Bringing Up Champions
Channel: Yusuf Estes
File Size: 19.57MB
Sheikh Yusuf Estes, American Muslim Preacher & Teacher giving public lecture on the topic ‘Bringing Up Champions – Peace Makers 2010’
Episode Transcript ©
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So I would like to invite you to take the podium and address us this evening. Our dear brother, Chef Youssef masters from the USA to address the topic, bringing up champions, our brother used to Festus
Bismillah Alhamdulillah wa salatu salam ala rasulillah.
My name is Yousef, can you say you're?
Very good. You know, my wife still says useless, I don't know could be a speech problem.
The subject that we want to talk about tonight is a very near and dear subject to me, the subject of Qatar BIA,
but we didn't want to leave it in Arabic language. So we translated it more or less as raising up champions, because tarbiyah deals with the subject of how we educate and raise our children. One of the problems of many problems facing Muslims today is how do we deal with our youth. Now, whether you live in the east or the west, or somewhere in between? There's always this subject of how can I raise my children the best way. And it's a very important thing, because each and every one of these children is a mana
a trust from a law, and the law will ask us about it.
You've heard it from many of our speakers when they tell us what means in English, or you who believe save yourself
and your family, your children from a fire whose fuel is meant in stones. There's a Hadith of the Prophet Mohammed, some of it was Salaam, that means something like this, that out of every 1000 people
999 of those people,
they're not going to make it.
That means only one out of 1000 really well except this message of law in a llama. I'm going to sue law and do something about it.
We hear oftentimes, the same verses recited again and again, telling us the importance of calling to Islam. But before we even get into tonight's topic,
I want to remind myself
and share with all of you that when we talk about the word dour,
this word is being grossly abused.
When we talk about giving Dawa, to Muslims, dour to our Muslim family dour to our Muslim children. It's inappropriate to use this word in this way. Because actually dowa is to call people who are not Muslim to Islam. The word in Arabic that we're looking for is actually Islam. This is according to our scholars a much better way to describe encouraging and bringing each other closer to Allah subhanho wa Taala in the Quran, one of the most famous of all of the chapters, and I'm sure all of you memorized it when you were little guys. ls is out of the bag many shaytani r rajim Bismillah Ar Rahman AR Rahim while asked in mille insana. Luffy was Illallah Dena amanu Aminu Salah hackey. What
what was the suffering?
And again, you've heard people translate this and give the meaning of it, interpret it and I don't want to bore you with that. But for the sake of audiences that may hear this in the future that maybe they don't know Islam don't know Arabic. I'll endeavor to give you just a little overview of it. A look here is swearing by something amazing when he says while
he's swearing by the actual passage of time, some
thing about which we have little if any real concept. We think we know what time is, don't we?
But how long have I been talking?
How long will I talk? And how long before you forget everything I said,
when you're sitting at the traffic light, or title tied up in traffic,
seems like it goes on and on and all many hours. But you look at your watch, it was only a few seconds.
But when you're watching a soccer match or a cricket game,
it seems like just a few seconds. Oh, here's another commercial. And then a few more seconds, and it's all over. Why?
Because, of course, the things we like, and enjoy, things like that passes quickly. And last swears by this time.
And what what did he swear? And that's what's even more important, isn't it? He said for sure enough. Certainly.
Then these use the word insane. Insane doesn't just mean Muslims. It doesn't mean men. It doesn't mean women it means that every single human being
all of them, love the horse.
They are in what? what is causing
a horse the rain, these are the ones that are considered losers. So human beings are in a state of being bankrupt.
When we know about bankruptcy today, you're seeing in all the newspapers, so many different organizations going bankrupt, people declaring their bankruptcy, it just means they can't pay their bills in Islam host means the one who on the day of judgment on the day of accountability, they can't pay up. Because they don't have the right ingredients. They don't have the right denomination to be able to do it. They can that's all the human beings basically go into hell. That's it. Then a beautiful word comes in
lol Edina, except for those except for those who have Amen, the correct sign of a man in the law as one and only one.
And it's not all
and they do the almost the righteous deed still not over? Why? What a while. So what is that?
