Hosai Mojaddidi – The Definition of Happiness
AI: Summary ©
AI: Transcript ©
Bismillah AR Rahman any, so you guys have a good New Year's?
Right?
So this is an interesting time of the year, I think for all of us,
it's interesting, because there seems to be like a shift that
happens like a collective, or an awakening of some type, you know,
or our collective conscience is waking up around the end of the
year, every year it happens.
And people start, I think, questioning, you know, there,
maybe their lives, their choices in the previous year, what they
did, what they didn't do their goals, and maybe even their own
mortality. Right? You start, I mean, every year, that passes,
you're a year older. So I think you just start facing,
facing those questions that you're avoiding all year long. And that's
why you have this thing that happens every year around this
time, where everybody suddenly wants to be better, and they want
to, they have all these resolutions, and they start
planning and making all these changes. So it's a really
interesting time of year. From the spiritual perspective, we should
be doing that type of self analysis, not once a year, right?
Not at the end of every year, when how often should that happen?
Every single day, right? So every single day, we should be going
through this, you know, process of really thinking about what we did
during the day. You know, this is called Maha Sabha. Right? Where
you actually are taking yourself to account. You're looking back
from the start of your day. How are you? First important question,
most important question. If you want to, at the end of every day,
at your, you know, in bed, and you're thinking about your day,
what's the most important thing that you should be thinking about
first?
Right, how is your Salah, right?
Right? Oh, you want me to put this one on two? Okay, sorry.
Sure. Okay, this one, that clip is not working here. I'm sorry.
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figure this out. But I can hold it. It's not even on. Oh, wait,
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Yeah. Okay. Got it. Thank you.
So our prayers write the most important thing that we should be
looking at every single day.
From the beginning of the day, but also at the end of the day. I
mean, if you're doing the evaluation process at the end, you
want to look at how are your prayers? Right. That's the most
important thing. Why is that the most important thing?
To look at, look at and then if it's good, then
whenever you destroy your life, it will be accepted.
Yes.
Like,
like, the PC connection with a little like, if that trample, then
your connection with
grandpa?
Absolutely. I mean, if your prayers aren't there, then yeah,
you can't really hold on. Right. But to your point, you know, the
very first thing that we're all going to be asked about on the Day
of Judgment is what
is our prayer? This absolutely, is the most important goal that we
should have every single day. Right? Beyond everything else that
we're doing. If we're and as most of us are, I'm sure we all wear
different hats, right? We're wives were daughters, we're sisters.
We're mothers, we wear many different hats, and we ended up
doing a lot and we are juggling a lot. We have a lot of
responsibilities, right? Some people are very good about keeping
their responsibilities in order. They like to do lists. How many of
you have to do lists every day? You work from a to do list? Right?
Mashallah. So you keep yourself organized, which is very good. So
people are just on autopilot, right? It's just like, I don't
know what's going on. But I know I got things to do. You know, and
you're racing back and forth. You know, that's a lot of us are like
that. We're on little sleep, right? We're barely getting enough
rest and nutrients, but we're just going you know,
but you know, the the dunya is always pushing us to meet, you
know, all of those worldly goals that we have, and they're
important. Nobody's
denying taking care of your family taking care of responsibilities
working, whatever it is that we're doing, those are all important.
But the goal of every single one of us here should be to make
certain that whatever is happening in our lives, that it does not
interfere with our prayer. Because it is the
reason why we are created. None of this other stuff matters to us,
that have created us for one reason, and one reason only, which
is to worship Him. So if we're not,
you know, doing well in our prayers, that's the first thing
you want to look at, if you're not finding yourself satisfied in your
life, if there's things that are happening.
You know, you have a lot of problems, tribulations, hardships,
you want to look at your prayer, you want to evaluate from that
standpoint, like how committed Am I to my prayers? Am I kind of just
not really there half heartedly doing it? Am I not doing it at
all? Am I missing prayers, you know, but look at that, because I
you know, first first for sure, if you're having any, as I said
issues in life, a lot of times they can be, you know, connected
to, to the prayer. So, you know, as I said in the beginning, you
know, this time of the year, this is what, you know, people are
doing everywhere all around us. And but we should be doing this
every day. And that's the very first thing that we should be
looking at. But I wanted to talk about this concept of you know,
of happiness, because that's, you know, what, so many of us are, are
striving for, right? We're all striving to be happy one way or
another.
That can come from our relationships, it can come from
financial pursuits, or career pursuits, whatever. But we're all
we all want this concept of happiness. And so we have to stop
and ask ourselves, whose definition of happiness? Are we?
Are we committed to? Right?
Because if you look at we talked about this yesterday, I had a
session here, some of the people in the room were here yesterday,
too. But we looked at this, you know, idea of happiness. And it's
interesting, because research shows that the more people you
know, strive for happiness, and we're talking, you know, this is,
you know, research done by, by scientists, so it's not Muslims
that are doing this necessarily, but they found that the more
people pursue or tried to pursue happiness, something interesting
happens, what do you think it is?
They become unhappy.
So, as we are pushed in this direction of wanting to be happy,
researchers find that if that's your focus of this, you know, you
know, word happiness, and that's all you care about. And you're,
you know, what happens to most people's, they start isolating
other people in their lives, because the way that our world
defines happiness is a very selfish, self centered pursuit.
