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Tazkiyya wa Tarbiyya #20

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Mirza Yawar Baig

Channel: Mirza Yawar Baig

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Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

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seller on the label hungry little bit Alameen wa salatu salam rhinoshield freedom be able more serene Muhammad Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam doesn't even Catherine cathedra from abajo, my brothers and sisters,

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in our

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class on the scatter knifes, one of the most important things is to put

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ourselves in perspective to think about what in English we call the ego,

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which is a sense of yourself.

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Now, the ego is a funny thing, because people say we should kill the ego, and so on and so forth. Right? But you cannot kill the ego, the simple reason that the ego is your self.

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The ego is your understanding of yourself.

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Who am I? What do I stand for, and the ego is comprised of the positive messages that I give myself.

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Now, it's a bit of a balance, because if you say that I will not give myself any positive message,

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then it is possible that you go into a

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in one of the forms of psychological psychological illness, and I don't want to go into I'm trying to avoid using jargon and technical terms. So just to just to give an A give it help us to understand.

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So if I genuinely start believing that if I or other little bit, let me put it another way, if I deny all the positive things that I know about myself,

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which may be my experience, my life experience, whatever, you know, good stuff, I have done, whatever good feedback I got from people and so on. So what supposing I want to deny all of this, then it can put me into a tailspin and take me to a very darkness,

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which is not something that one should, should have or should, should do. At the same time, if I focus

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on only the positive things, and I keep giving myself positive messages. And this is unfortunately, one of the

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things that happens in our modern society, especially with how we raise children,

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which is that we go to the superlative, almost from the word go.

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So a child, for example, does a project and we said this is absolutely fantastic. Okay, that's good to say that maybe the child feels nice, and you feel nice saying it, but then what's the next step after that? What is the next step above? Absolutely fantastic. Now, so it that that's another you know, negative spin really, because giving things more importance than that is the do creates a fantasy in the mind, which needs to be fed constantly. And this makes you a slave of the outside world.

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You consciously or unconsciously, then seek places and people who give you those positive messages, who give you those positive strokes, and thereby you enslave yourself to them and therefore, you become open to manipulation. Because anybody can do anything with you, as long as they are saying nice things to you, because you are like a, you know, you are like,

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like a hungry crocodile, that whatever stuff is put, the stomach never gets filled, constantly it has to be fed.

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So these are the two extremes. One is the next one is one extreme, which is the ego which has been bashed up so badly that

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it really has fallen into a pit.

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And that's the you know, depth of depression and despair and

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complete sense of annihilation of, of the person's self esteem. And on the other hand, self esteem which is taken to into the clouds, where it has no right to be. Now one very interesting book, which I keep on recommending all the time, and I've read it and I always owe that to my dear friend tire as well, from South Africa, who presented it to me one day, and we were going to Kruger National Park. And his uncle Ibrahim Patel was my he's my dearest friend, and you know, he and I die and we were all going and I give his book and he said, How are you? I'm sure you would like to read it. And when I started reading it, I just couldn't put it down. And I remember reading

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They're sitting in on a guest on the side of a gas pump in a gas station.

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Finishing

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on the way to Dragon's vlog and then to to the Kruger National Park. Now, the

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point I want to make is this book is called outliers and it's by Malcolm Gladwell.

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Now one of the things that are rather the the theme in that book, Malcolm Gladwell names a whole bunch of outliers, a whole bunch of exceptional people in the world. And some of the names are very familiar.

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Like Bill Gates, for example, and so others. Now he shows how and Malcolm Gladwell is a statistic for excellence, I mean, amazing guy. So he shows how

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it was a set of circumstances that were available to that individual.

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Now, of course, you know, in normal violence, you would call them fortunate circumstances, and so on, so forth. We know this is a lie data and not random data is the one who creates those circumstances. So another matter it created a set of circumstances, though they were not created for Bill Gates, meaning that times in which Bill Gates was born, and you know, he grew up and the access that he had thanks to the kind of family he grew up in, thanks to the kind of focus that his parents had on education and so on so forth, which got him to where it got him, whereas Malcolm Gladwell also gives examples of people who had just in terms of IQ as one measure, far higher IQ than Bill

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Gates's, but they didn't get to, you know, anywhere close to where he was. But interestingly, also, Malcolm Gladwell identifies in modern times the year in which circumstances were the most fortunate. And that is 1955. And that's the URL bar. Hi, Bill Gates talking about America. I don't know the same logic applies to India when I was born. But the point being is here

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is that in one line, Bill Gates negate I mean, not Bill Gates, Malcolm Gladwell, negates and completely disproves this

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ridiculous term in the English language, which is self made man,

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self made man, I've never heard the term self made woman, maybe women are too smart to sit to say that about themselves. So self made man, complete nonsense, because it is not somebody is effort alone, which produces results.

