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Unspoken Addiction to Imagery

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Wael Ibrahim

Channel: Wael Ibrahim

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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Man Rahim al hamdu Lillah wa salatu salam ala rasulillah he saw online

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probably shortly saw that he was silly Mr. de la la for that Emily's any of our poly. So the Chanukah la Mulana Illa Allah antenna in Mecca Antara Hakeem

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This is your brother way Rahim recording or live for sure to hear Brahim

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hairbrained.com I just wanted to get a confirmation if everything is is okay for the people online charlo Tyler

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I got the confirmation that we are online and hungry last let's start in sha Allah to Allah,

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unspoken addiction,

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the battling of the visual imagery online. And I want to give you the background of why I was interested to actually delve into this particular topic. So I was it was about 12 or 13 years ago, when I received a phone call from a brother who was at that time as young as 18.

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And that brothers had a law, talk to me and he wanted to kill himself, he wanted to commit suicide. And when I requested for more details about the reason he said that he was addicted to bad imagery, inappropriate imagery, imagery of men and women who appear on screen in a manner that's not suitable that is not acceptable, that displays a loss of power.

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And to be honest, when I heard this, the first time I laughed at the brother, I was like, you know, making fun and I was like, come on these things are not addictive, are you kidding is addictive. That was my first reaction, but but it hits me because I went back in the 90s with my memories. And I remember those days when

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our friends ourselves in a certain

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you know period of our time, we were also hooked on these addictive content. And so Pamela Levine back in the days these content were existed on VHS tapes on magazines, it was not as available as today it was not as accessible as today yet, even then, back in the days with static pictures.

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These images have had big impact massive impact on our brain, on our lives on our attitude and so on. So, we are going to talk about it today in sha Allah to Allah and I believe the you have the slides available on the website and I believe that you can actually access it as you please. So, let us inshallah I will be guiding you to

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direct you from time to time to to have a look at particular slides and discusses in short law to Allah. But let us talk first because

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the title of this talk is unspoken addiction. So let us define addiction first. So we can all be on the same page and chart Long Island. So addiction is defined by the expert as actually a brain disease.

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You see something is something really serious. It's something that can change your chemistry, the chemistry of your brain, the structure of your very own brain. In fact, according to a study by Max Planck Institute, they actually said that

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those imagery, those inappropriate imagery can actually have a lasting impact on your brain to an extent that the very structure of it would change physically. And actually it would shrink by four plus percent of its original size, the frontal lobes. I was in Indonesia, I think,

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a couple of months ago. And so part a lot of the I met a sister by the name of Aly raisman. And erisman had replicated at Cambridge University study where they have scanned the brain of those people who are hooked on these images

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and they have found that the size of the from the

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frontal lobe or the prefrontal cortex would shrink by four plus percent of its original science, leading or resulting in lack of motivation, lack of focus, lack of memory, can you imagine, no way to power, all of these are the result of looking at these images. In fact, various studies, various other studies have shown that looking at these images have the same impact on the brain, just like cocaine and heroin, just like hard drugs. So it's very, very serious

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brain disease, the brain is changing. Are you kidding me pictures can do that. That's what science and neuroscience are telling us today. What's what is sad about the story is that,

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that the media, which I call inappropriate media, is actually encouraging this evil, and is promoting it

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as the norm. But before getting into this, I wanted to also

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remind you of a very important fact about our brain very, very, very interesting thing about our brain, that every time you are behaving in a manner, in a particular manner, whether the you're eating something, or maybe exercising or putting on a particular scent of perfume. And if you like that activity, and if you repeated it in a

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in a in a

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repetitive manner, then immediately a pathway in your brain is created for that particular activity, to remind you to repeat that activity, and that's called the reward pathway. And the problem with that is that if the thing that you are repeating, if it is really aggressive in nature,

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it is very, very difficult to reverse the situation and go back to its original state. And this is what the the scholars and the neuroscientists of that field have actually discovered, about looking at inappropriate imagery, imagery of new new people, people who are doing certain activities online, what I added, let me Allah protect us all, that could lead to such an addiction.

