Essential Fiqh Class

Daood Butt


Channel: Daood Butt

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Sunday January 24, 2021


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The conversation discusses the types of divorce that occur during a divorce process, including whether the husband intended to divorce when he mentioned something about divorce or if it was just meant to encourage his wife to do something or leave her. The legal process for divorce is discussed, including the importance of not arguing for it and finding out how many times a divorce has occurred in the past to determine whether it was completed or not. The woman named Elizabeth is experiencing the worstacquisition of her life, in the hospital, and hesitantly attend any events until she gets an appointment.

Transcript ©

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Bismillah Rahim al hamdu Lillahi Rabbil alameen wa sallahu wa alayhi wa sallam or an abbey Hill Karim, Allah, Allah to what atoma tasleem or bizarrely sodbury were Sidley Emery. Well hello, there temporarily Sonia of Coco Lee, my brothers and my sisters said Mr. Eddie come to LA, he will buy our cattle, I hope that you are all doing well inshallah, tada, I hope that you can hear me properly.

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I hope that you're happy in your marriages, or you're going to happily be married very soon inshallah to Allah, or you plan on you know, one day figuring out what you want to do in your life.

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hopefully, you're happy, we're almost done the chapter of divorce as well, because we almost are and so we're gonna finish off divorce and hold on today. And then we'll look at the data from next week onwards, inshallah Tada. And we'll probably finish up there in the next week. And then what we'll do is we'll begin two weeks from now we will begin the chapter on business transactions. So

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how to do business, according to Islam, what's permissible, what's not permissible. And I can see that we have our good friend, brother, Othman from, from Manchester, England, who's on with us right now. And he's a specialist in Islamic financing, banking and financing. And so, you know, probably hit him up a couple of times to get some,

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some some info that I might be missing out on and maybe even share that platform with a few people to try and get their,

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you know, their expertise shared with our community in sha Allah.

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Okay, so today we're going to carry on where we left off, we were talking about divorce last week, and we started that off, we went into the types of divorce with respect to the wording and you know that we have the explicit wording as well as figuratively speaking, if someone says something, and does that actually mean divorce or lead to divorce itself.

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Today, we're going to be looking at the types of divorce with respect to the conditionality. So the wording of the of a divorce specifically

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could either imply that the divorce is immediate, right is happening immediately, or that it is conditional, okay? And we'll look at both of these inshallah, first off,

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if it means immediacy, for example, if someone says to their wife, if the husband says to his wife, you are divorced, right, then this type of divorce takes place immediately. As in it has just taken place and the wife is now divorced. Now of course within Islam we look at Okay, she's divorced, but what's next? And what really is next is the fact that

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you know there's there which we're gonna look at next week inshallah Okay, so once a men divorces his wife, there's a de and that itself will you know kick in for the next little while I'm just gonna move this camera over a little bit so that I can see the chat if anyone mentions anything there. Okay.

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So that's with regards to

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an immediate statement or a statement that is that refers to divorce taking place immediately.

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Then there's the conditional divorce.

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For example, if he says if you go to such and such place, you are divorced. Okay, so if you go to so and so place you are divorced. And the ruling concerning this type of divorce or this type of statement, is that if the husband intended by it, a statement of divorce, so if he intended to divorce when he mentioned this,

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then the divorce takes effect, when the condition is met. So if he is intending for her to be divorced, if she goes to Tim Hortons at 11:30pm night, and 11:30pm she goes to Tim Hortons Haas, she's divorced, right, but it is dependent upon the fact that she goes there or fulfills what was mentioned.

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If he's simply meant by this statement, however, a means of encouraging his wife to do something or to refrain from doing something right so someone is not happy you

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with, you know, something that's taking place and he says, look, you know, if you do this one more time, then you know, you're divorced. And so she says, Oh, you know what, I don't want to do that I don't want to be divorced, so I'm not gonna go there. And of course, this is where I need to remind, you know, brothers, do not think that you're playing mind games, and abusing your spouse by saying things like this or making these statements and forcing her into doing or not doing certain things. Like, if you don't give me a foot massage every single night, then you are divorced, like, What kind of nonsense is that? Honestly speaking, you know, so, I know it's nice to have a foot massage every

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single night, I would enjoy that as well. But it is very dangerous to do these kinds of things. And what you're doing is you are you know, blackmailing her into or forcing her into doing certain things you know, very well, she doesn't want to be divorced over something so silly and so dumb like that. So don't play games. Remember, we said last week, from the things that we are not allowed to joke around in or joke around with is divorce itself as well, right. So, whether it is said jokingly or seriously, it is serious, okay.

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So if you simply meant by the statement, a means of encouraging his wife to do something or to refrain from doing something that is simply an oath. If the condition was not fulfilled, then nothing occurred and the husband does not have to do anything about his oath. However, if the condition is fulfilled, then the husband must expiate for breaking his oath. Okay.

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What do we mean by oath? Well, he said he would do something, and if he doesn't do it, right, then he has to

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you know,

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expiate for the sin that he's committed, they're taking an oath and not following through with it. This is the opinion of shareholders Some even Tamia or I'ma holla which is found in much more fatawa

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a very famous very long book of fatawa by even though Tamia a document Allah, now we move on to the types of divorce with respect to if it is done according to the Sunnah or if it is done against the Sunnah or innovated, okay, as we know to be called a bita. Okay, so we've now gone into a few different levels or phases of divorce, right? So there's a few things we looked at divorce. Okay.

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And then we looked at, whether it's the first divorce or the second divorce or the third divorce, we also looked at the types of divorce was with respect to the wording so either

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explicit or definitive, sorry, figurative. And then we looked at the types of divorce with respect to the conditionality. Right now we're looking at the types of divorce with respect to the Miss city, according to Islam, was this done correctly or not? Is it according to the Sunnah or not according to the Sunnah.

