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Muhammad 40 – Marriage To Khadijah

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Jamal Badawi

Channel: Jamal Badawi

Series:

Episode Notes

Episode Transcript

© No part of this transcript may be copied or referenced or transmitted in any way whatsoever. Transcripts are auto-generated and thus will be be inaccurate. We are working on a system to allow volunteers to edit transcripts in a controlled system.


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Aleikum, peace beyond you. Welcome to another episode of Islam and focus. I'm your host comet Rashid. Today we have our 40th program in our series dealing with Mohammed, the last messenger of Allah. Today we're going to have a discussion of the prophets marriage to Khadija. I have joining me on the program as usual. As my guest, Dr. Jamal Baddeley of St. Mary's University brother, Jamal assalamu. aleikum wa Alaykum cinema. Before we get into this

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topic, could I have to perhaps just take a few minutes to highlight the main points we touched on last week in our program? Sure. Last week's program was a continuation of the examination of the life of Muhammad peace be upon him as a youth. And we discussed the lesson that one can learn from his abstinence, voluntary abstinence from indulgence and what the young people in his age did, drinking and all that.

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And we said that this lessons refer essentially to two basic things one, to the fact that God protected him

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in preparation for his role as a messenger, so that he would be without blemish.

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Secondly, we discussed in some detail also, how could that apply to the upbringing of youth in general and Muslim youth particularly in non Islamic societies, and the role of teachers, parents and others, in communicating effectively with them to encourage them to live as Muslims by giving good example and by being patient and communicating with them.

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And then we discussed some of the events, some other events also in the life of the Prophet as a young man.

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First was the SEC religious wars, and his help to his Jenkins collecting the errors, as he was probably about 14 or 15. That that time and how this war ended, fortunately, and also discuss briefly the helpful for those are a pact of Cheverly, who and the reasons leading to that particular pact. And we implied from that, that Muslims, if they follow the instruction of the Prophet God should be willing to cooperate in something that's not contradictory to their faith in even in a pluralistic society, so long as it helps to establish justice and remove oppression, just like the pact did. At the time of the Prophet peace. We

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like to turn your attention now to some discussion of the prophets. Marriage, I would like to ask you,

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prior to his married share to Khadija did the Prophet peace of blessings be upon him, did he try to find a suitable match for marriage? Yes, some references like for example.

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Say that there is a report that the Prophet at one time prophet Mohamad, this weapon, he went to his uncle, a botanical garden, actually, when he was young, and he asked for the hand of his daughter, who later on came to be known with the famous name of Mohammed, the mother of Hannah. She was not of course married at that time.

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Now, I will tell you, I seem to have politely give subtle answers, you know, or apologized in a very subtle and polite way.

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He said, basically, that he feels that he is obliged to reciprocate with another tribe called Muslim intermarriage, because if you give someone a message from that tribe, then they expect you to reciprocate.

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It is not known whether, you know, avatar actually had that in mind, or he might have felt that Prophet Muhammad at that time was not in a position financially, you know, to carry responsibility of a family this is not quite clear, but at least his words were very polite, because he loved his, you know, cousin very much, and he knew, sorry, his nephew, very much.

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However, it seems that it wasn't really too long after that, that the Prophet peace be upon him received a proposal for marriage from his first wife Khadija, with whom unknown he lived for the next quarter of a century. But before we turn to some discussion of the circumstances of that proposal, I'd like to ask you if you could give us some idea about Khadija his background and how did she How does she know about Mohammed properly supposed to be about what to begin with? hadiza belong to the tribe or clan known as acid.

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And these people actually were related also to the cleanse of Hashem from which the Prophet came. Yes. So in that says, there was at least some sort of relation, you know, within this broader Karachi tribe.

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Khadija actually was married twice before that.

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Apparently her husband's died. She was quite rich. She married to one and then probably died. We're not sure about the first one whether it was death or or divorce. Yes, probably death. The second one husband

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That's this information on that hadisha was quite rich, she was engaged in trade, and after the death of her second husband,

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have customers to hire people to take care of her trade on her behalf, to travel on caravans buy and sell on her behalf, in return, of course, for some sort of fee that she pays them.

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And one day, Abu Talib, the uncle of the Prophet, who was at that time, facing some financial difficulty, he came to Prophet Muhammad and he said,

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Now, it is about the time when the caravans go to Syria.

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And Khadija usually hire people to, to do that, to look after her trade. Why did you go

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and offer her, you know, to work for her? And, of course, she knows about your truthfulness and honesty and so on.

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But the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon responded, he says, alright, maybe she would send

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an ask for me. Sometimes you wonder, why did they give that answer?

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In the first volume of his book about the history of the Prophet explained this reluctance on the prophet in terms of dignity of his person.

