Mindful Ramadan 2024 – Transform your Relationship with Allah

All right, spill on my lake on what I had to learn.

So I go so I come to LA her sister Holly How are we doing today? handled? Very good Masha Allah What about yourself? How is Ramadan these days hamdulillah such a blessing to have witnessed another Ramadan much I see the clock a little cloudy day behind you. Yes that was it this morning. It is we go through so many changes sometimes in one day, we go from 40 degrees to 70 degrees.

Lots of changes. So please let us know if you can hear us and see us and we're gonna get started soon. We're talking about how

you know we our relationship with all law is so so critical right transform relationship with Allah Subhan Yes, in sha Allah so when it comes to then how are you? It's good to have you why they come as salam but

that's that's that's encouraging. It is encouraging

amazing so far Mashallah. Tabata Allah, I'm really looking forward to the live lesson Alhamdulillah you can hear us and see us. Fantastic. All right. So let us know how's your Ramadan going? We'll wait for just a few more people to sign in, in sha Allah and then and then we have a really jam packed webinar. Right, brother, we're

all it'll be very inspiring. All right, thank you. Thank you. How are things going so far?

You know, what you said brother would do about you know, having another Ramadan I have never been as grateful as this year because we have experienced so many losses so many deaths, not just not just what we've witnessed like in Palestine or what's going on, but also within our community and within our family. And it just became so much more such a powerful and grateful feeling to make it to another Ramadan and hamdulillah How many of y'all agree that you're just so much more grateful for making it to this Ramadan?

What are your thoughts brother would do? Yeah, I'm looking at the chat and just seeing the chickens Yes. Is such a such an important thing to remember that. Naturally, we have a heavy heart we feel heavy this Ramadan, going into Ramadan, seeing what we have seen. May Allah may Allah have that difficulty and pain that we went through, may Allah hold that in his mercy and his or Hama inshallah is compassion. And while also having the discernment, you know, it's going to take us to another topic, how to have empathy, while you have a sense of a little distancing, where you are able to be grateful and content for where you are and what you are, but at the same time, have empathy and deep

compassion for people that are going through difficulty. So it shows up in your heart and new doors as well. Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. When we talk about da we can touch on how powerful it is and how I've witnessed so many miracles. I'm sure all of us have stories that have transformations and miracles happening when we make the dog. So

are we ready? Bismillah with salat wa salam O Allah, Allah. So how many of you know someone who let's say they pray, they pray all their prayers? Maybe they pray at all at the masjid. But then they have a habit of lying. Right?

Or maybe the end? What other examples do you have for the food?

Yeah, or, you know, their people want their family don't wait around for them to get home. Like they're scared when they when they arrive home or the stories that we hear sometimes someone prayed, but they're home yet. Yeah. And they might be even cheating you in business, maybe outwardly, they seem very religious, maybe, you know, they have her job or they have a long beard. And what ends up happening is that they either cheat you or they cheat on their spouse, or sometimes they curse their you know, their own spouse publicly.

And I, I've had examples of this, and a couple came in many years ago, and the wife was actually quite

she was quite frustrated that her husband is not as practicing doesn't, let's say do the Sunnah prayers, do his con. And then within that same session, she started cursing her husband in front of Oh boy.

Yeah, and I just said, Sister, I mean, let's just put it on the scales, not doing sunnah. Not doing a car versus cursing out your spouse in front of someone else, what's going to be heavier as far as bad deeds? Right. And so we see this discrepancy between the religious outward behavior and actually

embodying it.

Yeah. Subhanallah i Yeah, we see that in the comments that

this is one of those things that, you know,

that is so unfortunate to witness at the same time, sometimes people that are on the fence to come in to the dean and the beauty of the dean, you know, right. That is an excuse also right? To to not understand the importance and the beauty of our faith. Seeing you know, that they say, okay, how can somebody pray and do this? So I'm better person than this guy. So, yeah, yeah. Well, that's used a lot for the hit job, right? It's like, Oh, I know this job. And all she does is you know, she just does I don't know, I've seen her vape or I seen her. Maybe start some kind of rumor or, and then you're just like, Okay, well, we don't want to use that as a way of necessarily measuring people,

right. We want to use it and we want to see like, what what is missing first, maybe we can focus a little bit on Taqwa. Right? Could you tell us the verse about how the Allah that puts the VALIC museum this is given to you, you know, so that Allah Spano says that the purpose of giving you the this, this fasting, so that La La Quinta tekun, so then you can become this better version of yourself that I like them to, to become mindful and aware and conscious of Allah. And among those that you mentioned, that you can be aware of, you can't know God until you know yourself. If you don't even know if you claim to know God by showing up in that prayer, and you will completely miss

the boat on knowing what you're doing and how you're coming across. You know, in your relationships and your business and everything else where God is there with you right there with you. How did you forget God all of a sudden, did he leave you when you left a message it.

So it's such an important, you know, element of what Allah is trying to help us build. So it's that awareness tackle would be equivalent to the awareness of a law. I've heard some analogies just to make it a little bit easier.

Oh, good. I love making them because it just clarifies things is that it's kind of like having brakes, right? Brakes in the car, where you're about to get into an accident, and then you break and it protects you. So so many times in life, we find that maybe you're about to tell someone off and then you're like, or you break, or you're about to maybe do something that is haram and you hold back from doing it. So all of that can exemplify a form of Taqwa. And I think I heard another analogy Sheikh was describing that it is like when you have the the brittle on the on the horse and you the horse. Yeah, yes. And you you control where it goes. And you control the speed. Yeah, and I

have a pair is a Chinese Chinese and Zen story. You know, like this Chinese man just like going off on his horse somewhere. And so people just rushed into like, wow, you were so excited, you're going somewhere, where are you going, and then they come close to the horse. And the Chinese man points to the horse and says, Wherever my horse is taking me, I have no control where the horse

so the story is basically like that horse is like our emotions, you know, in our distractions that take us Wherever, wherever, one, two, and this is where your mind goes, at least where it comes in that the rule is supposed to be the, you know, supposed to be the right. Body supposed to be the writer, you know, like our so we're able to have that regulation and we're able to cultivate

our heart. Absolutely. You know, I have a real life story of that. I actually really, yes, yes, I do, too. I do too. Yeah.

