Taimiyyah Zubair – Taleem al Quran 2012 – P15 143C Tafsir Bani Israil 24

Taimiyyah Zubair
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The speakers stress the importance of showing mercy and compassion when dealing with elderly parents and older parents. They emphasize the need for parents to provide constant nutrition and activity to their children to ensure healthy growth. The speakers also emphasize the importance of accepting and embracing parents' advice, learning how to parent children, and finding common ground between family members and oneself to achieve success.

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			Okay let's move on to the next day and inshallah This matter will be clarified for us what fifth
Lahoma and Lord to them what fifth heartfelt mud Kafala to Lord coffee Allah told Rafi or the Day of
Judgment will bring down those who are high. So what failed lower bend, go down, bring down level
math for them meaning for both your parents. Jana has
		
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			the wings of humility. What is Jana Jana wings of a bird or the side of a person and the word
Jeanette is also used for hand or for arm. Okay, so your side your arm? What should you do? Allah
says wha filled lore it Lahoma for them do not have the the wing of humility. What is the humility
to be humble before someone. So literally, when you go in front of them, be humble. show humility,
show them your submissive side. So when you sit in front of them, don't sit arrogantly when you
stand in front of them. Don't stand arrogantly. When you speak to them, don't speak arrogantly.
Speak with humility, so they can talk to you. Otherwise, what will happen if you're rude with them?
		
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			If you're tough with them, you're arrogant with them? Will they even be able to talk to you know, so
be extra humble before your parents? And remember, this is all talking about when they're old when
parents have reached old age. So especially when parents age then be even more humble? Why Mina Rama
out of mercy. Come on? Don't they deserve mercy? Look at how much they've done for you. And look at
the difficulties of life that they are going through me parents do they live in easy life?
		
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			Think about it a man. What is he doing working in a place that he hates? Basically, he'd rather be
home spending time with his kids. But where is he sitting in an office that doesn't even have a
window? sitting in an office which is full of dust, dealing with a boss that is drunk half the time?
Or dealing with problems at work that are extremely annoying.
		
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			It's not easy to work. It's difficult. Any person who works in the outside world just go ask them.
Do you love your job? Yeah, I like it. However, this and this and this really annoys me. I
		
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			mean, there are people whose eyesight becomes weak because of the kind of work they do. Whose hands
they become so weak because the kind of work that they do. Parents, you know, they've been working
physically, they've been working, why to make money to bring food to you. To buy clothes for you, to
buy treats for you. So have mercy on them, show mercy to them. And out of that mercy. be humbled
before them. Don't stand arrogantly in front of them. don't deal with them, as if you're dealing
with a two year old. Warfield Lahoma Jenna had the lemonade Rama will call and say make the offer
them. What do I should you make for them? A bit hum Homer come on up banning saline.
		
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			But I'll be oh my lord, it'll harm Homer. You have mercy on my parents, comma, because or just as
Rob Bayani, they raised me so the Euro a small meaning when I was small. When I was little, they
raised me. Now notice over here, what is the dua for Oh Allah have mercy on my parents.
		
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			Earlier, in the same Maya what was said, show humility to them out of mercy. Meaning, be merciful
towards your parents. Be compassionate, be kind, be gentle. And also ask Allah to be merciful
towards your parents, because your parents, what do they need? Mercy.
		
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			That's what they need. Because the fact is that no person can be kind to another unless Allah allows
him to feel mercy for that individual. Otherwise, there could be a sick person in front of you and
injure person in front of you. But your heart doesn't move. You have no compassion for them.
		
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			They're dying, they're miserable, but you don't feel anything for them. So Oh Allah, you have mercy
on my parents, so that I feel mercy for them. Because remember that Allah subhanaw taala, he
provides his servants through what through means.
		
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			And, or Allah, you show mercy to my parents, because when Allah who will be merciful towards an
individual, then their difficulties will be alleviated, then their sickness will end, then the
problems that they face in life will reduce. So Rob
		
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			Burnham, Homer, oh my lord, you have mercy upon them. And the fact is that no matter how much we do
for our parents, can we ever repay them? No, we can never repay them. Remember the incident where a
man was, you know, making his mother do Hajj, how on his shoulders, and he was told by one of the
companions, that you haven't really given your parents back what they deserve from you. You haven't
given them their Huck, not even for one night, not even for one mourn, you know, one scream of agony
that your mother made when she was in the pains of labor, giving birth to you. So we can never repay
our parents. This is why we ask Allah or Allah, you have mercy on them, so that I have summer in
		
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			dealing with my parents, and my parents also, as you're aging, as they're dealing with their
problems. They develop patience also, so that they are good with me. They are tolerant with me, we
have a good relationship, or they're humble man.
		