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So divorce is also divided into the divorce done according to the Sunnah and the divorce done in an innovational manner, okay in a way that is a bit odd that is not from the teachings of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, the divorce that is done according to the son that is where in the husband divorces his wife, obviously

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with whom he had consummated the marriage. Okay, so he was married to her, and he divorces her he consummated this marriage with her

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one time during a time of her purity, so he pronounces the divorce once when she's pure as an after her period has ended.

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During her time of purity, concerning which the two did not have any sexual relations, okay, so

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to simplify, this is when a husband divorces his wife, after her period has ended, and they have not been sexually active during that time that her period ended until the divorce took place. So whether it's a day or two days or three days or near the end of that cycle, the point there is that the men pronounces divorce to his wife. He says at one time

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after she finished her period, as in she's pure from her period, and they have not been sexually active from the time that her period ended until the time that he

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pronounce divorced her. I hope that makes sense. Okay. I know sometimes these things can be a little bit technical, but that's just the way it is right? And it's all up here. So it takes a lot of a lot of memory, space to keep a lot of these things in place. And this is why sometimes when people come in, and they ask a question about divorce, or people will call and say, so I'm going to come to you. So this happened last night. Am I divorced? Well, wait a second, what was said? How is it said have that has this been said to you before? A key question, anyone who gets who gets, you know, a phone call or an email who receives it receives a phone call, or anyone who's being consulted? You know,

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am I divorced? One of the first first first questions that should be asked is

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have you been divorced before? Or has your husband pronounced divorce to you in the past?

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And if the answer is no, okay, then that's simple. We don't need to worry about the past. If the answer is yes, then we need to

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look at a few things. Okay. We need to

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find out now. Oh, you have been divorced in the past? Okay. How many times? Were you divorced in the past? Explain to me how that divorce took place in the past? When was it? And when was the next time? Right? What was the time period between it? Now I know a lot of people will say well, it doesn't really matter what the time period is. Well, it might not matter to you. But when you look at it, and you try to figure out how things have been going in the marriage, you know, from an outsider's perspective, you sort of get an idea as to whether this marriage is one that you know, divorces is constantly being blurted out, or is it you know, this is serious? Okay. I know some

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cases of people where they can't even count how many times they've been divorced. Right? Or brothers will say I don't remember how many times I've divorced her I divorced her so common and so often. And he's just like, Well, wait a second, slowly roll. You know, like,

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divorce is only twice in Islam. Like we learned in the third time call us it's over. Right. So you're married, divorced, married, not married, divorced, married, divorced, but you're married. Divorce happened, took her back divorce happened, took her back. And if divorce happens that third time hot us. So brothers who are on this, you know, Highway to I don't want to say Highway to Heaven.

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You know, Highway to divorce. So Pamela you got to slow down a little bit. Okay.

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So getting back to what we were saying.

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A divorce from a husband to his wife.

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That is pronounced once. That doesn't mean that it has not been

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that it has not happened in the past. We're saying that he says divorce wants not like a divorce, a divorce, a Divorce, Divorce, Divorce, Divorce, a divorce, you had divorce, you had divorcing with 1000 times. It's like whoa, okay. So husband divorces his wife once as in one statement of divorce

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after her period has ended, and they have not been sexually active from that time until the divorce is pronounced.

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Allah subhana wa tada says the divorce is twice after that. Either you retain her on reasonable terms or release her with kindness as we saw in sort of two bacara verse number 229. We learned that last week. Allah subhanho wa Taala also says all profit when you divorce women divorce them in their head.

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Yeah. Are you gonna be either bollock woman Nisa for paliku one layer identity? hiner What? Absolutely. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam says when you divorce women divorce them in their eyes. Okay, as in during the right time right after the period has ended. And we see that in the son of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam. So the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam explained this verse, When it'd be normal. The son of automotive, no football, or the lower end divorced his wife while she was menstruating, so she still had her period and he divorced her

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arm would have no hot dog, his father goes to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and asked the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam about what had taken place and the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam replied, order him to take her back, and then to keep her until she becomes pure.

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she becomes pure,

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and then has her menses again, and then becomes pure then it

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Few wills he may keep her afterwards as in, continue on in the marriage, or he may divorce her before he touches her. This is the period of which Allah has ordered women to be divorced. So we see there that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam indicates now the timing of divorce is when a woman's period has ended, and they and she's pure now and no sexual activity has taken place between the two of them. An innovational divorce.

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A divorce that is not according to the Sunnah of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam is any divorce that contradicts what is legally sanctioned. And when we say legally here, we're talking about islamically sanctioned according to the Shetty law,

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such as divorcing one's wife while she is still having her menstrual, her menses

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during a period of purity, in which the two had had sexual relations, or two state three divorces in one setting. Okay, so these are examples of a time when it is not according to the Sunday I'll go back and mention that he divorced that is not according to the son of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam that contradicts what we find in the Shetty what we find in Islam.

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For example, divorcing one's wife while she is having her period. Okay, so she's still on her period, as we saw in the previous example of the son of amagno, huddled

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during a period of purity in which the two have had sexual relations. So her period ended, they were sexually active, and then he divorces her. Okay, that's not according to the dean. what he's supposed to do is if he wants to divorce her is to wait because they were sexually active within that month, to wait until she has her period again. And then she's pure from her period, and takes her closer, and then divorces her before being sexually active once again. And another example that we mentioned as well is to state three divorces in one setting. Her husband wants to divorce his wife and he says, a divorce you had divorce, you had divorce you or you are divorced, you are

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divorced, you are divorced, okay?

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Or I divorce you three times, right to say stuff like that.

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Those are examples of when a divorce has taken place

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in a sinful manner.

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So has the divorce taking place? islamically, we would say yes, the divorce has taken place, but it has taken place in a sinful manner, not according to the way of Islam.

