The Successfull Marriage – Rights of husband and wife

Bashar Shala

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Channel: Bashar Shala

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Alhamdulillah he some Al Hamdulillah

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Anna Anna Sharqiya

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Takala Hakata Kotti he wala illa Anta Muslim moon, you had NASA Takara Baku Mala the Halacha community Wahida wahala come in Huzzah. Jaha Well, this time in humeri jellen kathira when he saw what Takala Hala de Tessa and whenever he will or hum in Allaha Cana La Cumbre Kiva, yo yo, hella Xena Avenue taco Allahu wa Kulu Kolon said either you say

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well, your fella comes in who back home or your trailer our Sula, who forgot as 1000 of Lima, ameba

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quarterly man. Your call will help conceal the Hannah who were to Isla Vicki Cherry Hill as he is warming it and Haleakala come in and fusi come as virgin liters, canoe Isla or Jala Bay in a coma word that Rama in a fidelity Kela at Nicole miyetti.

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Allah subhanho wa Taala made it one of his proofs, one of His Ayat, one of his signs that he created for ourselves from ourselves, spouses.

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And Allah says those spouses the purpose of that creation, Li Tuscano La Jolla, which is in a coma word that Rama that you shall settle in

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that you will have the tranquility within

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that you will have that happiness with that togetherness with your own spouses.

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And Allah put L Muda.

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And mawatha

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is one of those words that is somewhat hard to translate. It is taken from one of the names of Allah subhana wa taala. And we're dude

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and my word there

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is an adjective is it's a noun actually, from that. From that source from dude. It encompasses love and compassion, caring, and nurturing, all at the same time. And then Allah says Amen. And we know one of the greatest attributes that Allah had for himself is R Rahman r Rahim. And Allah says, between you and your spouse says, Allah put my word there and Rama

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and Allah says infidelity Can I attend the call me yet have a Koran. Indeed, there are signs that are proves there are a lot for those who want to ponder.

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And as a follow up of the last hooked by when

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our teacher chef yesterday spoke about divorce

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and end

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of a marriage

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that no one wants to get to.

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We want to speak today about what are the elements of a successful marriage? What would make a marriage flourish? What would make a marriage a successful marriage?

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That was the blessing of Allah subhanho wa Taala would not end

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in divorce.

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It would be a sign of Allah subhanho wa Taala it would be a marriage that truly

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blessed wisdom Allah and the Rama of Allah subhanho wa Taala because all the clues and all the elements of that successful marriage is not left

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for

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us to just play with it is all right there.

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And no Quran that Allah revealed to us and it is in the sunnah of our beloved prophet muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. It is all in the teachings of this perfect and complete religion of Islam.

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Because the marriage is what starts the cornerstone

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of the community of the Ummah and that is the family.

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And without a stone marriage, there is no strong family and without a strong family, there is no strong ummah.

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And for us to be hired our metanephric Jacqueline nurse for us to be the best armor and armor that will bring higher to him to mankind. We have to have strong marriages. We have to have marriages that have Melinda and Rama and have to have marriages that are signs and proofs and models for humanity.

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It is a sunnah

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of all the prophets, all the messengers of Allah to be married.

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Well nakodar Sal now Rusu Landmann Kubelik wa jal nella hum as Weijun with Alia, Allah says that we have sent Prophets messengers before you and we gave them spouses and the Ria

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and when Allah wanted to add them, our father to enter Jana

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Jana, Allah created her work for him, our mother, and he said you and your spouse intergender

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because even some of the best places, some of the best dwellings, some of the best abodes that Allah created with their spouses.

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With that a happy marriage.

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It's tasteless, it's empty.

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And for the house to be full with that mode then where the man was a happiness.

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Allah gave us

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a marriage in Islam that is based on the Quran, based on the Sunnah. And that's when the Muslim family starts.

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There are no vows to be exchanged.

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When you see an Islamic marriage, you don't see a husband and a groom and a bride standing there and they start exchanging promises

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to love and obey until death.