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And he says that the reputation and honesty of the Prophet

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definitely was a great asset, that he did not wish to make this smaller quality and article of trades. In other words, even though he's known he didn't want to initiate that. And somehow we felt much more comfortable if people approach him because of that honesty and asked him to do that work. So maybe that's it's not that his latest work, he's always been hard working, and he started as young, even doing some work from which you can earn some living.

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It is quite possible also that the Prophet, peace be upon him was certain in his own heart, that javita

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definitely must have heard about him and about his characteristics and characters, you might say, an honesty.

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But again, it was that dignity that he said, All right, you know, if she wants to trust me, let her in she, you know, that contact? And actually, that's what happened. Yes. Obviously, it had to be some contact on her back. Right? Can you tell us now perhaps how Khadija did approach him and off the job. When she sent she sent to him. And asked if you're ready and prepared to, you know, look after my trade or my caravan

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to sell my goods in Syria, usually these used to take the goods, they sell it and then with the price, they buy some other items too, just like import and export simultaneous.

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Because of her trust in him and his characters she even offered she said I'm willing to pay you double the highest fees that I paid to any man before.

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In fact, she was quite wise in this because

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we would see that it was really a good deal for her even commercially speaking to have an honest person like him looking after her.

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To help him also and encouraging him she said I'm going to send with you also one of my servants His name is my Sarah, to help you and serve you on the way also, as it happened. That young boy my Sarah was a witness of certain unusual events. And in that particular

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What happened? You have I'm sure all of the viewers must be curious, you say unusual events. Could you tell us what happened on that particular trip? What to begin with? We must remember that, in traveling, the real character of the individual shows Yes, when people are tired, the attitude of unselfishness, courage, inability, or the lack of it appears more in long travels than it appears when people just give a face and in short type of encounters.

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And surely this was one of the first thing that struck my sorrow. The inability, the characters of the Prophet was something that he never saw in any other man that he made before.

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But there was something more than that even throughout the trip. My Sarah noted something unusual. He said that even in the the intense heat during the day, they did not feel that heat as much. He felt as if something is like shading them on the way. There was a report in that one time he looked and he saw what might appear to him like two engines, shadowing, or shedding the profit to protect them from the profit and myself of course to protect them from from the

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heat of the sun. But perhaps the most amazing thing that happened is that it is reported that when the caravan passed by the city of Basra By the way, this is the same apparently hold was placed where the caravan stopped. And you might recall from the previous program, this was the place also where when Mohammed was young, maybe 1213 years before he stopped with his uncle, and that's where a Christian monk

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saw him and recognized him to be the anticipated prophet. So apparently, it was the same place but it was a different monk by the name of Mr. And esgr.

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Like Shahbaz Asad, just in the first volume of his book, he says, either, that the previous monk behera, who saw the Prophet first might have died, and this man is living in this place, or you might have changed his cell, the place of worship. But whichever the case

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the Prophet said, they're under a tree, possibly the same tree that he said before, under which he said before, and then the, this monk, the Christian monk, Mr.

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might have felt something unusual, probably that there is a great spiritual presence. Some reports say that the three when the Prophet said no word it's, you know, branches somehow, as if they are providing shade for him.

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So he felt something unusual anyway. And the evidence of that is that he asked my son, I said, mice, you know, come by boy, tell me, Who's that man sitting under the tree? So my answer, he said, he is one of the people who have the guardianship of the sanctuary, referring to the Kaaba, the people of the, of the Kaaba.

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So the, the monk, the Christian monk said to him, none other than a prophet is sitting beneath that tree.

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Now, how do you understand that statement? Some people might have mistakenly understood that to mean that this is a special tree under which all profits sit, which is not very likely, as some scholars suggest, because no tree can live for centuries like that. But I think I like this translation, none other than a prophet is sitting beneath that tree.

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That means he recognized that this must be a profit, not that this is

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the profit sheet. And another report, actually, it is said that this month

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after he met with the prophet and talked to him, he recognized him from his science from his appearance as the one anticipated profit. And it says that he kissed his head and his feet, and he said, I believe in you. And I bear witness that you are the one who has been mentioned by God in the Torah.

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And then when he saw the stamp of prophethood, which is a sort of like a birthmark in the left, upper back of the Prophet, it says when he said that also, he kissed him and he said, I bear witness that you are the unlettered Prophet, who was

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prophesied by Jesus peace be upon him.

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In any case, it seems that this statement might appeal even to some Muslims as to explicit that it might raise some question even as to whether this is really happened or not. But in view of the extensive discussion that we had before in the early part of that series about the evidence about the coming of Prophet Mohammed, both in the Old and New Testament in terms of canonized gospel and other apocryphal literature, in the tradition that existed among the Arabs at that time, they have been so many consistent signs that I believe that that report is not really out of line, it seems to be fitting in that total picture. But in any case,

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this was some of the unusual

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events

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that took place that really struck me Sara

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Lee, what were the results of the trip was a successful trip.