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And I want to, I want to direct your attention also to,

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to the

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one of the slides,

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a man by the name of Nicolas Ting, timber Jin,

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who won the Nobel Prize in the 1970s, he had this beautiful, interesting experiment, it's called the super normal stimulus, super normal stimulus, very fancy name. It's actually talking about how the media sometimes when we presented things in a bigger and greater manner, it actually affect on our behavior and looking at the usual and normal everyday normal activities.

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And he did the something he observed something very, very interesting. He observed butterflies, the life of certain butterflies in certain regions. And, and he saw how the male flowers and butterflies are attracted to the female butterflies. And then he took pictures of those butterflies. And then he created a fake one, a cardboard butterfly wings, but he made them bigger, and he made them brighter, and he hang them somewhere near those male butterflies. And to his astonishment, he found that actually, the male butterflies became attracted to the fake paper, butterflies, and the even ignored the real females, butterflies. And this is what the bad imagery online could lead to on the long run

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can make you what I asked me a lot protectors, it can make you leave the real, your own wife, your own spouse, your own real life partner and go to pixels and go to images that you can't even touch you can even interact with. That's the danger of these imagery. And as I mentioned earlier, what is what is sad about the matter is that even the media people who owns these channels are unfortunately marketing these things as if it is the norm. If we go into

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The slides in slide number

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eight online where you see the promotion of cocaine to eight. Back in the days, they were producing such a heavy substance that could actually lead to the death of a person cocaine, they didn't know back then perhaps the danger of the cocaine, but signs are catching up, they started catching up until the substance was

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banned. And then the next slide you see how they're promoting beer for pregnant mothers for example, or smoking

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you know, particular brand worn you know, smoked by a doctor by very, very respectful person in the community, very, you know, respected profession. So they are marketing the evil in order to attract the attention of the masses. So the message is this this is just an introduction for you all to understand. To Be careful of what you're actually viewing the Prophet Muhammad SAW Selim spoke about that the Quran speaker spoke spoke about that in various ways. A loss of cannot ascend up and tell to the believing men and unbelieving woman it is mentioned put a little mini nail do min Abba sorry him tell to the believing men to lower the gate to lower the gaze. Holy moly Nina What do men have a

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sorry my father Fujifilm as a result of lowering the gaze of lost fat and I mentioned operand that your private parts will be protected. Holy moly, Nina will domon Abba sorry him or follow Fujifilm Delta, the believing men to lower the gaze and to protect their private parts. And the same command is given also to females to ladies are called Illuminati dynamin busara hiner or frogner, Fujian and tilt to the believing women to lower their gaze as a result, Allah subhanaw taala would protect their private part. So the gaze is very, very important my brothers and sisters in Islam, it is, you know, the human cameras that can bring all these imagery into our brain and store it for so long

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time. And science or neuroscience in particular told us

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that actually, our brain can rewire itself, it can go back to its original state. If you mess it up, it can go back. But the process of rewiring the brain, the brain is also slow, it takes too long. to reverse the situation, there is hope. But it takes too long. So since this talk is meant for young men and woman out there, you don't have to go through that path. You don't have to go through this hassle. Because I have been dealing with so many people in the past 10 years in particular who are badly addicted to these images, and it's really taking their best years of their lives, it is wasting a lot of the times it's affecting their studies affecting their sleep. So you don't have to

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take that path. in Charlotte, try to avoid it as quickly as you can inshallah, as soon as possible.

