Processing Pain – How To Stay Engaged with Palestine Without Emotional

Sarah Sultan


Channel: Sarah Sultan

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Institute's live webinar with a sister Sara salon and one of our instructors, who is also a licensed mental health counselor and a licensed professional counselor. Today we're going to be tackling the topic processing pain, how to stay engaged with Palestine without emotional burnout. Jessica for joining us, I know it's taking a second to get to all of your phones into your feed. So we'll let you guys join in. And please let us know where you're coming in from

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awesomesauce please let us know where you're coming in from and how you're doing Subhanallah it has been 54 days since the start of this current. I don't know what to call it anymore. Subhan Allah, there's so many words, most of the ones that you hear used on our medias are so inaccurate, but Alhamdulillah this has been, you know, subhanAllah such an educational and such a revitalizing experience for the Muslim community so that we get in touch with how to deal with times of difficulty and how to support our brothers and sisters and dealing with them what one of the most difficult experiences in the entire history of of the world. So I just have to look out to those who

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are making it live with us if you're coming in through the recording a cinematic and one welcome to you guys, as well please take a second to share this stream so that others can also benefit it's been a difficult time for everyone SubhanAllah. And it's unprecedented this level of access that we've had to some of the difficult news and the pictures and the imagery and just the information about the losses and the types of losses that are being experienced and Philistine right now. So I know it's difficult to hear and a lot of us have been consuming a lot more sad and negative news. And we have probably for a very long time. So we wanted to take a second here and another we tried

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to solve all the problems that we can, that we're equipped to in the Ummah through knowledge, they're giving you guys access to knowledge to making it a source of comfort, a source of guidance for you, and making it easy to access through these webinars and through these experiences that we host and Hamdulillah. One of the ways that we've been able to do that during this time is that we announced or we launched a few classes focused on some of the difficulties that people have been experiencing, and one of them was inside out outside in our professional our mental health course that's taught by professionals in the field as well as Dr. Or so the man, and we made it available

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for pay what you can so that everyone is able to access it around the globe. And so that you can benefit from this while you're trying to navigate these difficult feelings and emotions and frustrations and a lot more than that. And for that we had sister Cyrus Eldon, ready to join us today to address our topic and hamdulillah does that feel fair to those who have joined us and who have commented I see a couple of sometimes here in the chat, whether it was my wife who was not what I had with the love from Nigeria mother was just in Nigeria, have love for the one OMA conference and Stephanie's from London. It's a pleasure to have you with us. Once again, please continue to

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introduce yourselves here in the chat, my new sister Hausa, I'm going to be your host, but I'm going to be passing it off now to our beloved speaker, sister Sarah so that I sit down one on one with a lot, sister Sarah, how are you doing today? Why don't I go sit down when I would love to get to and hang the lamb happy to be here with you, Sister, have fun with all of you who are here listening to Zack and Lafayette for joining us. Baccala Sheikh is of course always amazing to have you whether it's live, whether it's some of the video reminders that you've been putting out on this topic. I know as a therapist, or you know, as a professional, this field it I'm sure it's been a really busy

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and a very difficult month for you. And I feel like a lot of the I think that a lot of the challenges that people are having are very repetitive. So I'm glad that we're in one space so that we can tackle how to approach this from an Islamic standpoint and how to stay engaged without burning out emotionally. So I'm excited to jump into this topic. I'll pass it off to you Inshallah, and we'll ask the questions at the end. This minute. Sounds good to Zack Allah.

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Mr. Lau salatu salam ala Rasulillah Juan, and he was a human winner. And my bad. Does that mean laughing to everybody for joining us today. This is obviously a very heavy and intense and overwhelming time for us all. And and just to be able to come together and talk about it and talk about ways to navigate it. So that we can navigate those emotions without burning out so that we can stay engaged and we can stay connected to the struggle of our brothers and sisters is just so important. So my LS passata reward all of you for being here, and being willing to stay engaged with this topic, despite how hard it is. And so I want to jump in, in sha Allah to first acknowledge, and

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this is a really important thing that we need to acknowledge is that what we're witnessing what we're seeing is not normal. We have never lived in a time when genocide has been broadcasted in the way that it has been seemed to us right through social media, where you're experiencing almost a constant live stream of atrocity after

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atrocity, violence after violence, trauma after trauma and pain after pain. And we have not in the history of our lives this reason anybody's lives

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ever been exposed to it unless you're living it. And so this vicarious trauma, which is what it's called, which is kind of like trauma by proxy, were witnessing, ever the trauma that our brothers and sisters in Palestine are going through, can lead to traumatic experiences for ourselves. And this is why we need to know how to navigate it, right. So you might be struggling with intrusive thoughts where you're trying to, you know, you might be doing something in your daily life. And suddenly, you get, you know, you get a sudden flashback to an image or a video that you've watched, you might be experiencing nightmares. I know that, my friends and I, when we spend time together,

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we're talking about the nighttime wake wake ups that that tend to happen, right? Where you wake up in the middle of the night, you wake up with anxiety, you're like, Where does this anxiety come from? And you realize it's because of this, right? It's because of everything that we're witnessing. And so it's so important to acknowledge when we're trying to navigate this, that this is not normal, that what we're seeing is not normal. And it should never be normal, that this happens to begin with. But the fact that we can witness it constantly, when in the past, there was one news cycle or one newspaper, or before then just a radio, right? And this was not, you know, like these types of

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situations were not broadcast in the broadcast in the way that they are now. And so just realize that this is not, this is not normal, and it doesn't, it should not feel normal. So whatever you're feeling right now, whether you're feeling grief, we all are anger, overwhelm, guilt, powerlessness, if you're feeling numb, like you can't feel anything. All of this makes sense. All of this makes sense. In the drastic situation that we're in in witnessing a genocide, witnessing apartheid, witnessing murder after murder, i All of this makes sense. All these emotions make sense. And so the first step is we're going to work on processing our emotions, and we're going to work on navigating

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this, this experience of witnessing so much so much atrocity and so much violence. The first thing is to acknowledge what you're going through.

