Omar Suleiman – A Dua Away #02 How To Truly Perform Istikharah
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Trusting in Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala doesn't just
mean trusting in his power.
But it also means trusting in his wisdom.
And sometimes that's a lot harder to do
with your dua.
So sometimes
you might feel like you know exactly what
you want and you're looking for the perfect
way to ask for
it, but part of that relationship of trust
with Allah
is that you actually want Him to give
you what's best for you even if that
contradicts what you so desperately are asking for
initially.
Jabir ibn Abila
is a young man who struggled immensely in
the time of the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa
sallam. His father is killed in Uhud and
Jabir radiAllahu ta'ala Anhu is left with a
whole bunch of debt
and 7 sisters to take care of. And
he's the one who narrates
this hadith about
the most famous
decision making dua in Islam,
which is known as dua alistikhar.
And he says,
That the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam used to
teach us to make Istikhara
with all of our affairs
in the same way that he would teach
us the Quran. Now obviously if you're reading
that you know that this means that istikhara
is very important. But there's a specific messaging
here. Just like you resort to the Quran,
just like the Quran has guidance in all
affairs of your life, just like you have
the repetition of the Quran, just like you
have
the precise wording
of the Quran,
you have salatulistikharah.
And an imam ibn Waslan al Shafi'i Rahimuhullah,
he says that what's implied here is that
you don't change any of the words of
this dua. You don't add to it. You
don't take away from it. You say it
exactly as the prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam taught
it in the same way that you recite
the Quran.
And he says that clearly there is blessing
in the specific wording that the Prophet Sallallahu
Alaihi Wasallam is using in salatulistikharah.
And imam ibn batarahimullah
says the other implied meaning of this is
that it is not befitting for the believer
to rush into any matter,
minor or major, until they first seek Allah
Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala's guidance. And so istikhara
is not just for some major decision in
your life. Meaning, it's not just for marriage
and it's not just for trying to get
into a particular program.
It is for every single element of your
life, and that is the relationship of dependence
that you have upon Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
and he says something deeply profound. He says,
so the Prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam is showing
us that the relationship of Istikhara
to the affairs of our lives is like
the relationship of Quran
to salah. The relationship of the recitation of
Quran
to every prayer. So basically,
life without reciting Istikhara is like salah without
the recitation of the Quran. That's how important
this dua was to the companions of the
prophet Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam.
So what is Istikhara and what isn't Istikhara?
So first and foremost,
Istikhara is not a magic pill. It's not
something that suddenly
clears the fog and gives you all sorts
of clarity and opens the pathways for you.
It's also not a dream and this is
probably the hardest thing for people to come
to terms with. If you're trying to get
married to someone and you pray Istikhara and
you see them in a dream it's probably
because you really want to marry that person,
not because of the Istikhara.
Istikhara
is not necessarily connected to your dreams. It's
a dua'a for guidance, not something that shows
up.
There are no colors that you see at
night that indicate yes or no. There's no
such thing as an Istikhara ferry. Yes, I've
actually heard some cultures where you put yes
and no under your pillow
and you make dua and then you pick
one of the pieces of paper and see
which one it shows up as. That's just
our desire to always get the direct answer
that we're seeking from Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
but part of our dependence upon Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala
is giving the process to him and giving
the outcome to him. And so istighara
is actually asking Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala
to guide you to the right way
after you have done everything in your power,
in your capacity
to find the right way. So basically after
you've done your own homework and you've covered
2 other bases of decision making, you come
to Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala for the final
blessing. What does that mean? 1st and foremost,
you exert your own efforts and your own
thinking to see if this is good for
you in your Deen and your Duniya.