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There are four A's I call the four A's of the Internet, and why the Internet has become so addictive. As I mentioned earlier, back in the days, those content we you know, people used to access them through magazines and VHS tapes. And those who don't know what VHS tape just search the words on the Google search bar and you will see that very massive tape that we used to insert into a V

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VHS you know, video tape player. And that has to be connected to a big TV and in the living room. So it was very difficult to even insert that tape and watch it in front of the family. Of course, you'd have to wait for the right moment. But nowadays with the help of smartphones, you can access these wherever you are with the access with the help of the internet, you can access these content, you know, anytime, at will,

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behind closed doors on your bed at any given time. That's why I call the four eight of the four days of the internet. Why Internet has become so addictive. Number one, accessibility as we mentioned, it is accessible at will even you know at sur you know

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Some, some times ago, people used to actually go and rent those tapes like, you know, you don't have to

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do some people, some, some people will exchange them, some people will rent them. In order for you to watch these content, it will take you really know a plan in order for you to get them into your reach. Number two, affordability. It's very cheap. It's actually free. Now, I want to tell you something that during the lockdown,

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one of the most popular website of that nature, they have actually released a review, they said that in the year 2019 alone, 42,000,000,040 2 billion visits had occurred on the website, can you imagine we are only you know, 7 billion on planet earth 42 billion visits.

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In the year 2019. Alone, it's equivalent to 115 million visits a day, it is the population it's equivalent to the population of Poland, Australia, and Canada combined.

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I just want you to imagine that.

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And this website have opened that premium account free for the public during the lockdown stage during COVID-19.

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So it's it's free, that that made the the addiction even escalates, because it's available. It's affordable. And number three, number three, and this is what the people sometimes don't understand. They think it's anonymous. They think that when you are behind closed doors, watching these websites, they think that they are alone, they're not being watched. Do you know that these websites actually immediately as soon as you click those websites, immediately your IP is saved on the server?

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Do you know that you can be actually watched via webcam and can be recorded while you're enjoying these images on adebola? May Allah protect us all? There was a client of mine who told me that actually,

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he was contacted one day and someone recorded him

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without his permission without his knowledge. And he was you know, it's changing conversation during the conversation with someone on the other line. And he didn't know what's going on later on an hour later. So panel law

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you will was contacted again. And that person told him that either you pay me $200,000 or these images will be sent to your family members

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will expose you

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so you can so don't think that you're alone when you're on these websites may have lost planet Allah protect us all. And number four, why it is addictive. It is because it is so aggressive. The aggression in recent time in these productions or either Bella had made the addiction escalates, because it's not really what's happened. What happens in real life.

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What happens in those in those images never happen in real life.

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And our brain craves novelty. Our brain craves, you know, fantasy. I always tell you tell story during my lectures about the

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how back in the days, I used to love Indian movies. So Indian movies were my favorite. And one time I was watching that movie and it was very, very dramatic. You know, the father is trying to protect his wife from you know, some

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attack and he wanted to protect her and his baby infant. And so he brought a horse and he mounted his wife on it. And he gave her the son and before getting the infant to his wife, he took a knife and he made a mark on the chest of the son saying his name with what with a knife. And the scene was so dramatic The music was so you know, loud in the blood was coming out of the baby's chest. Can you imagine all of these happening? You know at once.

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And so panel of him that night after I watched that movie, I woke up early morning, and I went to the bathroom and I took a razor, the razor of my you know, one of my razor the razor My father used to have and I started actually hurting myself and I start writing those letters on my

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chest, and I bear the pain. And I didn't realize the pain I didn't feel the pain except after later on. So this is this was one example of a crazy young boy when when I used to watch these movies, but the effect on our brain on our behavior, as a result of these images is real.