Right? It's all about me, me, me. It's all about what I want. And so
natural, naturally, what happens is if you start getting in that
frame of mind, you're going to alienate the people in your lives,
you're not going to feel a fulfillment from whatever it is
you're pursuing. And so you end up seeing that, as people make that
their number one pursuit, they actually end up with low, you
know, sad life satisfaction. So that's interesting, right? Because
it's like, how can that happen? Well, it's again, because what is
your definition of happiness, if it's to gain to have material
wealth, to gain things, to acquire things to acquire power to acquire
relationships, you're likely going to go down that route. But that's
not the purpose of our creation, right, as we said, our Allah's
power that created us for one purpose and one purpose only,
which is to worship Him. And if you look at our entire faith,
every single aspect of our faith is to actually give us the most
fulfillment that we can possibly have in this dunya. Right,
everything. That's why our faith is not just a belief system, it's
a way of life. If we actually commit to following our faith the
way we should be, by following the example of the prophets I said,
I'm the byproduct of that the natural consequence of that is
that we will have the true meaning of happiness, right? Which is what
because there's happiness that's fleeting, and it's just an
emotion. But true happiness is what
is what?
And that's my own. Exactly. The true meaning of happiness is
riddled with Allah subhanaw taala. Right?
To have so much peace in your heart, that the whole nothing
fazes you in this dunya That is actual happiness. Everything else
that is sold to us on a daily basis is a lie.
It's an absolute lie, right? It's a lie, that money will buy you
happiness, it's a lie, that beauty will make you happy. It's a lie
that even your relationships are going to fulfill you. That's not
true. Yes.
Please, you
never mentioned the word happy.
Right?
He only said, I met with Xena.
But he never said it is the happiness of booty exactly, is
only mentioned one side, which is related to the heart with Allah.
Does that give
it the second freedom of Islam, if we don't do it, which had
a glass of water is the only two things that anyone anyone is
mentioned as he is. Or he is a morning, he can go to lamda by
doing this to the whole data
set
and had
a lot of obligations which is uniquely healthy, right. And I
will pull the other conditions. Only these two, which is the
pillar of Islam.
Salah is that you are going to
just like go ahead and beautiful 100 Absolutely everything she said
somehow.
But you know, we're still we were sold this idea again that and it's
not just from the society around us, many of our culture's our
family members, they tell us this from a very young age, get this
you'll be happy, everything will be fine, everything will be
perfect. And a lot of times we realize, you know, that's not what
happens and you end up having tribulation and problems and
difficulties and challenges. And what happens you know, this is
where shaitan just jumps right in, right? Because you thought if I
you know, I know, for example, many sisters will come to me and
say,
I made us the hot you know, and I married someone and I did
everything right? It was hella *. Why am I so miserable, like
my marriage is not good. I'm not happy, because they were told that
if they do everything by script, and if they make us the Hatha,
it's like a magic potion and everything will be fine. This is
not true, right? So sometimes it can be even, you know, from our
cultural or religious, you know, people in our lives might distort
reality, but we have to accept that this dunya is not a place
where we should put an expectation of happiness, it's not happiness
is an emotion, it's going to come at times, like when you have the
birth of your first child and shot them or, you know, yes, on your
wedding night Inshallah, most all of us hopefully are or were happy.
There are times where happiness can come to your heart. But if you
ever believe that you're going to be just fulfilled always, and have
this constant satisfaction in life and nothing is ever going to come
and, you know, affect you negatively. This is where you set
yourself up for a lot of disappointment. But what we're
seeing is that, you know, this is what's happening, so many people
are not really clear on exactly what is, you know, what, what our
purposes here, and what the relationship that we should have
with the lowest point that it is, so they ended up you know, it's
like I get really close to Allah when things are going good, right?
Or when I have a need, like when I'm suddenly desperate you know,
stuff like you get a call from your doctor and there's a
diagnosis you know, potential diagnosis that you're you know,
like the blood tests are coming in it could be you know, something
terrible now all of a sudden everybody you know, prayers go up
and phone calls are being made and can you do a HUD them this? And we
it's like, we have this very, you know, interesting idea of what our
relationship is with Allah like he's just on call when we need
him. Right? It's not from law. And that's not how it works. We're
here only because it's a blessing from him and a gift from him.
Existence. But the the real purpose and this is where we have
to
It really comes back to our understanding the real purpose of
our creation SubhanAllah. And this is where we have to be so grateful
to Allah and so that we have an opportunity to strive for eternal
happiness. That is the purpose of our existence, Allah created us,
he has no need for any of us, He does not need anything from any of
us. So there's no nothing for him in this. It's entirely for us.
So when we think about the pursuit of happiness, that literally is
existence and following our deen that if that if you really want to
be happy, that's how you have to convince your mind the only way
that I will have a true understanding or a true experience
of happiness. Instead of I commit myself to this deen and I follow
it with that, you know, that full intention and full heart, because
anything else is, you know, you're gonna not have satisfaction in
life, you're gonna, you know, fall prey to so many traps of shade
Dawn, because that's what he does. He's our, he's the greatest enemy,
right? And so his purpose is to take away our faith, little by
little right, step by step, and he'll work on us, every single one
of us, he'll find those weak spots, those blind spots that we
have, and he'll start chipping away at us. So that's why we have
to step back and say, you know, what can I do to protect myself
from his traps? And again, the answer goes back to your faith,
the prophesy centum, if you look at his entire existence, he didn't
leave us without a solution for really anything. From the
beginning of his of the day, we have to honor that we say,
throughout every single moment, there are reminders, there are
remembrances, there are actions that we should take to protect
ourselves. That's why like a rod like this is so important. Because
there's protective guards in here, you know, there's guys in here
that will protect us. But he didn't leave us without, you know,
some means of achieving protection and happiness and safety and
security. All of it was given to us, he completed his message very
generously. No other faith is as comprehensive as Islam, you will
not find in any other tradition, what we have, we have an
incredible gift in our deen and an incredible gift in the in the
example of the prophesy centum. Because as I said, from the
beginning of the day, when your eyes open, we know what to say, we
know what to do. Our very first movement out of bed, you know, you
go to the restroom, you have a DA, you come out of the restroom, you
have a DA, you know, you put on your clothes, there's a lot to be
said, you go to prepare your breakfast. You say the HA you eat
your breakfast, you say that you finish it, it's like Subhanallah
every single point of your day. He's given us, you know, things
that we are supposed to be doing for ourselves. It's not, you know,
for any other reason he didn't need to do those. He was already
spiraling. He already had visions of his, you know, place in Jannah.
