Muhammad West – The Women Around the Messenger SAW – Episode 06

			salatu salam ala Sayyidina Muhammad wa ala alihi wa sahbihi My beloved brothers and sisters in Islam
Assalamu alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh does Allah say thank you so much for joining us this
episode six of our series, women around the messenger sallallahu sallam, and a belated eager Mubarak
to everyone. That's with us. I hope a Lost Planet Allah bless you and your family with a glorious
and wonderful eat. My Allah subhanho wa Taala grant of a judge hajima bowl Hashem abroad, those who
are returning home from from the Holy Land from Allah grant them a safe, safe departure and return I
mean, Allah subhanaw taala blessed us in the year to come. This being the 12th month of the egeria
		

			May the New Year, bring only goodness and Baraka to you and your families and to the entire oma at
large, and also has Allah bless all of us. I mean, welcome to the law,
		

			background series women around the messenger sallallahu sallam, we spoke about the the years of of
marriage between the Prophet peace be upon him and his beloved wife hydrolysis of Salaam. We spoke
about her demise in our last episode, in the saddest moment of the life of the Prophet, peace upon
him the injury that we would carry for all of his life. She was 65 years old. He was 50 years old
when she passed away. And she was his partner, his confidant, his soulmate, the person who was the
dearest to his heart. And at the worst moment to the lowest point in his life was when she had
passed away, both from aside from my personal side, of course, but even from the side of the dollar.
		

			He's his mission in terms of being a prophet was going through the most difficult period, where he
was being rejected by his people, when he was being despised, and when his community was going
through severe severe persecution, and they really seemed like there was this cloud hanging over the
Prophet peace be upon him, and he was going through a deep depression. We mentioned some of the ayah
to Allah subhanho wa Taala.
		

			inshallah, Masha, Allah, you know, st verses to motivate the prophets of Salaam, you know,
encouraging him that this difficult period and we'll pass that off to this man also, you saw that
video after this difficulty, ease will come that surely Allah promises off the every difficulty, the
ease and the conflict will come. So how would this cloud disappear, and we would the profits will go
from here, because who could replace Khadija who could really there was no one and even all the
other wives of the Prophet peace be upon him, that he would meet many wonderful women, they would
come into his life, no one would truly be a Khadija and Felicia was one of a kind. Just a side note
		

			here too, to make you understand who she was. We've said that all the other wives of the Prophet
peace upon him, they would meet, they would meet him often, they would marry him as a prophet, and
they would love him and respect him and admire him because of his weakness, but also because he was
a messenger of Allah. So Allah Khadija, of course, she she knew him even before his days of
prophethood. And she loved him for the man who he was. And she got to know him and see him growing
up that's been 25 years together. And we see that they had seven children with each other. So there
was this very, very deep bond that they shared. Also, another side note here with the Prophet peace
		

			be upon him in the current world that we live in. He's regularly insulted. He's regularly criticized
for his his his relationships with the number of wives that he had, we should, you know, pause and
think for a moment, for the first 25 years of his life. Professor solemn, was a bachelor, he had not
interacted with any women, when he met her deja. And then for the next 25 years of his life, he was
only with her. I remember once when I was speaking about the advent of Nevada, the the event where
the Prophet peace be upon him, received revelation for the very first time. And I mentioned how he
ran home to his wife, you know, someone who was new to the dean said, well, which wife did he come
		

			to? And he said, he only had one wife is only Khadija that up until the age of 50, the Prophet peace
of them had only known one woman, he would only live for another 13 years. So it's only in this last
13 years, that really the Prophet peace upon him, would marry multiple wives. And in each wife, we
will see, the reason behind it was, you know, was purely for the purpose and for the service of the
dean, there was a, a religious reason behind it. And as we go through the series, one of the
objectives was to understand why the Prophet peace upon him married each and each of these wives.
Without a doubt, when we look at it, Khadija was as we could say, the closest thing that we could
		

			call a soulmate, and there really is going to be nobody that could truly fulfill, you know, and
replace that hole in his heart and throughout his life, you would mention that. So the Prophet peace
upon him after the loss of Khadija is going through this deep depression, and the community, the
Muslim community, the small group of community that he was leading, they became very concerned about
him. And there was this Muslim lady by the name of Hola. She was a matchmaker. So what you would
have in Mecca, you would have these
		

