Musleh Khan – Life #12 Why did Allah put me in a marriage filled with problems

			Why did Allah put me in a marriage with so many problems?
		

			salam Wa alaykum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh. This is a story. For a lot of you out there. You found
the love of your life. You got married, and you did everything right. You prayed your istikhara you
made your door, you met both sides of the family. Everything was smooth when he left your hand.
Except the day you got married a few days later, everything turned upside down. And it was just
problems after problems, whether it be between you and your spouse, whether it be with your in laws,
whether it be with family, it could be so many things. Why would Allah put you in a situation like
this? One of the answers is founded Sudha to Now, listen to this verse. Allah subhanho wa Taala
		

			says, While law who gyla can mean and fusi come as well as what gyla Common SOG combining our
Halford paws, Allah says that he is the one that placed for you. This spouse will love Regina luck,
Coleman and fusi come as wager, Allah placed for you the spouses and the spouses. Allah says men and
physical it came from you. Now what is this a you're talking about? Your spouse, the fact that if
you did everything right, you sought istikhara and direction from Allah, You did everything right
that you knew, in order to make that decision and marry that person
		

			of luck chose that individual for you. At the end of the day, despite all the darkness you made,
that's the person Allah chose for you gyla Leko but then the aliases min and fusi come from
yourself. So you have two things, a love place this person for you. And number two, that person is
an extension of you. What does that mean? The scholars they say, literally, your spouse is an
extension of you. This person has similar qualities just like you. And even if you don't see it
early in the marriage, you might see it later on in the marriage. Who knows when that will manifest
because maybe for a lot of us out there, it looks so foreign, just got married, but you seem so
		

			different from your husband or wife. Allah says listen, I chose that person. And that person is an
extension of you. Then Allah continues what Jai, they'll recommend as well G comb, Benny now will
have heard then from your spouse's Allah subhanho wa Taala gave you children and grandchildren have
had that one of the meanings behind it is grandchildren could also mean in laws as well. So yes,
your in laws, Allah chose them for you. No matter how many problems or challenges you might have, at
the end of the day, Allah put those people there. This is really important. Why because we are
taught that we are not allowed to break relationships, especially with family. One of the reasons
		

			why is the fact that Allah chose these people to be in your life. Now you don't have the right to
just cut that off, because you just can't get along. This area also highlights a discipline that has
to develop in the marriage, which is you cannot be yourself anymore. But rather you have to be the
person that is best for the marriage. So certain tastes or delights that you are accustomed to.
Those are things that can be altered or changed for the sake of the marriage. It could be something
as simple as, oh, when I grew up, the fruit didn't taste this way. Well, this is an indication you
need to get accustomed to the way he or she makes the food. It's something as silly and as trivial
		

			as that becomes a major part of the marriage. It helps to develop that relationship because these
are two individuals with perhaps two opposite lifestyles that have come together to make one
lifestyle that requires the sacrifice that requires work. It requires focus, it requires knowledge.
This is why you always hear about those marriage retreats and programs and courses because it
requires some basic knowledge. But at the end of the day, brothers and sisters understand
		

			if you're finding a lot of problems in your marriage
		

			and you just don't know what to do. This area would at least in sha Allah, Allah encourage you, make
you feel good about yourself that, you know, Allah chose this person for me. So I gotta put in some
effort, I gotta work through this, I'm going to try to understand. And it will be very clear to you,
if there is just one person doing all the work. And you'll be very clear to you in that scenario
where the marriage goes, then you'll know whether the counselor comes in then you know, when he you
got to go to the Imam and you got to go seek help otherwise, just to remind yourself, and know that
Allah subhana wa Taala placed you in that situation, because Allah knows things that we don't know.
		

			And Allah sees potential in this relationship. Perhaps you cannot see at this time, you try your
very best to stay committed, try to work through those challenges, and just leave the rest of Allah
subhanaw taala. Remember, marriage is half of our Redeemer, and prophets highly sought was salam
taught us this. As a reminder, one of the meanings of this hadith is half of your deen is complete
when you can navigate through the hardships and the challenges of that relationship. If you can
manage that, then you can manage the challenges that come along with maintaining your relationship
with Islam. So may Allah subhanho wa Taala give you strength, give you focus, increase your Eman May
		

			Allah subhanaw taala bless your marriage Lachman, me