Muhammad West – The Women Around the Messenger SAW – Episode 45
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From the layer below the mean, so that was Ramallah, marine syedna Mohammed mala and he was a marine brothers in Islam Assalamu alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh. Thank you so much for joining us this episode 45 of our series of listen women around the messenger sort of low value asylum. And in our last episode, we're talking about the question does Islam oppress women, and we looked at way women were in other societies in the Jamelia society, in the Persian Eastern societies versus the Christian Jewish societies. And then we looked at what Islam offered women. And we said many societies at the time, 1500 years ago, they saw her as someone that was subhuman. That was evil,
that was spiritually deficient than a man, that she was something that was a commodity to be used and bought and sold. She had no power over herself or property, and she was purely purely at the will the whims of men. Then we saw Islam came about and we began by saying that Allah Subhana, WA, tada blessed her by number one, making her spiritually equal to men, that her purpose in life is the same as that of mean, and then her position with allies the same way that of men. Then we mentioned in terms of the Sharia in terms of the law, if you lived in an Islamic State, the Sharia gave women the rights that were far beyond its time, literally 1000 years ahead of its time, we said that's a
lot in the modern Western world, which is taken today as the benchmark as the be all and end all when it comes to women's rights, we will begin to see how far behind the Western society was compared to the Muslim Sharia, or Islamic Sharia up until recent times, for example, and you know, I've provided a list of laws that came into effect certain rights that were given to women in Europe versus the Sharia. So for example, in 1869 1869, was the very first time women were allowed to attend Cambridge University, compared to Islam in 859, meaning a full 1000 plus years before that, the first university on Earth was established by a woman. So 1000 years before women could even
attend universities. In England, women were already establishing universities in the Muslim world, we said 1870 the first time women were allowed to really own property, and own things in her own name, without being married or owned by her husband, her father, we still of course, in Islam from inception, a woman was always what she received of inheritance, which he earned with her money belonged to her completely, something very strange Panama. In 1820, the very first time women were allowed to practice law and accountancy now as an accountant, I find that quite amusing that it is only been 100 years that women were allowed to be accountants in the Western world. Now we compare
that to the Muslim world. So in the European world, women were not capable was seen as competent enough to deal with legal matters. Islam, we gave the very first must have the very first quarter. And it was interesting to have saw our mother, the wife of the grace, perhaps or the daughter of cinnamon, she was the custodian of the most of people, the halifa would come to her, like, say, North man came to her and said, Look, you are the custodian of the code, the only code and the only written code on Earth, we trust it with you, can we please borrow it and make copies for Hannah law. That is how much we how much we honored and entrusted our women, we feel that women were only
allowed to vote less than 100 years, and be part of certain government positions, not it's not even been 100 years that women were allowed to be in ministerial roles. In many parts of Europe, we see that I shadowed Yolanda from the earliest days more than 1500 years ago, she was in charge of an entire army. Now swana law, these laws, we don't know these things. And we begin to assume that Islam, you know, is the reason and the cause for pushing women to the back. And Islam is the reason that she is unable to further herself and she is in fact neglected. This is not the Sharia, whenever we see and without a doubt within Muslim society, within Muslim countries, we see women are
definitely being neglected. So I can say Alhamdulillah with full surety, as a father of a daughter, as a son to a mother, as a husband, to my wife, brother to a sister, that Islam and the Sharia does not at all or policewoman or rather it liberates women. But if the question were to be asked to Muslims have placed the women there in here, I'm not so sure. In this situation, we find that supine a lot. Sadly, we as Muslim, we as Muslim men have not fulfilled the Amana that Allah has entrusted us with. We have not fulfilled the laws of the Sharia and given our sisters the position that they rightfully deserve. And in fact, it is so sad when we think that the very last advice that some
lawyer seldom gave to us to be the last thing he said, I'm not even don't come up shake, not even anything else.