Okay, so I think it was in college, I went horseback riding with some friends. I'm an amateur, but I'm like, Okay, I've been in Texas for 26 years. There's got to be like a hidden cow. Horse like there's there's a hidden cowgirls body. All right, so how do y'all exactly so I'm on this horse, and we're going slowly, it's beautiful day, you know, there's the crisp air, there's beautiful trees, and then suddenly my horse starts galloping. Starts galloping towards a fence. And I thought it's gonna jump. And I mean, I said my Shahada. I'm like this. This is it. I was so scared because I'm an amateur. And it stopped. It stopped right there. And the owner of the horse came and said,

Ma'am, you need to mine your horse. I go I don't know how to mine my horse, I You got to take it by the rain, and you got to show it where to go. And I thought this is a perfect analogy for our desires, our self talk, because if you just let it go, you're you're in danger. So what is your horse story? What is yeah, my horse story was was me watching. I wasn't on that horse, but it was like that horse? Oh, no, not last summer, but the year before we were in kappa dokie you know, in Turkey and go into those like this excursions on the horseback, you know, go into the chimney, like the fairy chimneys into the mountains. And so basically my brother in law and his daughter, they're

in one of the horse and that horse started acting up and they threw them off. Oh, while basically the guy that was holding the horse and my wife quickly ran off to help them and this horse my wife was one became nervous seeing all of this instead of running off into the highway. And I was just

started making dua because you know, somebody was holding my horse. I was on top of Oh, like, oh my god, so somehow, you know, lay I was able to get her legs around. And that's

true cow girl. It was it was interesting. We had to we had to be we went to the hospital with three of them, got them x ray, you know, and made sure they're okay. hamdulillah and then Hamdulillah, we're able to carry out

intense, much more intense, much more intense story much

cute she's saying your queen of analogy if.

So, you know this, this concept of Taqwa is, in a state of we're in a state of awareness where instead of with lawyer we're in state of continuously watching you know ourselves in a way that we are in a state of awareness, you know, which is also the concept of like Morocco Baba, the name which wasn't for our brand after a lot of contemplation because Marathi Baba is it comes from the word, the root, same root words, the name of Allah Rakeem, raw coffin BA, and a Rottie. Allah is the one that's in Kandahar. Luckily, Shane Workiva, Allah is always watchful over his servants. So the same way, as a human being our teachers and our scholars, like when we study, you know, because

Ali's book, for example, could tell merkaba Maha so he talks about scholars that said, you know, why should I not be in a state of vigilance and awareness of my God, if He Himself is always watching, or he's always watching over me. So we're also watching our heart in a way that can always take us not away from God, but closer to God, not away from our best self, but closer to our best. You know, as you were saying, this, I just got a reflection of when we're children, and we have our parent may be watching us, right? We're in the playground, and we have mom or dad, they're watching and they're there. There's this feeling of comfort and safety, that we know that someone is looking out for us.

And, and I think that's so critical that we always cherish that. And we always know because I know that many people, maybe many people are struggling right now. They may have lost loved ones they may have

family that they're not really connected to so there's a feeling of loneliness, but when you are aware of Allah's Presence, and you know, you're never really alone, you have you have that protection, you have that sense of it's beautiful. You said that I was just reading a book today and talking about the benefits, you know, the studies on solitude and silence, and a really important, you know, obviously Call to Action basically about spending some time alone every day in solitude to kind of heal our brain heal our heart. And as Muslims you know, that is so important that prophetic you know that concept of being in the presence of God without anyone else or having that solitude in

Ramadan, for example. aitikaf so it was really important distinction they're making that in those studies were that some people take like, because there's so on all the time, they're always in the background, the TV on the background, the radio in the background, they're scared to be alone with their thoughts. Right, you know, and learning to kind of be in that space of solitude to cultivate your best self is such an important thing, especially as Muslims we know that Allah is with us Allah's presence because I'm, I'm held in the Mercy of Allah, Allah Azza. Rama is near Allah as you know, Allah is really close. Allah's Rama is always close. So that can give us that comfort. I think

the visualization you were talking about having?

Very important because I've had so many clients tell me that they actually are afraid to be alone with their thoughts, because the thoughts are something that they they've let the horse just run and take its course and so they don't feel like they're in control. And so when you have fear of being alone, that means that there's a lot that needs to be worked on. So it would be a critical part of

about the whole the past thing is to bring you to a state of mindfulness, right? Because it's so easy to just kind of forget and want to grab, like I was preparing a thought. And I wanted I was just about to like taste the cherry tomato, as I was making salad, it was so easy. And you always have to be mindful that even though and even though you're thirsty, even though you're hungry, you can't act impulsively. Because anytime we get ourselves into trouble, it's because of what?

acting impulsively and not being mindful. So it's just how beautiful how Allah is training us to be hyper vigilant. So we have to see like, what is actually missing in the worship? What's what's really missing, right, what's really missing? I think, like, I think that, you know, as many were kind of discussing, this is such an important thing to think about, like what's missing in our, our, in our worship, what's missing, missing in that relationship with God, I think that it's what's missing is that presence of heart that that perspective is God's with with me. Right, and that, that, you know, lacking lacking of the emotions, the emotions are missing in that motion, we're

going through where we're missing that emotional attachment and that ability to connect with Allah in our heart that can stay beyond the worship with right. Well, going back to what you said about lack of presence of heart. That's, that's really critical. And another analogy. So imagine you are you're taking your phone, like a repertoire of analogies where you just pick them out from or where did they go? It's all here. On the spot, you know, it's three decades of doing counseling and Hamdulillah. And having to make very complicated concepts simplify easy for people. Yes, yeah. So imagine your phone as soon as we see oh, my god of Scotland, the red and I want to like, I want to

charge it right. And we get the charger. And, and this is the wrong charger. Okay. And then you put it in, okay? And you're just like, so you're thinking, Oh, great. Let me put it in. And in the morning, you don't maybe you don't wake up and you're like, Oh, my God, what's going on? You see the battery's dead. It's dead, because you didn't ensure that it clicked, you know, that click that it tells you Okay, now it's it's charging. When our heart is not present, we we haven't really connected, connect, right? We haven't connected and that's why people are just going through the motion. Right? And, and the psychological concept of like, the presence is the mindfulness, right?