He knew where he was going. It was guaranteed to him. He was even
given an opportunity to leave and just go, but he remained because
he wanted to give continue to give to us. So now we have to ask
ourselves so here i Here we are 2020.
New Year. How much of his sunnah? Are we really putting into
practice? Like think about it?
How much of his sunnah? Are we really putting into practice? Do
you know all the laws? Your daily dawns? Why not?
Isn't that sad? How can we face him on the day of judgment? I
think about that all the time?
How can we face him?
And he did so much for us, he would wake up in the middle of the
night weeping for us. And we didn't even bother to memorize the
laws that he gave for us. But I bet you all of us know lyrics to
songs.
Right?
We have a lot of things memorized, that we don't need that benefit
us. They don't benefit us at all.
We committed to do those things.
But yet Subhanallah what the listener has given us it's like we
don't see the value of it.
We don't see the value of it. And that's tragic, right.
And then we wonder
why we're not happy in our lives. That's the paradox. Like, isn't it
obvious? You're not happy? Because the very means of attaining
happiness in this dunya that Allah designed to be a place of
tribulation to be a place of difficulty to be open.
Is of turmoil and sadness, every single thing that he gave us to
protect us from being harmed by the dunya, we're not doing. And
then we wonder why we're feeling the effects of the harms of the
dunya.
Right? Logically, there's a clear disconnect there. And we have to
go back and ask ourselves, well, that's what it is if I'm not
fulfilled in my marriage.
And yet, there are people, for example, ESEA, right. Let's look
at the women before us. They were sent us as examples. She's the
wife of Iran, who was her husband.
He was the greatest tyrant in existence. So
He massacred people. He was a horrible, wretched human being,
how is a wife of that men are able to attain the status of being one
of the four perfect women? How if it wasn't for almost subhanaw
taala, and her commitment to her Lord, right, you can be married to
someone in a relationship that's toxic, but still be protected.
From that, you know, and that's what Islam is. Islam is the
refuge, Islam is the eye of the storm, the hub, right? When you're
practicing it correctly, it will shield you from all of the fitna
of the dunya. And help your heart so that you're not fazed. And
that's why there are people who come from really difficult places
in the world, where they all they saw was bloodshed, they've seen
the, you know, horrific the horrors of war, and just, you
know, oppression and things that we can't even fathom. But
Subhanallah if you meet them, they have a smile on their face.
You know, how is that possible? If you've come from that type of a
background?
Right, that you're not affected with PTSD?
When so many other people crumble at certain traumas, right? And
it's, it's just the nature of dunya. PTSD is real, there are
people who suffer from it and I'm not, you know, I'm just saying
that there are people who can be in situations of horror, but they
can come out,
you know, almost like unscathed. Like they walk through the fire,
and nothing's happened to them, how? It's because of their, so
then why they come.
Okay, so we're gonna go ahead and continue the discussion. Right
before, right before you left, I was just sharing a story about my
teacher. But my point in sharing that was to say that there are
people who have found
the secret, right, they have been given this immunity from Allah
subhanaw taala. That enables them to withstand a lot of difficulty
and challenges in this world that some of us have never been through
the loss of a child, the loss of a spouse, real, you know, calamities
and tribulations physical health issues. How do these people do it?
It's because they have found again, what we all we all have
access to witches. They're committed to their Deen they
actually are following it the way they should be. They take their
prayer seriously. They take following the prompts. I send them
sunnah seriously. They, you know, they do remembrance of Allah, they
read their Quran, they do their silhouette, they do their daily of
cod, their do is they try to keep a state of will do. They have good
relations with people, they serve their parents and their family.
They fulfill their rights and obligations. They honor the
elderly. So how are they going?
To see you?
So this is you know, it's it's all there. Everything's in our deen
and the prophesize systems entire life is so that we can model it.
So that's why we have to say it is absolutely possible to find
contentment in this dunya despite problems, tribulations, hardships,
that are inevitable, we will suffer we will have loss, we will
have grief, people will betray us it's just part of life it's going
to happen. But how do you again build an immunity so that it
doesn't break you down? So where the where you're depressed all the
time, you're miserable. You're, you know, you're taking medication
You are medicating self medicating with other things that you
shouldn't be doing.
You just look again to our tradition. So that was just that
was the I just wanted to finish that point. Now, what you have on
the on or whatever, and on the board here is something I wanted
to share with you because I really think lists are helpful when you
have something to, to recall easily it can, it can help stick,
you know, has that sticky factor. So I like lists. And if you study,
you know, life satisfaction, it's very much tied to, again, so you
know, an individual's definition of happiness. So that's why when
you look at people who have low self esteem, one of the first
qualities that they possess is this feeling of unhappiness,
right. And so you want to think about that if you are in a place
in your life, where you're just not feeling good about yourself,
for whatever reason, it's it personal is it, you know, your
relationships, or their problems you're dealing with it you don't
know how to manage and cope with, do you have health problems, or
could be a variety of reasons. But if it's leading you to this
conclusion, where you're just not feeling good about yourself, you
might want to, again, reevaluate where your what your definition is
of, or what your expectations are of this dunya. Because if you can
accept that this is a place of difficulty and challenges, but I
can find a refuge, and that's where I need to put my focus, then
inshallah you can slowly come out of that. But just to, you know, I
wanted you to see it for comparison, right? People who
have, again, low self esteem, they not only feel unhappy, but they
also have anxiety, they have, you know, inferiority, superiority,
complex issues, and they're impatient. Their goals are always
about other people. There's no internal, like desire to become
better, it's always about making other people happy, or trying to
get validation from other people approval of other people. It's a
very external thing. And then negative, just in a constant state
of negativity, right.
