're not going to do it.
And even Allah azza wa jal says
That Ibrahim alayhi salam called them out on this issue and said to them in Namath the health domain Dooney Allah He al Thanhha mela data Unicom, Phil hayati dunya you are just accepting these like idols these statues you guys made with your own hands, carve them with your own tools, you only accept them as a god mellette debts have been nickel just for the sake of the bonds the warmth of the social bonds that relationship between you you guys just try not to rock the boat on each other. You're trying not to ruin Christmas or ruin the holidays or ruin the gatherings that's it you guys don't actually believe this. As Allah Baraka without I said to them in a third place in the Quran.
Kev hold on Kelly Mehta and Tuscaloosa mean FYI, him it's such a grand lie that comes out of their mouths. It's not actually coming out of like due process and thought and from their heart. They're just repeating it it's hopping from tongue to tongue. It's an inherited statement just being echoed parents back and forth at fo Luna Illa. Khadija even though it is nothing but a lie what they claim, no matter how many times it's said it's just just a lie. A parroted lie.
This is actually an extremely important and useful tool for us to operate with in mind when giving Dawa, whether to Muslims or non Muslims, giving Dawa to Muslims to come a little closer and their commitment to the reality of Islam. Or to stop them from reconsidering Islam and walking out to keep a Muslim Muslim. Keep this in mind, that need for the social element that need for the emotional element. And of course, inviting people to Islam as well.
One of the most important things to keep in mind is that people want to belong, people want to connect with others. And so if you are someone's doorway to Islam, that's all I'm going to say today is called, then make sure they want to associate with you. Faith by association is the most common reason. But people many times are not thoughtful enough to recognize that maybe they don't want to maybe on the problem, maybe they don't want to associate with me. And this happens on every level. Like on the parental level parents many times due to not considering this factor. What is the atmosphere like between me and my children, for example, they could in with good intentions be
pushing them farther away, not drawing them closer and closer. There's actually a weak Hadith not traceable to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam where he stopped them from chasing down a runaway camel and said to them the more you chase, the more he runs, give him a reason to come back offer him something.
This same applies to human beings do we give people our children even a reason for them to be around us? enough of a reason?
What's the atmosphere like? How positive is the atmosphere?
You know, is the atmosphere more stress free or stress filled more positive or more negative? Think about that. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said methadone Mini can method in Nagla. The example of the believer is like the example of the honeybee. It you know honey bees just hover around the plants. They hover around their environment, they seek out the nectar of every flower. They seek out the good stuff in the gatherings. Right? And they give back even better stuff. They give back the honey itself. He says it only consumes the good and pleasant and emits good and pleasant. What? And it lands without breaking anything. Are you delicate in your gatherings? Or are
you someone that is critical? Someone that is always talking and never listening? And so on and so forth? So number one, how positive is the gathering? Are you like the honey beat? Or are you like the fly? You know the fly? The Fly only lands on nasty things only lands on Rotten carcasses only lands on Forgive me feces. Some people have the personality of a fly. And they are the reason whether they realize it or not for people not to want to associate with them. And that could mean not associated with their religion. They represent the faith they wish to impart on others.
So do you focus on the praise worthy and do you praise it? Or are you someone that shames others the moment they make a mistake and highlight it and focus in on it and are critical of it?
You know you think of Ennis Sydney Malik Radi Allahu Allah and he said that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was served by me. I served him for 10 years. He never said to me about anything. I did. Why did you do that? And anything he I didn't do. Why didn't you do that? That doesn't mean he wasn't teaching him he was guiding him. salAllahu alayhi wasallam but not critically, not shaming him right?
When he would forget or sometimes be stubborn sometimes be hard headed. He would go
Oh, patiently and remind him again.
He would ask him as if he doesn't know didn't, you know, did you get that done, he knows he didn't get it done. But it's the gentler way to do things.
And also part of wanting people to be around us that when they make the mistake,
give them room quickly to outgrow their mistake. You know, like if you get into a tense moment with your child or with a friend, let them know it's over very quickly, right? Soon as the problem has been recognized. The mistake has been on, move past it right away, invite them to the dinner table, ask them out somewhere change the subject you do that
you think 100 milliliter of the Allah on how the Prophet alayhi salatu salam dealt with him he had become Muslim. He was a new Muslim. And he was he was a little bit hasty. And he remained a little bit hasty for many years, even after the prophets death, because he was very confident and very aggressive. And he's award general and it comes with the comes with the territory. And he went and killed people due to a misunderstanding during one of the battles. The Prophet alayhi salaatu wa said didn't cancel him, right didn't allow people to sort of never make use of him and his skill again, he said Allahumma inni, abroad illegally my son I file it. And that was pretty much the end
of it. Oh Allah, I declare my innocence from what Carly did not from Khalid, but from college action. So also when you need to point something out, point out the action, not the person, it is the more correct way to do things.
And Osama bin is he who is the son of the adopted son of the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam so technically or in essence, in a large sense, he was his grandson. They used to call him Hibou ape, the most beloved of the most beloved,
which was they didn't inherit at the adopted son of the Prophet SAW Salem, his son Osama. He wants out there was a man slaughtering Muslims left and right in the battlefield. They finally chase him down, he slips and falls. Just when he knows that he's finished. He says Leila Hola, hola. I'm Muslim, I'm Muslim. So Salman has become a fool and he kills him. And news gets back to the Prophet salAllahu alayhi wasallam. And then when they get back to Medina, he says to him, Osama Did you open his chest to see if he was saying it just to protect himself?