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four C's of addiction, I want to talk to them. And as I speak in Charlotte, Allah, I want you to look at your life on on social media on gaming on these images, and try to ask yourself, Am I really addicted? Have I really reached that level yet? Or am I safe? Should I reach out for help? Or where do I stand, you have to evaluate your your your situation right now. Otherwise, it might be very, very difficult for you to get back and make a U turn when you reach a certain age. So this is what you need to understand now. So what are the four C's of addiction? Now to evaluate whether you are addicted or not, you have to look for those, or one of those C's, number one, the continue of the

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use of that particular, you know,

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content, or images, or even substance for that matter, despite negative consequences, like you started to fail in your tests, you started to feel that you're not focused anymore in school, you started to feel that you are, you know, trying to be on these websites, even though you have some important tasks to finish,

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you got called by your parents, and you got punished and you still, you know, insist on going back again and again into these websites. So you have to see if you are in this category or not continue of use despite negative consequences. Number two, the compulsion, you you become compelled now, you're pushed into these websites against your will. So at first you're enjoying it, now you're not enjoying it, and you're not enjoying it anymore. But you are going into it by a compulsion, something like against your will. Number three inability to control your action,

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the inability to control your action. So

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going to these websites will either be MLS printout protectors are is also linked to other activities, you know, self pleasuring is one of them. Or even worse, you you go and try to act out what you have seen. And this is what we have seen in recent days. It's happening frequently now and faster than ever before, because of these productions. So you start going on leaving the screens and going into real life activities which are harmful, which can lead to other diseases. What can you imagine an image could lead to all of these? Yes, what why, and that's why the media is one of the most powerful tools used by governments and agencies in order to convince you with their products to

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convince you the ideas all over the US is images

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over the US is images just done cleverly, so that you can be hooked on that message. So yes, image, our images are very, very powerful.

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And letter four is craving is craving to go back again and again, to repeat the same action. So these are the four C's of addiction. And these can be applied to any sort of addiction, whether substance or behavior. So you have to be very, very careful if you are already, you know, in any of these stages, seek help. My brothers and sisters seek help. And this is something that I wanted to advise especially young men and woman. I know sometimes it's very hard for you at that age, to go and confess something like that. But if you waited, as we mentioned, if you waited longer, it's going to be more complicated. It's going to be more complicated and you need to reach out to those

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who are handler opening up their arms for you like you know, trusted, supportive teachers, supportive parents, siblings who are just, you know, close to you those who are trusted people, you need to reach out to them and seek for help. Now if you want to delve even

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deeper regarding how to really identify whether you're addicted or not, and listen to the following chart law so how to tell if you are addicted. Now we know the general understanding

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of how our brain work, the pathways that are created for our addictions,

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the four A's of Internet, and how internet became very accessible, accessible, affordable,

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aggressive in nature, and so on, and the four C's of addiction, those those things that you can, that can grab you back again and again into the same action. And let's continue it continue to have the action despite the negative consequences, compulsion of the use, inability to control your behavior, and the craving to the action again and again. Now how to tell if you are addicted to these elements. May Allah protect us all. Number one, the secrecy of the action.

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You see, the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam said, sin, the definition of sin is that you will do that action and you will hate others to see it. And good deeds is that which will not will please your heart and you wouldn't mind if somebody is some, some people around you have seen it. That's the definition of sin and good deed according to the Prophet sallallahu sallam, once it is a sin, you don't want people to see it.

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So the secrecy of the action is an indication that you are hooked on that particular act, and you don't want anyone else to know about it. And you start denying, you know, within yourself you're battling, is it really a problem or not? So and and that stage sometimes takes long, long time, the brother that I was referring to in the beginning, he was addicted already for seven years before coming over talking to me seven years.

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He was doing that act in secret for seven years, and he was 18 years. And some of the statistics are scary that young young people are actually the majority of people who are on these websites young people aged 11 to 1811 to 18 out of the largest age group who access these particular websites and these imagery May Allah spirit Allah protect the soul.