All of that all of those qualities are indicative of someone who has
is having, you know, there's a spiritual disconnect. Because if
you are, again, following your religion, your faith the way that
you should, and following the example the prophets I sent him,
it is to protect you from all of the things on the left, literally,
everything in Islam, is to protect you from the things on the left,
right.
Because if you follow your your faith, as we've been saying, it
will encourage all the other qualities and we'll talk about
now, the second list there.
People with high self esteem, look at the qualities that they
possess. The first one is so telling, you're responsible.
Right? If a person has high self esteem, they take things
seriously. They take their responsibilities seriously. And
this is one of the first, you know, objectives of the primary
objectives of our dean is to make us responsible people. We have
goals every single day that we should be achieving. Our prayers
are daily. It's not that Oh, you just saying once and then you're
set. You know, you have to commit. You have to take your will do your
prayers. Seriously. And make your world revolve around your prayers,
not the other way around. Where you're just like, oh, yeah, oh,
yeah, I have to pray. But you're doing other things. You're
shopping, you're going you know, to the movies, you're listening to
music, you're watching Netflix, and then it's like, oh, yeah, I
have to pray. No, it should be. I have to pray. And I'm going to
schedule everything else around my prayers. So if I have to, you
know, go to this event, Well, where am I going to pray? That's
how your mind should be. You know, that's how it should work. Where
it's always the forefront of your mind. Is your iba to Allah subhana
wa Tada. Right. So responsibility is the is a characteristic of
someone who is again, they have esteem, they know their purpose,
they know why they were created. And this is what we're all
striving for, isn't it? Don't we all want to have high self esteem
everybody in this room? Right everybody? We all wish we were
confident, you know, high achieving, high, you know,
producing self high self esteem people. Well, let's look at what
it takes to get there. You have to be a person committed and that's
why number two is connected to that goal commitment. You have to
have goals. Right? You have to look at your your life and not
look at it like it's a done deal. It is what it is. This is my
Life and, you know, that's all shaved down if shave, Dan's got
you in a place where you're just complacent wherever you are. And
you think like, I'm just destined to be a housewife, I just cook and
clean all day long. And I, you know, clean up after the kids and
my husband, I have no other internal goal of my own. This is
unhealthy, and it's not, this isn't what our tradition teaches.
Women, we're multifaceted. We're, we're more than just mothers and
wives. Our first role is servants of Allah subhana wa, tada. That's
our very primary. You know, that's who we are. First, all of the
other things come secondary. But if you don't see that as a part of
who you are, but the domestic and material roles that you play all,
you know, define you, and you don't think about, well, how can I
learn better? How can I become more? A better servant of God?
What do I need to learn,
we should all know are far behind. You know, and many people in our
community they don't know they're far behind. It's not because there
isn't access to knowledge. You're we're in a community center that
mashallah has programs constantly. There. We are the envy of people
all across the world. I'm telling you, there are people who envy
this community, because they our center is so active, and they wish
they had a place like this, where they have scholars coming and
teaching all the time. So if you don't know your thought behind,
which are what what are your frontline, which was one of the
primary things that every, every person should know, every Muslim
should know?
What are we responsible to know?
We're responsible to know, our fifth of what bajada, right, you
should know how to clean yourself, right? There's certain things
about, you know, knowledge that everybody should know, you
shouldn't have that knowledge, your prayers, right, should know
how to pray,
you should know how to read the book of Allah subhanaw taala.
Everybody in this room, we should all at this age in our lives, we
should all know that we we should have studied that. Right? Even a
little bizarrely considered, studying the diseases of the
heart, also afforded by mine.
So if you've never studied the diseases of the heart,
I'm not I mean, I have I have to make a plug. Now I have a class
tomorrow, you are welcome to come and join. We're starting a six
week class based on the book purification of the heart. This is
the book,
if you've never studied it, or read the book, this is by one of
our greatest scholars of all time, you might know they considered
also something every Muslim should know. You should know what plagues
the spiritual heart, so that you protect yourself from it. But
again, these are sciences and these are disciplines that we have
to take seriously. So you know, wherever you are, in your
spiritual path, you want to ask yourself, I need to always be
looking to grow. So wherever I am, I need to find the next step. Like
if I haven't done my FIP I need to do that. So if I haven't, you
know, but kind of just start putting down those goals. That's
the better, you know, New Year's resolution, then thinking about
how many pounds you want to lose, you know, or, you know, cleaning
out your closets like, people get stuck on these ridiculous trends,
because it's popular and everybody's Instagram is blowing
up and social media is talking about these things. And it's like,
cool, but all of that is means nothing if you don't have your
your these things in order from a spiritual place, right? Yes.
Okay
with the year,
right, let's just remind. So this is still new, it doesn't mean that
everything she's pointing out on the board, or saying is something
you need to know like to write
for this month. And if it's something like you're saying
something you don't understand, please ask questions. We prefer
the word that she doesn't she say right now, please ask or write it
down and ask later. This is not something you have to know is not
something you'd have to have that list because I know that we have a
few comments in there. And I know there's a few eyes in here that
are
no thank you for mentioning that.
No, just like off headed, I appreciate that because I want I,
you know, I don't come to this group often. So I appreciate you
mentioning that. Yeah.