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So if you're feeling overwhelmed echnology if your emotions are kind of all over the place, and they're more turbulent than usual, if your patience is thinner, if your energy is lower, acknowledge it. If you're struggling to go on as you normally would have when things are not normal, or if you're afraid for your safety because of increased Assam a phobia. If you're hurt because your friends haven't been speaking up or they don't share your perspective and your views on the situation. If you're experiencing survivor's guilt, in living your life of ease while others are suffering so much pain, if you just can't seem to feel anything anymore, and you feel numb

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echnology all of these responses are real, and they all make sense. And so acknowledging this is the first step to managing overwhelming feelings and it's an amazing way to allow us to use our difficulties to connect with ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada.

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You can't connect to Allah's pancetta with your emotion unless you acknowledge your emotion first, and difficult situations and intense emotions are an opportunity to turn to Allah span data He created us with these emotions for purpose. They are assigned and we take it as a sign for us to turn to Allah Pattaya and if we can turn to Allah subhanaw taala in that moment, it can be really transformative. And we see this in the beautiful example of the Prophet Nora Hannay salaam, Prophet Muhammad had given Dawa had been calling to, to his the message of Allah's PandaDoc for 950 years. Imagine the patience that it takes 950 years. And then one day he calls out to Allah. And he and

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Allah pancetta says in the Quran, he called out to Allah saying, I am helpless. So help me.

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I am helpless. So help me. He acknowledged the emotion of helplessness. And he pleaded to ALLAH SubhanA data to help him and so when we can acknowledge our emotion when we can acknowledge how we're feeling. This allows us to turn to Alas, panic data with that feeling just like the Prophet know how they said I'm did and to seek the help of Allah subhanaw taala. And in that process, we're connecting with him and he's the source of all strength. He's the source of all power, the source of all change. And so connecting with him in these moments when we feel powerless and helpless, is so empowering. And it's so transformative.

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The other thing to note, you know, that I think is important to acknowledge when we're talking about it.

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Emotions, you know, we're talking about the, the difficult emotions that we're experiencing. But it's also important to realize that in your life, you might still be experiencing positive emotions too.

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And that's okay. You can feel joy when you manage to achieve a goal that you worked hard toward. You can feel comfort when you hug your child, you can feel hopeful you can feel hopeful both in finding hope in the stories and strength of the amazing like the the experience and the examples of our brothers and sisters in Palestine in witnessing their faith and their resilience. You can find hope, and strength in that you can also find hope in your own tomorrow. All of these can exist in parallel.

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All of these can exist in parallel. Sometimes it can feel like a betrayal. To allow yourself to feel positive emotions can sometimes feel like a betrayal, making diet like the you know, the example of the prophet nor heist that I'm working illustrate that a saying I am helpless. So help me you might be experiencing in this moment, almost a feeling of selfishness in making diet for yourself. So if you're struggling to as you witness, all of these videos, all of these images, all of this news,

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and it is overwhelming and it's hard, you might struggle to Allah subhanaw taala to help you in that struggle.

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Because you might think to yourself, I'm not even experiencing it. I'm just witnessing it. So what right do I have to need help to get through this, they're the ones who need help. And they absolutely do need help, they absolutely need the support of Allah's pancetta. And so we don't stop making diet for them. And not but and simultaneously, do not limit the mercy or the capability of Allah's passata, whose mercy is limitless, and whose capability is limitless, you can still make dot for yourself for the people that you care about. For all of that while also making dot for your brothers and sisters, this exists in parallel. So don't limit don't limit that mercy and that

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capability of ALLAH SubhanA data.

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So when these emotions really hit us, when we're flooded with pain, when we're flooded with grief, when we're flooded with overwhelm, of the loss and pain that we're witnessing, what are practical tips that we can use to deal with this overload of emotion? How can we use this to navigate in this difficult time? Right? What are concrete things that we can do to navigate these emotions to process these emotions? And to keep going to keep moving forward and to keep staying engaged?

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So the first thing to to note is how are you thinking about this? How are you thinking about these, these feelings that are coming up for you? Right when these emotions flood, and they hit you so hard, realize that these emotions are a sign of the sense of humanity that you have, and they are a sign of your innate sense of justice.

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And that is a beautiful thing.

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That is a beautiful thing. And we need to be grateful for that. Because not everybody experiences that. Not everybody experiences, that sense of grief, and that sense of anger in seeing this injustice in this oppression. Be grateful that you're not one of those people. Right be grateful that you have that sense of humanity, and that you have this innate sense of justice. That is a beautiful thing.

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This is also these emotions are also a sign that you are a part of a powerful OMA that cares for one another and doesn't turn a blind guy to one another's pain, right the Prophet sallallahu Sallam he described the example of the believers in their love for one another in their mercy for one another in their compassion for one another as a body.

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And when any part of that body aches, then the whole body struggles with sleeplessness and fever.

