Yusha Evans – How to Manage Stress

			Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakatu. This is just a small snippet, we're going to start putting
some some smaller clips on the YouTube channel of just some general tips and advices. And, and
motivations and whatnot. One of the things that that I found to be very helpful for me, I have a lot
of coaching and counseling clients who come to me, and they're overwhelmed, and I've been there
myself, I know what it feels like to be overwhelmed, overstressed. You just don't know where you're
going in life, what you need to do next, so many things are drowning you out. And I've given them
this advice. And this advice has worked well for me. And it's worked well, for many of the clients
		

			that I've I've given this to, is, take all of the things in your life that are stressing you, and
write them down all of the things in your life that are stressing you and that are putting your
wissen that are that are causing you sleepless nights that are messing with your head, and write
them down. And then get another piece of paper and draw a line down the middle and make a list with
two sides. On one side of that list, write things that I can control. On the other side of that
list, write things that I cannot control, and then start listing your stresses listing your
stresses, and ask yourself, Is this something I can control? Or is it something I can't control, if
		

			it's something you can control, for instance, let's say it's your it's your health, you know, I
mean, you're, you're you're overweight, or you need to exercise more things of that nature. Put that
on the side of things that I can control, and then start writing a plan of what you're going to do
to take control of that, write it down, write it down the things like three step plan, three small
steps that I'm going to do to better that, like my health, I'm going to start eating better, I'm
going to start sleeping better. And I'm going to start exercising. So these are three things that
you know. So now your brain knows, interestingly, your brain understands that these things are
		

			written down, we have a plan for them, it's not going to stress about them as much because our brain
likes to protect us, right? It's it's going to try to do things that remind you to protect yourself.
So if it knows us something wrong, it's going to continue to bother you about it. But your brain has
this way of knowing that if it's written down, if there's a plan, then it won't stress over it as
much. Because you can continue to look at that and put that list somewhere where you can see it
there. Look, we have a plan for this, we're working on it in sha Allah. So continue to do that. If
something on that list is something you cannot control, then put it on the other side. And those
		

			things, those things which you cannot control. For instance, let's say it's how someone is behaving
towards you. Or it's, for instance, the weather, let's say is the weather is too hot, it's too cold,
it's too so is that something we can control? No, we can't control it. Put those things on the side
of the list that you cannot control and those things that you cannot control. Give them to Allah
subhanho wa Taala those are the things you have to let go of brothers and sisters because if we
don't let go those a lot of times I will see people holding on to stressors about things that they
cannot control. And if you can't control them, they will control you, they will control your stress,
		

			they will control your anxiety. Those are the things you have to let go of, and leave to ALLAH
SubhanA Wattana these are the things you make dua about these are the things you get up in the
middle of the night and pray tahajjud about these are the things like let's say you've applied for a
job, right, or you're trying to get a new position in your job. And you don't know whether or not
it's going to be accepted, you don't know whether or not you're going to get the job, you don't know
whether or not you're going to get the raise, etc. That's not something you can control you if
you've done everything you can, and now it's out of your hands, you put that on the side of the list
		

			of things you can not control. And you give that to Allah subhanho wa Taala Anna, because when you
codify things like this, and you put it somewhere you will you can see it every single day. Like for
me, my list is right there on the side of my office, I see it every day of the things I can and
can't control and the things that I can control, my brain knows we have a plan, that we're working
on these things, and the things that I cannot control. These things are the things that we leave to
Allah subhanaw taala these are the things that we have to have to work cool about to what cool means
that you've let it go, and you leave it to Allah subhanho wa Taala you don't know how he's going to
		

			solve it. You don't know what the plan is, you don't know what's going to happen. You have no
control of the outcome. But nevertheless, nevertheless, you trust and Allah subhanho wa Taala you
leave it to him. This is going to make your life and your stressors so much easier to manage and
maintain. Because if not we will continue to wreck ourselves about things that either we can do
something about, but we're not. And that's our problem, right? That's, that's something we can self
correct. If there are things that are stressing you that you can do something about and you're not
that will be a constant source of stress. So make sure you make that plan and start working on it
		

			incrementally. You don't have to change overnight. Let me tell you something, brothers and sisters,
progress is not linear, right? And it's not an event. Progress is not linear, and it's not an event
meaning
		

			that you don't just have something happen in your new person, you have to work at that every single
day, you're going to have some days where you advance, and you're gonna have some days where you
have setbacks, you're gonna have another days where you advance more. And then you have a setback,
advance setback, advance setbacks, progress is not linear, it's not just some line curvature that
goes straight up, you're gonna go up, and then maybe sideways, where you're not really making a lot
of progress. And you're gonna go down some up, down. So understand that you also have to be kind to
yourself, you have to be kind to yourself, and never, ever, ever let me tell you, when you make
		

			these plans, the things that you can work on, make a plan. This is where you need discipline,
discipline is better than motivation. Motivation is overhyped, right? People say you need to be
motivated, yes, you can't be motivated all the time. No one, no one can be motivated. Every single
day, it's an almost impossibility, no one's motivated every single day, and half the time, more than
half the time, I would say 70 80% of the time, you're gonna have to do things simply because you
have to do them. This is where discipline is more important than motivation, discipline, meaning
that I'm going to do these things, regardless of how I feel. I'm going to get up and get out of bed
		

			and do these things. Regardless of what my mind is telling me. Regardless of what my body is telling
me. I'm going to push forward and do them anyway. Because as you become disciplined to doing those
things regularly, they will become habits and creating good habits will change the parameters and it
will change the the prognosis and outcome of your life. So you have to do that. But on the other
side, the things that we cannot control. Those are the things that we have to have hope and Allah
subhanahu wa to Anna, we have to have to walk within him. We have to have reliant trust on him. And
I remember there's a Hadith of the Prophet salallahu Alaihe Salam, where in he said that Allah
		

			laughs right Allah laughs and one of the companions as the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam. He
said, Ya rasool Allah, so you're telling me that Allah laughs He said, Yes. And so it is said that,
how could we be despondent? How could we not have hope? And not rob, who laughs in a manner that
befits his majesty and glory, but he laughs any It is said that I'll rub that laughs a lord that
laughs Then he is a lord that is going to be generous and bountiful and merciful to us, so we should
never lose hope. And Allah subhanho wa Taala Anna, because he loves all of those who believe and he
said other Phil Hellmuth Minoo, the believers will be successful. So if we maintain our belief, if
		

			we maintain the belief in Allah and His Messenger, la salatu salam, then we will be successful, we
have to have hope in that. And that is where the things that we cannot control will lead them to
Allah. We don't know what the plan is, but we trust the planner. So brothers and sisters, take the
small advice from me. The things that are stressing you in your life, do this list, do this list and
work on it, the things that you can work on work on the things that you can't control. You also work
on those by leaving them to Allah and not allowing yourself to continue to dwell and stress over
things you can't have any control over. And let me know how it works for you. And also if you think
		

			this is helpful, let me know in the comments or other tips that you would like to see or other
suggestions you have for little shorter videos that we have, we're going to do quite often in sha
Allah, then drop them in the comments below. In sha Allah and if you want to become a counseling or
coaching client and want to have one out one to one sit down sessions let me the link is in the
description. So more YouTube videos to come in sha Allah look forward to the next one. I love you
all for the sake of Allah subhanho wa Taala Anna was an MIT come or Rahmatullahi or briquette