Just being fully aware in the present, you're not thinking about, Oh, gosh, I can't believe so. And so said this, or what am I going to make for a thought? No, you are there in the moment. And what's beautiful, is that's when we feel the horseshoe. Right. Yeah. So who Chu is, only when you're thinking about the meaning, then the smallest thing can get you teary eyed. But when you're just like, you're not really present than there's no chance of who shot? Yeah. And you know, the beautiful beauty of our this is like the beauty of our our deen is that when I was going through my mindfulness trainings and certifications and so on, you know, like, three, four or five years ago, I

started making all these connections. I'm like, oh my god, like, we're not practicing these things that we have learned in this kind of experiential way. And, you know, our teachers and scholars they have taught us like, hundreds of years ago, right 1000s of almost like 1000 years ago, all these texts that came out on mindfulness and who shooing prayer, for example, you want because Ali's work, you know, and his work on Kitab acetyl Salah, the secrets of Salah he talks about six qualities of six tools of mindful Salah like a horseshoe, right? And the first thing he says is who do not call, which is the presence of heart. That how do you have that presence of how do you how is your heart

connected? Yeah, I love that analogy, by the way that you know, just connecting that power, that connecting heart to that experience, because then you do it and sometimes you just go through the motions. And that takes us to the next thing, the lack of like,

it's the lack of emotion. It's not the motion but the emotion. What was the catch? That's not the motions, it's the emotions in it. Yeah, it's connecting. And in actually Imam Ghazali mentions he mentioned certain emotions, he says, you know, after hoodoo, they'll call you should try to learn to understand and connect to the like the Quran what's what are we reciting what, what are the meanings, right? Or the eschar? You're saying what is the what do they really mean? So that understanding of what you're saying really helps you

connect to that space and connect with your heart to that space. So learning to understand what you were setting is important. But then after those two tools, he goes right into emotions. He says, You need to have Talim of Allah, that you're standing have this respect that you're standing in front of Allah, you know, yeah. And then he said that as a Muslim, you should start with that you should start with Adam. But that's not enough with Allah, you should even go higher than Tallinn to Haber, where you have like all so he said, like a like somebody that you might even have, you might even have like this sense of presence with somebody that comes to beg from you like even for a beggar or

for anyone you might have presence of heart because you're present with them. But with Allah with the presence of God, you have certain emotions. And that's like starts at respecting tithing in front of them standing from Allah. And then second Haber, which is in honor of Allah, that Allah the great met the king of the heavens in the earth, that I am in standing in front of him. So bringing an activity or emotions are so important, mashallah, it truly, truly is and, and when you have that respect, and you are mesmerized, then that really brings an attentive heart that really makes you want to do your best because it is it is when you are heedless that you said, right. As long as we

have those, you know, as long as we have our system, our satellite dish on and we are like, let's say receiving and we are focused, then in that way, we are like, Oh my gosh, you're you're thinking about accountability, you're thinking about consequences, you're thinking about the hereafter, it is when you are not having those thoughts is when you can fall into error. So very, very critical. I remember. Oh, go ahead. No, go ahead, finish. So

we were I think, on our way to Austin, and on the way we stopped by to, to pray. And we were praying. And then there are these little kids the whole time, they were just like running back and forth. And there's like six of them. And they were just making lots of noise. And there was like it was really hard to focus. So after it's finished, and I'm like, Oh, I better get to them before the message of police. Because someone's gonna reprimand them. And they may like have a negative association to the messages. So I went, I sat with them. I'm like, I'm going, I want to talk to you guys. I go, you know how much Allah loves you that you're in the masjid right now. And they all like

they were beaming. And I'm like, it's really, it's great that you're so young, and you're at the message. And then I told them, you know, let's see if there was a president of a company like other country, if there was a president, how would you stand around them? Or what would you do if they were, and if there's like, oh, we would be very polite, we'd be very bikal. But this is, like you said, this is the creator of the universe, when we're praying. And they just like something clicked, something clicked and they were just like, oh, like, you know, I get it. And so Subhanallah even young children can understand that concept of being in the presence of Allah and you have to act

differently. And if we can instill that in our kids from an early, you know, early age, then it can be cultivated as they get older, beautiful, beautiful example of how to talk to our kids, it becomes one of those, you know, the shouting matches in the masjid Ramadan, like, you know, everybody gets quiet and the kids and so you know, how do we also make our Masjid a place where people feel welcome. And our kids feel nourished and, and welcome at the same time, you've got to have boundaries and you know, for a process and hopefully space for them to also kind of be a little bit themselves without it, but not every message does. Right. So right, right. I was just actually

talking to a friend how we need to make like soft play areas for children. I know that one Masjid in Clear Lake has it where they can they can just bounce around, they love going to the maesters like, can we go to them?

And it just it creates a good positive association. Yeah, yeah. I was saying that there are a couple of more things that you know, like you're saying, they're just really showing up for Allah that Who are you standing in front of email goes out, you mentioned a couple of other emotions that can like bring that zeal of our heart. There's not a lot of people might say that these are all really great. You know, these are all really great things that you guys are saying, but how do I even like have my have get my heart to be present?

And so it's like, if somebody's somebody said, they're gonna give you a surprise, and they're bringing something really special for you, and they bring the surprise gift for you. How would you show up in that space? Like it? Maybe it's your spouse, maybe it's a loved one. Maybe it's up

Aren't, somebody brought something really, you know, beautiful and they said, you know, there's really an amazing surprise for you. And I want you to wait for me. And so you, you can wait for them to like, open that gift bag and open their apps present that to you and your heart is really present and you're excited, right? You're excited for that moment. You're really excited, or you haven't seen a loved one for so long. And they're coming to see you after like a year or two years. Maybe it's your mom, maybe it's a relative, maybe it's a friend, and how would you be anticipating when they arrive and see them and to give them a hug. So you know, this zeal of meeting Allah subhanaw

taala the heart you know, because Allah mentioned that you should have a lot of Raja that you are going

home when you start you're going to get so much so much is going to be given to you in this prayer so everything you want all the solutions of all your problems everything you want in this world everything you wanted this hair off this Salah could be the key to those things right? Did you approach this allow that zeal like this is like me unwrapping a beautiful gift, because beauty coming to Allah He if I come to align pray, what does that mean? You know, what does that mean? Who am I standing in front of who is in charge of all the treasures? Right? And so yeah, no, that's amazing. I amazing. I never thought of it as opening up a gift. And when ladies, we all love getting