Secondly,
you consult righteous people, you seek consultation, you
do Istishaara
which is seeking people's advice to see if
this is really the best thing for you
in your deen or your dunya and then
you go to
Allah after your own deduction and that righteous
consultation
and you say, oh Allah facilitate it for
me if it's good for me and take
it away from me if it is bad
for me. And this is why, subhanAllah, some
of the scholars even mention, waltekhunalistisharatu
kablalistikhara
that you should seek consultation
before you doistikhara
because even when Allah addresses the Prophet Sallallahu
Alaihi Wasallam, he says, washaawirhumfil
amri faizaazamtathatawakil
Allah That seek their consultation and then once
you come to a decision
then put your trust in Allah Subhanahu Wa
Ta'ala. And Imam An Taymih Rahimullah says, no
one regrets the Istishara
of the creation, the seeking consultation of the
creation and the Istikhara, the seeking
guidance from the creator. And Qatar Rahimullah said
no one is going to cover these two
bases and then not come to a blessed
decision.
So how do you actually pray salatulistikhaal?
The prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam said, idahhamma
bil amri
That first and foremost, you pray 2 rakas.
Now, by the way, these can be any
2 rakas that are not Fard. So it
could be your sunnah prayer, it could be
entering upon the masjid. Some of the scholars
said, especially if you combine it with some
of the times. So you could do it
at salatulduha,
for example.
And any 2 rakaas that you're going to
pray that are not far'ut,
just make the intention for Istikhara as well
and then read the dua after you finish
those 2 rakahs.
And if you make this a daily habit,
and that's the implication here that the Sahaba
would do this a lot, where most of
us probably do this like 3 or 4
times in our lives.
If you make this a daily habit even
with your Fajr salah, right, the 2 rakahs
before Fajr, that you're going to pray 2
raka'ahs and make that du'a,
then think about how much more clarity you're
going to have in life and think about
how much more blessed
your decision making and your decree is going
to be. So you pray these 2 rakas
and then the prophet sallallahu alaihi wa sallam
said after the salaam you make the following
dua.
So, O Allah,
I seek Your guidance in making a choice
by virtue
of Your knowledge. So first and foremost,
you're asking Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala by virtue
of recognizing
that Allah knows what you do not know.
And so I don't understand the full consequences
of my decision.
So I've covered my basis but, O Allah,
I'm looking to you for your ilm, for
your knowledge.
And I ask you by your great bounty.
And that is the recognition that everything that
Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala gives to us is
from His graces, from His Fadl. And so
I'm asking you from your great bounty
and you have power and I have none.
So SubhanAllah, even if I know what's good
for me,
I can't pursue anything without Your ability, O
Allah. So I am recognizing Your knowledge, I'm
recognizing Your grace and I'm recognizing
Your power
to achieve what I cannot achieve on my
own. And subhanAllah
here, You say, for verily You know and
I do not know, You are the Knower
of
al ghayub, the unseen things. Why is this
so profound? Because
you've done your homework on the seeing things
but there are certain elements of even the
seeing things that you can't see. So oh
Allah, you know everything
that I don't know about the hidden realities
of this decision. And that's tawakr, that's trust
in Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala because things can
check out a 100% through the first through
basis.
But here, O Allah, You are Allamul Ghuyub,
You are the Knower of all hidden things.
And then You say,
Allahumma
in kuntataalamu
annnahadalamra
khayrunli
fiddini
wamaashi
waaakibati
amri
faqturhuli
wayasirhuli
fumma bariklifi.
Oh Allah, if in your knowledge
You know that this matter is good for
me, 1st and foremost in my religion.
So
my religion is the most important thing in
the world to me, so anything that I
want,
I want it to impact my religion positively.
If it's going to impact my religion negatively,
then I definitely don't want it even if
it's good for me in regards to my
worldly affairs. So first and foremost, you know
that this is going to have a positive
impact on my deen.
Secondly, on my livelihood.
Thirdly, haaqibati amri which is the final outcome
of my affair which is the hereafter.
So, O Allah,
if You know that this is good for
me in my deen,
in my livelihood,
and in my final outcome when it's all
said and done, a'aqibati amri in the Hereafter,
then three things, ordain it for me. So
you ask Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala for the
Qadr of it, which is the decision. So
ordain it for me. Secondly,
make it easy for
me. So make the process easy for me
as well, oh Allah.