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			And why make this dua that Allah you have mercy on them because Rabbani Salam, O Allah, they raised
me when I was little auto Bayani is from Rob back tarbiyah. Laba is to grow, the word Reba is from
the same root interest because interest is what grows on top of the initial amount. All right, and
Rob bear is to do tarbiyah, what is done via
		
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			to foster to allow an insurer growth
		
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			to allow an insurer growth to develop something, someone how by providing constant nutrition.
		
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			So what's your goal to make something grow to develop it? And how is it that you develop it by
providing it constant nutrition by looking after it? Now as human beings as we grow? What do we
need? What are we in need of any young mothers over here with babies or with toddlers?
		
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			Raise your hand please quickly. Okay. So when you look after your child, what are you concerned
about?
		
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			Their health, okay, so when it comes to their health, their diet, what they're eating? Have you ever
seen a mother feeding a toddler? Anybody? Have you ever seen them feeding children? How is it
children eat so nicely, so easily? You just give them the food and they will eat? Yeah, a mother
will go crazy, literally crazy trying to feed her child.
		
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			This is that'll be
		
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			the pains that a mother goes through to ensure that her child is healthy. And eating good is just
one part of being healthy.
		
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			In addition to eating good, what else is it that you're concerned about?
		
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			Their exercise, enough movement, fresh air. So even though the mother wants to take a nap, she will
take her child for a walk. She wants to go home and cook and the child wants to be at the park.
Really.
		
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			So their physical growth also, in addition to physical growth, what else for the mind. And this is
why you see parents buying such expensive toys which are good for their for the brain of the child,
right? reading to a child, showing them books, doing activities with them literally sitting on the
ground, and playing with the baby. Why? Because dunbia it includes all of this health, mind, and
also emotionally because you want the child to be emotionally strong. So cuddling, hugging, picking
them up, literally holding the baby in one arm and cooking with the other.
		
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			I think it was a blessing that my sister was born when I was in grade seven. So she's five now
because I practically remember everything like my mom when she was pregnant with my sister and
everything and how much like she used to vomit and after she was born, and I saw everything. And so
when she was a child, it was much easier to feed her now. Like yesterday, my mom asked me can you
just feed her the lunch because I'm going to take a shower. And I'm like, Okay, fine shirts, just
noodles. And I tried it took me literally about an hour to feed the child. And I was just thinking
like, How does my mom do it and my mom that she has everything scheduled like she has to sleep at
		
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			this time and this time and this time, she could only watch a video for this time because then
she'll get tired. And my mom has to literally schedule her life around my sister's life. Basically
parents lose their life.
		
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			They lose their life when children come in. A mother doesn't have anything such as me time. No, no
you forget about yourself when you have a baby. Because you can't sleep when you want you cannot get
up when you want you cannot even use the bathroom when you want. Sorry. Nothing like that.
		
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			I was just thinking of the fact that you're actually alive till now. You owe them so much love and
risk
		
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			back, because I remember learning a toddler when they're young, they can die if they don't have
enough love, because they will cry, and they will cry until their brain and their neurons just shut
off and like, no one's here to care for me and their body can die out of that emotional depression,
stuff it alone.
		
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			There's a quote, when it comes to your EBA, or Sen is the most we can do when it comes to dealing
with parents, their sign is the least we can do. Amazing, the least we can do when dealing with our
parents.
		
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			So I feel like Allah spent Allah is focused on dealing with our parents with SN and the best
mannerisms and old age. And the only way to possibly do that is if we've been treating them that
way. Ever since we were young, it's only possible to be able to be patient with someone if you are
used to that type of behavior. So you have to be patient and humble, and you know, obeying your
parents since childhood, to be able to deal with them in a more difficult age.
		
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			And the one thing that will always convince you to be good to your parents is what? They took care
of me when I was little. That's it period. They took care of me when I was little. Because the thing
is that as human beings we need each other.
		
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			Right? We cannot live on our own. Or can we? Can we survive on our own? No. We are so needy from the
moment we are born for what? For food? For love. Right? For hugs, for kisses for cuddles? Right? We
are so needy? For so many things. I mean, when is it that a child can independently use the
bathroom?
		
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			independently?
		
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			Seven maybe that they can go to the bathroom and wash themselves and you know, take care of their
issues themselves. And the mother doesn't have to come in or the father doesn't have to come in.
Think about for seven years you're wiping somebody training them? Isn't that enough of epsa?
		
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			Think about it.
		
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			If somebody prepares food for us for three days, because we were sick, and they're bringing it to
us. We feel like oh my god, they've done so much for me. How can I ever repay them?
		
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			You know, your mom cooked for you every day. And she fed you every day not just once, but multiple
times? How can you ever repay your mother?
		
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			If somebody gives us a gift of $1,000 We'd be like, Oh my God.
		
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			Even if I disagree with them, I cannot say anything to them. You know, it's a very awkward
situation, you know, because they've been so generous with me, they gave me $1,000. So I kind of
have to agree with them and support them in everything that they do. Our fathers have given us more
than $1,000. But yet, yet we raise our voices, and yet we disrespect them.
		
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			Or a bit hum Homer come on up Ben insulated. They took care of me when I was little, I couldn't
change myself. I couldn't look after myself. And my parents looked after me. So Oh, Allah,
		
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			Be merciful towards my parents.
		
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			I would like to say, assign is a very higher level. And
		
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			everybody go through trial in the life and you will have good and bad relationships with parents and
those times. So if you're just thinking that Allah Tala has chosen those parents for me, because I
mean, we choose our friends, we choose our spouses in certain cases. And with spouses, there is a
possibility that divorces can happen and people can remarry. But those are the parents that Allah
Tala has chosen from the whole world. So if we are just accepting them for that reason that this is
the choice that Allah has made, and I'm going to be good to them. And then during your life, you try
to make it a peaceful and respectful environment where you will have healthy communication, just to
		
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			lead to this level, just Akela high for pointing that out. You know, for good communication. What is
really, really important is that you open your heart before you open your mouth. And what it means
by opening your heart is that you embrace the person you accept them the way they are, they are
faulty, they're imperfect, they have problems, they have issues, there are things about them that
you don't like, but still you embrace them. You accept them the way they are. And when you will
accept them the way they are acknowledging their good and their bad. Only then you can communicate
with them properly. So open your heart before you open your mouth.
		
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			Oh my god. When I went to university I learned about like two key pieces of research that helped me
understand like, why we should be real
		
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			We got to our parents. In neuroscience, we learned that the teenage brain is very different from the
adult brain. And the prefrontal cortex, which is in charge of like decision making, and good
judgment is not fully developed until you're like 1920. So you know how we argue with our parents,
when we're teenagers, maybe we need to accept that they are right, and we are wrong. And we might
not be able to judge a situation as good as they can. And we need to accept that. And another piece
of research I learned was, like parents who follow up with their kids and ask, like, where you
going? And afterward they ask, Where where are you? What did you do? Who are you with, like, we
		
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			think those are annoying, but really, that following up keeps children like out of doing things that
are really bad. And it's that research has shown me like that just that follow up that we find a so
annoying is really, really helpful for us. And a lot of kids don't have parents who do that, because
they're either orphans, or they have like single mom who was working like two different jobs, and
she is not able to ask them those questions. And sometimes parents are also neglectful, like, they
don't care. So we're really lucky that our parents ask us, and they follow with us, and we shouldn't
be annoyed. They care about us. And the things that I mean, you do feel annoyed, obviously, if
		
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			somebody's constantly asking you, you do feel annoyed. But at that time, I can realize that, okay,
somehow they weren't good for me. I don't know how but somehow they weren't good for me. So even if
I don't understand what they're saying, and why they're saying, You know what, I'll just accept it.
Because Allah subhanaw taala has told me do your son with my parents simple. That's it. You don't
have to 100% agree with them. You don't have to like what they're telling you to do.
		
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			You understand? But accepting, that's possible. That is something that you can do, you can accept
what they're telling you to do. And if you do that, eventually, hopefully, things will improve. And
that accepting despite your dislike, despite your hesitation, that is Ersan,
		
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			I just would like to add it. I'm a parent myself, and I'm a teacher, too. And so I've seen and met
parents, Muslims or non Muslims. And it's a very difficult task for everybody. And you see excellent
parents who could be Muslims or non Muslims. And you could have parents who are not that good
parents. But really, a lot of us just don't know how to parent and nobody wants to really learn. I'm
not saying nobody, but a lot of parents, they really don't want to acknowledge that this is
something that need to learn. So sometimes they tried to do their best. And they don't know the
changes, or it's not only cultural, like it's everywhere. So you just have to give them that little
		
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			place that they really don't know. And most of the time they are trying to do their best. Yes.
		
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			Very true. And this shows to us that while we need to learn how to be good towards our parents, at
the same time, we also need to learn about how to parent our children, those of you who are parents,
this is also something that we need to learn about. Because any role that you have been given in
life, if you want to be good at it, you need to gain knowledge about it. If you're bad to somebody,
not just once but again and again. There's no way that that person is going to be good to you for
the rest of their life. If they're really good people, they might smile at you MC Sadam
occasionally, but they're not gonna give you stuff they're not gonna give you love and stuff. Except
		
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			our parents, they've been so good to us. So even if sometimes they're tired, and they lose their
patience with us. They've been so good to us. We have no right to get upset with them for anything
because we've been battling. They've been good to us. I've been saying the same thing, but it's
important. They've been good to us. Yes. And this is their son.
		