Of course, and we have to pace ourselves and I'm speaking really
to the people who have, it's not even a matter of, of convert or
not, it's a matter of your mindset. So you could be, you
know, in this, you know, faith for 20 years or one year doesn't
matter. But if your mindset tells you, you're good, where you are,
that's what I'm challenging, right? Because we all need to be
looking at ourselves as works in progress. And that's why Goal
Setting goals is very important. And again, it's, you know, it's
clear that our dean is pushes us constantly to be better, right?
There's no part of our dean that says, oh, once you've arrived at
this level of knowledge, it's good, you're good, you know, just
know, you have, you know, the Masters in our history, who were
always mashallah, even though they had achieved incredible feats, you
know, memorizing the Quran when they were young, or all six
volumes of the Hadith, or, you know, mastering the science or
that science. They were also guess what mathematicians and medical
physicians, and you know, they studied law, and they were
philosophers, and it was never just enough, they kept wanting to
grow and cultivate themselves into being the best versions of
themselves. I think modern, you know, the message, unfortunately,
is that, you know, once you kind of arrive at a certain point, you,
especially in some of our cultures, I think there's a
hierarchy or a priority that's off. It's like everything about
your family. First, you got to cook meals every single day, and
you have to vacuum the house every day. And, you know, and it's like,
what all those domestic things are great, but if they're hindering
your spiritual growth, that's not that's not great. Your
spirituality is very important part of you don't deny yourself
those things. Don't deny yourself martial, I just had a sister come
up to me during the break. And I was very proud of her, you know,
she, she was, she was kind of excited because she said she has
six children, Mashallah. And she spent so many years, dropping her
kids off and not being able to participate in Mr. Activities,
because she had babies to attend to. And now she's here and she's,
you know, attends programs, and she's so enthusiastic. I'm very
proud to see that Michelle, because she didn't forget herself.
She didn't, she's fulfilling her obligations as a mother, but she's
also prioritizing that, you know, what, it's my time, and we should
do that we should all do that we should all you know, feel. It's
that it's that all of us have had that is always calling on us. And
we have to find ways to, to respond, you know, like the
Hadith, you know, where he says, I, you know, extend your hand, and
I'll extend my arm walk to me and I'll run this hadith could see,
it's beautiful. But where are we? Are we extending our hand even? Or
have we just, you know, shut down. Or we're just busy reading books,
you know, fictional fantasy books. I see. All these people caught up
and stuff. I'm like, how, you know, you have time to do that
type of their Kindles, you know, they got all these books that they
can't wait to read. But then they've never bothered to, to
study, you know, the sciences that are going to actually, as we said,
protect you. In the end. If you study the diseases of the heart,
you will find yourself becoming a better human being. I mean, why
would that not be a priority on your list to do you know, watching
YouTube videos of influencers and tutorials about how to be perfect
and Marie Kondo and organizing your life it's like we waste our
time with all of that. And here we have our beautiful Dean that's
given everything that says you want to be a good hitter you want
to be the best human beings that you can possibly be. Here it is.
It's not hard and it'll all come into place because look, even like
you know, I joke about it but like when you go shift to the next
wine, you know, the hara SN Marie Kondo has nothing on a Muslim
who's actually following their rules, their their tradition,
because as I said, doing things on the Sun is perfection. So if you
want to organize your life, just follow the example of your, you
know, of our tradition, which teaches you to do to be clean, and
to take, you know, organizing and doing things meticulously, as I
said, it's pawn.
Seriously, that's Islam. Islam teaches us that we
don't need these gurus to teach us things. You know, we don't need to
look to people in modern life as being, you know, like that we
strive for their way, when our tradition already teaches us those
things. That's what's that's what's sad. So, you know, again
going back to this, the second one is sorry.
You want to be a person who's achieved success and has high self
esteem. Just look it's all Islam. genuineness being a truthful,
honest person. This was the problems I said Masada but I mean,
he was the most truthful, the most trustworthy. just shot it just a
transparent, true person. Not doesn't have you know, two faces
doesn't lie to you. And then you know, behind your back say this
about you stuff a lot. That's all you know, it's all part of modern
life. But Islam teaches you how to be a genuine person fear Allah. So
what it is, you fear Allah, you're not going to talk about people. If
you truly fear Allah, you're not gonna make Liba about people and,
and think bad harbor bad feelings and have rancor in your heart
because you fear Allah, it's genuinely like, it's there. But
all of that is typography forgiveness, being a more
forgiving person. This is, again, so much a part of our tradition,
how many Hadith how many eyes in the Quran, where Allah Subhana
Allah is teaching us to be merciful and compassionate, and to
forgive those who have wronged us. Even if you have, you know, if
you're in the right, it's better for you. Because when you're more
forgiving, you will get what the forgiveness of Allah subhanaw
taala. Right. When you're more compassionate with people, you
will get the compassion of Allah and mercy of Allah, all of this,
our tradition teaches us, right, internal values.
What are we talking about this is this whole discussion is about
having that, you know, conscience that constantly tells you, you
know, to be better, to strive to be better, all of those values
that are coming from your own self, you don't need someone else
to tell you what to do, because you know, your purpose, almost,
you know, that almost kind of created you for a reason. All of
that, again, is reinforced constantly in our faith, you read
the Quran, it's constantly told to us what our purpose is why we were
created, and to strive for certain goals, but all of that is, is
again within our tradition, positivity, just being a good
person, smiling, you know, meeting people with with cheerfulness,
this is all if you read the descriptions of the prophets, I
send them read them read read them from the Shemitah or from from the
Shiva read how he was with people. He greeted people always with a
cheerful disposition, smiling, happy to see people, exuding
positivity, you know, spreading the salam smile, all of that is
his sunnah. So again, you know, we, we wonder, like I said, why
we're not fulfilled, and why we're not happy. But the answers are
right in front of us.
