Love

share this pageShare Page
Habib Bobat

Channel: Habib Bobat

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


00:00:00--> 00:00:35

Ending the Jumeirah loss of 100. Allah bless us all. here today to give us the Jumeirah lecture is none other than more than a hobby but more than a graduated from there in our looms Acharya in 2010 and has studied and the numerous senior Islamic scholars, mana also finds himself as a presenter on radio is and I'm sure many of us know that today is the 14th of February, which is according to the Western world Valentine's Day, so you have to give a talk on a rather relevant topic. The topic of love, we call upon more than a hobby

00:01:10--> 00:01:14

Assalamu alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh barakato

00:01:17--> 00:01:52

al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa Rahmatullahi wa Salatu was Salam ala MB mursaleen Amma Baraka yaku la junta Barrow Katerina filco, an image evil photoconductive Hamid are all the winner him in a shaytani r rajim Bismillahi Rahmani Raheem amin iottie he and Hala partner comin and fusi come as word letus kuno la jolla Watanabe newcomer word ditambah. In the feed Erica komiya

00:01:54--> 00:02:01

Yoko Luna Vu sur la la hora he was sending them Mara a to Lily Mota have been misled nikka

00:02:02--> 00:02:06

Sadako la la de Masada Pena v you will carry

00:02:07--> 00:02:12

honorable students, respected elders, brothers, mothers and sisters.

00:02:14--> 00:02:18

Love is an essential part of our life.

00:02:20--> 00:02:22

When a person feels loved,

00:02:23--> 00:02:26

he finds a sense of belonging.

00:02:27--> 00:02:30

He finds a sense of connectedness.

00:02:32--> 00:02:35

He finds a sense of security.

00:02:37--> 00:02:43

He feels appreciated, and everybody wants love in some form or the other.

00:02:45--> 00:02:48

And in the absence of love,

00:02:49--> 00:02:51

a person feels rejection.

00:02:53--> 00:02:58

A person feels a sense of loneliness.

00:03:00--> 00:03:05

A person at times even suffers from complex issues.

00:03:07--> 00:03:12

A person's morale breaks, a person's confidence is shattered.

00:03:13--> 00:03:24

So Love is a natural emotion of life. In fact, Allah subhanho wa Taala refers to himself is an inward dude.

00:03:25--> 00:03:35

The Compassionate One, the loving one, the kind one, the epi tome of love is Allah subhanho wa Taala.

00:03:36--> 00:03:40

Allah is the source of all love in this world.

00:03:42--> 00:03:44

So Love is a natural emotion.

00:03:45--> 00:03:57

Then we have a La Silla. lohani you send them was with his companions and a mother is running Helter Skelter. She is restless, she is looking for her suckling baby.

00:03:58--> 00:04:22

And she's moving this side and she's moving that side. And suddenly her eyes fall on her child. Immediately. she rushes towards the baby. The baby clings towards the mother. Just Just understand this sentiment. The baby clings on to the mother and starts to breastfeed on the mother. The Prophet of Allah sallallahu Sallam tells his companion

00:04:24--> 00:04:30

and he asked him the question, or to Rona de partie Hatton whether they have in

00:04:31--> 00:04:39

all my companions Tell me was this loving, kind affectionate mother throw and flung her child in the fire.

00:04:40--> 00:04:41

They said

00:04:42--> 00:04:44

the chances are remote.

00:04:46--> 00:04:57

Her love for a child will not allow for her to do something like that. And then a beautiful, responded Lola who are very birdie he mean has he be well into

00:04:59--> 00:04:59

a lot

00:05:00--> 00:05:11

is more kind, alive, more loving allies, more affectionate allies more compassionate towards the slave even more than what this mother is towards her child.

00:05:13--> 00:05:33

So Love is a natural emotion. Allah is the source of love. And the strongest form of love ever experienced by any person is the love between a slave and his creator. One lady in a shed the hub Benny na, Allah says in the Quran

00:05:35--> 00:05:42

that the believers are profound in the love for Allah subhanho wa Taala they love Allah subhanho wa Taala.

00:05:43--> 00:05:46

So that's just an introduction to the topic.