those gifts, right? And the excitement and what is it this time? And what are we getting? And so having that associating that with the prayer I think is lovely. And you know who embodied this layout. Haha, my mother, when the Yvonne I mean, the adult hadn't even called and my mom would be like, it's late. It's late. It's late. And I would look at the time I'm like, Mom, the Avant has not even called you're making me anxious. But she really looked at it. I mean, when the Prophet salallahu alayhi salam, and he was under so much stress and he would tell Bilal relieve us in a relieve us by calling the IDI she bring us relief with it. We bring relief with it all below. Yeah,

bring it. Yeah, yeah. So it's having that anticipation. Because only people who get who have mindfulness can look at the salah like that. If you're just going through the motions, it's like an obligation, it's a duty, if I don't do it, I'm going to hell. But like, a lot of people look at it that way. But a person who can actually enjoy the summer, that's the one who's going to anticipate it. Yeah. So whichever, those of you that are watching whichever these emotions work as a hook for you don't have to remember all of them. If you can even choose one of them and say, I'm going to really I'm really overcoming withdraw of just thinking about this one verse, I just visited this

beautiful place. And while Allah is the Creator of the heavens and earth, I'm feeling this connection with all that's the emotion I'm going to connect myself with. Or I'm just really excited to be in front of Allah and just get everything that salah is a key. If so I can open Jana, which is like the ultimate treasure of Allah, why can't it open any of the treasures that I need for anything else I need. So having that deep sense of like gift wrapping, you know, you know, opening the gift wrapping and getting the beautiful gift from Allah, that seal of showing up in other men and other emotion even because Allah mentioned is called is higher, he says that you should have higher when

you stand in front of Allah, this deep modesty to show up in front of Allah that, you know, just thinking about like, wow, like, me, me, Allah called me to prayer, who am I to have this beautiful like being called, like, when you being called to the, you know, like you said President or the Kings court or somewhere very special, like, wow, I got selected to be here. I got invited. So just kind of thinking like, I got invited to be here. Wow. Like this modesty of like, I don't deserve it. But I'm so glad. Yeah. That's kind of like, you know, having that sense of humility, right? Well, to expand on your analogy, you're good at analogies to my show a lot. And to expand on that as far as

being invited or having this connection. How difficult is it to get in touch with someone who is famous, right, or someone who is powerful, like to be able to make even an appointment or even get their contact? Like there you have to go through so many different all the interviews we have to do before Ramadan, right. That's exactly like we had to go through a lot to get everyone a handle on most of them were friends. So that made that made it easier. But really, it's just this, this feeling of, you know, when you know, as a strong and powerful friend, everyone likes to kind of like brag about that, right? Like I know, you know this person who may be maybe we shouldn't brag about

but you know what it is you feel like you're connected to someone being powerful, right? And whether whether it's someone who owns company

He is or whatever it is, but to have that connection with our Creator and to realize that at any time we can connect and he's, you know, 24/7 That's a very comforting feeling and Hamden Yeah, yeah. And I always add, like when I teach my masterclass it I add like with those six things, the Mongols alysus I add the prophetic saying like when the eye shows and I asked him, Why do you have to get up and like your feet is swollen? That you have to like that? Why do you have to stand for so long? Did Allah forgive all your sins, all your past sins and your future sense? And the the process? I would say that if that is really true, that I feel like I've done shakoora The Should I not then be

grateful servant of God, like like it like this person doesn't need the forgiveness, even Allah forgive everything. Yeah, then they're driven by the deep gratitude, you know, of just standing in front of that. So that's how you connect to that. The first thing you start your Salah with, you know, after your, your outline Bismillah you the first Iron recite is hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen. And, and you just think about you show up with that deep, how can I just show up with that gratitude. The first is like look forward to seeing the far side from every cell in your body. The one was the last time that I thanked Allah from a trillion cell that I've gotten my body like as if

like all my cells and all my organs and all my limbs and everything, all my neurons, all my everything my mind, body and soul is here to face the fibula. And I'm going to say sugar thank you to Allah from all parts of my body all parts of just like really making that sugar they'll handle me that just really come from your heart so that their response is so blessed when Allah says Hamid Hamid any other your hands any update on my slave has praised me, Allah responds by you know, and such a beautiful way to start our prayer. incredible incredible. And I witnessed a a shared really embody this because you feel it, when the person who is reciting is mindful, they're mindful of the

meaning their heart is present. And even the, their whole attitude, everything is is online. With this one, one shift. It wasn't Ramadan, it wasn't any special occasion. And it was just I think it was Jama. And he started with the fact that and he was in tears, which justify the heart. Because usually it builds up right, it builds up and, and maybe like at a very particular part of an idea that is very powerful. It comes on but here it was just saying the the fight to heart and he was in tears and it made everyone tear up as well. And so that is I feel whenever someone is reciting it has a lot to do with the presence of the heart. And I'd like to say this is sponsored also by

maraca.com. So yeah, it's it's coming actually they're taking turns with both the brands I only saw

mindful heart so I wanted to I see you I love your logo, the mindful hearts logo, the Arabic I never asked like it's so beautiful. The thank you so much. It is until I believe it's automatic remind me until Harsha isn't it? We? He designed that actually. And about the mindfulness and being there we go. Okay.

Make sure we carry that. Yeah, I know. We were talking about that. That relationship like that connection that you said someone cried the chef cried with just fast. Yeah. You know, it's like,

can we like after we recite the verses? Can we wait for a second even if it's just a split second in our mind, or just kind of tune in as we about to go to the next verse. To almost like listening. Like, like, you know, like, like a lot of times our hearts don't listen to the Quran. And, and a lot of times what we do in our Salah is we've seen in our tongue and our ears don't even hear it. So yeah, so our scholars and teachers, they said you should recite at least two of you in a way that your ears can hear it because these are channels, you know, to your heart. So all these limbs you have to activate to to you know, use for your heart. But when you are able to recite like as if

you're reciting from the heart, like when was Ali mentioned that these are the macabre bone they recite the Quran from their heart. They don't recite just from their tongue. Yeah, and it's just such a beautiful thing to be able to listen in and say, like, Okay, I sit up hamdulillah rub me like Allah is responding to me now. How does that feel? Like you know, just like that little moment of awareness as you say, you know, Rahmani Raheem.