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The fact that you feel these feelings shows that you are a manifestation of this hadith that you are a part of this body of this OMA and again that is a beautiful thing.

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And these emotions are also a sign of grief. And I remember hearing a definition of grief that I thought was very powerful and it really stuck with me.

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Which is that grief is simply love that has nowhere to go.

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Grief is a feeling of love that you have a you don't know where to put it. You don't know where to put it because that that place that you would have come

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vade that love to that person you would have conveyed that love to is no longer there.

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And so it reminded me this definition reminded me of the Hadith of the prophets SLM, where he said that none of you will believe until you love for your brother, what you love for yourself.

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We love our brothers and sisters that we've never met.

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When we see our Muslim brothers and sisters in Palestine, and Sudan, in, in China, in so many places of the world, who are suffering, we love them.

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And when they suffer, we grieve for them, because our love has no place to go. So allow these emotions to be a reminder to us that love for good for positive change for contribution, and allow these this sadness, these worries, these fears for our brothers and sisters, to propel us to do what we can for them,

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and to propel us toward a positive outlet for these emotions.

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So what are some positive outlets for these emotions? What are ways that we can take these feelings? Right? So now we've number one, acknowledge the feeling, right? We acknowledge, okay, this is what this is what I'm experiencing, as I'm witnessing this very important first step in managing in managing the our emotional response to this, that's the first step. The second step is, understand what is the meaning of that emotion. The meaning of that emotion is that I care, I care about humanity, I care about justice, I care about my brothers and sisters, I'm part of this OMA and this strong OMA

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and that I'm grieving for them, right, understand the meaning underneath these emotions, right? And now, the third step is now what do I do with them?

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What do I do with these emotions, that's going to be a positive outlet for them.

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So realize that everything that's happening is a test. We know, obviously, that this is a very obvious and one of the hardest tests that a person can go through what our brothers and sisters are enduring, right? They're enduring trauma upon trauma, pain upon like, I mean, it is unimaginable the amount of fear and difficulty they're going through unless somebody experiences it themselves, right. So that is their test. And it is an extremely, extremely difficult and intense test. But we are also being tested. And that's what we need to remember to, how are we being tested?

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We have to ask ourselves some questions. Like, what do I do when I see these images?

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What do I do? When I'm scrolling on Instagram? Or whatever platform you're on? And I see a video that moves me that makes me grieve that makes me angry that that's devastating, that I can't get out of my head. What do I do when I see this this image?

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Do I just scroll to the next one? When I feel uncomfortable? Do I just scroll to the next one, or even if I don't, I'm waiting, I'm waiting to see what else is going to happen?

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This is a test, what do we do when we see what we're seeing?

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The least that we need to be doing is at least after after each video or image or post that we see. To stop and make.we can't just be bystanders. We can't just scroll through scroll through from one image to the next to the next to the next. Without any change or without any proactive choice or action that we're going to be taking in that situation. We have to pause and do something meaningful. Whether it's making dot for this particular person you see on this video, or whether it's making is therefore asking forgiveness from Allah Pat data, because it's default brings so much so so many blessings. Right? We have to be doing something. Right. Another question to ask ourselves

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is What steps have I taken, no matter how small to create change? Sometimes we fool ourselves or shaitan fools us into thinking that small actions won't make a difference, right? Sharing a post isn't going to make a difference. Even though we've seen the power of that, or reaching out to your representative won't make a difference or donating to an organization. Well, there's no way that the money is going to get to Tesla right now. So we you know, there's no point in donating.

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Don't fool yourself into thinking that because our responsibility is not in the end result. Our responsibilities and putting an effort

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like Allah's passata says in the plan whoever desires the Hereafter and exerts the effort due to it while he's a believer. It is those whose effort is ever appreciated by Allah.

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Your job is the effort and then leave the rest of the

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less power data.

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Right? So asking ourselves those questions. And then when we're talking about okay, these outlets for these these hard emotions, what are actionable ways we can deal with it? When you feel powerless, focus on what you can do,

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like the advice of the Prophet Muhammad Sallallahu Sallam where he said that whoever among new season evil, let him change it with his hand. If you can't, then change it with his tongue if you can't, then with his heart, and that's the weakest level of faith. So the prophets, Allah SLM gives us three outlets for these emotions.

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She gives us hands for physical action, right, we use our hands to promote physical action, our tongue for verbal action, and our hearts for spiritual action.

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So the Prophet SAW, Selim is giving us three routes that we can take, when we feel powerless, when we see something that needs a change, that we have to try to create that change. Right. So with our hands, you know, there are some very, very evident ones that we can do, you know, you can email your political representative, you can donate to organizations that are that are striving to help, right. But another thing that's important to realize that you can do to is to combat helplessness through helping others,

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right, whether it's going to be helping our brothers and sisters there, or also helping others in our own lives,

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asking yourself, What good can I contribute in my daily life, because every good deed,

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it weighs, it weighs heavily on our skills, and it's powerful. And so being able to do that good being able to strive for that good. There was a research study that showed that

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groups were split up and one group was assigned that, okay, let's see what happens when you do a few simple small acts of kindness, like just a few days a week, like three days a week. And then another group got like traditional therapy and other group didn't get anything.