If only we took our faith more seriously, and if only we realize
its value, that it actually isn't just a strict set of rules, and,
you know, things that we have to follow it is literally the formula
of achieving satisfaction in this world. And protecting yourself
from harm. That is Islam, right. And the last one, self
improvement, again, constantly seeing yourself as someone who
needs improvement, and you know, your work in progress. So those
are the qualities of someone who's, who has, you know, a high
sense of self worth, we can all achieve that. And it's important
to again, see the contrast because a lot of people are stuck on the
left.
They're stuck on all on one or two, or maybe all of those areas.
Trust me like this is a it's a problem in the world. Now. It's
not even just our community. Everybody's you know, feeling
these low, like lows, you know, they're just not feeling happy in
life, low reports of, you know, satisfaction with whatever their
job they're not happy with their relationships or children or
spouses, their homes, their cars, their clothing, it's like, there's
no happiness. Well, you know, we have to question why that is.
You know, and how can we protect ourselves because when you look at
the happiest people on the planet, the research is also interesting.
Some of them have nothing.
Right? Some of the happiest most content people are people who are
not materialistically wealthy, they don't have a lot but
Subhanallah you see them you know, I just came from Umrah. You know
about
out a month or so ago, you see people mashallah they are visibly
poor, you can tell their clothing to have you know, dirt on their
faces and their fingernails, they just, they probably have a very
difficult life. But Subhanallah they are smiling, you know, your
to your greeting, we had people coming up to us offering us dates
and bread and candy, like just randomly, you know, but if you
look at them, they don't look like they have a lot. But they're so
Subhanallah just happy, because all of us part that has given them
a lot. And that is why the only source of true happiness is from
Alaska. So you can go and try to find it everywhere else. If you
think those are the things that are giving you happiness, but
they're not going to if you overlook, Allah, it's just not
going to happen, you will not find contentment. So the only sources a
lot, everything else is just, you know, again, a gift from him a
blessing from him. A means, you know, but it's not the source, the
source is him. So
this last, you know, list there I wanted to share
are qualities that we should all be striving for. Because if we
want, you know, true happiness, we also have to realize it's on us.
We have to do our part. We can't just expect it to fall in our
laps. Yes.
Yes.
That's a good question, fear and hope. Um, well, you know, from an
Islamic perspective, that's the word girl. So you know, that's,
you know, I'm sorry, that's tough. Well, excuse me, that's tough. So
the top one is fear and hope. And that is absolutely a sign of
someone who's got you know, high self esteem because if you have
Taqwa of Allah subhanaw taala. You don't, you know, you don't get too
ahead of yourself where you think, you know, everything you're doing
is perfect. And you're you've got a made, that's where the fear
element, you know, keeps you humble. Right? It keeps you humble
that you know what know at any point, Allah can take me. And
that's why we make dua for a good ending, because we don't know, you
know, you could be praying right now, and believing in this moment,
but God forbid, you do something. And there's Hadith that mentioned
all of this, you know, that, that there, a person can be doing a lot
of good, but then they do one thing. And that's what actually
ends up leading to their demise. So fear is to keep us humble, and
then hope is to also protect us from despair. Because people who
are hopeless, you know, and in despair, this is a weak state of
Eman because this, our dean is not a dean of hopelessness. Our dean
is a dean of absolute hope. And that's why we have phenomenal
stories that are trying to get that message through to us like
the man who killed 99 people. I mean, there's no other other story
that I can think of right now, that should give anybody hope.
More than that story. If you don't know that story, look it up. It's
a story about a man who literally is a mass murderer, he murdered 99
people, but he wanted to redeem himself and basically become a
better person. And Allah subhana gives him hope. And it's a
beautiful story, I don't want to ruin it for you, but look it up.
Because that's the kind of story that wherever you are, should make
you feel like, you know,
things will get better. And I just have to believe
it could possibly, I mean, I don't want to assume that everybody
who's anxious has necessarily, you know, we shouldn't make
assumptions. But anxiety is something we should seek
protection from, you know, the province of Saddam, there's laws
where he's actually asking Allah to, you know, protect us from
anxiety. So it's something that can plague you, and you know,
affect your heart. And it might chip away at your quality of life,
you know, there are people who have, you know, real disorders
that are, you know, very serious, and it definitely affects their
quality of life. So, I think, you know, and then there's other
people who can manage, but I think, you know, those are all,
you know, they're gonna they're subjective. So it's hard to really
say, but at the end of the day, when you want to see, you know,
what is our someone
so sweet, you, you have something to say.
But at the end of the day, you know, if you want to see where do
you want to be, you want to be free from all of that, right? So
how can I be free from all of those things? Well, that's what
that last list is for. It's to tell us. Well, let's look at the
qualities that we need to inculcate in order to gain the
love of Allah subhanaw taala right. The first one is Toba. So
Wherever you are all of us, we should be making Toba constantly.
And you know, saying a stock photo, you know, 100 times 70
times, however many times a day you should we should be doing that
as a matter of practice. After every Salah you should be
conscious of the fact that you sin, we sin every day, nobody is
free of sin. We all sinned today. We all did something we shouldn't
have done, either with intent, which may Allah really forgive us
if we did something harm harmful with intent, or we didn't do
something we should have done. And maybe there was no intent, it was
just negligence. But either way, we have to accept that you can't
you know, that we're held accountable for those things. You
know, if you're, like I said, watching a show, and then you miss
your prayer, you're gonna be held accountable for that as a fact.
Right.
So there's certain things you just have to you know, keep real. Yes,
you have a question or a comment?