It means to encourage and push each other shove each other? Come on guys.
again, why was so
hot? What's the word? So this summer,
to encourage each other and all it is the truth of La la la la. And to encourage exhort each other to have perseverance,
But all of the words that I just said, are much more profound in Arabic than they are in English. English is very weak when it comes to trying to understand the depth, the gravity of the Arabic of the Koran. But did you understand what I showed you the Hadeeth or assume that almost every single person is going to go to hell. This should scare you because we're human beings. I dare say we've already got more than 1000 people here right now, does that mean that only one of us is going to go to Paradise? Well, there's more good news, by the way, some very good news
that not all human beings are represented here. In fact, the Muslims are supposed to be the exception to that rule, aren't they?
But what do we do? And I'm going to talk about current events. What do we do in the face of some very real statistics, when we find that the Muslim children, the Muslim youth are leaving Islam? I've seen it with my own eyes. No, not all of them are declaring that they want to be a Kaffir. Not all of them are saying I don't want to be on most of them anymore. But by their very acts that are very deep, the very things that they're sending me in emails, putting on websites, and that social network like Twitter,
Facebook, Myspace, which I call my disgrace. We're seeing things and hearing things from our youth that scare us. I already knew before I came here that I wanted to talk on this subject of our youth and how to raise them up. But I had no idea how much your law really wanted to drive the point home to me. The person who was supposed to take me to the airport didn't show up. They didn't come.
So I asked my wife if she would take me to the airport. It's a long drive. But she said yeah, let's go. We loaded up the whole van got ready to go out and
Yesterday as I was backing out of the driveway, a car pulled up a van. So I thought maybe this is the people who supposed to take me. I don't know what their car looks like. Then somebody got out. So I'm Monaco, Monaco, salaam. I said, Are you the one supposed to take me? He said, Take you wear a suit to the airport? He said you need to go to the airport. I said, No, no, it's okay. I'll have my wife update me. No, no, no, no, he says, I'll take you. Alright. So I get in the van with him. We loaded up the stuff. He said, I came all the way over here to talk to you. It's an emergency. I don't know what to do. I don't know where to turn, I need help. And you're the only one who can help
And I told him, if I'm the only one who can help you, you really do have a problem? What is it? He said, it's my children. And I wish that he was the only one who ever said it. But he's not. It's happening again. And again. And again. And again.
A sister comes and tells me about her brother, a brother tells me about his sister, the siblings telling about each other Uncles, aunts, cousins all contacting me with emails, phone calls, you're asking, help me help us. The problem is, they're coming to me just after the person has already left Islam,
just after the person has already gone to jail for drugs, just after somebody is diagnosed with some kind of terminal disease that they got by doing whatever.
In other words, they're coming in, it's too late. And this was the same case. When the brothers telling me, my kids,
I put them into university.
And now they're questioning Islam. They're there so that so and so.
And I said, When did you first think about this?
Is I've been too busy. And he you know, I've got to take care of this and that I have my job. I have my part time job of business. I'm trying to start on time.
So what will you tell Allah, on the day of judgment, about the way you raise your kids?
This is serious. Some of you are young, you're not even married yet. planning on getting married, or you're just recently married, going to start your family. Some of you have some children at home little guys.
But the fact is, if you don't start thinking about it right this minute, my question is going to be when are you going to think about it is going to be after you look up and see your child in this condition, whether they're on drugs, in jail,
or left Islam, all of these things, that's when it's too late.
Now, ordinarily, you see me with the children on TV, and we're playing and having fun,
and talking about Islam. But this is a time for me to be serious with you about those children, because I can't sit with all of them. I wish I could. But you can do something right now. First thing is, I don't care if you remember me or what I said. But you need to think
think about what you're going to say on the Day of Judgment. What would you say to along about taking care of your family? And it's not about the food. And it's not about the house and the clothes and education, which all of us put such a high value on? There's a bigger value that comes first, isn't it? The man in the law?
Isn't that first. Those who like myself come to Islam by choice. Seems like they have a better grasp of that. You know why? We've already been there. We've already seen that. We know what it's all about. And we know what it doesn't do.
We want to encourage ourselves all of us to make use of this time while we still have it.
What does this lamb tell us about our children? A Hadith of the Prophet sallallaahu salaam has had such an impact that we've used it in many ways usually when we talk about Dawa, but actually, the idea wasn't about Dawa. It was about how to raise your children. The province Li Salaam use the word in Arabic called fitrah. Now, you know which he didn't want to tell you. The province till Islam said every child is born on the fitrah of all it's loud, but it is their parents who will raise them up to be a Christian, a Jew, a fire worshiper.