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I mean, commercial or otherwise, commercially or otherwise. Okay, commercially speaking, it was very successful. Yes. In fact, because of the profits contentiousness and honesty, he was able to sell her articles for twice as much as it costed her and then he used the money, transacted others activities and bought other items for that price. So commercially speaking, I think it was pretty good. So had he got more than his, you know, what you expected from that? That trip, but I think perhaps, a more important outcome, the otherwise

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of that trip, is that by Sara when he came back, he told padishah of what he saw

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About the character of the Prophet, how much he was very impressed, indicated that he definitely was in the presence of great spiritual presence during that travel. He told her how the Christian monk identified the Prophet as the awaited prophet.

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Subsequently, Khadija went to her cousin, his name was what a novel

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what a car actually was an old man, who in the later years of his life, became Christian. He rejected the idea of worship, he became a Christian. And he was studying as much as he could have the NGO or the level at what we call today, perhaps the Gospels, and even tried to translate some portion into the Arabic language.

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So Khadija made a proper choice theory that this is someone who knows about prophets about religion, so maybe I should ask him

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watarrka Khadija, that if what my Sarah is describing actually happened, if this is true, this is for sure, the profit for this nation is amazing, this nation is universal profit that means you will emerge in this nation. And he told her that I knew that there is a profit yet to come, and that his time has thrown me

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this information in fact, made Khadija

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change her attitude that she had before concerning possible marriage. Third, managing her case, and to begin to seriously, you know, think of offering to my Prophet Mohammed.

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Could you explain what you mean when when you say that Khadija changed her attitudes towards towards marriage was to begin with Hades at that time was about 40 years of age? Yes, number one. Number two, she had already married twice before, in the second husband, for example, died.

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And because she was quite rich, she probably at that age, she felt that she can survive quite decently without necessarily Merrick. Yes. But even when people offered harsh marriage, she received a lot of proposals, yes, from lots of people, but she rejected them. Or maybe somehow she might have felt that people who offered her marriage were more interested in her wealth, yes, rather than hash character, even though she was still beautiful, and, you know, acceptable. But she was suspicious that probably she didn't feel it was really not her was that that was attracting them.

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And of course, in that age, and with that reputation and honor of a woman like that, and by the way, his reputation was very good. She was known as an athlete for the chest, she was known as wise also.

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Her criteria in evaluating men, of course, in that stage of her life, focused a lot more about moral integrity and character, probably she didn't feel satisfied with any of those proposals that she received. But having heard about the Prophet heard also from her servant, my Sarah, she found those characteristics and more embodied quite clearly, in Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him, which led her really to think of offering herself in marriage time. Well, this

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will be of interest, particularly to the ladies in our audience. How did Khadija go about expressing her wish to marry Muhammad peace be upon him when she was Frank and dignified at the same time? She had a lady friend of hers by the name of Pfizer.

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And she discussed that matter with her, showing her face after the hash, all right, you know, Leave that to me. And then you face her, went to talk to Prophet Muhammad. He was 25 years of age at that time. And the conversation went like this. And Pfizer.

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Why didn't you get married? Mohammed?

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The Prophet answer? Well, I don't have the means to marry means financial means. I don't have the means to marry, professor. When Mohammed if you were offered beauty, property, inability and abundance, would you not consent?

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Or you could refuse? Exactly. You said, who she she said Khadija.

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Deja, how could such a marriage be mine?

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nafeesa answer. Leave that to me.

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Okay. He said, One, from my part, I'm willing.

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And that's such an ifisa took that good news. And went back to hadiza, who sent in her word to Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him to come to discuss the message. So that's how the introduction took place. It's a very interesting, it is very dignified. It isn't. What How did the Israeli record a record as to how the conversation went when he met

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Khadija, yes? Yes. Actually they say that Khadija was both forthright and dignified and she said to him, quote, all son of my uncle, this was a term used, like respect and relationship doesn't have to be literally immediate. And also one of my uncle, I like you, for your kinship with me, because you mentioned before they come from the center, right? Yes. And for your impartiality, not being partisan, partisan among the people for this or that.

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And I like you for your trustworthiness, and for the beauty or goodness of your characters, and the truth of your word. And then she offered, you know, him to manage to her.

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He agreed, and they both agreed that they should go each one of them and talk to his uncle,

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his or her uncle. That was the custom of the herbs. Yes.

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So the two anchors met

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the uncle of Khadija, his name is Ahmed Asad, because it is said that her father actually died a few years back in one of those wars, how to build fudge.

