Youssra Kamel Kandil – My story with the elderly lady the night before I left Medina

			Salam aleikum wa rahmatullah wa barakato. Harsh 2018 A totally unexpected and unplanned trip to
visit our last panel, Dallas house. And the amount of stories and the amount of lessons that we
learned is just endless. But I want to share one story that really resonated with me from ash this
year. So 100 layer up we went, and we were able to go to Mina complete all our, you know, monastic
of hygiene. And now we're waiting for the last three days of Jama ROTC, and I recall it was that she
actually I believe, and he came to our tent and he was talking to us about how to know if a person
is like, you know, have a lot you know, a person with Allah, how do you follow a person and know
		

			that this person is a good person. And I remember he said, two qualities, a person being upright, or
the upper righteousness of him. And the second thing was his servitude. And the word stuck with me
Subhanallah we finished our days in Mina. And we took our buses went to Medina and visited Rasul
Sai, salam, very beautiful Medina was pretty empty the first night we arrived, so we were able to
really enjoy it. And the days went by second third day, and then now, it was almost the last day and
we're leaving in the morning. And subhanAllah, you know, once you're done with them, and as that you
find yourself getting a little bit distracted, like, oh, I have to get gifts for my family and for
		

			my kids and my kids and whatnot. And I found this like kind of a hardness in my heart. And I was
like, you know, I'm leaving tomorrow morning, I shouldn't be here shopping, I should be in you know,
the message nervous will offer a signal. And I felt a little bit disappointed with myself. So I
quickly went back to the hotel, you know, got to clean garments on and I was like, This is it. This
is a night I'm going to spend all night in the road on sha Allah make Doha and you know, just be
neutral. So Lhasa Salam, and I get there, and my heart is still feeling this hardness like I can't
even tear up and I just couldn't understand why. And if you've ever been to Medina, you'll see that
		

			women who are in wheelchairs, once they come to a certain area, they can't actually access or go
inside demonstrate, unless they have another woman to push them. And so I'm walking in and I hear
this elderly lady and her son and she's telling him, but I really want to go in how am I going to go
in and he's like, I don't know what to do for you on me. You know, I'm really sorry. So I was like,
You know what, I'll take your mother in and meet us back in a little bit. So I take her in we go on
the wheelchair. And for my disappointment they decided to close the road a half an hour early that
day because it was so crowded people had started to come back from Mecca and for a minute you know,
		

			and my heart just sank like I was like is Alana happy with me is that it I'm not going to be able to
go and give proper Salam Surah suicide Salam and I went out with her and you know, and she was so
sad. So I told her son like meet me tomorrow inshallah after salted fish. And I will take her and I
went back to the hotel very, very sad. And I was like, I have to come back early the next day, I
went the next morning. And may Allah forgive me a part of me wanted not to find her. Because I
wanted to spend those last minutes just for myself with Ross was LM, I wanted to visit I wanted to
sit and make dua, you never know when you're going to come back again. And I went there and I prayed
		

			five should look for her. She wasn't there. And I was like, You know what, I'll just give her five
more minutes so that I don't have that guilt on me. So I went back again out after a preach pledge
book for her and she was not there. And I'm standing waiting for her. And I'm thinking, okay, great,
I'm gonna be able to really just worship on my own. And the hardness is still there in my heart. And
I overhear the same scenario that happened last night, another ultra lady, and this time they're
leaving, and she tells her son, I can't believe I came here. And I couldn't even go inside the
masjid and grievous wasallam. And inside of me, I start remembering the words of Shadi and words of
		

			servitude is not just about being a pride, it's not just about your worship, but serving others. And
immediately I start feeling guilty. And I'm like, Should I tell her I'll take your engine, I'll just
go and enjoy myself. And then I was like, I can't. So I told the brother, I will take her in and
meet us in another three hours or so. I take the elderly lady and she was very, you know, very, very
old, so she couldn't handle sitting in the chair. And as soon as we go in, they put us in this very
tight, like, you know, the, the passage that's between the columns there, and they make a stand
there for about almost two hours. So Subhanallah because of that, you know, I'm stuck. There's
		

			wheelchairs behind me on my left, there's the pillars on my right side. There's nowhere for me to go
except to be in this place. And there's a grand next to me. So I pick up the Koran, and I start
reading first was finished the first was second just finish the book or go into LA I'm gonna and I'm
like Subhanallah if I was not put here, I would have never read that much Qur'an. Eventually they
start opening the door for us and she's getting very tired, she's cranky, she's very upset. People
are pushing us, bumping us with the wheelchairs and the Hardness is still there. Finally, we
		

			So they're older. And they have this whole entire area that's just cord owned for people who are in
wheelchairs. And they take her from me and they let her pray. And I'm not talking about like a, like
a rope or something. I'm talking about like a real corridor. So nobody's pushing you, nobody's
shoving you. You have your own area. And I'm standing waiting, and I'm thinking to myself, am I
going to be able even to pray because I can't leave her. And then all of a sudden, this lady calls
me, she's like, You come over here, go inside and pray with her.
		

			And subhanAllah my heart at that moment just melted. That moment was like when I understood as I
took her, and she was crying, and I am crying. When you serve people, that's when your heart cracks,
that's when the harshness opens up and the light goes through into your heart. The entire time we're
walking out, she's crying, making up for me, I'm crying, making dua for her because, because of her,
I was able to pray in this very special place without being pushed or shoved for the last moments
before I led like leave Medina, I was able to read so much Koran and be in this special place,
because of that service. Right? And doesn't end here. We're leaving. And my as I'm getting closer to
		

			the door, I'm thinking to myself, how am I going to pull her down the ramp? There is no way with,
you know, I was going to be able to do it. She's, you know, you know, an elderly lady, that
wheelchair is very heavy on the ramp. I've seen people like you could really I'm going to either
fall or she's going to fall for me. And I'm crying, but I'm thinking like, how am I going to do this
and there weren't that many people around. And subhanAllah we get right outside and I bent down and
putting her shoes on and then I'm getting my shoes and as I'm bending down my eyes like I see couple
of feet coming from inside woman and my eye just like kind of like fell in someone's feet over there
		

			in the in the back. And I didn't eye contact with this lady. There was no gesture to show that I
even needed help. And subhanAllah Allah and I'm getting up and somebody grabs the wheelchair from
next to me and I look up and it's that lady that I was looking at. She comes just takes the chair
goes down the ramp. And I'm standing there thinking to myself, like how did she know that? This lady
needed help? How did you know that I needed help. I walked down to her down the steps and I'm like,
How did you know I was going to ask you she just smiled at me and she walked away. Subhanallah and
to me I just think like, this is like the reward of servitude when you really serve others when you
		

			really put others needs ahead of yours. And you understand it's not just about me worshipping and me
praying, but it's me also helping others. That's when Allah subhanaw taala really gives you that
gives you that light and sends you those who will aid you in sha Allah