Whatever they become, it's going to be really by the way they were raised up. Is that true or not? If you heard it,
you've heard it. And that's why today in English we say when somebody came to Islam, we even use this idea to come up with a word in English.
revert, instead of saying convert, you're saying you revert, you're just going back to your natural status. The way you were when you came into the world, the innocence the beauty of the baby, you know, the little babies, they almost look innocent they are.
And it's true as it is, it's still not the main point is, the main point is you're supposed to be raising your children as Muslim.
What does it take? I'm gonna give a couple examples before I walk off the stage, if you don't mind.
happened a number of years ago when one of our brothers from an Arab country. And by the way, he told me clearly, to use his story for other people. I want you to know that this is how much it had an impact. Anyway, I met him, he came to our Masjid back when I used to have a mosque in Texas.
And he said, Oh, I'm meeting you today. This is very exciting to meet you. And to also tell you some good news. Some other exciting good news today. I said, Okay, what is it?
He said today?
I put my son in American public school, said, Really? Why don't you put him in the toilet? He said, like, No, you didn't understand me. I put my son in American public school.
I said, I understand you.
And I think you understand me, but I'll tell you an Arabic. A Mom, why don't you put him in the toilet.
He just looked at me like I was crazy. He said why he said this. I said because it leaves, you could wash it off.
Because the public school in my country has degraded down deteriorated down to such a level. It's not fit to put children in anymore. And our warranty material.
Because we had schools that he could put his child in. But he was determined back home that looks so good. My son's in American public school.
The sad news is I was right. And I wish I would be wrong. About seven years later, after I moved up to Washington DC. The same brother had moved not very far from me.
He called me on the phone, I got to talk to you. Please come to my house immediately. I went and had a brother with me. And we went and on the way over. I was telling him the same story I just told you.
Same story. I just told him you know, when I met this guy, I told him put your kid in the toilets better in public school. When we got there. The brother give us the best hospitality. We sat on the floor, drink the coffee while we're sitting there. He said, Okay. Do you remember the first word who ever said to me seven years ago when you met me? I said, Yeah, I do very well. I was just telling him. I'm surprised you remember? He said, Well, you were wrong. I said, Okay. Actually, I'm glad I've been wrong before. He said, No, you were really wrong. I said, Okay. He said, You should have told me it's 10 times better to put them in a toilet than to put them in the school.
I've lost my son. What should I say? Or should I know?
He started crying. We talked about it, we found many problems. Most of them related to the fact that the father just didn't get it in his mind. You can't do it like that. It's Graham has a prescribed way for everything. Everything.
And if you follow it, it will work. If you don't, you're on your own yes or no. That makes sense.
All right. How do we raise our children? Let's start with that.
First of all, from the time they're born, does Islam tell us what to do when they're born. And then there's certain Few days later that we take the hair of the head and weigh it, cut it, weigh it and give an equal amount of charity of silver. The point isn't about the fix. The point is to look and ask what am I supposed to be doing? When my child is born? What am I supposed to be doing? And don't we have a celebration?
We have a celebration where we bring the people and feed them and tell them Oh, we have a child who was born here.
But we find the date people are ignoring that. Instead, we celebrate their birthday.
Well, we told to celebrate their birthday. No, we were told to celebrate their birth. Did we do that? No.
Then we wonder why there's a problem later. And as long as you're going to celebrate the birthday, boy, you got to bring a cake. You gotta have ice cream. You got to have candles.
Nevermind that those candles are coming from another religion. But you didn't know that. So it doesn't really matter, does it?
What's happening to us?
What's happening to us? The way that we raise our children up, and they're not seeing us? And when they do see us, we're not really following Islam? How are we going to explain that on the day of judgment? Do you expect that you could just drop your children off at a Muslim school? In the morning, pick them up in the afternoon? and magically, they're going to be the model Muslim?
Is this really what you think? The Islamic international school here is probably one of the best Muslim schools on the planet, especially for those who have the English language and are trying to learn, I'm serious. But at the same time, if you really thought that's all it takes, how how can you think that you are responsible for your own children? The teachers are there to give them some message. But it's up to you to really follow through when they come home every day, what was the last time you sat with children help them with the homework? When? When was the last time you sat with them and just listen to them talk about their day? No, you're too busy talking about your day.