Except a solar a solar, why Monica, a man who can take care of solar and look after your women. This was his last advice to his oma and very sadly we must admit as men that we have fallen short How is it that we will look at the different Alomar councils factor committees? We don't find a single sister on the board, mini massage. It's Rihanna. She's not even interested to be on the board of the ministry. What about the title of the solo sanlam when women have the highest authority, when women are interested, it's vital to keep the only Muslim in the world is in the hands of hopstop. So we have really gone we have gone backwards, not the Sharia. And that is why an important area of
discussion is how we as men should treat our women. This is something so so important. This is something that if any blame is to be put on Islam in terms of the treatment of women it is Allahu Allah is free of any blame. The Sharia has no blame the Hadith the Quran is free of any blame. It is miles ahead of every system on Earth, but the blame lies with the Muslim men. And it's the vim not returning to the book and the command of Allah and the student of NaVi so seldom did we see the sexism, we see this, this oppression of women within our within our community, so much smarter, grounded understanding and grant us to live up to that level of true manliness in our Islam, this as
mean in terms of how we treat our women, as well as his original como una Anissa. That a true man, a man is the one that actually looks off the end case for his womenfolk. This is really what it means to be a man. And we have fallen short of that mark. And it's not us that have taken the blame or rather our Deen is taking the blame. So we're doing a great disservice to Islam. We know from the Sharia, if we look at the Quran, we look at the many, many advices Allah has given us, Allah says in the Quran in terms of male and female relationships, Allah Subhana Allah says, Oh, you will believe do not it is haram for you to inherit women against her well, that this was of course a practicing
jatiya an evil practice that Allah has forbidden women are not allowed to be inherited, then overseas, and do not make difficult life with him. If you are married to your wife. I'm currently sitting with a number of managers, when people complain and many times it's the sister who is being mistreated, and she's crying and she, she's miserable in her marriage, Oh brother, oh husband, Allah says to you, and don't make difficult for your wives making life so unbearable, so that you can take back that which you have given in terms of adultery so that you can financially harm her except of course, in the case where she has committed clear immorality, if your wife has done a major, major
sin, she's been unfaithful in that case, of course, then separate from her. And then Allah says to me to you to every single person addresses this to the mean, and once is specifically to the main, what should be my roof and live with him in my roof, my roof is kindness model is justice, my roof is comes from an era that which is known that which is
you know, with a kid nice commonly what is a reasonable all I say, look with him in a way that is expected by all as being good in a manner which is pleasing to everyone live with her in a manner that is fee that is kind that is just this is how you should live. And if you are in a marriage, and you're treating your wife in a certain way, you are burdening how certain things and vice versa assistance, perhaps your husband is the one who's taking the short end of the stick here, you need to always ask yourself is this matter of is this relationship that we have this arrangement, whether it is the financial chores, whether it is the domestic chores, whether it is the children is this
amount, or is this fee between the two of us. So Allah commands, you and me live in the roof with one another. And then unless he's this beautiful thing, and again, the ayah is addressed to the men, but of course, by implication to the sisters as well. But Allah has, you know, in the Quran, you'd find certain laws, a lot of decency to the men and certain laws, etc, to the women, even though it applies to both. But Allah specifically mentions a certain group here, because they would be the ones that are sometimes deficient in that regard. So Allah says to the men, and if you were to hate something in her, if you were to dislike something, if you dislike your wife, for whatever reason,
then consider perhaps, perhaps you dislike something. And Allah has put in that thing, many, many good things in it, that you don't see the good sides of it all you can see all the negatives. So before you want to be harsh with her before you want to separate from her before you want to Ill treat her, think about it a lot must have put many, many good qualities in her but you are not able to see that and perhaps you are disliking that which Allah has made something good for you. So this is how Allah, you know, Allah speaks to us. How we should treat the wife that we hate, that we dislike. So hon Allah kindness, key concern, think about the good side. What about a life that is
faithful? That is good to you? that pleases you? How then do we miss three things?