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Upon set us apart, etc, etc. And now these Vows get changed depending on how politically correct the times are. Why don't we have vows that we exchange in Islam because the Vows are there in the Quran and in the Sunnah, because the conditions of that marriage are not up to the bride and the groom to construct it is constructed by Allah subhanho wa Taala it is set by ALLAH SubhanA wa Taala and it is explained in the Sunnah of His Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam because when we get married, when the family starts, it starts based on the Quran and the Sunnah.

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And Allah called it Meetha Condoleezza. Allah call it a very heavy, very serious contract.

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Me thought

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it's a covenant. It's a very serious thing. That marriage, it's not something you play with, and the conditions of the marriage, the original conditions of the marriage, not just the mother or the dowry, but the marriage structure is set by ALLAH SubhanA wa Tada.

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And they're set by Allah for one purpose and one goal for us to be happy. That mythical leave. That contract is not set to put a burden on the family. It is set to lift a burden from the family. It is set to make the family happy to make the fathers the spouses, the husband's the wives happy.

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Allah wants us to be happy in our homes, happy in our marriages, happy in our dunya and happy in our era. And Allah says the path to happiness lays right there and following the path of Allah and his man

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messenger sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. And that's why there are three essential goals, three essential objectives of every marriage in Islam. And the first one Genbu sorority were the first shot is to bring happiness in and to repel evil.

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And the second one, at Tao no Albery, we're Taqwa a town Allah Pietila is to cooperate on obeying Allah subhana wa taala, and to have righteousness in the house. And the third

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is to raise the Islamic family

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to have that Islamic family the Islamic unit

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as part of the Ummah

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whether that marriage brings children or not,

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it still is a very important unit.

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It's still a very constructive unit,

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in the community and in the amount of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

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And for that, for every contract for every relationship, for it to be successful, for it to be fruitful, for it to be clear.

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There are rights and obligations.

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There are rights and obligations and for each party, to that contract that ALLAH SubhanA wa Taala described as Meetha Elisa as a very serious and a very important contract that we enter.

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In our lives when we get married,

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we have to understand that there are rights and obligations that come with that marriage.

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And those rights and obligations

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are set and the Quran and the Sunnah.

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So there are rights

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for the wife, there are rights for the husband, and there are mutual rights for both the husband and the wife.

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And let me start

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with the wife's rights.

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The wife

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and we start with the rights of women.

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Because the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam over and over and over again in his sunnah. And his Hadith emphasized their rights.

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And emphasized

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why it is important for men who throughout history

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had always the stronger corner and the upper hand.

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We may be living in a time now where it's politically incorrect to say that, but if we look at history,

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if we look at the last 1400 years

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whether we look at Europe at Asia, China and India, the Middle East and the Far East.

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More societies,

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men and their families had the upper hand and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam kept reminding men

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that your wives have rights.

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And he mentioned that

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in some of the most important speeches and gatherings and addresses that he had for the amorphous lamb

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including hotwire to Nevada, and his farewell address to this oma in hijet in Wada.

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And also on his death bed salatu salam Hadi

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he made it so clear and so important that it was one of the last things that he told the men of this OMA is so so beneath

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it stone soup in the Sci Fi era

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it is an agreed upon Hadith narrated didn't Bukhari and Muslim is so super nice to

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have higher, higher tier woman

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have goodness to them, take care of them.

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And another Hadith

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in head jetten, WADA the prophets Allah Allah Allah you

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Send them said isto Salvini say hi euro

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for in nama Hoonah I won on intercom

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take care of your women. Take care of your spouses of your wives.

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They're like,

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I want is like prisoners like I see right

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there just in your houses and you have control.

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Allah in there, let come Allah and he said come help car. One in he says eco Malaika aka the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam laid it out. He said, You have rights upon your women and you women have rights upon you.

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Here's the key to the successful Islamic marriage.

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He said How to whom I like how to come and I him. allow you to enter Photoshop Photoshop komentar Kahun Walla fie beauty complementor Cahoon wahala Hakuna Aleikum and tuxedo la hin FICO Swati hidden our parliament.