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So the Prophet Muhammad SAW Selim said the righteousness is in good character and wrongdoing is that which wavers are Weaver's in your soul and which you dislike people to know about it. Last part, that little cylinder or Aeneas, for now, I mean, a nasty one is the one I mean a lot You are now home, there are certain people who conceal the sense from people, but they do not consider it from a loss of habitat. So the height from their parents, the height from the siblings, the height from friend, from the friends and neighbors, the height, they are the sense from all the people around them. But when it comes to a Lost Planet, Allah, they don't hide it. They don't hide the data. They

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just they know that Allah subhanaw taala is with them Ulsan Lockwood and the hide from Allah while he is with them, wherever they are,

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wherever they are, there was

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a client of mine panel was talking to me and he said that he cried over the phone. And I was like, why are you crying? He said, I was watching what I was watching behind closed doors, and I made sure that every door every window is locked. And so panela as he was in a very shameful position, his room, the door was popped open strongly. And he froze. You couldn't even change any of what was he doing? But no one talked after wine. And as he turned, he found no one. He rushed back here, you know, to the door behind him. And he checked who is there who opened the door. No one was there. And he discovered actually, what opened the doors was the wind. It was a windy day, and the knob was a

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little bit broken. And the wind pop the door open. There was no one no one had seen him so I said right handler nobody caught you in the act. He said no but I'm not crying because of this. I am crying because I remember that. A Lost Planet Allah was watching all the time. And they got scared from the wind. I got scared from the people and I did escape from a law the controller of people the controller of the wind so panel line have been How many years have you been doing this wrong?

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Hiding from people why knowing for sure that Allah subhanaw taala is over watching you. So this is one of the sure signs that perhaps you are on the path of addiction, procrastination, delaying important tasks.

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For the sake of those images, like you have a test, this brother was saying that I had a test at 8am back in the days, and he was on those websites on till seven in the morning,

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like not even an hour to sit and review, you know, for his test. So, yes, those images are very captivating and can bring you away from what is necessary from your important tasks. And number three, and this is this is

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this is now a sure sign for anyone who's watching, I want you to be very careful and pay attention imagining yourself having you know,

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sexual

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activities with someone that perhaps you know, someone that you have seen or met, imagining yourself into those positions, trying to act out those moves that you have seen in those films with others in your brain imagination. So, this is a sure sign, sometimes back in the days I remember we used to read novels in one reading we imagine that we are the heroes and we are the those people in those characters in the book similarly,

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those now those those visuals are really can actually make you later on, when you interact with even your sisters with your neighbors with your cousins, you start imagining them in those positions, this is how these imagery can change and alter your behavior. So, may Allah subhanaw taala protect us all a male loss to Allah make us Yanni

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understand these images

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are destructive. And as a result, parents out there who can you know,

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start inshallah to Allah, perhaps considering

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downloading those software's that can block these activities, start learning about you know, ease safety and reach out to experts to protect the children from falling prey into these

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images. While I may have lost planet Allah protect us all. And there was, I think I, I included, repeated some of the slides twice. But I was I was hoping to speak about few remedies. And if someone wanted to get rid of these addictions, what can he do and so on so on shallow will spend few minutes on this, and then inshallah we'll open the floor for question and answer. So if you wish to create a lasting impact on yourself lasting positive impact on yourself and start to take that path of recovery and inshallah to Allah, avoid watching these things. Number one, my brothers and sisters, change your environment. So look around you, and see if the environment is conducive to

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learning conducive to a man driven lifestyle, conducive to sobriety, like if you are already been addicted and keep going again and again, if the environment is encouraging to do the same thing, again and again, you must change it and the environment here including online world, Facebook, friends, you know, the items that you're using and items in your room that reminds you of those activities, all these things must change. If you don't change your environment, you will never be able to change your behavior. The prophet SAW Selim, talk to us about the man who killed 99 souls. And, and and when he when he asked a man with a las pantallas gonna accept his repentance. One

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person told him no are you crazy Allah, Allah is not gonna accept your repentance. So he killed them as well and made the 100 and he because he was very sincere and really insisting on changing he went to another scholar and the scholar and look, this environment is so sick, you have to leave that environment it's not conducive to living a healthy life. And and as a result he left and Allah Subhana Allah accepted these repentance as a result. So you have to consider changing your environment.