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In some cases, the group who did the acts of kindness actually had better results in alleviating anxiety and depressive symptoms, than even the group that had traditional therapy. And traditional therapy is very helpful for for anxiety and depression. And so helping others is not just for them, it's for ourselves. So if you're struggling to cope, in the situation, because you're feeling helpless. The antidote to helplessness is helping others. And so asking yourself, Okay, is there somebody I can give a meal to, there's somebody in need, that I could give a meal to, or I know, you know, my friend, like, if you, especially if you have a Palestinian friend, and who's who's coping

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with this, let me give her a call. And you know, see how she's doing and check in on her, do something kind for your parents, right?

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Helping others is a way of evoking change with your hands as well. And then now with your tongue, right, the prophesy Selim gave us another outlet is through verbal verbal action, to create change.

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The first and most obvious one, and the one that is so easily dismissed by so many is to make diet. And people when you hear the idea of making diet, people view it as a very passive process, but it is very, very active. And people kind of view it as like, Oh, it's a side note, of course, make diet but what else can I do? Our superpower the Prophet sallallahu sallam said, Nothing repels divine decree. But supplication dot can repel Divine Decree, like that tells you the intense power of it, and it should not be underestimated. And so, you know, create a dot list and place it somewhere where it's noticeable. And one of the things that helps me in this process, because I

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one of the feelings that sometimes people can have as they're witnessing everything that's happening and continue to witness it day after day after day, week after week,

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is my dog is not working. Right? I have been making diet, but nothing is changing. Right? And I think one of the things that can provide a lot of comfort is the reminder of the Hadith of the Prophet salallahu Salam where he says that there's no Muslim who calls upon Allah without sin or cutting family ties, but that Allah will give him one of three answers. So the three ways that die are accepted, he will quickly fulfill his supplication. So you're gonna get what you asked for, you're gonna see it right away, he will store it for him in the hereafter. So, you will come on the day of judgment and you will find your scale piled with these dots that have not been answered, or

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he will divert an evil from him some similar to it.

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All this past data will stop at something bad from happening because of this diet.

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And so his companion said in that case, we'll ask for more and the Prophet SAW Selim responded, Allah has even more.

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One of the reasons why I find this very comforting, is because I imagine like even if my diet is not being seen exactly the way that I hope it to be seen, when I'm making diet for my brothers and sisters, and Palestine, I think about how it could be stopping something bad from happening to one of them. Right, like something that would have hurt a child

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that my dot repelled that that evil. And that really, I can I find that very inspiring to think about that, because we don't know, we don't know what was going to happen. Only LS pathauto knows only LS Pattana knows what's written. And so if your dot can make a difference like that, that's a really powerful thought. And it can inspire you not to give up in it.

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The other thing to remind ourselves when we're talking about action with the tongue, is to speak the remembrance of Allah, remembering Allah subhanaw taala, glorifying Allah subhanaw taala Why is this so powerful is because it reminds us of who Allah subhanho data is, and that he's here and he's mirror and he has the power to create all change and he has the strength to create all change and he is the protector. It reminds us of who Allah subhanaw taala is. And also remember in the story of the Prophet Yunus at ASAM. The Prophet Yunus is a setup was in layer upon layer upon layer of darkness, three layers of darkness. He was in the darkness of the night, the darkness of the ocean

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and the darkness of the belly of the whale.

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And through all those darknesses Allah's passata, released him, released him from all three layers of darkness, just because of his one beautiful diet, where he said like ilaha illa, Anta Subhanak, Makoto and Adani mean, that there's no God worthy of worship, but you and I was from amongst the wrongdoers. And unless you have that assess about the Prophet Yunus, I said to him, he said, had he not constantly glorified Allah, had he not been from Elmo said behind the ones who constantly remember Allah glorify Allah, He would have remained in the belly of the whale until the day of resurrection.

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And so we see here that, that our release to from these darkness is and the release of the OMA from these darkness is just like our Prophet Yunus is that I'm was released is to become from amongst and Musa behind the people who glorify Allah subhanaw taala. And so this antidote to hopelessness in those moments, is to remember who Allah subhanaw taala is, and to remember his power and his capability. And we can do that through remembering him through constant remembrance of Him.

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And then, finally, the heart.

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And so we'll end with the heart and chulmleigh, which

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creating an outlet for these emotions through actions of the heart can be very, very powerful. And it can give us solace in these moments of difficulty and give us the solace that we need to continue to engage to continue to be there for our brothers and sisters and to can you continue to remember and think about them. And so one of the first ways to do this is,

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you know, I mentioned that a lot of us might struggle with survivor's guilt, right, where you open your phone, and you see the reality of your brothers and sisters. And it is so different from the reality that you're living. But you have to go from seeing that reality into your own reality, right? You vacillate between witnessing what they're going through and living your own reality. And that is very difficult, because it leads to a lot of guilt. Right? And so, how do we navigate that is we try to create positive intentions. And the Prophet SAW Selim tells us that our deeds are only by their intentions, and a person will only have what they intended. And so we all have to step away

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from our phones, and the pain that we're witnessing, you know, in order to, to do the things that we are responsible for in our lives. But doing it with a positive intention, can can be very, very helpful. And doing it with gratitude can be very, very helpful. So if you have to step away, to go to school, and get your education make it with a positive intention, but this is for the sake of Allah subhana data. Right? You are learning for the sake of Allah is PandaDoc fulfilling your responsibilities for his sake and turn it into a dot

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For your brothers and sisters in the children there who have lost their opportunity for education, their schools and make thought that Allah's paradata grants them better than what they've lost,

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that when you have to take care of your child, be present, invest in your child, that's our responsibility. And at the same time, intended for the sake of Allah fantatic. Because this is my responsibility, with gratitude that I'm so grateful that I have my child here, while making dot for our brothers and sisters who have lost theirs, right?

