Calisha Bennett – Reflections on the Decision to be a ‘COVERED GIRL’

			Beautiful to be here and to be able to share some thoughts and reflections about hijab. And
personally in my journey, hijab has been a definitely a challenge. I haven't always liked it. Some
parts were really hard, but have the love foot for where I am now in my life, it's a part of who I
am. And I always ask Allah, Allah to make me always love my hijab, and always keep an eye on and
stand proud with my hijab. So today, inshallah I'm going to share with you.
		

			Three, I want you to remember three points. Okay, so the first point that I'm going to talk to you
about your decisions, what is it, your decisions, number two, your nafs. And number three, your
reward. So what are these, your decisions, your knowledge, and your reward. So my story and want to
share today, we're going to go through these three points, your decisions, and the decisions that
you make that you have to live by, that you're going to be accountable for with our loved ones,
Allah, we're going to talk about your nuts. And that just means like desires, you know what you
want, like, there's what Alo ones, and then there's what you want. And you're NASA with the things
		

			that you sometimes want that you have to kind of struggle with. And then your reward for keeping
your focus on the reward. So when it comes to your decisions for me, in my journey, my parents
weren't very religious and didn't have much knowledge. And when I was about 12 years old, I started
going to classes and learning and practicing more. And my mom especially became pretty strict,
really fast, right? And before that had a lot of freedoms, and then right at 12, right in the age
where you're kind of like, Hey, we're gonna get cracking going to, you know, enter teenagehood and
have a bit of fun and this and that, and mom's like, so we're gonna have the talk, you're going to
		

			wear the hijab. In my head, I'm like, Alright, I want it yet. I haven't reached puberty yet. Right?
She said, you're gonna wear it. And my mom, my mom is Asian background, don't mess with Asian moms.
		

			And she was just like, you're wearing it. And so I was like, hey, wear it, right, I didn't feel so
good about it felt really scared. I put it on and started wearing it regularly, in practice for when
I would reach the age of puberty, and my friends will come like, oh, you're wearing like hijab now
full on. And so I went through those struggles, and I was at Muslim school at the time. And then my
family moved away. And I went to a public school, where I was the only Muslim in the whole school.
So I was like, so scared. It was out in the country in Western Australia. So I was so scared. I'm on
the first day. Oh, my gosh, I was like, literally like an alien, because I don't think they'd seen
		

			Muslims before. So it was recess time. And we were walking outside and having a look around the
school. And the principal told two girls, can you take colletion and take it and have a look around
the school and tell her where everything is. So these girls are like, showing me around this is that
places that place? And I could hear like all these voices behind us. And I turned around and I think
there was like 10 2030 people in a group. All the students from the school just following like, What
is she? What is she wearing? And how many times that first week that I got asked, What's that on the
head? Why are you wearing it? Why do you have to wear it? Where are you from? Like, I just had to
		

			keep answering answering. And then Hamza de la, they got over it pretty quick. But that was that was
really hard. But I remember like, telling myself, This is hard. And this is going to be hard. But
you have to choose it. And my reason behind choosing it because I knew in my heart that it was
right. Like it was the right thing to do. Why not for my mom, even though, you know, in a way at
that time, I was doing it for my mom, but in my heart I knew that this is what Allah Allah would
want from me as a young woman. So the next journey, you know, you're not. Okay, so that was your
decisions, you're going to have to make decisions between you and Allah at certain parts of your
		

			life at certain milestones. And you got to be brave enough to make those decisions. They won't
always be easy. So the second part of my story, your naps. So now I'm in a non Muslim environment. I
was out of public school. Of course, I want to fit in, you know, of course, I want to be like
everyone else. And it was really hard to be the one different person literally in the entire school.
My brother did go to the school, but I had his classmates he's older than me. His classmates said,
Your brother is he Oh, brother. I was like, yeah, we have the same surname. We came on the same day
that he told us that you're his adopted sister. So I was just like, Oh my gosh, thanks, Bert. Right
		

			That's a big brother's a good force on Allah. But again, you know, it's hard feeling so alone in
that environment. So wanting to fit in, wanting to be cool wanting to be you know, hang with, you
know, the cool people and stuff like that. That was hard. Because within you there is this like
desire you want to look
		

			Pretty all you want to look the same. And I remember I did you know, there are a couple of boys that
I liked at school too. And then I was like, if I didn't have this son, would they like me? Like,
would they like me more. So I had those questions. And I had days where I was like feeling weak and
just, you know, kind of like doubting myself and hamdulillah. In that few years, I never took it
off. And I never regretted taking it off, I always look back and I feel hamdullah like proud of
myself that I kept it on. So later on, we moved into back to the city, and back to the Muslim
community. And at that time, the people that I was close to there was like cousins and close family
		

			friends that I used to hang out with that I was like, Okay, I'm back, let's hang out, they all
decided to take their scarves off. And they started doing fun stuff, right? Going out a lot dressing
up makeup, they started experimenting, going to parties and hanging out guys and you know, smoking
and things like that. And now again, I'm going to decision I've got a hijab on. And these are my
These are my people like them, my best friends my cousin's like I want to fit in. And again, like,
you know, those that come to this place with us come and do that with us. And I'm like, how am I
going to do that with hijab. And a lot of the time hamdulillah my hijab is what made me say, Now I'm
		