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As I say, it is true, that it is your effort, which led you to where you are. But remember, that some of that effort, if not a lot of it, was made standing on somebody else's shoulders.

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So be grateful, and be thankful to those people who gave you that leg up.

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Because if it hadn't been for them,

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you will not be anywhere close to where you are today. And at least in my life, I know this very, very well. And I'm extremely grateful. And to the extent that I've written books about those people I've written, I mentioned those people, not books about those people, but have in my, in the books that I've written, my memoirs are different parts of my life, I've mentioned those people with a lot of honor and a lot of thankfulness, because I know, I know exactly what kind of contribution those people made to my life. So the point I'm making here is that this issue of ego therefore, the ego is something that we create for ourselves. And as I told you, there is a positive element to that, we

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need it, we need to feel good about things we have done and so on and so forth, but keep the link of gratefulness and thankfulness

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alive and strong, because that is part of how you became what you begin.

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If you want to look at just the the harsh reality

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of

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human existence,

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it is that

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when a child is conceived,

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when the droplet of sperm is injected,

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then both the father and the mother may cause

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they have a bath.

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So our origin is a unclean drop.

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So as I said, I've said this, Allah subhanaw taala said this, and that is your your that's your origin, the origin who I am that unclean drop, and it was so unclean, that both parents had to make puzzles otherwise they did not have the heart.

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Then imagine that after I was born

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within a few

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If I died

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who would they say died

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of als martela protect everyone from this, but we know that many people, their children die in infancy.

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So the child is, you know, two days or three days old

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and died. Who do they say died, they say so and so's child died.

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There is no name, because the child has not been named yet.

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This is one such child died.

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And then

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remember, you lived a long life,

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great achievements,

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immense amount of knowledge,

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wrote books, taught books, whatnot, whatnot, whatnot. And then I die.

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After that, when you are dead.

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Now they are doing the making doing also for the body, for the hook for the body. They put cuffs on, on what? On the body?

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The bridge and as on what on the body.

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If they have to move the body,

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to the place where the general Salah is being prayed. What do they say?

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They say bring the body

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bring the janazah

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they don't say our way cola. They don't say bring our break is they bring the journalism

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what do they put in the way the body.

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So what is our reality? Our reality is somebody who when I was conceived,

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my parents talk about

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who when I was born, I had no name.

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Until I was named, I had no name if I died, I would have died as so and so's child. So and so's baby.

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And no matter what I achieved in life,

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when I die, I am called a body

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I lose not only the growth of my body, my Well, my whatever material I have, you will lose my name.

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And then the within quotes, funny situation is that if you lived

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a good life, and you were, I mean, if you did if you lived a bad life, and if you were some lousy piece of action, which people hated. And you would drop dead you dry. That obviously you will not be mentioned because nobody wants to talk about, you know, somebody who was a painful creature.

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But equally true. If you were a wonderful person, and everybody loved you,

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they still would not mention you,

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at least in before your near and dear ones, because they didn't want they don't want them to cause pain. They don't want they don't want that to cause pain to those people. They don't Don't mention him to his, to his wife to his husband, to her husband to their children because you know, they will cry so. So your name gets wiped off

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from the face of the earth.

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He distraught

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that if you did something then you know dubs of your actions and so on. Some of that remains on that. So we have students, are we talking about people, but I'm not saying average individual.

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Average individual names are forgotten.

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We had a very graphic

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experience of this.

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Where somebody asked for the

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grandmother's name, and you can try this as an experiment. You know, ask your family, ask people for the name of

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their grandmother or great grandmother that somebody was passed away maybe say what was your great grandmother's name? And say grandmother because the women's names are usually used less and they tend to disappear faster for no reason and they are the equal if not greater contributors to the offering but it goes.

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Same thing happens to the grandfathers but ask for the great grandmother's name.

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See how many people know each.

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Their grandmother is what? Two generations Right?

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Great Grandmother, grandmother, and your

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grandfather, grandfather, your father.

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So two generations up from you. They was gone.

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Nobody knows what that was.