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Work, sleep, all of these different things that we are stepping away from their pain, and we are living our lives, do it with a positive intention, and do it with gratitude to Allah subhanho data, and transform that into diet for our brothers and sisters, who are not experiencing the same ease that we're experiencing. And, you know, I mentioned in the beginning of this that we are being tested. One of our tests is this test of ease, they are being tested with tremendous hardship, and we are being tested with witnessing their hardship while living lives of ease.

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And the test of ease,

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we have to face that with gratitude.

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It doesn't mean that you forget all the tests of hardships that they're going through, but we have to face our tests of ease with gratitude to Allah Spanner data. And now we transform it to dots for them. And so this allows us the chance to positively turn to Allah Spanner data in gratitude while making diet for them.

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The other thing and I think if there's one point that you leave this talk with, just leave it leave this talk with this point. This one I think, is just the most important.

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And it's that

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when we're talking about these emotions, the overwhelm that we feel and an outlet for it. I don't think that there is a better outlet than strengthening the OMA through strengthening ourselves in our connection to alas Pat data and becoming stronger Muslims, stronger and more obedient muslims to Allah Spanner data. How many stories have we heard of people opening the Quran and being transformed by the Quran recently, and converting to Islam and finding the beauty in the miracle that is the Quran and we've had this miracle and it collects dust into between the Ramadan and Ramadan, right? Like there are changing lives to strengthen our Oma. And so asking ourselves what is a change I can

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make in my daily life, right? If the OMA is one body,

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then I am a part of that body, I am a part of that body and my job is to strengthen the part of the body that I represent.

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And I can strengthen that by getting closer to Allah pancetta, being more worshiping ALLAH SubhanA, WA Tada more. We owe it to Allah's parents at first, we owe it to ourselves, we also owe it to our brothers and sisters, because imagine meeting them in the Hereafter, and being able to tell them

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that they inspired your change, that they made you a better Muslim, that the extra prayers that you did, were inspired by their resilience.

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And that you pray that they're rewarded immeasurably for what they inspired you to become.

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Realize that the source of all strength, the source of all power, the source of all strength of all change is with Allah subhana wa Tada. And so when we strengthen our connection to him, we strengthen the OMA as a whole.

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And so we have to work on ourselves, this is the best thing that we can do to strengthen ourselves as an old man. And so leave today with one extra act of worship than you usually do. And make a commitment to stick with it long term, not just now like while all of this is happening, but long term. So maybe it's to pray to two extra extra raka every day, right? Maybe one of the Sunnah, prayers that's associated with a different obligatory prayers. Or maybe it's to read one extra verse of the Quran a day one more than you usually read. Or it's to do to recite, as of course, see in the morning and in the evening, whatever it is, whatever it is, commit to it. And make your intention

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that you're doing this for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala to get closer to him, because that is the path to strengthening our OMA right and and stick with it. And imagine your skills on the day of judgment and sticking with this one small good deed that's going to amplify and multiply inshallah

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and so I want to end with one final approach that I have personally found very helpful. I made a brief video about this too, but I want to elaborate a little bit on it.

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And this is

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As a way to fill your heart, where I mentioned, we are going through vicarious trauma, which is witnessing other people's trauma. And that potentially being traumatic or at least is very painful for us. And so when you've seen an image, or a video, and it comes up in your mind, and it just pops up there, and you can't seem to get it out, and it leads to distress, and it's anxiety provoking, and it's painful, and you know, this happens, this happens because we're, we're being bombarded with these images, right? And so Tran transforming that picture in our minds, in a way that is based on truth can be very powerful. This is called imagery rescripting, which is replacing one image with

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another. And I find it most helpful to replace this image based on the truth of the Quran.

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And I want to give you three examples that you can take. Right, so if you are seeing a video or you are seeing a picture, and you're feeling crushed with witnessing the pain that our brothers and sisters are experiencing, and you feel powerless, to be able to console them, right, like you just want to be able to give this child a hug. You just want to be able to give them some sort of support some sort of ease and you can't, you can't alleviate their pain. Remember the promise of ALLAH SubhanA data that when they go to Jannah and sha Allah, Allah in the Quran says that they're going to say, Praise be to Allah, who has removed from us all sorrow. Indeed, our Lord is Forgiving and

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Appreciative. He is the one who out of his grace has settled us in the home of everlasting stay, where we will be touched by neither fatigue nor weariness.

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So you take that image, and you replace it with the image that this verse brings up in your mind of them, not being tired, not being weary, that all the sorrow has been removed from them, and you picture not you picture that, because it's a promise of Allah.

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When you're grieving the loss, when you see these posts of 800, you know, like 1000 lives or you know, like, all of these different people who have been, I mean, just so much so much death, so much loss, so much pain and when you're grieving that and you see these pictures.

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Picture same and Jana, where illustrata says, the meaning of which is they will have gardens of lasting bliss graced with flowing streams, there they will be adorned with bracelets of gold. There, they will wear green garments of fine silk and Brocade. There they will be comfortably seated on soft chairs, what a blessing reward What a pleasant resting place.

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And picture them.

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You know, picture picture these these images that you've seen of so many of our brothers and sisters in pain or having died, and picture them with these streams with these bracelets of gold with these green silk garments sitting on soft chairs, right, picture it.

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And then one of the things that stands out to so many of us when we see the people who have passed away is we think about the ones that they've left behind. And so when we grieve the people who have been left behind who are torn apart by the death of their loved ones and have lost so many loved ones.