It's amazing, like just listening. Well, it reminds me of, you know, the birth with cervical. And that's a big boon,

II kalamalka, Raghu, G H and nerd. And I mean, so they are racing. And I think that's what we need to instill in our self because there are lots of competitive people. And I like to be competitive. I like to be competitive in sports, I like to, I like to compete against myself in the sense of, you know, reaching a higher level higher standard each each year. And so if we tap into that, tap into the competitiveness, right, and this is what I experienced when I went to the one of the first halacha ladies Halla buzz,

such sincere Sisters where everyone was competing for doing good things, right. So let's say the teacher would say I need this, I need this to be back then we need to like Xerox right? To get this copy it everyone would be like, Oh, I'll do it. I want the extra edger and you would see someone Oh, I started memorizing, I want to memorize too. And someone else, whatever it was, there was this competition to do good. And I really feel like we have to tap into that and surround ourselves with people who, who kind of

Ignite that in us. Because I know for many years before that halacha I was, you know, I was probably like the most religious amongst my circle, right? And so you become complacent and you feel like okay, this is this is good enough, right? But then when you are when you surround yourself with people who are practicing and doing more, you get motivated to do more.

Yeah, you know, it'd be nice to see what questions that our audience have about how to transform your relationship with Allah. You know, feel free to put your questions in. Like what are some questions you have about how to transform your relationship with Allah? What are some challenges that you would like to address or the challenges that someone's addressing or someone's going through in your close circle that you'd like to you'd like to address CIC Fatima from Cape Town Marcia welcome Fatima everybody's Masha Allah may Allah bless all of you that are here live and everybody that's gonna be watching

mashallah, Egypt, Cairo, masha Allah, Allah bless. Yes, that was we were there for about a good six years with Suzanne Ma sha Allah beautiful memories there. Something as you all are writing your questions. When we're talking about what is missing, right? What is missing, that people are praying and doing all this acts of worship, but they're still behaving so badly. And one of it is lack of understanding of the purpose, right? We have to recognize what is the purpose? Does Allah need us to go up and down? Does Allah need us to refrain from eating and drinking? It's really it's about giving it meaning. And I'm sure there's a lot that you could say about it, when you understand the

purpose of prayer is to really

make you a better individual. Then you do it with with that mindfulness? Yes, yes, you know, and our teachers, they teach us that the purpose of Salah the purpose of prayer, is how can your life outside salah, be like your life insights. That's why

in that way, in Salah when you're standing, when you're saying Allahu Akbar, you let go of everything else, that's a distraction. And you only take what Allah has asked you to do and what you're going to be focusing on and every Allahu Akbar, you say, is a cue for you to bring your attention back to Allah, that Allah is greater than all of those distractions, you're training your mind and your heart to be more focused. You're doing what Allah has, Allah has asked you to do with the Presence of Allah and your heart and the Prophet systems. So Luca Mara, it's when you sully the prayer as you've seen me praying so we're, you're reviving every action and movement of the Prophet.

And this is just the training, that when you step outside the prayer, you should be present in your heart. And your the Sunnah. And the way the person showed up should be present in your body, the way you show up with your family, the way you show up in your business, in the way you do your dealings, in the way that you speak. All of those things have the same qualities of the Salah that are always in the presence of God, you're doing it in the equation where the prophet and you're basically training yourself conditioning yourself to be like that. And this is what Allah says in the Quran. insalata 10 her annual fascia it will not go at Salah per view from fascial Monica, what does that

mean? It brings it trains your heart to be away from fascia and Monica from those things that are that are shameful those things that are

not permitted that those things that take you away from God in your best self Salah prevents you from that. What does that mean? The Salah is training you to the point that we know the story about this holiday is just you know, the the new Muslim, right? He used to steal. And then people said he steals and he became Muslim in the process and let him pray. Let him pray. And as he started praying that prayer transformed his heart and he stopped doing that because the real Salah that is connected, the heart is connected to God is going to train our heart to then take those qualities outside the prayer.

That's, that's a very deep reflection on just be the way you are outside of prayer with that kind of same mindfulness that you're in prayer. And it also reminds me of like how we are, let's say when we're doing obrah, right? When you're in Umrah, like everything is about the prayer, everything revolves around the prayer, you won't eat, if it's going to make you miss the prayer, you, uh, you squeeze in the shopping and the eating and the sleep. And it's all about the prayers. And so if we can have that prioritizing, right, prioritizing, the prayer in the worship is also very critical. Because then when you come back then reality hits and and you find that you're squeezing into

prayer,

around your work and around your family. But we really need to keep that the priority, correct? Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. And, and this theme that we're talking about this Ramadan that don't just don't just do more, but be more. So don't just finish your Salah, don't just check it off. But become more through the prayer, become a better version of yourself through this prayer that this prayer transform how you show up who you become, you know, and that's the intention, how do you go from this transactional that I just check it off transactional, to transformational this prayer transformed my character, this prayer transform the way I showed up? Well, first and foremost, I

mean, you have to have the right knee. Yeah. Right. If you don't have the intention, I mean, now, in psychology, they've done so much research on the importance of intention. And when when you live a life with intention, or you intend to do something, how it puts everything into motion, for instance, yep, the reticular activating system, the RAS, that is a filter for your brain. So if you are putting your RAS to how can I transform in this prayer, everything you do is going to get you to focus on that, right. And, and so we really need to recognize that the intention behind every act of worship, and this is the objective that brother would do and and I have for for this series is to

really ignite that, that desire to want to be more. And you know, you have your checklist, you have the things that you need to do each day, but also be aware of how are you changing, and when you when you want to change, and you want to be a better version of yourself, you want to overcome some of your shortcomings. So that is, you got to go into the worship with that intention. Yeah, you know, that's really important. And people ask me, like, Do Muslims have like meditation? You know, like, when I was doing my mindfulness certification, I had my Jewish colleagues and my, you know, my Christian colleagues, people from all over the country that was training with me, and we had

questions and, you know, talks and discussions about fate, and how to incorporate faith and the traditions of meditations mindfulness, and faith and do muscles meditate. And, you know, in other than the deep science and art of mindfulness and meditation that many of our teachers and scholars showed us, or the backdrop of meditation being the backdrop of revelation for Ibrahim alayhis salam and the prophesy Salonika going into the cave, and so on, even beyond all of that simple act of Nia that he just mentioned, yeah, that a Muslim has to meditate for that micro moment, before everything we do. So intentions and Nia are those micro moments of meditating and thinking the how do I show

up? How do I be present? And how do I do this in a way that can turn this into a Baba that can turn it in a way that take me closer to Allah so those nears are a gift from Allah, they help you come back to the present moment. They help you transition to the next thing. So you're not thinking about your work. When you show up at home. You're not thinking about something else you did somewhere else. When you show up at the dinner table. You're not thinking about another conversation when your kids are running to you and you're showing up with your kids. Because you're supposed to be having the NIA to buy hasn't in that moment, you know, and I have a tool if should I share? Sure, sure.