Thirdly,
bless it for me. So the outcome also,
let it have barakah in it, oh Allah.
SubhanAllah, you're asking Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala for
the Qadr of it, for the yusr of
it, and for the barakah of it, for
an easy decision,
for an easy process, and for a blessed
outcome.
But then here's the harder part of the
Istikhara.
You turn to Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala and
you say, wa'in kuntata'alamu
annahaadalamra
sharunli
ponder on every word, you'll see the blessing
of it. In your knowledge, oh Allah, you
know that this is going to be bad
for me and my religion,
or bad for me and my livelihood,
or bad for me when it's all said
and done, then don't decree it for me.
So take it away from me, right?
And turn me away from it,
which means do not let my heart become
attached to it. So subhanAllah you're not just
asking Allah to turn it away from you,
you're asking Allah to turn you away from
it. Why? Because if your heart remains attached
to that thing then you're not gonna have
peace of mind. You're gonna keep on saying,
well, maybe there's still a chance. Maybe there's
still a chance, maybe there's still a chance,
maybe all the signs are not clear. Right?
So you're saying, oh Allah, take it away
from me and take me away from it
and then ordain for me good wherever it
may be, which also shows I don't know
where the next khayr is, I don't know
where the good actually is going to be
and how many times did we think
that all of the doors were shut only
to find a door that we didn't even
know existed open for us and have what
was better for us all along. And then
finally, aarudani bihi, make me pleased with it,
oh Allah, because as the scholars say, fa
innaqadyaasruulakaal
khayr walakinnaqilaatardabihi
It might be that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala
facilitates for you what's better,
but you are not pleased with it. Now
in the previous du'a, SubhanAllah, you ask Allah
for arriba ba'adulqaba,
to be pleased after the decree, and that's
in general. But here, even with something specific,
oh Allah, as much as I want it,
if you know it's going to impact me
negatively, especially in regards to my deen and
my akhirah, take it away from me, O
Allah, and then let me be pleased with
that outcome. Let my heart,
you know, also have no connection to that
anymore. And you'll see this by the way
with with some of the Sala Rahin, with
some of the Righteous they spoke about this,
that they wanted something or someone so badly
and then it was as if Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala turned their hearts away from it.
And that could be a direct result of
this du'a. Now the last thing I'm gonna
say here is how many times do I
do Istighara? Like at what point
do I decide that Allah has closed this
door for me? And the answer is there
is no limit to how many times you
do istighara,
but go back to your other decision making
mechanisms
and try to approach things rationally
and approach that same group of people or
someone that you trust so that they can
help you see things clearly
And that's where you make that decision at
that point. You've asked Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
for a good outcome and at that point,
you know, you make the best decision
if the door seems to be closed and
you say Alhamdulillah
regardless and it may be that Allah Subhanahu
Wa Ta'ala will open the door for you
later, maybe even that same door for you
later.
And in the meantime, Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala
has something along the way. At the end
of the day, trust that Allah Subhanahu Wa
Ta'ala has something good in store for you
and the fact that He allows you to
make this du'a is of the most beautiful
signs that He has something good in store
for you. Abu Bakr ibn Ayas Rahimu Allah
He said that, qala baalhuqama
that some of the wise people of the
past said, manu'atiya
arba'an lam yumna arba'a that whoever is given
4 things will not be deprived of 4
things. Menoratiya shukra lam yumna'an mazid, whoever is
given the blessing of gratitude
will not be deprived from increase.
And whoever is given the ability to repent
will not be deprived from acceptance.
And whoever is given the blessing of Istikhara
will not be prevented from guidance. Wamanu'ati al
mashura lam yumna issalab
and whoever is given advice is not going
to be deprived of correctness. May Allah subhanahu
wa ta'ala grant us goodness and correctness in
all of our affairs.