			On TVs that would know who will the single goals or what he did to get married, they would know who
all the young men was. So they know the bachelor and the bachelorette, it's, and they would sort of
play matchmaker, they would say, you know what, your daughter would be a good match for this son.
And she would sort of, she would hook him up, if you will, and follow up today, you know, this, this
is something that he still needed, you find many, in many cases, single people are always looking
for that right spouse, their perfect spouse, and having someone who has a good idea of the
community, maybe it's your mom, maybe it's a family member, who has, you know, knows exactly who the
		

			single people are in the community, it's a good place to go to find to find a good spouse, you know,
as Muslims, courting is not as free and as easy as you find in a modern society. You need to really
look and do things appropriately, to find your spouse to find that perfect person that meets all
your criteria. And it's good to have any mom or a relative to go to and speak to I know, it's not
the easiest thing. It's very awkward. But perhaps this is something that we should relook at. So in
the McCain community and Islamic community, you had these matchmakers and they would suggest who the
appropriate, you know, person would be the best person for you. Maybe it's like a Facebook, you
		

			know, 1000 year one and a half, 1000 years, Facebook, back in the day. So this lady Hola, this
Matchmaker, she comes to the Prophet salsola, after a couple of months have passed after the death
of Khadija, and she's used to that and be so solemn, that the Allahu Allah she was a believer, and
she says to me out of law, it's time that you move on, basically, yes, you can never ever replace
Khadija. But you need to basically move on in terms of you need an A wife, you need someone that's
going to share this burden that you are currently, you know, you know, you're abating this burden,
and it's too much for you, everyone can see that you are struggling at home At home, your house is
		

			empty, it's it's like a cemetery, it's your whole house is in mourning, and you're struggling on the
outside, you need a change. And I suggest that you remarry. And you know, the Prophet peace upon him
is very reluctant, because in his heart, there's no one lady that can that can, you know, ever come
close to her deja? So wholeness is here Rasulullah sallallahu sallam, I actually have already two
women in mind. They're two women, I can suggest for you to marry you choose. So he says to her,
Well, who are these two women that you have in mind? So she says I have an older woman, a mature
woman, a senior woman, a woman that has been married a woman that knows how to be a wife. And I have
		

			a young virgin girl that has never been married yet. She has just recently become mature. She's
ready for marriage. Which of the two would you prefer? So he says, tell me more about each Wednesday
said as for the oldest senior woman, the is the sister so that been summer. So there have been a man
who was about the age of the processor level even older, she was about 5355 years old, a very mature
woman, then as for the younger girl, she said the daughter of abubaker eyeshadow on her, she's ready
to be married. So which of the two would you prefer? Now, if we were to pause for a second, and we
were to think if you were in the shoes of the professor, you have on the one hand, so there was a a
		

			very, very senior woman we couldn't, you know, actually an old woman, she was perhaps a grandmother
at this point in time, we'll get to know that she was a very large, plump woman. And yeah, you have
Ayesha, who is a very beautiful woman. She's just you know, in the, in the, in the height of a
youth, she's now ready to get married. Who would we think though, would be the best match for the
province or lamb? In his current situation? Which kind of life does he need? Now, when we watch, you
know, in the 21st century, that we live in our idea of, of marriage and what a marriage should be?
Sometimes it's not. It's not. It's not accurate, not not real. We, you know, we imagined falling in
		

			love finding, you know, we find the right partner and we fall in love, and it's all romance. And
it's all about, it's about being in this wave of bliss and happiness, in reality, and Islam is very
pragmatic. Islam is very realistic in terms of why people get married, people get married for a
number of different reasons, you know, partly to find companionship, partly to find love. Sometimes
it's for financial support. Sometimes it's for physical needs, whatever it might be Islam, Islam is
very broad, and says, You, you know, wherever you are in your life, whatever your priorities are,
you can get married both men and women, for the things that you need, and you find many Subhanallah,
		

			as a new mom, you find, you know, men and women come to you and they say, Look, I'm single, and
currently, maybe a woman says, I'm devoted to my career. I'm a career woman. My career is my
priority. But I'm also lonely, but and I also would love to have a partner, but I can't be a full
time in inverted commas. I can't be a full time wife. I wouldn't mind having a husband that is
basically with me on weekends. And he doesn't have to support me as he needs to support another
wife. I can support myself, but I'd like to
		