Or even worse, too busy watching television. Of course, if they're watching piece TV, that's different.
We'll make that exception immediately. But even piece TV, it has some good things. But Thirdly, you wouldn't leave your child parked in front of that television set all day long.
This isn't reality, this conference that we're holding right now, it is so important for us to have this chance to be with each other and talk and share questions and answers, especially when Dr. zakra comes out and really give you some good answers. But still, that's not our dean. If you just live all year long for the next conference, that's not our dean.
Our Dean is what some people said it's our religion. These are people that don't understand Arabic.
Or else they don't understand English, or both.
Deen is your way of life. Everybody has a Deen. Not everybody has a religion.
D is all encompassing. You have religion inside of Dean. There is a place inside of Dean for religion for worship for a Baba. But everything for the Muslim is Dean yes or no. We have to think about it. And to raise these children properly, we've got to plant the seeds the right way. Let me give you an example. Another time in Maryland. I was given a talk. And I know the brothers. They're pretty good. And we're friendly with each other. And so when I tease them, they understand where I'm coming from. They don't see it as I'm really picking on anybody. So we had a father Sunday.
Somebody made up an idea, Father Sunday. I don't know why, but they did. And it's on Sunday. Anyhow, so we've got the fathers, we got the sons, everybody's I don't know why we didn't have any daughters. But whatever.
Then what would they're all sitting there waiting for my talk. I said before we get started. Can I ask you a question? Yeah. Who will sell me their son?
Who will sell me their son?
What's he talking about?
Okay, how much is your son worth to you? Like?
There's no amount of money? No, your son, you got a price on it? No way.
$100 Oh, $1,000. A million dollars. No, no, no. How much? Tell me the price. And they will never sell my son. And so and so you know, and the kids are looking at Dad, like, what's this guy talking about? Then I said, Okay. How many of you took a part time job? How many of you worked
late at night for extra money? Or you worked on Saturday or Sunday when the kids were home? How many of you you did that?
I said and who took care of your children while you're working?
Some babysitter or they're old enough to take care of themselves. They don't need anybody. They're eight years old. They're 10 years old. They don't need anything. Yeah, they're okay. We only left him about eight or nine hours. No big deal. We left food on the stove there. Okay. And I told him how much did you get?
$20 25 5050 100 and 100 125 go out here and 151 5175 because what you did your option your kids off the same way. Whatever money you
You made that how much you sold them for. Because when you were not with them you were not living up to your responsibility
as a parent, the amount that was given to you by a law you say yeah, but I needed the money for my family, your family looks to me like you got a new Rolex on your arm What's that got to do with your family?
There's me like you got a new game boys. Over here you got a new computer over there, putting new tires on the car, jazzing up deaths and died and, and worst of all making payments on the house you got on Reba. Oh, do Bella in all in the name of my family. If you really want to be with your family, you will find a way to do it. And you put them first instead of this dunya.
Go back and look at it again and think think
Allah said Oh, you who believe save yourself and your family from a fire of fire.
That even the stones are on fire. Even the people in it are on fire.
This is from the Quran. Allah is not joking. He's telling you something serious.
Let's make a commitment. A serious commitment. Starting right now Tonight, we're going to look at our children in a whole different light.
There are responsibilities.
They are a trust from along.
And they are helpless without us. They're totally completely unable to do this for themselves. They don't know what they need. Children don't know the best thing for themselves. When you let a child tell you what they need. What in the world are you thinking about? Do you let the children go pick out your clothes for you?
Do you let the children tell you what to eat?
It's for sure. It's for sure. In his mom, the law. He's going to ask us about how we raise these children. Now, okay, no, we made a commitment. We're going to stay home with him. But what are we going to do? Well, you sit on the couch with them while they watch TV?
No, what's the benefit there? Or you'll take them to the park and they can watch you play a game? No. Every single family has a different situation and I won't pretend to be able to tell you how to do yours. But I will tell you that there's a way in Islam, for you to have at least enough time to give them certain valuable information they need and you have good information. Allah has blessed you to be a Muslim. Allah has given you something that he calls not
a big name of Allah subhanho wa Taala is Islam and the Lord told us how important it is. out yo molek now to learn from dinner comm we're at mum to alikoum net magic, are ready to local Muslim Medina, the word nepotism. This is a large possessive of this word that Allah has given you the best of his favors, which is Islam.