Sure. It's simple, very simple. Three steps. Yeah, like just, you know this

The three steps, this is a simple tool, but it's really, really important tool pretty much in every type of mindfulness training, or do they teach you one, some form of this tool like even, you know, the MBCT program I'm doing at Brown right now, you know, also as a similar tool. So three is basically three breaths to two presents, and I use it for the intention, three breaths to really show up for your intention. And I talked about this in my article, you know, be cut, don't do more, because don't just do more, become more. And this three steps is like take a breath, to just come back and bring your awareness back to the back to the present moment, just take a breath, this first

step is focus your mind on the breath, this is the first step. And the second step is then take it take a deep breath, and then relax your muscles, your body and just check in with your body. A lot of times we carry tension from that meeting I just attended. And I bring that tension and the stress in my chest and my shoulder and my back in my body, you know, the body carries a lot of those emotions into the neck, going into. So take a deep breath and release as you exhale, as you take a long exhale, release all those tension, let go of the past, let go the future be here in this moment. And then third step is take another deep breath and come back to your heart and say, How can

I show up in this moment? What's really important now, what's my intention? Now, something very simple, you know, like, you know, one, you just take a deep breath, gather your gather your mind, on your breath, you know, focus your attention, mind. And then another deep breath, body, releasing the tension. And then third, the heart, bring the intention in your heart seemed very simple, but it's a quick practice to get used, switched, very effective, very, very effective. I do that with my, with my clients. And it's definitely you learn to just shift gears, right? Like how many of you that ever I learned on a stick shift, okay. And then learning how to shift gears was one of the hardest

things. And, but when you learn to do it, and you do it effectively, it's critical. And those people who can shift gears and changing your state because, you know, with on the mindful, mindful heart Academy, our whole focus is on bringing that mindfulness in daily, daily life, right and in how you're dealing with others and how you show up. And then being able to change your state is so important, like what you just gave us like three simple steps. And you can actually go from being very stressed and angry, to being calm by just becoming aware of your breathing and so great, great tool. Mashallah. What about when you're starting the prayer, the woowoo? It's the mindful we do, how

can that transform us? Yeah, that's another hour is the audience ready for it? I think we gotta stick to the

umbrella. So So you know, you know, in simple terms, just that intention can shift the way we show up in our world, you know, like the prophesy Salam he like to do is that foundation, that building block of Salah, and will do is separate about a lot of us, you know, we just like, Oh, God, I gotta pray. And then we run to the sink and luxury, we just like do our thing, whatever we do, and then we run to the prayer, and we forget about who do you know, that's like, one extreme. On the other extreme, you know, like, I'm sure you've seen clients. And I think when you're discussing one time, about some people getting carried away by their do where they're like, Oh, am I doing this in the

right way? And so how do we really show up in that we'll do in a nice and clean way that makes our heart like getting ready. I'm getting ready. Now I'm cleansing myself off, like cleansing, not just myself externally with the water. But internally, literally, the process of sins are falling off, like falling off from even behind your fingernails upon on law. So just coming in with that intention, and looking at it as a worship itself. You're right, a lot of times people just see it as like, Okay, this is the prerequisite. Let me get through it. And and I'm so glad that you mentioned that, you know, the two extremes are not caring at all. And then many times I've had clients and

this is quite prevalent, that they have obsessive compulsive disorder, OCD, and they can get quite the bill. It's debilitating how much they worry about the widow. So maybe they heard it lecture, someone said, if you are if your widow is not perfect, your prayer is not accepted and you're going to the hellfire. So I had a little Yes, I had an eight year old who would spend five hours a day

For her would do and prayers, five hours. And so can you imagine how demotivating that is? And so that's why I always ask the show, I'm like, please don't use the word perfect. Don't say, your wudu has to be perfect. Your prayer has to be perfect because some people take it literally. And they are they get stuck. So thank you for clarifying. Yeah, no, that's amazing. And, you know, there's actually, you know, Imam Ghazali mentioned this in the diet of hedaya beginning guidance, that there is a shaitan that is specifically given this task of distracting people in their and giving, bringing confusion to your prayer. So this is where our teachers say that when those you have those

wasa or those whispers, do not to pay attention and not to repeat, not to repeat, because once you start repeating thinking oh, I didn't know my hand I didn't my feet, then they are going to get hold of you and let you just kind of distract and get completely carried away by Yeah, that whole thing. Rather, we're just focusing on like, okay, one time one washing of the body is enough. And three is the Sunnah the process that whoever does one, you know, has has done their will do but whoever does three has done my son and that's the complete will do. So three is like more than enough. We don't do more than three. And that there's a reason we don't waste water. We don't waste our energy, but

also why are you doing the three? How can you be really present? How can you think of like since falling off Allah's Rama coming to me, Allah's forgiveness coming to me, and literally this will do like after I finish all a DOORS agenda will be open, what type? Like why how just this this is, this is such an a brother that can open all eight doors agenda? Yes. Because you know, you're not you're really cleansing your body and your heart and your soul in this process to get ready to stand in front of Allah Subhan itself.

And that takes me to one, I think I believe it was the Sahaba that when he was doing the widow because he was doing such mindful will do that he would go completely pale. And they said, you know why? Why are you so pale what is happening? And he discussed what he and maybe you could share with us, brother, as far as like that there is one narration about the process of face becoming pale. As soon as he heard the than the, the, you know, the color of his face would change. Because now he's like, really his face is showing that starting to build that intention and that shift, and to really show up. So I'm not 100% sure about the Sahaba reference, but this is what I I'm aware. But yeah,

like in terms of like, like really being overcome by the remembrance of Allah that I'm preparing myself now. You know, I'm cleansing myself now. And the beautiful thing about this is that Allah deals with according to your intentions, according to your expectations, right? That prophets have told us this beautiful principle that can define everything we do. So if we stand in our if we sit in our will do a lot of times the President will do, by the way, he took it from a measure, like a little cup or like a vessel that he used, he sat down, so it was not running water. So a lot of times, you know, when we're teaching or practicing, you know, we say, Don't do it from a tap, like

invest in a like a stool, you can sit on invest in a mug, or a measuring cup or something that you can pour the water so you're making what we'll do from still water, so your mind is not running water, you're relaxed, so that that has really transformed a lot of our students that just think that now how do I do that? It really changes and shifts kind of like this mind really kind of like calms down and becomes more still as you sit and as you're doing.

