Nouman Ali Khan – Parent-Child Relationships

			It says half of Allahu Jenner who has the expression to lower your wings to lower your wings. Now
the problem with saying this guy lowered his wings is the first problem is the guy doesn't have
wings.
		

			What in the world does it mean to lower the wings? When you say to someone, you're lowering your
wings or you're raising your wings, or Rafa, Allahu Jana who have a brother who Janna who they use
both of them or Allah, Jana who he elevated his wings, then you're comparing a person to what
		

			you're comparing a person to a bird. You're comparing a person to a bird. So first understand that
comparison. When a bird raises its wings, what is it about to do?
		

			It's about to fly. When the raise low when the bird lowers its wings, it's about to land. So when
the bird is going up, it raises its wings. When the bird is going down, it lowers its wings, the
idea of lowering the wings has come back down to the earth, come back down to the earth land down.
Now obviously when a bird has wings, it has the ability to raise them anytime it wants. It has the
ability to to fly anytime it wants, but it still chooses to lower them. It's not forced to lower
them it can do it on it's it's a choice that it makes. This is an idea about our relationship with
our parents. Whilst we Allahumma Jana has the liminal Rama, lower for them for your mother and your
		

			father lower for them. The wings of humility. Allah added the word humility, we'll come back to that
in a second and do it out of love and mercy for them. Minute Rama
		

			now let's understand this a little bit. It's very powerful. When you were little,
		

			they did everything for you.
		

			When a bird is small, can it fly?
		

			No. The mother has to go and get all the food and bring it back to the nest for the chicks. Yes.
Because the bird itself does not have what yet. doesn't have wings yet. It can't fly on its own yet.
It's completely dependent on the parents. Are we like that when we're babies? Absolutely. We are
completely dependent on our parents. They clean us, they take us to the bathroom and clean us up, we
burp on them, we throw up on their clothes, and they wipe that off and still give us a hug anyway,
we cry over and over again. And they calm us down. They read they give us food, they give us drink,
they can protect us, they take us to the doctor, they give us medicine, they do all of it, all of
		

			it.
		

			Then we get older
		

			than our 20 or 30 or 40.
		

			And they get older too.
		

			And when they get older,
		

			they get weaker.
		

			But they don't just get weaker, they also get angrier.
		

			And they can also maybe hard to deal with for you.
		

			He can get annoyed very easily. It takes very little to agitate them.
		

			But now that you're 30 or you're 20 or you're 25 you have your own job, you have your own money, you
have your own car, you have your own family, you have your own everything, which means you can fly
on your own.
		

			You can raise your wings, can't you?
		

			Allah says when you're dealing with them. I know you have wings what you need to what?
		

			Lower though.
		

			And a duel actually means weakness. In other words, I know that you have powerful wings. But when
you're with your parents act like you don't have wings at all. Like they don't work.
		

			So you don't tell your parents you know, Dad, I'm an adult now. You can't talk to me like that
anymore.
		

			You don't mother.
		

			I'm in college, okay.
		

			Someone's saying that is raising their wings. Allah is saying, I got you. I know you got wings. I
know. Put them down.
		

			The idea is that a bird can fly and it still chooses to stay down.
		

			It still chooses to stay down.
		

			Now, why should you do it? He says me not Rama. Because of mercy. Because of mercy. Which actually
means three things. I'll mention at least three things to you. One.
		

			You should have love and mercy for your love and care. Remember Rama was loving care. Because of the
loving care they showed you. This is time for you to show love and care.
		

			This is now yes, they're annoying and they're loud. And they get easily angry and they argue with
you and they don't understand and they still criticize. Why are you doing this? Why are you driving
like that? Why are you sitting like that? Why did you buy that? Why are you moving over there? Why
are you getting that apartment? Why did you get that job? Why are you getting married? Why you name
your child that Why are you Why is your child going going to that school? Why why why why why why
why and you're like I can't run the time he explained to you okay, just let me live my life.
		

			You know
		

			what, you know what? A few years ago when you were like this?
		

			Your mom said
		

			Okay, time to go to the bathroom. Why?
		

			Time to eat? Why? Get in the car? Why?
		

			Why can I have everything? Why do you hate me? Why do you why do you why do you and you used to talk
a lot?
		

			And they put up with you? What does Allah do as the time goes by Allah reverses the roles.
		

			He reverses the roles. And actually that's not just me making that up. It's in the Quran, the role
the role reversal, I'll explain to you in a second. The first meaning of Minerva is the love and
care they showed you because of that loving care, you should show them loving care. The second
meaning of mineral Rama
		

			is actually that you the genuinely are supposed to have love and care for your parents. And the true
meaning of love and care will be when you're humbled to them. You cannot raise your voice at your
mother and then tell her I love you You know I love you right mom, but sometimes you're just so bad.
Like you know,
		

			you can start with I love you dad, but
		

			can't do that.
		

			The third meaning is the most powerful to me.
		

			You want Allah Allah, you better show them Rama. You better humble your wings, but a clip your wings
when you're dealing with your father and your mother.
		

			And Allah will sometimes test you by making your parents unusually agitating.
		

			He will make them say things that they will never say to anyone else, but they'll say them to you.
		

			And he will make them say things that are so utterly ridiculous that they will boil your blood and
you will want to say What are you talking about.
		

			And that will be the test from Allah on whether or not you've already earrings.
		

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