			not going to go because it's going to look so weird if I go there with them, do that with them, and
I'm wearing my hijab. So it became like a protector for me from falling into sins, from falling into
bad company and being in bad places. And if I tell you now, you know, this is like, nearly 20 years
later, those friends who went down that path and chose their knifes, they chose fun, they chose
pretty as their priority, they chose adventure and partying and all of that they chose cool over
their spirituality. Now, like with the way their lives have turned out, like it breaks my heart
still, and I still love them. And I hope allotments Allah brings them back. But their lives are, you
		

			could say in ways like very damaged and ruin. And that's not to judge them. They made their choices,
but our choices have consequences. Okay, so you're always going to be faced with decisions and Allah
gives commandments about what you should do, and why you should do it and how you should do it.
Because ultimately, it does protect you, if you would just trust him. But that's the heartbeat Do
you trust a lot enough? Do you trust his rules? Do you trust his message of Islam? Do you trust it
enough to say I'm going to submit because that's what being a Muslim means one who submits, I'm
going to submit my enough. I'm gonna submit what I want what allow once and I trust that the outcome
		

			of doing what Allah wants will always be a good outcome in this life, and inshallah in the next
life. So the third point about your reward, you're doing it ultimately, full reward from Allah
subhanaw taala. And like I just mentioned, you won't regret it, your life will have things that you
know, as your life progresses, you'll look back at all those decisions at the knifes that you
battled. And you say, 100 are like, I feel good. The reward is feeling good in this life. And we
know in the next life, every sacrifice you made every time you wanted to do something which you
know, Allah wasn't the most pleased with, but you're like, Nah, like, I'm just gonna wait something
		

			looser today. Just that little sacrifice, even if it's not yet your job. You just said I'm gonna
waste something lucid today, I was counting that, and he's gonna reward you for it. And where does
your reward Where is your reward?
		

			Where's the reward and after the next slide in paradise for how long for a moment,
		

			forever, what is forever, it's eternity forever and ever and ever and ever is your reward. If just
today you make one sacrifice, if just this moment you make the right choice, over the wrong choice.
And that's what you will meet inshallah, in the next slide. And a really kind of big part that made
me realize, like I have to stay on this track was when I was about 15 years old, I got a phone call.
My mom said, Oh, it's your old friend, like she wants to talk to you. And this friend. Now I didn't
hang around with her a lot. But we were she was about a year or two older than me.
		

			We didn't hang out much because she was really in the party scene. And she called me up when she was
about 17 and a half then. And then her voice is quiet and other side of the phone. She's like
collegia I'm like, like, I'm sorry, only the audit. I do like why she called me like what happened?
And then she says I just I just I know that you didn't come with us and join with us when we went
down this path, but and you chose to wear the scarf and we all didn't. What made you choose it?
		

			And so I was like, Whoa, why did I choose it? That was the first time I've actually been asked Why
did I choose it? And I tried to explain to her why I chose it and where it came from and the reasons
behind why I chose to wear the hijab and I said to her, why are you Why are you asking me like
where's this?
		

			Coming from like, I thought maybe she was like turning your life around. And she said, I've been
diagnosed with a brain tumor 17 and a half years old. And she's like, I just feel like, I need to
get serious about life. And she was really scared. And she was crying on the phone. And I was just
like, shocked. I thought I was younger than her. I was like, why are you asking me for advice? Like,
I'm trying to just keep this thing on, you know, I was battling. But that moment reminded me of how
important it is to be someone who stands for something. No, there's a saying, If you stand for
nothing, you'll fall for anything. Yeah, so if you stand for something, not only will you be able to
		

			prevent falling into traps and bad places, but other people whether you realize it or not like the
sisters saying they will look at you like a role model. They will feel stronger and more empowered
to want to be a really dignified woman because of what they see you do and the way that they see you
live. So the sad thing for my dear friend, my live message, she did pass away. By 19 years old, she
passed away and she lost her battle with cancer. But hamdulillah she did put the scarf on in that
time. And she came back to a lunch she prayed and she made so I tried to fix her life up. Because
why when it comes down to it, what does pretty matter? What does cool matter? What does popular,
		

			famous rich matter. If you don't know if you're even going to be here tomorrow, that the Day of
Judgment, your accountability is coming. That's the reality for all of us. And we have to choose and
make those decisions about whether we want a lot more dollars reward and happiness and paradise in
the hereafter. So you know, there's a beautiful saying that says, Why try so hard to fit in when you
were born to stand out. And when you wear hijab, you absolutely can't stand out. And the statistics
are showing that Muslim women we caught the most hatred and abuse in racist remarks than anyone. So
when you wear hijab and you stand on your wrist, now you are a warrior out in the street, Bankstown
		

			wall or in the city or on the train, you're a warrior, you're standing for Islam, you're
representing our entire community anti oma, even though the world wants to lie about our religion,
even though the world wants to slam women and make them be naked and open and improper and
undignified and overly sexualized. You are saying not my body is mine and this body belongs to Allah
subhanaw taala no one's gonna touch it or see it or even you know, take advantage of it in any way.
So my lessons are like keep you all strong and keep us all strong together and support everyone and
anyone that you can with Hey, Jasmine, if you're struggling, reach out to some amazing people here.
		

			You want support or you know, mentors to like help you take slowly step by steps, figure out the
wardrobe plan and all that reach out and get the help inshallah and believe in your beautiful cells
and use up the left side for listening to me so my story and holding space when I should