And as you're just going through the motions you think of the Voodoo as a lawyer Butoh been Allah loves those returned to him herbal Moto, he loves those who purify themselves. So Allah's love is promise with this, we'll do like what like just activating that emotion as you're doing. Right? Right. And then visualizing, you know, the fact that you you can attain the agenda because the power of visualization is is amazing. I have like a whole lesson on that about how visual visualization can help you achieve your goals. And so, if you think about the fact that you you can attain Jenna, or that you can avoid the Hellfire like the fact that you know if if we're not cautious we could

fall into it. And and just having that sense of presence that Allah is watching, then it just makes you stay in the present.

Yes, yeah. And this is something that it's just you know, like you as a parent, I mean, you you in psychology have a full understanding of the set. You know, the importance and the power of visualization.

How it's used now in cognitive behavioral therapy and all these, you know, different modes and ways of training the mind, right and mental health visualization is such an important thing, even in coaching and you know, even in like, personal transformation work is such an important thing, visualizing your best self, but in terms of our teachers is just amazing like that you see this, you know, hundreds and hundreds and 1000s of years ago and text that is appearing on like these examples, they're practicing, like the visuals, and the processing was actively trying to bring this visualization to the Sahaba and he said, who said this who said, you know, from then coffee or on

mobile or console even who said this? And somebody said, yeah, so I did. And he said, there are 30 angels there are this many angels that are running to get the reward of that to take it all us. Yeah. So this visualization that he was bringing to the Companions even though they couldn't see the kind of visualize that so important and you want Ghazali mentions on mindful Salah that he interviewed like this one scholar was interviewed, his name was happiness and Rahim Allah, how do you have such beautiful Salah and he said that before I pray, I sit at the place of prayer. I collect myself inwardly and outwardly, you know, this is where that those three breaths can come in

mind, body, heart, connect, drive and yourself. And then I visualized as if I'm standing in front of the Kaaba, I'm standing and then Geminis on my right. And the gentleman on my left, the Angel of Death Behind me, the bridge of syrup is, you know, underneath me, and I'm really focusing on this as if this is my last prayer, as if this is the sword with the visualization. It is like wow, this Salah can really get me there, you know, this, one of the rewards that's mentioned mentioned is that you crossed the bridge, the speed of lightning, you know, was that that you mentioned? Hatem? asimilar, was the reference, right?

That He visualized, so great. Yeah. Yeah. So it's Yeah, visualizing all of that. And you know, as a faith based counselor, I really rely on getting my clients back on track so many times you find that there's a cognitive dissonance so they have been raised in a religious home, but they are not practicing let's say they stopped praying and getting them back and Alhamdulillah you know, I can I have the liberty to talk about the religion because it's, you know, faith based and getting them to really connect with their Creator. And that relieves them of so much of the Depression, sometimes even the suicidal thoughts, or the anxiety. And when someone would, you know, it's like, when you

believe that prayer is important, and you pray, then you have that congruence. So that really, really is critical and having the psychological stability and peacefulness

under law, yeah, yeah. Michelle, a beautiful work that you do. May Allah bless you and you're a pioneer in this space. So there's so much we can learn from you. So in terms of this transforming our relationship with Allah right, this Ramadan, another tool, I think we're reaching like our one hour mark here. Yeah, and those of you that are watching live, may Allah bless you for being here with us. Mashallah, feel free to send any questions you might have that you want us to answer, we can also answer them in the mindful Ramadan WhatsApp channel. If you haven't joined the channel, maybe the team can post the channel, link inside the comment in the chat window for people to join,

you get reminders in the WhatsApp channel, you know, every day or right before we're going live. So it helps you also get them in your email. So alhamdulillah so glad to have all of you here. You know, in terms of one of the tools that I'm trying to practice this Ramadan, is that okay, people talk about like, you know, connecting with the Quran, you know, and how to bring it down to like a micro level of a small attainable goal. And a small attainable goal that I'm trying is like, Okay, I'm really going to try to tune in, when they're reciting the Quran and try to connect with one even just one verse every Rekha night, you know? Because if you think about like, Okay, is there even one

verse? And you might feel like, okay, just one verse already supposed to like, listen to all the Quran, you know, you think that and then you've gone to Rekha without even knowing which sources are cited. Yeah, you know, so. So sort of break it down to something very simple. Just look for one verse in every record that you can connect with, even if you don't understand Arabic, just you know, there might be a name of Allah like a Rahman Al Rahim, or Aziza, Hakeem, or you know, like, you know, maybe there is diversity, you know, some maybe this is a word, you know, just reflect a little bit connect with that try to feel that just a couple of nights ago at Tara we I had that experience

and the verse that stood out was that they plan and Allah plans and Allah is the best of planners and that that just I stayed with that. You know, those phrases for like throughout that whole recap because I felt like

This is telling us about what's going on in Palestine. And so when you think about I like how you tell tell us to just focus on maybe one phrase one word throughout that whole blackout mashallah, there is a question that came in is there any da to recite during glue and for increased focus during salah?