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He said your rights upon them, that no one shall enter your beds. And no one shall enter your houses that you don't like.

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And your their rights upon you that you should treat them well.

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And you should feed them well. And you should dress them well.

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And then a hadith

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narrated in Muslim.

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A solid sahih Hadith the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam

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told the men of this ummah

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you're free to move me no movement.

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Either I carry him in her hollow con rod the men

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or men of Islam.

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Don't

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look for perfection and your spouse's

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don't

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examine and critique every single aspect of your wives.

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You may hate not like dislike one aspect, but look at the positive side. Look at what you would like.

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And that goes into everything.

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The physical, the clock everything.

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You may not like one thing but look at what else did you bite like

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don't be too critical.

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Don't look for perfection

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the perfect wife does not exist because the birth perfect husband also does not exist.

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And that's why Allah subhanho wa Taala

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made a rule

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and how we deal with our wives. Allah subhana in the Quran said Wa she ruhuna Bill Morrow

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deal with them with Ma roof with good

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and the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said how you to come hydro company?

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Well Ana hydro comm literally the best of you is the best of you to his wives, and I am the best of you to my wives.

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And we know the hook of Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam in his homes. We go to the Sunnah we go to the Hadith, we see how he was the best of us and He is the best of us and He is the best of creations Allah Allah hottie he was Allah. We learn from him. How he dealt with his wives.

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He never raised his voice or his hand. He never lifted a finger.

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Despite problems, don't think that the house of the prophets of Allah Allah He was seldom was some romantic, romantic ideal house that was super human. It was a normal house where problems occurred.

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There were jealousy. There were issues there to the point that Allah subhanho wa Taala came to the aid of His Prophet Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, and Allah Himself threatened. The best wives the wives of the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, our mothers

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threading them was to luck with divorce, if they don't straighten up, and these are the best women in history

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our mothers

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so don't think that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam lived a life where he walked into the house and there were no issues.

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The man who had the weight of the world on his shoulders when he walked into his house, there were issues, the word problems, yet his voice was never heard.

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being loud.

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And he never ever left his hand

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upon a woman.

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When he walked into the house, the first thing he did

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is he cleaned his mouth

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by the embassy work

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because he wanted to smell well.

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So he can kiss his wife

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and he was never ashamed of that.

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He was never ashamed of declaring his love to his spouses.

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He was asked men that have been Nursey Laker Rasul Allah, who was the most beloved of people to you or prophet of Allah. And he said, Isha.

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And then the man who was asking, got embarrassed, he said, mean originally I mean of the men yeah rasool Allah. I don't mean that. He said a boo Ha, her father.

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Her father, he didn't say Abu Bakr.

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He said her father.

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He used to play with them. joke with them.

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We know the story when he raised with Aisha at a little bit of a jogging running race with him. She beat him one time. And then later on, he beat her and he said had he beat milk. Now I took this this was that

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he wasn't too serious, too harsh when he came into the house.

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And he used to consult with his wives.

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He didn't look at them.

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And he was the best of creation. He had.

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The way coming from the summer, from ALLAH SubhanA wa ala.

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There is no one that could compare to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. Yet he didn't feel that it would be too demeaning or too much. If he would ask almost Elena. What would she think

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was a problem when Al today via came the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam

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walked into the tent and she was with him. And the Sahaba were very unhappy with how the negotiation went. And he said to the Sahaba sallallahu alayhi wa sallam whom often how do we

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go just slaughter your Headey and then shave your heads and and the director of the Hadith said for Allah He might come I mean home Roger on why not? One person stood up and did what the prophets Allah Allah Allah Salam did, he said it three times and none of the Sahaba they were all very angry. And he walked up a non Muslim

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and then she said the Allah so Allah, don't say anything just go out. You slaughter your own Hedy and then you shave your head, and they will follow.

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He took her advice.

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And he followed the advice of almost selama

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he was too critical sallallahu alayhi wa sallam when he walked into his house. Why is this too dirty? Why is this to could not? Why? Why did you not do this? Why is this food not good?

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How many times I have said you have to do this. No one listens to me.