Even in divorce, even when we have gotten to the point where we can't
Live with each other, and then we're going to separate from each other. Allah subhanho wa Taala mentioned to us that
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una de Muro that Eva, keep her in kindness, remain married to her on a good way in a way that will make her happy in a way that will be pleasing to both of you all, if you can't do that, then leave us separate from her Bill maroof. Also in a nice way, in a kind way, in a respectful, honorable way, separate with her even in divorce, you'll be good to her in a nice way, and almost says very clearly to us, one or two sooner, there are only taboo, and don't keep her like as a form of oppression, do not keep her to harm her. This is the wrong thing that we should never do that our wives and our husbands, they should never, for a moment think to themselves, my life would be so much better
without this man without his wife. And the minute we think like that, can we as partners should really have a deep introspection in how we are living with one another. There are many of us, as I said, we go through difficult times during the holiday period, many of these problems arise. Ask yourself all the time, what is it for my wife to be married to me? Meaning what does she get out of living with me as a husband? If her life was better off without me in it, then Subhan Allah or whatever I really contributed to her well being. And similarly your sisters, if your husband needs to think to himself, my life would be so much better without this woman in my life, then around a
lot, you need to think very, very hard and clear what it means for you to be as a wife, oh, lady comes to the column asking for advice. And he says to her, do you have a husband? She says, Yes, I have a husband. So the Prophet says, Look to how you treat him. Be very careful how you treat your husband, because he is both your gender and your jahannam meaning he is the one that if you please Him and you do your duties as a wife, almost guaranteed you go to jail. And if you were a good woman, but a bad wife, and it could be the reason why you interjected them. Similarly, the Prophet says to you and me Omen, that I have not lived a greater fitna for the men of my alma, then women.
And usually when we think of this hadith we imagine the Prophet is talking about fitna in terms of the beautiful women out there that might tempt us into Zina. Yes, that's one interpretation. But the women that we should really worry about, it isn't the woman that's on the side of the road, or the woman that is not dressed appropriately. Rather, we should worry about the woman that is next to us in our house, we should worry about how we treat our daughters and our mothers and our sisters, because they testimony for us or against us will count very, very severely on the day of karma, that if our wives are the ones that testify against us as harming them as taking their rights, that we
will in fact, oppresses and tightens the use of Hannah law, this would be a means May Allah protect us that we do not intergender. So be really careful in that fitness practice. In terms of that is your wife that is your mother is your sister. Of course. Also in this relationship between us men and women, there is a great possibility and chance for us to into the highest levels of gentlemen, the prophets of Salaam says the most complete believer, the man who has the greatest level of a man are those who have the best character. And the best of their meaning the best of the best, is the one who treats his wives the best is best to his wife. He did not say so send them the best man is
the one who makes the most urgent or pays the most charity, or does the most amount of Hajj rather, is the one who has the best character and in particular, the one who treats his wife the best why the wife because viola, she is the one that sees him in every mood and situation. It's easy being you know, the nice guy when you're coming to work, smiling with your friends and your colleagues smiling with you know, the neighbor, but two, three o'clock the morning when you're moody and miserable, when things are not going so well. Can you still maintain your alarm? you adapt your good character, even at that point in time, a man who can do that the prophet SAW Selim says to us he has
the highest level of emancipation a lot something to aspire to, oh, my brother's wife that is sitting next to you. Now she could be the ticket for you to intergender not you know without having to do great acts of ibadah just pleasing her and being honorable to her and being good to her might be the means by which you intergender I mean, the prophet also notices to the system should I not tell you about the women of Jenna, what is the quality of a woman that will intergenic he says a woman of Jenna she is one that when she's upset with her husband or husband is upset with her. She will go to him you know before she goes to bed and she takes her hand into his hand and she says
what can I do to make you happy because I don't want to sleep with you angry with me smiley faces. This is a quality of a woman of Jenna. Sisters. your husbands will upset you brothers, your wife would upset you be the bitter person, not for her not for him for the sake of Allah because that person and that moment you might feel you know not so nice towards that person and