			companionship. Is this permissible, of course, it's permissible, you know, if you find someone was
on the same page as you in the same wavelength, and this is fine. So Islam is a very pragmatic, it's
very, it's very understanding to the needs of people and you get married according to your own
terms. Islam basically says people are mature enough to make their own decisions. These are the
parameters of what's halal and haram. Within that parameter, you can set your own rules and terms in
terms in how you'd like to be married. So now when we go back to the prophet SAW Selim, what does he
need from a bride? Does he need a young blushing, cute, Ayesha? Or does he need a senior mature,
		

			strong woman that is going to basically hit the ground running knows exactly how to be a wife. Of
course, he needs a soda. This is a very, very strong argument against those that says the Prophet
peace upon him married for lustful reasons, the prophets of Salaam has the choice between two women.
And he chooses the one that we would say, you know, clearly I say was the more attractive of the
two. And he chooses soda for reasons that were far more important than just physical appearance. So
he says, to hold up, go to soda. And, and mentioned me to her and tell her that I'm keen on Getting
married is she interested in getting married. So now, who is sewed up in December, our mother sewed
		

			up in December, as we should, she was about two, three years older than the processor lump she was
anywhere between 50 and 55. At this point in time, she had been one of the early women that embraced
Islam, one of the early converts, and she had been married to a man called saccharin, like many of
the early reverts are those who embrace Islam early on, they have a high prestige. Allah mentions
them in the Quran, the Saudi code and a one on the very, very best people of his former, the very
best of Sahaba are those who embraced Islam early on. And so that was one of those early group of
believers. And she went through the persecution like many of the of the Sahaba, as well. So her
		

			husband and her were embraced Islam. They had left Mecca, and they had gone to a senior, you know,
some of the books of history even mentioned, that soda had had been the first woman, nearly the
first batch of people she was the first woman to actually leave Makkah for the sake of Islam. So a
very, very pious woman and devout woman for the sake of the deen. And as we said, she was very
advanced in her in her years, she was if we were to imagine her. And as I said, it will be very good
for you to have an idea of each wife. And as we said, they all had their own personality. They look
different. They had their own style and their own ways of doing it to show you that these are the
		

			best women, but not all of them were identical. But ej is a very unique character. She's strong,
she's confident, she's witty, she's, she's intelligent. She's, she goes for the things that she
wants. So doubt, what is she like? So from a physical aspect, so that is a very large woman. She's a
big woman. She was of all the wives of the Prophet, and then she was the largest of all, she was
really tall. And she was also very plump. She was a bit chubby, and she was around woman. And we
said that she was basically a grandmother. She had met soccer and her husband had passed away
recently, she had finished the EDA, she, you know, marriage was the furthest thing from her mind.
		

			She was loving, she had returned to Makkah. And she was living with her a very old father, Zama
gruff, old man. And she really didn't imagine that she would she would ever marry again, she thought
that those years will fall behind beyond. I mean, even in today's day and age, a woman that is
around 55 years old, is not expected that she would marry again in the society 55 was close to when
you basically passed away you very senior in yours.
		

			In terms of a personality, our mother, mother soda was, is described as being this warm, jolly,
deeply affectionate woman. You imagine her as those that this you know, we have these Auntie's in
our life, that is always in a good mood, always in good spirits. And her whole outlook in life is to
be is to support the people around her. She's always making sure is everyone fit? Is everyone warm?
Is what can she do to make everyone else comfortable, she has so much love inside of her. And that
all she wants to do is to share that love that warmth with everybody else. So the mother sewed out
on the lawn. Hmm. If we were to say outlook in life, she was a woman that was very happy and
		

			comfortable. Being in our home, looking after her family, she was very comfortable. Being that
domestic lady, being in the kitchen scene to the chores and the needs of the family. That's exactly
who she was, and hamdulillah nothing wrong with it. So in our in our modern day, and he would be
like the number one housewife, if you would, the homemaker and not like she's very different to
Khadija. But each one has its own strengths. And each one is loved and cherished in our Sharia
today. You know, when we say a woman, he says, I'm just a housewife. We it's almost as if though
there's something missing in that nothing wrong in being a woman that is is devoted to the needs of
		