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If he divorces her while she was menstruating, and this is where some people will say, Okay, well, she was on her period. So the divorce doesn't count. Wait a second, okay. If she did, if he divorces her while she's menstruating, the divorce has taken place.

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If she is qualified to be taken back, as in, it was only the first or the second divorce. Okay, it was only the first or the second divorce. So when we say if she's qualified to be taken back, that's because it's not the third time she's been divorced. Third time it's done. Sorry, you can't take her back. So if she is qualified to be taken back, she has to be taken back until she becomes pure again, has her menses again, and then becomes pure once again.

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At that time, he may either keep her

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as in retain the marriage and try to make the marriage work. Or he may divorce her

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before being sexually active with her.

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How do we know this? Well, this is how the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam ordered the nonmetal de la Horan to behave Okay, what he ordered him to do. The proof that such a divorce does occur is in

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what amount of Bahati criminal law recorded from Saudi Arabia from this from even Arma on the lower end of a man himself who said I was considered sorry, it was considered one divorce upon me.

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So it was considered a divorce. And then, you know, the scholars have sort of written about that even highjacking Allah explains that in fact wholebody the explanation to Sahih Bukhari Okay, let's move on three divorces. Okay. Three divorces.

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If I

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Husband divorces his wife, three times in one sentence, or three times in one setting.

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Let me explain this.

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If a husband divorces his wife three times in one sentence, so he says, I divorced you, I divorce you, I divorce you. Or he says, You are divorced, you are divorced, you are divorced, or he says i divorce you three times.

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three times in one setting. So they're having an argument and he says, I divorced you. And then they're arguing and arguing, arguing 510 15 minutes later, he's like, I divorce you. And then you know, 20 3040 minutes later, they're still arguing five hours later, sometimes people arguing for five or six hours. Now I'll help every single one of us not to argue that much. I mean, you know, a long period of time later or you know, a few minutes later, he says, I divorced you a third time again.

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That setting as in that argument has not ended. So the setting like the scene in a movie or in a play in a theater, right? The scene is set and what's happening is these two people are arguing and oh he says they divorce you and they're still arguing and he yells it out again a divorce you and then they're still going on. I divorce you.

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That is one setting. And we would consider that islamically as one divorce and not three divorces because it's being said three in one or three times all together in one sentence or three times in one setting. Okay in one setting.

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Imam Muslim Rahim Allah recorded that bus are the Allahu anhu ma said during the time of the Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam during the time of Abu Bakar De La Hoya and, and the first two years of amagno hubub. Three divorces stated at once was considered one divorce. So during the time of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam throughout his time and into the field of abubaker, or the Allahu, and, and then into the

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field of, I'm going to ignore up until two years into his

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into his his time as as the Amir

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divorce mentioned multiple times in one setting or one sentence was considered one. Now people are for sure asking themselves this question. What happened after those two years? Why is it that during those two during the years of the time of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam during the time of Abu Bakar on the low end is a Khalifa and the first two years of Armada know football is a halifa divorce mentioned more than one time in one setting was considered one divorce. Why is it that after that it was not considered one divorce? Well, arama didn't know what Bob then said that people are making haste isn't they're rushing in something that should take time. And maybe we should enforce

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this upon them. So he enforced that upon them. And that was the opinion of Ramadan, armo, no hubbub

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about the alohar. And that was something of his own opinion that he decided on for his people during his time.

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But remember, in Islam, the marriage is supposed to

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be assisted as and we're supposed to try and help to make that marriage work. Right, try to work at maintaining that relationship for the sake of family, for the sanity of the people, for the children and so on. But again, I say this very lightly as well, because there are some people who are in marriages that should have. And honestly, in many of the cases that I've dealt with, I could say that there are some people who are in marriages that should have

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been divorced long ago,

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but are not because they're like, oh, the children, the children, they're worried about certain things. And really, when you talk to their children, their children are hating their parents, sometimes, their children are really upset that their parents can't resolve their differences. their parent, their children are sometimes upset that their parents can't just be adults. I've had teenage you know, children of parents tell me I wish my parents could just act like grown ups. SubhanAllah Why? Because they're like, you know, they have so many issues in their marriage. Why can't they just resolve it? Why can't they just sorted out? And I know sometimes we think oh, but children don't

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know to be honest.

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Sometimes parents don't know what children are going through. Right? Sometimes parents don't realize what they're putting their children through and how much their children are suffering in a household where the parents are just not happy, and they're bitter. And they're arguing and they complain, and they backbite about each other all the time. It's not healthy. And this is where sometimes children no more than their parents, and are more brave than their parents and are just waiting to move on in life and have some clarity.

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And may Allah subhanho wa Taala, help every single one of us and help our children as well, because it's not easy. It's definitely not easy. And I know people are saying, Oh, yeah, do you think is that easy for people to get divorced? No, I know, it's not easy. I know, it's not easy. And people who have come to me know that I will be the one to try and help them. See through the darkness to try and figure out a way to get through that hard, difficult time or those hard difficult times in your marriage. Because it's worth it. It's worth it to try, right? It's worth it to try and we ask Allah Subhana Allah to Allah to make it easy.

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Okay, we move on the types of divorce with respect to being re vocable or irrevocable. And I think you all pretty much know this. Now irrevocable, we've spoken about before, you know, someone divorced three times, you move on, Sorry, buddy, you can't re marry your wife or your ex wife, because you've divorced her so many times now that you can't marry her until she goes and gets married to someone else, consummate that marriage lives with that person, and the marriage doesn't work out and they get divorced. And then, you know, sometime later after, you know, she's interested in re marrying you. And we're not gonna we're not going to talk about that any further. Now we're

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going to look at the revocable divorce. The revocable divorce is that which takes place after the marriage has been consummated.

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was not in exchange for wealth

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and is preceded by No, or only one other divorce.

