Naima B. Robert – Biggest Barrier To Pleasure For Muslim Couples
AI: Summary ©
The speaker discusses the causes of relationship trauma, including a lack of education and fear of sex education. They also mention that people may have a deep ingrained sense of sex and fear of sex education. The speaker suggests that the cause of these experiences is a lack of education and that sex is a bad act by which most humankind was created.
AI: Summary ©
Break it down for me. Biggest barriers to
pleasure for Muslim couples. What's going on?
Fear,
shame,
guilt,
sometimes inherited guilt,
and trauma.
Mhmm.
This is from from
men and women.
Growing up in households where * was not
discussed,
growing up in households where the sister couldn't
say that she was on her period and
had to lie and pretend that she fasting
because, no, your brothers can't know, and any
talk about the body was forbidden.
It comes from
relationship trauma, because whether whether it is haram
or not,
Muslims have * outside of marriage.
And sometimes they do it in a way
where they expect that there's gonna be a
different outcome. But when the outcome is
this person just had * with me and
left me, it can leave you with relationship
trauma.
So now you feel guilty
for doing this act, and then you you
you you focus that guilt on yourself. You
start to shame yourself.
It comes from a lack of education
and a fear at getting at at getting
the education. You know, you have Muslims who've
been married for a number of years who
are like, Angelica, I can't, you know, read
this book that you told me to read
because what if my husband sees me reading?
I said, what if your husband sees you
reading a book about *? That's you're trying
to be
the best partner for your husband in this
life that you can be. What what is
where is the fear coming from? But you
have people who have this
deeply ingrained mistrust of their own bodies
and a fear of sexual education because they're
afraid of of of
Allah not loving them. I've had people say,
well, Allah will not love me if he
knew how much I love *. I said,
well, let me let you in on no
secret, sis. Let me let you let let
me let you in on a little secret.
Allah already knows.
You thought you were hiding it.
But the cat literally is out of the
bag. Like It's gone.
A lot already knows. Oh. But but but,
you know, peep people see a lot as
babies. Is Allah is vengeful. I've had sisters
tell me in tears
until I started talking to you, I thought
Allah hated me all these years.
I thought Allah hated me. So it really
comes it it it always goes back to
Allah. It always goes back to Allah. What
do we think about
our creator? What do we think about our
bodies that are creations of Allah?
How how do we connect to ourselves and
how do we connect to another person? How
can * be bad if it's the very
act by which the majority of humankind was
created?