And what about he Daya? All of us everyday was saying if Dena Serato must be king. That is the the straight way Allah is guiding us. We're turning it down. He's offering it to us every day. When was the last time you prayed fudger in the masjid. If the answer is this morning,
a lot of a lot I mean
hamdulillah I'm proud of you. And then you came home
and sat with your children and read Quran with them. Yeah.
Or maybe you even took your children to the masjid. And after find your you sat right there with a teacher and help them learn Quran. Yeah.
Well, not exactly.
I'm kind of busy. You know, I'm going to tell you about somebody that you know, at least you know about him.
I know a person that's so busy, really busy. The man doesn't sleep.
Except maybe sitting up in the airplane. or sitting up in a vehicle while we're traveling to another place. I've traveled with him in a lot of places and seeing how he operates. The man doesn't know how to sleep. He's too busy running a television channel or school.
And for sure, these conferences that you're at right now.
You know who I'm talking about. There's no way you're I could even begin to touch one of these days. We couldn't do it. We'd have to go to the hospital to recuperate for one day.
Yet this man has time for his family.
He has time for
His children, I know because I've been with them. And I've seen it, he's got the time, and he's got something else from them, he has their respect their full respect. Why? Well, of course, it's from a law, it's a gift, no doubt. But it's something, something that he has put himself in position to receive. And you and I are not doing that if we're not following Islam.
And there are a lot of other people that aren't famous that we don't know them. They also they also are doing a lot of work,
a lot of work
and still finding time to secure their family. And that's what we have to find something called armies on, which is a balance of balance.
Now, probably, if you knew my story, you'd say, well, that's the most unbalanced guy in the world, then you'd be right.
But somehow, I still managed to find at least some time each day for my kids. Even when I traveled, I used to take them with me.
Even when we were far away from home, we still found time to sit with our core on, go over some hobbies. I'm sure not the best one for Koran recitation, and certainly not the best for Arabic. But I'm the one that Allah gave them.
So I figured along wants me to try to do it. And we did.
You can do it. You can do it. If Allah wills, but you got to try brother, and sisters, this is your real job. These children are going to be directly really a reproduction of you what you do, they'll be just like you, and they're going to be a product of what you show them. Remember the hoodies. I'll repeat it again, as I'm winding this up and remind you again, the Hadith of the Prophet SAW Islam, when he told us every child is born on the fitrah
of all Islam
is already born, every child, I don't care if the parents are Hindu, Buddhist, Christian, Jewish, doesn't matter. Pretend Muslim, it doesn't matter. The child is born, what innocent. We're not saying Islam from standpoint the child is doing a lot. We're saying that they're on the fitrah of what Islam is about being innocent, being pure, being totally and completely dependent on a law.
The child is in that condition yes or no.
And for us, we know that if any of these children, these babies die,
they go straight to paradise.
I don't care what the religion of the parents was, the child at least is going to paradise. And they're in paradise asking a law or law let my parents be with me or law that my parents would be with me. So Panama.
But what are we going to do with these beautiful, innocent?
children? What are we going to do with them?
And before I walk off this one little piece of advice that I always like to give our youth want to talk to the youth for just a minute.
Anybody who has a father or a mother,
basically all of us think about what I'm going to say.
In Islam, we learned a very valuable lesson about our parents didn't know
how much rights do our parents have on us?
Did they have any rights? Or do we just like okay, I'm 18 now I've had it with new people goodbye. I'm 21 I don't need to hear your stuff. I heard it. I'm on my own. That's Western mentality. They walk out the door many of them never come back. Except to borrow money or a place to stay. I'm asking you masking
do the parents have rights in Islam? What is the resource first
somebody went to him and they said after a law Alliance big rights on you to worship him along without any partners and His Messenger the Prophet Muslim has rights on you that you follow Him and everything but if you don't then align gonna love you.