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So again, this is all very technical. We know it. So if you ever have issues, you ask us, we'll tell you. But again, it's very simple. So the revocable divorce is basically a divorce where marriage has taken place, and it was consummated. So the marriage was consummated. The reason why we say this is because if if the marriage is not working out before the to have consummated it, we can simply a no, the marriage returns the mode and philosophy to move on. And that's it. Right? If the marriage was consummated, the Mahal is hers. Okay? She is

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deserving of that motto, it is hers, it belongs to her. It has to be paid to her, okay, or given to her or transferred to her or whatever the motto is, right? So it's not always going to be money for some people.

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that divorce that takes place after a marriage after it's been consummated, and there was no previous divorce to it, or there was one previous divorce. Okay, and this is the second so it's either the first or the second divorce, then this is revocable, as in the divorce takes place, but you can take her back. What we mean by take her back is that you can try to make that marriage work again. Okay? You can reconcile and continue on in the marriage without a nica without a marriage without anything additional, as long as it's done within the time of their death. Okay. So as long as the reconciliation happens before that is completely over.

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The woman who, sorry, Allah Subhana, Allah said, in the earn the divorces twice after that, either you retain her on reasonable terms or release her with kindness. The woman who is revoke doubly divorced remains the men's wife as long as she is in her waiting period. So when a men does divorce his wife, and when we say divorce here, of course, we're talking about islamically according to the Shetty law, and the legal process has not been completed. Okay. So we're talking about it from an Islamic perspective. We're not talking about it from the legal perspective of whatever country it is that you live in, because I know we're doing this online now. And so whatever country you're in,

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remember, you still have to go through that legal process.

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And it's just the way it is. Okay? So we're just talking about it from an Islamic perspective. I'm not a lawyer, I'm not here telling you what's legal, what's not legal.

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That's that's for, for, you know someone else to help you with.

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So the woman who is revoked, doubly divorced remains the man's wife as long as she is in her waiting period that. So for example, a husband

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divorces his wife, because her period ended, and they have not been sexually active. And so he pronounces divorce to her

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and tomorrow, and next month, and the month after, and the month after that. So three months, three menstrual cycles have to pass, right.

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She says still his wife.

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They're still technically married.

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Divorce was pronounced, but islamically. It doesn't take place until the three months are over as in that the periods the waiting period is over.

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when a husband says I divorce you, a wife islamically is not immediately divorced. The divorce process immediately happened and takes place. But she is not divorced on the spot. She's still his wife, and he's still her husband.

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The ADA has to pass

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and then she's officially divorced. And he's no longer her husband.

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hope that makes sense. Because a lot of people come in and ask or they'll call an email and say my husband divorced me last night.

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And then they'll go Oh, my ex husband divorced me last night. No, he's still your husband until there has completed okay?

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Allah Subhana Allah says in the Quran

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verse number 228 in sort of Baccarat Ruby learn him in a shape on you have ology one mobile loquat we must not be

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foreseen joku one.

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II mean.

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Now you mean you

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were born to

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help God in a fiza and he can in

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his love slur.

00:33:03--> 00:33:44

Allah subhana wa tada here says, first number 228 of Soto through Bukhara. He says and divorced women shall wait with regards to their marriage for three menstrual periods. And it is not lawful for them to conceal what Allah has created in their rooms in their room as w o MBS. It is not lawful for them to conceal what a law has created in their rooms. If they believe in Allah in the last day, and their husbands have the better right to take them back in that period if they wish for reconsideration. Why? Well, Allah subhanho wa Taala

00:33:47--> 00:33:54

puts the idea in place that three months or three menstrual cycles

00:33:56--> 00:33:58

that time is put in place

00:34:01--> 00:34:57

to assure well before that, it's put in place to assist the husband and wife to realize that they've had so much more between them of goodness, and maybe they can try and make it work and so they reconcile in addition to that, and there's many reasons but in addition to that Allah subhana wa tada puts that time in place to either identify whether that wife is pregnant or not. And this is why Allah subhana wa tada says that it's not lawful for her to conceal what she has in her womb. If she is pregnant, he has to know she has to tell him because it's his child. Okay. And this is a way that Allah subhana wa tada uses to identify if someone is pregnant, right. Then it is identified to

00:34:57--> 00:35:00

the spouse to the husband that you are the father of

00:35:00--> 00:35:03

This child that you know she has in her womb

00:35:04--> 00:35:45

and she can't put that child off onto someone else's shoulders or make it seem like the child belongs to someone else. Let's say after she finishes that by a few days she goes and re marries someone else and then a child is born and she says, oh, the child is born premature. No. Okay, so Allah subhanho wa Taala puts a decent amount of time so that you know if there is a pregnancy usually after three months you start to notice that right in terms of physique, but of course you know the period won't be there. It'll be missed the first month miss the second month Holocaust that means divorce is not happening right now. Okay.

00:35:50--> 00:35:53

Hola. Okay, let's get into the hula

00:35:55--> 00:36:02

what is the definition of a hula hula comes from the word implying removing one's garment right so

00:36:05--> 00:36:09

if Allah now like right, remove your slippers,

00:36:10--> 00:36:13

you know, so back remove your throat.

00:36:14--> 00:36:23

So hold on comes from the word implying removing one's garment. And remember Allah subhana wa tada says one nanny basler como

00:36:24--> 00:36:47

Tony Lieber Sula, one. So Allah Subhana, WA tada mentions that they are a covering or Libous, right garment clothing to cover you, and you are the same for them. So the whole idea is basically removing that cover is like you were married and the cover was put on and the color is removing that cover.

00:36:49--> 00:36:57

The jurists have defined it as a men's sorry, a men separates from his wife in exchange for something that he takes from her.

00:36:58--> 00:37:10

What is he taking from her? He's taking back the mother, if she requests a hula, so hula is when the wife requests an annulment of her marriage. Okay.

00:37:12--> 00:37:22

In return for her being free from this marriage, she returns the hula. Sorry, she returns the mouth.