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on the part of Prophet Muhammad, we find two reports one mentioned his uncle Abu Talib, the other mentioned Hamza, it's quite possible that both uncle's actually went because Hamza actually was one of the younger anchors of the prophets. But he had some marital or relationship by way of marriage with the clan of acid, the clan of Khadija. So maybe they thought you would be more adequate, it's quite possible that actually both of them went to discuss the matter.

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And they, after discussion, I don't want to get to the detail that went between the two until they discussed the method and they finally agreed that this is the proper thing to do. And the Prophet offered for Khadija as a marital gift. As you know, a Muslim must give a marital gift to his wife, whatever, his abilities, and he gave her 20 chickens in the day of man, which is pretty good, you know, Kevin's was quite surprised. In the very day of marriage, Khadija also gave one of his servants by the name of Zaid to Prophet Muhammad, you know, to help him who was a band, band man, on his part also, Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him, expressed his joy in the occasion, by sitting

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free, the faithful servant of his mother, amen. Her name at that time was Baraka and he met it later. And of course, that's how she acquired the name of my mentor name was Baraka chosen Ethiopian. lady was very faithful servant. And as we remember from previous series, when prophets Mohammed

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mother's died on the way she brought him and she was very compassionate, and you consider her almost like, you know, a mother to him. So, he took that occasion to express his gratitude by setting has three she was not on guard, event woman, subsequently.

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Baraka got married to a man from yesterday.

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And B got his son from him by the name of a man and that's why she's called also on the Haman. Yes. In any case, this was perhaps a very major event in the life of the Prophet. But they could have not been any better choice really, even though Khadija was 16 years senior to the profit, she was 40 years and he was on the 25 years of age.

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Well, we have a few moments left in today's program.

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I'm sure there are probably some among our viewers who might be curious to know a bit about the

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physical appearance of the of the Prophet, I want to ask you, is there any information available on this, that you might be able to share at this point, indeed, in fact, to my humble understanding, he's perhaps the only prophet who you know came

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where we have detailed description from more than one source about his physical appearance. Of course, maybe the time frame in which he came might have helped maintain those records. But at least we have plenty actually under and let me summarize it may be beginning with the general statues of the Prophet and it is said to have been of he has been of medium stature, but a little bit inclined to being tall, not quite that medium, more or less. He was also in his buildup, average, but tending a little bit towards the side of slimness, not too slim but is a little bit.

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His complexion was somewhat white, not it's not very bright, white, somewhat right and somewhat paint his appearance from the sand possibly.

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The face was large and round.

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He had broad

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shoulders and chest, also

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But otherwise the body was perfectly proportioned.

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Starting from the, the head up down

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his hair and beard both were quite thick and black.

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And he parted his hairs in the middle. His hair was neither too straight not to Kelly was somewhat, you know, soft but somewhat cold also.

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And his head reached

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just about midway between the lobes of his ears and shoulders.

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Some somewhere around here.

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The most notable thing about his face was that he had a novel in bed abroad, forehead.

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The ovens of his large eyes were quite wide.

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He had exceptionally long eyelashes,

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his brows, eyebrows were quite extensive, slightly arched, but not giant, not really giant.

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His eyes His eyes were black, even though there's some report later report not the very other one that say it was brown, with some slight redness in the white part of the eye, just a little redness. His nose was aquiline

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he had a wide and finely shaped mouth,

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with spaces between the teeth and by the way, the herbs used to consider that sign of good view and it's just a slight spaces between the teeth.

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He had a way he had also a mustache that he never let to protrude over his upper lip. So he tried to shorten

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the length of his beard, more or less matched the length of his hair.

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And also on his back, as I mentioned in the previous program, there was something that's known as hot amenable where the stamp of profit to it that was actually believed to have been assigned known to some religious people before him as a sign that this is the anticipated profit. And it looked almost like shape of an egg. Just make a birthmark a little reddish. In the upper part of his left shoulder. Some say that they had a few hairs and then but this apparently was quite recognizable by several people, including Sandman, depression, and we've talked about that later. So that it was known and noted by many people. So it seems that there might have been some manuscript that give you

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has given this definite same physical even that this is the anticipated prophet.

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His hands and feets were rather full and not very slim. And generally speaking, he combined natural beauty with a nice voice

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with visible comeliness in his character, remarkably luminous eyes

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with light felt in his face, which was especially apparent in his forehead, as I said before, but I'm not familiar with in profit where you have the details such detailed information available, but of course, he came close enough to ask competitively started profits then.

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Right? Well, unfortunately have to conclude our program. on that particular note. We want to thank you all for watching the program today. We want to invite you back next week we'll continue with our series dealing with Mohammed the last messenger of Islam has normally come peace