00:05:48--> 00:05:54

Love is not condemned, actually, it's encouraged when it is within the framework of

00:05:55--> 00:06:12

the Navy for last summer law this term used to express his love for his beloved wife, he used to say in the ruzic to help baja Wow. He would express his love for his wife in public.

00:06:13--> 00:06:17

He would say Khadija Allah has given me profound love for her.

00:06:19--> 00:06:24

How many of us express our love for our partners? We feel shy.

00:06:25--> 00:06:41

We feel shy to express our love for our partners. The Prophet of Allah would emphatically praise his wife or eyeshadow the law Thailand has seen in Asia, in Nisa, the for the 30 the honor, sir at

00:06:44--> 00:06:46

the value of Ayesha

00:06:48--> 00:07:18

the status and the honor of Ayesha over all women of this world is like the status and the value of the read through read is a beautiful dish and a very delicious dish which the Arabs enjoy. So he says the love and the value of Ayesha over all women of this world is like the value of read over all other dishes to the Arabs. This is expressing love.

00:07:19--> 00:07:28

This is expressing positive sentiments for your partner. It is rewardable when it is done with the right person in the right setting.

00:07:30--> 00:07:37

And it is reprehensible when it is done with the wrong person in the wrong setting. Simple as that.

00:07:40--> 00:07:50

Now to understand the aspect of love Allah subhanho wa Taala says, What am I mean coo masala Hina mean arriba the Kuma email.

00:07:52--> 00:08:00

In this verse, Allah says, Let get your young ones and the unmarried folks in your community, get them married.

00:08:02--> 00:08:07

get them married. Because Islam only offers two options.

00:08:09--> 00:08:11

You either get married,

00:08:12--> 00:08:15

and if you can't exercise restraint, there's no middle option.

00:08:16--> 00:08:32

So allowance is one capital am income. Get the unmarried folks in your community getting married, even if a lady was divorce, or even if she's a widow, or a lady that hasn't married before, get them all married. Why?

00:08:33--> 00:08:41

Because Nika and marriage is the only institute that provides safety from the sin outside in the world.

00:08:43--> 00:09:00

The Sharia does not encourage promiscuous relationships. The Sharia attaches a lot of importance to the relationships of men and women. Therefore, the Sharia has a framework within which people should conduct themselves.

00:09:01--> 00:09:23

So when we talk about love, true love is only experience through the bond of nikka then a B of Allah sallallahu Sallam said Mariah to Lin Mata hub Bailey Mifflin, Nika I have not seen any Institute like the Institute of NACA which brings two people together. So

00:09:25--> 00:09:28

every other relationship besides that,

00:09:29--> 00:09:30

is infatuation

00:09:31--> 00:09:44

is not on solid grounds. So there Sherry says two options. Either get married or when your staff in Levine allow you to do nanika Hatha Yoga near home alone in

00:09:46--> 00:09:52

your exercise restraint. yamashiro Shut up. Minister amin Kumar

00:09:54--> 00:09:58

Oh youngsters get married then we have a law says

00:09:59--> 00:09:59

for him

00:10:00--> 00:10:01

About Boolean buzzer

00:10:02--> 00:10:08

four through the Institute of Nika, you will be able to protect your chestatee.

00:10:12--> 00:10:20

If a man is not men enough to approach your father and asked for your hand in marriage is not a man.

00:10:24--> 00:10:33

If a man is not able to approach your father and asked for your hand in marriage is not a man is fooling around with you,

00:10:34--> 00:10:36

is giving you false hope.

00:10:37--> 00:10:55

sherea says no problem you're attracted to the person, not an issue requires commitment. Dating requires no commitment. person walks up whenever he wants, you know, keeping my options open. If things don't work out, molana nothing must hold me back.

00:10:57--> 00:11:02

So the sherea attaches value to our relationships.

00:11:03--> 00:11:13

Through nica, we are giving dignity to the women folk in our life. We are telling them we are willing to make our commitment to you for the rest of our life.

00:11:15--> 00:11:16

But when a person is caught in,

00:11:17--> 00:11:25

there is no commitment. There is no long term commitment. In fact, in the youngsters, it's popular. And I got three I'm just keeping my options open.