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From now on in Charlottetown even myself I remember when I used to live in Hong Kong. I used to love eating those, you know, blueberry, yogurt and chai latte every morning every morning every morning but when I used to fly out from Hong Kong city and visit elsewhere, I would never even think of that type of breakfast. So panel

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Why because addiction is

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very linked directly linked to our environment. So when whenever we are in an environment that reminds us of our activities of our behavior, if it is positive Alhamdulillah, if it is negative, then change it and make the environment look better. inshallah. Second point also second tip is to create a system for your life that would help you to remain sober and, and help you to stay away from that which is displeasing to Allah Subhana Allah

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structure, your life boundaries, do's and don'ts on the top of what's Helen and what's haram already that we know you have to also come up with a list of things that you know, you will never go beyond in your life, otherwise, you will fall prey to these images, boundaries, like the lose relationship and interaction with the opposite gender. To what extent do you interact with a sister or with a boy? What do you say when you when you sit and interact in whether in a school campus setting or online and who are these online friends and the likes and the dislikes and whatnot, you have to understand that if you don't have a system in your life, you don't have boundaries at early on in

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your life, you will go for anything, you will go for anything. And that system has to be really very strict to be followed. I remember one of my teachers used to invite us a lot in his home. And one day, he invited us for dinner. And we didn't see any food. So it was very weird situation. But we didn't see any food we smell any any food and and then we told him chef, we are hungry. Where is where's the food? This is all you're hungry. Come on, come on. Come on with me. So he took us to the kitchen and say are the food is in the kitchen. So when we went to the kitchen, there was no food. There was no food. He just opened the fridge and we saw muscle a lot of food in the fridge. And you

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know, he was an Egyptian. I'm an Egyptian. And we just eat light, you know, dinner, we don't eat heavy stuff. So it was like cheese, eggs, pastrami and some olives and stuff like that. So he opened the fridge. And he told me Well, how many pieces of cheese Do you want me to cut for you? And I was like, come on, I grew up in a house where my father would say, Take whatever you want from the fridge and eat without permission, just whatever you want you. You know, generosity is expressed in those in those days in those cultures, generosity is expressed through food, feed the people, that's how generous we are. So I was like, Oh my God, my teacher is stingy. You know, he's counting how

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many pizza I'm going to eat. So I told him, okay, three. All right. How many eggs do you want? So right one. Okay, how many olives do you want? Three. So it was painful process everyone is holding an empty plate. Waiting in the shade is asking each of us How many? How many pieces how many pieces. Once the plates are full, we went out and we ate and we enjoy it. And when we wipe out the plates, he said Do you want more? Some friends say yes. Can I have more? Say Yes Come with me how many pieces again the same process was repeated Hanalei lovely. Years later,

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I made that same chair, may Allah bless him. And I told him gently remember when I visited you and he did this and it was very awkward. If you don't mind me asking, Why are you doing this? He said, because I have a system. I have a system, the food will never return back to the fridge. Once it is on your plate, it will never return back on the fridge and it will never be trashed. So whatever you take on your plate you must eat.

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That's why he was asking us how many pieces are you going to eat? Because you don't want to return anything back in the fridge and you don't want to trash because nobody's going to eat in your place. So panel law and and it hits me so I asked him like what shade but I grew up differently. Like you know, in a house where food is everywhere. There's no measure, we just open the fridge and eat wherever we want. You say that's your system. If that's your call, go and enjoy it but in my territory, you have to follow my system. That's how strict system is when it comes to viewing.

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And looking at that which is you know, pleasing to Las panatela you have to be very, very strict, and anyone within your territory should follow your system. So your friends when they are with you on on campus if you're a student or outside if you're hanging out with them, if they started fooling around and inviting you to do that which is wrong. Make it a point that you will not hang out with them if they follow their system. Once

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They're with you they must abide by your rules This is how important system is and of course the last point that I want to mention Charlotte Allah is implementation implement what you learn as soon as you can implement what you learn as quickly as possible once your environment is healthy once your system is strong implementation will follow easy as well implement those boundaries that you have decided for yourself I hope that this has given you an idea and Charles how dangerous images online are and and how responsible you should be as at a very very young age before it is too late before you fall prey to these images and those addictions May Allah protect us all I would like to

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thank shake your head running for the opportunity. I believe that there will be a platform for question answers. So if you have any questions and so a lot be viewing it through telegram chat a lot, either. There's a channel that was created.