Yeah, that's a really good question. So in terms of those are, you know you, you basically just discuss Dwyer is supposed to be something that's from the heart, something that start by praising Allah sending Salah to the Prophet and then just speak from your heart and just have a conversation with Allah. Just have a position with Allah and just talk to Allah and say Allah please give me the tools teach me the strategies teach me how to have Krishna and my salah, teach me how to experience my salah, teach me how to transfer my salah, bring me those teachers those knowledge, those T tools, those environments, where I can trance just keep making that dua you will see that if you make that

dua sincerely from your heart, you repeat the DUA and you you really speak from your heart to Allah. Allah. Yeah. I think that's the best though. Ah, that's definitely the best slide shall. Yes, definitely. And another thing is, you know, why do we read the Quran we do it many times because we want the rewards, right? And we know that each letter counts as 10. And then there's even more reward during Ramadan. And there is this excitement to complete the Quran because you want all that reward. Now imagine, okay, the amount of rewards you get for just reciting it, versus learning it and applying it and having it transform you like wow, like that's at a totally different level. We

could just read, right, versus you read it to actually have it change you. So let's aim for that this Ramadan, this Ramadan, we're going to focus on transforming ourselves in sha Allah and, and becoming more as brother would do eloquently said earlier that we're going to do more, and we have Inshallah, if you join us next, next Thursday, right for the life.

We have like an exciting announcement, right? Something coming up? Yes.

hamdulillah Hamdulillah. It's, it's about how to how to go from this internal, like this relationship between us and God. And take that to the external. How do we turn and connect our mindful worship and our fasting and connect it to our habits? How do we transform our habits, bad habits and bad character? Temptations? addictions, distractions? Is that what you meant sister Holly? Sorry, I was posting the WhatsApp. I was posting the WhatsApp link in that chat window. So I'm not sure if you meant no problem. No, that's our next lesson, which I'm glad you announced. That's our next lesson. So we talked about our relationship with Allah, then we're going to talk

about changing our character, but we have an important announcement about something really exciting in sha Allah after Ramadan, but we gotta like you gotta show up for the next slide to get what it is. Oh, yes. Okay. Yes.

That one in sha Allah, someone is saying sisters diba I usually say like bake when I'm doing with you, meaning I am answering to your call.

Yeah, yeah, that's beautiful. It's beautiful that you have that you know, anything that helps you kind of connect right to Allah Subhana Allah and present I'm here people have different ways of showing up. Imam Ghazali mentioned a chain of laws for who this is his recommendation and this is basically in a lot of the masters of Ischia and the scholars, they they did 30 of their students by teaching them certain things to help them get into the cognitive right cognitive frame. So it is not necessarily like completely directly from Hadith but it's inspired by the teachings of Quran and Hadees because many of the doors in Arabic when you look at them they're based in the IR or a Hadith

of the Prophet SAW Selim. So so so yeah, so the two as the Imam Ghazali mentions in a very very simple way if you want to remember and just kind of replay this part of the recording you know as you are kind of like starting to play you know Gerg putting water in your mouth Allah you know, make my tongue steadfast

make my tongue steadfast and saying what is the truth what is right and as you're washing your nose make me make me among those people that smell the fragrance of Jana.

Face Allah on that day when many faces will go dark, may make my face shine in front of

as you're watching a right hand Allah give me the book of these on my right hand as you washing your left hand Allah protect me

From him having a good book of days on my left hand, as you're wiping over your head, Allah cover me with YOU HAVE MERCY forgiveness. And then as you washing your right foot, Allah give me step passes on the bridge of server. And as you're washing your left foot, you're asking Allah to protect you from slipping and for from moving away from the right path. So very simply the essence of the DUA Zeeman Ghazali, teachers in Kitab al Assad will do the secrets of do How to yourself and connect the different actions that will do to a Quranic or a hadith connection. Or I love that I think that's going to change all of our windows in sha Allah from now on, we're going to be much more aware,

we're going to have that Nia and something about Nia now, we can, you know, see if there are any questions. For those of you who are really overwhelmed, whether it is with your children, whether it's with your work, whether it's with your relationships, or someone being sick, or you're sick, and you can't do what you normally would do during Ramadan, make sure that you make your intention, right, that as you're taking care of your children, that in itself is a worship, don't just be frustrated and annoyed from them, because then you don't even get the reward. Right? If you're taking care of your elderly parents, that counts as your worship and SubhanAllah. I remember one

year our Ramadan turned out to be quite different from what I had anticipated. And I initially I was a little frustrated, we were somewhere that they didn't really like, you know, I walked into the mess. And

they didn't even start from sort of pop that off first night there was like four ladies, it was like this remote village, and I was I was frustrated. I started crying not out of the chute, but out of just sadness.

This is gonna be the worst Ramadan ever. And, and I was just sad, not out of like, you know, just out of the spiritual experience, then I realized that, you know, Allah chooses the worship that he wants you to do. And that year was more about connecting with family, and it actually had a profound impact on on all of us. So don't be upset about your situation, make the most of it inshallah. Yeah, then is saying mashallah such beautiful to and remembrances to make during with just a collage era. Yeah. So also, you know, like people that have, they're having some type of difficulty maybe you're sick, you know, they will go to the masjid, you know, maybe you have eating disorders you have, you

know, in social anxiety, whatever you are, you have in case you have any of these challenges, not to worry about that Allah subhanaw taala has not confined you to one mode of worship, this is a beautiful, beautiful thing they just mentioned, Mr. Khalid, that you can just pray on your own and just be connected with your heart to Allah because Allah didn't say the people that are able to do all of this especially if you're not able to do it with your health with your mental or physical health. And instead let's say it's just become this version of yourself where you're aware you're conscious, you're connected with Allah, anyone can even lie down in your bed and be connected to

connect to heart to Allah you know, you can be in your room and be connected.

And you know, and just to end on this

on this story, my mom on layer haha, got to a point that you know, she became paralyzed and needing to, and the only way she would pray with by blinking her eyes that we always hear this but I actually witnessed my mom. And you know, she couldn't talk so we didn't know once she kept Oh, we didn't know what she wanted. We found that she wanted the hijab so that she could do her prayer and and so Subhanallah however you live your life at the end of your life it will be just you know those the habits will will show and will continue Allah grants are beautiful beautiful place in Jana and her beautiful reception beautiful Rama I mean just like a life Hayden everyone for for coming to

this and please share the link for those who weren't able to make it today and also the videos that are coming out next week. We have some incredible interviews that it's going to grab your grab your family and come join us live it's good to see you live it's always for teachers it's always great to see this engagement with the audience and your question so it helps when you guys show up live keep showing up live and now let's find the grant Utopia grant is autofeed more than we spoke and we shared May Allah grant us the ability to practice this in a way that transforms us each other does like a lot hate and brother would do it for your reflections beautiful reminders and and just it was

very beneficial mashallah does that

Hello Youtube inshallah May Allah bless you have a beautiful rest of the day inshallah everybody all right

bye bye