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I taken all the burden. I'm working all day long outside the house. And you forget what she does.

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When the prophets of Allah Azza wa sallam walked into his house.

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I should have said Ma, Allah He sallallahu alayhi wa sallam.

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He never criticized food ever

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Not that everything was put in front of him was top notch

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in Easter has che and Akella were illiterate

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and when he was at home, this is an ad Buhari.

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Can and maybe you're sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, you're calling fie Magneti Ali. Yeah, and if he if he'd met he actually is a hability Salah hora de la sala, when the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was at home, he was always at the help.

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Helping his household, helping his wife,

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helping the people of the house.

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He wasn't the king in the house.

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Now the Prophet salallahu alayhi wa sallam when they he came to the house,

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he would be exhausted, he would be tired, he would have problems that he would be solving much bigger

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than house chores, yet he didn't think it would be too much for him to help out, stretch your hand and show that loving, caring nature of the believer.

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And if we are to truly say, We are the followers of Muhammad Sallallahu he was saying

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if we are the men,

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the men

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the husbands

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who follow his sin,

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wasn't he men enough? will lie. He's more of a man than any of us.

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And he had no problem.

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In helping his wives and doing house chores, he used to fix his shoe. He used to prepare his own food. He used to help his family when it's time for Salah, he would go up to Salah

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one of the rights of women

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and that is unique in Islam, that wives no matter how rich they are.

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The expense

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has to be upon the husband.

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The husband has an obligation to spend upon the household.

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Even if the wife has money,

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and then that there is EDrum

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the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said dinakaran m factor houfy sebelah What dinakaran and factor hopefield I'll cover what dinar on tarso Dr. B He Allah miskeen what dinar on factor who Allah, Lake

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Huron, dinar on me factor who Allah Alec

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This is narrated on the authority of Abu Bakr Radi Allahu Allah and as narrated in Sahih Muslim, that the dinar that you spent feasable Allah, or a dinar gold coin that you spent in freeing a slave or a DNR that you give in charity upon a poor person, or a DNR that you give that you spent for your own family.

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The one that has the greatest reward is the one that you spend for the needs of your family. For the needs of your family.

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Women have rights. You can't leave your family in need.

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Even

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hint,

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the spouse of Abu Sufian when she came to give back to the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam after faith Mecca, the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam was taken down from the women while is rockin and they should not steal. And she said Abu Sufian Rajaram Buckfield Abu Sufyan is miserly and he doesn't spend on us. He leaves us in need, and I take money from his pocket.

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And the Prophet said, take your needs.

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That's your right.

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Take what you need.

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And another myth is some of the MaHA the Tao worries. Some people think when they put them out there more and more.

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That the more AHA is something the women get only when they get divorced or if they get divorced.

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And Allah subhana wa sallam said, Why tunisair So Ducati Ducati Hinden.

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The entire sada cart. So to heart the entire dowry, the entire Mahara belongs to the woman.

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If you don't give her the entire thing upfront, one of two things has to happen. She either forgive you clearly without any pressure

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or it is a debt in the neck a debt for the husband. When someone dies that death has to be paid before

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the inheritance is divided.

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The third right of a woman upon her husband is to be shielded from hellfire

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husbands have an obligation upon their own families. Being a leader in the House, having the upper hand comes with an obligation

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that Allah Subhana Allah says yeah, you have Latina Iman who, who and forsaken where he come now. Naraku harness one Hey, Jarrah, are you who believe she'd yourselves and your families from the Hellfire that is fueled by humans and by stones by rocks?

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So the man has an obligation and it is an obligation upon the man of the family

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to teach his family, Allah Clark al Makarem, the manners

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to make sure Salah is being established in the house, to make sure that the Islamic court of appearance is being established in the house.

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That making sure that Islam is the code of the house.

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To make sure they bear in the Mima and Backbiting is not being practiced in the house. As long as he knows.

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Allah says what Amala Allah can be solid he was stubborn Allah

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command your family will salah.

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It is the rights of the wives that have to be fulfilled in this marriage, but also the husbands have rights.