00:11:27--> 00:11:28

One in my school,

00:11:29--> 00:11:33

one in my neighborhood, and one on social media.

00:11:34--> 00:11:36

So I'm just checking my options.

00:11:38--> 00:11:45

But you know, what's the scary part about courting and dating? Today, youngsters? at the tender age of eight, they already have a girl in their life.

00:11:47--> 00:12:03

So if a youngster is getting married at the age of 25, it's 17 years of exposure to this kind of relationships. Now in the ultimate moment comes to tie the knot he i'm not i'm not sure Mona, I can make this commitment. I mean, I was so flexible all my life.

00:12:04--> 00:12:15

I was never bound to one person. Can you see the consequences of dating and courtship? It destroys the value of relationships in our life.

00:12:16--> 00:12:22

Now the man has to think you mean one or this person for the rest of my life. Even one

00:12:24--> 00:12:25

have to think about it.

00:12:27--> 00:12:38

Because when you caught in to take one drop one take one drop one. I met a youngster he says when I make to him and I'm with this one for very long, and I thought he's gonna say few months, few years, three weeks.

00:12:41--> 00:12:42

Three weeks.

00:12:44--> 00:12:44

Yarrow,

00:12:47--> 00:12:48

Yarrow, Bissell,

00:12:50--> 00:12:57

and at the same time, playing with love with the lives of how many girls, one on the side, one on that side, one on that side.

00:12:58--> 00:13:02

And the poor girl on the other side thinks I've got a very loyal person.

00:13:04--> 00:13:08

This is my dream man on the mean. Meanwhile, he's got no intentions of long term commitments.

00:13:11--> 00:13:16

I want you to just think for a moment would you be comfortable giving your daughter to a man like this?

00:13:18--> 00:13:23

Would you be comfortable giving your sister to a man like this? Who's got a track record?

00:13:25--> 00:13:27

In fact, some boys are even known as players.

00:13:28--> 00:13:31

So to say that's the language the youngsters understand.

00:13:33--> 00:13:40

You know, I got two daughters. I sometimes sit and think what will happen to them when they are growing up.

00:13:41--> 00:13:54

This is the kind of youngsters we are producing. And because of the environment in the culture around us, that has no value for nica has no value for marriage.

00:13:55--> 00:13:56

It's a free world.

00:13:58--> 00:13:59

It's a world of choice.

00:14:00--> 00:14:05

We can be with whomsoever we want. And if you're not happy, we can just walk out

00:14:07--> 00:14:13

and why Islam emphasizes on nikka on the other side, so that you can grow up knowing who's your father and who's your mother.

00:14:17--> 00:14:24

Imagine you cheapen the Institute of nikka to such an extent that anybody can be with anyone.

00:14:25--> 00:14:27

Whether it's permissible or not.

00:14:28--> 00:14:32

The biggest factor is your children will not even know who their parents are.

00:14:34--> 00:14:42

Number two because of no commitment between the two parties. It's a dating relationship.

00:14:44--> 00:14:47

The child is growing up in a broken home.

00:14:49--> 00:14:53

How many girls we fought our family to be together.

00:14:55--> 00:14:57

Today he has left him Alana try

00:14:59--> 00:14:59

it said isn't

00:15:00--> 00:15:01

It breaks you.

00:15:03--> 00:15:09

So the only thing that respects the dignity of a woman is marriage.

00:15:10--> 00:15:14

through marriage, we express our long term commitment to a lady.

00:15:16--> 00:15:27

And this is one of the scary things for many non Muslims. We're not ready to get into a long term relationship. We're just trying things, you know, number one, number two,

00:15:28--> 00:15:34

during your courtship period, you never get to see the reality of a person. Never.

00:15:36--> 00:15:37

It's a facade.

00:15:39--> 00:15:43

In a case of a youngster, is loving of his father's expertise.

00:15:44--> 00:15:48

The fancy gifts that he's showering you with is not from his money.