You don't want to do your duty towards them. You don't want to be the good husband because maybe justified but when in those moments, be the better person for a love of Allah because he will give you something better and you will earn your agenda through that. The prophets are seldom says to you Oh mean, would you not like me to tell you what is the greatest treasure in the dunya The best thing you could possibly have? The best thing of the man is a righteous woman who when you look at her, she pleases you that she preserves Your Honor, when you're away is dignified towards you. She acts and a woman that acts in accordance with what you have requested of her. If you have a woman that
does these things that you have as an ABC is the greatest commodity on Earth. There's nothing better than that of the man and the Prophet sallallahu wasallam. He says to the sisters, that if you were to perform your five daily solace, and you fasted in the month of Ramadan, and you call it your chastity, and your husband was pleased with you at the point when you passed away, not that he's happy at you dying, rather, that when you died in a state where he was pleased with you that he says this was a good woman, then it will be said to you or sisters into whichever of the a dose of gender you choose. Any new agenda is for you. Just perform sada fasting Ramadan, God your chastity, and
please your husbands of Allah Allah, that is what we should aspire to achieve between husbands and wives, between you know, men and women, this relationship Allah subhanaw taala made us in pairs He made us from the day were created alone made for us to be in Hobbs, we will have certain characters certain ways as husbands as men, Allah made us from that which is dead, the earth, that which was dirt really. And then he made our mother, however, from something alive from our father items that have made it alive. And in that you will find differences in the way a man thinks in a way the man operates, and different to the way the woman thinks and the way she operates. But in the union of
husband and wife, and you know, looking at the basis of our qualities, that is perfection, that is what Allah subhana wa Taala wants from us. And for those of us who are married, what hamdulillah Always remember that our responsibility in the dunya is to look after each other to be partners with each other, so that we can be united in general with one another. As I said before, there is nothing in the Sharia that I have found, where one person can be elevated to another station of gender simply because of them being together. So we said that, you know, if you choose a good wife, or a good husband, and even though you have not fulfilled all the responsibilities that you were supposed
to do in terms of a Muslim, but you get to Jenna, your wife, your husband gets a higher place in general, it will be allowed for you to be elevated to be upgraded to be with him or her in general. In our Sharia we don't have this thing till death do you part, rather, the only thing you really swallow this is an amazing thing. When we die, we leave this dunya we won't find our core engine, we won't find our house in general, we won't find anything of this dunya in general, the only thing that is where the agenda is that pious hasn't been that pious wife that lived with you that you know, encourage you to be a good person, you'd find this person with you in general. So when you
look at your wife, your husband really you looking at insha Allah jannetty a piece of heaven on earth if you want that. This is behind Allah. Allah is saying to us, this is what Allah is telling us. And we pray in sha Allah, that if we correct the way we treat each other, both husbands and wives will not just about the husbands. Also many wives mistreat their husbands. When this issue of how Islam teach women, it will go away. And people should really look what we want and the time to come. When people look at the way Muslims treat a woman has been seen their wives, how we treat not just in terms of marriage, but in terms of how we treat our female employees, how we treat her in
society, women as scholars, when they outsiders look at us, they should say we wish our society treated us like they did. Today that's not the case. And we should have a deep introspection reflection. why that is. We all have mothers daughters, sisters, wives. Let each of us treat the women in our life according to the commander of libido seldom look after your womenfolk letters for fullblood Amana insha Allah We hope that we will see the stigma disappear with time. Thank you so much. I will continue in our next episode we will discuss some of the more controversial issues pertaining to women and Islam. There are certain laws that are specific to women that we might find
strange, you know, why does the Sharia allow this Why does the Sharia not allow this? There are certain differences which favor men and certain differences which favor women. We'll talk about this in sha Allah in our coming last five or four episodes. For any specific questions, concerns, comments with [email protected] to Zack Allah. Hi, Monica. Fly with the cattle