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And they have a lot of rights. That Allah and His Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam

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clearly, and the Quran and Sunnah. And the Quran wala Hoonah Mr. Liddy Allah hinda Bill Morrow, while originally Allah Hinata Raja.

00:32:58--> 00:33:08

And they have rights, they have obligations just like they have rights Allah says about the woman while the Hoonah Mithuna lazy Allah hinda been Maru.

00:33:09--> 00:33:19

While you're really Allah Hinata Raja, and the men have Adonijah and this is the controversial Daraja but there is really no controversy in it.

00:33:22--> 00:33:23

Because that dough Raja

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is that obligation that Allah put upon the man

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and the responsibility that Allah put upon the husband in leading the family. And that husband will be answering before Allah subhanho wa Taala on the day of judgment.

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And discolor says is the donnager Regina, our Mona Lisa,

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that the men have Kawana custody

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upon women

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with important things, one of them is what we just talked about

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the obligation of the man to spend upon his family

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and when you have an obligation and a responsibility, Allah gives you some authority to fulfill that obligation and responsibility. And Allah gave the obligation and the responsibility upon the man

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to lead his family into righteousness and to make sure that the Meetha that the contract that the covenant before Allah subhana wa Taala Allah put the man in custody of making sure it's fulfilled

00:34:44--> 00:34:46

and for that, Allah

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put a right upon the wives to obey the husbands in that

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and that's when the Prophet SAW

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Allah how to sell and sell in the Hadith allow you to come behind the madness and Mark, the best treasure for the man and murderer to solve. The righteous woman, either another ILA has a rot. When he looks at her, she makes him happy. Why is there another her fight? When he asked her when he commands her with something, She obeys? Why they're unhappy a lot. And when he leaves her and he's not with her, she preserves him, she keeps him.

00:35:31--> 00:35:42

She protects his honor. She protects his house, she protects his reputation. She protects what he likes. And she does not do what he does not like.

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Have you thought tough enough see her WOMAD?

00:35:50--> 00:35:53

In the Hadith, narrated on Abby Hurayrah

00:35:54--> 00:36:20

the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam lays the reward for a woman like that is selected to Hamsa wa salam at shahada well Hassan it for Jehovah, we're apart so Jehovah beat Allah had hoody Jana time in a year boy Beheshti when the woman praise her five times. And she fast her month of Ramadan and she preserves her chastity and She obeys her husband.

00:36:22--> 00:36:27

Allah tells her on the Day of Judgment enters Jenna enter Jana from whichever gate you like.

00:36:30--> 00:36:39

So there are rights for the husbands. When they fulfill the obligations and the rights they have the right to be obeyed.

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In the obedience of Allah subhanho wa Taala

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and the rights of the husband as well is their houses and their honor and their religion their deen is to be preserved in their houses. For salejaw to quantitate on half is often delayed the Mahaffey of Allah, Allah says, And the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said elmora Toora atone fee bait is LG ha will miss all that on camera Yeti ha.

00:37:10--> 00:37:19

The woman is in custody is in charge in the house of her husband and she will be asked she will be responsible.

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This religion is perfect. Brothers and sisters, this religion, Allah subhanho wa Taala made this religion so we all are happy and we have happy houses and happy time together. And at the end, we reach Allah subhanho wa Taala and we enter into His pleasure.

00:37:45--> 00:37:59

So we ask Allah Subhana Allah to Allah to make our houses a beacon of light. An example of happy marriages and happy families. Only Heather was tougher Allah Allah Lima Lee welcome FEHA 1000 Mustafi

00:38:01--> 00:38:03

please come forward and make sure your cell phones are turned off.

00:38:33--> 00:38:40

hamdu Lillahi Rabbil Alameen wa salatu salam ala Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi edge main.

00:38:41--> 00:39:00

There are rights for the husbands, there are rights for the women, for the wives, and there are mutual rights for both of them. There are rights for both that have to be preserved. And that is one of them is Elma roof to be dealing with one of each other and the best manner and the best way possible.