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Picture the Promise of Allah subhanho data of their reunion where Allah Subhana Allah says in the Quran, the guardians of eternity which they will enter along with the righteous among their parents, spouses and descendants, and the angels will enter upon them from every gate, saying peace be upon you for your perseverance, How excellent is the ultimate abode. Picture that reunion, picture the reunion where not only are they going to be reunited with the people that they've lost and the people that they loved, but that angels are going to come and speak to them and say Peace be upon you for your perseverance

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so my Allah's pannacotta grant them the best of rewards in this life and in the next and grant them every possible goodness grant them success and victory and freedom from this oppression my my eldest pass out a reward all of you for your efforts to bring awareness to this to be aware of it to support your brothers and sisters and allow us the ability to continue to do that alone mammy

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mania and by that I mean just a Kamala Harris's bizarre that was her the deepest breaths I've taken in a long time Subhanallah that was so so necessary does that matter for making this such a practical and such a healing session? I can tell Michelle so many people about

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evidential iClicker to those who have been leaving your notes and your gems that you've been benefiting from in the chat will take some time to take questions inshallah. So I'll give you guys an opportunity to write some on the topic of today's talk in sha Allah and to ask them to sister Zahra Inshallah, and just a couple of minutes. But honestly, it's a panel, I don't know, I don't even know what to say, but the F print for how to experience this. And it's been so beneficial to have our, you know, like people of knowledge, and especially our mental health professionals come in and to educate the community because I feel like a lot of people have not experienced trauma to this

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level, or like, you know, contact trauma or whatever the official word is just just seeing somebody else's pain and feeling it so heavily. And I feel like Hamdulillah, this has been a very, it was all the bad that comes with it, this has been a very beneficial and educating experience for the community to learn how we approach this, and to even those who are not really close to their dean, you know, looking for answers through their, you know, Islamic sources and looking for answers in the vein, because that's what's brought us together, Subhan Allah. And as I know, there, I've said, there's no blueprint for this. But it has been such an amazing resource, your Islamic mental health

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course inside out outside and with a Maghrib institute that we've made available, which I hope that everyone who is here who is listening takes advantage of, because if you've benefited from some of the tools and some of the, you know, like, you know, advice that Sr, SR has given us in this session, you're going to absolutely love and benefit immensely from the content. And that course, because we tackle a lot of the things like Sorry, you just mentioned here, you know about trauma about

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keeping yourself again, with those tools to deal with shins and actions and all those practical mental health skills that you need to have. And a lot of these taboo

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topics that we just now as a community are getting comfortable speaking about and addressing. And, you know, our leaders are mentioning that they're struggling, and that this is something that we need to address as a community. So does that come later for this course. And for this talk, it was immensely beneficial. I did have some questions that have come up over the course of the past little while, while we also bring some questions in from the chat. And if you mentioned a question a little earlier, you can please just repost it here in the chat, so that we don't lose out that would be amazing, Angela. So one question. Is this bizarre? Is that how you navigate conversations or

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interactions with people who, obviously on the other side are maybe not as educated and they downplay or they dismiss the existence of the injustice that's happening, where they try to change the terminology and change the facts of the matter? How does it how do you navigate that when you're so frustrated, and, like just overwhelmed, and sometimes angry about what you're hearing on social media and in person when you're not? So that's an excellent, excellent question. I'm not sure I'm, because that's something that we we do deal with, right. And there is such a thing as righteous anger, right, which is that anger for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala. When we see oppression, when

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we see injustice is a thing you know, and it's something that is that that we experience. And, again, the meaning underneath that is that it shows our humanity and our care and our love for our brothers and sisters and our wanting justice. That's something that's so, so important. One of the things that I try to think about in those situations is, you know, there are places where Ellis pancetta has spoken to the prophets, Ally Salem, and in the Quran. And I don't know, for all of you, but one thing I noticed in my like daily quote and routine, is that the meaning of verses verses hit me in a really different way, since all of this,

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this genocide began, right. And there are some verses that that hit me in a way where it just kind of shows a different meaning, right. And so one of them is, you know, when Allah spent hours talking to the Prophet sallallahu sallam, and he says that basically, your job is to convey the message. Right? You know, you might be saddened by what they say what your job is to convey the message. Our job is to convey, right, we try our best and we try to do it in a way that is, as applicable to our audience with hikma with wisdom as we can, right, and whether a person is going to have an open heart and an open mind, then that's not up to us, that's going to be up to them, whether they're

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going to open up enough to be able to hear this, and it's going to be up to us pass that as guidance, right, of course. And so being able to acknowledge that and to realize, okay, my effort is, that's my responsibility, whether that is retained or accepted by this person. I can't do anything about that. And so I've done my part. I've done my part in in sharing a viewpoint that's based on fact, and based on on reason, and based on Islam, and if this person is not going to accept it, then I can't do anything about that. But yes, I'm going to be frustrated, I'm going to feel angry, but you also have to know when to step away. You have to also know when the person you're

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speaking with is just not somebody who's going to be open minded because then it's it's

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is a fool's errand right, where you're just wasting your energy on that. So you try to you try your best to do it in a way that's going to resonate with them. But it's, if if it doesn't happen, no, no one to call it and take a step back.