00:15:49--> 00:16:01

So it's easy to maintain this relationship at this moment, there's no real investment. The real challenge of your life comes when the man has to stand on his own feet

00:16:02--> 00:16:05

when he now needs to spend from his own pocket

00:16:07--> 00:16:20

and that's when the people get cold feet. You know, man, I don't understand this man. before we got married, is to phone me hours. Now, WhatsApp, voice notes.

00:16:22--> 00:16:25

And head also when I speak to him, I get one word answers

00:16:26--> 00:16:32

before marriage is to make excuses to speak to me. After marriage, he makes excuses not to speak to me.

00:16:34--> 00:16:40

Before marriage, he was ready to jump his father's balcony to come see me. Now I'm in the same house. He knows me.

00:16:42--> 00:16:49

Before marriage, he used to shower women shower me with expensive gifts. Now I don't even get a lousy KitKat

00:16:50--> 00:16:52

atone no mana.

00:16:54--> 00:16:58

Before marriage, he was romantic. I'm telling you this man is bipolar.

00:17:02--> 00:17:09

You don't get to see the two sides of a person when you are dating such short periods isn't.

00:17:11--> 00:17:13

But in marriage 24. Seven together.

00:17:14--> 00:17:22

Now you get to see the ugly side of the person. And you think to yourself, yeah, Rob, where did I get stuck?

00:17:24--> 00:17:26

So divorce

00:17:30--> 00:17:38

is dating and courtship. preparing you for marriage, or setting you up for divorce?

00:17:41--> 00:17:42

is a question to ask.

00:17:45--> 00:17:49

Because nothing is based on truth and reality.

00:17:51--> 00:17:52

europace only.

00:17:53--> 00:18:13

That is why the Sharia is so practical. You love a girl, not a problem, approach the father get married. And the Hadeeth also say to the parents, that when you receive a proposal for your daughter, with a person you are happy with his character and his religiosity, get them married. Or else they'll be

00:18:14--> 00:18:16

happy in society.

00:18:17--> 00:18:19

to not allow any boy

00:18:21--> 00:18:25

to play with your feelings just to fit in somebody's life.

00:18:27--> 00:18:41

And you definitely don't have to cheapen your value, just to be somebodies partner. Allah has given you respect. Allah has given you dignity. Let the men earn your respect.

00:18:43--> 00:19:02

have self respect. And I say to parents, teach your daughters self respect, that they're not some commodity, or some tools of manipulation that you can use. You don't have to compromise your values, just to be somebody who's confident or somebody whose partner

00:19:04--> 00:19:11

have self respect. And I say to the youngsters, learn to respect a woman in your life.

00:19:12--> 00:19:16

If you cannot respect a woman, don't settle with anyone.

00:19:17--> 00:19:28

She is somebody's daughter. She is somebody's sister. Just as you want the best for your sister and for your daughter. Wish the same for the lady in your life.

00:19:31--> 00:19:32

This issue sherea

00:19:33--> 00:19:41

sherea how much of respect? How much of love are we up to show the partners in our life?

00:19:42--> 00:19:43

I was just reading last night.

00:19:44--> 00:19:48

then it'd be of a loss of Alison and Mary's sofiero the alone time

00:19:49--> 00:19:55

she needs to mount the camera. He literally kneels down

00:19:56--> 00:19:58

and the Sahaba watching this

00:19:59--> 00:19:59

in London

00:20:00--> 00:20:01

Really kneels down

00:20:03--> 00:20:11

and she places her leg and her feet on the knees of the prophets of Allah Holly Solomon and she climbs up

00:20:12--> 00:20:14

on the thighs of our beloved rasuluh blossom.

00:20:15--> 00:20:17

That is called respect.

00:20:19--> 00:20:20

That is called respect.

00:20:21--> 00:20:22

Your

00:20:24--> 00:20:30

respect is when anybody invited the Prophet of Allah He said, my wife will come with

00:20:32--> 00:20:34

my wife will come with

00:20:36--> 00:20:50

a Sahabi invited him and he said for you only, he said, No, I would like to come with my wife. So he said, No, no for you own a Viva La. He said no, then I humbly declined. He said, okay, bring her with also.