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Let's look at another aspect. This whole pride that we have I'm sorry

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I'm an expert, I'm a physician, I'm a doctor, I'm Chancellor of university, I will, you know, President of the country, whatever you are, I'm going to have this Koran and this movie and this, this great religious scholar, right?

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One little IMBEL, I'm not talking about having had injuries and accidents, I'm saying one little imbalance in potassium in your blood.

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And you start talking gibberish.

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All your knowledge vanishes, disappears.

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Just a little imbalance. And that imbalance can happen for a multiple number of reasons.

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You start talking gibberish, all your knowledge is gone.

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I've seen it actually, it's a tragic thing to see, but I've seen it, May Allah help us to learn lessons from what we see.

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So my point is, the thing to remind ourselves is

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that whatever I became,

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I became not because I made myself I became because of the Mercy of Allah subhanho data, who caused a certain set of favorable circumstances in my life,

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who faced me with certain challenges, and then extracted me from those challenges in safety so that I learned something and I didn't Perish the challenges.

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Who gave me mentors who gave me people who

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donated within quotes, their life and their knowledge

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to buy development,

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who invested all that in my life, for no return to them?

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Who gave me the energy, the ability, the focus?

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To do whatever I did, and when I say I am not talking about myself, I'm saying you say this to yourself.

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Say this to yourself, don't look at somebody else's eye, what will you be talking about the ego.

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So, whatever I did and so on, so, because of that energy because of that focus, because of that go to goal orientation.

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And then who cause because of this, Allah subhanaw taala caused whatever name and fame that I didn't I may have in the world

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and then Allah subhanaw taala gave me that

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the mind and the strength and the whatever to contribute and to produce whatever I produced.

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So where do I come into this?

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And the product of what Allah subhanaw taala decided to create

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he gave me the that

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he gave me

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the resources

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he gave me the knowledge he gave me the mentors he gave me the people to to mold me

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and that's why last router asked this question Halla data in sunny in know Mina, daddy lumea calm Surya muslins

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unless it has been forgotten

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that there was a time when he was not even mentioned.

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That's true for every single one of us.

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There is no parent in the world who actually prayed for you individually specifically to say I want a child like this. Nobody does it.

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So there was a time when you were not mentioned and I and as I mentioned, even after you were born,

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for a period you are not mentioned, you don't have an identity to die you are somebody said you have no identity of your own.

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And as soon as you die, your identity again is wiped out vanished.

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You may have been the king of the world but once you once you die, you are a body.

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Your identity is gone. halus

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and that's the reason why whatever is around

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the eyes of Ron Brown Salam says

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He created me. He feeds when I'm hungry. He feeds me

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when I become sick, your BMI was a burrito for jolla screen

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for you to me

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Have you seen he is the one who feeds me and gives me to drink.

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So the MLA and the MBR Lima salaam, the teachers were to ascribe

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this thankfulness to

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the problem with the ego is that this ego

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as I told you the two extremes, if you deny it completely, you fall into

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in a bad place, but if you feed it,

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then it takes you to a worse place, which is the level of arrogance

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then it is me and mine and so on and so on and so forth. I have this on so, I have two sons.

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If you are if you talk to somebody or ask them, Who are you

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usually,

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people will define themselves in as the job as the role that they are playing at that time.

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So who are you? I am the president of this country.

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Who are you? I am the director of this institute.

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You get the right.

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Is that true?

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If I take the term director of the Institute,

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who was the right or the stood before you, there was somebody

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who will be after you somebody else.

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So who is the director of the institute? whoever happens to be in that place?

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Are you the narrative is to know I am only fulfilling the role of director of Institute isn't who I am.

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It's not who I am.

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Who am I? Have you ever been myself?

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And what is the

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definition of ARB?

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As I mentioned,

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somebody whose parents had about somebody who had no name, and somebody who will have no name.

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This is wonderful teaching story of

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a fakir

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who somehow found his way into the great Durbar hall of the Emperor. And he put his,

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his bedding there, and he later went off to sleep. The gods discovered him and they woke him up and they arrested him.

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They were addicted. He said, they took him to the king.

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So the emperor said to him, What were you doing the double

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the ones that I was leaving in the hotel.

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Sir, I said, this is a site.

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This is a warehouse. Travelers were trying to stop. He said I was living there. What is my crime? Why Why am I being arrested and arrest and so on?

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The King said you're crazy.

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This is my palace.

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So the funnier asked him who lived here before you?

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The King said my father.

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And he said before him, he said my grandfather

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before him my great grandfather

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and who will live here after he said my sons and who will live after after your son he says my son Son My grandson.