00:37:26--> 00:37:59

What is the legal status of this? If the discord between the two spouses becomes strong, and there's no way to bring about a reconciliation between the two. At the same time, the wife desires to separate so there's no reconciliation, but the wife is the one who decides I want out of this marriage, okay. It is permissible for her to request a hula howl from her husband, and she would then have to repay or give him back whatever was exchanged to her as a Mahalo

00:38:00--> 00:38:49

for the harm that he will face due to their separation. Right. So whatever it is that he needs that back for, and again, Ken, this is a question that comes up all the time. Can a husband forgive her of the mahoto? When she requests a cola? And the answer to that is yes, he can, but he can. It's his right. If he wants to. He can grant it if he doesn't want to he could say no, it's my right. He can say it is my right islamically to receive this back. Okay, we were spending our lives together and and you you want to go off and live your life and do whatever it is that you want to do in your life. Well, you know that that is my right to have back. You know what I gave you as a mom. There's

00:38:49--> 00:38:55

a difference between what was given as a mom and what was given as gifts.

00:38:57--> 00:39:00

And we'll leave that for another day. chama

00:39:01--> 00:39:05

Allah Subhana Allah says one or two Baccarat verse number 229.

00:39:06--> 00:39:08

Well, Lola come

00:39:13--> 00:39:14

day two to move on.

00:39:16--> 00:39:16

She and

00:39:23--> 00:39:59

her daughter who are in fifth to up him who do dumb, he fed a Juna and he FIM f dead be Allah subhanho wa Taala says, and it is not lawful for you, as in for the men to take back from your wives any of your mahato that you gave to them, except when both parties fear that they would be unable to keep the limits ordained by a law and I'll explain this in a bit.

00:40:00--> 00:40:17

Then if you fear that they would not be able to keep the limits ordained by Allah, then there is no sin in either of them if she gives back the Maha job, or a part of it, for her separation in that marriage,

00:40:18--> 00:40:25

Does that makes sense? Even our births are the Longhorn humor narrated that the wife of fair bit in case in some

00:40:26--> 00:41:08

of the alohar and came to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam and said or messenger of Allah, I have no complaint against that with respect to his religion, or his character, but I fear being ungrateful Subhan Allah, Allah subhana wa tada says, If you fear that they would not be able to keep the limits ordained by a law from the limits ordained by a law is that the wife is grateful and thankful for what the husband is providing her with, looking after her paying for the housing, paying for transportation, looking after the food and giving her a home to live in and peace and so on and so forth.

00:41:09--> 00:41:20

She says to the Prophet sallallahu Davis, I'm a messenger of Allah. I have no complaint against savate with respect to his religion or his character, but I fear for being ungrateful.

00:41:22--> 00:41:29

The Messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, will you return to him his garden? He had given her a garden as a motto.

00:41:31--> 00:41:32

She said yes,

00:41:34--> 00:41:55

she returned it to him, and he ordered him to separate from her. So the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam asked her will you return them a hub, she agreed to returning them a hub. So she returned them out. And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam ordered him to leave. And he is no longer married to her the marriage is no and Floyd. Okay.

00:41:58--> 00:42:21

hula is a dissolution or dismissing or an nullifying the marriage, and it is not a divorce. Okay, I mentioned this before, and I'll just reiterate it here. If the woman frees herself from the marriage through a COLA and separates from her husband,

00:42:23--> 00:42:41

then she is in charge of herself as in she's making that decision to move on and she's free from the marriage. This kind of separation is not a type of divorce. So it is not a Divorce, Divorce comes from the husband whole outcomes from the wife, okay?

00:42:42--> 00:42:50

This kind of separation is not and when we say separation, we don't mean go into a state of separation, we mean

00:42:51--> 00:43:35

spouses separating from each other, for the purpose of either being divorced, or the marriage being nullified. Not just living apart, but still being married. Okay, I spoke about that last week. I don't want anyone to be confused about it. So this kind of separation is not a type of divorce, even if it is stated with the same terminology. So even if the wife comes and request a holla, and it is written in English, the wife has requested a divorce from her husband. Even if the word divorce is there, it's islamically not considered a divorce because divorces what's granted from the husband to the wife. And an annulment is what the wife requests from her husband

00:43:37--> 00:43:39

showing or indicating the differences there.

00:43:41--> 00:43:43

It is dissolution

00:43:44--> 00:43:51

of the marriage contract in the interest of the woman in exchange for some wealth that she gives up, right, the mob.

00:43:53--> 00:44:06

A few things to point out and I don't want to make it any longer than we already have. It is confirmed within the Quran and the Sunnah of the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasallam as well as consensus that

00:44:07--> 00:44:32

one cannot take one's wife back after a holiday. So a husband cannot reconcile with his wife and take her back after the hula is granted. So if she comes to the husband and says I want an annulment of this marriage, I want to hold her. There's two ways that this can happen. First of all, he agrees to it, which is the easiest way and save so much time.

00:44:33--> 00:44:36

And headache. Lots of headache.

00:44:38--> 00:44:43

But that's very, very, very rare. Okay, it's very rare.

00:44:44--> 00:44:52

Usually a husband will say no chance, no chance. And that's okay because

00:44:53--> 00:44:59

islamically what we want to do here is we want to give them chances. So

00:45:00--> 00:45:10

What imams who understand this situation will usually encourage to do is when the husband and wife come to the man, for example, they'll come to me and the wife says, I want to call her.

00:45:13--> 00:45:31

And the husband's like, no chance, I'm not granting a call out No way. It's usually because of ego. It's like he's going, I'm not giving into what she wants. If she wants to end this marriage, and I will divorce her, that's okay. Because that's better. For a number of reasons. First of all, she gets to keep them.

00:45:32--> 00:45:39

In most cases, the wife was not working. And so for her keeping them at home, that's a positive thing for her.