			the family. And many of us have
		

			When we grew up, it was either a grandmother or a mother, when Auntie that really, you know, took
the slack of the entire family, they would be the ones that would fix the kids from school, they
would be the ones to make sure that everyone else was was seen to. And we find today, when many of
our young women, you know, are working in their career focus, that that's one of the areas that is
very, very difficult to find, to find someone that is able to keep the family together, and every
family needs a woman like soda. So these women in our society, they go, they go unbanked, they go
unmentioned, it seems as if though they are they don't contribute, when in reality, most of us if
		

			not all of us, have, we have a mother went on to a grandmother that did so much for us as we grew
up, that we are that we stand on the shoulders to move forward. And so we really salute these women
that really keep our family are the glue that keeps our families together. So that is exactly that
person. So she comes to the professor of life. This is the perfect person to really enter his life
in where he is right now. So hola goes to soda. And she mentioned this to,
		

			to soda, she says, soda, I've got some good news for you. So this is what is this good news that you
bring me. So she says, I have a proposal from the Prophet sallallahu sallam, he's keen on marrying
you. And so now mother is quite shocked. And she you know, as mature as she is actually still, you
know, when you I want you to imagine she's just a very sensitive soft woman as well. You'd find
later on in life, many of the other wives soda would be you know, they would they would they would,
you know, tease with her. And she'd be a very soft, easily a woman that is easily get shy, she
easily gets embarrassed, he easily gets scared you so this is her outlook. So when she hears that
		

			the proximity is interested in marrying as she like, she begins to like giggle and she she's I can't
imagine Is he really interested in marrying me? Are you sure Hola. Don't you know? You're making a
joke? And she says No, I'm serious. The Prophet peace upon him, has asked if you would be keen on
marrying him? And she says yes, I would like that very much. But you know, awesome. My dad. So even
like, she's in a 50s. And she's still like a young girl. She says, Ask my father what he thinks
about it. And when this old man hears about it, he's also happy with a proposal. He says, that's a
good match. Mohammed is a is a respected man. And if she wants to marry him, then I give my
		

			blessing. So the prophets of Allah marisota in the the year after, you know, a few months following
the death of Anita is about 50 years old. She's around 55 years old. And immediately she takes up
the responsibilities of his household Nietzsche enters his house, and she brings about many changes
in his house, he, he moves that cloud that had been settled, after the death of her deja, she takes
charge of his of his daughters that have not been married Fatima, and Uncle Tom that are in the
house, she tells the profit, social and basically, all your domestic worries and needs. You don't
have to worry about that I am here, whatever you need, I will support you as best I can. And you
		

			know, she even went beyond just being that housewife support. She would try her best to bring the
professor love happiness and bring him joy and comfort. So I should mention that soda had a very
jolly side. She was fond of laughing and making other people laugh. And one day the prophets of
Salaam comes home after giving Dawa. So he's out in the streets, calling people to Islam. He
obviously had a tough day he comes home and he's and he's quite depressed. He is this. He said, He's
still physically grieving, and emotionally grieving. And so soda wants to make her husband happy. So
she says to the prophet SAW Selim jasola. I have I'd like to tell you something funny. So he says,
		

			What is this thing you want to tell me? This is you know, last night, as is your custom you woke up
to form dadgad, a prophet side note to the Prophet sallam, he always had to perform dadgad there are
certain laws are certain rules which apply to the prophets of Salaam, a personally one of those
rules was that he always had to make the habit every single night without exception. So he would go
and you'd make gadget on his own. So he says, when you get up with the hatchet I want, I don't know
if you noticed, but I stood behind you. I also wanted to make Salah with you. And when the prophets
of Allah would make the hatchet he would really stand long hours and hours and Salah, this was his
		

			own personal ubaidah. And he would stand for many hours that he said, I deserve that I deserve and
he would be a little cuckoo for a long time. So she said when you went into the pool, and you will
making a call for so long, you know, I felt like my nose was about to bleed. So I had to while I was
painting. I was holding my nose to keep it and so she was Could you imagine me standing the in ruku
holding my nose waiting for you to come from medical properties. And I didn't even realize that she
was there. And when when she tells him the story and she shows him basically as she was standing, he
burst out laughing across the lambs mood had changed. And this is the kind of woman she was I would
		

			say about soda, that of all the women of prophets of Allah, all the wives of the Prophet Allah. The
woman's
		