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So I would be looking here in Charlotte either if there's any questions Bismillah

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I wanted to apologize first, for the delay. There was some issues on my phone and on my internet, so please forgive me for that does that last item?

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Okay.

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Okay, so there are some questions here. Is it known why the frontal lobes shrinks because of these photos? No, the the windy actually compare those imagery of the MRI scanning that we have. In Indonesia, the study that I have observed, I observed it firsthand, like I was with the people who came out that

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study, they said that when they compared those brains with the brains of cocaine addicts, they found it to be exactly the same, that the size of the frontal lobes have become smaller. And that's why as cocaine and heroin and these hard drugs damage the frontal lobes, so to the images of inappropriate, you know,

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people online, so we don't know the exact reason but it's happening. In fact, Dr. Donald Hilton, and your surgeon, he said, watching these images can damage the frontal lobe in a way that you cannot even imagine. And then he gave a picture that's very, very strange to even fathom. He said that,

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you know, have you seen people who have

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crashed their car into trees or into building face to face and their head usually would pump into the Hard Rock and the the rest of the hospital with a damaged frontal lobe? They say exactly these images have the same or similar impact on the brain. So it crashed them it break it, it makes it really dysfunctional.

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Why do people do this? In the first the questions are coming fast, most a lot of work like

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is it okay to masturbate without watching porn? You see, the scholars, the scholars have discussed this and the differ in some score differ among others in the ruling of, you know, self pleasuring to these images. But I take one opinion to be, you know, based on the research that we have now, I think masturbation is actually Haram is prohibited for the reason that Allah subhanaw taala mentioned in the Quran that the only form of sexual pleasure should be attainable through

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you know, marriage constitution.

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So Allah, Allah talked in sort of minutiae, about the characteristics of the believers, those successful believers in this dunya in the hereafter will levena homely Farrugia him half alone, and those who guard safeguard their private parts in Allah as well Jim, except with their spouses, they are not to be blind. So once you are with your spouse, inshallah halaal wife, the halaal husband, then enjoy these relationships for many butala adeleke. Anyone goes beyond that. But will Erica Homura do and those are the transgressors, those who have actually transgress bounds. Those who have transgress or limits you see, transgression of limits, in in between countries is an offense that

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could you could be shot if you course, cross any boundary without a visa. It can be shot.

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You know, from a far distance the punishment, the punishment will be severe. Similarly, this is this is the opinion that majority of the scholars have come up with that, self pleasuring whether to these bad images or not, is not acceptable. Some scholars said except if you are about to commit Zina the major sin of Xenon adebola, then in that situation only, perhaps the lesser of two evils will be accepted. But other than that, it's not acceptable.

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Why do people start doing this in the first place? curiosity, they say curiosity kills the cats. So people always are after, as I mentioned, people are always often new things. People are after novelty and fantasy and stories. We love stories. And this industry became so smart now in presenting their products, just like how food products are presented, they make you feel hungry, even though perhaps you have eaten something before some there are

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a piece of meat or a piece of steak or, you know, you see this just the picture if you like, oh, you're craving for that particular thing. So yeah, the the the result of marketing the item is what lead people to be activity.

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Just I'm trying to go back to the questions one by one.

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Yeah, so some people will be wanting to contact me in Charlottetown. And my email is well, at wel L dash ibrahim.com. Where l at where L dash ibrahim.com. I don't know if

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if I write on the chat box, will it reach to you guys? I'm not sure. Is this the case at the end? Can you confirm?

00:46:59--> 00:47:06

So yes, well at y L. Dash ibraheem.com is my email address. You can reach me in Charlottetown for any advice or for any help.