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Which is akin to luck, or that's very practical, then I see some comments. But if you can try to condense if you have a question, if you could condense it a little bit into one message that would be

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I get the gist of it. So someone's messaging that basically, they were very invigorated and on social media, and they were interacting a lot fearlessly responding to people on social media, and they started getting tired, targeted by Zionists started bullying them, and now, you know, their families tell them to kind of step away, so that just for safety reasons, do where do you draw the line or boundaries in terms of the way the things that you say and the way that you interact online? Like what or do you have any guidelines for how we can respond to people on social media responses? So, you know,

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it's a hard question, because my personal approach will be different than other people's personal approaches. But I think that one thing, that's

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one thing that's important, is, you know, like in this situation, where safety person safety becomes an issue, and unfortunately, it's scary, how how much that has been becoming an issue, right? Is it is important to take precautions, right, if you realize that your safety if for any reason has been threatened, then going along the appropriate chain and process to ensure that you're safe is important. Right? Like, take the profits SLM, encouraged us, if you see some sort of evil, right, then our responsibility is to help the oppressed and the oppressor, right. And so if you are in a situation where you are being oppressed, right, where you are being intimidated, and you know, there

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could be a danger to you, you have to help yourself in that situation. That is very, that is very important. I also think that the

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everybody has a different perspective, but I think the online arguing back and forth in comments, doesn't really create too much change. And it can create a lot of animosity, because the nature of online discourse is very dehumanizing. People become keyboard warriors, and they say things that they would never say, to somebody else's face. And so making sure that the way that you're approaching this issue, you know, I was just hearing, I was attending a tough seated class. And one of the things that one of the participants mentioned that she so admired about the way Muslims are, are dealing with this is when you go to a pro Palestinian protests, people are expressing things in

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a respectful but strong way. Strong and respectful. Versus if you hear some of other people's

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feedback, it's done in a way that's very, that uses profanity. That is insulting. That is, there's just a lot of inappropriateness in the way that it's being conveyed. That doesn't do us any, any service, if that's the way that we're trying to convey our opinions. And so doing it in a way that is strong, but respectful, I think always leaves you with the upper hand, always leaves you with the upper hand, doing things within the bounds of what is appropriate, as a Muslim, in the way that we convey our thoughts. And, you know, without without profanity, without direct insult to that person, but instead change trying to challenge what they're saying, rather than using derogatory language

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toward them. That is more representative of us as Muslims. And so I think that, you know, it's hard to give specific input on how you know, to go about this, but I would just say, think about, like, if the prophet saw I said that was reading this comment. Would he be proud of you? Right, would he be proud of you and the way that you're handling it? Right, remember the situation where the Abu Bakr Ilan was sitting with the promise SLM, and somebody came, and he was like, berating him and stuff like that. And he stayed silent. And then, and we worked hard to respond to the law and start to respond to him and the province SLM, got up and left and he said, I don't stay in the same places

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where the Shaitan has, has entered. Right. So it's not to say that we can't speak up for ourselves we absolutely can. But think about it in terms of what would the prophesy Selim think about this, this particular comment, I think that sometimes can help us to, to differentiate what is what what's helpful and what's not. Beautifully says to start, yeah, you're very right. It's a very fine line and not a lot of us balance it super well, in terms of of actually making an impact and helping the cause some people you could just push people away from the cause and the way that you do

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In response, it's definitely an important like it's a responsibility, how we address things. So a couple a few more questions of comments, I'll try to sift through as fast as we

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can, there was one earlier that came in privately, physiological response, for example, like the lack of sleep.

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You'd like stomach cramps, like headache, like just the stress that's coming out from just being experienced exposed to this, is there anything that you can do specific? Yeah, absolutely. And a lot of us are experiencing those physiological symptoms and a lot of us are having responses that you might not even realize are from the the fact that we're witnessing so much, so much. And so if if it becomes intense, I would definitely recommend that you reach out to a therapist, preferably a Muslim one, or anybody who at least will under who will be pro Palestinian, right, because if you're, you, it won't be a helpful

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engagement or relationship if the person is not understanding that right, but but if it gets bad, I would definitely recommend seeing a therapist to help with coping skills through this. But just for some basic, some basic ones, doing physiological

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therapeutic exercises can be very helpful. And it's something that's recommended in therapy. So this is something as simple as deep breathing right, where you breathe in for four, you hold for four, you exhale for six, right doing deep breathing when you're noticing the like when you're when you're noticing that your your physical symptoms are coming up, can be very helpful. Look into a method called the Emotional Freedom Technique, tapping you can find videos on how to do it that can also be very helpful for physiological anxiety symptoms. mindfulness exercises can be helpful and they can be helpful especially when you do it in conjunction with Islamic thing. So you know, if a

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mindfulness exercise is you know, like a, an imagery kind of exercise, you know, in like, you're, you're, you're picturing nature or if it's a mindfulness exercise where you're actually walking outside in nature and you're you're noticing that, like, turn it into something that connects you with Allah's pattern data. So when you go out in nature, and you look at the trees, saying singing these like being from animals and behind the people who glorify Allah saying Subhan Allah, and hamdulillah right for the blessings around you and, and everything, being out in nature can be very, very helpful for that too. So those are just a few simple suggestions. One other one is progressive

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muscle relaxation. Again, you can Google that and you can find videos to guide you through it. But these are all like therapeutic approaches that take on a physiological approach to anxiety symptoms, so inshallah they can be helpful

00:53:01--> 00:53:35

just like a locker that was a lot of really beneficial with suggestions Mashallah. I see some some more questions coming in. So one person was asking you about how do you deal with information and questions from our children? I don't think we have time to address it fully. But I know you've addressed it in videos on Instagram as well and I'm Maghrib actually has also created raising giants the spring course with over there I mean, as Sarah and your kids to specifically have an age appropriate conversation around this you know, like tragedy that's been going on the genocide in Gaza and addressing it with children through a series a little plug I highly recommend it so that

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that yeah, of course is going to be amazing, right, like so first of all that one, Nora kids is an amazing resource. Michelle, Allah they have a ton of posts on their Instagram page exactly about that question how to address this with kids in kid appropriate language. They have a webinar that they did that was beautifully done that you can actually watch and watch with your child. And it's like long it has a lot of content and and everything and it's actually the line that I set up like dot being your superpower I got from that webinar. Yeah, it was great. So so so yeah, definitely I would recommend looking into that. Also.