00:39:02--> 00:39:09

The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said that you should keep each other's privacy and each other's secrets.

00:39:10--> 00:39:14

You have that privacy in your own homes.

00:39:15--> 00:39:17

And you should not let it go beyond

00:39:20--> 00:39:43

your own households. And Muslim. The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said in naming Sheree NASCI in the law he menzi Latin yo Malkia Raju Do you feel Emirati? Well to have the lay the man show to a huduma Cirrus is one of the worst people before Allah on the Day of Judgment, that her husband

00:39:45--> 00:39:53

isn't it our wives? Isn't it our spouses that we should bring a roof? We're not here until munkar two

00:39:54--> 00:39:59

and if we don't have that with our spouses, how do you think that will be transmitted to our children?

00:40:00--> 00:40:07

If we ignore Amobi my roof and they're here and elmen car, within our own families

00:40:08--> 00:40:14

how are we going to bring it to humanity? How are we going to bring it to our community

00:40:17--> 00:40:33

the roller mill said that the sign of a good marriage that the husband practices in his house among be my roof and when a hen and in Mancha and the wife practices in her house, among be my roof, wanna hear and and in my uncle.

00:40:35--> 00:40:37

When we do that,

00:40:38--> 00:40:39

brothers and sisters,

00:40:40--> 00:40:43

Allah Subhana Allah Allah describes

00:40:44--> 00:41:10

that we become coolness of the eye for one another, we become a source of joy for one another, we become a source of happiness, and it is the dua of the believers Robina habla Amin and Virgina was reacting Kurata iron ore journal in Mata Karina Imam Robina hablan I mean, as well Gina was reacting Kurata ion or journaling

00:41:12--> 00:41:58

Robina hablan ominous word you know whether Yeah, Tina Kurata Yan, or Janelle in Kenya Imam. We ask Allah Subhana Allah to Allah to make our households houses of happiness, houses of righteousness. Houses of Eman houses a following the Sunnah of Mohamed Salah hottie he was salam houses that follow the house of the best of creation Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam, we ask Allah subhana wa Taala to make our the husbands of this community some of the best husbands of Islam and to make the wives of the community some of the best wives of Islam. We ask Allah subhanaw taala to revive the Sunnah in our community to revive in our household. Allahu Melaka Al hamdu Hatta Tada, Allah can

00:41:58--> 00:42:44

handle either lead or SallAllahu ala Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi Germain Allahumma Suriel islam al Muslimeen Allahumma Alia Mowlana Kalamata unhappy with Dean Allahumma Menara double Islam even Muslim in a short run for who out there as he is in Moqtada Allahu Mammon Ardabil Islami one misdemeanor higher on fire and who Allah Delhi Qayyarah Alameen Allah Who Malaika Via de Dini for in the home layer the Sunnah Chiara Bella Alameen Allahu mehg al Qaeda home fina Cody him what is the errata so we Allah him yeah Bella Alameen Allahu masa him Allah homothetic home vida de Allahumma bene Allah to her that Amin home I had Allah Who Malaika Beeman Solomon Muslimeen Allah Who Malaika

00:42:44--> 00:43:30

believe him and Solomon Mustafa FeedDemon and misdemeanor Yara Bella al Amin, Allahu Monthsary one and F equally McCann Allahu Mansuri one and mustafina Freemason Allahu Mustonen, one Anamosa Dafina fee Philistine, Allah hoomans sir Weimin Masjid Al Aqsa Bella Alameen Allahu Montessori one and and mustafina Fie Surya, Allah home Montessori one and mustafina equally McCann ner hamara him in Allah Humann Serene mustafina Will Urmila wellness Akina Arabella al Amin, Allahu medica belly shahada when moutier Come in acromion Allahu Malaika Via de madera de Nia or hamara Amin wa SallAllahu ala Muhammad wa ala he was Sofia Jemaine Allahu

00:43:31--> 00:43:41

Allahu manana Celica Asian Hania wa Moulton Surya, warmer than Allah for the shinier hammer hamara Hemi nya or hammer Rahimi hon al Amin, welcome salah.