Someone says Muslims Muslim, that's it. He has to prove after that, that he's no longer Muslim. Right? Or that he was faking it or otherwise. Right? This is a battlefield situation.
But still, even then he says what are you going to do? Is it seek forgiveness for me? Yeah. Rasulullah. He said, What are you going to do on the Day of Judgment when that La ilaha illa comes after you? He said seek forgiveness for me he wouldn't immediately he wanted to make sure he felt how serious it was. Once he did. That was the end of it. He did not allow the mistake of Osama to define Osama. The proof of that is the very last army the Prophet authorized sallallahu alayhi wa sallam before he died was known as the army of Osama. Right. He was 17 years old leading Abu Bakr and Omar.
And so this is the type of positivity this is the type of empowerment. This is the type of magnetic personality. The Prophet Allah is for those that are mad, which cause people to want to be around him. Want to associate with him want to socialize with him. sal Allahu Allahu alayhi wa sallam called the Holy Hado start from the very welcome.
hamdu Lillahi wa salatu salam ala Milena V Avada. Shadow Allah, Allah illallah, WA hola Shigella, or shadow Anna, Mohammed and Abu whenever you who are sudo.
The next tip I want to give you for people to want to be around you is that when you are in their attendance be present. They say there's a difference between being present meaning attentive, giving them your attention, versus being physically in attendance physically present two different things, right?
We have many times when we can build foster relationships. And I know people have this automatic defense mechanism when we speak about you know, their devices, their phones and otherwise, but connect with people. seek out opportunities to connect with them to listen to them to show them you're interested in them. If you want them to be interested in you show them that you're interested in them. That is of the ways you pull people towards you and make them want to socialize with you. You want to know their name. You want to know what happened today. You want to know their desires. You want to learn their keys really, right. You want to know what their insecurities are their
worries, their fears, all of that be present. And there are more opportunities to that than you think. You are there many times for hours around your family or around people but unless you notice things you will not be able to make use of them channels
And in a positive direction, and simply listening to people as positive enough.
And I'll give you two more quickly, the first of them is have low expectations of people, obviously, you will have more expectations of your family than of others, right. But still, especially with your family, and especially if you're a parent, you still want to lower it a little bit. Because many times, you know, the wishing your child wants to be better than you, this is natural. This is fitrah. But it could instill in your child this, I'm never good enough, I'm always inadequate, because the bar is always so high. And so you having too high of an expectation, they have to be the most you know, respectful all the time and the most intelligent and the most skillful in every
respect that caused them to feel no competence. And then they're gonna go want to associate with someone else that makes them feel competent.
And I always tell people, Don't you dare if you have a daughter only praise her for her beauty, because that's going to make her so superficial, right? All she is, is external beauty. But at the same time, if you never praise her beauty, she may be so thirsty to go outside and seek it. And that may make it a struggle for her to be remained protected by her Islam and all the teachings of Islam in this regard. If your child doesn't know that they have certain strengths, they won't have any confidence and they'll be Tagalongs and bandwagon errs for the rest of their life. Right? Your child does not have to be what you imagined them to be. People don't have to be even your peers as
respectful or as level headed as you think you are. Lower your expectations of people to keep that relationship alive.
And lastly, and most importantly, walk the talk. Nobody likes to be around the hypocrite nobody does.
You know there is a Hadith in Bukhari and Muslim that is quite frightening. Where the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says a man will be taken on the Day of Judgment thrown into the Hellfire
for 10 Delic taboo and his insights his intestines and his organs will all fall out.
Your jaw roll Kosova who phenol and he'll be made to drag around his organs in the fire. You adore how Allah and he's walking around it in a frenzy the way he does a donkey walks around the mill, a mill.
He's in the people of the fire all get around him. And they say what in the world? How'd you get here? Weren't you the person that kept preaching to me to do good things and stay away from bad things?
And he says yes, I used to tell you to do the right thing and not do it come to America will model it well and how cool man on the moon can you wear it and I would forbid you from wrong things and I would do it.
In the scholar said perhaps why these people have the most severe punishment is because they deterred from the Path of Allah more than anyone. Every time their statement said go this way. Their action said Don't you dare Don't you dare if it was true, if Islam was true, forget true if Islam was valuable, I would have done it myself. And so people are not able to hear their words because their actions are so loud in the opposite direction.
So may Allah subhanho wa Taala make us and you people of integrity that are upright people that are personable and agreeable in ways that bring others towards us and bring others to guidance through us, our families and those in the circles beyond them. Allahumma Amin, May Allah guide us and rectify us, conceal our flaws and forgive our sins, fortify the bonds between us and our loved ones and make that a means of nearness to him and stand before him in an upright fashion on the Day of Judgment. May Allah azza wa jal forgive those that are sick.
The grandmother of one of our family members, brother and Ron's grandmother knows a basic and also remember throughout your day if you can one of the pioneers of the data in North America
revolutionized huge aspects of a chef Mohammed the chef who passed away suddenly yesterday may Allah have mercy on them and all those that deceased among the Muslims and accept from them all they've done for this deen and in this Deen Allah Huma Alameen wa sallahu wa salam