Sure, I'm gonna translate every single one of them. Thank you so
much. The first one is Toba and Toba means repentance. So
repenting for the you know, whatever you've done, which is
what we just mentioned, right? If you've made any mistakes today,
just make Toba and remember Allah subhanaw taala. You know, he loves
this is really, again, something you should just stick in your
mind. Allah loves the web, more than the perfect servant. Okay,
I'll say it again. He loves the one who sins but keeps coming back
for Toba. And not to say you're making the same sin and you keep
thinking like, Oh, I'm just gonna, you know, no, you don't. It's a
matter of like, I keep slipping and falling and I'm weak and I you
know, but Allah, I know that you're the most forgiving. You
have this hope that you're constantly, you know, manifesting
by returning to him, you are more beloved to Allah in that state
than if you were to just do everything perfectly. We have to
know these things. So the to repent. It might sound like, Oh,
it's this negative thing, but it's not. It's actually a beautiful
thing to make Toba?
It's a beautiful recognition of Allah subhanaw taala would like
your obedience, right? That you are a servant to tell him, you're
recognizing his lordship over you. And that's why you make Toba.
Right? So it's a beautiful thing. Don't make it like this shame
thing. Internal shame, by the way is good. You know? Nobody needs to
know your sins. You don't need to go around broadcasting what you've
done. Know it's between you and Allah azza wa jal. I'm so sorry.
Sorry, I did this again. But you're so forgiving. Please
forgive me. You know, that's that's what you do.
And you just have hope, and you inshallah work on yourself, right.
And that's why the prophets have said, Every son of Adam sins in
the Best of those who sin are those who repent. So the best of
of, of all of us are the people who make Toba
and many other many other Hadith.
This one actually is a really good one. Allah is more pleased with
the repentance of his slave than a person who has his camel in a
desert carrying all of his food and drink and it is lost. Having
lost all hope to get that back. This person lies down in the shade
and it's disappointed and heartbroken about his camel. When
all of a sudden he finds out that the camel is standing before him.
He takes hold of its reins and then out of boundless joy blurts
out, Oh Allah, you're my slave, and I am your job. He commits this
mistake out of extreme joy, right. But the point of this hadith is
like he's more pleased with Toba with our Toba than such a person.
And we all have been there, we've all lost something, right? And
we've like, Oh, my God, and then you know, when you find it, that
joy, right? Like the joy that you feel after losing something that
you thought you lost? Like, what is your engagement ring, wedding
ring? Or like, whatever it is some valuable thing that you find it?
You know, but it's more or less one is more pleased with with us.
What do we make Toba than the not feeling that we have? Right? So
just think about that. It's all to encourage us bajada The next word
is purification.
We have to keep ourselves clean. And this is why going back to what
I said earlier, you know further iron, which is compulsory
knowledge. It's what every single Muslim should know. There are
certain things that we should know one of them is to know how to
clean yourself, because it's such a big part of being Muslim, that
we maintain a level of cleanliness right and not just for ourselves
in our bodies, but in our spaces and
Yes, even in public spaces, we should be practicing cleanliness.
When you go to a restaurant, or anywhere, even a hotel, like why
do you need to use five towels? Just because they're they're,
like, juicy. That's like, right? Why? Why do that? Why throw your
garbage? Like everywhere? You know, sometimes they have a can by
the table, there's a garbage can in the bathroom. Like, we have to
think about these things. Why am I a messy person in someone else's
space? Just because there's people that are going to clean up after
me. This isn't that's not right. A good person is conscious of these
things, right? Like, I don't want to, you know, I want to have a
small like, leave a small footprint when I go somewhere,
right? The believers are what those who are tread lightly on the
earth, you shouldn't be you see people, all the biller, they
destroy hotel rooms, like I don't get that at all. Be like, you
know, minimal, like, you know, you know, don't make such a big giant
mess for people. Or you see people and I've seen restaurants or
muscles do this
whole family, and it's just junk all over the table and they just
walk out.
That's horrible.
Is that I mean, how would we do that? Really? Like if someone did
that to us? How would we feel like they came we invited them to eat
and they just thrashed the table. Bones chicken bones everywhere
soft spilled?
It's just like somebody they leave. Like who does that? Nobody
does that. Yes.
Of course, absolutely. This is a Seraph.
Oh, yeah.
Exactly.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
Oh, yeah.
Yes.
Yeah, no, it's heartbreaking stuff for a lot. This is It's weddings,
conferences. Everywhere you go. Even we just you know, we did on
row we slide there. May Allah forgive us, there's a lot of isn't
off and set off is when you are, you know, you overindulge. And
then you, you do that, you know, you you're wasteful. So we have
to, you know, seek refuge from Allah, because these are all
things that if you're following again, this is one of the problems
I said, if you don't do those things, because you have a
conscience that tells you that's wrong. It's wrong to throw away.
Like, if you eat I agree, I've seen it like, you know, a sandwich
and someone will have a bite of their sandwich. And they just
throw it away, or half of the salary, cut, cut, just take a
knife, cut off the portion. Right? And like you said, if you go step
outside, you might be able to, you know, give it to someone who's in
need, or, you know, save it for lunch the next day, but like, you
don't need to just toss it. So yes.
Yes, absolutely.
Yep.
Exactly. And nobody does that at home, right? We're like, over the
faucet with
the waters too much right? With our kids with everybody else.
We're very conscious about our own spending, because we're gonna have
to pay that bill. You know, but we do this is all a part of, you
know, your, you have to ask yourself, like, Allah is watching
you at all times. How do you, you know, do that in good conscience?