As the law said about the prophet SAW some in the Quran Chapter Three, verse 31. And he made it very clear because he said cool St. Gallen gundrum. Jo e buena love it daddy oni como la jolla,
la hoga for him, say to them all Mohammed, when they say I love Allah, Allah loves me, you know, people I love a lot. When they say that, tell them if you really love a law, follow me, Prophet Muhammad. Then Allah will love you and he'll forgive you.
Your sins because he is the forgiver. No mercy.
So Allah and His Messenger have the biggest rights. But after, and this is what the companion was asking, after online is messenger, who has the most rights on me. And you'll be able to hear the lady said all the way back from the sister section, after Yvonne is messenger, who as most writes on me said, Your,
your mother, and then your mother, and then
your mother, and then
then your father.
They didn't even need a microphone, you could hear good. Yeah.
Of course, partly, they're reminding you,
your mother, your mother, your mother, and then your father.
Why is this important to know if we're talking about tarbiyah?
Well, because if you do not give your parents their right,
guess what? Your children are not going to give you your rights either.
how you treat your parents, a law sukawati, Allah is going to give you children to treat you the same way. wants you to think about that. I'm looking into the audience, the father of Dr. Sacra night, and I have seen them in their family situation. And I see the respect being given to the Father. And then I see the respect of the son being given to his father the same way, how this is from a law.
At the same time, I've been in homes where I've seen disrespect given to the elder, and then the child disrespecting them the same way. Have you seen it? Do you know what I'm talking about? Now, all you got to do is just ask yourself a question. How do I want to be treated?
As a parent, how do I want to be treated, I don't care if you're 15 years old, I don't care if you're eight years old, you still can understand what I'm telling you how you treat your parents today, look out.
Because you can expect the same thing back from your own children in a very short time. It's very critical that you and I realized the only way we're going to ever raise up these champions. We want them to be champions, we want them to get out there and do good. And we want them to be the best examples. There's Muslim, we want to be the best doctors, the best engineers, the best professors, the best business people, we want our children to be the best. Of course, I'm putting an emphasis on Islam, I want to see our children, the scholars of Islam, Hafiz or the Quran, I want to see them really get involved in what our religion is teaching.
But at the same time, I realized that there is very material matter that we have to deal with. But don't let either one take you away.
And then this final last couple seconds, I want to talk about the one who gets too involved in religion, to take care of his family. Because usually people like me are telling you to get into the religion get more involved in llll Allah go to the masjid read the Quran sitting in circles of learning rrr but if it takes you away from your responsibility, your family it's still a problem, isn't it? There is a balance. We are the oma didn't watch it. What is what's the mean? balance. There is of course time for Salah time for learning Quran, time for being with the brothers in the masjid. But when we pick up and leave and don't come back for days at a time, weeks at a time, now
when we are there, we're trying to make up for the last time, you're always out doing my preaching or whatever. And now I don't have time for my family, I have to double up on my work. I still have ignored the thing that I was commanded to do, above all other things. And that's the treatment of other people. Earlier today, we heard a beautiful talk about dignity, and how important dignity is.
And this is the same. Give your children dignity by spending your time with them.
And then when somebody asks you, how much are your children worth? You say to them, My children are worth my time. That's what they're worth.
And you can't give that to them only I can
spend a little bit more time with those children.
You'll be glad you did. Allow love you for that. Your children will respect you for that. And most important on the Day of Judgment, you will have at least tried your best. And hopefully, you won't have to be calling me or Dr. Zack or some of the other teachers out here and begging them to come help you
Deal with a problem that you could have avoided a long time ago, just by spending your time. And really that's it
isn't it was too simple, didn't really need me to come out here and tell you, it was right in front of you. But that's what's beautiful about Islam. It is simple. And it is right in front of all of us
who are walk off. Now I want to make a prayer, a prayer of supplication to a law, or me for my family, for your family, for all the future generations of all the Muslims. I pray Actually, I beg I beg along that He will guide them, guide us, guide us to be the best Muslims we can be. And whatever we do. I mean,
we ask Allah Vega law, to keep our children and our families and us a way far away from that Hellfire army.
We asked the love for the best of this life and the best of the next life and save us from that punishment of the Fire. Rabbana actually not be doing your house and what military has done. What Trina doesn't know more on me. And I'll have a lot of galantamine who allowed
Does that Colombo Kira chef use of eSpares for the truly inspiring talk, was Salam Alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuhu