Omar Suleiman – Why Me #19 Why Did They Have To Die

Omar Suleiman
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AI: Summary ©

The rainbow's power is used to bring people back to their former memories and grieving losses, and to process the death of a deceased relative. The speaker emphasizes the importance of grieving and remaining true to oneself, as it is the only way to live a life of comfort. The rainbow's power is used to bring people to their former memories and to grieving their losses, and to avoid losing their consciousness and feeling sorry for themselves in order to live a life of comfort.

AI: Summary ©

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			Allah says in a Hadith Qudsi, I do
		
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			not hesitate about anything as much as I
		
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			hesitate about seizing the soul of my faithful
		
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			servant,
		
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			For he hates death, and I hate to
		
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			disappoint him.
		
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			But it doesn't just disappoint them.
		
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			Sometimes it can feel like it destroys those
		
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			of us who have been left behind.
		
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			Why, oh Allah, did they have to die,
		
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			especially now when things were finally going right?
		
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			On a personal level, I lost my mother
		
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			between my nikah and my wedding, and I've
		
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			been grieving her ever since.
		
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			And as much as I felt connected to
		
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			her when she was here,
		
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			sometimes I feel even more connected while she's
		
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			not here. Sometimes your relationship with the dead
		
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			is even stronger than when they were alive,
		
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			because in some ways you can do more
		
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			for them now than you could have done
		
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			when they were in this dunya. How?
		
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			Because before you couldn't do good deeds on
		
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			their behalf the way that you can now
		
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			And those good deeds on their behalf are
		
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			far more precious than anything you could have
		
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			benefited them when they were still with you.
		
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			While they move on to their new life,
		
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			hopefully in a better place,
		
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			your life will never be the same after
		
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			their death.
		
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			And there's the Sunnah of our beloved prophet
		
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			sallallahu alaihi wasallam in how we live our
		
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			lives,
		
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			and there's also his sunnah and how we
		
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			grieve our dead.
		
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			He buried almost every single one of his
		
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			immediate family members in his own lifetime SallAllahu
		
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			Alaihi Wasallam.
		
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			His beloved wife Khadija radiAllahu ta'ala Anha,
		
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			6 of his own 7 children.
		
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			He buries his mother when he's only 6
		
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			years old himself.
		
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			He buries his grandfather when he's 9. He
		
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			buries his father figure in Abu Talib under
		
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			the worst of circumstances. And of course his
		
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			actual father already had passed away before he
		
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			was born SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam.
		
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			And his grieving was so profoundly human yet
		
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			so perfectly prophetic.
		
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			In the famous incident of the death of
		
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			his son Ibrahim
		
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			as he's holding his son and his tears
		
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			are falling on his corpse, he says, Sallallahu
		
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			Alaihi Wasallam,
		
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			The eye shed tears
		
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			and the heart grieves And we are hurting
		
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			over your loss, oh Ibrahim.
		
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			But we will not say, except that which
		
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			pleases our Lord.
		
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			The The Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam had no
		
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			doubt about where Ibrahim was going, but he
		
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			was incredibly hurt over the pain of that
		
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			separation while he's still here.
		
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			He had full rahma, which is mercy,
		
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			and full ribah, which is contentment.
		
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			And Imam ibn al Qayyim rahimullah explains that
		
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			there is a genius to this and that
		
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			there are levels to the level of mercy
		
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			that you can have and the level of
		
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			contentment that you can have with Allah's decree.
		
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			The highest rank he says are those that
		
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			have both ribah, which is contentment, as well
		
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			as rahma, which is mercy. And he said
		
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			that's when the eyes cry,
		
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			but the heart is content.
		
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			Then he says below that is when a
		
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			person has rahma but they don't have rubah.
		
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			So they're grieved out of mercy, but they
		
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			can't find contentment in their heart and they
		
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			continue to be disturbed by that death.
		
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			The third level he says is when you
		
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			have riblah but you don't have rahmah.
		
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			So a person feels no emotions and is
		
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			not at all moved but they've still accepted
		
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			the decree of Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta A'la.
		
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			Then he says the lowest level is when
		
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			you have neither rahma or rillah.
		
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			So all you have is grief and resentment
		
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			of Allah's decree. The Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam
		
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			was of course the epitome of the highest
		
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			rank. And Imam min Taymir Rahimullah was asked
		
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			something very interesting about this.
		
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			He was asked, when you go through
		
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			the stories of scholars that came before, sometimes
		
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			you find scholars and great people in Islamic
		
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			history
		
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			who lost their children and they did not
		
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			respond with crying. They didn't respond with the
		
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			emotion that the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam responded
		
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			with. Particularly,
		
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			he was asked about the story of Fudayl
		
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			bin ayyad Rahimullah
		
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			who lost his beloved son, Yusuf, who died
		
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			in salah praying behind him.
		
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			And in full dayd loved him so much
		
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			but he was at the janaza
		
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			walking around with a big smile on his
		
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			face. So some of the people asked
		
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			him, are you grieving? Are you okay?
		
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			He said, I wanted to show Allah that
		
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			I accept his divine decree.
		
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			Now, if you compare the response of Fudayl
		
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			to losing his son Yusuf, to the response
		
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			of the Prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam to losing
		
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			his son Ibrahim,
		
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			Which one of them was the more perfect
		
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			response? Ibn Taymih Rahimullah said, It's actually the
		
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			prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam's response.
		
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			Because he didn't have to compromise his rahma
		
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			in order to have his ribah. He didn't
		
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			have to lose mercy
		
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			in order to have contentment.
		
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			Whereas the rest of us, we have these
		
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			two emotions and sometimes we have to privilege
		
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			one over the other in order to perfect
		
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			the emotion and Fudayl did not want to
		
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			show dissatisfaction
		
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			with the decree of Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta'ala.
		
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			In many ways, the janaza is more for
		
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			us than the person who has died.
		
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			As soon as we return from the graveyard,
		
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			we feel the emptiness of the home they
		
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			don't come back to. And we feel the
		
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			weight of our deeds for them knowing they
		
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			wish they could still do them for themselves.
		
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			People can outlive their biological clock,
		
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			but you're a huge part of that. Any
		
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			good that they did, any good they may
		
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			have taught you, any way that they benefited
		
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			you,
		
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			carry it forward and be part of the
		
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			reason that their scrolls of deeds continue even
		
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			after their scroll of decree has now fallen
		
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			from the throne of Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala.
		
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			So that their actions can continue to benefit
		
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			them
		
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			and also benefit generations still to come on
		
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			this earth.
		
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			And one of the best ways to cope
		
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			is not just to be a source of
		
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			goodness for the newly departed,
		
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			but to be a source of comfort to
		
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			others that are now grieving the same loss
		
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			as you.
		
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			When you heal them,
		
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			Allah starts to heal you. And even if
		
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			you feel like you're hurting most,
		
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			the widow that focuses on caring for her
		
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			children,
		
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			the child that now focuses on his widowed
		
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			parents,
		
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			all of that is of the best ways
		
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			that you can grieve and continue to be
		
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			elevated.
		
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			For the one that's now gone,
		
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			Allah has decreed memories for us sometimes as
		
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			reminders to not forget,
		
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			and sometimes as a gift to get you
		
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			through.
		
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			Cherish those memories that you had together in
		
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			this life,
		
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			Then make new memories through the duas and
		
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			donations on their behalf that you'll be able
		
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			to celebrate together in the next life inshaAllah.
		
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			Death can be the greatest teacher we have
		
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			and the people that have gone ahead have
		
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			taught us in so many ways and we
		
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			often learn so much more about them once
		
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			they're gone.
		
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			Their hidden struggles or their hidden good deeds,
		
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			the responsibilities
		
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			they had that we now have to assume.
		
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			But imagine out of everything your parents taught
		
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			you, Allah decrees Jannah for you through your
		
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			being patient with their death.
		
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			Allah Subh'anaHu Wa Ta A'la says in a
		
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			hadithqudsi
		
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			maliabdilmuthminiandijazaibaqabatul
		
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			safiyahuminahlidunya
		
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			thummahtasabahu
		
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			illaljannah
		
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			I have nothing to give but Jannah as
		
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			a reward to my believing servant who if
		
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			I cause their loved one to die remains
		
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			patient.
		
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			And that's not just true for our parents
		
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			but anyone we love.
		
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			Allah knows how much you love them and
		
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			how much he restrains your pain for them
		
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			out of your love for him. And sometimes
		
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			that alone is enough to earn you Jannah.
		
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			La tastaghribwuku
		
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			alakdarimadumtafihabihidar
		
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			So long as you are in this world,
		
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			be not surprised that the existence of sorrow
		
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			for truly it manifests nothing but what is
		
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			in keeping with its character
		
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			or its inevitable nature.
		
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			This temporary life we live is just a
		
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			cycle of events to be patient with and
		
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			events to be grateful for.
		
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			The moments when you are tested with loss
		
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			reveal your truest character and commitment.
		
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			That doesn't mean that loss won't hurt,
		
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			it will.
		
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			It can tear apart your happiness and make
		
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			you question your own will to continue on
		
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			in life.
		
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			But the new connection Allah may be building
		
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			between you and him and you and the
		
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			others around you may be truly special
		
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			while he's also not letting you get too
		
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			attached to this life.
		
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			The prophet SallAllahu Alaihi Wasallam said, Be frequent
		
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			in remembering death for it is Hadim al
		
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			lathat, the destroyer of all pleasures.
		
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			Because Inna lillahi wa inna ilaha hiji'oon, to
		
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			Allah we all belong
		
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			and to Him we all return. And that
		
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			puts into perspective how every single person in
		
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			our lives
		
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			and every single piece of us is on
		
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			its way back to Allah and at the
		
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			time which he decides.