And it should, you know, but again, if you're not thinking
about these things, and it's just like, everybody else is doing it,
it's okay, I'll do it. And I'm just saying, I'm gonna go along,
then, you know, where is that, you know, internal values, you know,
number five, where you you have your own set of rules that you
live by, that's what Islam should teach you. So the Hatha is very
big, you know, and this is also important, the key the Prophet, I
sort of said that the key to the prayer is cleanliness. It's
beginning his thick beard, and it's ending his sunnah. Our
prayer, you know, will do is very important. It's an act of worship,
we have to take will do seriously. We try to be as mindful as
possible and if we're just, you know, splashing water and having
showers in the in the sink, and going through it really quickly,
just because we have to go rush, rush, rush. That's a time
management problem. You shouldn't be rushing. Your will do because
you're likely to get a rush to your prayer. And if you're rushing
you're
When you're rushing your prayer, what are you spending your time
on? Right? Because not everything's getting rushed. And
that's where you have to sit back and go. Yeah, I took, you know, a
long time doing XYZ activity. And it was, you know, I shopped around
and went to the store in that store. But then I rushed all those
things like where are my priorities right? Maybe I didn't
manage my time well enough. So this is where this Maha Sabha this
constant conversation comes back where you look at yourself and I
need to be better, right? So the next one is taqwa. Okay? And this
is you know, pity it's having that balance of fear and hope and a
loss panda but always remembering that he is with you at all times.
And that is what motivates you to be the best person that you can
be. The prophets I sent him said, or I've heard actually narrative
that the Messenger of Allah was once asked by someone which people
were admitted into paradise the most. And he said, the people of
Taqwa and good character they go hand in hand. Okay. If you have
Taqwa of Allah subhanaw taala you will have good character and this
is the predominance of people in general this is the qualities that
they will have right and then he was also asked him the same Hadith
about people who are admitted into the fire the most and he said
those who are
those who sorry this is not translated properly
Yeah, it's referring to the people who are too loose with their mouth
and their private parts. Okay. So we know that from the Hadith these
are the people of of Jehan Nam is those who are irresponsible with
their mouth which is many things right? They talk too much they
make claims they shouldn't they lie about Allah subhana data or
they make riba they you know, they lie in general there's a lot of
bad things that you can do with your mouth and then private parts.
This is you know, again being
blind, you know, just not
promiscuous doing lewd things. This is all over our societies
now, right? We see it everywhere. But these are the people that will
make up the people of jahannam. And then he said that whoever has
stuck wherever his Lord and maintains maintains ties of
kinship, his life will be prolonged, his wealth will be
abundant and his family will love him. And the problems in Walsall
said have Taqwa of Allah, wherever you are, and following evil deed
with a good one to wipe it out and treat the people with good
behavior. So that was constantly there's so many honey, these are
just short, little, a few samples of them, but enough to get that
across. These are qualities we have to inculcate, we have to have
consciousness of Allah and, and make sure that we're acting always
with good character. Sn. Well, we talked about earlier, goodness and
perfection, you know, Allah loves those who do things and they do
things well, right. And it's actually in the process and said
that Allah has prescribed that we do things with SN in everything
that we do. So whenever we do something, that we try our best to
make it the best effort possible. We don't turn in things or produce
things that are half hearted or done with, you know, very minimal
effort. So take your time, right, you know, take your time doing
things don't rush, right I did, I'm gonna show thought when you're
rushing through something, you're likely going to make mistakes and
its quality goes down. So again, though, you know, getting into
practice of these things is how we, we gain Allah Subhana Allah is
pleasure. the Wellcome Trust in Allah, right? Allah loves those
who put their trust in him. Oh, man, I've heard that said that. He
heard I heard the Prophet, listen and say, if you all depend on
Allah, with due reliance, he would certainly give you provision as he
gives it to the birds who go forth hungry in the morning, and return
with full bellies at dusk. So just having this absolute certainty
that you know what, no matter what Allah is going to take care of me.
Like I just, you just have to believe that, that always finds
that will will, you know, will either especially if you have a
need, you know, ask for your need, but know that if it's given
withheld from you, in this dunya there's a reason for that, likely
it's not good enough for you and inshallah he will replace it with
something better or he's waiting for the next life to reward you
but either way, in every circumstance, you have to have
this deep conviction that ALLAH SubhanA always wants the best for
you and not to let dunya or circumstances make you question
In that ever, as soon as you start questioning that it's a problem,
right? That Oh, is this, you know, that you start losing your trust
in Him, that's, that's a serious issue. But this is, again,
something we all have to work on justice, you know, being a person
who's just unfair.
You know, in all of your transactions with people, just in
every situation, you're just always looking for the, to be a
fair person. This is a very important quality that we should
all inculcate inshallah.
And then the last one
is supper.
And, you know, again, there's different types of patients, but
the real patients, the problem, they sort of said, is at the
stroke at the beginning of a calamity. So when something
happens to you, that is like, like a teacher that I described, that
is the perfect example of stubborn Jimmy, right? His wife had just
died. But why was he able to show so much patience, where he could
actually go and give a class even though his her body hasn't yet
been prayed over? I mean, we just have to think what can you know,
because he had, he followed his D, he realized that was her time.
Obviously, the pain and the sorrow and all the hardships are gonna
come, you can't escape it, you know, you're gonna grieve. But
when you realize something happens, that's out of your
control, and that you didn't expect your response has to be
patience like Allah. It's your decree. And I can't you know,
fight it or be mad and angry about it. So these are all you know,
qualities again, have that almost had that loves and that we should
all strive to have. Okay, are there any questions? I know it's
you guys have to pick up your kids any questions or anything anybody
wants to add
number six other other is justice. Yeah, I'm sorry. I didn't go over.
I did some English some Arabic but yeah. Okay. Any other questions or
comments? Or just like go ahead and we'll end in the somehow to go
over him to get sure the one that was going to be right alongside it
was about I gotta say that Elmo. No, have you been on Amazon a lot.
You said Oh, my God. He was talking about sort of the
streaming theater Bismillah AR Rahman AR Rahim Allah isin inland
Santa Fe Hassan II La La Nina Manu wagon Swati had you with the
vessel will happy with the rest of the sub Zack welfare and thank you
so much.