00:20:51--> 00:20:52

I shall

00:20:54--> 00:21:11

make the Prophet sallallahu alayhi salam, your role model in life. We don't only follow him in Salah. We don't only follow him in xhaka and Hajj and Ramadan. We follow him in every aspect of our life. Love is no different.

00:21:12--> 00:21:31

Love is no different. I shall be allowed. Alan has says when I would sit on a glass of water, the prophet of Allah would take the glass and look where it was my lips and he would place his mobarak lips on the same place where I would place my lips and then drink

00:21:32--> 00:21:35

your own piece on. That is called love.

00:21:37--> 00:21:37

There is love.

00:21:39--> 00:21:40

She says

00:21:41--> 00:21:46

when I would eat meat, then it'd be a full load take the same meat from me and eat from there.

00:21:48--> 00:21:48

There is less

00:21:50--> 00:21:57

than a B of A law would literally take a morsel of food and place it in her mouth. There is love.

00:21:59--> 00:22:07

She says we raise one another. The first time I won. The second time he wanted me. There is love

00:22:09--> 00:22:17

the narration of Buhari when knightfall would come and he'd be of a law would walk with me and talk to me. That is love.

00:22:19--> 00:22:31

So I say to ladies and to the girls look for long term commitments. But there are many channels out there who will sweep you off your feet but nobody to catch you in your fall.

00:22:35--> 00:22:36

Mashallah.

00:22:37--> 00:22:39

Mashallah, Mashallah.

00:22:42--> 00:22:52

Mashallah, there is love brothers, study the life of the Prophet salallahu alaihe salam and you see how colorful he was, How romantic he was.

00:22:53--> 00:23:06

And how much of love he had for his family Allahumma salli ala Sayyidina. Muhammad, may Allah give us such love? May Allah give our children such love? May Allah fill the unions with such love and muhabba.

00:23:07--> 00:23:12

So, as I wrap up my talk, I know I got a few minutes left.

00:23:14--> 00:23:24

Islam has only two options. Either get married, and be serious about your commitment or exercise restraint.

00:23:25--> 00:23:33

But do not get involved in courtship. For you are just preparing yourself for misery afterwards in life.

00:23:35--> 00:23:36

And number two, understand

00:23:37--> 00:24:01

that the Sharia the reason why the Sharia is so stringent and so strict in this regard, is because the Sharia wants people to respect the value of nica. If you cheapen the Institute of Nika, our children will be left without fathers and mothers, and people will have no long term commitment. People will just take other people for a ride.

00:24:03--> 00:24:13

You leave broken homes and broken hearts every way. That's not what the missionary Alliance. The cheriya wants us to be committed to one another.

00:24:15--> 00:24:37

Study surah a new and see how Allah wants a Muslim community to be based on religiosity and righteous righteousness, where people respect one another where people know each other's limitations. For a society that is raised on good morals.

00:24:38--> 00:24:57

This will learn to respect everyone in their life, and more importantly, they will be able to honor their commitments. It's about honoring your commitment. How many men can say your safely I am living up to the promise I made to my wife. How many of us

00:25:01--> 00:25:09

May Allah subhanaw taala give us the understanding. In conclusion, brothers and sisters, and those who are listening and viewing us this afternoon,

00:25:10--> 00:25:34

we need to make an effort. Love does not come naturally. You've got to work. Love is ugly. Love is plentiful. Love requires patience. Love requires commitment. It's not how rosy your relationship is, when things are going. It's about how you are able to manage the crisis in your own when the bunk boat is rocking.

00:25:35--> 00:25:42

That's when love is tested. It's easy to have fair weather. You're nice to me, I'm nice to you. It's very easy.

00:25:44--> 00:25:47

But that test of love comes

00:25:48--> 00:26:04

when there's crisis in the relationship. Are you able to? Are you able to live up to the commitment you made? Or you say, Oh, so now when the heating got hot, now in the heat got too much, you're walking out?

00:26:06--> 00:26:12

You're walking out a time the lady will say to you leave me in order for her to hear. Don't leave me.

00:26:17--> 00:26:21

A lady will walk out of your life for you to say come back my daddy.