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I can't remember who published this. I think something Mian

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but she has a book called Ilyas explains and it's an entire free PDF ebook of how you can read through with your kids, which is you know, like a stroke kind of story format, conversational format about explaining Palestine and the struggle of like what's happening to your children. So it's a great resource to you.

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Awesome classes, multiple resources for you with asking just like a listener for the question. The next question is, or someone's mentioned is like, one thing I've noticed that it's really becomes a competition in terms of who's doing more for Palestine and on social media as well. Who's boycotting more who's doing that? How do you navigate? Like, is that healthy? Is that good intention to approach the situation with because sometimes it can be like, Oh, you're not wearing it.

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Fear today you're not you know, you're not representing enough. You weren't at that protest yesterday. How do you Amanda really, really great, great question, Mashallah.

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One of the things that social media, there's a lot of benefit to social media in this particular situation. But one of the struggles that comes with it is performative.

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What's the word that they use like kind of performative

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action, you know, like with, with trying to, to be like, Okay, I posted 20, you know, 20 story shares, and three posts today about this topic and everything. So people can see how intensely invested I am, right? It's so it's so hard to check our intentions, it's so hard to check our intentions. And social media makes it so much harder, because it's all about likes, and how many people have seen it, how many people agree with me and how many followers I have, and things like that, it makes it very, very, very hard. And so like, the best piece of advice I can give you on that is making a lot for sincerity, right? asking Allah subhanaw taala to purify your intentions, so

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that you know that you are doing it for the sake of Allah subhanaw taala and not for the sake of people seeing you do it, right. So naturally, when you share something, you want people to see it, because that's the whole point of sharing this information. But making the intention, I want people to see it, because I want it to weigh on my scales on the Day of Judgment. As I setup Algeria, like as an ongoing charity, I want people to benefit from it. I want to create a new narrative, I want to share information that's valuable. This, my intention is that I am changing what I can with my hand. And since I can't change it with my hand by doing something over there, I'm changing with my hand by

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typing something here, right? Sharing this post, creating this post creating this content, go into this protest doing these things, checking the end, just reminding yourself of the intention. If shaitan tries to get in and everything you've tried, you've tried to remind yourself and attention and you're Allah's pancetta for sincerity, but that's an ongoing, lifelong battle. And it's gotten harder with with social media. But don't let shaitan get in the way of tricking you that like my intention is messed up. So I'm not going to do it. Because that's also another trick of ShaVonne. So, so keep going. But just be cognizant, and be mindful of your intention to try and make

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it very purposeful and chunlan MC dot

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beautifully said, just like Kamala Harris is to Sorry, sorry, we're at just a little past the hour now, apologies for taking the liberty with that extra bit of time. But that was an amazing q&a and an amazing session. And I hope that everyone here benefited and if you've benefited from it personally, please do share that because you don't know who's dealing with what I was shocked to see, you know, after time that some people in my circle were having such a heavy time or were saying things that were like almost like Subhanallah like shaky in the way that they were responding to it because they just had been sitting with these emotions and not getting proper guidance and how to

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navigate them and this is why we're here this is why this session is happening because that can occur sorry for making that possible. And everyone who's here please there's no excuse please make sure that you do check out inside out outside and all the things that did their various forms she speaks at length on in the class inside or outside and about how to navigate these feelings and these mental health challenges that have been arising from not just this this experience but our experience as Muslims so please do make sure that you check

00:58:25--> 00:59:01

that out the link is online, it's in the description as well share that with other people you don't know who needs it and who's struggling and it's pay what you can so it's open for everyone to benefit from exactly where to start once again any final words before we close off now just as much paid for having me here and giving me the ability to to speak about this I find it so helpful for myself to be able to talk about this topic and hamdullah with like minded people and then please yet I think that registering for the course one of the things that I really appreciate about I'd Metrobus that they realized that mental health content was really needed in our community and they

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made it pay what you want. So you know if it no matter what you can afford, you can access that information and it's something I very much appreciate about about unmetric Institute mashallah so just like we love to get to all of you for for doing that.

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Of course always at this time that was so necessary and Hamdulillah that we had had access to these kinds of resources and we hope that as many people as possible can benefit Inshallah, we hope to see y'all in the course and interact with you guys.

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Person very soon sisters are just like mother once again and it's such a chaotic like emotional roller coaster of a time every time we get a bit of a break from that and then we learn how to just fix everything that's going on our minds and then come out as more productive members of society as protesters as Muslims as advocates for the cause. May Allah make that heavy in your scale as well. I'm in Yoruba

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all of us all of us. I mean us for now. Take care and happy stay healthy, stay safe and s&m. Wanna go? Whatever the life are about to get to everyone why?