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			Sound like
		
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			I've learned that, you know, just listening to something your parents say and like, doing it really
saves you from a lot of harm. Because last year when I was we were on vacation and I want to wear
like these flip flops because they match like my outfit or whatever. And my mom was like, you know,
you should wear your like trainers or whatever because, you know, we have to walk and stuff. And
then I was like, oh, you know what, okay, I'll just keep them with me in the car and stuff. And
basically like they were my new Nikes and someone got in the car and actually stole bone. So, you
know, it was pretty sad for me but like I realized that if I listen to what you've been wearing them
		
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			you're in diapers just to my knee, one of my sister in law. She said that I am not going to clean my
baby's diaper. I said okay, when she had a baby for the one whole year she was using the glove,
plastic glove and cleaning the baby until
		
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			The other baby came then she was used to that I will not touch the I will not touch the
		
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			zero. Then she used to be the next baby. It's so difficult accepting the challenges of motherhood.
Really. It's so difficult, but think about how much parents do how much they sacrifice just to raise
you. And they do it happily.
		
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			Salam Alikum. I remember once I called my mother and I was asking how we feel in house, the medicine
she was taking medicine. And then she said you care about me and she looked out for me. May Allah
make your kiddies have mercy on you. So I remember the same day is like few, maybe a few minutes
after I finished talking to her. I take my medicine because I wasn't feeling good. And then the
medicine like I took it this outfit so I get really, really not feeling good. My daughter she came
and say, Mommy, can I make a sandwich and she started making me sandwich, massaging me Subhanallah
do ask him right away.
		
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			A man said that he wants rode with Abu Dhabi lavarnway to his hometown in El RPQ. And when we would
I rather low on who he entered his hometown. As soon as he entered the area where his mother used to
live. He couldn't wait and he shouted out in his loudest voice. Are they gonna sit down? Well, what
Allah he will occur to hear Omata Oh, my beloved mother, Mae Salam and mercy of Allah and His
blessings be upon you. And from there, she replied, were alayka Salam, wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh
and Peace be upon you in the Mercy of Allah and His blessing. He said, may Allah have mercy on you,
as you raised me when I was a child, she replied, Oh, my son, may Allah Who repay you well, and be
		
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			pleased with you, as you were dutiful towards me when I was old.
		
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			The thing is that when we are good towards our parents, we're getting double benefit, and not just
double, many, many benefits. One is that A, the exam that they did to us, at least we are, you know,
doing some good in return, that can never match the good that they've done. But at least something
and this is a sign of being a grateful person.
		
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			And secondly, when you do good towards your parents, you know what you get their dollars, and no one
in the world will make dua for you. The way your parents will make the offer, you know, what,
		
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			really, the way your parents make dua for your health, for your success, for your happiness, for
your ease. Nobody makes the offer you that like that. You asked so many people remember being near
to us remember being your daughter, how many times you tell your parents, Mom, please pray for me,
she'll pray for you. Even before you think about praying for yourself.
		
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			I was just thinking that when you said many of the things that we say to our parents when we're
annoyed, right? Sometimes we say that, you know, I wish you weren't my mom, I had a different cooler
mom or whatever. And then you really think I mean, come in basic biology, you are who you are.
Because you have that Mother, you came from your mom and your dad with their combined
characteristics. You are who you are. So if she wasn't your mother, you wouldn't be who you are. And
so that kind of shows that you can find common ground between your parents and yourself because you
came from them. So there should be there is a middle ground and you just need to find it. Yes, over
		
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			there. I just want to quickly share something my mom pulled me in the kitchen and like made me cook
at a very, very, very young age. And I hated that so much. And then I became a responsibilities I
had to cook because I was oldest daughter. And every time I'd cook something my mom would give me
two hours like Well, maybe you get the amazing in laws and may your life be like the best. And only
mom's dog getting so much dogs like I get it.
		
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			Yeah, you keep repeating the same dogs and I was like it's so annoying. And then 100 Law hurts when
you see the dogs actually being fulfilled. You praise like, you know, it's kind of like some next
level thing. And the second
		
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			and the second thing is my mom always used to tell me like she's like, you know, without me you have
no identity. And up until like, you know, recent years I didn't understand but when I see people
that are orphans, I understand that then I get it and I'm like oh my god I've handled a lot like I
have a mother.
		
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			Okay, recitation of these.
		
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			What?
		
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			Neither
		
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			one
		
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			can keep ha ha ha
		
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			Hola Kareem
		
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			was
		
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			Jana
		
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			Matthew mero
		
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			y'all