00:26:22--> 00:26:24

A foolish the man deserto.

00:26:26--> 00:26:27

Don't forget your things.

00:26:30--> 00:26:33

She wants to see how much are you committed to.

00:26:35--> 00:26:39

And foolish is a man who is unable to pick up the signals from his partner.

00:26:41--> 00:26:46

We need to make an effort at the end of the day. superficial love is very easy.

00:26:47--> 00:26:58

superficial love is very easy. But true love acquires maturity. There were occasions in the house of the Prophet sallallahu Sallam where for one month,

00:26:59--> 00:27:01

nobody was speaking to each other one month.

00:27:03--> 00:27:06

But that did not mean the end of the road.

00:27:09--> 00:27:12

Test did not mean that's the end of the road.

00:27:14--> 00:27:24

They understood that we have to work on our relationship. There were times with an A B of a line eyeshadow the dial on her head the normal squabbles, which every couple will have in life.

00:27:27--> 00:27:57

So we need to prepare our youth. In conclusion, my message is, let's pay value to the nikka in our communities. Number two, let's understand where courtship and dating is taking us in our in our homes. Number three, exercise self respect. Number four, learn to respect a lady in your life. Number five, understand love does not come easily. You have to work on it.

00:27:58--> 00:28:23

You have to work on it. Like a car, you get a small dent outside in order to go sell your car and throw it away 72 penerbitan manana. This car has been with me for the past 15 years. I'll buy a new car, but I won't get rid of this car. We don't throw things in our life when things are not working. When things are not working in your workplace, do you say I'm quitting my job? Or do you say no?

00:28:24--> 00:29:09

I've got to look at the bigger picture. I've got a rosy coming. I've got a family to sustain. So I'll put up with this if I have to. In every other facet of our life, we put up with nonsense. Why are we not willing to do the same when it comes to relationships? Why is it that the exit strategy is the first thing that we adopt? When things are not working? Why? Why can we not make things work? Why can we not pay more regard to this? May Allah subhanaw taala bless us all robina hublin I mean, as Virgina was in Portland, Oregon, with john Malin with dakini Mama, Allah wants us to thrive in our relationships. That's why even taught us how to make dua in the Quran.

00:29:10--> 00:29:13

Allah bless our partners in our children.

00:29:14--> 00:29:19

There is the Diwan robina hublin amenas vergina Ria Tina

00:29:22--> 00:29:25

tacchini mama Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

00:29:31--> 00:30:00

Michelle Michelle obviously she couldn't be more than a hobby for that rod the beautiful talk on the topic of love and you make to our loss of $100 crowns that we all understand the concepts of love according to the Sharia and according to the rulings in Islam monopolize I mean, as we said before more than a hobby has graduated from the loom Zakaria in 2010 and has studied under numerous Islamic scholars and he is also a presenter of radio Islam and we make to Allah subhanaw taala

00:30:00--> 00:30:12

groans more than a hobby a long life and when you grow from strength to strength ensure loss that you can continue to give such heartwarming and inspirational talks inshallah Tyler shukran are Salam alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

00:30:20--> 00:30:32

And welcome to mana Habib. And also the meaning of happy means love for the beautiful lecture Mona's conducted Xochimilco on a loss of a handle increase the love amongst yourself. I

00:30:33--> 00:30:48

mean, this one announced a few announcements 679 is event blocking a person who the person wanted to leave about 15 minutes ago already, so you can just please move your hand and topic. And then also it gives me great

00:30:49--> 00:31:37

pleasure and honor to announce that the MCC has awarded our beloved Noland, Dr. Ali item with the Life Achievement Award for the sacrifices, that commitment and the great dedication molana has contributed towards education nationally and internationally. From a loss of 100 on non law long, healthy life in sha Allah, to be an inspiration to be a dedication to all of us for many, many more years to come. Many are blind I mean, and also we make dua for the father of one of our colleagues here at Islamic Islamic college. At the primary site Mrs. Ada Ahmed, who lost his father during the week to also the very was also the brother of URI Ahmed, from Schoenbach magic mcdata. The loss of a

00:31:37--> 00:31:38

hand with Allah grande hydro