00:45:41--> 00:45:49

In addition to that, which I would say, this is the number one reason why I would encourage the husband divorce her and not

00:45:50--> 00:46:06

her seek Hola. And I explained this to them all the time. I never keep the secret, I always tell them, Look, it's in your favor. It's in your best interest for you as the husband to divorce your wife. He's like, why I don't get my mother back. Yes.

00:46:07--> 00:46:08

But you then have the time of that.

00:46:10--> 00:46:11

to reconcile.

00:46:12--> 00:46:24

You have three months, where she might realize this was a mistake. And he might realize No, no, you know, what, what is it that you want to want me to work on in this marriage, I'll work on it. Well, let's make this marriage work.

00:46:26--> 00:46:39

that it does is really important. But if the hula takes place, if she requests a hula and says, I want an annulment of this marriage, I want out and he says, I agree to it, I grant you a cola.

00:46:40--> 00:46:45

It's done. She has to return the Mahal, okay.

00:46:46--> 00:46:47

And there

00:46:48--> 00:46:50

is only one month.

00:46:51--> 00:47:44

And there is no reconciliation after the whole law is agreed upon. Or granted. So there, like I said, there's two ways either he agrees to it, or he doesn't agree to it. And she has to go to a panel of emails or scholars or godly, right to depending on the country, you live in a judge who will then decide as to whether this marriage, or this request has any basis, right. And if it does, and He grants are the panel of emails, or scholars or judges, whoever it is, and don't come to me, I will not and have not, and will not grant anyone a whole hour, it is not something for one person to do. I think that because there are so many different complex things that happen in a marriage, there

00:47:44--> 00:47:48

should be three at least Imams, or,

00:47:49--> 00:48:13

you know, scholars or whoever is put in that role that responsibility to analyze their marriage and see whether there is basis for this whole or not. Some people will say, well, that's too lengthy. That's too long. Yes, sadly, you're waiting on people. And for some, for some cases, it's like, Hey, you know, you're not living in my shoes, you don't know what I'm going through, understood.

00:48:16--> 00:48:32

It's just part of the challenges that we that we experienced as Muslims living in in countries where we don't have an Islamic legal system, you know, governing and, and helping and assisting in these ways. It's, it's just a challenge of our time. So to recap,

00:48:34--> 00:48:35

the whole hour

00:48:40--> 00:48:53

can happen in two ways. She requests it and he grants it, or she requests it and he refuses and then she has to go and have it granted to her by you know, the Imam, the judge and so on and so forth.

00:48:54--> 00:49:06

The era that is one month, there is no reconciliation, no chance of reconciliation during that there is merely a time after the holiday is granted.

00:49:07--> 00:49:07


00:49:09--> 00:49:16

make sure that there's there's no pregnancy and to you know, give a little bit of buffer time there and to move on. Okay.

00:49:17--> 00:49:19

And that's with regards to

00:49:20--> 00:49:21


00:49:22--> 00:49:26

and that's where we'll end for today, inshallah Tada, okay.

00:49:27--> 00:49:49

Next week, we will look at the data and talk about that a little bit and we might even get into the next chapter. If we have some time. It'll probably be a little bit shorter next week or we'll do a longer q&a session inshallah. So if anyone has any questions, feel free to write them in the comments or chat, you know, section there, and we'll get to it in a second. inshallah.

00:50:03--> 00:50:03


00:50:05--> 00:50:16

So I see a question up here in some cultures, a husband divorces his wife and throws her out of his house or asks her parents to come and take her as humiliation to them. Is this even allowed?

00:50:20--> 00:50:20


00:50:24--> 00:50:27

It's not allowed. islamically. Like I said earlier,

00:50:30--> 00:50:35

when a husband pronounces divorced to his wife, they are still married.

00:50:37--> 00:50:54

The statement of divorce has taken place, but the marriage is not over until the death is over. Okay. And they are to remain living together. And we spoke about this last week and the week before. So they are to remain living together.

00:50:56--> 00:51:11

To try and encourage that reconciliation takes place. What we see happening sometimes is that husband and wife as soon as the husband says, a divorce you they move out from each other's homes, or, you know, whatever one of the two moves out, at least.

00:51:13--> 00:51:45

And then there's no window, or no opportunity for reconciliation. And that's where it becomes problematic Is that likely, so they're to remain in the same home and even remain living in the same room as in they should go to bed at night in the same room. They shouldn't separate like where the husband is sleeping in the basement or the wife is sleeping in the basement. Now this is in general, or generally speaking, when there's no physical violence, no abuse happening and stuff like that. Of course, if there's something exceptional that's taking place then

00:51:47--> 00:51:50

as a completely different story, completely, completely different story.

00:51:54--> 00:52:10

Pamela in one of the cases women married someone without parents consent wrong, but someone did their Nika abusive relationship. Then after some time, a team gets involved girl concepts has helped line the team forces the guy to accept hold on releases the girl to get married ASAP. Okay.

00:52:12--> 00:52:13

interesting case.

00:52:15--> 00:52:17

Okay, wait.

00:52:21--> 00:52:23

Oh, you were replying to someone?

00:52:25--> 00:52:41

So there's another question up here. Is it true that a wife can ask the right to a divorce? Not hold up? But same style as a husband divorcing in her Nika contract? Yes, it is true. So a wife can say to her husband, and if she doesn't want to ask for a holiday, she can say

00:52:42--> 00:52:49

divorce me. I want you to divorce me. He can say okay, I will divorce you. Or he can say no.

00:52:51--> 00:53:11

If you don't want to remain in this marriage, then request a holla. Okay, so, again, remember, in Islam, we're supposed to communicate on good terms, right? We're even though we're talking about ending a marriage, sometimes ending the marriage is a good thing. Right? Like we said before, sometimes ending the marriage is a good thing. So

00:53:12--> 00:53:20

they should communicate, and not just yell and scream and argue back and forth at each other. Okay. I don't know why the screen is like this today.