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Some people are asking still about masturbation and self pleasuring and what are the effects of self pleasuring? You know, if you went on the internet, you'll see that some people are actually talking about the benefits of masturbation and it's healthy and so on. But actually lately, there are a lot of studies that have confirmed that these acts could actually lead to what is known now as erectile dysfunction, or porn induced erectile dysfunction. So self pleasuring,

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as that's associated with watching these images could lead to a scientific medical condition called porn induced erectile dysfunction where a male in particular wouldn't be able to function sexually with his spouse with his real life partner in the future, because these images conditioned the brain that sexual pleasure is attainable through pixels and screens. So this is one of the most terrible effects that masturbation could lead to.

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Some people are asking like, are you rich? Are you Indian? Neither inshallah.

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What does the frontal lobe control the frontal lobe as I mentioned earlier, it is responsible for your concentration for your focus for your willpower for your decision making.

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So once these are impaired, then it affects all these activities all of a sudden at once.

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Some people talking about my books, so inshallah, there are a few books that I've written on the subject one is called change. One is called beaded 50 plus shades of hope. One is called aware, find out who you are, that point the one displayed behind me here, and few others inshallah, inshallah, for those who attended this webinar in the lighterlife, you can email me at while at where industrybuying.com, you'll get some of my books for free in the lightoller.

00:49:26--> 00:49:59

If you have a bad habit with your eyes, meaning you can't control your gaze, some people are asking what to do. So, you know, our eyes, our hands, our legs are all controlled by this powerhouse of our body and that is the brain. So if you can train your brain to look elsewhere, on the long run in short or long data, your eyes will fall on that which is highlighted. In the beginning. It's difficult in the beginning will be hard, but as you train and insist to do what is right in short, long tail on the long run.

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habits will be formed and you will be able to do what is right you can read few books on how to form habits like the power of habits by Charles duhigg or the atomic habits by James clear the walk you through a systematic way of how to form your habits interesting theory that they have come up with and I found them to be very very useful in Sharla

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some people talking about the erotic and romance books and

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are they as damaging to the frontal lobes as the brain you'd be surprised to know that actually some scholars said that novels of that type can be more damaging to our frontal lobes in more than images more than visuals like movies and so on. And the reason is that I mentioned earlier that you will be imagining these

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situations and these stories as you please you're the director now, you can go beyond what is unnatural and what is normal. So because of your imagination imagination is so powerful and has a very very powerful impact on the brain.

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Can you please give the books the name of the books again? I think if

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if you can email me inshallah, I can give you the names and the books so you can just email me and I will give you the books. I hope that you guys have gotten the email which is well at well dash ibrahim.com

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is it helpful to watch these things with your wife? No, of course not. Would you allow your wife to see other people other men

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you know, with the hour in the hour and so on without clothes on? Will that be suitable? Of course it is not allowed at all. And I get that a lot and I get couples who complains that the husband sometimes push them to watch these things with them. It's absolutely prohibited and not allowed in Islam.

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Okay.

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All right. I think we will end it here in Charlotte. Allah does not come low Hydra. I think we have covered most of the questions. Once again. jazak la Hi, Ron chaitya here for the opportunity, and allowing me to be on your platform to speak a little bit about the impact and the danger of the unspoken addiction and we call it unspoken because it's very shameful. It causes that shame and dark phase in a person's life. And as a result, the fear telling anyone and the fear seeking help. So from where I am today, inshallah I'm inviting those people who are watching Chawla to reach out for help and I provide you already my email address here is also muscle accessible. So at any time if

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you need help in that area, just reach out and we will ensure a lot do our best to support you and help you to get rid of these addictions May Allah Spanish Allah protect you purify you and accept your good deeds. I mean, I mean I mean just suck long fire and so panic alarm or become the the shadow Allah Allah hotlanta Mr. Rocha on today as salaam alaikum warahmatullahi briquettes