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So the forehead said to him displays there was somebody here before you somebody before him somebody after somebody after people are coming and going this is a site What do you use your palace?

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So am I mad? Are you mad?

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Ready to Live and myself constantly about this.

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This little span of life we have

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Allah has given us the control.

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We can choose to live it any way we like, anyway.

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Like you can have a deal. There's no compulsion in religion.

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We are not forced to be successful. We are not forced to be failures.

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We are not forced to go to Jannah we are not forced to go to Jannah.

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Everything is in our control.

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What we do have is a timespan the duration of which we don't know.

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It can end at any time.

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What we do know is that it will end

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it is not something that continues

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so what do we want to do with it?

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The reason I

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Talking about this in the middle of the of the series, when we have mentioned that obedience as one element and we are going to talk about Ichiba in the next class as the other element

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is because it means to

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imitate, it means to emulate, it means to follow closely

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dot four dot dash dash

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somebody

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and who is that somebody now context that somebody in our context is Muhammad Sallallahu ala ULH

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Muhammad Rasulullah sallallahu?

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And why must we do that, because when I have a short period of time

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the most efficient thing to do

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is to follow somebody who's already been down that path and we know that was successful.

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If I want to reinvent the wheel, I can do that.

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But the chances of me being right are non existent because the one who I'm being asked to follow is the one who was guided

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by the one who will judge what is success and what is failure

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for man Zuzia and scenario to kill agenda pocket fans last month that I mentioned very clearly isn't the one who is freed from the hellfire and entered into Jannah only that person is successful.

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woman had to dunya Illa Matau grown under that and the life of this world is only deception.

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And it's actually explained to you

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how much how much more graphically can I express the fact that somebody who considers him seven not just when I say considers himself I'm not saying the man was whoever it was it like no.

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An individual who is learned is considers himself to be learned and people consider him to learn it because he's learned he's not telling lies is not a figment of his imagination.

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But what is the

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quality and importance of that learning when that learning can vanish and disappear just by the

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by an imbalance in the potassium levels in the blood.

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So it's okay to build on it, which okay to spend time in that to acquire knowledge and so on so forth.

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But it's very critical to maintain perspective and say, I this knowledge I got because of the will of Allah subhanaw taala because Allah permitted me to get this knowledge and I retain this knowledge and by the will of Allah Samantha.

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If Allah Subhana Allah wants to take this knowledge away, it will, it's a matter of

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you know, a second lesson the second one has to do that.

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Keeping this perspective of who I am,

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and what I am

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is extremely important.

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Because we want to

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we want to make sure

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that

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the thing which we get at the end of our lives, which is

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success or failure before Allah,

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there we are pronounced to be successful people.

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And who will be successful as I mentioned, do Allah, Allah subhanaw taala mentioned this to us?

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Romans ziani Nadie WHAT THE HELL agenda palletizers the one who has been freed from the Empire and entered into Jannah only this person is successful

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and the sure fire way the absolutely certain

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path that leads to that success is the path that was all nice and nice.

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Sirata Mr. P.

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This is what we ask Allah subhanaw taala VAR in every Salah as part of the Fatiha is in a circumstance or like grant me.

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guidance to the path of steadfastness.

00:29:51--> 00:29:56

Guide me to the path of steadfastness Siddhartha Levina and an entirely

00:29:58--> 00:29:59

vegan multilingual body

00:30:00--> 00:30:06

The final doors will bless. Not those who are misguided or who incurred your anger.

00:30:08--> 00:30:14

Who are the those who are best? Yeah, I seen a Quran in Kiev in a kilometer who said in Allah circumstan

00:30:15--> 00:30:23

and not return address of Soros and seller said oh yeah See, one of the horrible Nakata and also one of the names of Allah.

00:30:25--> 00:30:32

Allah to get caught by the Quran Parana Hakim, by the Quran, which is full of Hikmah, Full of Wisdom.

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In Nikola minimill, serene, truly uncertainly, you are one of the messengers, Allah zoonotic, Mr. Payne and you are on the path of steadfastness.

00:30:46--> 00:30:52

When we ask Allah within a certain western theme, we are asking for guidance to the Sunnah of us realize and listen

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I want to do one message with you. It is reflect on this.

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Before we go to the next part of our series on a diva versus a setup, let us reflect on the importance of following this because this is our guidance to John Nigel

00:31:19--> 00:31:22

or some of the Alana will carry while he was I believe maybe erotica.