00:53:22--> 00:53:35

Do Canadian laws distribute money half regardless of who is asking divorce? In that case, if wife got hold on than money wife get would be Helen.

00:53:37--> 00:53:38

Okay, so

00:53:40--> 00:53:40


00:53:44--> 00:53:57

that's the law. Okay. So when you live when you live in a country and the laws are upon you, then that's the way it is. If the wife says islamically, I'm not entitled to this, and I don't want it. So now.

00:53:59--> 00:54:14

A lot of people think when it comes to divorce, that the court or the judge will tell you what you have to do by law. And there's only one way and it's a cookie cutter way and that's it. No, that's not how it works in Canada. In fact, the the the Divorce Laws are, are

00:54:15--> 00:55:00

are very interesting, where the divorce process is very interesting in in Canada, it allows for room to discuss if the husband and wife come to their own terms and agreement, and they both agree to it, then that can legally be put in place. Now, again, I'm not a lawyer, so go seek legal advice. But from what I know, based on working with a few cases and talking to lawyers and asking about this is that if they come to a Separation Agreement, or you know their their divorce agreement between the two of them, whatever the two parties agree to, as long as there's no harm or nothing, you know, to be concerned

00:55:00--> 00:55:07

About, it can vary. It can be very different. The wife might say, I want nothing from him. Let's just get divorced.

00:55:08--> 00:55:28

Right? Or she says, I want a cola. And I want nothing from him. And so the legal system would not say, Oh, no, but you have to take 50% of his wealth. She could say, I don't want that. I don't want anything from him. I agree to simply get divorced and move on. And that's it. Okay. So,

00:55:29--> 00:55:36

again, get a lawyer discuss this, okay. I'm not a lawyer. I'm not going to talk the legal side of things. We're talking the aesthetic side of things today. Okay.

00:55:37--> 00:55:41

There's a question here. Just make sure you didn't miss anything above

00:55:44--> 00:55:51

what a woman or couples should do when husband gives only one time bollock.

00:55:52--> 00:55:58

Okay. What do you mean by what should a woman or a couple do when the husband gives only one time bollock?

00:56:00--> 00:56:22

What they do is they remain living together. The divorce was pronounced. It doesn't take effect until there is over. And there is the ability to reconcile within that data. And if they do, then they can continue to be married but strike one has happened. Okay.

00:56:45--> 00:56:48

Okay, so I think rather artifact.

00:56:49--> 00:57:01

I'm not too sure if you're just mentioning a case that has happened or if you're asking a question if you're asking a question, I don't really know what the question is. It's not really clear to me.

00:57:02--> 00:57:12

So if anyone has any other questions, feel free to type it in inshallah we'll give you another little bit of time. I know sometimes we have some questions and they don't come to mind right away.

00:57:16--> 00:57:18

Okay, now we're saying yes, yes to what?

00:57:20--> 00:57:22

Mashallah about our karma.

00:57:26--> 00:57:36

And someone saying said Mr. La Concha y la como Santa Monica de la he over cattle, I hope you're doing well. As one said Mr. eniko. Hope you're good as well.

00:57:37--> 00:57:45

I'm just mentioning how many girls help women even when religion is used to keep on a marriage. Okay, um, the law.

00:57:46--> 00:57:58

Here's another question. Someone a converter I think was sent him. How long is the idea if the woman is at an old age where she is not menstruating? Three months?

00:57:59--> 00:58:01

Okay, three months.

00:58:04--> 00:58:09

Now, Hasib is asking how am I doing? A lot of UCLA

00:58:12--> 00:58:17

I'm doing good on the law a little tired. busy. been

00:58:18--> 00:58:51

working since four jobs today, Sundays. I like that. All right. I have the youth program in the morning. So I was preparing my slides discussing, we spoke about music and the ruining of music and lyrics and songs and nasheeds and singing today with our youth. So it was it was a long one. And it's been a long day. So I started sitting at this desk right after fudger and was here pretty much most of the day except for the times I was at the masjid for whatever I needed to get done while I was there as well.

00:58:56--> 00:59:02

So, she has to complete her. But can they reconcile and how long will they

00:59:03--> 00:59:05

be when divorce only one time so there

00:59:06--> 00:59:10

is three months or three menstrual cycles, okay.

00:59:11--> 00:59:25

She does not have to complete their eye in order to reconcile they can reconcile within those three months. They can reconcile Two hours later, One hour later, five minutes later, right or five days later, 10 days later. And

00:59:26--> 00:59:44

the idea for the first divorce like we said is three menstrual cycles are three months. Okay, like we mentioned, if the husband has disappeared for 24 years, and now he is begging to compensate you for the time he left you and your child? Is this compensation halaal

00:59:45--> 00:59:47

if he wants to give you something

00:59:49--> 00:59:59

he's looking at it as hate and goodness and sadaqa It is helpful and it would be helpful. If he has no issues whatsoever. He's like, Look, you

01:00:00--> 01:00:18

remarried, you are you didn't remarry, you moved on you did whatever, you know, but he feels that, you know, guilt or he feels bad or he whatever he feels within him and he wants to share or he wants to give something, then yes, that would be helpful and permissible. And feel free to leave some of it for me as well.

01:00:20--> 01:00:21

Just joking.

01:00:22--> 01:00:24

But yes, it would be permissible.

01:00:27--> 01:00:30

Yes, class was amazing. Just like hello. Which class are you referring to?

01:00:32--> 01:00:34

undiscovered Isabel? Okay.

01:00:35--> 01:00:41

I don't know if that's a wave or clap and then mocked up from Sydney, Australia. Hello, evatik feek.

01:00:42--> 01:00:52

Someone's asking, Can you join the youth program? Sorry. If I were too old to join the youth program, even I can't join it. If I registered, they wouldn't accept my registration. Okay.