			she admires the most the woman that she really wishes she could be like, what soda, because she
would say that soda had such a clean, innocent, pure heart that she was loving and caring for
everyone she put the the needs of others, even her co wives later on would see she put them above
the needs above her own. And she was always simply trying to please everyone around them. What a
great woman that she was. So she enters the household of the salon, and she really brings about
changes and makes brings peace and comfort to the salon. She's another to his daughters, she's
likely second mother, she basically raises them after the death of Maria. So another few years go by
		

			and these are the worst years of persecution the next three years until Allah subhanaw taala grants
that the Muslims now can perform hegira So from an Islamic history, we would know that the Prophet
peace upon him would spend 13 years in Mecca, preaching, calling into Islam after the death of
Khadija 10 years and then three years would go by and now would become the what we call the hegira.
The migration where the people the Muslim community would leave Makkah and they would go to Medina,
the Prophet peace upon him, leaves Mecca, and he has to leave very secretly because the Qureshi had
made up their mind to assassinate him. So he leaves Makkah along with his very close friend Abu
		

			Bakar of the line. The two of them leave secretly, they alone they leave their families behind, and
they escaped to Medina when hamdulillah Meanwhile, back in Mecca, soda and the household of the
prophets of the lamp, Fatima and Uncle whom are escorted to Medina with the help of Zaid and Elliot
on the line. And soda being an old woman, being a very senior woman she was she found traveling very
difficult. I she tells us that when they traveled on the hegira, soda had to wait and she had to
every you know, half an hour every hour of traveling she had to risk she couldn't travel. It was
really difficult on her so I mother soda. In this age, she performed her hegira she was close to a
		

			60 or 80. And she performance 100 our hamdulillah also something we learn about soda, mother soda,
something very irrelevant to hedge. We would know that if you want hedge after the day of alpha, you
would go to his deli for the evening. So off the market on alpha, alpha is done. You go to alpha,
you stable, steady firm, ideally all the way to Pfizer, you stay from Missouri, until Pfizer at Mr.
Alpha. And this is what the prophet Sam did. However, we know from our mother soda, she was now
quite a senior woman This was almost close to her 70s when she performed Hajj with the Prophet
sallallahu sallam, she basically asked the Prophet peace upon him for permission to leave Muslim
		

			early, maybe around two, three o'clock the morning before fudger. She says Can I can I leave and
avoid the the traffic jam, avoid the drama, The crowding, see if I can, if I can get a head start,
then I can finish my rituals easily. So I show again. And we'll get to speak about how she knows all
about these issues always in the company of soda. She says that so soda asked for permission to
leave. And the Prophet peace upon gave her that permission. And this is a rasa, this is a allowance
because of soda. The entire oma from from the time of the problem until the end of time. Women and
children the old those who are accompanying them have an A leeway to leave early to leave to study
		

			for early in the evening. You have to spend at least until 12 o'clock the night until midnight, you
need to stay there. But you have a you can leave before 5pm This is a great blessing brought about
by soda, I should say is that you know when she when soda asked for this permission, soda the
Prophet gave Sodor the agreement and those who followed with her and she says you know, she will get
to know is personality. She's very fiery. She's very confident. She's very energetic. She says Now I
want you to stay until budget and I stayed until budget but I regretted I should have gone with soda
because it was was was way more difficult. I should have gone with soda. So then you beta. So this
		

			is another soda. Another rule that we learned from soda. Something which is very controversial in
our in our in our modern day is the ruling of hijab. It's mentioned that the hijab the rules of
hijab, they weren't the originally but the law came down to Allah subhana wa tada on account of
soda, the issue of hijab as we see it as a controversial issue, you find even some modern thinkers
saying that in the Quran, you don't even find hijab being applicable to the women, they will say if
you open the Koran, you only find one verse in the Quran, which speaks about hijab, a woman having
to practice hijab, and this only applies to the lives of the prophets of Salaam. And we will say
		

			yes, if we read the ayah they are hundreds 100% correct in what they're saying. But what they are
trying to actually achieve by this is falsehood is not the truth. And we'll explain why. Why this is
in our next episode in sha Allah. So we'll talk about hijab, what is hijab? What is the rulings from
the Quran? What are the difference opinions and we'll discuss this in detail inshallah. Allah for
bidding your time with us for this episode. If you
		

			Have any comments or concerns you can email me directly on whisper [email protected] and you can
respond in Charlotte to our WhatsApp line. Please feel free to let us know what you think just like
I said I want to come up with a lie but it got to