01:00:54--> 01:00:55

It's for teenagers only.

01:00:57--> 01:00:59

question, how long have you been?

01:01:01--> 01:01:05

Or how long time How have you been? Okay? I was like, how long? What do you mean how long?

01:01:06--> 01:01:41

a nun by a shell. Lots of article. Ah, so the last time in the first part of the pandemic, people started asking me how I was. And that was because one of my students asked one of our students here in the masjid when everyone's asking questions. What about this? What about that? islamically this and that. This student said, Shay, how you doing? How are things with you? And I was so touched by that. I literally went to his home right after we got offline and I gifted him the watch that I was wearing.

01:01:43--> 01:01:50

And so I'm wondering now if some of these some of these guys are asking how I'm doing because they want my watch.

01:01:51--> 01:02:02

And trust me you don't want the watch I'm wearing today. It's like five years old and the battery only lasts about five hours before it's dead. So you just really don't want this watch.

01:02:06--> 01:02:22

Did you try Tito on the new mic? I have and I recorded a little bit but I haven't kept the recordings. I deleted them because I'm just not ready with the settings yet. Zack Hello fending for making this difficult subject easy to understand a lady about a creek May Allah subhana wa tada make it easy on 100.

01:02:29--> 01:02:59

Okay, someone's asking, Is it is it a live stream? Yes, it is a live stream. So I'm gonna share my mother's saw you in hospital on Friday. Yes, I'm the law. I do chaplaincy at the hospital. And I did see your mother there and humbler we had a good, good long conversation. And Pamela you know, she shared some advice that I'll share with you as a community right now. For those of you that are on here, something that's not on topic, but very interesting for every single one of us to learn about.

01:03:02--> 01:03:16

I was at the hospital on Friday, I do chaplain I've been the chaplain at the hospital here in Milton for a few years now, I think about four years, four or five years. And I have never seen the staff

01:03:17--> 01:03:23

broken like they are now what I mean by this is they are

01:03:24--> 01:04:12

they are exhausted from COVID. And they have seen things they probably thought in their entire life working in a hospital, they wouldn't see this many deaths and this much complication and this much hardship. And what I was told by not just 123 or four, but a few of this staff was get the message out to our community members get the message out to people living, you know, in our in our town, stop house visits, stop these, you know, get togethers without people knowing like parking down the street and getting together having dinner and stuff like that, and stop traveling, stop traveling outside the country, somehow to LA.

01:04:14--> 01:04:25

The the condition of the ICU right now is full and not good. Because of the COVID patients that are there. And

01:04:26--> 01:04:37

what these doctors and nurses are going through. It's unbelievable. You know, family members are not able to come in and see their loved ones that are admitted due to COVID.

01:04:38--> 01:04:50

And the patients are just, they're tired, they're exhausted. And they're having such a hard time and they're dying. They're dying. And the nurses and doctors are like

01:04:52--> 01:04:56

and the chaplain as well was you know we were talking about it and they're just saying Subhanallah This is

01:04:58--> 01:04:59

the hardest time

01:05:00--> 01:05:05

Ever, even the staff is is in need of opening up and getting help. So

01:05:06--> 01:05:13

what I was asked to share with the community is take this seriously, stop, you know, the

01:05:14--> 01:05:44

underground meetings you could call it you know, get togethers at people's houses, stop traveling. You know, people go travel, they come back, they get COVID they're admitted in the hospital, they don't see their family, they die, then their family members feel guilty. They feel sad, they regret you know, doing all the things that they weren't supposed to do, they were not supposed to do May Allah subhanho wa Taala make it easy, but honestly, you know, I'm sharing the message to get it out there that things are not good.

01:05:46--> 01:05:49

Just stay home. Okay, stay home.

01:05:51--> 01:06:04

How can you join the youth program, you simply go to the mustard website, which is akena And register there you'll see a registration link for the youth program, you need to be a teenager in order to register okay.

01:06:07--> 01:06:23

And someone's asking, Can you go to the hospital? Can Can we go with you? No, you can't come with me to the hospital. I'm I'm technically part of the staff because I have a security badge and ID badge.

01:06:25--> 01:07:10

And I can't bring anyone in with me and in fact the family members have the patients admitted in the hospital are not allowed to visit except those that have exceptional cases and permission to go in but not if they're COVID patients. So or their you know, relatives or our COVID patients it's only if they're you know in need of some sort of assistance from those family members so no, I can't bring anyone in with me Make dua for them. It's not wise to be going in these in places you know, it's not safe for everyone to just be going and walking around the best is stay put stop mingling stop mixing in with others. You know, do your part by making dua lots and lots of Dora inshallah

01:07:10--> 01:07:11


01:07:12--> 01:07:14

Jamil is asking tips for memorizing the Quran.

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Read it a lot.

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Here's a tip. I was thinking of this yesterday.

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get addicted to your earn, like people are addicted to their phones. And you'll memorize the Quran and inshallah in no time, right the addiction that people have myself included. The the connection we have with our phones is unbelievable. That if we had that much connection with the Quran, we would all be half of the Quran, sha Allah, Allah Subhana Allah knows best. May Allah protect each and every single person. I mean, all right, that's all the time that we have in sha Allah does not come alone Hainan for you know, being part of today's class. I hope that you know, it was beneficial. And we will finish off the chapter on marriage, which includes divorce next weekend,

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next Sunday inshallah at 8pm. When we look through the things related to it, okay, the waiting period there, which is fairly simple and straightforward. So we ask Allah subhana wa tada to grant us the ability to live until next week to go through these chapters and topics and to learn this Deen to be able to implement it and well hopefully we don't have to implement that idea in our lives. But if we have to, then we know how and what is needed to be done, and we can help others with it as well. I mean, chisako located on a bicycle, have you come or something Allahu wa sallam autocannon Amina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa salim

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